The Man Who Can't Be Moved
by Jenny0719
Summary: Bella Swan is personal assistant to 'The Sexiest Man Alive', Edward Masen. Their natural chemistry has them giving into temptation, but will Edward's fame tear them apart? Or bring them closer together?
1. Chapter 1

**I don't own Twilight or anything related. But the dog is mine...**

**The title may not make sense right now, but it will eventually. **

**Also, please keep in mind that plagiarism is theft and be respectful enough not to steal...**

**This story is rated MA for LEMONS. IF YOU ARE NOT OLD ENOUGH TO READ MA/NC-17 MATERIAL, PLEASE DO NOT CONTINUE.**

* * *

Chapter 1

**Bella**

"Argh!" I coughed and sputtered as the dog shook itself, getting soap, water, and slobber in my mouth. "You stupid shit! Stop doing that!"

I hated my life.

When I was a little girl, I dreamed of being something big and grand; a Pulitzer Prize winning novelist, an award winning journalist, a renowned poet. By now, I thought I would be in a serious relationship, ready to settle down somewhere remote and obscure as soon as I graduated college. Then I would gallantly start my life in the real world, getting a great job and spending all of my free time writing my first, best-selling novel.

God, I was way off.

My life was nothing like I'd thought it would be. I was working my way through college as a freaking dog groomer. I attended USC -a far cry from the college in the small suburban town I'd pictured for myself. I didn't even have a man to bring home, much less a serious boyfriend-not that I necessarily wanted a ring; I didn't, just someone I could call mine. The thought of sex was now an illusion. Once I got to college, I studied my ass off to _keep_ the scholarship I'd sacrificed my teenage social life to get.

My vibrator had somehow become my best friend.

And why you ask?

I blame my mother. My crazy, full of life, lovable mother who, shortly after I'd conjured up my future, divorced my father and moved us from the small, quaint-albeit rainy-town of Forks, Washington to where I am now... Sunny, picturesque, huge, star-studded Los Angeles.

Which brought me here. Standing in front of the biggest, most disgusting dog I've ever laid eyes on, just begging for someone to wrap the noose around my neck and kill me now. I had one year left-one fucking year-before I finished my degree in English. Which in itself was a joke. What was I going to do with an English degree? Teach?

Yeah, I see that one happening. Just like I see me going up on stage and singing in front of thousands of people.

"Seriously, Ang. This dog weighs more than I do. Who needs a fucking dog like this?" I tried to rinse him off, but he only managed to shake slobber all over me again. "Ah, hell. Now I need a bath."

She laughed at me. "I think he's cute, Bella. Just look at how his nose wrinkles up and his sweet face."

The dog's nose was upturned, and he looked like he had a slight under bite. And he snorted. This is cute?

"What kind of dog is this anyway?" I asked, finally getting some of the soap out of its thick fur.

"A French Mastiff." She looked at me strangely. "Haven't you seen _Turner and Hooch_?"

"Nope. Can't say that I have. I don't watch too much TV."

_Don't have time._

I finally managed to get the dog rinsed off and toweled him dry. I put his collar back on and attached his leash, then I let him out of the tub. The damn dog took off running towards the door, dragging me with him. I slipped on his wet tracks and effectively landed flat on my ass with a teeth snapping thud. It jarred my entire body, making my head pound.

"That's it!" I screamed at the dog. "You're getting put in a crate right now." I looked back at Angela. "And then I'm quitting." She looked at me in shock. "Seriously, I can't do this anymore."

I got the dog put in one of the crates and went back to the wash room, scrubbing my face with my hands.

"Know anyone hiring?" I asked in defeat.

"Actually, I might." I whipped my head in her direction. "A friend of mine is a PA for some movie star. She's quitting to go to law school, and he's looking for a replacement."

"PA?" I questioned.

"Personal Assistant. You know, water his plants, make his schedule, pick up his dry cleaning. That sort of thing."

I could do that. It sounded much better than this shit job I'd been doing for almost three years now. And the pay had to be better, too.

"Can you have your friend call me?" I asked hopefully.

"Sure. I'll have her call you tonight, and you can set up an interview."

"Great." I smiled gratefully at her. "Thanks."

I got cleaned up and started out towards my car, but instead decided to walk for a little bit to clear my head. I started towards the Walk of Fame, even though I wasn't interested in it, and watched the tourists snapping pictures of themselves and stars that belonged to people like Anthony Hopkins and Britney Spears until I got to the Kodak Theatre and decided to turn around.

I snorted and rolled my eyes. _Britney Spears._

I whipped around and bumped into a tall man in a black hooded sweatshirt. My steps faltered and the stranger grabbed a hold of my arms to steady me. I looked up and felt like I was in some cheesy movie. My pulse hammered loudly, roaring behind my ears, and everything felt as if it was in slow motion as soon as my eyes met his shockingly green ones. Our eyes held and no matter how loud my brain seemed to scream at my body, I couldn't move-I was hypnotized.

He released his grip on my arms, slowly brushing his hands across my skin as he dropped them, and I felt an electric jolt go through my system.

I shook myself out of the daze and cleared my throat. "Sorry," I murmured.

He nodded as he turned away. I never even got a chance to see his face; I was too wrapped up in those piercing green eyes of his.

* * *

"So, who's PA are you trying to be?" Rosalie, asked, popping a chip into her beautiful mouth.

Everything about Rosalie Hale was beautiful. She was tall-Amazonian princess tall-with long, bleach blond hair that was natural and these wide, violet colored eyes. Her skin and face were flawless, and she had a smokin' hott body to boot.

I felt like an ugly midget next to her.

Well, maybe not ugly-plain would be a better word for it. Every time we went out, Rosalie attracted all of the attention while I consistently was ignored. And with us living in the City of Angels, she was constantly accosted by photographers and slimy agents, telling her how gorgeous she was and that she would have a phenomenal career as a model. While little ol' Bella Swan was overlooked.

I knew I wasn't ugly-I wasn't stupid-but being friends with such an insanely attractive woman sometimes did a number on your self esteem. I was short, a mere five foot-three inches. My hair was long... most of the time. Every now and then I'd get a wild hair up my ass and chop it off. It currently was just past my shoulders and was a deep, dark brown with streaks of red that I never had to pay a dime for and was normally tied back into a ponytail. I had large, brown eyes, a decent nose, and plump, pink lips. My body was all right. Not nearly as curvaceous and well maintained as Rosalie's, but then again, I opted to be somewhat on the soft side instead of spending hours at a gym every day.

I sighed and threw her latest issue of _People_ at her. Angela's friend, Gianna, had called and asked when I'd like to set up an interview two weeks ago with the man who had just been dubbed "The Sexiest Man Alive".

It was scheduled for tomorrow.

"HOLY SHIT!" she screamed. "You're going be interviewed by Edward _Masen_!"

"Um, yeah?" I wasn't sure what the big deal was. He was just a guy. An extremely _attractive_ guy, but still, just a guy.

"He's the hottest fucking thing I've ever seen." She put the magazine down. "Well, second to Emmett," she corrected. "If I wasn't with Emmett..."

We all knew how "with Emmett" she was. I got to hear it on an almost nightly basis.

I shrugged. "He's okay." I felt a twinge of guilt for saying that. Like it was blasphemous.

She rolled her eyes. "He's more than okay. Bella, have you not seen any of his movies?"

"Nope. Probably won't either."

She looked at me incredulously. "You live in a hole, you know that? How can you live in LA and not know _something_ about the celebrities in this town?"

"I just don't really give a shit. They're just people."

"Whatever. So you know absolutely nothing about this guy?" she asked in concern.

"No. Just got an address from Gianna, his current PA." My brows knit. "Why?"

"Just..." She trailed off and opened the magazine. "Here, he's a womanizer. So they say."

I looked down at the article she'd turned to and read the headline. "_The Many Women of Edward Masen_. Oh, that's sweet," I said dryly. I looked at the two pages of pictures of him out with various women. "That's not too bad," I commented.

"It's a fold out," she said evenly.

"Oh."

I opened up both sides to reveal even more pictures of him with a different woman in each photo. He was always smiling down at the girl or kissing her forehead. I felt that strange twinge again, but this time it was almost like... jealousy. I looked at a picture of him smiling down at a tall, slender blond and for a fleeting moment, wished it was me.

"Well, that's just disgusting," I said, throwing the magazine aside.

"Just don't become one of those girls," she warned.

I grinned. "Trust me. That won't happen."

We said our goodnights and went to our rooms. I brushed my teeth and changed into my pajamas, then I crawled into the bed. I closed my eyes, trying to sleep, but all I could see was the picture on the magazine-the dark brown, tousled mess of hair on his head that had a coppery hue to it, his copper stubble on his strong, angular jaw, his straight nose, and full lips that curved into a sinful grin, revealing his perfectly straight, white teeth. And the vivid, mossy green eyes that seemed hauntingly familiar. Edward Masen had managed to crawl in my head and insert himself into my brain.

Exasperated, I got up and opened my laptop, opening the browser and going straight to Google. I typed in his name and got millions of results. I opted for the first one and saw the article I'd just been looking at with Rosalie. I quickly backed up and clicked on the next result, leading me to a website with a list of the movies he'd been a part of since the very beginning of his career. In fifteen years, he'd managed to put out twenty movies-each one being a so-called blockbuster-and had two movies currently in post-production as well as another movie that began filming in a few weeks.

I clicked on a video showing a clip of him at some big premiere, giving the crowd a cocky grin and waving. He swaggered-actually fucking swaggered-down the press line.

I slammed the laptop shut and went to bed. He was the stereotypical actor-arrogant and self-serving.

I was totally fucked.

* * *

I got up and got ready for my interview, throwing clothes haphazardly on the floor in an attempt to find something that I thought was worthy of an interview with Edward freaking Masen. Once I finally managed to settle on a pair of charcoal pinstripe pants and a silk fuchsia tank top with a flurry of ruffles around the neck, the day progressively got worse. Not only was I wearing something totally uncharacteristic and uncomfortable-even if the pants did make my ass look great-but when I was putting on my makeup, I poked myself in the eye with the mascara wand. Then I burned my forehead with the curling iron, causing me to have a large, red whelp at my hairline. And of course, when I went to find my black ballet flats, I could only find one and didn't have time to search the entire apartment for its mate and had to settle wearing a pair of black peep toe stilettos.

Which meant that sometime between here and there, I would likely fall flat on my face.

I waved a quick goodbye to Rosalie on my way out the door, listening to her cat calls and whistles behind me and blushed furiously. I got into my piece of shit Volvo and started towards the Malibu address Gianna had given me.

I pulled up to the gated entrance and almost turned around. I was completely out of my element. This guy had more money than a fucking Wall Street broker. I just sat at the gate and gawked at the massive cream colored house before me. It was... perfect. There was really no other word for it. Every shrub, every flower, was meticulously maintained. The grass was an unbelievably rich shade of green and the house itself was spotless.

The static noise from the intercom brought me out of my haze, making me jump in my seat.

"Can I help you?" A calm, female voice asked.

"Um, hi. I'm Isabella Swan. I.. I'm supposed to be interviewing with Mr. Masen today?" I said nervously.

My heart was leaping into my throat, and I seriously felt like there was something swimming inside my stomach. My palms went slick and my breathing sped up.

_What the hell?_

"Could you please show me your ID? Just put it in front of the speaker."

I frowned. "Oh, um, okay."

I fumbled with my wallet and pulled my ID out, holding it up with shaking hands. Whoever it was I was talking to seemed to be satisfied that I was in fact Isabella Swan and the gate clicked and started to rise.

I slowly drove through the gate and parked up by the door. I got out of the car and fixed my pants, made sure my shirt was straight and my bra strap wasn't showing, and went towards the door. I got halfway down the walkway and heard a familiar, raspy bark. I turned in confusion to see the monstrous dog from two weeks ago come running full speed at me, its jowls flapping in the air.

"No!" I shrieked, holding my hands out in front of me, like that would stop it from running into me. "Down, Cujo!"

It jumped up and slammed into me, knocking me off my feet, and then started licking my face as it drooled all over my hair.

"Oh, gross! Get off me you slobbery piece of shit!" I screeched, trying to shove the dog away, only for it to not budge and inch. "God, I hate you! You... you... you fucking beast!" Lame, yes, but I was battling with the dog to keep its tongue from darting in my mouth.

I heard the most beautiful, deep chuckle coming towards me. The footsteps paused, and I heard a whistle, causing the dog to snap its head up and stop licking my face. The dog got off and trotted over to his master, wagging his tail excitedly. I brushed my matted, soaked hair out of my face and stood up, glaring at the dog.

"Such foul language to come out of such a pretty mouth," a smooth, English-accented voice smirked.

My entire body reacted to the sound of his voice. A rush of heat went straight through me, effectively causing me to feel the effects in between my legs.

_Just from his voice? Shit._

I looked to the source of the voice and felt my eyes widen. Edward Masen was standing before me, looking me over in amusement. His lips twitched like he was trying to hold back his smile.

I opened my mouth a few times to say something, making myself look like a deranged guppy, but couldn't make the words come out. The pictures in the magazine and online didn't come anywhere _close_ to capturing how incredibly handsome he was. My eyes roamed over his tall, chiseled body, and I wanted nothing more than to rip the black t-shirt and jeans off his body and have my way with him on the lawn.

I even felt drool trying to escape its way from my mouth.

I was no better than the dog.

I finally got my wits back and shook myself out the spell he'd put me under, only to say the most insightful thing ever.

"You're English?"

His eyes widened and his head dropped back as he let out a long, genuine laugh. My breath hitched in my throat with the wondrous sound.

"Yes. I'm sure there's quite a few things that you don't know about me," he said cryptically. He flashed me a crooked smile, and I nearly fell over. "I'm Edward. You must be Isabella?" he asked, extending his hand.

_Oh, God. I'm going to have to touch him._

I nodded and swallowed convulsively as I went to shake his hand. The closer my hand got to his, the stronger this insane buzzing feeling around me got. I put my hand in his and felt a jolt of electricity spark straight up my arm and through my body, making me whimper.

I looked into his stunned face and immediately pulled back, flushing from head to toe. "Sorry," I muttered, though I wasn't sure what I was exactly sorry for.

"Don't apologize," he said firmly. His green eyes ran over my body, scrutinizing me. He looked unhappy now. "I should be the one apologizing. Samson is usually very well behaved." He looked at the dog strangely, like it was completely out of character for him to jump on unsuspecting girls.

_Samson. How fitting. _

I snorted. "Cerberus there attacked me two weeks ago, too." I slapped my hand over my mouth. "Shit, I'm sorry." I groaned. "Ah, fuck. I went and said shit! In an interview!" I could feel the heat burning my cheeks again.

_And then you said fuck. Even better._

He merely laughed at me. "It's quite all right, Isabella. We all suffer from word vomit occasionally."

The way he said Isabella made my toes want to curl.

"So when you say my dog attacked you two weeks ago... What exactly are you talking about?" He looked at me quizzically.

"Oh, I worked at Groomingdale's in Hollywood until last week. I got the pleasure of bathing him for you. He was extremely well behaved," I said sarcastically.

He grinned and lifted his brows. "Well, you did an excellent job."

"Thanks," I said shyly, ducking my head.

_What is the matter with you?_

"Come on, I'll show you around. You're going to need to know your way around the house if you're going to be my new PA," he said pleasantly.

"Don't I need to be interviewed first?" I asked in astonishment.

He shook his head and started towards the door. "Isabella, I'd have to be a complete git not to hire you after Samson knocked you down like that." I just stood there. "Are you coming?" he asked, arching his eyebrow.

I nodded and hurried after him.

_God help me, I want to screw my new boss' brains out._

* * *

**Edward**

I couldn't get the girl out of my head.

Just the seconds-long interaction we had two weeks ago on the sidewalk in Hollywood had left me breathless and craving for more.

She was literally the most gorgeous thing I'd ever laid eyes on.

Her dark hair was shining in the sunlight, shimmering with red and her body... Oh, God her body. It wasn't muscled within an inch of its life or plastic in any way. It was small and petite-completely ethereal yet still managed to have curves. Her skin wasn't orange with the fake tanner that everyone seemed to be using. It was creamy and pale, flushing a delicate pink that almost brought me to my knees.

She was _real._ God, how I wanted her.

I wanted to stare into those beautiful, expressive brown eyes for the rest of my days. Forget sleeping, eating, or even _breathing, _I never wanted to look away from her again. From the moment I saw her two weeks ago, she had taken over my entire mind, danced in every thought. I wanted to feel the energy that flowed between us when I held on to her, steadying her so that she didn't fall. I was completely enthralled with her, and I didn't even know her name.

I didn't normally walk around such a touristy area; if I did, I'd never be able to leave. But I had a meeting with the committee of the Emmys at the Kodak Theatre. Apparently, they wanted me to present the award for "Lead Actress in a Drama Series", just because my newest costar happened to star in one of the shows. The meeting hadn't lasted as long as I'd expected, and the groomer's that Gianna had taken Samson to was only a few blocks away, so I decided to walk over and get him.

I was thankful now that I did.

Then Isabella Swan showed up for her interview and my usually lethargic dog plowed her down. All I wanted to do from the moment she stood up was snog her or shag her or _something_ because it was _her_.

I knew I should have rushed over and apologize profusely for Samson's actions, but it was so unbelievably funny to watch her scream at him and call him Cujo-like he was rabid. I tried to keep my laughter inside, but a small chuckle managed to escape my throat; I just hoped she didn't hear it as it was incredibly rude.

I made the mistake of shaking her hand, in an effort to see if the same energy flowed through my body when our skin made contact, and ended up getting angry at myself because it was so much worse. It was like a thousand volts, painlessly shocking my system and making me almost beg for more.

And in some twisted form of kismet, I couldn't have her.

She was much, much too young for me. Not many people knew my real age, just that I was a "thirty-something" year old man. The truth was that I was thirty-eight, making me old enough to actually be her father if I'd gotten my girlfriend in sixth form, Charlotte, pregnant.

And because I am a fekking masochist, I hired the girl-spot on.

I was literally going to become a wanker just so I could stand in the same room as her and not get a stiffy. Quite a ghastly thought, if I was being honest with myself.

It had been over two years since I'd allowed myself to have a physical relationship with a woman. No matter what the press and various publications said about me, it was all for show-a part of the image that had been created early in my career. Almost every woman I was photographed with I'd never taken to bed. I wasn't interested in casual sex. I was more of a devoted lover-which was quite unfortunate for my poor pecker.

I led Isabella to the house and fought with the gravitational force that seemed to be pulling me to her-like magnetism, two polar opposites irrevocably attracted to one another. I let Samson in first and watched him head straight for the kitchen while I held the door open for her.

She looked around and gasped softly as she took in the house. It had been completely remodeled by Esme, my mother for all intents and purposes, to resemble the manor house in Kent since I so rarely got to visit it anymore. I showed her around, pointing out every individual room and watching her reaction each time, enjoying it immensely. It was like she was seeing everything for the first time-perhaps she was. I knew nothing about the girl except for her age and that she was attending USC.

And that she didn't have a criminal record. Very important in my line of work.

I opened the door in the downstairs hall, leading to the kitchen, and smirked at her. "One of the loos." She giggled. "What?"

"Nothing. It's just that I never thought I'd hear someone call the bathroom 'the loo' in person."

"I have a feeling there will be a lot of things that one of us will say that the other will find amusing or won't understand. I've lived here permanently for a while, but sometimes you Yanks will say something that takes me completely off guard," I grinned crookedly down at her.

"Great. Language barrier, and we both speak English," she said wryly.

"I suppose it is," I mused.

I explained the list of things she would need to do for me, which made me feel irrationally guilty, but I couldn't pinpoint why. After all, I was hiring her to be my personal assistant. She was expected to work for the money I would be paying her.

Although, I'd pay her for nothing at all if it meant I could see her everyday.

We got to the guest room upstairs, and I gestured for her to go in. "This is your room in case you ever work late and need to stay." Her eyes went wide. "Gianna has only had to sleep over once because we went to a party and she was too pissed to drive home," I said comfortingly.

She seemed to relax. "Am I expected to attend parties with you a lot?"

_Yes, would you?_ "No. Only certain occasions require it." I changed the subject. "Do you have a mobile?" She nodded. "We'll need to exchange numbers so I can contact you if necessary. Otherwise, you'll be expected to arrive at my house every morning at eight for the list of things I'll need for you to do that day and then you are free to do whatever you need for the rest of the day. Gianna mentioned something about you completing your last year of university?"

She looked a little lost. "I have class at nine every Monday and Wednesday. There's no way I can get from here to USC in time."

I waved her off. "No matter. I also have a house in Brentwood, which is where I stay most of the time. And on those days you can come by earlier if you prefer. I'm up and in the gym every morning by six. Does this work for you?"

She nodded. "Yeah. It's great, Mr. Masen."

I didn't like that at all. It made me feel old-older than I am, that is.

I clucked my tongue. "Call me Edward, please. We'll be talking to each other much too frequently for you to be so formal."

"Um, okay. Edward." She shifted nervously.

I didn't bother to hide the smile that crossed my face upon hearing my name on her lips. "Excellent. I'll let you talk to Gianna so you can give her your personal information and she can answer any further questions you may have. I have a photo shoot that I'm scheduled to be at in just over an hour." I held out my hand. "Mobile, please?"

She mutely handed me her mobile and watched me program my number into it before sending a quick text message to my own mobile so that I could program her number into it.

I handed it back to her. "Thank you. I'll see you bright and early Monday morning then, yes?" She nodded, so I began to walk down the stairs. "Don't forget to have Gianna give you directions to the Brentwood house." I turned to her and smiled. "It was a pleasure to meet you, Isabella."

"You too, Edward."

I quickly found Gianna and told her Isabella was waiting upstairs for her before going to the garage and getting in my Aston Martin. As soon as I was out of the garage, my mobile rang.

I looked at the ID and rolled my eyes.

"No, Alice," I said immediately.

"Edward! You don't even know what I was going to say!" she chided in her high soprano.

"I can only imagine," I said sarcastically. "What do you want?"

"You met someone," she said knowingly.

"Who? My new personal assistant? I just got through interviewing her," I said with a grin.

"No, you daft prick. She's your _someone_," she repeated, stressing the last word.

I ran my hand through my hair. "It doesn't matter. Firstly, she's my PA. And secondly, she's too young for me."

"How young?"

I sighed. "Twenty-one."

"Edward, that's not too young! She's legal in every way. In both countries." Her laughter tinkled over the phone.

"I'm old enough to be her father, Alice," I groaned.

_Why did she have to be so bloody beautiful?_

"In what strange dimension would you _ever_ have been her father? You and Charlotte barely snogged, much less actually got naked and-"

I cut her off. "I get it, Alice. You're telling me I'm too bloody moral to have ever put myself in the position to be her father. It's still not happening. I'm her employer."

"Fine," she huffed. "Mum and Dad want to come and see you," she said, changing the subject.

"When?"

"When's good for you? You're the hot commodity," she countered.

"Let me get Isabella settled in and then I'll call you. Maybe in a month?" I asked curiously.

"Isabella, huh?"

"Don't start with me, Alice," I said in annoyance.

"All right, I'll stop. I'll tell Mum next time I talk to her."

"Will my annoying, ridiculously tiny sister and her Texan boyfriend be joining them?" I asked teasingly.

"Of course! I need to meet your new assistant," she giggled.

That was the end of the conversation. "I'll talk to you soon." I hung up before she could say anything else.

I adored Alice, however omniscient she seemed to be. She was adopted by our parents, just after I was.

I was only sixteen when Edward Sr. and Elizabeth Masen were killed in a car accident, thus leaving me in the care of my aunt and uncle, Esme and Carlisle Cullen, until I went to university. Even though I never changed my name, they are my parents. But hardly anyone knew this about me. According to the "Official Edward Masen Biography", I'm an orphan. Which is technically true. I just left out the part about Carlisle and Esme adopting me after my parents died, during my last year of school.

It would do them no good to be known as my parents, Alice as my sister. Not since I was currently being followed by three different photographers as it was.

* * *

**Okay, if I mess up on any Brit slang, you'll have to let me know. It's been a while since I was in England.**

**Cerberus is the 3 headed dog in Greek mythology that guarded the underworld with Hades if you're curious. My dog is the sweetest thing (and really messy), but people tend to get the wrong impression of him and are scared of him. Whatevs.**


	2. Chapter 2

**OK, I forgot to mention that since Edward and Alice live in the States, their speech will be a bit Americanized. There are things that one of them will think/say that is an Americanism that I'll put in or let slide because if you've lived in the US for a while, you pick it up...**

**Anyways, RL is a pain in the ass right now, so updates for all my stories are coming a bit slower than usual. Sorry!**

**Thanks for the reviews!**

* * *

Chapter 2

**Bella**

"So?" Rosalie asked as soon as I walked in the door. "How did it go?"

"I got it," I said feigning nonchalance.

I'd left Edward's house completely dumbfounded. He'd hired me without an interview, just because his dog jumped on me? For someone who had his visitors show identification before allowing them on the grounds seemed a bit... out of character?

But what the hell did I know about Edward Masen other than the fact that he was insanely good-looking?

The entire time Edward showed me around his immaculate, gorgeous house, I was in a daze. It was like I had been turned inside out, completely upended, just by being in his presence. The strange buzzing feeling that seemed to surround us never disappeared, even though Edward carefully kept his distance from me the entire time. The smooth, satiny quality of his voice sucked me in; I held on to every word. And forget about his lopsided smile. Every time one side of his mouth would turn up, his whole face would light up, causing his eyes to crinkle and make him look boyishly handsome-leaving me lightheaded and on the verge of fainting.

_I wonder how old he is..._

I stopped in mid-thought. It didn't matter how old he was. He was my boss. And entirely out of my league.

"That's great! We need to celebrate!" she said excitedly.

I groaned. "No, I'm not going out."

"Bella Swan, you are definitely going to go out this weekend with me," she argued.

"No, Rose." I repeated, this time a little firmer. "I have to study this weekend for a lit test on Monday. I can't."

"We can go to Area. I can get us in." It was like I'd never spoken.

I decided to go to my room and ignore Rosalie's thoughtful ramblings about this weekend. I'd been twenty-one for barely a month, and it was Rosalie's sole purpose in life to get me into one of those celebrity-infested nightclubs before I graduated.

_Maybe if I just go this weekend, she'll leave me alone._

Doubtful.

I spent the rest of the night studying and managed to get almost five hours of sleep before I had to get up. I took a shower and then went to my closet, just staring at the clothes in front of me, but unable to choose anything to wear. I bit my lip as I fingered through my clothes, hating everything I laid eyes on. I wanted to look nice for my first day training as Edward Masen's personal assistant, but still be able to go to class without attracting a lot of attention to myself.

And then there was Samson. I could pretty much guarantee the dog would jump on me again at some point in the day. I was lucky as hell the dog hadn't ruined my shirt yesterday.

I finally decided on a pair of black pants and a turquoise sleeveless sweater. I managed to get out the door on time, even with all the indecisiveness, and followed the directions Gianna had given me to Edward's Brentwood house.

I pulled up to the gate and punched in the code Gianna had given me before I drove through slowly and pulled up to the massive villa. My nerves started getting the best of me again as I walked up to the door. I rang the doorbell with a shaky hand and took a deep breath, trying to calm my rapidly beating heart.

Edward opened the door wearing nothing but a pair of black track pants and a soft whimper escaped my throat. His skin was smooth and pale-creamy like milk. His body was lean and defined, better than anything I could have ever dreamed up. It was just... amazing. I had to concentrate on not ogling his broad chest and ripped abs or the indent of his hip bones and the trail of dark, coppery brown hair that trailed from his belly button to his...

I snapped my head up and saw him watching me carefully, with a hint of humor in his eyes. I felt my face burn hot with embarrassment at being caught. The humor slowly left his eyes as he looked me over, his mouth turning down into a slight frown as he examined my chest. I glanced down and saw my nipples had pebbled and were now visible through my sweater.

_Shit._

"Good morning, Isabella," he said tersely. "I take it you had no trouble finding the house?"

I shook my head stiffly. "Call me Bella though, please," I said nervously.

"Bella?" he questioned, looking at me pensively. "No, I don't believe I will," he said suddenly. "Come along, Gianna is in the office waiting for you. I'll lead the way."

"So where's the dog?" I asked curiously, looking around and bracing myself for the inevitable collision.

He chuckled. "Outside. I assumed you would want to get settled in before he attacked you." His steady green eyes met mine. "Was I wrong?"

"No," I squeaked.

He led me through the beautiful house while I struggled futilely not to stare at his perfect ass. I wanted to reach out and squeeze it, to see if it was as hard as it looked. My brain was going completely haywire, racing with impure thoughts of my new boss as I looked around the immaculate rooms. Maybe Edward Masen was a touch OCD? Everything was organized and in its place, making me feel chaotic, like I was tainting his perfection.

I managed to clear my dirty mind as we came to a set of double doors. He opened them and went down two steps that led into a den. I took one step and lost my footing, slipping down the steps and landing flat on my ass. I closed my eyes and tried to keep my breathing calm, but in reality, I was freaking out. I'd managed to embarrass myself twice in less than five minutes. I was off to a roaring start.

Edward quickly crouched down next to me, causing his scent to waft over me and leave me utterly stunned. It was unlike anything I'd ever smelled-a mix of honey and apples and everything sweet I could think of yet was still unbelievably musky and masculine.

He tentatively reached out and pushed a lock of hair away from my eyes, causing a shiver to run through me as his fingers brushed along my skin.

"Are you all right?" he asked in concern.

"I, uh, I..." I had no words. I swallowed audibly and tried to gather my thoughts. "I'm clumsy," I finally said, flushing even more.

He chuckled at my admission. "I see that. Let me help you up."

He gripped my arms and pulled me up gently, gazing at me intensely. My heart thudded loudly in my chest and blood roared in my head. I stared up into his eyes and felt like everything around us stood still. I tried to take my eyes from his, but I was entranced-spellbound. His long fingers slowly relaxed their grip on my arms and he brought his hands down to his side, grazing my skin and sending a spark of electricity through my veins as he did. I gasped aloud as the realization hit me.

_It was him._

The eyes, the jolt of electricity that his touch sent racing through me, were identical to the hypnotic man from the Kodak Theatre two weeks ago. My body responded to him now just as it had then. How could I have missed this? I'd looked at his picture on the front of the magazine for days, trying to figure out why those eyes looked so familiar, only to come up blank. And yesterday, his touch sent the same current flowing through me; I'd just been too nervous to see it.

"It was you," I whispered.

His eyes widened for a brief moment, revealing the emotion smoldering in them, before he quickly locked it down and looked at me blankly.

He nodded his head minutely. "It was," he said simply, stepping away from me and clearing his throat. "Gianna's in the office over there." He pointed to a door on the other side of the room. "I'll see you later."

He hastily left the room, leaving my head spinning in his wake. I felt like such a fool for pointing out such a simple interaction between the two of us, like it was the most important event in history. Of course it meant nothing to him. I was just a girl that ran into him on the street and by some strange coincidence, happened to show up for an interview two weeks later.

I scrubbed my face with my hands and took a deep, cleansing breath, repeating the exact same thing I'd thought two nights ago.

I was totally fucked.

* * *

_Thump... Thump... Thump... Thump._

I groaned and put the pillow over my head, squeezing my eyes closed, and tried to ignore the sounds of Emmett and Rosalie screwing in the other room. I didn't need this shit.

Unfortunately, they seemed to get even louder. And my bed was shaking in time with the thumps.

_How was that possible?_

I growled in frustration and flung myself out of the bed. All I wanted was a freaking nap before I was dragged out of the house and forced to tag along while we went out with Emmett.

I went over to Rosalie's door and stood there, crossing my arms over my chest and tapping my foot impatiently on the floor.

I had too much on my mind to deal with this today.

I'd been training with Gianna the last week, getting a feel for Edward's daily routine and running errands for him in between classes. Yesterday, we switched places. I was in charge of taking his Blackberry and answering the phone all weekend long, relaying messages by text-I was too chicken shit to call him-and scheduling appointments. I hadn't spoken a single word to Edward Masen outside of "hello" since the incident in his den on Tuesday.

It was now Saturday.

He was avoiding me, that much was certain. I was almost to the point to quitting the job already. Between his obvious distaste for all things Bella and the insane drive I had to fuck him senseless, I was going to lose my mind soon if I wasn't careful. It was pure torture to be in such close proximity to him and know he wanted nothing to do with me. There was only one thing that comforted me: the fact that in five days, I hadn't seen him bring home a single woman, even though he was pictured with one earlier in the week.

I wasn't sure I'd be able to handle it when he did.

The annoying thumping finally stopped and was followed by shuffling before the door opened, and I came face to face with the massive man that was Emmett McCarty.

He grinned widely, flashing me his white teeth and his dimples, while his dark blue eyes looked me over in amusement. He scratched the top of his head, messing up his black curls, before crossing his massive arms over his chest and mirroring my pose.

"Is there something I can help you with?"

"Yeah, jackass. You can quit screwing my roommate when I'm in the apartment. It's bad enough I have to hear what goes on in here, but today, you managed to make my whole bed shake in time with your... thrusts." I cringed with the last word.

"Jealous?" he asked, cocking his brow.

"NO!" I screeched.

"I think you are." He slung me over his shoulder and carried me across the room before he threw me down on the couch. I screamed and punched and kicked at him, but it was useless.

"Oof," I uttered as I landed. "That was completely unnecessary, Emmett."

He merely shrugged. "If I promise not to fuck Rosie in the apartment for a week, will you get drunk with me tonight?"

I bit my lip. The man drove a hard bargain.

"You know how I hate to get drunk..." I let the statement hang in the air.

"Two weeks. Always at my place." He looked at me pleadingly. "Come on! You don't always have to be sober bitch."

"Not drunk. Just buzzed. And you have to move my bed away from the wall," I countered.

"Deal." He grinned. "This is going to be great!"

I rolled my eyes. "Whatever. You get way too much enjoyment out of seeing me inebriated."

He pinched my cheek. "Because you're so cute when you're drunk. All pissy like a little kitten."

Rosalie came walking in the room, fresh out of the shower. "Leave her alone, babe. She's got to get in the shower now."

My brows furrowed. "What? Why? I'm going in this." I pointed to my jeans and white ribbed tank top.

"Oh, no you're not," she said with a laugh. "They won't let you in like that."

_Damn._

We got ready to go, and I left the apartment with them, tugging on the hem of my dress the entire time. Rosalie laughed at my lack of comfort and being the lady that I am, I gave her the finger.

We got there and Emmett flagged some blond haired guy that looked like he should be in an Ralph Lauren ad-and not in a good way. He was too put together, too prissy-he was even wearing a pink shirt. Emmett brought the blond guy over with him, smiling mischievously.

_No. No, no, no._

It suddenly dawned on me they were setting me up. Again. Even though they promised after the last disaster to never do it again.

In the last six months Rosalie and Emmett had been determined to find me a "man", setting me up with every guy they knew. Each time gradually worsened. The last guy they'd set me up with was so self absorbed, he barely let me speak five words the entire date and had ordered everything for me, without even asking what I wanted. When he finally checked his appearance with the reflection from his spoon, I got up and left.

And now, I was looking at the poster boy for metrosexuals everywhere.

_Oh, goody._

"Judas!" I shouted at Emmett as he came over to me. "And you!" I pointed at Rosie. "You're just as bad! You promised me!"

"I know, Bella. But he's a really nice guy, I swear. Just be nice. Please?" she begged.

"Fine, " I grumbled.

"Bella, this is my Chem lab partner, Mike Newton. Mike, this is Bella Swan. The girl I was telling you about." Emmett looked at us expectantly.

"Nice to meet you," I said politely.

"You weren't kidding! She's gorgeous," Mike said excitedly.

Where were his manners? No "Hello, nice to meet you , too"?

Emmett just grinned.

"Let's go in and get a drink, guys," Rosalie said, taking Emmett's hand and leading us inside.

True to her word, Rosalie bypassed the line and sweet talked her way in without a bit of trouble. As soon as we were inside, I went straight to the bar and ordered a shot of Patron. I threw it back, wincing at the burn as it slid down my throat, and ordered another one-repeating the process.

_There. I filled my quota._

"Wow. Are you trying to get drunk?" Mike asked, holding a bottle of Coors Light. His blue eyes looked me over.

"No. Just promised Emmett I'd get buzzed tonight. Shouldn't be long now." I flagged the bartender down and ordered an apple martini. "So what are you majoring in?"

"Civil Engineering, just like Emmett," he answered.

"Nice." I took a sip of my drink.

"What about you?"

"English."

We stood there awkwardly, unsure of what else to say to one another. I looked around the crowed room and saw Emmett and Rosalie making out under the blue lights, leaving me to Mike Newton on my own.

I stirred my martini and started to feel the heat from the alcohol spread through my body and the sluggishness that accompanied it.

"So. Mike. Why the pink shirt?"

He shrugged and smiled at me good-naturedly. "I'm confident enough in my masculinity to wear one. I also have a pair of pink pants."

"What the fuck? Why?"

"Why not?" he countered with a grin.

"Are you gay?"

_Please tell me they did not set me up with a gay guy._

He laughed. "No. I wore them for a golf tournament my fraternity was in."

"Oh."

"I'll be right back," Mike said, looking around the room. "I need to find the bathroom."

"Good luck with that."

As soon as he walked away, I put my head in my hands and groaned. He was definitely not my type. He was short, his hair was in neat, gelled spikes, his shirt was perfectly ironed-even his jeans looked ironed. I couldn't understand why Emmett and Rosalie would think I'd like this guy. Didn't they know me at all? I went for tall guys, ripped with lean muscle. With green eyes and coppery brown hair...

_Stop it, Bella._

I felt a warm hand clasp my shoulder, and I went rigid with aggravation.

"No," I said, never turning around.

I heard a familiar, velvet chuckle in my ear. "Is that any way to greet your boss, Isabella?"

_Ah, hell._

* * *

**Edward**

I kept my distance from Isabella all week after her insight on Tuesday. I didn't want her to read too much into the situation and frighten her away, even if it did appear that I was stalking her. Because no matter how infatuated I was with her, she had the potential to be an excellent assistant; I didn't want to lose her before she even began.

I blatantly refused to call her Bella, instead opting for the more formal Isabella when I addressed her-like I had drawn some sort of line and by not calling her Bella, I would stay on the correct side, even though I was dangerously close to crossing it.

Every day, I greeted her politely and then retreated to the gym in my basement so that I could work off my sexual frustrations. But no matter how long or how hard I worked myself, every day her beautiful laughter would filter through the house, or I'd catch sight of her enchanting smile when answering the phone and I'd almost lose my control. I longed to tell her that I found her blush and her clumsiness utterly endearing and that I couldn't stand to see her in those tight-fitting trousers and shirts; I wanted nothing more than to rip them off with my teeth and devour her.

I couldn't seem to shake myself of the thoughts surrounding Isabella's flawless form. I wanted to see what lied underneath the clothes. I wanted to know what it felt like to have her breasts in my hand or know what it was like to lick a trail up her long, graceful neck...

I slammed the script closed and shut my eyes. I normally had no problems memorizing my lines, but tonight, I couldn't stay focused. My mind kept drifting back to Isabella. It had been so long since I'd felt like this about anyone-no, I'd never felt this way about anyone. It was encompassing, all-consuming. Almost as if I was in love.

_How can you love someone you don't even know?_

_You can't_, was the answer I instantly thought of. Which made me wonder, if I got to know Isabella, would my feelings change? Would she become to me what she should be-my assistant? Or would my feelings grow?

I couldn't take the chance... Could I?

My mobile rang abruptly on the table, leaving me to postpone my inner debate to a later date. I looked down at the ID and frowned. It was Royce King-my agent.

"Yeah?"

"Where are you, Masen?" I could hear loud music playing in the background, reminding me that I was to play the part tonight with Royce at some of the local clubs and bars.

"Sorry. I completely forgot. Where are you now?"

"We're at Area. We just got here. We'll be outside. Hurry up."

I quickly changed into a pair of black trousers and a black button down, rolling my sleeves up to my elbows before I ran my hands through my untamable hair. I had been so wrapped up in Isabella this week, I'd forgotten that Royce had set up a night of publicity with my newest costars, Tanya Denali and Jacob Black-both of whom I loathed.

I was going to have to get a handle on myself.

I pulled up to the club and gave the valet the keys to my Aston Martin. I heard the screams of the people standing in line as they recognized me. I walked over and signed a few autographs, smiling and waving the entire time, before heading inside.

I got inside and looked around the club disdainfully. I hated this part of the job. I loved to act; I loved the theatre and the lights, the cameras, the action behind the scenes-all the preparation it took to set up and film a mere five minutes. I loved being able to shut off myself and become someone else. I adored the fans, the people who made my career what it is today. I didn't even mind the press; it was part of the job. But this-pretending to be something I'm not-could sometimes be onerous. I didn't mind the image, per se. I understood that it was part of the "package" that was Edward Masen. The cocky smile, the sexy swagger, and the supposed women were what kept women hopeful and men interested-even if it was only with revulsion.

But I was getting too old for this. I was no longer a man trying to finish my last year of university, who just so happened to be discovered during a theatre class one day. I made my first film when I was twenty-three. One would think that by now my agent, manager, and publicist would want to revamp my image, instead of consistently portraying me as the partying playboy.

It was quite absurd really-absolute rubbish. Was I honestly expected to be a bachelor until the day I died? Before I got into the world of fandom, I was _that_ bloke. I wanted to find the girl, get married, and raise a family. I gave it up willingly, thinking that it would only last throughout my twenties and then I would be able to be myself again-publicly and privately. I knew that if I met _her_, right now-today-I would give it all up in an instant because somewhere inside me, I was still him.

Some strange nagging sensation at the back of my brain led me to believe that I might have already met her.

_Isabella._

I scanned the crowd again and stopped suddenly at the bar. There she was, standing next to a blond haired nancy boy in a pink shirt. She looked absolutely stunning in a fitted blue dress that accentuated her rich, creamy skin. Her hair was in loose curls and her cheeks were colored a pale, delicate pink from the alcohol that instantly made me hard.

She was the only one to ever cause that reaction from me with just the pooling of her blood under her skin.

I watched the interaction between the two of them, ignoring everyone around me, and noticed she looked absolutely miserable. I almost brushed past her, intent on keeping the distance I'd fought so hard to maintain all week, but as soon as she was alone, I found myself walking over to her-drawn in to her like a moth by a flame. I was suddenly determined to bring a smile to that sultry mouth of hers.

I put my hand on her shoulder and she instantly stiffened at my touch. "No," she said in annoyance.

A light chuckle escaped my throat. "Is that any way to greet your boss, Isabella?" I whispered in her ear, catching a whiff of her dreamy, floral scent. I wanted to run my nose across her skin and drink in her body's incredible perfume.

She spun around and looked horrified. "Oh, my God. I'm so sorry. I thought you were someone getting ready to hit on me."

I smiled warmly at her, masking the jealously that raged through me. "Has that been a problem tonight?"

"No," she said sheepishly. "But Mike just walked away, so I thought someone would try to take advantage of me being alone. They usually do."

"Mike?" I questioned, focusing on keeping my face blank.

"My date."

I took a step back and ran my hand through my hair. "I didn't know you were on a date. I'm sorry to have intruded. I'll see you Monday."

I turned around and started to move away from her, mentally bashing myself for being such a twit, when I felt a soft, warm hand grasp mine, sending waves of electricity through my arm. I looked back to Isabella slowly and saw her biting her lip nervously-which did nothing to help the situation in my trousers.

"Please don't go," she said with an intense blush, nearly bringing me to my knees. "My friends set me up and it's-"

"Awkward?" I interjected. She nodded. I didn't stop the urge to brush my thumb across her cheek, causing it to tingle warmly at the contact. "I won't leave you," I promised, making her beautiful brown eyes widen slightly. "Would you like to come outside with me? No one will bother us there." The words were out of my mouth before I could stop them.

"Yes," she mouthed.

"Bella?" We both looked in the direction of the voice to see Mike looking down at our still joined hands in disbelief. I abruptly loosened my hold and dropped my hand, feeling the loss instantly. "You know Edward Masen?"

"Um, yeah," she said uncomfortably. "He's my boss."

Mike's eyebrows shot up, and he looked between the two of us, like he was trying to find the missing piece of a puzzle.

"I was just leading Isabella outside for some air and some privacy," I said amiably. "We were going to look for you and..." I looked at Isabella to finish.

"Rose and Emmett," she said, arching her brow at me.

I shrugged one shoulder at her. "Shall we?"

I led them toward the patio, and Isabella stopped me when we walked by a tall blond and a bloke that looked like he'd taken one too many steroids, whom I assumed were Rosalie and Emmett. Isabella introduced us, while the blond looked disgustedly at me and then rolled her eyes, stomping behind Isabella and the burly man as we continued to walk towards the door.

"Edward Masen!" I looked over to see a group of women screeching at me.

I waved and gave them a tight-lipped smile, never stopping, but they rushed over to me.

"We just love your movies," one of them said.

"Thank you," I said politely. I flagged one of the waitresses down. "Get them a bottle of whatever they want and put it on my tab, please."

They giggled and went back to their table when I noticed Rosalie was giving me that disgusted look again.

"Are you expecting to get in their pants now, Masen?" she sneered.

I laughed. "No. I was merely trying to get them to leave us alone. It worked, didn't it?"

"Masen! That new movie was the shit! The effects were awesome!" I looked over to see a strange man rushing over to us, swiping his drink from the waitress as she brought it over to him. "Here, on me!"

"Thanks, mate," I said, holding the drink up. "I'm glad you liked the film."

I walked a few feet away and put the drink down on a nearby table.

"You're not going to drink that?" Isabella asked in confusion.

"I may accept a drink from a fan, but I never actually taste it. No matter what."

"Very smart," Isabella complimented.

I flashed her a smile. "Thank you."

We finally made it outside, and I saw Royce sitting in one of the private areas with Tanya and Jacob.

"Royce," I greeted as we walked up. "Tanya, Jacob. It's nice to see you again."

"Who're your friends Edward?" Tanya asked, running her fingers through her reddish-blond curls.

"This is my new PA, Isabella Swan, and these are her friends Rosalie Hale, Emmett McCarty, and Mike," I thought for a moment. "I'm sorry, Mike. I don't believe I caught your last name."

"Newton," he said crossly.

Obviously Mike Newton was not a fan of mine.

"It's nice to meet you," Tanya said insincerely. I looked at Isabella and rolled my eyes causing her to giggle softly.

We sat down and began chatting about nothing. Eventually, I leaned back in my seat and just watched. Royce looked to be enamored with Rosalie, flirting with her shamelessly while Emmett talked to Mike about an lab experiment gone horribly awry a few days ago. Tanya toyed with her hair and played with her nails, occasionally sipping on her glass of champagne. She had to be the most self-absorbed person I'd ever met in my life. Jacob was listening to Isabella talk enthusiastically, almost like he was genuinely interested, but I knew better. He would openly leer at her when she wasn't looking, shifting his tall body so that he could get a better view down her dress.

I wanted nothing more than to reach across the table and throttle him for even entertaining the idea of shagging my Isabella.

_Where the bloody hell did that come from?_

I shook off the odd possessive feelings and saw the waitress come over with our drink refills. I took my glass and drank deeply, drinking almost half the liquid in one large gulp.

Isabella looked at me in shock. "Thirsty much?"

I nodded and grinned crookedly at her. "Can you keep a secret?" I asked lowly, leaning in to her.

"Yes," she said breathlessly.

"It's only water." Her eyes grew even larger. "It looks like a vodka water, but it's not."

"Why?"

"I don't need all the trouble that comes with being pissed in public." I smiled broadly at her. "Want to hear another secret?" She nodded, seemingly dazed. "When I leave here, I'll be taking Tanya home with me. Or so everyone will think."

"What?" She came out of her trance.

"The studio wants us to look like a couple, even though I can't stand her. I'll have the car brought around front and she'll be photographed getting inside. The press makes the assumption that I'm taking her home with me, but in reality, I'm taking her home and then going back to my house. Alone." I brushed the hair away from her face. "Like I always do."

"You do." She looked at me suspiciously.

"I do," I said with a nod. "I told you there were a quite a few things about me you wouldn't know." I touched the tip of her nose with my finger.

"Edward," Tanya interrupted. "I'm ready to go home," she pouted.

I sighed and moved away from Isabella. "All right. Let's go then."

I got up and looked at Isabella as I moved closer to Tanya and winked at her just before I threw my arm around Tanya's shoulders and nuzzled her neck.

Tanya huffed loudly and swatted me away. "Not yet, you moron."

I cast one last glance at Isabella. "I'll see you Monday." I smirked.

Monday I would be forced to keep my distance from her again. I'd let myself get much too close to her tonight.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for the reviews!!! I'm getting pretty excited about the reaction I've gotten to this story! You guys rock ;)**

**I'm doing a collab and a one-shot for the Countdown to Christmas--Have Yourself A Smutty Little Christmas (the name says it all, hehe). It starts posting Dec 1st and will be 24 days of lemony goodness. The intro's already been posted. If you're interested, add it to your alerts. **

**Here's the link: http://www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/5477548/1/**

* * *

Chapter 3

**Bella**

_Who...What... I...?_

_What the fuck was that?_

Edward left with Tanya, leaving me mentally sputtering behind him. His scent, his voice, and his smile left me befuddled, lightheaded. My head was spinning, my heart was reeling with his complete turn towards me. He didn't treat me like he had all week long--like a pariah--but instead was affectionate and charming. His bright green eyes held so much there, so much promise, almost--quite absurdly--as if he _wanted_ me.

He was so open, explaining how everything was just for show, that the man behind the image was nothing at all like I'd been expecting--a thought that was entirely too intriguing. I needed to know more about him, to learn what made him tick and what was in his heart. I'd only been given a glimpse of who Edward Masen truly was, and I was left desperate for more.

_What the hell is wrong with you?_

I couldn't become infatuated with him. He was my boss and even though I hated to admit it, I needed this job. I couldn't afford to screw it up with the romantic fantasy that was now seemingly embedded in my brain. That Edward Masen-- confirmed, charismatic bachelor Edward Masen--would fall in love with me and sweep me off my feet in a whirlwind of sex and romance in a world where we lived happily ever after.

My God, I've lost my mind. I didn't believe in fairy tales, not anymore. Not since I was a little girl. I believed in reality, in the world we lived in where marriages don't work out and children get burned in the process. I was a walking contradiction and was completely satisfied with that. I wanted the serious relationship, the one person I could call mine. Yet I didn't believe in marriage and soul mates and babies and the nonexistent happily ever after. Even though I'd never felt it myself, I believed in love. But it had been my experience that love didn't always last a lifetime.

So why was I suddenly picturing little red-headed babies running at my feet and a ring on my finger? _My_ little red-headed babies. More importantly, _Edward's_ and my red-headed babies--a vision that left my heart fluttering uselessly in my chest and my veins running cold with fear.

_Fucking hell._

Rosalie's snide voice interrupted my chaotic inner rambling. "Thank fucking God the cad left the table."

My eyes widened in shock momentarily before the anger that fizzled and popped beneath my skin took over, narrowing them instead.

"What the fuck, Rose?" I asked irately. "That's my _boss_! You can't say shit like that about my boss!"

Emmett stopped talking to Mike and grinned gleefully at me. "Oh, please, Bella," Rosalie said, waving me off. "He's going home with Tanya Denali to fuck her. It's pathetic he flaunts his good looks and fame so that he can have a different girl in his bed every night."

"That's a bit like the kettle calling the pot black, don't you think?" I bit back.

Rosalie's eyes flashed indignantly over her glass. "What do you mean?"

"What do I mean?" I asked, standing up. "I mean, you've sat here the entire night and let this skeezeball," I shot a glance at Royce, "hit on you in front of Emmett the entire night, completely unashamed by using your good looks to your advantage. You string men along everywhere we go to get free drinks and 'perks' as you put it without a second thought. The result may not be the same, but you are no different."

"I'm not a slut," she argued. "Edward Masen is a manwhore, plain and simple.

I grabbed my bag and got ready to leave. "You don't know anything about him."

"And you do?" she asked nastily, finally realizing it wasn't just the alcohol in my blood talking.

"I know a bit more than you. And it's enough to know that you're making an extremely rude and biased judgment of a man you don't even know. And why? Why does it matter what Edward Masen does in his free time? He's not hurting anyone. Least of all you, since you claim to be so in love with Emmett. What's your real problem with him, Rose?"

Her mouth gaped slightly before she quickly snapped it shut. "I don't have to ex-"

I cut her off. "It doesn't matter." I glared at Emmett, who was watching the scene play out in front of him like someone seeing their favorite movie for the first time. All he needed was a bucket of popcorn. "Enjoy the show?" I asked him. "Cause now it's over. I'm going home. And make sure you take her with you. I want to be alone tonight."

I plastered a smile on my face and apologized to everyone else at the table, then I stalked out of the club--part angry, part guilty--and pulled out my cell phone to call a cab. I had barely gotten out of the door before I heard a deep, husky voice call my name behind me.

I turned around to see Jacob smiling broadly at me. "That was something else. Very eloquently put."

"Thanks. Only two curse words. Yay me," I said dryly.

"Do you have a swearing problem?" he asked, still grinning.

"Yep. When I get flustered or angry, it usually comes flowing out of me like a sailor." I started to dial for a cab company.

"I'll take you home," he said, taking the phone from my hand.

"Jacob, I appreciate it but I don't think-"

He squeezed my lips with his fingers, abruptly stopping anything else from coming out of my mouth. "Bella, I like you. And Edward is completely smitten with you. It's the least I can do."

He released my lips to give the valet his ticket. "Edward is not smitten with me," I scoffed. "And who says 'smitten' anyway?"

"I do. And yes, he is. Just like you are with him." I blinked in shock, making him laugh. "I may not be on the best of terms with Edward, but I'm not going to leave you out here alone. He'd kill me."

"What do you mean, 'on the best of terms'?" I inquired.

"The old bastard is still constantly getting all the good roles. He beats me every time. Pisses the hell out of me. So I may unnecessarily be a dick to him." He shrugged. "But he's gotten to where he is by hard work and dedication instead of being underhanded like most people in the business. I may not like him, but I have to respect him for that."

"Seems like a pretty shallow reason not to like him."

His lips twitched. "I never said I was a deep guy, Bella. I'm an actor. We're typically very vain. You just happened to land a job for one who's not." The valet pulled a sparkly red Camaro to the curb. "Hop in," he said, smiling lightly.

I got in and admired the flawless interior. I didn't know much about cars--that was more Rosalie's domain--but I knew this had taken a lot of time and money to restore to this condition.

"Nice car," I said honestly.

"Thanks. I rebuild cars in my spare time. Took me over a year to get her looking like this."

I nodded. "What year is it?" I didn't care, but it took my mind off the heavy feeling of guilt I felt for fighting with Rosalie.

"Sixty-seven," he said proudly. "The first year they made these."

"That's nice." I paused. "Edward's not old," I blurted suddenly.

He chuckled. "Okay. Nice segue there, Bella."

"Sorry," I said, my face burning with embarrassment.

"No, I guess he's not old. But he's a lot older than us. Where am I taking you anyway?"

I gave him my address. "How old are you?"

"Twenty-two. You?" He glanced sideways at me.

"Twenty-one."

The conversation lulled for a while before Jacob spoke up again. "I guess it's a good thing you don't think Edward's old. Something like that might put a pretty big damper on the relationship."

"There's nothing going on. He's just my boss," I said, trying to keep the disappointment out of my voice.

"Sure he is. That's why you practically ripped your best friend's throat out back there defending him." He gave me a playful smile.

"There's not anything between us," I said, scowling.

"But you wish there was."

_Was I that transparent?_

"No," I argued, "I don't.

"Okay," he laughed. "If you don't have anything going on with Edward and you don't _want_ anything with Edward, prove it."

"How?" I asked in confusion.

"Go out with me next weekend."

_Oh, hell no._

I couldn't go out with Jacob Black. I didn't want to go out with him. There was no connection here other than the fact that he was easy to talk to. But I liked him. He was friendly and nice--I didn't want to offend him.

"Jacob, you're a nice guy. And we seem to get along really well, but..."

"You're in love with Edward."

I slapped his arm. "I'm not in love with Edward."

"But you won't go out with me," he said grinning smugly.

Thankfully, we pulled into the parking lot of my apartment complex. "Thanks for the ride," I said politely, ignoring his last comment.

"You're welcome." He looked at me seriously. "You're sure you won't change your mind about the date?"

I shook my head. "No," I said softly.

"All right, but just know, the offer still stands. I think you're one of the most gorgeous women I've ever seen," he said, smiling genuinely. "Edward would have to be a moron not to want to be with you."

"Thanks," I muttered, flaming with embarrassment again.

"Anytime. I'm sure I'll see you later. Have a nice night."

"You, too."

I watched him leave and turned to walk towards my apartment, fumbling for my keys the entire way. I finally pulled them out, only to hear my cell phone chime in my bag, indicating I had a text message.

I went inside, shut and locked the door behind me, and sat my bag on the counter so I could rifle through it easier. I snatched the phone up and looked at the caller ID. It slid from my hand and fell back into my bag as my mind tried to register the fact that Edward had sent me a message at one am. Heart pounding, palms damp, I pulled the phone back out and checked the simple, cryptic message he'd sent me.

_Sleep well._

* * *

I woke up the next morning with a start. Rosalie was hovering over me, holding a mug of tea in her hand and looking... ashamed?

"Here," she said, holding the mug out like a peace offering, "it's honey and lemon. Your favorite."

I took it from her and then took a sip, closing my eyes as the hot liquid soothingly coated my throat. "Thanks," I croaked. "Have you, uh, been here all night?"

She shook her head. "Emmett dropped me off about a half an hour ago."

I nodded and took another sip, trying to figure out where to begin. Rosalie was my best friend--one of my very few friends, really. Since the day I started college, I'd taken somewhere around eighteen credit hours each semester and whatever classes were available during the summer sessions as well. If I kept up the status quo, I'd graduate in May--an entire year early. Something I was extremely proud of, given the fact that a lot of students wound up on the five year plan--and sometimes longer. The only reason I was as close to Rosalie now as I was, was because she'd shoved herself into my life freshman year during a prerequisite English Composition class. "No" was simply not an answer Rosalie Hale was willing to accept--ever.

"I'm sorry," we both exclaimed at the same time.

I laughed awkwardly. "No, really. I shouldn't have yelled at you like that. It was stupid."

"No, it wasn't," she argued, fidgeting nervously with her shirt. "I was being a complete bitch to him the whole night. And there was no reason for it."

"No?"

"Well, no good reason anyway." She looked away uncomfortably.

"What aren't you telling me?" I asked, biting my lip.

She sat silent for a few minutes before she finally sighed and began. "I was jealous of you," she admitted sheepishly.

"You? Jealous? Of me?" I asked in utter disbelief. "That's ridiculous."

"Maybe. Maybe not." Her violet eyes met mine. "You are more beautiful than you realize. I may have conventional, LA looks, but you're almost... exotic. You're small, yet curvy. And you're so pale, even though you spend a lot of time in the sun. It's a striking contrast to your dark hair and your deep brown eyes. Guys only look at me first because I put myself out there. I flaunt it, like you said." She gave me a small smile. "But last night, when you introduced us to Edward, I could have stripped naked right there in the middle of the club and he would have never looked away from you."

"Rose-" I started to object, but she stopped me. What was with everyone saying Edward was interested in me?

"Don't argue with me, Swan. I know what I'm talking about. That man was looking at you like," she trailed off, thinking about it. "Well, for lack of a better phrase, like a blind man seeing the sun for the first time. And even though I don't want him--God, I don't want him--I was jealous. Irrationally so. My whole life, I've always been the center of attention because of my looks. I guess it's made me a little self-centered. I really am sorry."

"I know. But there's no way you should ever be jealous of me. I'm not that great."

"Bella, did you not see the way Edward was with you last night? The way Jacob and Mike looked at you the entire night?" she demanded.

"I guess not," I said with a blush.

"If I didn't love you so much, I'd tell you that you're a fucking moron, a lost cause. Just be careful. Guys like him tend to hurt girls like you," she said in concern.

"He's not like that," I stated.

"He's not?"

I shook my head vehemently. "It's all for show. For his image."

"You believe that?" she asked carefully.

"Yeah." I absolutely believed him. Without a shadow of a doubt.

She nodded once. "Well, if you do, then I do. You're usually pretty perceptive." She looked at the door and then grinned at me. "Want to see what was sitting outside the door for me this morning?" she asked, waggling her eyebrows.

I laughed at her change in mood. "Sure."

She led me to the kitchen, where a huge bouquet of flowers was sitting on the counter. "Jesus. Did Em screw up or something?"

"Nope. They're from Royce," she said stoically.

I scrunched up my nose. "Ew. What the hell, Rose? Are you going to start seeing him behind Emmett's back or something? Because if you are..." I was pissed that she would even consider doing this to him.

"No, dummy. He's Royce King. You know, King Pictures? He's a walking legacy in this town. I'm trying to get an in for after I graduate. Maybe he'll convince his father to hire me to produce one of their films," she explained.

"But he's a douchebag," I countered.

"Yeah, he is," she agreed. "But most people in the business are. I've got to start networking if I want my career to go anywhere. I just have to put up with this kind of shit until I graduate and can start making a name for myself. Emmett understands."

"He does?" I asked dubiously.

"Of course. I'd never do anything to hurt him. You know that."

She was right, I did. I felt awful for even thinking she was capable of that. Rosalie was a lot of things, good and bad, but what she prided herself most on was her unwavering loyalty. She was an amazing person to have on your side.

"Yeah, I do. Sorry. It was just weird seeing you let him flirt with you while Emmett was sitting right there. I wish you would have said something."

She laughed once. "When did I have a chance?"

"You didn't."

"I don't have to look for another roommate, do I? Cause I don't want another roommate. At least, not unless it's Emmett," she laughed.

I smiled broadly. "No. I've got to go study for my test tomorrow, now. Someone took up my study time last night," I said pointedly.

"Ah, you'll ace it. You always do," she said, waving me off.

I rolled my eyes. "Blah, blah, blah..."

"Go study, Bella. Before I beat the hell out of you." She looked back at the flowers disdainfully. "I have some flowers to throw down the garbage shoot."

* * *

**Edward**

_Deep breaths, Edward. Just go in there, give her your instructions and get out._

Easier said than done.

The studio had demanded that the cast and crew of _Rogue _be in Vancouver, ready to start, on Monday, pushing the filming date up by an entire month. I now only had five days to make sure everything was taken care of here in LA before I was expected to be on location for six weeks. And after spending Saturday night with Isabella, I was more than a little reluctant to leave.

I walked in the office and saw Isabella fidgeting with her tight black dress, trying to pull it down to cover more of her incredibly sexy legs, but it kept riding up. She had a pen in her mouth as she stared studiously at the computer screen, moving it back and forth in her mouth, sucking on it and letting it clink against her teeth.

_Oh, bloody hell._

The desire I had for her electrified my blood, making it flow freely in my veins and roar loudly in my head. Every part of me wanted to stalk across the room and throw her on the desk so I could slide between her creamy thighs and...

"Hi, Edward!" she said brightly, pulling me out of my daydream.

I gave her a curt nod. "Here," I thrust the paper at her and backed away, "I have to leave this weekend to start filming. That explains everything you'll need to do to close up the Malibu house. I also need you to take a few things to the cleaner's so I can have them back in time to pack them. I'll take Samson with me, so you won't need to worry with him, but while I'm gone, you'll need to check on this house daily, get the mail, that sort of thing. I'll leave a list of things I always expected Gianna to do for me while I was on location. Erm, everything clear?" I asked, unemotionally.

Her face fell with my blasé attitude. My hand involuntarily clenched into a fist to keep from reaching out and comforting her. "Yeah," she said, her voice cracking. She cleared her throat. "How long will you be away?"

"Six weeks, more or less," I answered.

"Oh." If it was possible, she grew even more morose. My heart physically wrenched in my chest. "What about Thanksgiving?"

"American holiday. But I'll need to talk to Alice about postponing their visit now, anyways."

She nodded but looked confused. Apparently, she and Gianna hadn't discussed my family coming to visit. "When were they supposed to come?"

"In three weeks," I said with a shrug. "Mum won't be pleased, but perhaps if I tell her to come for Christmas instead it'll appease her."

"Mum?" she asked in shock. "I thought you were..."

"Oh, right." I'd forgotten she'd know the public tale of my life and not the actual one. "Technically, she's my Aunt Esme, but she and my Uncle Carlisle adopted me a year after my parents died. I've never changed my name, but I consider them my parents. Alice is their adopted daughter who I consider my baby sister. She's about your age, actually." Which made me feel even worse for wanting Isabella the way I did. "But not many people know that about me. And I prefer to keep it that way." I gave her a pointed look.

"Of course." She looked down at her hands, lost in thought. "You're nothing like I expected," she said quietly.

"No, but I suppose that's the point, isn't it?" She gave me a puzzled look. "No one is supposed to know the man behind the mask." I gave her a crooked smile. "Disappointed?"

"No, not at all," she said earnestly. As soon as the words left her mouth, her entire face flushed with embarrassment.

I merely gulped in response.

I took a deep breath and stepped further away from her. "I wasn't expected to leave for another few weeks, but the arseholes at the studio demanded we start early. I wasn't the only one who's had to rearrange their schedule. Tanya had to rearrange an entire week of press and Jacob had to cancel a visit with his sister or something along those lines." I took another step back. I needed to get away from her before I allowed her to pull me in again. "Well, I'm going to take Samson for a jog. I'll see you in a bit."

"Okay." She tugged uncomfortably on her dress again.

"You aren't expected to dress up every day," I said casually, even though I loved seeing her in a dress. "Just wear what you feel comfortable in, Isabella."

I retreated from the room without ever allowing her to say anything back. I grabbed Samson's leash and found him lying in the kitchen. I attached the leash to him and waited for him to get up, but he never moved.

"Help me out a bit here, mate. I'm dying. I've got to get away for a few minutes." I tugged gently on the leash and he reluctantly got up, stretching lazily before he shook, causing slobber to splatter across the room. "Oh, nice. Thanks," I said sarcastically.

I took him round the neighborhood twice, after spotting Isabella's car in the driveway and being unable to force myself back inside after the first lap. I finally went back inside and looked around the house, inhaling deeply as I caught my breath. I could still smell her fragrance lingering in the air, causing my chest to tighten with the emptiness I felt from no longer having her here.

Perhaps it was best I would be gone for six weeks. I could imaging things only getting worse if I continued to be around her.

I needed to clear my mind and my heart of Isabella Swan.

* * *

I didn't see much of Isabella for the rest of the week. Between her classes and my schedule, I was around her for a total of five minutes each morning before one of us had to leave. I missed her laugh, her smile, and her beautiful, brown eyes but knew it was best that I wasn't around her much before I left.

It would make leaving her that much harder.

I stood in my bedroom, folding the last of my clothes I was packing, and closed the suitcase while I watched Isabella walking around outside. I felt like a peeping tom, but I couldn't take my eyes off her. If I'd thought telling her to dress however she pleased would help curb some of the desire I had for her, I was sorely mistaken. Her tight, dark purple tank top and fitted shorts hugged her body perfectly, accentuating her delicate curves.

I finally stopped staring at her arse long enough to see that she was moving plants and flowers around outside and had a large stack of pots gathered by the gate.

Curious, I went close to the window just as she started piling pots in her small arms, trying to carry more than she was able to at once. And then all at once, everything moved in slow motion. I could see what was about to happen, but was entirely helpless to stop it.

Isabella took a few steps towards the pool just as Samson came barreling off the deck, barking and snarling at a white cat that had managed to get into the backyard. The cat weaved through Isabella's legs as it raced towards the fence, causing her to lose her footing. The pots swayed in her arms as she regained her balance, only for Samson to crash into her as he chased the cat out of the yard.

Isabella fell to the ground with the pots crashing down around her. Without thinking, I sprinted out of the bedroom and to the backyard, over to Isabella and the destroyed pottery.

"Christ, are you all right?" I asked, crouching down next to her. Samson trotted over to us, clearly satisfied he'd chased the cat away, and I pushed him angrily back. "Get back, Samson. You've done enough," I snapped. "Sit," I commanded harshly. He sat back on his haunches, whining. "Stay. Don't move until I've told you otherwise," I seethed.

I looked back at Isabella. "Are you all right?" I repeated.

"I'm fine," she mumbled, clearly embarrassed.

I frantically looked her over and saw that she was covered in superficial cuts and scrapes. "Fuck, no you're not. You're bleeding!" I impulsively scooped her up and cradled her against my body as I took her into the house. "I'm sorry, Bella. Bloody dog can't keep his paws off you." My tone was clipped.

I sat her down at one of the bar stools and went to get a cold washcloth so I could start cleaning her up. I came back over to her and noticed her eyes had widened significantly, taking on the appearance of tiny round saucers in her face.

"What?" I asked as I gently pressed the washcloth to the cuts on her calf.

"You... you," she swallowed loudly, "you said my name."

I laughed once, a nervous sound. "I always say your name."

"No, I mean you called me Bella. Usually you just say Isabella. But out there..." she trailed off shyly.

"That's rubbish. I called you..." I suddenly realized she was right. I'd called her "Bella", like it was the most natural thing to do. "Oh." I took a deep breath and focused on cleaning her up. "I really am sorry. It seems I'm going to have to take Samson back to obedience school."

I moved to her other leg and began dabbing the washcloth on her cuts, careful not to hurt her. I worked my way slowly up her leg, completely entranced by how incredibly soft her skin was and the floral scent that seemed to surround me. I moved up to her inner thigh and could think of nothing else but what was under her shorts, if the skin there was softer, silkier. What it would be like to taste every inch of her.

Finally satisfied that I'd cleaned her legs up as good as I could, I went to work on her arms, but was stopped short at the sight of her brown eyes staring down at me. They were so much darker than they usually were, swirling with emotion and pulling me into her with some sort of gravitational force. I unconsciously licked my lips as I continued to helplessly stare into those chocolate brown orbs. A delicate pink tinged her cheeks, causing my breathing to become ragged. I felt as if I had a million bees buzzing inside my head and my heart was going to beat out of my chest within seconds; I was unable to focus on anything but Isabella.

I put the washcloth down and slowly stood up, swallowing hard. My hand skimmed the side of her face and she leaned into it, sighing softly.

"I, uh..." I couldn't focus on anything but her. "What, uh, what were we talking about?"

"Dog. Obedience school," she said distractedly.

I watched her plump pink lips move as she spoke and leaned in. My fingers brushed along her wrist, feeling her pulse jump erratically under the skin. A slow smile spread across my face as I realized that I had the exact same affect on her as she had on me.

I leaned closer to her, close enough to feel her breath fan across my face. "Right. He needs to go back," I whispered.

"I think it's just me," she said breathlessly. I gave her a strange look. "He's still sitting there."

I glanced outside to see Samson still sitting in the same place I'd left him. "Good. What were you doing out there?"

"I knew you wanted to put more plants and stuff out back and I thought I'd try to get it done before you left so if you didn't like it, I could fix it while you were gone," she said shakily.

I smiled affectionately at her. "That what gardeners are for, love." I looked down at those enticing lips again. "Bella," I said deliberately and heard her breath hitch in her throat, "God, I need to..."

I didn't bother finishing my sentence and closed the distance between us, my eyes never leaving hers. The blood roared in my veins, demanding me to taste, to take. I used every ounce of willpower I had to move in gradually, giving Isabella the chance to turn away if she didn't want it. But she didn't turn away. Slowly, excruciatingly, I tilted my head so that I could kiss her properly.

And was interrupted by the fekking phone.

I instantly launched myself across the room, raking my hands through my hair as I realized what I'd almost done. I grabbed my keys off the counter and started out the door, not glancing once at Isabella as I made my cowardly escape.

I drove--just drove--for hours, watching the sun fade behind the horizon and the sky turn to black. I parked in a parking garage and grabbed a hooded sweatshirt, throwing it on haphazardly and pulling the hood over my face.

I walked around, staring at the ground, uncertain of where I was going until I got there. Without even looking up I knew where I was. I could feel it as every part of me ached and yearned for Isabella.

I was back where it started. Where I'd first laid eyes on her and felt the first stirring in my deadened heart.

The Kodak Theatre.

* * *

**Yeah, I know. Edward's a pain in the ass ;)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks for the reviews! This chapter's been done for a few days but I was out of town over the weekend and I hear that FF wasn't working anyway, so hopefully all the kinks have been gotten out.**

**Oh, and the age difference...um, it's 17 yrs...for a reason...Twilight, etc...you get the pic ;)**

**Sorry peeps, E & B still haven't gotten their shit together, for those of you who are ready for them to just get over it already. But the drama won't last forever. It's a romance for a reason!**

* * *

Chapter 4

**Edward**

I found an empty bench and sat down, staring out into the road, as I tried to get a hold on the frenzy of thoughts and feelings that were racing through me.

I wanted to be with her--desperately. I wanted to stop thinking of her as my assistant, Isabella, and start thinking of her as my girlfriend, Bella. I wanted to cross that ridiculous line I'd drawn for myself. And it wasn't like I thought I'd be rejected. I knew she wanted me just as I wanted her. The natural chemistry that flowed between us was too impossible to deny. I wanted to learn everything about her, from her favorite color to the stories behind any scar she had on her body from childhood. I'd even want to meet her bloody parents and watch their eyes pop out with shock as their daughter introduced them to her thirty-eight-year-old boyfriend.

But there were so many things that could go wrong. She was my assistant; I was her boss. If it didn't work out, I'd be on the hunt for another assistant, a headache I was not interested in getting again. She was a still a student--seventeen years younger than me. If the press got wind of that, they'd have a field day with the scandalous relationship of Edward Masen and Bella Swan. She would be assaulted by the ruthless paparazzi until they found something more noteworthy to exploit. Then there was my job itself. The constant travel--filming a picture, then promoting the picture. I was home only six months out of the year and barely even had time to see my family, much less have some sort of relationship. I had no doubt I'd give it up for her, to be with her, but there were contractual requirements I was obligated to fulfill before I could even think about retirement. It would take almost a year before I'd be free of the entertainment industry if I chose not to start another project after _Rogue._

There was a strange, sick feeling in my stomach with the thought of Bella and me being followed by photographers when I took her out to dinner; I instinctually knew she wouldn't want it--any of it. And neither did I.

I hung my head in my hands.

This was just brilliant. There was nothing I could do. I could be infatuated and love her from afar--because I knew that's exactly where I was headed with this--but because of my career, I couldn't have her. At least, not now. And who was to say that when May came and she graduated, she would still want me or would even continue to work for me.

I was putting entirely too much thought into this. Something so strong, so compelling, shouldn't be fought against every step of the way. I should just let things happen naturally and quit being such a twit.

Which I was going to start doing right now. No more running, no more hiding. As soon as I got back from Vancouver, I would find a way to make it up to her--even if it was in a platonic way.

I quit wallowing in my sorrows and went back to my car. I drove back to my house and went to let Samson in but found that Isabella had already let him in the house when he met me at the door.

I affectionately rubbed his ears. "Sorry, boy, but you can't keep knocking Isabella over like that. You're bound to break her arm if you keep it up." He groaned softly and stood on his hind legs, resting his paws on my chest and licking my face in apology. "All right, I get it. You're sorry, also. Now, get down, and I'll get you something to eat."

I dumped a few cups of food into his bowl and then went to clean up the mess, thinking of how it would very much resemble the current relationship status I held with Isabella because of my idiocy.

Shattered.

I went to grab the dustpan and the broom and found they weren't there. Confused, I went outside and saw Isabella sweeping up the pieces of pottery, standing under the soft glow of the lights and facing away from me. I stood there, baffled, as I watched her, completely surprised to find her still here hours later until I heard the sound that caused a fissure to split my heart into uneven pieces.

Her cry.

I rushed over to her and gently laid my hand on her arm, ignoring that pleasant jolt that went through my system as I did.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

She huffed out a breath. "Right," she muttered.

"I am," I insisted. "So very sorry. Please don't cry. I didn't mean to hurt you."

She pulled away from me and started sweeping again. "Fine. Whatever."

"Bella, please stop. I can get this."

She spun around and looked at me with a fierce expression. "All right. I'll just be going then." She shoved the broom in my hands and started to walk away.

I grabbed her arm and pulled her back. "Don't go. Not like this."

"Why does it matter how I leave, Edward? I'm just your assistant," she asked heatedly. "What do you want from me?"

"Bella, I-"

"Stop calling me that!" she screeched. "You don't have the right to call me that! One minute, you're charming and polite and the next minute you're cold and distant. One day you touch me and the next day you don't even look at me. And then tonight you almost kissed me and once your realized what almost happened, you ran, like it was the worst possible thing for you to do. If I'm that revolting, why even bother?"

Infuriated that she could possibly think I would purposely do this to her, I started to object, but she completely took me off guard when she took a step towards me and shoved her finger into my chest.

"Let me make it easy for you, Masen. I have spent two weeks trying to figure you out. But no more. From now on, you stay away from me. I'll do my job and you can continue to be my boss. But I'm not going to be strung along by you anymore. I'm not some love struck fan you can play head games with."

I didn't know whether to smack or kiss the sneer off her face. I was fairly certain I was leaning more towards snogging.

I took her hand away and walked forward, backing her up toward the wall. "Do you think this is easy for me? That I would intentionally lead you on?" I snarled. "You honestly think I could enjoy this, Isabella? I've known you for a measly two weeks and already, I'm falling in love with you." Her mouth dropped open as she took the last step back.

I pressed her firmly against the wall and fixed my angry gaze on her. "Is that what you wanted to hear? That I have fought this every step of the way because of all the things that could go wrong--all the things that are guaranteed to go wrong. I've felt it from the first moment I saw you on the sidewalk when you nearly plowed me down. It was one of the reasons I was compelled to hire you that day. And it has turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. You are an excellent PA, you go above and beyond what I ask of you almost every day." I pointed at the mess behind us. "Even if it doesn't always work out."

I leaned in so that our noses were almost touching and felt her chest heave with her labored breaths against mine, causing me to feel desire for her, so acute, my blood felt like hot, molten lava flowing through my veins. "But there are still things you don't know about me, about this life I live."

Her chin jutted out defiantly even though her eyes brimmed with tears and her body trembled. "Like what?"

"That I'm thirty-eight." Her eyes widened drastically. "Oh, yes. I sure you thought thirty-something meant thirty-three, thirty-four. But actually, I'd imagine I'm closer to being your parents age than I am to yours. Creeped out yet?"

I looked her over, watching her reaction unbelievably go from shock to acceptance, so I continued. "That every time I take you out, we'll be followed and swarmed with paparazzi. You'll be looked in to. We'll be quite the scandal. Almost forty-year-old Edward Masen falls for young, USC student Isabella Swan. Your life will never be the same. Not as long as you're with me. Unless of course, I hide you in the house like I'm ashamed of you. Take your pick. Either way, it's a far cry from any form of normal," I said passionately. "So, you need to think this through before you tell me whether or not you want to be with me as well. Because once we finally give in to this," I motioned in between us, "there's no going back. _Ever._"

And I knew it was the truth. I knew once I gave myself to her, I would no longer be the same person I was now. There would be no turning away from her for as long as I lived.

The tears finally spilled over, running down her cheeks as the reality of what it meant to be with me came crashing down on her. "I... I... I don't know what I want," she sobbed.

I backed away and pinched the bridge of my nose with my fingers in frustration. "I didn't expect you would." I inhaled sharply. "Go home, _Bella_. I have an early flight to catch in the morning and obviously there's nothing left to say tonight. You know how to get a hold of me once you've made up your mind."

I turned away from her and focused on the scattered pieces of clay that surrounded me. "Oh, and Bella? I'm not an extremely patient man. But I'll wait as long as you need me to."

I heard her soft whimper as she walked out the door, but never looked at her. As soon as I knew she was gone, when I could no longer feel her presence, I collapsed onto the ground and stared at the sky. Only the faint buzzing sound of my mobile brought me out of the fog.

I looked down and felt a small sliver of hope run through me as I read the message from Bella.

_Let me know when you've landed so I know you're safe. Please._

There would be no sleep for me tonight.

* * *

I was a walking disaster. I'd laid my heart out to Bella, only to have to leave the next morning before I knew if my feelings were unrequited, or if she felt the same as I.

I couldn't eat, couldn't sleep. I became introverted, completely unwilling to associate with the rest of the cast and crew. I flubbed my lines, missed my marks, did everything possible to unconsciously ruin the film, and it was all because of her. Because I'd finally stopped denying myself of her, only to hear the torturous "I don't know what I want" in response.

And somehow I'd let Jacob Black talk me into playing squash with him after a long, tiring day of filming.

"Your new assistant is hot," Jacob said, swinging his racquet and launching the ball back at the wall.

"Mmm," I said vaguely. "Tell me why we're playing squash again?" I asked, listening to the satisfying sound of the ball hit the wall as it went back to Jacob.

"Because it's forty-three degrees outside, pouring down rain, and I'm a pussy?" I gave him a look. "All right, I moved to LA to get away from this type of weather. Besides, I thought you British assholes liked this kind of shit."

I rolled my eyes as we continued to volley back and forth. "If you're going to stereotype me, at least do it correctly. I don't play squash. I like football and rugby. Moron."

"Moron," he chuckled. "Is that British slang?"

"It's a psychology term. How about eejit? Perhaps you fancy that instead?" I hit the ball with as much force as I could and watched it whizz by Jacob's head.

"Jesus, you old geezer. What the fuck is your problem today?"

I glared at him but said nothing. "Just hit the ball."

He complied, grinning smugly. "It's Bella, isn't it?" I said nothing in return, which only encouraged him further. "You are in love with that girl. Why are you being such a dumbass about her? She's obviously into you, too."

"Right," I muttered. "You can tell this how?"

"Because I asked her out and she turned me down."

"You WHAT?" I shouted, turning to him in shock. "You-"

I was cut off by the ball slamming into my cheek.

"-bastard," I continued, rubbing the spot that was now throbbing in pain.

"Ouch." He smirked. "You should keep your eye on the ball."

The possessive feelings I had at Area came flooding back to me. I wanted nothing more than to murder Jacob Black right now.

I threw the racquet across the room in anger. "Explain it to me now, Jacob. Before I mess up that pretty face of yours," I said coldly.

"All right, calm down." He twirled the racquet in his hand, and I suddenly wished I wouldn't have thrown mine across the room so I could beat him to a bloody pulp with it. "After you left Area with Tanya, Bella's friend Rosalie made some sort of comment about you and Bella flipped out."

I looked at him strangely. "What?"

"She defended your honor, so to speak. And quite well, I might add." He smiled with the memory. "Anyway, she stormed out of the club and I knew you wouldn't appreciate it if I let her find her way home alone-"

"You're damned right I wouldn't," I interrupted.

He rolled his eyes. "Yeah, so I offered to take her home and started talking to her about you. She tried to hide it, but she's in love with you." He rubbed the back of his neck with his hand. "And I honestly have no idea why. You're this pompous English jackass and are older than the fucking pyramids themselves."

"Thanks for the compliment, mongrel" I said dryly.

"See, now why do you insist on calling me a dog? I look nothing like the canine species." He motioned broadly to himself. "Girls find me hot."

"Didn't you tell me you're of Quileute descent?" I asked in irritation.

"So?"

"So I looked it up one afternoon." His mouth gaped with surprise. "Pure boredom, you see. Legend says you are the descendents of wolves. Canine. Dog. Mutt. Mongrel. Need I go on?" I gave him a smug grin. "Now continue before my mood changes, and I decide to throttle you."

"Where was I?"

"She's in love with me," I said impatiently.

"She is. She tried to deny it the entire way to her shabby little apartment, but I could see straight through her. So I thought I'd ask her out. Simply as an experiment," he hurried when he saw me grind my teeth with anger. "I think she's gorgeous, don't get me wrong. But she's not my type. There's no," he narrowed his eyes as he thought about it, "spark."

I barked out a laugh. "Spark. Wonderful." I sat down on the floor and buried my face in my hands. "God, I cocked it up. She has everything I could ever want in a woman. She's beautiful, smart, sexy, yet unintentionally innocent. She has the ability to tie my tongue in knots and cause fireworks to literally erupt inside me just from a single touch. She infuriates me to the point where I don't know whether to strangle her or kiss her, yet has the ability to make me feel so alive. And this is all that I've learned in two weeks. I really don't even know anything about the woman."

"Passion," Jacob said with a nod. "Good stuff. But why do you think you screwed up?"

"I _screwed up_ because I'd allow myself to get close to her, then I'd push her away, all because of my ridiculous mind, constantly over-thinking everything, and my self-doubt. She thought I was playing games with her."

"Thought? Past tense?" I nodded. "Well, you've been here for two weeks already. When you get back, make it up to her. Sweep her off her feet. Be romantic. Chicks dig that shit."

"Slight problem, Jacob. I told her that there was nothing more to say until she decided that she wanted to be with a thirty-eight-year-old British movie star who can't have a single ounce of privacy in his life. She'll need to be the one to make the first move after she's decided. Until then, I'll wait."

"You're thirty-eight?" he asked in disbelief. I just glared at him. "Did she think you're old?"

"No."

"Didn't think she would," he murmured. "She'll come around. You two can figure something out. I'll be surprised if you don't," he said honestly.

"Thanks, Jacob. But I still don't like you."

"That's good," he said with a grin. "Cause I don't like you either. Think you can finish the game now without trying to take off my head?"

"Probably not." But at least I felt more hopeful that things might actually work out when I got back home.

* * *

**Bella**

I was at a crossroads, stuck walking in circles at the fork in the road, unsure of which direction to choose.

After I'd pretty much been blindsided not only by the fact that Edward thought he was falling in love with me but the amount of thought he'd put into having a relationship with me, I went straight home, locked my bedroom door and buried my face in my pillow as I let the sobs rack my body. I whimpered and cried, going headfirst into the ugly cry. The snot-wiping, blotchy-faced, hiccupping cry.

It changed everything.

I'd gone from feeling the worst form of rejection imaginable when he stormed out of the kitchen, never giving me a second look, after the almost-kiss, to anger--toward Edward and myself. I was angry with Edward for toying with me, for acting like he was completely enthralled with me one day, to doing an about face and acting... Well, like my boss. I was angry with myself for allowing it to happen. For allowing him to suck me in and make me think there was a chance for an _us_. And for the annoying reaction I had to that man. He touched me, looked at me, and I lost all sense of coherency, becoming some sort of bumbling idiot.

Then, he said the words that changed it all, and I was instantly cloaked in guilt and regret for ever thinking that this was any easier for him than it was for me. He was just as confused, just as conflicted, as I was. I could hear it in his voice and see it in his eyes. And now...

I didn't know what I wanted.

_That's a lie._

I wanted Edward, but I was terrified of it. I was scared of that annoying reaction he caused in me and of the intense feelings I already had for him. If he thought he was falling in love with me, what did that mean for me? Was I falling in love with him, too? Or was I already there?

Add to that, all the issues we would have if we started dating each other. The thought of being chased by photographers everyday was appalling. If I'd wanted to be a celebrity, I'd have gone on one of those ridiculous reality shows on TV.

Like Rock of Love.

I could be just like Daisy. Then, this wouldn't be a problem.

But the other option--the hiding out and keeping things a secret option--wasn't appealing either. I wanted to be able to go to the movies, go to dinner, take walks on the beach--everything that a couple was supposed to do together.

Then, there was my job. If I chose to walk down the path that would lead me to a relationship with Edward, what would happen if things didn't work out? Could we continue to muddle through, awkwardly working with one another after the demise of said relationship? Or would he expect under no uncertain terms, for me to quit immediately? I needed to be able to pay my half of the rent. Or else I'd be forced to move back in with Reneé.

I shuddered with the thought.

Something tugged--almost pulled violently--at the back of my mind, and I was left with the strange sensation that this wouldn't end. That whatever was happening between Edward and I was binding, unchanging.

_Yeah, fucking right,_ my inner cynic muttered.

I laid there, sniffling into my pillow, and stared at my cell phone. I had the most insane urge to call Edward and apologize for everything--especially for basically calling him a cock tease.

Although, I suppose in this case he'd be, what? A kitty tease? Prankster of punany? Taunter of the vag?

_Jesus, Bella. You're ate up._

I wanted to tell him I felt the same, that I was so, terribly sorry for saying the words that I'd probably regret most in my life.

_I don't know what I want._

Because it was a straight-up, bold-faced lie. I knew what I wanted, I just didn't know how to make it work.

"Okay, enough of this shit," I mumbled.

I grabbed the phone and with great determination--

--sent him a text message asking him to tell me when he arrived safely.

_Coward._

I didn't realize I'd fallen asleep until I woke up with drool running down the side of my face and my hand still clutched around the cell phone. I took one look at it and threw it across the room. I scrubbed my eyes with my hands and thought about last night--again.

Edward was thirty-eight. Thirty-fucking-eight! But this, for some strange reason, didn't bother me.

He didn't look thirty-eight. He looked more like... thirty-two or thirty-three? The only time I saw any evidence of his age was when he smiled, causing his eyes to crinkle with slight crow's feet, and when he was in deep thought or scowling. Then, there was a tiny line that was etched in between his brows; it was there when he was angry, too.

My God, the man was phenomenal looking when he was pissed off; the way the anger sharpened his features and made him look absolutely lethal, the fire that burned behind those piercing green eyes that seemed to stare right through me, the way his entire body went rigid, his taut muscles tensing and flexing under the skin.

It suddenly got about ten degrees hotter in here.

I sat up and looked at the clock. He was gone; there was no chance for me to run and tell him my decision, even if I knew what it was.

But I had six weeks to figure it out.

I got up and managed to shut off my heart long enough to get some studying done before I grabbed some breakfast and hopped in the shower. I numbly drove out to Edward's house to get the mail out of the box and to check the e-mail account I was in charge of. There were a few random messages, mostly from companies looking to Edward to promote something, so I spouted off the necessary replies and then just sat there.

The house was empty, but I could still feel him. His scent lingered in the air so strongly, it was almost as if he was right behind me. I whirled around and then laughed at myself as soon as I saw that the office was still empty, except for me.

I was going to lose my mind.

I managed to force myself out of the chair and back out to my car, even though I wanted to stay and revel in his space, in everything that reminded me of him. It was strange, this vast emptiness I felt. Incredibly, I missed a man I didn't even know. But I was pretty damn sure I knew more about the real Edward Masen than almost anyone else already.

* * *

Weeks went by, and I slowly felt my resolve forming. My heart wanted me to choose Edward, but my mind was resolute. I couldn't do it. I wasn't ready for something so life-altering. I was perfectly content to live in my little world of denial. Maybe I was being stubborn, but I wasn't going to change my life for a man I barely knew.

But I wasn't going to be a coward about it. As soon as he came back from Vancouver, I was going to tell him exactly how I felt. I may feel the connection between us--and often wondered if it was love--but I was going to keep things as they were. And tell him there was no need to wait for me, a gesture that was in itself, incredibly romantic. Something that kept my heart screaming at my brain with its need to be with Edward.

I was gearing up for a long weekend of family visits for the Thanksgiving holiday. I was going out to eat with Reneé tonight and then catching a flight tomorrow so that I could visit my father, Charlie.

I came out of my room and found Emmett sitting on the couch, watching some football game on TV and stuffing chips in his mouth at an alarming rate.

"Don't choke yourself, you idiot," I said casually as I slipped past him and grabbed my suitcase out of the closet.

"Hey, Bella? I woke up in the middle of the night to the distinct sound of humming coming from your room," he retorted with a wicked glint in his eyes. "I'm beginning to wonder if you need to go to a sex addicts meeting or something."

My steps faltered, and I flushed bright red. I'd been pulling Old Faithful out a little more frequently than before. I took a deep breath and got the suitcase, ignoring Emmett completely as I went back to my room. If Edward Masen was starring in my fantasies a little more often than not--okay, more like religiously--why should I be ashamed? I'm sure millions of women around the world had lusty thoughts about him, too.

That got my blood boiling. My mind starting chanting "mine" over and over again, and I suddenly wanted the world to know that Edward Masen was taken and off the market for good. By me. Definitely didn't go with my "No trespassing zone" theory. The theory I'd been saying to myself over and over again since he'd left. The theory that basically stated that, as my boss and major movie star, he was off limits.

_Weird._

I got all my clothes packed for Forks before I had to take a shower. I had just enough time to get ready before I had to leave and meet Reneé at some hole-in-the-wall vegetarian restaurant in Redondo Beach. I was betting her latest fad would only last another couple of months until she found something bigger and better to move on to.

I parked and went inside, scanning the restaurant for the first sign of my mother. I finally spotted her as she grinned and waved, flailing her arm in the air excitedly like a child. I gave her a quick smile in return and started walking over to her, becoming more and more alarmed by her appearance with every step I took. It had only been a couple months since I'd seen Reneé, but she looked... different. She still resembled my mother, with her light brown hair and deep blue eyes, but there was some distinct change in her. I looked a lot like her; same pouty lips, same perky nose, same slim as a wand figure. Only I was a bit shorter and had my father's hair and eye color. And I couldn't seem to get a tan like she could.

"Hey, sis!" she said happily.

"Hi, Reneé. Um, what are you wearing?" I looked down at her. "Is that a muumuu?"

She shrugged. "It's comfortable."

"How very Mrs. Roper of you," I teased.

She managed to keep the smile off her face, even though I could see she wanted to laugh at my attempted joke. "Sit down. Order. Then we'll catch up. You never make time for me anymore."

"Sorry," I muttered guiltily, picking up my menu. "I've been busy with school and work."

"How's dog grooming?" she said with a smirk.

"I'm not doing that anymore. I told you this," I said when she looked at me blankly. "I'm working as a personal assistant now."

"Oh, right. Sorry, I forgot." She sipped her water. "Who are you working for?"

"Uh, Edward Masen," I mumbled, looking at the menu.

She squealed in delight, causing me to shrink into my chair. "Hook a girl up!"

I was speechless. First of all, by my mother's use of the word "hook" and secondly, the thought of my mother and Edward made the bile rise to the back of my throat. It was wrong on so many levels--levels I couldn't even begin to process.

"Ew, I think I just vomited in my mouth a little."

She sighed with exasperation. "Why not?'

"Well, for starters, he's my boss. And also, I don't see that happening because," I trailed off. How do I put 'because he wants to be with me" delicately?

"Ooh, you like him. Okay, he's yours. But if you change your mind..." she trailed off suggestively.

"Please stop." I took a deep breath. "What happened to the guy you were seeing? The baseball player? Phil?" Of course, the waiter chose that moment to come over and take our orders.

As soon as he was gone, Reneé answered me. "He's still around. He has to be."

"I'm not sure I understand," I said slowly. I had this sinking feeling of dread come over me. I knew I wasn't going to like what was next.

"Because, I'm pregnant," she said simply.

_Are you fucking serious?_

"Bella! Be nice!" she scolded.

My eyebrows shot up. I hadn't realized I'd said that out loud. "Sorry. I'm just extremely surprised."

"Well, it's not like I planned it. Honestly, that man can be dumber than a box of rocks sometimes. He used a condom that was expired and it broke. I-"

"No more!" I said, waving my hands wildly for her to stop. "I don't want to hear any more."

"Why not? It's not like you don't do the same thing," she pouted.

"Yes, well, I haven't in a very, very long time and I don't think discussing it with my mother is necessarily appropriate." I had to change the subject. "So when are you due?"

She shrugged. "Sometime at the end of May."

I quickly did the math in my head. "So soon? How long have you know about this?"

"Since the beginning of September." She looked away.

"And you're just now telling me? It's November! The _end_ of November!" I said indignantly.

"I'm old, Bella. I wanted to make sure I got past the first trimester before I started spreading the word," she said in a hushed tone.

"Well, you're obviously not that old," I countered.

She pursed her lips. "You're not happy about this."

"Not particularly," I agreed. "I'm twenty-one. It's crazy to me that I'm _just now_ getting a sibling."

"Bella." She looked like she was about to burst into tears.

I sighed heavily. "I'm sorry. I have a lot going on right now. But congratulations. I'm sure it will be great. A baby, yay!" I said with an attempt at a smile, only for it to be what I'm sure was a grimace instead.

She smiled back. "Thanks, sis."

Soon, that wasn't going to be just a nickname anymore, but reality.

_Damn._

* * *

**Sorry...it's Bella's turn to be a dumbass, lol. But I'm thinking there will be one more chapter and then Edward will come home...we'll see if she keeps her resolve ;)**


	5. Chapter 5

**I got two chapters knocked out last night, so I thought I'd do an early update, since I'll be busy working on my Christmas collab until Sunday--when it's due--and won't have a chance to work on anything else until then.**

**I'm seriously crossing my fingers and praying that this chapter is worth the first four chapters of angst....eeek!**

**Thanks for the reviews!!!!**

* * *

Chapter 5

**Bella**

"Reneé's pregnant."

Charlie spilled coffee down his shirt while simultaneously hacking on the sip he'd taken just before I blurted out the news.

"See? My thoughts exactly." I took a satisfied bite of my bagel.

"_How_?"

I raised my eyebrows. "Please tell me a forty-one year old man knows that certain actions of sexual nature lead to the result of a baby."

"Bella." He gave me a warning glance.

I quit covering everything up with humor and sighed. "I don't know, Dad. I wouldn't let her tell me; I didn't want to think about it. All I know is that she's due in May and it was very unplanned. But she seemed," I trailed off, thinking about it, "I don't know. Happy about it?"

"Hmm."

I saw the family photo sitting on the mantle in the living room out of the corner of my eye and looked back at the man that my mother had bolted on all those years ago, me in tow. I knew he never really got over it, though, they were such total freaking opposites I had no idea why. Certainly the town librarian would be better suited for Charlie than my mother, but what do I know? I was currently battling my own demons when it came to men, love, and relationships. I may have made up my mind about being with Edward, but my heart wasn't making it easy on me. I missed the hell out of him.

"Dad?" He looked at me expectantly. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure, Bells. What is it?"

I bit my lip, afraid to continue and then just said fuck it. "How do you feel about dating younger people? Like someone who was say, seventeen years younger than you?"

He gave me a strange look but answered me anyway. "Well, my first question is, is she blond?"

I laughed. "No. But that's exactly the image it conjures up, isn't it? The blond, money-grubbing bimbo going after an older, rich man's fortune?" He smiled and nodded. "She's... brunette."

"What does she do for a living?"

"Um, teacher. Or maybe a writer. Something along those lines."

"Then, I really don't see much of a problem with it. Unless, it was you, of course." He took a bite of his eggs.

"What? I-What?" I sputtered in confusion. "You just said it was all right!"

"Yeah, but you're my daughter. I don't want you getting involved with someone who has so little scruples to date someone so young," he said sternly.

"But, what if he didn't want to at first? What if he spent weeks trying to fight it? But couldn't? What if that was the person I was supposed to spend the rest of my life with?" I asked passionately.

His fork clattered as it hit the plate. "Who are you and where is my daughter? The one her mother and I completely ruined when we divorced?"

"Dad," I said, rolling my eyes at his clichéd reaction.

"I'm sorry, but this is really strange coming from you. You don't date, and you've made it abundantly clear that you don't want to get married. And now you're asking me about soul mates?" He got up and went to the sink to rinse his plate. "Who is he?"

"Nobody. It's not important." He craned his neck around and glared at me. "Not now anyway," I amended. "If something comes of it, I'll let you know. Hell, I'll even let you meet him before Reneé."

"Thanks, Bella." He laced his gruff voice with false sweetness.

"You're welcome, Charlie," I said with the same sugary tone. "I'm going to get ready and head out to the store. Anything particular you want for Thanksgiving tomorrow?"

"Just some more Vitamin R."

"Got it."

I ran up the steps and got in the shower, trying to ignore the annoying ache I felt in my chest, like everything had gotten stuck where my heart was; no amount of rubbing would dislodge it.

I finished getting dressed and checked the Blackberry, finding a few messages on the phone that needed to be answered before I left for the store. I got on Charlie's decrepit computer and waited impatiently as it wheezed and groaned while booting up. Finally, I could open the e-mail program, so I logged in and sent replying e-mails back to the idiot at the studio who forgot that Edward was in Vancouver for another three weeks and then went to forward the e-mail to Edward's private e-mail account. I typed in a generic message to him and then paused over the send button. Shaking my head, I deleted the message and typed in a new one, hitting send before I could change my mind.

_How are you?_

I read the message again and instantly regretted it. It was simple, and under normal circumstances, perfectly innocent. But it broke my no personal contact until he came back rule, one of the founding rules I'd come up with since he left. Apparently, I needed a lot of rules to stay away from Edward Masen--a terrible sign if there ever was one.

I got up and fought the sheets of rain that were coming down from the sky and hopped into the old, beat up Chevy Charlie kept around before I could put any more thought into it. I drove carefully to the store, making fun of myself the entire way for being such a typical Los Angelan and freaking out over rain--I'm melting and all that Wicked Witch jazz. I finally made it to the store and pulled the puttering truck into a space before braving the elements again and going inside the grocery store.

I picked up everything Charlie didn't have for tomorrow's dinner and went to the check-out counter. As I stood there, waiting in line, a DVD caught my attention at the display next to me. It was one of Edward's movies. I suddenly had the urge to see everything he'd ever been in. I needed to go to the movie store. NOW. Like a compulsion, a mental tick, that couldn't be ignored or stopped.

I tapped my foot impatiently, scanning the headlines on the magazines that were in front of me, and found one about Edward and Tanya that looked pretty interesting. Might be fairly amusing since everything was bullshit. I threw it on the belt with the rest of my stuff and watched the cashier struggle to scan each and every one of the items and then slowly bag them. I wanted to take everything and do it myself, then beat her senseless with my bag for being such a pokeass.

She finally got to the end, the magazine, and held it up with a huge smile. "They make such a cute couple, don't you think?"

"NO," I yelled, getting a questionable look in return. "Sorry, I'm in a hurry." And they didn't make a cute couple at all, but that was beside the point.

I paid and left, throwing things in the truck at random, then drove to the movie store. I ran inside and straight to the counter, slamming into it with enough force to shake everything on top of it.

"I need every single movie with Edward Masen you have," I said breathlessly to the girl behind the counter.

"Why?" The girl popped her gum in my face.

"Because I'm a paying fucking customer and I want the God damned movies," I snapped. "Please," I added nicely.

She huffed and rolled her eyes as she got off the stool and started grabbing things off the shelf. She came back with a huge stack and placed them in front of me.

"There."

I looked at her blankly. What was she waiting for? "Okay, ring them up!" I said, looking at her like she was an idiot.

"All of them?" she asked incredulously.

"I just had you get them all for me. Of course all of them! Jesus, do they not teach you anything here at all?" I retorted. She gave me a vicious glare, but I was from LA. It did nothing. "Move along!" I waved my hands, gesturing wildly for her to hurry it along. I was being a bitch, but I couldn't help it.

I snatched the bag of DVD's from her hands and raced back out to the truck, starting it up and squealing the tires as I barreled out of the parking lot. I got back to Charlie's and literally threw everything into the refrigerator and then went back into the living room to grab a DVD out of the bag.

I pulled one out and loaded it into the player, reading the case anxiously as I waited for the movie to begin.

_Winner of six Academy Awards including Best Picture and Best Actor in a Leading Role._

I stared blankly at the case. "Edward has an Oscar," I said in awe.

The movie began, and my eyes never left the screen. Edward was incredible. That was the only word I could think of to describe it. He spoke in a southern drawl that sounded so authentic and looked amazing on camera. During outdoor scenes, his hair glinted a sharp, radiating copper in the sunlight and his eyes were the color of the rolling hills he walked on. As I was watching it, the strange, clogged-up feeling in my heart seemed to displace, spreading throughout my chest in a shimmering heat while a strangled sob ripped from my throat. I had to bite down on the inside of my cheek so I didn't randomly burst into tears.

I loved him.

"Holyfuckingshit," I said in a rush. "What am I doing?"

I was sitting here, at my father's house, alone. Missing Edward. And he was in Canada, completely unaware of the change that was happening inside me. None of the bullshit reasons I'd come up with in the last three weeks mattered anymore. _Nothing_ mattered if it meant not being with him.

Before I was ready, the movie ended, and I shot up off the couch to put another one in.

"Bella?" Charlie called from the kitchen as he hung up his gun and jacket.

I ignored him, too wrapped up in Edward's role as a futuristic cop to answer.

He came into the living room and looked at the DVD's scattered all over the floor inquisitively. He picked a few up and looked through them, his eyes widening with recognition.

"Edward Masen?" he asked in shock.

"He's my boss," I answered flatly.

"He's your boss," he repeated in astonishment. "Your boss that you're in love with."

"Not love," I argued half-heartedly, never turning my attention away from the TV. I could hear the lie in my voice, but I wasn't going to admit it to anyone until I'd admitted it to Edward.

"Then what is this?" He held the DVD's up.

"Research?" It came out like a question.

"Uh-huh." He sat the DVD's down slowly. "Have fun with your research. I'm going to watch the game in my bedroom. And order some pizza."

"Which game?" I flicked my eyes to Charlie, then back to the TV.

"Whichever gets me away from this." He looked a bit scared.

"Haha," I replied sarcastically.

"Don't stay up all night."

I made it through three other movies before I fell asleep on the couch, only to be woken up by the blaringly loud chiming of my cell phone, indicating I had a text message.

I looked at the message with sleepy eyes and then looked again. And again.

"Fine?" I asked, reading the text from Edward. "What the hell does that mean?"

I typed back in confusion.

_-What?_

The answer was almost immediate.

_-I'm fine._

Oh. I stared at my phone, debating on whether I should just go to bed or continue this strange, one-worded conversation.

I went for option B.

_-I'm sorry._

_-For?_

_-Hurting you._

My phone rang abruptly in my hands, startling me to the point that I dropped it on the floor. I scrambled to answer it before it woke Charlie up and felt my heart drop into my stomach when I heard the smooth voice on the other end.

"I'm not having this conversation with you by text message," he said curtly.

Even angry, his voice took on a seductive quality, like liquid moving on glass, slow and sensual.

"I didn't really want to have it on the phone period," I retorted.

"Then I suppose I'll talk to you when I get home. I apologize for calling."

"Wait!" I pleaded. "Don't hang up."

"All right," he said slowly.

I squeezed my eyes closed and leaned my head back against the couch. "I'm sorry," I repeated.

"I got that the first time, thanks," he said dryly.

"Edward, please. Don't be such a dick. I'm... I'm trying here."

His sigh filtered over the phone. "I'm sorry. It's just been very hard for me."

"Me, too."

His velvet chuckle echoed in my ear. "That's probably the best thing I've heard in ages."

"Glad you find my dilemma amusing."

"Why does this have to be a dilemma?" he asked curiously.

"It's not anymore." I almost whispered it.

"What?" he barked out in shock.

"I'm such an idiot," I breathed. "I-"

He cut me off. "Where are you?"

"Forks," I said simply.

"Which is where exactly?" He sounded impatient.

"Not too far from Seattle. About an hour away from Port Angeles."

"Are you serious?" he asked incredulously. "That's only a five hour drive from here."

"Um, it's not as long if you take the ferries," I answered.

"Is that so," he said thoughtfully. He suddenly changed the subject. "How's your holiday?"

"Boring," I muttered.

"Boring? Why's that? Aren't you enjoying time off from work and school?" he laughed.

"No. I'm in hell," I answered stoically.

"Hell."

"Yes, hell. My personal version of hell, otherwise known as Forks, Washington."

He laughed softly. "Why is Forks hell?"

"Because I know possibly only four people here and it rains constantly. I'm bored out of my fucking mind. Oh! But I did watch some of your movies today."

"You did?" He paused. "Bella? Why do I get the impression that you've never seen one before?"

"Because I haven't," I said sheepishly.

"Blimey. Um, all right. What did you think?" he asked, sounding unsure of himself.

"You're amazing," I all but sighed. "I didn't know you had an Oscar."

"Two, actually," he mumbled.

"Two?" I shouted in disbelief, immediately covering my mouth when I heard Charlie's snoring falter. "What's the other one for?"

"Supporting role. It's not a big deal," he answered modestly.

"But it is," I argued. "You're so talented. I couldn't tear my eyes away from you."

"Is that so?" he asked, amusement coloring his voice.

"Oh, shut up. You know how gorgeous you are."

"You think I'm attractive?" he asked slyly.

I audibly slapped my hand over my mouth, making him laugh. "That's not what I meant. I-"

"You can't take it back now. It's much too late for that." I could hear his smile in his voice.

"Shit," I whispered, my cheeks burning.

"I'm assuming your blushing right now, so I'll make this easy for you. I find you absolutely breathtaking. I sometimes have problems concentrating on other things when you're around."

"Oh," I said lamely.

"I have a question," he said, changing the subject again. "If your father lives in Forks, how is it you didn't know Jacob until recently?"

"Because he started acting when he was a kid. He was never here. But he's the golden boy around here. It's pretty annoying, actually. Everywhere I look, there he is. Plus, I only spent two weeks a year here until I was in high school. Then it became more of a weekend here and there when Charlie and I both had the time."

"Bella? I have another question. How long are you going to be in Forks?"

My brow furrowed in confusion, but I answered him anyway. "Until Sunday." I yawned.

"Hmm." He seemed distracted. "All right. You're tired so I should let you get to bed."

"I don't want to hang up," I pouted. "I've missed you," I said shyly. I didn't feel as empty now that I could hear his breathing and listen to his voice on the other end.

I heard his sharp intake of air through the phone. "Then I'll stay on the line until you fall asleep. Is that all right?"

"Yes."

* * *

**Edward**

I lied in bed with my mobile pressed to my ear until her breathing took on a slow, deep, relaxed quality. Once assured that she was soundly asleep, I hung up and called the director, explaining I had an emergency to take care of and that I would be back on Monday to resume filming. We were only scheduled to film one day over the weekend as it was, so my leaving for a few days wasn't going to cause any horrid delay. I then called the assistant director and asked him to watch Samson for me while I was gone.

I started to pack, throwing random articles of clothing in my bag. I didn't even bother to pay attention to see if my bloody socks matched. All I could think of was that Bella, my Bella, was only a few hours away from me and was missing me. I had to know what was going through her mind. I had to know her decision.

Anticipation and adrenaline pumped through my veins with the thought of her telling me she felt the same way.

I grabbed the keys to my rental car off the table as I exited the suite. I walked briskly to the elevator, intent on being on the first ferry out of Vancouver, only to be stopped by Jacob on my way.

"Where are you going at five am?" he yelled after me.

"Forks." I answered, never turning around.

"Forks, Washington?" He was closer now.

"Yes. The very same. Go away, would you? I'm in a bit of a hurry," I said impatiently.

"Why?" he asked, sounding completely baffled.

"Bella," I said shortly.

"I'll go with you."

"Like hell you are!" I shouted in return as I pushed the elevator button.

"Relax, would you? Whatever romance novel scene you plan on acting out with Bella you can do on your own. I'm going to see my dad in La Push."

"Fine," I snapped.

"Fine."

He was silent on the elevator, not breaking his silence until we had gotten downstairs. "Why is Bella in Forks?" he inquired.

"Her father lives there." I was seriously wishing I'd have left five minutes earlier so that I didn't have to listen to his random chatter the entire way.

"Who's her father?"

"I haven't the slightest," I replied honestly. "Would you please shut up now?"

"God, you're crabby in the morning," he said in annoyance.

"I wouldn't be crabby if I didn't have to see your face before I saw the sun," I said angrily. "You're taking your own car," I told him as we got to the parking lot.

"Fine, but I hope you have a lot of money with you, Masen. You'll need to bribe the attendant since we don't have reservations for the ferry."

"What?" I turned around and looked at him blankly. "What are you talking about?"

"You need reservations to park your car on the ferry. Since it's Thanksgiving, I'd imagine they're full."

I ran my hand through my hair. "We'll go around then. I can make it there before noon if we leave now."

"Okey dokey. Follow me." He gave me a smug grin.

"Drive fast," I instructed as I got in the BMW. I slammed the door before he had a chance to respond.

I followed Jacob, winding my way down the road as I struggled to remain calm. My palms were sweating and my heart was thudding loudly in my chest. The closer we got to Bella, the worse it got. I thought I would have to stop and vomit on the side of the road before we got there; my stomach was snarled in tight knots. I kept fighting the fear that she would tell me to bugger off and that she didn't feel the same way. But I knew, instinctively, that it was just that. An irrational fear. The way her voice sounded over the phone, the feeling that filtered through it, was enough to lead me to take a spur of the moment trip and drive across the Canadian border to see her.

We arrived in town just after eleven, but I could barely see a thing with as heavy as the rain was coming down. It came down in torrential streams, flooding the roads and blurring my vision. A figure caught my eye on the side of the road; a rusty, red truck with the hood open and a small woman standing on the bumper, bent over the engine, getting soaked by the rain.

I wanted to drive by and ignore the stranger and their problem, but I couldn't. Something compelled me to stop and make sure they were all right, possibly give them a lift. My mother, as well as Esme, both made sure I was taught to be a gentleman. As I parked, it was obvious that my chivalry was unwelcome, as the woman hovered over the truck never even turned around.

I got out and ran over to her, feeling the electricity in the air palpitate as I grew closer.

_Bella._

"Bella?" I shouted over the rain, licking the water that dripped down my face off my lips.

She whirled around, losing her footing, and slipped off the truck, landing on the soggy ground with a squishing sound. She threw herself back up and looked at me with her mouth hanging open. She was completely soaked, shivering violently as she stared back at me. Her chest heaved with her shaky breaths, the air coming out of her trembling lips in a white fog. Her hair fell limp around her face in thick, black ropes and her face glistened with droplets of water. Her dark eyes were wide with surprise.

She was magnificent.

"Edward?" she asked in bewilderment. "What are you doing here?"

My laugh echoed throughout the trees, bouncing off the green of my surroundings. "What am I doing here? That seems a bit obvious, don't you think?" I blinked the rain away and took a step closer to her. "I'm here for you. I know I told you I'd wait for you. But I couldn't stay away." I gave her a crooked grin. "I suppose it's a good thing I'm here, though, seeing as you're having a bit of a problem."

"It just stopped," she griped. "I don't know what the fuck happened."

I welcomed the vulgarity. "What are you doing out here on Thanksgiving, anyway? Aren't you supposed to be at your father's house, making dinner?"

She took a step towards me and smiled. "The turkey's in the oven so I thought I'd take those movies back. I don't need them anymore."

"No?"

She shook her head. "They were great, but they weren't what I needed."

"What do you need?" I asked nervously. I tried to swallow my heart back down uselessly.

"You." She closed the distance between us. "I'm sorry."

"Bella-"

"No, let me say this. I'm sorry I made you spend three weeks waiting for me. I'm sorry I didn't tell you what I wanted the night you left. I'm sorry it took me so long to realize what I want."

"What do you want?" I whispered, staring in her warm brown eyes and seeing everything laid out before me without her even speaking. I found everything I had ever been looking for right there, as if it had been waiting for me all along.

"I want to be with you. But I'm scared. I'm scared of the way you make me feel. How the air around us seems to buzz when we're together. How touching you," she skimmed her fingers along my jaw, setting it afire, "sends sparks straight to my heart. How this," she took my hands and laid them over her chest, letting me feel the pounding of her heart inside, "seems to beat only for you.

"I tried to convince myself that it wasn't worth it. That I could create a barrier and keep things platonic between us. But I can't. I don't want to share the spotlight with you. I don't want to hide and keep our relationship secret. But the alternative is much, much worse. A life without you." Her chin trembled and tears filled her eyes. "I'm not too late, am I? You didn't change your mind and decide I wasn't worth it, did you?"

I slid my hands up to her neck, cupping her face gently and pulling her closer to me. With her words I knew I wasn't falling in love with her. I was already there. I loved her with every cell of my body, every part of my soul. Everything in my life had led me here, to her.

"I could never change my mind about you," I whispered against her lips. "I love you. I don't know how or why, but I do. I know nothing about you, except that you were somehow meant to be mine, just as I am meant to be yours. I've been waiting for you."

"That's not a line from one of your movies, is it? Because that was really good," she laughed.

I chuckled. "No. It's mine."

And finally, standing in a downpour on the side of the road, I gave myself over to her and kissed her. Our lips met, soft and tender at first, before the fire that roared in my blood took over. I swept my tongue over hers, reveling in her smooth, sultry taste mixed with the rain, as I inhaled her amazing scent and deepened the kiss. Her arms wrapped around my neck and she fisted my hair in her hands, tugging on it gently and eliciting a low moan from me.

My hands moved to her delicate waist, snaking inside her coat, as I pulled her closer to me. She went limp in my arms, molding against me so perfectly, like we were two pieces of the puzzle, fitting together seamlessly. I was lost in her, steeped in her.

She broke away, gasping for air, and giggled as I trailed kisses along her jaw and nipped her earlobe.

"What?" I asked, my own breathing coming in ragged gasps.

"I'm kissing Edward Masen on the side of the road. In the rain. After he told me he loved me. I'm living every girl's fantasy."

I hummed. "I suppose you are. I do, though. Love you, that is. More than should be possible at this point in our relationship, seeing as though we're just starting out."

"We have a relationship?" she asked coyly.

"We do. Unless you are completely full of shit and said all that just to get to my pecker," I teased.

"Edward Masen has a sense of humor. Who would have thought," she said against my ear.

"I have moments."

"But I'm not full of shit," she whispered. "And I've never said this to anyone before, so here goes." She took a deep breath as her heart hammered against mine. "I love you."

The pleasure that raced through my veins was indescribable.

"Say it again," I said softly, pulling back to see her. "I want to hear you say it again."

She smiled affectionately up at me as I studied her face, memorizing the way she looked at this exact moment. The way her hair fell over her face, the droplets of water caught in her eyelashes, and the faint pink of her blush that tinted her cheeks. "I love you," she repeated.

I took her lips with mine again, nibbling on her bottom lip, causing her to mewl into my mouth.

She abruptly pulled back and gave me a wicked grin. "You mentioned something about me getting to your pecker. How close do you think I am at this particular moment to _actually_ getting to it?"

I laughed once and pressed her against me so she could feel the effect her kiss had on me. "Close, love. Very close. But I think we should determine the parameters of our relationship before I take you to bed. I don't sleep around," I said in all seriousness.

"Parameters?" She snorted. "What are you, a mathematician?"

I raised my brow. "Making fun of me already, are we?"

She stifled a laugh and pulled away, clasping her hands demurely in front of her and looking up at me from behind her lashes. "All right, Mr. Masen. What are the parameters of our relationship?"

"Monogamous. Serious. Nothing casual."

"Agreed."

"Honest. You won't hide anything that goes on in that slightly deranged head of yours."

She gave me an arch look. "I don't know if I should take that lightly or be offended."

"Lightly." I grinned.

"Honesty. Works both ways."

"Deal."

She wrapped her arms around my neck again. "Anything else?"

"One last thing. It's entirely up to you, you understand. Are we public or private?" I asked quietly, watching her intently as she thought about it.

"Private. I don't want my life to change just because I'm with you." She chewed on her lip nervously.

"All right, if that's what you want. But understand that there may be times that I have to attend events with Tanya to keep up appearances." I pushed her matted hair off her forehead. "It might make our lives easier if the press doesn't have any reason to think she and I aren't together. They won't be looking for me to be with another woman, especially one who's my PA. I think that if I continue the charade, perhaps I can go places with you. Take you to dinner, that sort of thing, under the pretense that I'm having a casual dinner with my employee, having a work related chat. I won't be able to touch you, but I can save that for when we're alone. With all the ways I've imagined being able to touch you, I think we might be spending the first few months in bed as it is." I gave her a devilish smile.

"You lead, I'll follow. I have no idea how to do any of this. You're the evasion expert here." I nodded. "Now, if you could give me an idea of how you've imagined touching me-"

She stopped talking as I crushed my mouth against hers, letting my hands roam freely inside her coat. I grazed my thumb over her breast and felt her nipple pebble up with my touch as a shudder ripped through her. The drumming demand to take, to taste, was consuming me again and I knew I needed to take her someplace more appropriate for our first time together before I lost all sense of reason and took her right here on the side of the road. The desperation was coming quick and fast as she went pliant in my arms, responding to every small touch and graze of the skin.

I heard the crunch of gravel underneath tires, and Bella tensed up against me as the voice from the car called out to us.

"Bella?"

She broke away and looked at the police cruiser, entirely flustered. "Hi, Dad," she said sheepishly.

"Dad?" I whispered in shock. "I look like a wanker, snogging with you in the rain on the side of the road."

"Is that what we were doing? Snogging?" I gave her a sharp nod. "Good to know."

"What are you doing out here?" her father asked as he stepped out of the cruiser. "Besides the obvious."

"The truck broke down and Edward happened to drive by on his way to see me," she said, feigning nonchalance. I could tell she was trying not to blush like mad at the situation.

His eyes--Bella's eyes--looked me over once, before settling on mine. His face was hard and protective. "Edward Masen."

I outstretched my hand, hoping to redeem myself a little. "Hello, sir. It's nice to meet you."

He reluctantly took my hand and grunted.

"Charlie!" Bella scolded. "Be nice."

He grunted again. "Come on. You two better get a move on before you get sick. You're both drenched." He threw a skeptical look my way. "I'm assuming I'll see you at the house?"

"If that's all right with you," I answered, clearing my throat.

"It's fine," Bella said, looking at Charlie pointedly.

"Huh," Charlie uttered as he got back in the cruiser, driving away without another word.

I ran my hand through my wet hair. "That was not how I wanted to meet your father."

"No?" She grinned. "You didn't imagine meeting him on the side of the road while we were both dripping wet from making out in the rain? Hmm. That's how I pictured it."

I rolled my eyes and felt my lips twitch into a smile. "Get in the car and shut up. My God, you're cheeky."

"Cheeky?" she questioned as I opened the door for her.

"Smartass," I clarified.

"Oh. You love it though," she said as she climbed in.

I smiled tenderly at her. "I really do."


	6. Chapter 6

**Have a good Turkey Day everyone! And thank you for you reviews! **

* * *

Chapter 6

**Bella**

My father was a fucking cockblocker. Edward comes to Forks to surprise me, and as soon as we finally-finally-get our shit together and become an us, my father chooses that specific moment to drive up and interrupt the moment.

The moment I'd been replaying over and over again in my mind since we'd gotten in the car.

It was like a scene out of an old movie. He drives for hours to find the woman he loves, and in some serendipitous event, finds her in the hood of her broken down truck on the side of the road. The rain falls, making the hero look devilishly handsome as his hair darkens and falls in his face, looking almost black against the paleness of his glistening skin. His green eyes are sharp, framed by thick, wet lashes and are smoldering behind the surface in a multitude of emotions, begging to be released. The water drips down over his full, pouty lips and he licks the droplets off of them, pulling the heroine's attention to his mouth. The mouth that, after professing undying love and devotion, plunders the heroine's, causing them to tingle and spark as he assaults her mouth and fire to leap in her veins.

_Holy mother of God, it's hot in here._

"Bella?" Edward chuckled, reaching over and taking my hand. "Are you all right?"

"Hmm? What?" I asked, pulling myself out of the fog. "Yeah. I'm fine. Just thinking."

His thumb ran across my knuckles. "I wish I knew what was going though that fascinating mind of yours."

"My father's a cockblocker," I answered honestly.

He choked on his laughter. "Not what I was expecting. At all."

"Well, he is!"

"Yes. But that's good though." I looked at him like he belonged in the loony bin. "Because if he hadn't shown up, I'm afraid I wouldn't have necessarily had the control required to take you someplace other than the backseat of this car. It was perilously close as it was."

"Car's fine."

"No, it's not. You deserve so much more," he argued.

"Edward, I get it. You're sweet, a little old-fashioned, and romantic. And I love you for it. But right now, I don't give a damn about any of that because the only thing I can think of is how good your lips felt against mine and how great of a kisser you are. And if you have that much talent with your lips, what can you do with your hips?" I giggled. "Hey, I rhymed."

"Well, as much as I love the vote of confidence, this conversation will have to be continued later. We're here, and your father's waiting for us on the porch."

I looked up and saw Charlie standing with his arms crossed over his chest at the front door. "Oh, for God's sake, man! I'm twenty-one! I'm an adult! I'm allowed to have a boyfriend and sex and all that!"

"He can't hear you, love."

"I know. But I feel better now. We can go."

Edward shut off the car, causing the blast of warm air that was coming at me to stop, and I shivered in response. Before I could put my hand on the door handle, Edward yanked the door open for me and waited for me to get out of the car-still soaked, in the rain, getting even wetter.

"You are inhumanly fast, you know that? Like a gazelle or something."

He shut the door and shrugged. "I have to stay in shape for my job." He shifted his bag and wrapped his arm around me protectively, leading me quickly towards the house. "Let's get you out of these wet clothes."

"Don't want a sick girlfriend?" I asked looking up at him.

He made a face. "Not particularly, no. And girlfriend sounds terribly juvenile and simple."

I snorted a laugh, causing him to give me an incredulous look. "Then what do you prefer, old one?"

"No jokes about my age, Isabella."

"Oh, it's Isabella now. I see." We brushed past Charlie and started stripping out of our wet coats and shoes.

Charlie handed us both towels and stood there, frowning.

"I don't know. But girlfriend doesn't seem to convey the feelings I have for you."

"Yeah, I get it. But we have to have something to tell our friends, right?" I toweled my hair.

"Right." His eyes seemed to darken as he watched me. He snapped out of it and turned to Charlie. "Where can I change at?"

"Upstairs hall, bathroom," he said curtly.

"Thank you."

Edward went up the steps, and I started to follow him but was pulled back when Charlie grabbed my arm.

"Where do you think you're going?" he hissed, looking up the steps.

"To change. In my room." He straightened up, eyeing me warily. "Jesus, Charlie, I'm not going to sleep with him right now. Or under your roof period. We'll get a hotel room in town and stay there for the rest of the weekend. Relax. Don't give yourself a heart attack. I kinda like you around." I gave him a kiss on the cheek and headed up the stairs to my room.

I pulled my hair back and changed, not bothering to shut my door, and turned around to see Edward standing at the doorway, leaning casually against the frame. He walked over to me gracefully, giving me a predatorily look as he raked my body with his eyes.

"I didn't get to see much," he said hoarsely, "but you are so beautiful."

Before I had a chance to blush, he captured my mouth again, plundering it with his tongue. He tasted so sinfully good, sweet and musky and so incredibly male. I felt my bones melt again and went limp in his arms, all while electric jolts shot through my body, causing my blood to burn with desire and my lips to tingle with his taste. I felt my head swim and realized I'd forgotten to breathe with all the sensations and emotions pumping through my body with one simple kiss.

"What did you see?" I asked breathlessly.

"The curve of your hips, the line of your breast. Just enough to know I wanted more, but enough to remain mysterious." His voice was soft and smooth, seductive, like cool satin breezing across my skin.

I literally went wet with the sound of his voice and a shiver ripped down my spine. "Um, wow?"

"Wow?" He gave me a puzzled look. "I'm not sure that qualified as 'wow'."

"No, no. The way you said it. It literally scrambled my brain and uh, other things," I said with a blush.

He laughed, his eyes crinkling with his smile, and nuzzled my nose with his. "You are so unbelievably endearing. How did I manage to stay away from you for as long as I did?"

I shrugged. "The same way I stayed away from you. Sheer stupidity."

He sighed. "That it was."

I gave him a chaste kiss. "I need to get working on dinner. You can either help me out or hang out with the Chief of Police."

"Your father's the Chief of Police?" he asked in shock.

"Yep."

"I think I'll help you out," he said quickly, making me laugh.

Edward took my hand and we started to walk out of the room, but he stopped abruptly, yanking me back as he did. He eyed my suitcase curiously and then dropped my hand as he walked over to the suitcase. I looked at the disarray of clothes, wondering what could be so damn interesting, when something purple caught my eye.

Old Faithful.

I threw myself at the suitcase, diving to hide the damning evidence, but was too late. Edward pulled it out and looked at it with a mixture of shock, awe, and mischief. I blushed furiously, covering my face and wishing I could crawl under a rock and hide...or die. Either worked. I hadn't even planned on using it while I was here; it was just a last minute, throw it in the suitcase, decision.

"Bella," he said lowly.

"Oh, fuck. Shit, I... I mean, damn it," I sputtered, too mortified to answer with any kind of coherency. I could feel my breathing come in short, rapid gasps; I was on the verge of hyperventilating.

"Breathe, Bella. You've gone entirely red. Your face, your chest, even the tips of your ears are red," he chuckled.

"Because I'm humiliated!" I cried, still unable to look at him.

"Look at me." I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head rapidly. "Look at me," he demanded sharply.

"Fine," I squeaked, slowly lowering my hands. I opened one eye to see him giving me an impish grin. "Okay, not exactly the reaction I expected."

"And what reaction would that be?" he asked playfully.

"The why do you have this, are you that big of a slut sort of reaction?" I answered meekly.

"I don't think you're a slut. I actually find it rather comforting that you resort to this instead of going out and shagging some random bloke you met in a bar," he said honestly.

"Really?"

"Yes, really." He twirled it in his hands and then put it back. "It's been two years since I was in a relationship with someone. Two years since I took a woman to bed. I can't just hop into bed with someone on a whim. It's nice to know you might be the same."

"I am," I whispered. "It's been two years for me, too." His eyebrows shot up. "And it's only been with one person." The eyebrows practically disappeared with that. "I was nineteen and had a six-month-long relationship with a guy named Tyler Crowley. I didn't want to be the forty-year-old virgin so, I had sex with him. Not often, because frankly, he sucked. But you get it.

"I grew up with a mother who didn't hide sex from me, talked about it with me. But just because I'm comfortable talking about it and making jokes about it, doesn't mean I'm very experienced. I can't hop into bed with someone on a whim, either. My mother does that. And while it may be fine for her, it's not for me."

He closed the distance between us and cupped my face with his hand, trailing his thumb over my jaw. "It appears we have something in common other than just each other," he said softly.

"I think we might end up having a lot more in common than we'd expect," I replied, leaning into his touch.

"I think you might be right." He kissed me tenderly, pulling away all too soon. "But Bella?" His eyes flashed darkly. "Now that I know you have that, I think there might come a time when we'll... play with it." My eyes widened and my mouth came unhinged. "And just so you know, it has absolutely nothing on me."

Did I fall over? I couldn't seem to feel my extremities any more. All I could feel was the throbbing between my legs. And wonder exactly what he was keeping under wraps in those jeans of his.

He laughed at my reaction. "Come on, let's go downstairs and start cooking before I do something incredibly stupid and make love to you in your father's house."

"You want to...?"

"Very much so, yes," he murmured. "I have since the day you came to the Malibu house for your interview."

"Why didn't you?" I inquired.

"I didn't want to start this with meaningless sex. Although, I suppose I was too busy trying to convince myself you were much too young for me to realize that something had already started the day you-"

"Tried to run you down," I interjected. "But you're right. I went from not being able to name a single movie you'd been in to constantly thinking about you. And now you are..."

"Your love," he finished for me with a smile.

A thrill rushed through me with his words. "My love," I agreed.

We went down to the kitchen, and started working on the rest of what I had planned for Thanksgiving dinner. I checked the stuffing and basted the turkey while Edward chopped onions, wiping his eyes furiously with the sleeve of his shirt and sniffling the entire time, with me giggling at how slow and cute he was doing it. We got the green beans started, made potatoes au gratin and put them aside to go in when the turkey was finished, and then started the sweet potato casserole.

"I hate yams," I said as I mashed them up.

"So then why are you making this?" he asked, peering into the bowl over my shoulder and putting his hands on my hips.

"Because, Charlie likes them and they're not so bad when you put in all that sugar and cream and stuff," I said with a shrug. "And I like to have enough to freeze afterwards so Charlie has something to eat besides fish all winter."

"You take care of him," he stated.

"Who else is going to?"

"Is this why you're such a whiz in the kitchen? Because let me tell you, it all looks and smells amazing." He moved my ponytail out of the way and kissed the back of my neck.

"No. I'm a whiz, as you put it, because my mother can't cook to save her life. I learned my way around the kitchen at an early age to ward off starvation. It was either that or become a fat kid with all the McDonald's she was feeding me."

He chuckled. "I can't even begin to imagine you as a pudgy child." He pinched my hipbones between his fingers. "You're so thin."

"I take after my mother. Speaking of which, when you finally meet her, she will explain a lot of why I am the way I am."

"I'll have to thank her," he said quietly.

"Don't thank her yet. She's... unique." I turned off the mixer. "Oh, and she's pregnant."

"What?" he asked in surprise. "Your mother's what?"

"See, I'm glad to know everyone is just as surprised about this as I am. It makes me feel less guilty about my reaction when she told me the other day," I said smugly.

"She's how old?"

"Forty-one," I answered. "It's not too old or anything. But still. One would think someone with a twenty-one year old daughter who works at a temp agency because she can't decide what she wants to do with her life would have gotten that shit taken care of long ago."

"_How_?"

"You know, Charlie asked me the same thing." I sighed. "My best guess is that she mixed up the dates and took her patch or whatever the hell she uses these days off early, thus leading to me becoming someone's sister. She's sort of scatter-brained at times."

Edward handed me the cream. "You don't seem too happy about this."

"I'm not." I poured in the cream and then turned to face him. "What kind of relationship will I ever get to have with this baby? I'm old enough to be its mother. We'll have absolutely nothing in common."

"You know, my sister, Alice?" I nodded. "She's twenty-three. She was almost six when Carlisle and Esme adopted her. Her parents left her in an abandoned house when she was two, and she was then put into a home. We are fifteen years apart. But I still love her dearly. It's made no difference in our relationship." He brushed my lips with his thumb. "You'll see. You'll love that baby. Your heart's too big for you not to."

I kissed his thumb. "Maybe." But I had a feeling he was right.

* * *

**Edward**

We spent the entire afternoon cooking, washing dishes, and learning new things about one another. I was beginning to see the little quirks and events in Bella's life that made her who she is today, that made her into the woman I loved.

Music played in the background, and Bella would sway her hips gently to the music and sing softly to the lyrics. We worked side by side, in tandem, perfectly complimenting each other in everything we did. She would move around the kitchen, going from one task to the next, grazing my arm with hers or lightly bumping her hip against mine as she turned around. She smiled, she brushed her fingers against mine, she pushed stray pieces of hair off my forehead-everything came in natural movements now that she was no longer fighting the pull we had towards one another-and I finally couldn't take it anymore.

I grabbed her waist, spinning her around, and took her in a deep, bruising kiss. It was a tangle of teeth and tongues, of breathless moans, and needful groans. I had her backed up against the counter and pressed myself into her, letting her feel the pure, unadulterated desire I had for her-for only her.

She broke away, her breathing ragged against my ear, and I gently skimmed my fingers under the hem of her shirt, feeling the soft, smooth skin of her back underneath them.

"Sorry. You're killing me here," I murmured against her skin.

"I'm not trying to," she whispered.

"I know," I groaned as the doorbell rang. "That's what's killing me."

She pulled back and gave me a puzzled look. "Who the hell is that?"

"Not a clue. Your house, not mine," I said, grinning playfully at her.

"Funny."

I kissed her again, taking my time and savoring her flavor. She wrapped her arms around my neck, pulling me tighter against her, while my hands freely roamed underneath her shirt, lightly stroking her back and reveling in the feel of her soft, supple skin.

"Well, well. Look what we have here," a familiar, husky voice called out. "Looks like you two finally got your shit together."

"No," I mumbled against Bella's lips. "Please tell me I'm imagining things and that Jacob Black is not actually standing in your kitchen."

"He is," she replied, surprise lacing her voice. She stepped away from me and grinned. "What are you doing here?"

"Apparently, our fathers have become friends in the last couple of years. Your dad bought that old truck off my dad," he answered with a smirk. "Happy now, Edward?"

"I was," I admitted, "until you showed up."

"I don't like it either. But I guess we're having Thanksgiving together." His smirk grew impossibly bigger.

"Wonderful," I muttered sarcastically.

How was this even possible? I was fully prepared to get down on my knees and pray to God, Allah, Zeus, Buddha-I was willing to try them all-and atone for the sins that I must've committed in some previous life, just so I could spend the weekend with Bella. Alone.

Charlie came in the kitchen as Bella and I set the table with an older version of Jacob with long, black hair in a wheelchair. He wheeled himself in and looked at me with a questioning glance, before turning his attention to his son, who was busying himself by carving the turkey.

"Bella?" Jacob asked, looking behind him. "Do you want me to cut the whole thing up? Or just part of it?"

"Part of it, for now," she answered, setting the glasses on the table. "Makes your life easier, doesn't it?"

"Sure does."

"You two know each other?" Charlie asked Bella, pointed between the two of them.

"Yeah. Jacob's working on a movie with Edward right now. I met him, oh, I guess about a month ago? Right, babe?" She looked at me for confirmation.

I felt my face stretch into a broad smile as I registered her use of the word "babe". "Something like that," I said, still grinning.

Jacob stopped carving the turkey and frowned. "Introductions. Sorry, I suck sometimes." He looked at me and pointed. "No comment, Masen."

I laughed; he'd read me like a book.

"Dad? This is Bella and this is Edward Masen," he said pointing us out. "Bella, Edward, this is my father, Billy Black."

Bella wiped her hand on her trousers and held it out. "It's nice to meet you, Mr. Black."

Billy shook her hand, and let out a deep, rumbling laugh. "Call me Billy, please."

I held out my hand and shook Billy's after Bella had moved back. Billy looked over at Charlie, his lips twitching with the smile he was holding in. "Looks like you got an extra one for dinner, Charlie. Bet you weren't expecting that." Billy said, referring to me.

"No," Charlie muttered.

"Guess you were a little late in your matchmaking attempts." Billy's gruff voice was full of humor.

"What?" Bella screeched. "You were trying to set me up with Jacob?"

"Possibly," Charlie said with a blush. "You both live in LA, you're the same age," his gaze flickered to me as he said this, "and I thought you two might hit it off. Sue me."

Bella snorted. "Oh, we hit it off all right, didn't we Jacob? All while Jacob was trying to convince me that Edward was... What was that word again?" She tapped her chin thoughtfully. "Oh, I remember. Smitten. With me."

"Make fun of me all you want, but I was right, wasn't I?" Jacob asked with a grin. "He's here, and from what I saw when I walked in, you two were about to take a running leap to the bed. If that's not _smitten_ then..." He held his hands out in front of him.

"Jacob!" Bella punched his arm. "We were not. It was just a kiss!"

"Bullshit," he coughed out. Bella opened her mouth to speak again but was cut off by Jacob. "Can we eat? I'm famished." He plopped down in a chair.

"Make yourself at home," I murmured wryly, earning an agreeing look from Charlie.

Well, at least he doesn't _hate_ me.

I sat next to Bella and we started passing the food around the table. Once everyone had their plates filled, Charlie spoke. "I know it might seem stupid since it's usually just Bella and me, but we have this tradition where we tell each other what we're thankful for before we start eating since neither of us are all that religious." He looked around to make sure there weren't any objections.

"All right, I'll start. I'm thankful for Bella. I'm thankful for my job and the fish that swim the streams and rivers around here." Bella giggled. "But this year, I'm most thankful that Bella has found someone, even if I may not necessarily agree to who he is and how this someone has come into her life." He gave me an even look. "So treat her right, or I'll be forced to throw myself in the county jail after I murder one of the most famous men in the world."

"You have my word," I said genuinely.

He nodded. "Who's next?"

"I'm thankful for my children. For the grandson my daughter has given me and the success of my son," Billy started. "I'm thankful for my tribe and for my friends, old and new."

"Tear," Jacob said, wiping his eye. "Okay, I'm thankful for my success as well. I'm thankful for the money it brings in so I can do something else I love-rebuilding cars. I'm thankful for my friends and for all the ladies in LA." He laughed at himself. "Um, anything else? Oh, my family, yada yada. Yeah, I think that's it. Your turn, Bella."

She fidgeted under everyone's stare, so I took her hand under the table. "Well, I'm thankful for my parents. And I think I'm even thankful that my mother is giving me a sibling." She smiled at me. "I'm thankful for my brain, because it got me the scholarship that allowed me to go to college. I'm thankful for my friends back in LA. But most of all, I'm thankful for you," she said to me as her eyes welled up. "You go now."

I cleared my throat. "I'm thankful for my family, for the few friends I have in the business and the few back home I've managed to keep in touch with over the years. I'm thankful for the career I've had, the success it's given me. I'm thankful for my dog, even though I think Bella would disagree." She laughed. "And I'm thankful for Bella. For finally putting me out of my misery and loving me back, even if she is terrified. For coming into my life like a freight train and turning me inside out. For bumping into a stranger on the sidewalk, getting knocked over by my dog, breaking pots, vulgar language, and kissing me in the rain. And that's only the beginning." I shifted in my seat so I could face her and saw tears running down her cheeks. "So thank you."

I wiped the tears away from her cheeks and placed a quick kiss on her lips. "You're welcome," she whispered.

"Bleh!" Jacob acted like he was vomiting on the floor.

"Oh, for the love of God. Grow up," I told him in irritation.

"Hey, just because I'm not an old geezer like you, doesn't make me immature. You just know how to turn up the freaking mush, don't you?" He faked a shudder. "I could've lost my appetite. You really like this sappy shit?" he asked Bella.

She smacked him upside the head. "I do. It's a nice break from all the arrogant, affected, LA asstards like you," she said indignantly.

I caught Charlie watching me out of the corner of my eye and turned to him. He gave me an approving smile and stabbed a piece of turkey with his fork. "All right, let's eat."

We ate, talking and laughing, getting to know one another better. Jacob and I were our usual antagonistic selves while Charlie and Billy discussed the advantages of fishing in La Push. Charlie spoke to me a bit, asking me what part of LA I lived in and where my family was, and I couldn't help but feeling that he accepted me as the man in Bella's life. Maybe not completely, but it was more than I'd expected in such a short amount of time. Bella was much more like her father than she'd led on.

My cell phone buzzed in my pocket, interrupting dinner and I hastily pulled it out, apologizing, and read the message that flashed across the screen from Alice.

_-Told you._

I laughed aloud, earning a strange look from Bella. "My sister, Alice. She's a bit of a soothsayer," I explained. "She told me you were my someone the day you came for your interview. She's gloating."

"Did you talk to her today or something?"

I shook my head. "She just knows these kinds of things, love. It's quite peculiar, really. But you learn to get used to it."

"I'd like to meet her," she said shyly.

"You will," I promised. "Christmas?"

"Okay."

My phone buzzed again.

_-Tell her we'll be great friends._

I rolled my eyes and showed Bella the message, watching her eyes pop out with shock. "Whoa."

"I know," I said as I typed in my reply.

_-Quit watching me and enjoy Thanksgiving with your boyfriend's family._

The reply was instantaneous.

_-They're boring and stuffy. Absolutely horrid._

_-Sorry, darlin'. I'll call you later and tell you all about it if you just stop interrupting my dinner with Bella and her father._

_-*Huff* All right._

I put the phone back into my pocket and turned my attention back to Bella, who was staring at me in disbelief "What?"

"You called her 'darlin'."

"Oh, right. It's sort of an inside joke." Her brows furrowed. "Her boyfriend is from Texas. Austin to be exact. His accent is so thick, so slow, you'd expect him to have an IQ of around fifty, but he's extremely witty and intelligent. I started calling her that after I met him the first time. It stuck."

"So, Bella? What do you want for Christmas?" Jacob asked, interrupting the conversation.

Bella gave him a cursory glare, clearly annoyed by his interruption. "A dick in a box," she said stoically.

I burst out laughing as I took in the entire table's reaction to her answer. Charlie was redder than a tomato, Billy struggled to keep his mouth from gaping open, and Jacob was doubled over with laughter, almost snorting he was laughing so hard.

"What the hell, Bella? I doubt our dads get the _SNL_ reference!" He said between laughs.

"Well, you shouldn't have interrupted us!" she argued back.

"I was just sitting here! No one was talking to me! I had to get back into the conversation somehow!"

I wiped the tears from my eyes. "How is it you know about that skit, yet you hadn't seen a single movie of mine until yesterday."

"You hadn't seen any of his movies?" Jacob asked incredulously.

"I haven't seen yours either," she shot back. "And the only reason I know that skit is because of Emmett."

"Emmett," I repeated, still uncomprehending.

"Emmett. He YouTube's that shit all the time."

"Right." I gave her a loving smile. "You are something else, you know that?"

She flashed me a grin. "Right back at 'cha." She picked her plate up and took it to the sink. "Is everyone done so I can clean up?" She took our lack of response as a yes and started clearing the table.

"Dad? Do you know which hotels have any rooms left for Edward?"

"Um, Olympic might have some left. I'd try there first."

"Okay. There you go," she said to me. "You're most likely staying at the Olympic Suites Inn. The number's in the phone book over there if you want to call." She pointed to a drawer near the back door.

"No, actually, you'll need to call and book the reservation. As well as check-in. I can't take the chance of someone seeing me here." She pursed her lips. "The entire associated press thinks I'm in Vancouver with Tanya. What would it look like to be seen in Forks over the weekend, the town where my PA's father lived, instead of on set with my supposed love interest?"

"Oh, shit. I didn't think about that. Okay, I'll call after I get done with the dishes." She gave me a tight-lipped smile. "This is going to take some getting used to."

"I know. You can change your mind if you don't like it." I took a few dishes to the sink and rinsed them.

"No. This is the only way to be with you without fucking my life up so..." She put the turkey in a freezer bag.

"I'm sorry I'm not some nameless man you met in a bar or café somewhere." I took her hand and pulled her to me.

"I know you are. But you are who you are. And I wouldn't change it." She stood on her toes and kissed me quickly. "Now, go be a man and watch football or whatever with the rest of them."

"You don't want any help?"

"Nope. You're the guest. You get to sit and do nothing," she answered, turning on the faucet.

I stood there, trying to decide if this was a trap or if she was being sincere.

She saw me rock on my feet with indecision and pushed me towards the door. "Go! There will be plenty of time when we get back home that I'll make you help me. Take advantage while you can." She winked.

I reluctantly went into the living room where Charlie, Billy, and Jacob were studiously watching American football. Oakland versus Cincinnati. "You're a Raider's fan?" I asked Charlie, turning my attention to the game. The Bengals were in the lead.

"No, Seahawks. They're on tonight. You watch football?" Charlie asked curiously.

I shrugged. "It's the closest thing to rugby I can get in the States."

Jacob snorted. "Rugby, please."

"It's almost the entirely same game. Only we don't use pads and helmets like you Americans," I retorted.

"Have you ever been married?" Charlie asked suddenly.

"No."

"Why not?"

"I didn't find the right girl, Chief Swan," I answered honestly.

"You're not against marriage?"

I struggled not to laugh. "No, not at all. Quite the opposite, really."

"Hmm." He looked at the TV again. "You get her."

"I'm sorry?" I asked in confusion.

"You get her," he repeated. "I don't know how or why, but you do. More than anyone else, I think." I looked at him blankly, unable to understand. "I've watched you with her today. You get her jokes, her moods, even though you really don't even know her. Strange, really. But I think you're what she needs."

I gave him a genuine smile of relief at being accepted. "Thank you, sir."


	7. Chapter 7

**I'm wondering...when you're fifteen chapters into something, why you just up and STOP WRITING when there's no personal drama going on in your RL! Sorry, one of my faves has gone on indefinite hiatus. WTF? OK, rant over, I figured you all would appreciate that, lol.**

**This chapter's BPOV is a bit different than it has been because--**

**--There are LEMONS! **

**So, anyway, having snide, sarcastic thoughts and comments didn't seem appropriate given the magnitude of feelings that B goes through. **

**This chapter's just a bit of their weekend in Forks before they get back to real life. It's a mix between sex and sharing information about themselves to one another.**

**I hope it meets everyone's expectations...**

**As always, thanks for the reviews and the adds!**

* * *

Chapter 7

**Bella**

"Okay, you're all checked in," I said, getting back into the BMW and handing Edward the key cards.

He took them and then immediately handed one back to me. "I believe this is yours? Unless you've changed your mind and decided that you'd rather spend the night with Chief Swan?"

I took the key from him with a shaky hand. I was suddenly so nervous, I thought my heart would beat free from my chest at any given second. I swallowed convulsively and tried to push the fluttering in my stomach away.

He reached over and brushed a piece of hair away from my face, tucking it behind my ear. "Where did my witty, confident Bella go?"

"I have no idea," I breathed out.

"I'll take you back." He looked at me seriously. "You aren't required to sleep in my hotel room the first weekend we're together."

"I don't think if I stayed, we'd be doing much sleeping," I countered.

"Probably not." He smirked. "But if you're not ready, I'll wait. I've waited this long, a few more weeks won't harm me."

I turned my nose up at the thought of waiting a few more weeks. I needed him, like I needed air to breathe. "No. I'm fine. I promise."

He scrutinized my face for a moment and then nodded. "All right."

He parked the car and slipped his hood over his head, hiding his gorgeous face and disarrayed hair. He took our bags and followed me to the room, sitting them down in the corner and then stripping out of his coat and sweatshirt.

"I know it's not the Ritz," I started awkwardly, but lost all train of thought as his green eyes met mine.

"Bella," he said lowly. "I don't need the Ritz. I need you."

He closed the distance between us and took my face in his hands, kissing me soundly. All the nerves I'd been feeling, the fluttering in my stomach and the idiotic heart palpitations I was giving myself disappeared the second his lips met mine. I could feel the longing for him bubble beneath my skin, threatening to break free in some form of animalistic loss of self-control. I mewled into his mouth, causing him to deepen the kiss and pull me tightly against him.

My hands went into his hair on their own volition, fisting and tugging the soft, silken strands between my fingers as the air went thick around us, surrounding us within the fog of desire. He took a step forward, inching me closer to the bed, and ran his long, elegant fingers under the hem of my shirt.

He toyed with the waist of my jeans, unbuttoning them with a quick flick of his wrist, and skimmed his fingers across the lacy, black fabric of my thong, dipping them inside teasingly and then pulling them out. He grabbed my shirt and quickly tugged it away from my body, placing his hands on the small of my back and plundering my mouth with his again.

I broke away from him when I ran out of air and pushed him back a little, grabbing his shirt and taking it off, then ran my tongue over the smooth, sleek lines of his abdomen and felt him shudder and twitch against my mouth.

I felt the clasp of my bra snap against my skin as he went to remove it, gliding it down my arms and then moving me closer to the bed again. My pants were next, coming down to rest at my ankles along with my thong before I could even process the movement.

I stepped out of them and saw him watching me intently, with a slight crease between his brow.

"What?" I asked, flushing nervously. I had to fight with the desire to cover myself up and hide from his stare.

"You're beautiful," he murmured, his eyes darkening before me. He ran his fingers over the cherry blossom tattoo on my hip, working down towards where I needed him most, and sent a fresh wave of heat through me.

"So are you," I breathed, reaching out for the button of his jeans.

"What?" he asked, shaking himself out of a daze.

"You're beautiful," I said, repeating his words. "Your face, your body, your soul..."

His breath hitched in his throat, his eyes were liquid with emotion. "No one's ever called me beautiful before."

"They haven't?"

He shook his head and smirked. "Hot, gorgeous, sexy, I've heard. But never beautiful."

I managed to get his jeans and boxers down his legs just as he grabbed me, picking me up, and taking me to the bed. He laid me down gently, crawling on top of me, and settled between my thighs.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him down to me, capturing his mouth with mine as he ran his hand up my side and to my breast, taking it and kneading it gently. He broke away from the kiss, raking his mouth over my hot, flustered skin as he worked his way down my body.

He took my nipple in his mouth, sucking down and swirling his tongue over the hardened peak. I arched up against him as the bolt of pleasure rushed through me. His hand traveled down my body, coming to rest in between my legs. As his fingers trailed over my slit, his breathing became ragged against me, coming out in quick, sharp gasps.

He plunged them inside me, groaning, and flicked my clit with his thumb. I tried to do something, anything, to work his body the way he was working me, but I couldn't get my hands to move away from the back of his neck. I was drowning in the sensations that those wondrous hands were giving me, lost in the love for him that washed over me. He knew every way to play me, like I was an instrument he'd spent his whole life perfecting.

I trembled beneath him as the pulsing fire rushed over me. I cried out his name as I came, expecting to come down, but instead stayed on that ragged edge, coming up and crashing down again.

"Bella," he murmured against my skin, pulling his hand out from between my legs.

He shifted his body so that he was just outside my entrance, and I lifted my hips, silently pleading him to continue, needing to feel us connect.

"Please," I begged wantonly.

He pushed himself into me slowly, stretching me as he filled me. I moaned loudly, partially from the discomfort and partially from the feeling of completeness that was consuming me.

I heard his grunt against my chest as he held still inside me, letting us both adjust to the feeling of us together. I rolled my hips, causing him to take in a deep, shuddering breath and pull his hips back, lifting his head and watching me closely as he slid into me in an unhurried movement.

My eyes nearly rolled to the back of my head when he was all the way inside me again. It was almost too much, the intense, overwhelming pleasure matched with the emotions that were swelling inside me.

He kept the pace slow, showing me so much tenderness with the lingering graze of his fingers over my body and still being able to cause my skin to hum and fire to roar in my blood. I lost myself in the mists he created inside me, unable to concentrate on anything other than the feel of his slick body gliding over mine and his long, deliberate strokes. He rolled my nipples and shifted me underneath him, going even deeper into me and took me into a bruising, body-vibrating kiss.

I could feel it coming, like the calm before the storm. My head cleared briefly, long enough to see his mossy green eyes staring down at me as he broke away from the kiss. His lips curved into a breathtaking grin; his hair fell into his eyes.

"So beautiful," he whispered.

Everything inside me pitched and rolled once as he thrust into me again. I shivered and twitched beneath him as I came hard, biting down on my lip and still screaming out as the waves rushed over me. His face contorted with concentration as my muscles pulsed violently around him, pushing him over the edge.

His entire body locked up as he came, and he let his head fall into the crook of my neck and groaned into my skin. His arms went weak and he collapsed on top of me, peppering reverent kisses over my face and giving me an adoring smile.

"I love you," I whispered, feeling as though my entire being had been rocked to the core. The words didn't seem to be enough--which caused a fresh jolt of fear to surge through me.

"I love you."

I looked into his steady green eyes and felt a calm wash over me. He was like an anchor, steadying me in the stormy seas.

"I saw that," he stated, rolling over to the side and taking me into his arms.

"Saw what?" I asked in confusion.

"That quick flash of fear that went through your eyes."

"Oh," I responded guiltily.

"I'm nothing to be afraid of. _We're_ nothing to be afraid of," he said confidently.

"I know. It's just so much, so fast. I'm sorry."

He stroked my cheek lightly with his hand. "Don't be." He kissed me chastely and grinned. "So it's come to my attention that we know absolutely nothing about each other."

"Um, you knew that," I giggled. "Dumbass."

"Ha, ha." He rolled his eyes. "I intend to fix that. Right now."

"How's that?" I questioned, settling comfortably against him.

"By asking you a series of annoying questions." He paused. "First, what is your favorite flower?"

I looked at him blankly. "You're serious?"

"Mmm. Very."

"Um, okay." I thought it over. "White tulips."

"Why?"

"They're simple. Elegant. Pure." I blushed. "I don't know."

"Like you," he said, tweaking my nose.

I snorted. "I'm hardly elegant, Edward."

"I disagree. You're pure, even though you tease and joke about a lot of things. And your body is incredibly elegant."

My blush grew even deeper. "Thanks."

"Favorite color?"

I looked away quickly. "Green."

I caught his lips twitching out of the corner of my eye. "Why's that?"

"It's the green of the palm trees in LA, the green of the forests here in my father's hometown. The color of your eyes," I answered honestly. "What's yours?"

"Brown," he said fervently. "Because it reminds me of you. Of your hair, your eyes. I never knew brown could be so captivating until I met you."

"Aw," I said teasingly, giving him a playful slap on the shoulder. "So how did you become an actor?"

"Well, I was at Cambridge, actually."

I raised my eyebrows. "You went to college?"

He nodded. "I was studying medicine, and I needed one last elective course before I graduated. I decided to take a theater class and was happened upon a producer looking for new talent. He asked that I come to an audition the following week, and I figured that since I had some extra time on my hands, I'd go. That audition ended up in me acting in my first film."

"Wow. Did you graduate?" I asked him.

"I did. But things sort of... took off and I never went to medical school."

I grinned. "So if you weren't such a good actor, you'd be a doctor right now."

"I would, yes." He ran his thumb over my lips. "What are you planning to do with that English degree of yours after you graduate?"

I blanched because I honestly had no clue. I had one semester left before I graduated and the only thing I had going for me was a career as Edward's PA--not that I was complaining. The pay was good, and I got to spend time with the man I loved. But as for a career of my own, I was still undecided. I'd been thinking about taking my degree and trying to find a job in the public school system somewhere as an English teacher since the schools were so desperate for good teachers, you weren't even required to have a teaching degree half the time to get the job. But I wasn't sure I could handle being around sullen middle-schoolers day in and day out for the rest of my life.

And then there was the option to stay in school. Get my PhD. I still had time to apply to graduate school, but I wasn't sure it was something I wanted. I loved school, loved learning, but I'd spent my so much of my life wrapped up in text books, that I'd missed a lot. Things that I was just beginning to see now that I'd found Edward. I would be in school until I was pushing thirty if I chose to do this. And with Edward in the picture, my future was even more disjointed and hazy than it was before--something that was so completely terrifying, I chose to ignore it.

"I have no idea. I've been thinking about getting my PhD since I still have no fucking clue what I want to do with my life. Besides be your PA, of course." I gave him a playful grin.

He chuckled. "Of course. How much work would something like that require?"

"A lot. I'd need to take a screening exam and then once enrolled, I'd have seminars on top of courses. I'd have to meet a foreign language requirement, which should be pretty easy since I've taken a lot of French, and then I'd have to write a dissertation and have an oral exam on it. I'd also have to move if I chose to tenure somewhere. And I love LA. It has you, my mother, my friends." I bit my lip with anxiety.

"Sounds like you have a lot to think about," he said quietly.

We continued like that on and off for the rest of the night, not sleeping once. We shared childhood stories, irrational fears, pet peeves, and interests in between rounds of exploring the indescribable connection we had to each other physically. By the time morning rolled around, we were each insane with exhaustion, but happy. Giddily so. I knew more about Edward Masen than I did before.

I fell in love with him all over again.

* * *

**Edward**

She was it for me. If I'd thought I'd known it before, I didn't. I didn't have the slightest idea that being with her, learning about her, would turn into something this strong. Everything she did, everything she was, pulled me to her, satisfied me in such a way I never knew possible. I was satiated in every way--physically, emotionally, spiritually. Nothing, nothing, could tear me away from her. Not now, not ever.

I thought about our weekend together so far, and grew hard again. I glanced down as the water in the shower poured over me and chuckled. It was like I couldn't get enough of her glorious body and her warm, brown eyes. They swam with emotion our first time together, showing me the enormity of her love for me, even though I knew she was scared to death of it. She was young, and so terribly inexperienced, and somehow, ridiculously so, self-conscious of herself. She was contradictory. On the outside, she was bold and vibrant, full of life. But on the inside, she was inexplicably insecure, lacking the life experiences most of us had gained by our twenty-first year to know how wonderful she really was and what it was that would make her honestly happy in life.

I got out of the shower and saw Bella bent over a room service menu, still wrapped in her own towel. She looked up, and I gave her a sheepish grin. "Normally, I'd have already ordered everything and had it up here, along with something terribly cliché like roses and mimosas, but seeing as though I'm not actually supposed to be here... I didn't."

"I don't need all that. I'm happy with things like they are now. Simple and easy. I think you might frighten me away if you did all that shit," she joked.

I rolled my eyes and pulled her into my lap. "Get over it, love." I looked at the menu quickly. "What do you want?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. What do you want?"

"I want Eggs Benedict on whole wheat English muffins, some turkey bacon, and coffee, please." I kissed her quickly and scooted her onto the bed. "And then I'm going to want you again, so don't get dressed."

"How am I supposed to answer the door when room service gets here?" she asked in disbelief.

"Be creative." I smirked.

She ordered room service and slipped on one of my button down shirts, buttoning it only enough so that she wasn't indecent. Although, I was pretty sure my pecker was furiously disagreeing with that assumption. It was the sexiest thing I'd ever seen in my life.

The food arrived and as we sat down to eat, her cell phone began chirping loudly on the nightstand. She hopped up and answered it, plopping back down in her seat with a smile on her face.

"Hi, Reneé. How are you feeling?" she asked, taking a bite of her toast, listening carefully. There were a series of vague answers and agreements as her mother chattered on the other end.

She snatched a piece of my bacon and giggled. "Yeah, things are good here. Charlie's fine."

I playfully tried to take it back, only to have her hold it out of my reach. "Isabella," I warned softly.

"Did you check in the freezer?" Bella inquired. I gave her a strange look. She laughed at both me and her mother. "Listen, I'll talk to you when I get back to LA, okay? I'm, um, I'm kind of busy right now."

"Actually, I'm with someone," she muttered. Her eyes went wide and her face reddened with what her mother said to her. "Of course he's clean!" she shrieked. "Jesus, Reneé, I'm not an idiot! I'm hanging up now."

She threw the phone on the bed and groaned. "She just asked me if you had any diseases."

I laughed. "No, no diseases. You need to make sex a habit for that."

"I know, right?" She shook her head. "I'm sorry."

"You said someone, not me," I stated casually.

"I did. Remember the scatterbrained comment I made before?" I nodded. "Well, she lost her phone. And found it in the freezer. At my suggestion."

"Really?" I asked her incredulously.

"Really," she confirmed. "So until I can talk to her about it and make sure she understands not to go blabbing it around town, I can't tell her about us." She gave me a pleading look. "But I will, I promise. I'm not trying to hide you from my mother."

"I know you're not." I arched my brow. "Can I have my food back now?" I asked, gesturing to the piece of bacon still in her hand.

"Nope." She popped it in her mouth and chewed.

I acted irritated. "I can't believe you did that. Do you have any idea how much I don't get to eat each day so that I can look good on camera?"

Her eyes went wide and she put her hand over her mouth. "I'm sorry. I didn't know."

I stifled a laugh. "Bella. I was joking. I don't really watch everything I eat. I just choose not to clog my arteries with regular bacon."

"Oh. That wasn't very nice." She scowled.

"But your reaction was actually pretty funny," I chuckled. "You're ridiculously gullible."

"You're ridiculously good at acting," she argued.

"I have had practice, you know." I gave her another smirk.

She abruptly changed the subject. "Do you miss your parents?"

I felt the stinging pang of longing shoot through me like a bullet and quickly pushed it away. "Every day," I said honestly.

"What do you regret the most about them being gone?" she asked shyly.

"That I can't remember them as well as I'd like," I replied. "It's been twenty-two years. I've forgotten my mother's laugh and my father's voice. I remember what my mother looked like, because I see it in the mirror every day, but I can't remember my father. Not really. I can look at pictures and see him, but I can't remember what he looked like when he stood in our kitchen or even when he was angry with me for doing something incredibly daft." I reached over and took my wallet off the counter behind the table. "I have a picture, if you want to see."

I handed it to her and watched her gently skim her fingers over their faces. "You do look like your mom," she whispered.

I smiled. "Same hair, same eyes. Even the same smile."

"What are their names?"

"My father's name is Edward, also." Her eyes snapped up to mine. "My mother's name is Elizabeth."

"How," she swallowed, "how did they..."

"Car accident. They were on their way back to London from the Kent house. They insisted on driving instead of taking the train. I was supposed to go with them, but I had a paper due the following week and there was some party at a mate's house that weekend, so I stayed home alone. My first weekend without my parents, actually." I frowned with the memories of the police at my doorstep. "I'd like to say they were hit by a drunk driver or something equally terrible, but the police believed they were arguing and ran off the road. Hit a light post head on and wrapped the car around it." My voice caught. "They never argued."

"I'm so sorry," she whispered, grabbing my hand.

"What brought that on?" I asked, turning my hand around and linking our fingers.

"I just can't imagine my life without my parents here. Reneé may act more like an older sister than a mother, but she's the only mother I've ever known. And not being able to hop on a plane and meet Charlie at the Port Angeles airport whenever I want..." She trailed off, looking at me sadly.

"I've learned to live with it. And I was extremely fortunate to have Carlisle and Esme take me in. It's been long enough now that I consider them my parents just as much as Edward and Elizabeth Masen were." I watched her yawn softly. "Let's take a nap, love. We have to both start back tomorrow. I don't want you going back to class Monday exhausted."

She laughed softly. "You're spoiling me, Edward." I shrugged and pulled her to the bed. "I thought you said you wanted me again."

"We can do both," I murmured as I nuzzled her neck.

She arched her neck into my kisses. "I like that idea."

"So do I."

I grazed my teeth along her neck and heard her quick intake of air, then began exploring her body with my hands. I moved my mouth over her skin, tasting her sweetness, and moved my fingers to the buttons of her shirt. In three quick flicks of my fingers, I had her incredible body exposed to me.

I slipped my hands inside the shirt, teasing her lightly as I brushed my fingers along her skin and the undersides of her pert breasts. I took her mouth in mine, delving deeply with my tongue, and listened to her sweet sigh as she melted in my arms.

I pushed the shirt off her just as she took the towel off my waist and threw it to the ground. Her tiny hand wrapped around my shaft, squeezing and stroking me slowly, causing the air to leave my lungs as the yearning for her filled my body.

I laid her down, and brought her legs up to my shoulders as I licked and nibbled up her thighs. I looked up to her and saw her watching me with heavy eyes. In one long, deliberate stroke, I ran my tongue over her and saw her eyes flutter closed as she moaned softly, all while that delicate pink tinted her cheeks as her brain registered where I was and what I was doing.

I flicked her clit and dipped inside her with my tongue, using my fingers simultaneously to bring her closer and closer to release. I plunged my fingers inside her and bit down on her clit gently, before I swirled my tongue around it and listened to her spiral out of control as I did.

Her body rocked in time with my fingers; her breathing grew heavy. I glanced up just in time to see her face contort beautifully as she climaxed, filling me with such satisfaction as my name crossed her lips.

I pushed myself up and drove into her without warning, listening to her cry out in pleasure as we connected. I groaned as her tight body wrapped around me and put all my focus in not coming inside her immediately.

Every part of me felt bound to her, unable to break away from her now if I tried--even if the world around us collapsed and fell apart, I was locked inside her gaze, trapped inside her body. My soul mingled with hers as our bodies moved together fluidly in a dance as old as time itself.

I flipped us over so that she was on top of me, and watched her take me into her again, moving sinuously against me and rolling her hips every time she came down. I grabbed her hips, feeling the slick plastic of her patch under my fingers and stroking the lines of her tattoo with my thumb, as I brought her down on me harder, faster.

"Bella," I said in a growl between my teeth.

She said my name in response, coming down on me and trembling as she started to come. I pulled her down and took her mouth with mine again, her moan vibrating in my mouth as we fell off the cliff and came together.

* * *

I drove her back to Charlie's, once again in the pouring rain, and sat in the driveway with her as I struggled with a way to tell her goodbye.

"This weekend's been fun," she teased. "See ya around, Masen."

I shook my head and smiled. "Call me when you get back to LA?" I requested.

"I will. You know I will," she said seriously.

I nodded once and looked at her, surprised to see her face mirroring the ache I felt inside. "God damn it, Bella. I don't want to go. Three weeks seems impossible to me now."

Her chin trembled and a tear rolled down her cheek. "Don't fall in love with some random extra up there."

I made a face. "Have you gone mad? I can't even think about looking at anyone anymore, much less fathom actually being with someone else. I have a sex scene coming up with Tanya, and I don't know how I'm going to get through it. I don't even think I can shut everything off and go through the motions now."

It was her turn to make a face, a very annoyed, irritable face. "First of all, it was a joke, retard. Secondly, you have a sex scene coming up with _Tanya_?"

I laughed. "Are you jealous?"

"A little," she said timidly. "You're mine. I know we have to pretend otherwise, but-"

I cut her off with a deep kiss. "I'm yours, Bella. Always. Regardless of what the world thinks."

"Okay. Hey, by the way, is Tanya's real last name Denali? Because that seems so... stupid."

"Stupid?" I asked, chuckling at her sudden question.

"It's a fucking national park in Alaska." She scrunched her nose up in distaste.

"No, her last name is not actually Denali," I answered. "It's something Russian that no one could pronounce so her agent had her take Denali as a stage name. I think her family is from one of the small towns around the park."

"Oh. Okay, that makes sense. But it still sounds stupid." She sighed. "Be careful on the drive back."

"I'm not driving all the way. I have reservations on the ferries this time. I learned my lesson Thursday."

She giggled. "I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you," I repeated.

She kissed me again, her lips lingering softly against mine, and got out of the car. She adjusted her bag over her shoulder and raced to the house, giving me a small wave before going inside.

She'd solved my problem of telling her goodbye.

I listened to the rain beat at the car for a moment before shaking myself out of the dense sadness that seemed to permeate the air and backed out of the drive. I made it five minutes down the road before my mobile started emitting Simon and Garfunkel's _Mrs. Robinson._

I looked at the ID and laughed loudly as I saw Bella's name on the screen. I may not be a married woman or have any children for Bella to fall in love with, but I got the idea of what she was saying. She was a twenty-one year old soon-to-be college graduate involved in a secret affair with an older man.

I was still laughing as I answered. "I will never understand you."

"No?" she asked with a giggle.

"And I don't think I want to. It's much too fun to be surprised by you. When did you put that on my mobile?" I asked, grinning from ear to ear.

"Last night when you were asleep. I thought you might like it."

"I do," I agreed. "Though, I'm honestly confused by how you know of movie that came out over forty years ago when you claim to not watch TV or go to the theater."

"Reneé loves that song. Out of morbid curiosity I looked up the meaning behind it in high school one day. Which then was followed by renting and watching _The Graduate_. Fucking great movie, by the way." She stopped for a beat. "Listen, I forgot to tell you something when you left."

"What's that?"

"I forgot to tell you 'I love you'."

I sighed loudly. "I love you."

"Okay, that's all I wanted. Drive safe."

I put the mobile down and went through the songs on my iPod as I was stopped at the singular light in Forks. I tapped the screen and listened to _Mrs. Robinson_ filter through the speakers and fill the car with a smile.

The woman was an anomaly. Completely unexpected, like a shooting star in the night sky.

I was never going to be the same again.


	8. Chapter 8

**Thanks for the reviews and adds! I appreciate the hell out of them...**

**This chapter is actually a merging of my original Ch 8 and Ch 9. I wrote them out and hated Ch 8. It was...boring. Well, I'm still not all that happy with it, but if you've read my other stories, you know I constantly second-guess myself, LOL. Besides, I figured you all would like their reunion to be a little sooner rather than later.**

**Lemon ahead...even though they're not together. Hehe.**

**And my little disclaimer here--all characters and anything Twilight related belongs to Stephenie Meyer. But the story below is mine. All rights reserved by Jenny0719 and all that jazz ;) No use of any of my work is allowed without express authorization. K, that should do it. I hope, anyway.**

* * *

Chapter 8

**Bella**

"Isabella Swan, you are driving me absolutely nuts!" Rosalie screeched, throwing her brush at me.

I held my hands up and deflected it. "Why?"

"Look at you!" She gestured wildly to me with her hands. "You look... needy! Depressed! I haven't heard you make one stupid, sarcastic comment in over a week! I can't handle you moping around here anymore!"

My mouth gaped open as I stared back at her. I thought I'd been hiding my feelings so well. Or, well enough. But she was right. I was depressed. I'd moped around the entire city for almost two weeks, letting the imaginary rain cloud dump its buckets of water over my head as I struggled to keep myself afloat. To keep what happened in Forks, as well as my relationship with Edward, a secret from everyone.

Obviously, I sucked at it.

I was sitting on the couch, for the fourth day in a row, watching the fucking Hallmark channel for God's sake, crying my eyes out at the love stories that played out in front of me. I never watched TV, never gave it a passing glance. But I couldn't pull myself away from it. It was like an escape from reality, the reality of my life without Edward.

I couldn't even get dressed. I was still lounging around in my pajamas and was cradling a long sleeved t-shirt I'd stolen from Edward's house.

I took a deep breath of the sleeve and felt my eyes sting with tears as the longing for him overtook me.

God, I missed him. I missed the feel of his body against mine, the way he looked at me, the striking contrast between his pale skin and wild streaks of coppery hair that fell haphazardly on his forehead before he swept them back with a quick motion of his hand.

We'd spent every night on the phone, talking with one another until one of us fell asleep--usually me--but it still wasn't enough.

My chin trembled as I struggled with keeping the tears at bay. I looked up at Rosalie's annoyed face. "I'm sorry."

Her face registered regret, then morphed into concern. "Oh, honey, what the hell is wrong with you? You came back from Forks looking like yourself, but you're not. I'm afraid to touch you. Like if I do, I'm going to break this shell you've got around yourself and you'll fall to pieces at my feet. Something didn't happen with your dad, did it?"

I shook my head. "Nothing like that. I guess I just realized while I was up there I needed a break from everything. From school, work. LA," I lied.

Her eyes bugged out. "But you love school. LA. Hell, I think you even love your job working as someone's minion."

I laughed a little. "Yeah, my job's pretty fucking great."

"Oh, a curse word," she said happily. "That's an improvement."

"Yeah. I think once I get a couple weeks break for Christmas, I'll be fine."

"You're sure?" she asked worriedly.

"I'm sure." I glanced at the clock. "I'm going to get a shower and head over to Edward's to grab his mail and check his e-mail. I'll be back in a little bit."

I took a quick shower and threw on a pair of sweatpants and a short sleeved shirt, pulled my hair up into a messy bun on the top of my head and slipped on a headband. I threw my flip flops on as I walked out the door and started towards Edward's house.

The drive seemed to fly by, maybe because my mind had roamed to other things--like our weekend together--instead of focusing on the road.

Whoops.

I pulled into the driveway and punched in the code to open the gate, only for nothing to happen.

"What the fuck?"

I hit the button again, pressing the little green button firmly at the end and watched the gate come up a foot and drop back down.

I groaned. "Son of a bitch."

I grabbed my phone out of one of the cup holders and dialed Edward's personal number. It rang repeatedly before going to voicemail. I spit out a quick message and then I tried the gate again.

I went up flawlessly, so of course, I grinned like a freak. I pulled slowly through and saw my short life flash before my eyes. The gate slammed down on the hood of my car, hitting it with the sickening sound of metal crunching and grinding together with a sharp screech, almost like nails on a chalkboard.

I screamed out as it hit; I felt my heart leap out into the car and my blood make an entire circuit through my body in a split second. I threw the car in park and yanked the keys out of the ignition before I opened the door and stumbled out.

I swallowed thickly and swayed slightly as I assessed the damage. The engine was smoking, sending trails of thick gray smoke into the air and the hood of the car had been nearly sliced in half by the heavy weight of the gate.

"Oh, my God! Are you all right?" A high pitched voice called out from behind me.

I turned around to see a slender girl with long brown hair coming across the street. As she neared, I noticed her beautiful face looked vaguely familiar.

"I... I think so," I said, dazed.

"That could have killed you!" Her large brown eyes widened as she took in my car.

I cocked my head to the side. _No shit_. "But it didn't."

"I'm not sure I've seen you around before," she said, eyeing me skeptically.

_Are you fucking kidding? I've only been working for Edward for two months now._

"I'm Bella Swan. Ed-" I cut myself off. "Mr. Masen's PA."

"Oh, okay," she giggled. "I'm Jessica Stanley. I live across the street."

I held out my hand because Edward would not appreciate it if I was a bitch to his neighbor. "Nice to meet you," I said, giving her a pleasant smile.

"Nice to meet you." She shook my hand and smiled back.

My phone started chiming in the car, so I quickly ducked down to answer it. I looked at the ID and nearly bolted to the other side of the car as I answered.

"Hi," I said quietly, beaming.

"Hello, love." I could hear Edward's returning smile. "You called?"

"Um, I did." I cleared my throat. "I have a slight... problem."

"What's that?"

"Your gate tried to decapitate me," I said indifferently, trying to make light of the situation.

"Come again?" he asked, sounding wary.

"Uh, well, your gate. It didn't work, so I called you. You didn't answer so I tried it again. It worked and as I pulled through it.... um, crashed down and landed on the hood of my car?" It came out questioningly and in a rush.

"What?" he shouted in shock. "Are you hurt?"

"No, no. I'm fine. I promise." I looked back at my car. "Can't say the same for the Volvo, though."

"Shit," he breathed. I could imagine him running his hand through his hair. "Give me five minutes and I'll call you back. You're not alone, are you?"

"Nope. Some chick named Jessica came over here."

He groaned. "Don't speak to her. She'll leak anything to the press if she thinks it'll further her career."

"Her career?" I whispered.

"She's an actress. I've worked with her on a couple films in the last five years. She's ghastly. I think she's shagging half of Hollywood. That's the only explanation for her actually getting work." That would explain the familiarity.

I stifled a laugh. "Okay then. Thanks boss." I made sure that was loud enough for her to hear me.

He chuckled. "I'll call you right back."

I engaged Jessica in a little awkward, forced conversation, getting absolutely nothing of substance about her except for how much she loved my boyfriend and couldn't believe it when she bought a house directly across from him. Then she went on and on, gushing about how she hated that they lived so close to one another but never saw each other.

I wanted to rip her tongue out of her mouth and throw a chastity belt on her so she couldn't speak to me, kiss Edward, or think about doing any of the shit that I was certain was going through her tiny little brain.

My phone finally rang in my hand, saving me from having to listen to her next "project".

"So?" I asked instead of answering.

"Hello, Edward, my God, how I've missed you," he said sarcastically on the other end.

"I'll tell you all that tonight," I giggled.

"Damn right you will." He paused. "Security company's sending someone out to fix the gate and a tow truck is on its way to move your car. Go inside and get the keys to my Aston Martin. You can drive that around until I get back and we can figure something out about your car. I believe I owe you a new one."

"No," I hissed.

"Can't drive a standard?"

"I can. But you're not buying me a new one. And I'm not taking your car. I can't.... I won't... Shit, what if I fuck it up?"

He chuckled. "Then I'll get it fixed. It's just a car."

"Edward, it's..."

"Isabella," he said warningly. "If you don't stop arguing with me, I'll make you drive something atrocious. Like a tan Pinto."

"You wouldn't."

"No?" he challenged. "Try me."

"Edward!" I shifted on my feet with irritation.

"I have to get back on set now, so you won't be able to talk to me for a few hours. Just take the bloody car and shut up, will you?"

"Fine," I grumbled.

"Thank you. I'll call you tonight."

I took pictures of my destroyed car for the insurance company, and I did a little bit of work inside while the crew from the security company fixed the gate and the tow truck hauled my car away. When they were through, I went into the garage and stared at Edward's car.

One of his many cars.

I looked around and decided the Aston Martin was maybe, possibly, one of the lesser evils. There was an enormous Bentley sitting next to it, a monstrous Land Rover, and some sort of futuristic looking silver Audi. There was even a fucking cherry red Ferrari.

I reluctantly got in the charcoal gray car and sat down, hearing the leather creak under me. I looked at all the buttons and gages littering the solid black interior and nearly had a panic attack.

It smelled like him. Like leather and soap and the masculine scent of him that nearly brought me to my knees, sending a tidal wave of sadness through me.

I carefully toyed with the buttons, attempting to figure the fucking spaceship I was expected to drive for who knows how long, and wound up scaring the shit out of myself a number of times when I turned on the navigation system, made the radio blaringly loud without even realizing I'd turned it on, and managed to spray wiper fluid all over the windshield.

How in the hell was I supposed to drive this thing?

Finally, I figured the damn thing out enough so that I didn't feel like I was going to kill myself on the way across town and started it, listening to the deep growl of the engine echo throughout the garage.

_Shit._

I painstakingly backed the car out of the garage and turned around. I took a deep breath and put the car in gear, rolling down the driveway at a snail's pace, and saw Jessica eyeing the car curiously from her yard.

Not what I needed at all.

I rolled down the window and gave her a friendly wave. "Mr. Masen needed me to do a few things for him this afternoon so he asked me to take his car since mine's obviously out of commision."

"Oh." She looked at the car with a frown.

"Yeah. See ya." I drove away before she could say anything else.

I'd missed most of my classes today, because this morning I was too lazy to go and then this afternoon, I was dealing with the gate from Hell--fitting, since I thought Edward's dog was the guardian to the Underworld--but I had just enough time to make it to my last class of the day.

I parked the car as far away from everyone else as I could, getting out of it when no one was looking, and rushed to the building and into class. I sat through the professor's droning lecture about Albert Schweitzer and some of his more controversial philosophical views and wanted to hang myself.

I was not in the mood for this today.

Thankfully, class was let out early and I was able to get back home to mope. Or so I thought.

I walked to where I'd parked the car and saw a swarm of guys standing around Edward's car, hovering over it with glazed looks of awe in their eyes.

"Um, excuse me," I called out loudly, trying to push my way through.

"Is this your car?" some random guy called out.

"No. It's my boss'. He let me borrow it."

"Wow," he said with a grin. "Nice boss. Think he'll hire me?"

"Go away," I mumbled, blushing at the attention I was getting because of this stupid car.

"You are aware that this is almost identical to the car Daniel Craig drove in _Casino Royale_, aren't you?" The guy smirked.

"Nope. I was not. Thanks for sharing," I said wryly.

"And that the base cost for a DBS is two hundred and sixty-nine thousand dollars," he continued.

I choked on my tongue. "Are you fucking serious?" He nodded as I weaseled my way into the driver's seat, slamming the door on any further conversation.

I was going to kill Edward.

I had to rev the engine twice before the idiots surrounding the car broke free from their lusty thoughts and backed away. I made it to the apartment and parked the car so that I could see it from my window, because I didn't trust anyone that lived in this complex.

I got out and heard Emmett's booming laugh. "Bond. Bella Bond," he joked.

"Fuck off." I pushed past him and went toward my apartment, going straight into my bedroom and slamming the door.

I threw myself on the bed and laid there until my phone started chiming in my pocket. I looked down and saw I'd been staring at the ceiling blankly for two hours. I had studying to do, but I couldn't focus. There was nothing going on in my mind, in my heart. I felt... empty.

"I am going to kill you when you get home," I seethed into the phone.

Edward chuckled. "What did I do from all the way in Vancouver?"

"I had to drive your almost three hundred thousand dollar car to school. Where I was surrounded by a group of idiotic, hormonal boys, and told that this car--the car you told me to drive--was the car from one of the Bond movies!" I shouted at him.

"Did you blush?"

"Of course!"

"I'm sorry I missed that," he said regretfully.

"That's it?" I screeched.

"No, I'm sorry you were embarrassed. But it's just a car." He laughed. "Honestly, Bella, what did you expect for me to do? Make you take a cab everywhere?"

"No," I muttered. "But if I do something to this car, if this car gets stolen or something, I can't pay you back."

"Why the bloody hell would I make you pay me back if something happened to the car? I can replace it myself. What I can't replace is you. I'd be much too concerned with your wellbeing over the wellbeing of a machine."

"I guess."

"I bet you looked incredible driving that car." His voice went low and seductive, causing my body to react to him instantly.

I moaned. "Don't talk like that."

"You don't like it?" I stayed silent, willing the yearning for him that was thundering through my veins to go away. "When I get home, I'm taking you on that car. I want to see you spread out before me, writhing in anticipation. I want to watch your respond to my every touch. I'm going to-"

"Shit," I moaned, soaking my panties.

He let out a sly chuckle. "I see you're missing me just as much as I'm missing you."

"Yes," I breathed.

"Get your toy, Bella," he said thickly.

"What do you want to do?" I asked, reaching into the drawer.

"I want to listen to you come." His voice was gritty with lust.

I moaned again.

"Have you played with it since you came back home from Forks?"

"No. It's not the same anymore," I answered honestly. "Nothing is as good as you."

"Take off your clothes," he growled.

I immediately complied, ripping my shirt over my head and wiggling out of my sweatpants and panties. I unclasped my bra and threw it on the ground. "Take off yours."

I heard the rustling against the phone and the clinking of his belt. "Think of me, Bella. Think of me and touch yourself."

I whimpered and ran my hand over my body, rolling my nipples between my fingers, and then trailing my fingers down to the slick skin between my legs, imagining it was Edward touching me the entire time.

"I need you, baby," I groaned as I ran my fingers over my clit.

"Need me to what?" he rasped.

"Fuck me."

He moaned loudly. "Is that what you want to call it?"

"Yes," I gasped, arching up as a jolt of pleasure shot through my body.

"I want to feel your tight body wrap around me," he said seductively. "Put your fingers inside you and feel what I feel when I fuck you."

I dipped my fingers inside myself and rolled my hips into my movements. My breathing grew heavy as his words cloaked my body with need.

"Edward," I moaned into the phone.

"Turn it on. Use it. Just listening to you is about to make me come."

I grabbed the vibrator and turned it on before I slowly slipped it inside myself, clenching my jaw as the sensations shot through my body. "Can you hear it?"

"God, yes," he choked out.

"I want to listen to you stroke yourself while I make myself come," I whispered.

He grunted as he worked his body, driving me closer and closer to release as I listened to the sounds, imagined his movements, and his face.

I felt my muscles clench up as I drove the vibrator into my body harder, moving faster with each pass. I arched my back and bucked my hips into my hand.

"I'm coming, Edward. Fuck," I moaned.

He let out a guttural sound just before he came, screaming my name out into the phone, and driving me over the edge. My body tensed, stilling, as the waves rolled through me. I went limp as I struggled to catch my breath and heard Edward doing the same.

"Holy shit," I said with a laugh.

He laughed once with me. "I should have thought of that much sooner. I could have saved my poor pecker a lot of pain."

I got up and went to wash everything up. "Has he missed me, too?"

"More than you'll know." He took a deep breath. "I need a shower now, love."

"Me, too," I giggled. "Call me tomorrow?"

"You know I will. Have fun driving the Bond car," he teased.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm taking it back and making Rosalie drive me everywhere," I joked back.

"Don't be stubborn. Sleep well."

"You, too."

I got off the phone and took a quick shower, washing the remnants of my discretions with Edward away and then collapsed into bed and fell into a deep sleep immediately, for the first time since he'd left.

* * *

**Edward**

One week. One long, torturous week was all I had left before I could see Bella's bright eyes and beaming smile.

I'd come back to the set a completely different man. I knew every line, hit all my marks take after take, pleasing the director each and every time. At this rate, anything he wanted to reshoot would be finished just as we were scheduled to wrap up. And it was all because of her. Because I'd no longer been walking in Purgatory, wondering whether she loved me back or not.

I missed her more than I knew possible, but managed to keep it buried down when I worked or talked to Bella on the phone, only letting the sadness and the ache take over when I went to sleep. I had restless nights and fitful dreams without her near, but it was nothing compared to the struggle I had before I'd made that spontaneous trip to Forks.

Because I knew she was waiting for me to come back to her.

I started to type her an e-mail while we were on break, trying to put into words how much I loved her and that I missed everything about her, and abruptly stopped. Bella liked the romance, but after last night, I wasn't sure I wanted to be so romantic at the moment. I wanted to build her anticipation for my arrival. I wanted her desperate for me when I came home so I could spend all night exploring her body again and listening to the sound of her cry out my name as she came.

God, just the thought of it had me almost losing my mind.

I started to write the e-mail, the first sexually charged, dirty letter of my life, when someone knocked on the trailer door.

"Boss wants to reshoot the love scene," one of the assistants said as I opened the door.

"You're joking," I said angrily.

"Nope. Said there was a boom mike in one of the main shots."

I pinched the bridge of my nose in irritation. A love scene, one that I'd barely managed to get through in the first place, was not one of the scenes I wanted to reshoot.

"I hope the incompetent ass was fired," I said tersely.

"He was. They need you on set in five minutes, Mr. Masen."

"Fine."

I let the door close behind me as I walked back to brush my teeth before I made my way to the set. Although, given Tanya's dull personality and spitefulness, I should just let the garlic that was in my broccoli at lunch sit on my breath for the rest of the afternoon.

But I didn't.

I got on set and sat in one of the chairs, letting makeup and hair get me what was deemed as camera ready and then headed over to the director.

"Edward," he said politely. "I need you and Tanya to reshoot the scene in bed. Everything leading up to that is perfect."

"All right."

I walked over to where Tanya was standing, topless and in a nude thong, and started stripping my clothes off.

I handed everything to one of the assistants and turned back to Tanya.

She looked me over with a self-satisfied smile. "Edward."

"Tanya," I said coolly, ignoring her obviously fake breasts.

"My, you certainly are... perfect," she said, raking my body with her eyes.

I fought the urge to run my hands through my hair and sent her a disgusted look. "You've seen it before, Tanya. Let's just get on with it, shall we?"

"Tell me, what would your little girlfriend think of you standing naked in front of me?" She arched her brow as she waited for my answer.

"I'm not sure who you're talking about," I said, feigning confusion.

"Please," she scoffed. "Your little PA. That's quite the scandal if it gets out."

"But there's nothing to get out," I said pointedly.

"If you insist." She gave me a flippant wave. "But if you're not seeing anyone, we still have another week before we get back to LA. Maybe we could..."

"Not happening," I said calmly.

She pouted. "Why not? Everyone thinks we're together, anyway. Why not make it a reality?"

"Because I don't sleep with my costars." It was the truth, even if I wasn't with Bella.

"Pity."

"Right," I said dryly.

The director called out for us to take our places, so I climbed into the bed, hovering over Tanya, and let the assistants drape the sheet in what was supposed to be a disarrayed fashion over certain parts of my body and pulled her leg up around my waist when they were through.

"Think about your girl," she whispered.

"No girl to think about," I replied.

"You're a hard one to crack, Masen," she laughed.

I shrugged one shoulder and looked down at her as the people around me milled around, testing lighting and adjusting small things on the set.

We began filming, and I put my mouth to hers and kissed her, but it was all wrong. The taste, the feel, the absolute deadness that I felt inside. She slipped her tongue in my mouth, and I fought with the instinct reaction to pull away with the intrusion. I let her kiss me as we ran through the choreographed movements, rolling around flawlessly as I pretended to make love to her.

All I could think about the guilt that I associated with this action. That even though I was doing my job, it was so far from where I wanted to be and who I wanted to be with, that I was consumed by the utter feeling of _shame, _encroaching down to my bones.

I broke away and slipped out of the bed as soon as I could. I got dressed again and went back to my trailer, burying my head in my hands and trying to push away the feelings that were pummeling my senses.

"Masen," Jacob called as he walked in the door. "What the fuck happened to you?"

"Don't you knock?" I asked heatedly.

He shrugged. "You took off like a bat out of hell. I figured I'd see what happened."

"Why?"

"You got me," he laughed. "Come out with us later."

I shook my head and frowned. "No, I think I'll just stay here. Call Bella and go to bed."

"Don't be stupid. That girl's got you fucked up royally. You need to get missing her off your mind for a little bit."

"Jacob, I'm not interested in doing anything to hurt her." He knit his brows in confusion. "We're going out. There will be photographers, fans, local girls. Occasionally, a photographer will get a shot of a girl flirting with me and try to make it something it's not. I'm not interested in hurting Bella like that," I explained.

He grinned. "Then we'll stay here."

* * *

Poker. That was Jacob's idea of getting my mind off Bella. Although, I had to say it was working. I still ached for her, like there was some part of me missing and my body was looking to get it back, but I was laughing. I was having a good time with my cast mates as we tried to read each other's bluffs and take each other's money.

It was impossible, given the caliber of actors I was surrounded by, making the game even better.

I studied the cards in my hand with a blank face, but inside I was frowning. A pair of deuces. Not very promising. I checked and watched the bet work itself around the table. When it got to Jacob, he tossed in fifty. Beside him, Ben Cheney threw in his chips while everyone else folded.

I debated for a moment, and then met the fifty.

Jacob turned over the top card. Ace of clubs, ten of diamonds, four of diamonds.

Possible straight, possible flush. And I was holding a bloody pair of deuces.

Still, I checked.

Jacob folded, Ben went another fifty.

I added my chips to the pot.

Jacob turned the next card up. Two of diamonds.

Well, well. I checked again.

Ben raised the bet another fifty.

I knew I should fold, but I had a feeling. And I almost always went with my instincts. So far, they'd never led me astray. My God, they'd led me to the most important thing in my life, even though I fought it all the way. Bella.

I threw in the fifty.

Ben grinned at me. "I'm glad I didn't scare you off. I need to get as much money as I can. I'm not as rich as you boys, since this is my first film."

I laughed. "Glad to be of some assistance."

"I'm going to propose to Jessica on Christmas Eve."

I coughed. "Stanley?" I asked in shock.

He nodded. "I'm ready to settle down."

"But you're only twenty-six," I argued. "And I didn't even know you were dating anyone."

"We've been seeing each other for a few months now, under the radar."

"Uh-huh." I thought about how to continue. "Look, Ben, I'm not trying to tell you how to live your life, but I don't think you should rush into something like this."

Jessica would be an awful wife.

He laughed. "What do you know about love?" I kept silent, looking at my cards. "Oh, shit. You're in love! Is it Tanya?"

"Erm..." I threw Jacob a pleading glance who just looked at me and laughed.

"It's not. Who is it?"

"No one." I took a long pull from my water bottle.

"It is," Ben argued good-naturedly. "Who the hell crawled under your skin, Masen?"

"No one," I said a little firmer.

"All right, all right." He held one hand up in defense. "I get it. It's a secret."

I nodded and watched Jacob turn over the last card, revealing a pair of hearts.

Ben beamed as he showed his cards. "I've got three bullets," he said excitedly.

"Nice," I said nonchalantly. "But I've got four of a kind. I believe that's my game, gentlemen."

"You lucky bastard," Jacob said, shaking his head.

"Don't I know."

The statement somehow reminded me of Bella. I was incredibly lucky to have her in my life. It was almost incomprehensible to me that I felt so strongly about her after only knowing her for two months.

As if she knew I was thinking about her, Bella sent a text message to me accompanied by a picture of her.

_-Care for a repeat of last night?_

I choked on the water that was in my throat as I scrolled down and saw a fragment of what appeared to be Bella's hip, with her fingers tugging the hem of her nearly non-existent knickers down.

"You okay there, Masen? " Jacob asked, cocking his brow.

"Fine." I coughed again. "I'm done. I'll see you all tomorrow."

Jacob's eyebrows shot up as I got out of my seat and practically launched myself out the door, not even bothering to cash in my chips. "Have a good one," he said knowingly as I walked out the door.

I rushed back to my room and pulled out my mobile as soon as I was inside.

She answered on the first ring.

"You are a naughty girl, you know that?" I asked her thickly.

"Do you like bad Bella?" she asked seductively, turning my brain to mush and sending my blood south to my pecker.

"God, do I," I groaned.

"What were you doing when I sent that?" she asked curiously.

"Playing poker. And winning. I left immediately after I choked on my water. I'm sure they all think I'm quite mad now."

She giggled. "Sorry."

"I'm not."

"No?" she asked in amusement.

"Absolutely not." I laid down on the bed and listened to her sigh over the phone.

"So... Where do you want to start tonight?"

A wicked grin spread across my face as I imagined her doing all sorts of things to her body at my command. I knew with everything I had in mind, neither of us would be getting much sleep tonight.


	9. Chapter 9

**Thanks for the reviews! I thought I'd update this morning while I have time since I'll be super busy Christmas shopping this weekend-again. **

**Check out Countdown to Christmas if you haven't already, it's a series of some really good smutty one-shots followed by a collab that I've taken part in. You can find it on my faves :)**

**This chappie has lemons...real lemons-plural. None of the phone sex kind...**

* * *

Chapter 9

**Bella**

"Ang!" I squealed as I ran over to her.

I pulled her into a bone crushing hug and for the first time in almost three weeks felt happy.

"Hey, Bella! God, I've missed you! How have you been?" she asked, grinning at me as she pulled back. "Goodness, you look incredible!"

My face immediately flushed. "Thanks," I mumbled. "You look good, too."

"I look like I just got off work, washing twenty dogs today," she scoffed. "But you, you look really good. Like happily glowing good." She gasped suddenly. "You met someone!"

I gave her a disbelieving look. "Well, shit, Ang. You figured me out in two seconds." I plopped into the chair across from hers. "I'm screwed."

She sat down and looked at me in confusion. "Why would you be screwed?"

"I haven't even told Rosalie what I'm about to tell you. You have to keep it a secret," I said, biting my lip nervously.

"Of course I will. What is going on?" she asked anxiously.

"You got me the job-"

"As Edward Masen's PA, yeah," she interjected.

"Um, well, I'm kind of not _only_ his PA anymore," I said cryptically.

"What?" I watched my words roll around in her head. "You're dating Edward Masen?" she asked incredulously.

I nodded. "I love him, Angela. It's _indescribable_. It scares the shit out of me sometimes." I felt that irrational fear rush through my system. "Like right now."

She laughed. "Wow. I just... wow. I'm so jealous," she said quietly. "Wait, wait, wait. How's the sex?"

I sighed. "Phenomenal." She waited for me to elaborate. "It's like from the very first time, he knew exactly how to touch me. What I liked, how to please me. And then there's this connection we have. I feel it down to my bones. It's hypnotic, being with him. And the orgasms are fucking incredible. Even over the phone."

"You have phone sex with Edward Masen?" She gaped at me. "Lunch is over. I can't be around you anymore. I'm green with envy here. Jesus, Bella. The man's a sex icon."

"He's beautiful," I agreed.

"Not to sound like a groupie or anything, but you have to introduce me," she laughed.

"I will. As soon as he gets back." I felt a dismal sadness wash over me with the words. I still wasn't used to him being away for so long; I didn't know if I ever could.

She picked up on it immediately. "Where is he?"

"Filming in Vancouver. He's been gone for almost six weeks." Hot tears filled my eyes, and I tried to will them away.

"Oh, Bella. I'm sorry." She reached across the table and grabbed my hand. "If it makes you feel any better, the girl that was hired to be your replacement seriously sucks ass."

I laughed and wiped at my eyes. "Why's that?"

"She doesn't do anything! She just sits around, picking at her nails and talking on the phone. I've got double the work now," she griped.

"Stop being so damn nice and say something. Tell the bitch off. I would."

She smiled ruefully at me. "I know you would." She paused. "So why are we keeping the EM thing a secret?"

"Because I don't want my life to completely change by dating the sexiest man in America. Add that to the fact that he's seventeen years older than me and, well, you get the picture."

She scrunched her cute little face up. "Ew, I do." Her deep brown, slightly almond shaped eyes met mine. "Your secret's safe with me."

"I know it is." My stomach rumbled loudly. "Let's flag down our waiter and order. I'm starving."

We ate and caught up, talking about school and our Thanksgiving break. I talked a little more about Edward to Angela, telling the story of how we became an "us". Of how his huge dog-the same dog that had led me to quit my job working with Angela-knocked me down the day of my interview and how we each fought the attraction we had towards one another, making ourselves completely miserable. I told her about the night he almost kissed me and our fight before he left for Vancouver, how he drove all the way to Forks to see me, and our first kiss in the rain.

"It's so romantic," she whispered longingly. "I need that. I think we all need some form of that in our lives."

"I didn't think I'd like it. But I was so wrong." I glanced at my watch. "I'd better get going. I have class in a couple hours. And I need to call my mom to make sure she still wants me to come to her doctor's appointment tomorrow. Phil can't come because he has to work. Or something like that."

"I can't believe your mom's having a baby. I thought my parents were nuts for having the twins and I so far apart, but your mom trumped them."

"I know. I can't believe it either. But I'm actually kind of excited. I've never been around a baby before."

"Ever?" she asked in shock.

I shook my head.

"Jeez."

I stopped at the Aston Martin and hit the button to disarm the alarm. Angela's steps faltered as she looked at it and then at me, her head whipping back and forth almost comically.

'"It's EM's. My car's at some salvage yard."

"What happened to your car?" she asked curiously.

"Well, would you believe me if I told you EM's security gate fell down on the hood of the Volvo and now it's totaled?"

She snorted with laughter. "Since it's you, yes." She looked back at the Aston Martin. "It suits you, Bella. You look hot standing next to it. I can't imagine what you look like inside it."

I laughed. "It's a fucking magnet for idiots. I have had to deal with more guys trying to pick me up, more people just standing and gawking at it in the last week, than I imagined was possible. I don't know how he drives this thing without feeling like a dick."

"Um, because he's Edward freaking Masen, that's why," she said in a tone like it was obvious.

The Blackberry started buzzing in my pocket. "I have to get this," I said apologetically, pulling it out.

"You are so adorable answering like that," Edward said when I answered in my most professional tone.

"What the hell are you doing calling this phone? You never call this phone anymore!" I giggled.

Angela arched her brow at me.

"It's business. What kind of car do you prefer, love? Another Volvo or an Audi?" he asked seriously.

"You're not buying me a car, Edward. I've already filed a claim with the insurance company. I'll just buy a car when I get the check."

"Bella, you'll only get about four thousand out of that car. You can't buy anything decent with that," he argued.

"Maybe I don't want decent," I countered. "Maybe I just need something that will take me to your house and to school."

"What about reliability? Or are you looking for me to come and rescue you weekly when you're stuck on the freeway?" I could almost hear his smirk. "I have no problem being your knight in shining armor, you know. It's in my blood."

"Edward," I whined.

"Isabella," he said mockingly.

"You're trying to be cute but it's not working." But my lips twitched anyway.

"Is that why you're about to burst into laughter as we speak?" A small giggle mutinied and escaped my throat. "That's what I thought," he said smugly. "So shall I buy you whatever I want on my way home tonight or are you willing to have a rational conversation about this, my stubborn one?"

"I'm not stubborn!" Then I processed what he said. "Hold on, did you say you were coming home tonight?"

"I did." I could hear the happiness in his voice. "We wrapped a day early. I'm catching the next flight out. I'll be home sometime around eight. After I pick out a new car for you."

I nearly screamed with joy. As it was, I bounced lightly on my feet and grinned from ear to ear. "No car. Just come home."

He chuckled. "I'll see you in a bit. I can't wait."

"Me, either."

I put the phone back in my pocket and looked back at Angela. "Does that mean I won?"

"Won what?" she asked, puzzled.

"The argument."

"_That_ was an argument?" Her eyes widened when I nodded. "Okay, I officially hate you now. I'll talk to you later." She started to walk off. "Hey, see if you can think of anyone to set me up with! I need... that!" she called over her shoulder.

"Okay!"

* * *

I sat on the couch in Edward's living room and waited impatiently for him to come through the door. My body seemed like it was vibrating with anxiousness. My palms were damp and my heart was thrumming rapidly in my throat. I needed to see him _now_, so much so, that I was on the verge of tears.

I'd been sitting, rooted in the same place for two hours. I knew rationally, I could get some studying done while I waited, but I couldn't think straight. The only thought my brain could wrap itself around was that Edward was going to be home, with me, any minute now.

My stomach lurched as the realization that in two short months, my entire being had centered itself around Edward. I broke out into a cold sweat as I thought of myself becoming one of those dependent women, no longer self-reliant, no longer their own person, instead becoming almost obsessed with their significant other, losing themselves in the process.

The sound of the garage door, clicking as it shut, echoed throughout the silent house and suddenly it didn't matter anymore. The thought was erased from my mind as I was flooded with sheer joy and excitement at the prospect of Edward's arrival.

"Edward?" I called out hopefully.

"Bella," he answered in a relieved sigh.

I leapt off the couch and sprinted towards the kitchen, where he was propping his suitcase against the wall. I didn't even process that I had started rushing across the room towards him. All I could see was the exaltation in his eyes, mirroring my own.

"Edward!" I exclaimed, beaming and throwing myself at him. My arms wrapped around his neck and my legs wrapped around his waist.

He stumbled back a few steps as he caught me, letting out a startled laugh that stopped when our lips met. I welcomed the familiar tingle as our tongues intermingled with one another and the familiar fire that only he could cause race through my veins. I was no longer antsy, instead at home, at peace, now that I was in his arms.

It was a happiness I couldn't even begin to explain.

He walked me to the counter and sat me down, running his hands all over my body, leaving a trail of heat in their wake.

I pulled his shirt over his head and took in his pale skin and beautifully defined muscles. My hands moved over the planes of his abdomen and watched the shimmering movement of his muscles as they twitched beneath the skin.

He grabbed my hair and pulled my head back, exposing my neck to him. His tongue made burning patterns along my neck and jaw while his other hand moved inside my shirt. He grazed the tips of his fingers along the bottom of my breast and snapped his head back.

"No bra," he growled.

His eyes were so darkened by desire, I could only nod as I stared into them in wonder.

He ripped my tank top off my body in a quick, sharp movement and then brought his mouth to my chest, nipping and sucking down while his hands massaged my breasts. He flicked one of my nipples with his tongue and then blew on it, sending a flurry of chills and hot bolts of heat through me.

I groaned and started trying to unbutton his jeans, desperate to have that connection with him once again. I fumbled with them for a moment, before finally managing to push them down far enough that they fell to the floor with an audible thud.

He flicked the button of my jeans open with his nimble fingers and then yanked them down my body in a swift movement, along with my panties. He spread my legs apart and slammed into me, watching my reaction-the blinding reaction to that branding heat that spread through me-as he did.

"Christ, I missed you," he grunted as he pulled back and drove into me again.

I could feel myself beginning to convulse around him and threw my head back as the pleasure started spreading through my stomach in a glowing ache. "Oh, God, baby. I'm going to come already," I moaned.

He pounded into me furiously, holding me against him as I came hard. I screamed out, listening to his name reverberate throughout the cavernous kitchen accompanied by his grunts as he held off his own orgasm.

He pushed me back so that I was laying on the cold granite and threw my legs over his shoulders, allowing him to go deeper. He thrust into me smoothly, letting me adjust to the new angle, and then slowly sped up so that he was ramming into me again. He watched my breasts bounce with his thrusts and groaned at the sight.

He grabbed my hips and pulled me into his thrusts, making me clench up around him again. I moaned again as I could feel myself getting closer and closer with each of his strokes. I stared up into his deep green eyes and lost control of my senses. I came again violently, dragging him with me.

He pulled me up and held me close to him as we both came down, stroking my back softly and placing gentle kisses all over my neck and shoulder. I was reeling from the way he could show me such love and tenderness one minute and so much raw passion the next.

"Um, welcome home?" I said once I'd caught my breath.

He chuckled. "If that's the homecoming I'm to expect from now on, I might need to go out of town more frequently."

I shook my head. "NO."

"Want to see your car?" he asked, stroking my cheek with his thumb.

The joyous moment was over, consumed by an irrational rage that bubbled inside me. "You _really_ bought me a car?" I demanded hotly.

"Yes. I told you I was."

I hopped off the counter and started getting dressed with angry, jerky movements. "I'm not some sort of kept woman," I sneered.

I watched his eyes flash with anger and belatedly realized how terrible that sounded. "In what world would I ever treat you like a kept woman?" he seethed as he pulled up his jeans. "You think I could ever regard anyone, much less you, like a whore? Have you learned absolutely nothing about me?"

"I, uh, I..." I couldn't think straight. My damn hormones were scrambling my brain.

He looked so... lethal. Sharp features, smoldering eyes. I couldn't look away.

"Do you have any idea what it felt like when you told me the gate-that gate," he pointed towards the driveway, "nearly crushed the one thing that I cannot live without anymore?" His eyes filled with pain, agonizingly twisting my heart in my chest. "Have I completely deluded myself into believing that you love me as I love you?"

"How can you even think that?" I shouted, reaching for him. "I'm sorry! That's not what I meant at all." He stayed tense, frowning, as he stared down at me. "I have spent my entire life doing things for myself. I have a hard time accepting things from others. I have this illogical need to be fiercely independent, and you're taking all that away from me," I explained.

"But I love you, so much, I don't even know how to describe it to myself. I promise everything I've said, every way I've acted towards you has been nothing but the truth."

"How do I take that away from you?" he asked softly, calming down.

"My life revolves around you. You've changed me, so completely, that I don't even think the same anymore. I feel like I'm becoming dependent of you." My eyes brimmed with tears. "Forgive me?"

He sighed heavily and cupped my face. "Of course I do. But just because you love someone does not mean you're dependent of them. I could never love someone needy like that. You're the opposite. You're still independent. It's one of my favorite things about you."

He took a deep breath. "Forgive me? I shouldn't have snapped at you like that." He kissed me gently when I nodded and then pulled back with a smile. "Want to see it now? Or are you going to get angry again?"

"Show me the damn car," I said with a grin.

He led me to the garage where a blue Audi coupe sat in the last remaining free space. "What do you think?" he whispered.

"It's so pretty," I said in awe. "It's mine?"

He nodded. "It's considered as a perk, meaning you'll pay taxes on it at the end of the year. You've earned it. And then there's the added bonus that no one will be any wiser to our relationship by doing it this way." I looked at him in disbelief. "You jumped to conclusions, didn't you, love?"

"Wipe the smirk off your face, Masen. I've already apologized once."

He chuckled.

"Can we take it for a drive?"

He held the keys out in front of me. "It's yours. You're free to do with it what you like."

I took the keys to the first new car I'd ever had and smiled gratefully up at him with one thought passing through my mind.

"Babe? Where's your dog?"

He grinned down at me. "Outside."

* * *

**Edward**

I'd spent the entire flight imagining what it would be like when I arrived home. I fidgeted anxiously in my seat, needing to be back in LA and back with the one person who held my heart. My Bella.

I should have known it would be unlike anything I'd expected.

Her energy, the joy that radiated from her smile, as she threw herself at me was a better feeling than I'd ever known. To physically see that she was just as ecstatic for me to be home as I was, caused an unexpected surge of emotion to swell in my heart and nearly take my breath away.

To have her in my arms again, to feel her warmth against my skin, made the desire for her so unbearable, I couldn't even bother to carry her to my bed. Instead, I sat her on the counter and played out all those uncharacteristically dirty words I'd spoken to her for so many nights in a row.

It seemed Bella was bringing out the sexual deviant in me.

And even though we'd gotten in a small fight about the car I'd gotten her, I couldn't picture a better welcoming from her. The argument inexplicably made the reunion even sweeter, because Bella never was one to hide her thoughts or feelings from others. Just to be in the presence of _her_ again, whether we were holding on to each other, shagging on the kitchen counter, or arguing, made the tiring ache I'd felt for so long disappear.

I watched her drive the blue Audi TTS and smiled to myself. It was perfect. The color, the size-everything about it fit Bella impeccably.

I'd never seen her drive until now. I'd never seen the way her brows knit in concentration or the way she bit down on her lip when she was in a dodgy situation. She sang softly to the radio, and then she blushed as soon as she realized I could hear her, doing absolutely nothing to help keep the blood circulating in my body and stop hovering inside my trousers. She mumbled to herself absentmindedly, she swore at the lights that abruptly turned red or when someone cut her off.

How was it that something so simple, something we both did every day, could turn me into such a sentimental fool?

She drove up the coast with the window rolled down, the gentle ocean breeze floating inside the car and whipping her hair around her face in unbelievably sexy, thick sections.

"Want to go to the Malibu house?" I asked her, suddenly inspired. I'd remembered the look of awe and excitement in her eyes when she saw it for the first time.

"Okay," she agreed. "But what about the dog?"

"You care about my dog?" I teased.

"No, not really."

"I know he's horribly spoiled, Bella, but he does have a dog house outside to sleep in. One night won't hurt him," I answered lightly.

We stopped at a nearby store, and I went inside and grabbed a few things for breakfast tomorrow, as well as some other necessities that I knew we'd need. I hated that doing something so normal was made into something secretive. That Bella couldn't even grocery shop with me for fear of someone spotting us and leaking it to the press. And it was too late in the evening to pretend I was merely shopping with my assistant.

I saw pictures of Tanya and me walking around set on a magazine, with the headline that we were in love-getting married-as I paid the cashier and rolled my eyes. Even working, I couldn't escape false rumors.

Once we got to the house, we began opening the shudders and turning on the air. The air was thick and stale from being shut up for so long, making it a little uncomfortable to breathe.

I walked over to where she was standing, looking out the glass door, and wrapped my arms around her waist. "Care to get in the hot tub for a bit until the air cools off in here?" I asked, nuzzling her neck.

"I don't have a bathing suit."

"Who said you needed one?" I whispered, gently biting down on her ear lobe. I felt the shudder rip through her spine and smiled against her skin. "Come on. I feel like I'm suffocating in here."

We wordlessly went outside and stripped out of our clothes before immersing ourselves in the hot, bubbly water. Bella sat on my lap, straddling me, and ran her wet fingers through my hair.

"No one can see us out here, can they?" She looked around the deck.

"No. We're too elevated for a photographer to get a shot from the beach and no one can get through the door at the bottom of the steps without the security code. Something I need to give you," I answered.

"Oh, good. I don't want naked pictures of me floating around the new stands." She grinned at me.

"You won't."

"I have to go with Reneé to her doctor's appointment tomorrow," she said softly.

I leaned into the feel of her fingertips massaging my scalp. "Is that so?" I murmured.

"She's getting an ultrasound and Phil can't go." I stared up at her and saw that her expression was uncertain. "I thought I could maybe talk to her about you."

"You want me to meet your mother?" I inquired with a grin.

"I just said that."

I chuckled. "No, you didn't. When do you want this purported meeting to take place?"

"This weekend?" She bit her lip as she waited for my answer.

I brought my hand from her waist to her mouth and coaxed her lip out from in between her teeth. "I'm available this weekend. What did you have in mind?"

"Well, Christmas is coming up, so maybe we could have Christmas with her?"

"Christmas," I said with a smile. "You know, my family will be here for Christmas this year. Are you still planning to meet them as well?"

She nodded. "But I'm nervous as hell."

"Don't be. Alice somehow already loves you, which means everyone else does, also," I said soothingly.

"You know, I haven't bought anything for you yet. And I haven't the slightest idea where to begin," she said sheepishly.

"Don't buy me anything, love. I have everything I want, right here." I kissed her softly to prove my point.

"I can't just _not_ give you anything for Christmas. Not if you're intending to give me something," she objected.

"I haven't bought anything yet. I did have a couple things in mind." Like the incredible pair of earrings I saw in Henry Winston. "But I don't have to give you anything. How about this year, we just give each other ourselves. We make a night where we focus on nothing but each other. Much like we're doing right now."

"You really won't buy me anything?" she asked doubtfully.

"It will be extremely hard, but no. I won't buy you anything." I gave her a crooked grin.

"Okay," she said, smiling back.

We sat in the hot tub, talking and in essence, just being together. I couldn't take my hands or my eyes off her beautiful body. I watched the way her eyes lit up with excitement when she talked about things that happened while I was away and the warm, genuine smile that crossed her face when she teased me. I ran my hands over her smooth skin and placed gentle kisses in random areas of her body-on the inside of her wrist, the tip of her nose, and on her shoulder.

Eventually, we made love again. And even though it was awe-inspiring and mind-blowing as usual, we were so focused on each other, on being together again, that the act of sex wasn't important. It was just another expression of how utterly devoted we were to one another.

Just another way for me to show her how much I loved her, and that someday, eventually, when I thought Bella was ready, I would ask her to spend the rest of her life with me.

As my wife.

* * *

I woke up slightly disoriented, with the sound of the shower running in the background. I wiped my eyes and stumbled to the bathroom. I brushed my teeth and then headed over to the shower, opening the door slowing and watching something from a fantasy play out before my eyes.

Steam billowed around Bella's thin frame, water pounded down over her creamy skin and trickled down over her beautiful curves. Her hair was almost black, reminding me of gypsies and all other things exotic. The aroma was an assaulting mixture of her natural dreamy scent and my shampoo that sent a breathtaking punch to my pecker. I leaned casually against the door frame and tried to control my breathing and the torrent of lascivious thoughts that involved things like Bella against the wall and Bella bent over the bench to absolutely no avail.

"I don't recall giving you permission to use my shower," I said lightly, even though I felt anything but.

She laughed and spun around, reaching out towards me and pulling me into the shower with her. "Tough shit."

"And now I'm completely soaked," I chuckled.

She shrugged. "You were naked anyway. And besides, you looked a bit... dirty." She looked down at my prominent erection between us. "I can take care of that, you know."

"Oh, I bet you can."

I pushed her against the wall and captured her mouth with mine. I nipped, I sucked, on her lips as my hands freely dipped into her curves and felt how she responded instantaneously to my touch. Her nipples pebbled under my graze, the skin between her legs grew hot and damp. I cupped her arse and squeezed, listening to her giggle against my mouth, before I lifted her up and wrapped her shapely legs around my waist.

She moaned as we made contact, grinding her hips into my erection and trying to speed up my actions. But I wanted to taste her, to listen to her strangled gasps and desperate moans as desire took over her entire body.

I broke away from her mouth, carefully skimming my tongue along the line of her jaw until I reached her neck. I trailed open mouthed kisses down her neck, grazing my teeth along the hollow at the base of her throat, and then continued to work my way down her chest.

I held her waist against me tightly, groaning as I slid up her slippery wetness with ease, as I swirled my tongue over her nipple. I sucked down on the hardened peak before gently biting down and loving the sound that came out of her mouth when I did.

She squirmed in my arms, trying fruitlessly to get some sort of friction against me, her moans of desperation taking on a keenness. Her chest heaved against me as I lifted her hips and pushed into her, grunting as the intensity of her body being slowly wrapped around mine came over me.

Her head dropped down to rest on my shoulder as I moved in and out of her in long, measured strokes. Her body shook in my arms and her nails starting digging into the skin on my back as she began the ascent into oblivion.

I started moving faster, harder, when her hips pushed into each of my strokes. I was somehow aware in the back of my mind that I should listen to the noises we made to together, that her delirious moans would somehow spur me on further, but there was nothing else. No one had ever been able to fill me so completely, so fully and quickly, like she did, to the point that it excluded everything else.

I drove into her as the volcano erupted inside me, no longer able to hold on, spilling myself deep inside her. It triggered her own orgasm, and she said my name as she came around me with a wonderfully, breathy moan that vibrated against my skin.

I let her catch her breath and then moved so that I could kiss her cheek. "My, that was an incredible way to wake up," I said with a smile.

She laughed once. "And now I have to wash up again."

"Well, that's terrible," I teased. "But you can't just yet."

"Why's that?" She brought her head up so that we were face to face.

"Because there were two things that I wanted to do to you in this shower. I've done the first, but I still have yet to bend you over the bench and fuck you."

Her eyes went heavy as she looked at me. "Now?"

I nodded once and sat her down. "Now."

We eventually made it out of the shower, once the water had began to run cold, and got dressed. Bella spent a little bit of time in the bathroom, attempting to get ready with what little resources I had for her mother's doctor's appointment, while I put on a kettle of water for tea and started making us breakfast.

As the kettle began to whistle, I heard Bella's light steps come into the kitchen. I took out two cups while the infusion ball steeped and heard Bella's snort from behind me.

"What?" I asked, peeking into the tea pot.

"Tea?"

I smiled crookedly at her. "I thought I'd be a stereotypical Englishman this morning. Is that a problem?"

"Do I get crumpets with it?"

I laughed. "No, but I believe I can make some cucumber sandwiches if you're interested. Or you can just have an omelet, sausage, and toast like me."

"What kind of omelet?" she asked, her ears perking up.

"Whatever you want. Mine's vegetarian."

"That sounds good. Need any help?"

I shook my head and began making our omelets.

"Oh, I forgot. Got anyone you know of to set my friend Angela up with?"

I looked back at her. "She knows about us?"

"I told her yesterday."

I turned all the way around with the spatula in my hand. "So let me get this straight. She knows, but Rosalie doesn't?"

"Well," she shifted on her feet uncomfortably, "Rosalie's trustworthy, but she tends to have a big mouth. And frequently misplaces her filter. So..."

"It makes sense not to tell her," I deduced.

"Yeah. So, do you know anyone?"

I thought about it. "Actually, I might. Ben Cheney wants to settle down. He's dating Jessica Stanley and I just cannot see the two of them working out. In any lifetime. He needs someone... nice."

"Angela's nice. Very nice." She grinned. "Now, we just need to get them together."

"Dinner at my house?" I suggested.

"We can't go anywhere else." She gave me a look like it was obvious.

"No." I frowned.

"How is this going to work? Us." She motioned between the two of us. "Secretly."

I sighed heavily and plated her omelet. "I've no idea."

I walked over to her and cupped the back of her neck as I sat the plate on the table. "Do you know what I'm afraid of most, Isabella?" I asked quietly.

"What?"

"That you'll bore of me. Of sitting inside my house day after day and hiding when we go out together. That someone will find out about us and that you'll run away when you realize how trapped I am inside this life I've created for myself. That you'll decide we're not worth the effort that you'll be required to put into our relationship."

I felt a slow heaviness inside my chest at the thought of losing her as she warred with her answer.

"I'm not going to get bored of you," she said softly. "But I don't know how I'd react if everyone found out about us and I was constantly surrounded by photographers. It's hard to imagine how you'd react when you're so repulsed by the thought. But I hope that I'd be able to find a way to be with you, no matter what. Because if there's one thing I've figured out in the last few weeks, it's that no matter how stupidly afraid I may be of our relationship, I don't know how to cope without you in my life. You were gone before, in Vancouver, but you were in my life. And it still hurt. I still felt empty."

I kissed her softly as a sort of closure on the topic. Her honest answer was enough for me.

For now.


	10. Chapter 10

**Thanks for the reviews! **

**If you're wondering, I sat down and did a formal outline for this story the other night and jotted down everything that I had on my mind. As of now, it's 35 chapters. But, sometimes I find little things I want to stick in and it ends up being more, so it will be _at least_ 35 chapters. I'll have a better idea when I get closer to the end. If the number changes, I'll let you know.**

**Lemon ahead :)**

* * *

Chapter 10

**Bella**

"Reneé, if you don't quit bouncing in your seat so help me..." I cast a warning glance at my mother.

"Sorry, sis. I'm just nervous. I made the mistake of reading the stupid pregnancy book last night." She turned in her seat to face me. "Did you know I have a higher chance of high blood pressure, diabetes, and this baby has a one in a hundred chance of being born with Down's Syndrome?"

I arched my brow. "No. I did not. But I'm sure you're fine. Both of you. Please don't give yourself a panic attack. Not yet, anyway. There's a few things I wanted to talk to you about first." I grinned widely at her.

"You're not pregnant, are you?"

I cackled loudly, causing a few of the women to give me curious looks. "Um, no. God, could you imagine us being pregnant together? How... screwed up would that be?"

She shrugged. "I noticed you didn't come back with the typical 'you need to have sex to get pregnant' comment."

I smiled to myself and shook my head. She managed to be so spacey, yet so perceptive at the same time. It didn't seem possible.

"So, how's school?" she asked, changing the subject.

"Fine. I have finals next week," I answered distractedly.

"Ready?"

"I could use a few good cramming sessions." Especially since I'd spent the last three weeks in a daze.

Her name was called, interrupting the conversation. Reneé got up and then stared down at me when I didn't move. "Aren't you coming?"

"I think I'll just stay here. Read about the joys of being pregnant," I said sarcastically, holding the magazine in my hands up.

"Just for the ultrasound." She paused. "Please."

"All right," I grumbled.

I followed her back and studiously ignored her getting weighed, because I frankly didn't give a shit, and then went back with her to the ultrasound room. I sat down in the chair as they prepped her and looked around all the foreign equipment. I was nervous and annoyed, for reasons I couldn't place. I didn't want to be here; I wanted to be back at Edward's studying or maybe fooling around. I was a little irritated with Phil for not coming, no matter what the reason was, and putting me in this position. This was his kid for fuck's sake, and I was now tied to a man I'd only met once for the rest of my life, who couldn't even bother showing up for the first ultrasound.

A disjointed image appeared on the screen, combined with a strange, static-like sound when the image moved. Reneé looked up at the screen, completely enthralled, while I just scowled. I couldn't figure the fucking thing out. It looked like a bunch of black with random white lines to me, none making a bit of sense.

After an eternity of silence, the woman operating the machine backed the image up and I was finally able to see it clearly. The shape of a hand, the tiny little nose protruding from a rounding face. The baby jerked and moved as it hiccupped, and I couldn't help but giggle softly to myself.

It was cute.

"Would you like to know the sex?" the woman asked Reneé.

She nodded and the woman moved the wand lower on her stomach, just as the door burst open.

"I'm sorry. I got here as fast as I could," Phil doubled over breathlessly, smelling of grease and oil from the garage he worked in.

"Hi," I said awkwardly. "I'm leaving now."

"Stay," Reneé said firmly. "Why are you here?" she asked Phil.

"Because that's my baby," he replied.

"I told you, you didn't need to take off work. I have Bella with me," she said tersely. "I even told your boss to not worry about letting you off work because it was unnecessary."

"You called my boss?" he asked incredulously. He ripped the hat off his head, showing his mussed brown hair. "Look, I'm trying here. But you keep shutting me out." He glanced between me and the tech. "Can we talk when you're through?"

She nodded once. "Fine." She turned her attention back to the screen. "Where were we?"

_These are the days of our lives..._

It was the only thing running through my mind at that moment. This was so surreal. Like something out of a daytime TV show.

The tech looked completely dumbfounded, and I had to hide my laughter in a fit of coughs.

Regaining her composure, she cleared her throat. "The sex. You're having a boy."

This time, I did let my laughter ring throughout the room. I was getting a little brother. Typical. "Okay, now I'm seriously going." Reneé opened her mouth to protest. "I'll wait for you outside."

I went to the waiting room and sat down for a while, before growing impatient and deciding to go outside. I pulled out my phone, dialing Edward and pacing anxiously as I waited for him to answer.

"She's having a boy. I'm getting a brother," I blurted out in the sudden excitement that came over me.

He laughed. "You seem pleased."

"I am," I said in awe. "I don't know when it happened, but sometime while I was in that room, I got happy about it."

"I knew you would."

Reneé came barreling out the doors with Phil hot on her heels. She turned around and started talking to him, furiously waving her arms around as she said what was on her mind. Phil argued back passionately, and then, amazingly, put his hands on my mother's small bump in a pleading fashion. And to my astonishment, Reneé--my unconventional, indecisive mother--melted in his arms.

"Holy fuck, I think my mother's in love."

"With the father?" Edward questioned.

"Yeah. You should see them. It's..." They kissed, and I looked away, not wanting to intrude on the moment. "Wow."

"When can I expect you back? I don't like being away from you," he said softly into the phone. "I feel... off."

I smiled with the sentiment. "As soon as I tell her about you. I promise."

I shoved the phone in my pocket just as Reneé started walking over to me. "Sorry, Bella. He's-"

"No explanation necessary," I interjected. "Want some lunch? My treat?"

"What are you trying to butter me up for?" she asked with a quick grin.

"You'll see." I walked over to the Audi and saw Reneé stop abruptly. "What?"

"When did you get that?"

"Yesterday. It was given to me by Edward as a bonus." She arched her brow. "It's going on my taxes, don't worry."

"What happened to the Volvo?" she asked as she got in the passenger's side.

I started the engine and pulled out of the parking space, explaining the story as I drove us to lunch. I wove my way through traffic, while she laughed at the absurdity of the situation. I pulled in a parking space and it occurred to me that my mother had matured in the last few weeks. She was still absentminded, but it wasn't as debilitating as it once was. She wasn't grating on my nerves like she typically did with her moronic comments and warped view on life.

We sat down and Reneé immediately started munching on a piece of bread from the basket. "What did you want to talk to me about?"

"Well, my job. More specifically, who I work for," I replied vaguely.

"Okay," she said slowly.

"Um, Edward tries to make sure his personal life stays private. He doesn't want things being leaked out into the press," I said pointedly.

"And?"

"I will kidnap your son and give him to some strange couple in Milwaukee if you tell anyone this."

She rolled her eyes. "Stop with the dramatics. Are you seeing him?"

I nodded. "And I was wondering if you're doing anything this weekend so that you could meet him."

"No, I'm not doing anything." She beamed at me. "Are you two that serious? Serious enough to meet the parents?"

"Yeah," I answered with a smile.

She giggled. "I get to meet Edward Masen. Oh, the girls are going to be so jealous of me."

"Just keep in mind he's involved with your daughter," I warned playfully.

"Jesus. What kind of woman do you take me for?"

"The kind that slept around a lot when I was a child," I retorted.

She sat back and crossed her arms over her chest. "Now, that's just insulting."

I laughed once, because she couldn't deny it. "Whatever."

"Can we order now? Your brother is not very patient when it comes to food."

"Most babies aren't, are they?"

She shook her head and smiled at me. "No. They're not."

* * *

I sat in Edward's office with my face buried in my Am Lit notes, when I heard Edward's dog snort beside me. I looked down at the dog disdainfully as he licked his massive jowls. He whined once and nudged himself closer to me, making me scoot my chair away from him in a direct reaction.

I took a deep breath and leaned down so that I was eye to eye with the monster. "We both love Edward. So we need to get along. If I try, you have to try, too. That means no jumping, barking, or slobbering on me. Got it?"

He barked in my face, his hot breath stifling me.

"Now see, you screwed up already. Let's try this again. No jumping, barking, or slobbering. M'Kay?" He stayed silent. "Okay."

I tentatively reached out and patted the top of his head and heard Edward's warm chuckle behind me.

"Making deals with my dog, are we?" he asked lightly as he crossed the room.

I shrugged and blushed. "Kind of."

His hand cupped the back of my neck as he leaned over me. "And what are you studying now?"

"American Literature notes," I said in a drab voice, making him smile. "I have to turn in my seminar essay Monday for my final. I haven't even started working on it yet." I looked up at him balefully. "_Someone's _been distracting me for the last couple days."

"I wonder who that could be." He pretended to think about it and shrugged. "Come to bed. It's late."

I glanced down at the clock and saw it was nearly midnight. "No, I should go home. I'm really not interested in wearing these clothes for the third day in a row tomorrow."

"Come on, love. We'll throw them in the wash," he coaxed. "Warm bed, you, naked, in my arms. You've not stayed here at this house yet." He ran the tip of his nose along my jaw and placed a soft kiss just below my ear, sending a chill down my spine.

"Twenty-five pages, Edward. A twenty-five page essay due on Monday and I've not typed a single word," I reminded him.

"Use my laptop. No funny business, I promise."

I narrowed my eyes. "I don't believe you."

"I'll let you borrow one of my shirts to sleep in so that you can cover up all that tempting flesh." He flashed me a lopsided smile, causing me to lose focus on the argument.

I swayed in my seat as I looked up into his green eyes. "I hate it when you do that," I said breathlessly.

"Do what?" he asked curiously.

"Stun me with your gorgeousness."

He laughed loudly and kissed me quickly. "Does that mean I've won?"

"This time," I conceded.

I got up and stripped out of my clothes while Edward watched me in bewildered silence. Once I was naked, I gathered my notes and picked up my clothes.

"Laundry?" I asked, cocking my brow.

He swallowed convulsively. "You just made it extremely difficult not to touch you, you know."

"Did I? How 'bout that shirt?" I asked with a grin.

"I'll be good," he said wickedly. "Tonight." He held out his hand to me. "Let's get your clothes washed. You know, it might be a good idea to put some things of yours in a bag and keep it in your car. I have an extra toothbrush and you're more than welcome to use my shampoo and soap, but unless you want to wear my clothes home, announcing to everyone you're doing the... What do they call it?"

"The walk of shame?" I giggled.

"That's it. The walk of shame. You're welcome to do the walk of shame from my house any time," he said lowly.

"It's not shameful if you're involved with the person."

"No one has to know that." His eyes met mine and held, speeding my breath up and causing my heart to beat furiously in my chest before he quickly broke away. "Give me those and meet me in my room. Pick out whatever you'd like from the closet."

"You're doing my laundry?" I asked in mock shock.

"I'm doing your laundry." He playfully slapped his hand over his mouth and widened those incredible green eyes of his. "Your ridiculously tiny knickers are in my hand."

"You're too funny sometimes," I said with a laugh.

I went into his bedroom and grabbed a plain black t-shirt that was folded neatly on one of the cedar shelves and brushed my teeth before climbing into his huge, wrought iron bed and curling up under the slate gray comforter.

Edward came in a few minutes later and handed me his laptop before he disappeared in the bathroom. He came out wearing nothing but a pair of green plaid pajama pants and climbed in next to me.

I could feel the intense energy surrounding us, impatiently humming as we each tried to ignore each other. I worked on my paper for an hour, knocking out eight pages of fairly well-written summarizations, before Edward leaned over and pressed a kiss to my shoulder.

"You write well," he commented, gazing over my shoulder.

I crooked my neck to see him and nearly had a stroke. He'd slipped on a pair of glasses at some point while I was staring at the computer screen. They weren't just any glasses. They were these thick, tortoise shell frames that made his eyes pop behind the lenses.

I gasped soflty. "Shit."

"What? Are you all right?"

I nodded. Then shook my head. I didn't know. All I knew is that I had this intense desire to throw the laptop on the floor and climb on top of him before I sunk down on his...

"You... I... That... Me... Hmm," I stammered. "Glasses."

"You like glasses?"

"Just yours."

He chuckled and took them off. "Can you think now?"

I took in a loud breath. "It is better, yes. But the image is still there." I looked down at a large, bounded stack of papers. "What are you reading?"

"Script."

I frowned. "You're looking to do a movie again? Already?"

"Not particularly." He moved the laptop off to the nightstand and then pulled me down into the bed, lying next to me. "Serious conversation here."

I bit my lip. "Yeah?"

"How would you feel about me no longer acting? Retiring," he asked carefully.

"Retiring? That makes you seem so old."

"It would mean that once my obligations for _Rogue_ are finished, I'd be free to live a life with you. Out of the public eye."

I couldn't pinpoint exactly what he meant by spending a life with me. And so I got scared. My palms started sweating and my heart knocked in my chest as I started wheezing. I tensed up and slowly began backing away from him.

"Relax, Bella. I'm not proposing!" he shouted, partially worried, partially annoyed.

I took in a deep, calming breath. "Sorry."

"Would it be that awful to marry me?"

"No?" It came out as a question because I wasn't sure. Normally, I would have given an immediate yes as an answer to that question; I wanted to be nothing like Reneé and Charlie. But with Edward, I couldn't seem to get the word out.

He rolled his eyes. "I'm simply talking to you about this. You have as much to say about it as I do."

"How long would that take?"

"About a year, I suppose? _Rogue_ is set to premiere in May, but it would take some time for the interest in me to die down," he answered honestly.

"And then we could-"

"Be free to walk around the streets and_ live_, Bella," he said passionately, scanning my face for some idea of how I felt.

"You would give everything up for me?" I asked softly.

"I would give it up to be happy. I think we can be happy, Bella."

There were no scary promises of engagements, weddings, and babies. Just the promise of me and him in his eyes. I'd reacted completely irrationally.

"I think we can, too."

* * *

**Edward**

I unlocked the door to the room adjoining my bedroom and slipped inside, shutting the door behind me quietly so that I didn't wake Bella. I turned on the lights and looked around at the various awards littering the shelves. A couple Oscars, Golden Globes, and things like MTV Movie Awards and Teen Choice Awards filled the room. They were all nice, but my main focus now was the black baby grand piano sitting in the center of the room.

I sat on the bench and ran my fingers over the smooth, familiar ivory keys. I meant every word I said about leaving the business so that I could be with Bella. There were a handful of people I could think of that wouldn't be pleased with the news, my agent, Royce, being the main person, but none of it mattered. The only thing that seemed to matter anymore was waking up to Bella's snarled hair brushing against my cheek and the feel of her lying in my arms. My future was with Bella now, in whatever form was available to me.

I hoped that when I met her mother, I'd solve the mystery to Bella's unfounded fear of marriage and children. Because those two things were things I would specifically need sooner or later.

I ran scales, warming up my hands, until my fingers felt loose and quick, stopping only because I was uncertain of what I wanted to play.

I heard the click of the door behind me and turned to see Bella staring at the room in wonder.

"You have a piano. In your bedroom," she stated in disbelief. "And trophies that most people only see on TV."

"What's the problem?" I asked curiously. "I like to play; you know that. I keep everything in here locked up because I don't necessarily trust some of the people who come into my home. New employees, housekeepers, even guests at some of the parties I've been forced to host all hold potential to steal or destroy something of mine."

She walked around the room, looking at pictures I had on the shelves of my family. "I'll tell you what the problem is." She gulped. "Piano sex."

"You want to defile my piano?" She nodded, sending a wave of heat rolling through me. "God, that sounds fantastic. Why didn't I think of that?"

"You lack imagination." She came over to me and straddled my waist, throwing me a sexy smile. "Play something, Edward," she said in a breathy voice that had my pecker stirring in my trousers at once.

"I have imagination," I argued, moving my hands around her and placing them on the keys. "I still haven't had you on the hood of my car."

She scoffed. "Car sex. Everyone does it."

"Aston Martin sex," I corrected. "Which will be followed shortly after by Bentley, Audi, and Ferrari sex."

"So ambitious," she whispered in my ear.

"When need be," I answered thickly.

I began moving my fingers along the keys, playing Tchaikovsky as well as I could around Bella's waist.

She nipped on my neck, causing me to falter once, and I felt her smile against my skin. "_Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy_," she murmured.

"It is Christmas time."

Her mouth moved down my body achingly slow, taunting and teasing me as she made her way down my chest and abdomen. She kneeled on the floor in between my legs and tugged at the hem of my trousers. I lifted my hips for her and let her slide them down my legs in a fluid movement.

Her mouth moved to the inside of my thighs and I stopped playing as I bent my head down to watch her unconsciously. "Don't stop playing," she instructed.

I racked my hazy brain for something appropriate to play and settled on something Liszt, because it was one of the hardest pieces I knew. My fingers flew across the keys as Bella made her way up my thighs. She wrapped her hot mouth around me, and I dropped my hands, spitting out a hiss from between my teeth as she worked me into her mouth. I groaned, picking my hands back up, and played, hitting sour notes every time she sucked down on me or swirled her tongue around the tip.

I watched her, no longer worried about the song. I watched her head bob up and down on my shaft, taking me in as far as she could, nearly losing it each time I hit the back of her throat.

And then she did something extraordinary with her teeth as she came back up, pushing me over the edge. I slammed my hands down on the keys with a strangled cry and gripped onto the piano tightly as the aching fire pulsed through me, shooting out into her mouth without warning.

I grabbed her and lifted her up, wanting nothing more than to toss her onto the piano, but settled for merely sitting her on the keys and hearing the disorganized chords echo loudly throughout the room, where I ripped the shirt over her head and feasted on her as I... recovered. I took every part of her into my mouth I could find and ran my hands over her glistening skin as she grew more and more pliant with need.

I trailed my fingers along her slit then circled her clit slowly, causing her to moan lowly and drop her head back with pleasure. She arched her back when I dipped my fingers inside her, pushing her breasts out towards me and causing me to lose any sense of chivalry I had left in my now frazzled mind.

I gripped her legs tightly, almost digging my fingers into the skin, and pushed her legs apart. I drove into her deeply and felt her tense up as she gasped when I was in to the hilt. I pulled my hips back and repeated the movement, keeping her legs as far apart as I could and taking her mouth with mine in a bruising kiss.

"Tell me it's me, Bella," I said darkly against her lips. "That I'm the only one who can make you feel this way."

"Oh, God," she cried out. "It's you." She looked like she wanted to say more but couldn't get the words out.

I grunted and slammed into her again, lifting her up and bringing her back down onto the piano with a loud clanking of the keys. I released her legs and held onto the top of the piano, using it for leverage as I thrust into her in reckless abandon.

I was being devoured by the insatiable urge to claim her as my own, fill her with all of me--my body, my mind, my soul. To make her feel the way I did when we were joined together--consumed. Her muscles clamped down on me and she grabbed my hips, pulling me into her even further, before she bit down on my shoulder and came hard.

A low growl built in my chest as the blood roared in my veins. With one last thrust, I came inside her, and nearly collapsed with the force of it.

I swallowed hard and rested my head against her chest as I struggled to catch my breath. "You're not allowed in this room with me again. You nearly killed me, love."

"What?" she asked with a laugh. "Why?"

"You were on my piano," I said simply. "And I lost control."

"Baby?" she asked, raising my face to hers. "Feel free to lose control anytime you want."

I laughed and gave her a soft kiss before breaking away from her.

She sat on the bench and patted the space next to her. "Play something for me. Seriously this time."

I finished wiping down the keys and nodded. "All right."

My fingers moved slowly over the keys as I began to play Rachmaninoff's Adagio sostenuto movement. I glanced over and saw Bella watching my hands intently as the piece built and the tempo increased. When my hands began moving over the keys quickly, her mouth dropped open and her eyes widened. I got to a breaking point and stopped, because the piece was over ten minutes long.

"You are incredible," she breathed.

I smiled at her. "I practiced a lot as a child. My mother actually got me into it when I was about six and I fell in love with it. The music, the sound, the techniques. This specific concerto piece has orchestra parts as well. It's much better when you listen to it all at once."

"I've never listened to classical music, other than at ballets. I thought it was boring. But that was beautiful." She grinned at me. "One of these days, I'm going to make you sit down and play everything you know."

"Let's pace ourselves, love. I'd rather not cramp my fingers. I do use those for other things," I said seductively, kissing her jaw.

"You're meeting my mom later. Maybe we should go get ready?"

"Maybe we should."

* * *

I led Bella into the garage and opened the passenger's side door of the Audi for her.

She looked at me curiously as she got in. "No Bond car today?"

I shook my head. "I'm in the mood to drive the R8 this afternoon."

I quickly sped down the drive and saw Jessica coming outside to get her mail. "Get down," I hissed at Bella.

She immediately sunk down in her seat so that no one could see her and burst out laughing. "This is fucking ridiculous."

I waved at Jessica as I pulled out of the drive and glanced over at Bella. "Tell me about it," I muttered.

"Two words for you Edward," she said as she popped back up. "Tinted windows."

"I just got this car. But I'd still make you get down," I joked. "I can't be seen with the likes of you."

She rolled her eyes and shot her hand out to slap me. "Shut up, ass, or I'll jump out at the next light and start screaming that Edward Masen kidnapped me."

I chuckled. "So where am I going?"

She told me how to get to her mother's apartment and then turned on the radio, switching through the stations until she found a rock station. I watched her bob her head to the angry music while she texted Rosalie back and forth, letting her know what her plans were so that she didn't worry.

I gently took her arm and rubbed my thumb in soothing circles at the pulse point on her wrist while I drove my way through the city. I glanced in my rear view mirror and then did a double take.

"Fuck!" I yelled, slapping my hand on the wheel.

Bella looked at me with concern. "Fuck? You never say that. What's wrong?"

"I'm being followed. I can't go into your mother's apartment building with you without raising questions." I looked back angrily. "Shit!"

Her face fell as she peeked behind us and saw the black SUV tailing me. "I guess you can meet her some other time," she said sadly.

"No, I'm meeting her today," I said adamantly. "I'll just have to figure something out."

I drove the rest of the way to her mother's in silence, my mind racing through ways that I could make this work without anyone thinking anything of it. She pointed at the entrance to the complex and I turned in, furious that I still hadn't come up with an answer.

I parked the car and turned to look at her. "I'll be back. I don't know how, but I'll be back. I promise."

I squeezed her hand just before she opened the door and grabbed her messenger bag. "I'll get some more of that essay typed up while I wait. Call me if you can't get back and I need to have Reneé take me back to my place."

I nodded and watched her disappear into the door just to the left of the steps and then pulled out of the parking space, annoyed that the photographers had chosen this specific day to follow me.

I wound through the city, looking for a way to escape them. I could out run them easily in this car, but then that would raise suspicion. Because I was never one to shy away from the press that was involved with this life.

I ran my hand through my hair and sighed. I drove like I was going back home, glancing all around me, practically grasping straws as I tried to figure out where to go next and how to get back to Bella, when something caught my eye. A simple car dealership.

I quickly got off the freeway with a wide smile on my face.

I parked the Audi and got out, walking into the showroom. A young salesman with blond hair came over to me, smiling pleasantly, but looking absolutely terrified at the same time.

"Hello, can I help you with something today?" he asked through his false smile. He may have said his name as well, but I wasn't paying attention. I was too busy watching the black SUV that had just pulled in next to my Audi.

"You can relax," I said easily. "I want to test drive that." I pointed to a canary yellow Porsche sitting in the lot.

"She's a beauty. Let me get the keys for you."

I waited until he was out of sight and then went back outside. I rapped on the window of the SUV and put on my most dazzling smile.

"Hello," I said pleasantly. "Listen, I'm going to take that baby for a spin right there." I pointed back to the Porsche. "There's absolutely no reason for you all to sit here the entire time. Especially if I decide to buy her."

The photographer looked at me warily. "I don't know," he said slowly.

"Go pick up some lunch and wait for me. I can't just leave my Audi here." They looked between each other. "Come on, gentlemen. You know I've never given you any problems getting shots of me."

"No." He gave me a curious look. "What are you doing slumming it, anyway? And who was that girl you dropped off?"

"My assistant," I answered honestly, keeping my face blank. "She needed a ride. I gave her one."

He tapped on the wheel as he thought about it. "I could go for something to eat."

"Yeah, dude. I'm fucking famished," the other one chimed in.

I held up my hand in a wave. "See you."

I walked back to the salesman and smiled in apology. "Sorry about that, they follow me wherever I go."

He jerked his head in a nod and started towards the Porsche. "I understand. I'm a huge fan myself, Mr. Masen."

I clapped his back with my hand. "That's great news, mate, because I'm going to need your help with something."

He looked at me in surprise as he handed me the keys. "What's that?"

I looked around the parking lot and saw the photographers still watching me. "Get in," I instructed.

As soon as we were both in the car, I pulled out of the lot, and watched the SUV pull out behind me.

"Christ," I hissed to myself.

I watched them in the mirror, growing more and more anxious with each passing moment, before the SUV finally turned to go to a fast food restaurant.

I breathed a huge sigh of relief and turned my attention to the salesman who was spouting off the car's specs to me. "...has five hundred horsepower and goes zero to sixty in three-point-five seconds-"

"I don't care. I'll buy the bloody car as long as you keep your mouth shut, understand? You work on commission?" He nodded. "Then you'll get the commission on this. Quite a hefty Christmas bonus, don't you think?"

He cleared his throat nervously. "What exactly are we doing, Mr. Masen?"

"Evading," I told him. "They followed me to... a friend's flat. A friend who would rather be kept out of the press. " I turned off towards Reneé's apartment. "You're going to drop me off at that flat and then drive yourself back to the dealership where you'll start all the paperwork so that when I come back to pick up my Audi, all I have to do is write the check and sign for the car." I gave him a dangerous look. "If you so much as breathe a word of any of this to anyone, I'll make sure you regret it."

"All right," he said shakily.

"Tell me, how easily can I have this shipped to Texas?"

"Oh, very easily, sir. All you have to do is pay the destination charge and we can have it loaded up and on a flat-bed in the morning."

I nodded. "Then that's what we'll do."

I parked the car at Reneé's building and got out. I watched the salesman adjust the seat and drive out of view before I went to her flat. I knocked on the door lightly and was welcomed to the sight of Bella throwing open the door with a hopeful expression on her face.

"How did you get here?"

"I bought a Porsche." I ran my hand through my hair. "More specifically, I bought Alice a Porsche for Christmas." She gave me a strange look. "I'll explain it all later."

My mobile buzzed in my pocket and I answered it without even looking at the ID.

"Merry Christmas," I laughed.

"Thank you, thank you!" Alice squealed into my ear. "I love you!"

"I know you do. But you have Bella to thank for this large gift as well. If I hadn't been trying to evade the press, you would have gotten something dreadful instead. Like a boring black scarf."

"I want to hear about it all later. Have a good time. And Edward?" I waited for her to continue. "Be polite."

"That sounds... promising," I said dryly as I put the mobile back in my pocket.

"Coming in?" Bella asked, standing at the threshold.

"Absolutely."


	11. Chapter 11

**OK--a big shout out goes to athena-apollo for the jaguar comment. I have been looking for some place to use it since that review on chapter 1 and I finally got it in here! I LOVED it!**

**There's a lot of expectations on Renee and Edward's meeting. I hope this meets them all...**

**Thanks for the reviews and I hope everyone has a Merry Christmas! I'll update this again after the holiday :)**

* * *

Chapter 11

**Edward**

"Oh, my God!" Renée squealed, rushing over to me. "You're so much better looking in person!"

She grabbed my face in her hands and put her mouth on mine. My eyebrows shot up with my muffled oath against her mouth, and I placed my hands on her shoulders, gently pushing her away.

"Thank you," I said as graciously as I could manage.

Now I knew exactly why Alice had warned me to be polite.

"Renée!" Bella hissed. "You're a forty-one-year-old pregnant lady hitting on my boyfriend. Please stop embarrassing yourself." She looked mortally embarrassed herself.

She waved her off. "I wasn't hitting on him. I just got excited." She gave me a sheepish grin. "Sorry about that."

I cleared my throat. "It's fine."

I glanced around the small, white apartment and noticed dream catchers in the windows, quartz, Chinese crystal clusters, and other various stones all over the room, incense burning in the corner smelling heavily of sandalwood and jasmine, and spiritual art in focal points of the rooms.

I felt entirely out of place.

"Nice flat," I said casually.

"No, it's not, but thanks for lying anyways." She waved encouragingly at me. "Sit down. Dinner's almost ready."

"You cooked?" Bella asked fearfully. "Oh, shit. This is going to be great." She gave me an apologetic look. "I hope you don't wind up with food poisoning or something."

I merely arched my brow in response.

Renée walked into the small galley kitchen, and I noticed how much Bella looked like her, moved like her. She had her father's coloring but her facial structure and body was much like her mother's. She was beautiful, just like her daughter.

"You look like her," I murmured into Bella's neck.

She leaned into me. "Scared yet?"

I chuckled. "I had a moment there, yes."

"It's not over yet," she said, straightening up as Renée came back into the room.

"So, Edward? I had no idea you were English. When did you move here?"

"About fifteen years ago," I replied.

Her blue eyes widened. "Really? How old are you, exactly?"

"Does it matter?"

"No, I suppose not," she mused. "Phil's thirty. You look around the same age."

I actually blushed. It seemed it was more appropriate for Bella to date her mother's boyfriend while I dated her mother.

I fought with the shudder that tried to rip down my spine with that specific thought.

_Could this be any more absurd?_

"I'm a bit older than that, actually." I gripped onto Bella's hand. "How did you meet Phil?"

"Yoga class. Phil's a mechanic, and he was having problems with one of his shoulders. His sister suggested yoga to loosen him up and he took the same class as me. We went home together one night and then wound up with this little guy." She patted her stomach.

"Bella mentioned something about the baby being a boy. Congratulations," I said genuinely.

A loud knock on the door interrupted the conversation. "Oh, that's Phil."

Renée rushed over to the door and stood behind it, giggling at Phil on the other side.

I leaned in to Bella and whispered into her ear with a crooked grin. "Your mum's a cougar."

"And that would make you a what? Jaguar?"

I smiled widely. "Is that what I'm called?"

She made a cat's meowing sound just before she kissed me. I laughed against her mouth. "Shut up, Masen. I'm trying to do something here."

"Sorry," I murmured, still smiling.

She kissed me deeply, wrapping her arms around my neck and scooting in closer to me, sending a ball of heat to the pit of my stomach. I was no longer aware of my surroundings, but I was aware of the time I'd spent with Bella's lips locked against mine.

Just as I started to pull away, a bright flash lit up the room. Bella abruptly pulled back with a groan.

"Fuck me," she said in irritation. "You seriously had to get a picture of me making out with my boyfriend?" she asked hotly.

"Oh relax, sis. It's not every day Edward Masen sits in my living room kissing my daughter. I had do something to immortalize the moment." Renée shrugged

"You're not allowed to show anyone that. As far as all your little girlfriends are concerned, you're meeting my boss." Bella looked at Renée pointedly.

"I know!"

"Sis?" I asked quietly.

"Sister of solidarity or some shit. I don't know. She started calling me that when she started this weird hippie-new age bullshit faze she's in now. She's become an avid believer in holistic medicine--going to a doula instead of an actual obstetrician-- vegetarianism, and balancing your chi." She made a prayer sign with her hands and rolled her eyes. "I keep praying that she'll find something else to do, but so far, God isn't listening. I mean, there's nothing wrong with it, but she's just gone to the extreme with it."

"Maybe you should pray harder, " I suggested playfully.

"Maybe you should pray with me," she countered.

I glanced up and saw Phil hovering over us with an excited smile on his face. "Hello," I said politely. "You must be Phil." I stood up and extended my hand.

"Yeah. Edward Masen. Shit, you...you're ... awesome," he stammered.

"Thanks." I glanced back and Bella and winked. "Excited to be a father?" I inquired.

"Yeah. I just wish Renée would let me in. She's hell bent on doing everything herself. She won't even let me put the crib together. It's still in pieces against the wall."

"I see." I smirked at Bella. It seemed she got a bit more than just her looks from her mother.

We talked a bit more until Renée announced that dinner was ready. I followed Bella into the kitchen and sat down, looking at the food scattered over the table warily. It looked decent, but Bella's words about learning how to cook at such a young age were haunting me.

Once everyone had served themselves, I made my own plate and took a bite of the salad. The dressing tasted a bit sour, but it was tolerable. After I'd finished that, I took a bite of my bread, and noticed it had a burnt taste to it. I flipped it over and saw that it had been burned on the bottom. I sat down the bread and picked at the vegetable casserole Renée had made. There were mushrooms, squash, zucchini, carrots, tofu, and noodles in some sort of light sauce. After a deep breath, I took a bite, fervently wishing once it was in my mouth that I never had.

I looked around the room and moved it to my cheek, determined to chew it and swallow it down, but I couldn't do it. It seemed entirely obvious to spit it in my napkin and horribly rude not to eat it.

I turned around in my chair and pretended to look out the window. "Bella?" I whispered. "You know I don't usually use this word in normal conversation..."

"Yeah?" she asked softly, watching to make sure Renée and Phil weren't paying attention.

"But what the fuck am I eating? It's... inedible."

"Spit it into your napkin," she hissed at me.

"What?" I asked incredulously. "No."

"Yes. She'll never notice." I stared blankly at her. "I promise."

I turned around and held my napkin to my face, silently spitting the rancid food out into it.

Bella held out my glass of wine, and I nearly drank the entire thing as I tried to get the awful taste out of my mouth.

Bella and I managed to make it through dinner without Renée noticing that our forks were empty every time we put them to our mouths and that we were dropping food into the napkins in our laps to make it look like we were eating--she was too wrapped up in Phil to see. We stole glances at one another the entire time, nearly bursting into laughter every time our eyes met.

Bella and I hastily got out of our seats and pretended to be full as we scraped the rest of our food in the trash and stealthily threw the food in the napkins out while Renée wasn't looking. Bella took the napkins to the laundry room and put them in the washer with some other items of Renée's, while I washed our plates in the sink.

"You didn't have to do that!" Renée scolded.

"It's no problem. Honestly." I put the last dish in the rack.

She smiled at me. "So, how's the sex? Pretty good? Mind-blowing?"

"Erm..." I shifted on my feet uncomfortably. "I don't typically discuss my sex life," I said, avoiding the general question. "As a rule."

"Why the hell not? Bella won't tell me anything."

"For good reason, " Bella interjected as she walked back into the room. "You're my mother, whether you act like it or not."

Renée gave Bella a flippant wave. "Come on, sis. Give me something. I'm dying here with all these hormones raging through my body."

"There's a perfectly good man out there to fix that," Bella said, pointing out to the living room where Phil was waiting.

"I don't want to sleep with Phil."

"Why? Afraid that if you fuck him you'll realize you're in love with him?" Bella asked heatedly.

"Bella, I-" She shot me a glare, and I immediately shut up. "Right."

"Because you can't be afraid to get pregnant," she continued. "Not anymore. What are you so scared of?"

"I could ask you the same thing, Bella," Renée countered, looking between the two of us.

"You want to get into this now?" Bella took a gulp of her wine, even though I was fairly certain she had more than enough liquid courage since her face was so beautifully flushed. "All right. You've gone around sleeping with whomever you pleased my entire life, not giving a single shit about me. I had to learn to take care of myself because half the time, you couldn't even remember to set the alarm for school or do the laundry. And now you want to act like you don't know why I am the way I am? It's bullshit."

Renée looked stunned. "I didn't know you felt so strongly about me being your mother."

Her eyes welled with tears and Bella snapped. "Stop with the tears. I don't even get to call you 'mom', so don't play the mother card with me. I'm full of fucking flaws because of you and he loves me anyway. He loves what I've made of myself--what I'm making of myself. And it's of absolutely no credit to you. Until two months ago, I didn't think there was anyone out there who would love someone as fucked up as I am."

"You're not fucked up," she said adamantly.

Bella's eyes went glassy while I helplessly stood there, wanting nothing more than to comfort her, but knew she needed to purge herself of this. "No? Sure feels like it. I'm scared out of my damn mind about loving him. I'm scared of marriage and babies and all that shit that I know he wants. And why is that, do you think? Maybe because I'm a child of divorce? And that my parents haven't said a single word to one another since I was old enough to get on a plane and fly to Port Angeles myself? Because I lived with my mother and had to learn how to ride a bike by myself and teach myself to drive? Because I had to learn how to do algebra on my own and learn how to cook so that I didn't starve?"

"You hate me?" she asked softly, wringing her hands in front of her.

"No, of course I don't hate you. I love you. As crazy as it seems. Because you are the only mother I have." She took a calming breath. "So now you know my reasoning. What's yours?"

"I know I was a terrible mother to you. I'm hoping I'll be a better mother to your brother. And I'm sorry." She flicked her eyes to me and then back at her hands. "I honestly don't know what's wrong with me. Indecision? Fear of being trapped?"

"That's fucking stupid."

Her lips twitched with the smile she was holding in. "Maybe. So are you done telling me off now?"

Bella lifted one side of her lips in a half-smile. "I think so."

"Good. Because I'd like to open our gifts now."

Renée went into the living room, and I didn't hesitate to take Bella into my arms. "What was that?"

"Alcohol induced anger," she answered. "It's why I don't get drunk. Although, I've obviously had too much wine today."

"You didn't eat with it." I kissed her forehead.

"Still want to be with me? Even though I may never be ready for what you want?" she asked shakily.

"I love you, Bella. Flaws and all," I said passionately. "You'll get there one day." She scoffed. "You will. And I'll be waiting impatiently for that day to arrive."

She stood up on her toes and kissed me. "I love you. I'm sorry you had to see that," she said, blushing.

I wasn't. I wanted to know why Bella was afraid of being committed to me, and now I knew. I was going to show her in everything I did, every word I said, that being committed to me was nothing to be afraid of. And pray that one day, she'd wrap her stubborn brain around it.

"What do you say we finish Christmas with them so we can go pick up something to eat and maybe get some water and aspirin in you?" I asked softly.

"Okay."

We eventually made it into the living room to exchange presents. I let Bella open our present from Renée and had to bite down on the inside of my cheek to keep from laughing at her reaction. She pulled the massage oils, candles, and crystals, biting her lips and concentrating on not making some sarcastic comment out loud.

She thanked her mother and then leaned in to me, placing a soft kiss on my jaw. "Let's go. I'm starving."

"Still pissed?" I asked, kissing her cheek.

She grinned. "Not anymore. In either context."

Bella called a taxi to take us back to my Audi. When it arrived, we both said our goodbyes and darted out the door. As soon as we were both safely in the confines of the taxi, we both burst into a fit of laughter, unable to calm down until we were nearly to the car dealership.

"Did she give us fucking patchouli oil?" I nodded. "Jesus. Why don't you grow some dreads and get some bongos. I'll score us some weed and we'll be all set."

I laughed some more. "It wasn't that bad. We can make good use of the oils and candles," I said lowly.

Bella's eyes flickered to the taxi driver and then back at me. "Thank you for meeting my mother, even though she's insane."

I interlaced her fingers with mine and brought her hand to my lap. "She's not insane. Just... different."

I paid the driver, giving him a absurdly large tip in hopes that he'd keep his mouth shut about driving me to the dealership, and then got out with Bella. I stood in the parking lot with my hands in my pockets, afraid that if I had them out, I'd touch Bella in front of all these people.

"Want to come inside and practice being indifferent towards me?" I asked with a crooked grin.

"Only if you don't argue with me when I go home tonight to spend some time with Rosalie and get some studying done."

I reluctantly agreed. "All right."

* * *

**Bella**

I got home after the long day I'd had at my mother's and plopped my ass on the couch, reaching into the bag of chips Rosalie was munching on and swiped a few for myself.

"Bad day?" Rosalie asked, sliding her gaze away from the TV and on me.

"I yelled at my mom. In front of... her boyfriend."

"What did she do?"

"Nothing, that's the problem." I sighed. "I told her how much of a fucking disaster of a mom she is."

"Ouch. Bet that went over well."

"Actually, she agreed with me. But I still feel like a jerk."

Rosalie shifted her body towards me. "Bella? Why didn't you move in with Charlie when you were younger? Break away from your mom and the string of men?"

"Honestly?" She nodded. "Because she needed me. And even though I was a child, our roles were kind of reversed. I took care of her. I was the adult. The one who cooked and cleaned, picked up dry cleaning, made sure the lights didn't get shut off, woke her up for work."

"Sweetie, you lost your whole fucking childhood to that cow."

"I know," I groaned. "And it's completely fucked me up."

"Is this why you won't date?" I knit my brows with confusion. "You find something wrong with everyone and you never give them a chance."

I wanted nothing more than to tell her that I'd found someone I was willing to risk it all for, but couldn't.

_Fucking shit, this secret thing sucks._

"Possibly." I shoved another chip in my mouth. "Why aren't you with Emmett?"

"He has a lab exam on Monday that he's at Newton's studying for. He asks about you, you know."

I shook my head. "No thanks."

"Not even one date?"

"NO," I said firmly. "I'm not interested in Mike fucking Newton." Or anyone else but Edward for that matter.

"Okay, okay." She held her hands up in defense. "Not Mike Newton."

"I'm going to go to bed. It's been a long weekend." _Of no sleep and lots of sex._ I had to concentrate on not giddily giggling with the thought.

I got my face washed, teeth brushed, and changed into my pajamas and then laid down and curled up under the covers, but couldn't fall asleep, no matter how tired I was. My brain was too busy thinking about today and how unbelievably shitty I was to Renée, even though I knew in some way she deserved it.

Renée had been typical. I shouldn't be so humiliated by the way she acted this afternoon, after all, I warned him that she was unique. But I was. Not to mention completely ashamed of myself for getting drunk on two glasses of wine and then airing all my dirty laundry with my mother out in front of Edward and in ear-shot of Phil. And instead of running away screaming, in typical male behavior, Edward fucking stayed and told me he loved me and that he had enough faith in me to believe that one day, sometime in the future, I'd get my shit together and stop being so deathly afraid of getting married and having kids.

Even only a few hours of letting it all out, I could feel the shift beginning in me. That scary vision of red-headed babies and a ring on my finger wasn't nearly as frightening anymore.

_Huh._

I thought about my mother. And the vast differences between us. We were so entirely different, only sharing physical looks and a few traits. I was more like my father--the man who'd never given himself a second chance at love after Renée walked out on him. Whatever his reasons, he loved her, and even though I knew he wasn't lonely, he was alone.

And I wasn't.

"Jesus, why am I constantly fighting this thing?" I asked in wonder.

I would never be alone--that much was certain--so what was the difference between being with Edward for the rest of my life and marrying Edward? Absolutely nothing except a ring and a piece of paper, legally binding us together.

But we were so closely and irreversibly bound together already, a piece of paper was nothing but a statement anymore. He was willing to give up everything he'd worked his entire life for, if it meant he could be with me. If it meant we could be happy. He was steady, consistent, so sure of his unwavering love for me.

And while I may still think I was too young to get married, I knew that whenever he asked me, my answer would without a doubt be yes. I wasn't my mother and he wasn't my father, so why the hell would I ever think we could end up like them? We were on our own path, heading into the unknown and hazy future together.

He happened to come into my life and changed everything--for the better. I could stand here and be afraid of that unknown path into the future, or I could let it go and just _be_.

With a light heart and a wide grin, I chose to let it go.

That fairy tale, the happily ever after, came back to me in full force as I did. The gorgeous white house stood in the background, while Edward and I ran around in the plush, green grass with his monstrous dog and two little androgynous copper-haired babies. And instead of feeling fear, I felt an intense yearning for that scene.

I pulled my phone off the charge and called my mother, apologizing for my behavior and then spending a few minutes talking about Phil and the baby. After I let her go, I dialed Edward's number, desperately needing to hear his voice after my little epiphany, and felt instantly soothed when I heard his warm, velvety voice answer.

"Hi," I said thickly. "Talk to me until I fall asleep?"

"You miss me already?" he asked with a chuckle.

"I needed to hear your voice. I've had a bit of an emotional night," I breathed.

"Are you worried about your fight with your mother?" he asked in concern.

"No." I swallowed hard with the sudden nerves that racked my body. "I was thinking about us, actually."

"What about us?"

"I've said this before, but I'm saying it again. Maybe this time you'll actually believe me." I let out a nervous giggle.

"Just tell me, love. You're scaring me a bit."

"Sorry. I'm an idiot. And I'm not scared anymore."

"Scared of what?" I sat silent until he caught up with me. "Of us?"

"Of us," I repeated in confirmation. "I want it. I want you. A life, a family. Maybe not right away, but I want it."

"God, I wish you were here with me. I'd kiss your lips right off your face. You don't know how it feels to hear you say that. To know that you've finally caught up with me. I... I can't even think straight," he laughed.

He sounded so happy, I couldn't help the thrill that went through me with the knowledge that I did that for him.

* * *

"You know, I kind of like this color. It looks like the color of baby shit," I commented casually, as Rosalie, Emmett, and I painted the living room of our apartment.

"It does not look like baby shit!" Rosalie argued. "It's called grandiose."

"Ah, well, it's grandiosely hideous. I can't believe I agreed to let you paint the place I live this color!" I dipped the roller in the ugly paint and spread it over another section of the wall, hiding the creamy butter color it once was.

"I've gotta agree with Bond, babe. It's not that great," Emmett said, brushing along the trim.

"Fine," she huffed, throwing her roller down and slinging paint all over the dropcloth spread out on the floor. "Stop painting and I'll fucking get something else." She started to storm out of the living room.

"Oh, come on, Rose!" I yelled back, twisting on the ladder.

I lost my footing and flung my arms wildly in the air, trying fruitlessly to grasp onto something before I fell. I knocked the tray of paint over on my way down, causing it to fall upside down on my lap and splatter paint all over me.

Emmett and Rosalie froze, only to both start laughing hysterically at me. I stood up and gently pulled the tray off my pants and watched the paint drip down my jeans in long, olive-colored streams.

"Aw, shit," I groaned. My back ached where I landed on the floor with an ear-bleeding thud.

Emmett snorted with laughter. "It's not that bad."

"Yeah," Rosalie snickered. "You can barely tell."

"Fuck you," I sneered, wiping paint off my face with the back of my hand. "You two are on your own." My phone chirped noisily on the couch.

They both continued to make fun of me on the other side of the room while I stalked over to the couch and answered it.

"What?" I shouted into the receiver.

I was welcomed to more laughter on the line, huskily reverberating in my ear. "What the hell is the matter with you?" Jacob asked in between laughs.

"I'm covered in paint!" I yelled in response. This only made him laugh harder. "Ha ha, now that I've made your night better, can you just tell me what the fuck you want?"

"I want to invite you to a charity event."

My anger over having paint all over my body immediately diminished. "What?" I asked in shock.

"King Pictures is hosting their annual black and white ball on New Year's Eve and I need a date," he clarified. "Didn't Masen mention something about this?"

I vaguely remembered seeing something in his schedule that Gianna had entered about it, but hadn't given it much thought. "About you taking me to the ball? No, why the hell would he?" I was met by curious looks from Emmett and Rosalie.

"Very funny. Listen, I need a date. Edward is obligated to go with Tanya. It's a win-win situation here. You can go and spend time with your honey, and I don't have to look like a dick showing up alone. What do you say?"

"Can I talk to my boss about it before I give you my answer?" I responded.

"I take it you're not alone," Jacob deduced.

"No, I'm not."

"All right. But call me back tonight. I need to know if I need to ask one of those idiot girls I posed with in _Interview_ magazine the other day or not."

"Wow. What a shitty life you lead," I said wryly.

"Whatever. Call me back," he said, just before he abruptly hung up.

"So I'm going to take a shower," I said, inching my way to my door.

"No, you don't!" Rosalie said sharply. "Who was that?"

"Jacob Black."

"And what did he want?" She waited expectantly for my answer.

"To invite me to a charity ball," I answered honestly. "I told him I needed to check with Edward to make sure I'm not needed for anything first."

"Oh, my God! Bella's going on a date with a movie star!" Rosalie exclaimed. "A hot one at that! I'm so jealous!"

"Hey!" Emmett said indignantly. "I'm still in the room, you know."

I rolled my eyes and went to get into the shower before either of them could say anything else. I quickly washed all the paint splatters off the uncovered parts of my body and out of my hair before throwing on a ratty pair of pajamas and flopping down on the bed with my phone.

"Hello," Edward answered pleasantly.

"Um, I have a question."

"Which is?" he inquired.

"That black and white ball you're going to on New Year's. You're going with Tanya?"

He sighed. "Unfortunately."

"So I would be free to go with Jacob if I wanted?"

"I'm sorry? You want to what?" I could hear the possessiveness bubbling under the surface of his calm voice. It was hot.

"I don't _want_ to anything, baby. Jacob called a few minutes ago and asked me to go with him. As a pretend date or something. He said you'd be there and that everyone would be happy."

We sat in silence while he mulled it over.

"I suppose it would be nice to see you all dressed up, even if I can't touch you," he said slyly.

"How dressed up?"

"Formal, my love. Very formal."

"Will you be in a tux?" I asked, biting my lip at the picture that was popping into my mind.

"Yes."

"And you'll drive the Aston Martin?"

He chuckled. "Would you like me to?"

"Yes." I had the sudden desire to watch one of Emmett's James Bond movies and see what all the fuss was about.

"Then I will. And afterwards, when I take you home and strip off whatever dress you have on that fabulous body of yours, would you like me to continue with this little Bond fantasy you've got going through your head?" he asked roughly.

I hummed and shifted as the desire for him burned through me. "Jesus, would I."

"Then it's settled," he said, snapping out of it. "You'll go with Jacob and I'll go with Tanya and we'll pretend we don't have any feelings toward one another, even though I know I won't be able to keep my eyes off you the entire night. And I may fancy a dance with my assistant once or twice during the span of the evening."

"I don't dance."

"Why not?"

"You've seen me. I can barely walk or stand without falling down. Like tonight. I fell off a ladder and got paint all over me," I explained.

He laughed once. "I'd have paid good money to see that."

"I'm sure you would," I muttered. "So no dancing. Please?"

"No, I'm sorry. You're dancing. Your employer requires you to." I could hear the smile in his voice.

"Edward," I protested.

"Isabella, must you make everything so difficult? I want to dance with you. With my girlfriend, even if it's under the pretense of merely showing my employee a good time. I won't let you fall and I most certainly won't make you look like a fool. Trust me."

"Oh, fine. Maybe I can get Emmett to help me out a few times this week."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome." I paused for a beat. "Why is it that you always win?"

"Because you love me? And would do anything for me?"

"No. I don't think that's it at all." He laughed. "I've got to call Jake back. Apparently, I'm going to need a dress, some shoes, and a hairstylist in a couple weeks."

"We'll go shopping one day this week."

"No, no. If I'm dancing with you, the least you can do is hide your reaction when you see me all dressed up."

"Well, that's not very nice," he pouted.

"You sound like a child."

"I feel like it. Do you know how hard it's going to be to hide the sheer pleasure you bring to me when you do something unexpected? To not have any idea how you're going to look and then for you to walk into the room..."

"You're an actor. Practice."


	12. Chapter 12

**The opinions about the ball were great! You guys have a lot of speculation as to what will happen! I love it!**

**Here's a little indirect angst for ya. Some of you guessed what was going to happen.**

**And a lemon.**

**As always, thanks for the reviews! I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas!**

* * *

Chapter 12

**Edward**

I handed the keys to my Aston Martin to the valet and walked through the swarm of paparazzi waiting for me at The Ivy. I shook hands and gave autographs to the fans waiting at the entrance and had to plaster the fake, pleasant smile on my face as I wormed my way inside.

I told the hostess I was meeting Royce King and was immediately led to the table where Royce was snarling-typically-on his mobile. He was by nature a callous man, but he had the ability to charm people and make the impossible happen for his clients. It was one of the reasons he was so successful. And why I'd never thought about finding a new agent, even if I didn't like the man personally.

Sighing, I sat down and didn't bother to look at the menu, because I'd been here so frequently, I knew the bloody thing by memory, and placed the script in front of Royce. People had their mobiles up, taking pictures of me, and most likely sending them to their friends while I waited for Royce to finally finish his conversation and turn his attention to me.

"Masen!" he shouted, full of false jovialness. "How's it going?"

And just like that, the switch had been flipped. The usual sneer was replaced by a beaming smile, entirely too convincing for my taste.

"Brilliant." I grinned and then glanced around. "Don't you think meeting here is a bit obvious?"

"That's the point, isn't it?" He smiled at me over his gin and tonic. "What did you think?"

I looked at him seriously. "I'm not doing it."

He stiffened. "Why not? It's a fantastic script."

I angled my head. "It is. But I'm not interested. There are scheduling issues and not only that, I'd like to take a break for a while."

I thought perhaps the best way to approach retiring would be to ease everyone into the idea. I'd made up my mind, I wasn't going to act any more. I knew I'd miss the actual process of it, but the long periods of time away from home and the vast amount of press that was involved when putting out a new film were things I wouldn't miss at all.

And I had Bella now to fill the void.

"A break?" he asked incredulously, his mouth sharpening. "For how long?"

I shrugged nonchalantly. "Six months. Possibly a year?"

His blue eyes lit with fury and I braced myself for Royce's usual, tempered response. "Do you know how many directors and producers are lined up to work with you?" he seethed, leaning in towards me. "You take a fucking year off, and there will be no one waiting for you."

I laughed once, bitterly. "That's preposterous, and you know it. I have a movie premiering in May. Even if I took a year off before filming another, it would be out the following year. I don't need to rush things, Royce."

"What the hell has gotten into you? Do you know how hard I've worked to get you where you are?"

"Well, I'd like to think it was my acting ability that got me where I am, but point taken. I realize I'm your big client, and I thank you for all the hard work you've put into starting and maintaining my career, but understand this, Royce. I'm thirty-eight. I'd like a life outside of my job. I want to be able to enjoy my home, my family, and go on holidays. Go to places I've been, but was unable to see because I was constantly filming. Just for a while."

"It's not permanent?" he asked skeptically.

"I can't tell you that." I wouldn't lie to him. "All I know is that I need time off."

He leaned back in his seat and gave me a hard look. "I can't convince you otherwise, can I?"

"You know me, Royce. Once I've made up my mind-"

"There's no changing it," he finished for me. "Well, I suppose I could see if Black wanted the role."

"You do that," I said with a grin. "He'd be a perfect fit."

"Jesus." He rubbed the back of his neck in annoyance and took another swig of his drink. "This doesn't have to do with Tanya Denali, does it?"

I threw him a disgusted look. "Absolutely not. It's purely business between us. You know that."

He nodded. "You never know when the tabloids are onto something."

I barked out a laugh. "Everything they say is bollocks. They have yet to get anything right about me."

"They will one of these days."

"I'm sure they will," I agreed. "It's a little early in the day to be getting pissed, don't you think?"

"No." He waved me off. "I have a date tonight," he said, sending me a wolfish grin and changing the subject. "You know her."

"Oh?" I raised my eyebrow questioningly. "Do tell."

"It's your assistant's friend. The hot blonde."

"Rosalie Hale?" I asked in disbelief. "But she's dating someone." And from what I understood from Bella, was madly in love with Emmett McCarty.

"I guess she's not anymore. I called her and asked her to dinner, to discuss her coming on as a producer when she graduates at King Pictures."

"You lied to her," I said evenly.

He shrugged nonchalantly and smiled. "I merely told her what she wanted to hear. I'm hoping I'll charm her straight into my bed. I bet that woman's a tigress in bed. Have you seen the attitude on her?" He looked out towards the street, his smile taking a sadistic turn, setting my teeth on edge. "God, I can't wait."

"I hear she's wonderful as a producer. You should give her a chance, mate," I mentioned, trying to keep the strange feeling of unease out of my voice.

He eyed me skeptically. "That's quite a lot of personal knowledge about your assistant's friend. Getting into deep conversations while she brings you your dry cleaning?"

_If you only knew_.

"Not particularly. I make it a point to talk to her, though. I don't want her to think I'm an arrogant ass or an awful employer," I said indifferently. I decided to change the subject before he caught on. "Where's the bloody waitress? I'd like to order before I die."

He laughed and flagged her down. "Give her a break and just stare at her tits. They're worth the wait."

"I'll take your word on that," I muttered dryly.

"Lighten up," he retorted.

We ordered, we ate, and then I got out of there as fast as I could so that I could go home and talk to Bella about Rosalie's supposed date with Royce. Something felt wrong there, but I couldn't quite figure out what it was. It tugged at my mind, but was elusive-frustrating.

"Masen!" Royce called out as my Aston Martin pulled up to the curb.

"Yeah?"

"SNL wants you to appear on the show this season. I was thinking we could schedule it the week before _Rogue_ premieres so that you can make a few other appearances while you're in New York."

"Sure. E-mail Bella and she'll put it on the schedule."

I quickly got into my car and drove home, entirely too pleased to see Bella's blue Audi sitting in the driveway when I arrived. I walked in the door and was immediately bumped into by Samson. I stroked his fur and gave him a quick pat before letting him outside to run. I walked through the house, searching for Bella, but didn't see her in any of her usual afternoon spots.

I walked into the bedroom, just as she came out of the bathroom wearing this tiny denim skirt and nothing but a frayed, tan leather vest to hide her breasts. She topped the outfit off with cowboy boots and a Stetson.

The air rushed out of my body, along with any and every thought I had going through my mind as I took her in. Her delicate legs were almost glistening with the lotion she'd rubbed on them, her hair was tangled in a mess of loose waves around her face. Her eyes were bright with excitement, showcasing the warm smile that slowly lit up her features.

"Erm..." My blood stirred beneath the skin in a frenzied heat. "I was going to talk to you about something, but I can't honestly remember what it was now. Where did you get that?" I asked, pointing to her clothes.

"I wore it on Halloween a couple years ago."

I tensed with irrational jealously. "You wore that out?"

"I had a shirt on under the vest. Jealous?" she asked, cocking her brow.

"Not if I get to see more skin than any other bloke," I answered honestly, making her giggle. A sudden thought crossed my mind. Bed. Costume. "Please tell me we're role playing," I asked hopefully.

"No, I just thought I'd see if this stupid thing still fits here instead of at my place." She rolled her eyes. "For being such a smart man, you can be pretty fucking dense."

I smiled widely. "Love, I'm having a hard time thinking right now. All the blood in my head seems to have migrated south."

Her eyes went wicked with delight. "Stop with the British accent, cowboy."

"I seemed to have lost my hat, darlin'," I said in a thick, southern drawl, making her eyes widen.

"Why, you mean this hat?" she asked in a horrible imitation of a southern belle, taking the hat off and batting her eyelashes at me.

"That'd be the one." I narrowed my eyes and took an intentional step towards her. "I don't take lightly to people stealing my things. Even pretty little things like you."

She let out some sort of shocked moan that had my fingers curling up, itching to touch her. "What do you mean to do to me?"

"First, I'm takin' back the hat." I took the hat and put it on my head. It was a bit small, but it worked. "Then..." I trailed off and gave her a calculated look.

"Shit, you look hot," she said breathlessly.

"No breaking character. Even if you have no future in a career as an actress," I warned dangerously.

"I'm not that bad!"

I merely gave her a noncommittal hum in response.

I backed her up against the wall and caged her in with my arms, skimming my nose along her jaw in a slow, deliberate motion as I breathed in her scent. The air hummed around us, growing thicker and heavier with impatience as I waited her out. Her breath was hot and heavy at my ear, sending chills down my spine and causing my pecker to ache furiously with desire. Her shaky hands came up between us, fisting my shirt and latching on to me as she moved her head to look at me, knocking the hat onto the floor as she did.

My control was thin, near breaking point, as those dark, bottomless eyes stared back at me. "Fuck me," she whispered, flicking her tongue out to wet her lips.

I pinned her against the wall as I brought her legs up around me and took her mouth in a deep, destroying kiss. The long, throaty moan that escaped her lips pushed me over the edge; I blanked out as the primal need to stake my claim inside her came over me. Before I knew it, my pants were pooled at my feet and I was poised to drive myself into her.

With a quick, rough thrust, I was inside her, grunting like an animal as the feel of her hot body wrapped around me, owning me. I rammed into her, pushing her firmly against the wall, and causing her to cry out in a mix of pleasure and pain that was almost unbearable. That little leather vest that was blocking access to her bouncing breasts angered me, and I ripped it away from her body, hearing her shocked, excited gasp with the sound of the fabric rending at my hand, spurring me on further.

I kept our connection, but moved her to the bed, throwing her boot covered feet over my shoulders and drove deeply inside her. She arched away from the bed in a wonderfully graceful movement as she neared climax. I leaned down at took her nipple into my mouth, sending her to peak. Her body rocked against mine and trembled violently underneath me as she screamed out my name in ecstasy.

"Do it again," I commanded harshly. I needed to hear my name being driven out of her at my own doing again.

She moaned. "Fuck, you're so domineering today, baby."

She slipped her feet off my shoulders and pushed me to the ground, straddling me and then sinking down on me. Her head dropped back as I filled her again, and we both let out startlingly obscene groans with the sensation.

I palmed her breasts in my hands and watched her move sinuously up and down on me, keeping my eyes locked on our connection the entire time. Her skin grew hot and damp as I let my hands fall to her hips, digging my fingertips into the soft flesh and grinding her against me as she came down, making sure her clit dragged across my skin each and every time.

I gritted my teeth against the need to come as her muscles tightened down on me and her strangled cries filled the room. She came with my name on her lips again, rippling around me and pushing me over the edge.

She smothered the growl that I released between my teeth as I came hard, blindingly, inside her with a passionate kiss that had the muscles in my body tensing up. I twitched inside her as I pulled out and rolled us so that I could take her into my arms as we collapsed into a heap of limp bodies that only outrageously satisfying sex can create.

"What did you want to talk to me about?" she gasped after a while.

My mind had gone completely void of anything except instinctual things like keeping my heart pumping and bringing burning breaths into my now exhausted body.

I shook myself of the daze so that I could answer her. "Royce is taking Rosalie out tonight."

"What?" She propped herself up on her elbow and looked down at me.

"She thinks it's a business meeting, he more or less is considering it a date," I answered. "I have a strange feeling it won't go as planned. For either of them."

"Shit, I have to get home and try to convince her to not go." She quickly stood up and went into the bathroom to retrieve her clothes.

"I suppose you do, but I don't think it will do any good. Rosalie's even more stubborn than you are, isn't she?"

"Yeah," she called from the bathroom. She came out as I was gathering up my clothes and gave me a quick kiss. "I love you. I'll call you later."

"Fetch the dog on your way by, will you?" I asked, stifling a laugh at her faltering steps.

"Fuck you, do it yourself." She looked over her shoulder and grinned at me.

"Come on, love. You're going right by the door." I gave her an innocent look. "I'm going to take a quick shower."

She pursed her lips unhappily and then finally relented. "Fine."

"I love you!" I called out after her, chuckling to myself.

She needed to get used to him if she planned to spend the rest of her life with me. I went into the closet and unlocked the safe, pulling out the small, black velvet box that held my mother's wedding ring inside it. Now that Bella had admitted her fear of marriage and children was precisely what I'd thought all along-unfounded and irrational-the picture of me proposing had worked its way into every thought.

I just needed to wait a while so that I didn't scare Bella in my rush to make her my wife, as impossible as that notion seemed now.

* * *

**Bella**

I drove home, trying to cope with the inexplicable feeling of dread that came over me when Edward told me about Rosalie and Royce's dinner and raced into the apartment. Emmett was sitting on the couch with some sort of chemistry book in his lap, studying intensely for his final.

I knocked the book to the ground and pushed him back against the couch, staring hard down at him. "You are a fucking moron."

"What did I do?" he asked in surprise.

"You're letting Rosalie go out with Royce King. On a date!" I hissed.

"Business dinner," he corrected. "Besides, no one _lets_ Rosalie do anything. She does what she wants, when she wants. You know that. I just saved myself the trouble of starting a fight." He shrugged. "What's the big deal?"

"The douche thinks it's a date! Like working his way into Rosie's pants date!" I heard the opening of the bathroom door and abruptly stood up. "I'm not finished with you. Do not leave," I warned.

I hurried over to the hall and followed Rosalie to her room. "Don't go," I pleaded.

"Don't be so fucking dramatic. I can handle myself," she said flippantly.

"Edward said Royce wants to take you home. You don't have the same motives here , Rose," I argued.

She turned and dropped her towel, causing me to look up at the ceiling to avoid her nakedness while the blush crept into my cheeks. "Bella, if I didn't talk to any of the men who wanted to take me home, I'd have almost no social life."

"But-"

She eyed me skeptically. "Why are you talking to Edward Masen about me anyways?" I bit down on my lip so that I didn't answer her. "You like him."

"Of course I like him. What's not to like?"

"No," she argued. "You _like him_ like him."

"Don't change the subject!" I snapped. "This is a mistake."

She laughed and then shoved me out of the room, slamming the door in my face and locking it. "Go away, Bella. I'll see you later."

_Fuck._

I went back out into the living room and sat down next to Emmett, who had his book back in his lap. I grabbed my backpack and began filling out the graduate school application I was still debating on turning in because it was mindless work. I couldn't focus on the prose I needed to revise for my poetry class tomorrow with all the senseless rambling going on in my head.

"Dude, what the hell is with you?" Emmett asked, cocking his head to the side. "You're wigging out."

I realized I was tapping my pen rapidly-in loud staccato beats-against the paper. I bit my lip and looked at him. "I have a really bad feeling about this." That irrational feeling of dread coursed through me again, like arsenic, poisoning my veins.

"You're being paranoid."

"Am I?"

He sighed and grabbed my hands. "This is Rosalie Hale. Fiercely independent, loyal, takes no shit from anyone-including myself-Rosalie Hale."

"Is that why you're not in there trying to convince her not to go?" I asked curiously.

"No, I'm not in there because I trust her. Because I know she would never do anything to hurt me. Because this joker doesn't stand a chance against my girl. Because she'll knee him in the nuts and tell him to take his big film company and shove it up his ass if he tries to hit on her. And you know how things work in this town, you have to take risks and play the game to get ahead."

I smiled with the picture of Rosalie kneeing Royce in the groin. "Yeah. Okay."

"What do you think?" Rosalie came out into the living room, spinning around in a tight white blouse and black pants. Her hair was even pulled back away from her face in a low ponytail.

"I think you look hot, babe." Emmett flashed her his dimples and I watched the ice she typically surrounded herself with melt with his words. "Very hot for teacher."

"Is it too much?" she asked me.

"Nope. Looks great." I gave her a tight lipped smile. "Go get 'em."

She gave us grateful smiles, kissed Emmett quickly-yet still managed to set the room on fire-and then darted out the door. I put my focus back on my application while Emmett studied for his final.

"Well, if you're done freaking out, I'm going home. I've got to get some sleep otherwise I'll fail this fucker." He shut his book and put it in his bag. "Get some sleep, would you? You're hardly ever home anymore. You need to take tonight and make those bags under your eyes disappear."

"I have bags?" My hand shot up to stroke under my eye.

"Purple shadows. Someone's been screwing around instead of sleeping." Color flooded my cheeks. "Be safe, Bella Bond."

"You sound like an over-protective brother," I laughed.

"I am. You're like a sister to me." He gave me a noisy kiss on the top of my head. "Tell Rosie I love her and to call me in the morning to tell me how it went."

"You bet."

I got up and made a bag of popcorn, then sat and stared at the TV-without turning it on-as I ate it. I got up and took a bath, read a book, and finally forced myself to finish proofreading the poem for tomorrow's poetry final, all while anxiously waiting for Rosalie to come home.

Ten o'clock struck, and I heard the impatient, angry clicks of heels approaching the apartment in the hallway. Rosalie fumbled with the keys, jingling them in the lock for a moment, before she flung the door open and locked it behind her.

She blew the hair that had fallen out of her ponytail away from her eyes and gave me an icy look. "I don't want to hear it. Don't even think it."

"What?" I asked, puzzled.

"I told you so."

"What happened?" I asked, following her with my eyes as she crossed the room.

"The fucker lied to me," she said hotly, throwing the refrigerator door open and grabbing the bottle of wine that was in the door. "I need something stronger than this," she sneered, putting it back.

"There's some Jameson Emmett left here in the cabinet above the refrigerator," I told her.

"Perfect." She got the bottle and a glass out of the cabinet and stalked over to me. "He fed me a bunch of bullshit about being talented and becoming an asset to the company, all so that he could get into my pants."

"Imagine that," I said dryly. She gave me a threatening look. "What? Guys are like that!" I protested.

"I made it perfectly clear there would be no getting into the pants. But did he listen? No. And now I went out and bought these shoes, got dressed up, and wasted a perfectly good night that I could have spent studying for nothing. Prick." She slammed back the whiskey and grimaced. "God, I hate this shit."

I looked down at the lacy black pumps. "They are hot shoes, though."

She lifted her foot and admired them. "Aren't they? Anyway, he got drunk and I had to shove him off me and then kick him in the balls to get him to back off. Needless to say, my career with King Pictures is over before it began."

I giggled. "Emmett said you would do that." I paused. "I'm sorry."

She waved me off and put back another drink. "It's fine. I should have known that smarmy agent wouldn't help me."

"Smarmy. Excellent word. He is a bit of a weasel," I said with a laugh.

She nodded her head. "Guess he has to be in his line of work to get the unknown clients jobs. But damn. I'm not gullible. I'm not naive. And he played me like a fucking violin." She glanced over at me. "You tried to warn me. I didn't listen. Why didn't I listen?"

"Because under all that blond hair, you're incredibly thick-headed?" I replied.

"Ha." She turned and looked at me seriously. "How did you know?"

"I just had a feeling it wasn't going to turn out well." I shrugged. "I've heard Edward speak to him-about him-and met him a couple times. I just get a really bad vibe from the douchebag."

A loud knock on the door interrupted our conversation. Confused, Rosalie got up and looked through the peephole, only to quickly spin around and put her back against the door.

"Come on, Rosalie. I saw you look through the peephole," Royce slurred on the other side. "Let me in, baby."

"Did you follow me here?" she asked in disbelief.

"I thought if I came to grovel, you'd change your mind." He snickered loudly. "I even brought you flowers. See?"

She grumbled something unpleasant under her breath before speaking out. "Go away, Royce. I already told you there was no fucking way you were taking me to bed."

"Fuck you."

"We'll be slurping on snow cones in hell before that happens, you dick," she snarled. "Go away or I'm calling the police."

"Go ahead, bitch!" He kicked or punched the door, making Rosalie jump.

She didn't budge. "Call them, Bella."

I grasped the phone and dialed nine-one-one, explaining the situation as Royce's kicks and bangs against the door grew more and more relentless, more urgent and angry. I called out that the police were on their way, and then called Edward.

"Come get your boy," I gasped as something shattered outside the door.

"Who?"

"Royce!" I shrieked. "He's here and he's drunk. I've already called the police but he's still trying to get in the apartment!" I closed my eyes as he started shouting a string of profanities to Rosalie.

The loud roar of his Aston Martin sounded in my ear. "Lock yourselves in your room. I'm on my way."

I heard the click as he hung up and threw myself across the room. "Let's go."

I ran with Rosalie across the room, just as the hinges on the front door burst loose from the frame. We both screamed out as he drunkenly lunged towards us, crashing into the end table and knocking the lamp onto the floor. I slammed the door shut in his face and locked it. He started raving on the other side, screaming about how he'd get to Rosalie and then she'd pay for making him look like a fool, but I was too busy taking Rosalie and holding her shaking body against me to listen.

Rosalie grabbed the phone for our land line off the nightstand and called Emmett, sobbing almost uncontrollably and apologizing for agreeing to go out with him. I sat and listened to Royce's rampage on our apartment-the smashing of dishes, the crashing of furniture. I heard rips and tears, scratches and screeches, and knew our apartment was destroyed by this one man's inebriated state.

"Where are the fucking police?" I shouted when I heard something smash through the TV.

Abruptly, things went silent. I strained to listen to something, anything, when I was assaulted with Edward's furious voice as he argued with Royce. I heard another loud crashing noise, followed by Edward's muffled oath and launched myself off the bed and through the door.

"Edward!" I screamed, watching him roll on the floor with his crazed agent.

Royce swung at Edward and narrowly missed, hitting the hardwood floor with a sickening crunch of his hand and roaring with angry pain. He shot up off Edward and stalked past me, like he didn't even see me, to the open bedroom door and grabbed Rosalie, shouting obscenely at her and throwing her against the wall, pulling his hand back and getting ready to hit her.

I started towards them, intent to do something to get him away from Rosalie-I had no idea what-but Edward sprinted past me and caught the back of Royce's hand with his mouth, grunting as the force broke the skin on his lip, and then threw a quick, neat punch directly to Royce's snarled face, causing his already wavering consciousness to finally falter, and let him fall to the floor with an exaggerated thud. I could finally hear the screaming of the police sirens as they closed in.

He wiped his lip with the back of his hand and looked at me. "Are you all right?" I nodded and let out a whimper. "You?" he asked Rosalie.

"Yeah. Thanks." She cleared her throat and stood up. "I'm going outside to meet the police."

She took a step over Royce and shuddered as she went out of the room. As soon as she was gone, Edward wrapped his arms around my trembling body and started murmuring soothing words in my ear.

"I think it's safe to say he's fired," I said at an attempt to lighten things up.

"I think it's safe to assume that, yes," Edward replied tightly. "Love, you are a magnet for danger, do you know that? I'm going to suffer a heart attack before I'm forty because of you."

"It wasn't my fault," I pouted.

"No, but you were here. I've known Royce for ten years. He may be a drunk, but never has he behaved this way. He usually keeps that temper reigned in." He sighed heavily. "Are you sure you're all right?"

"I'm fine." I looked up at him and lightly skimmed my fingers over his busted lip. "You're hurt."

"I'm all right." He leaned in and kissed me tenderly. "You're coming home with me."

"But-"

"No buts," he said sharply. "Your door is dangling from the one screw that held when Royce burst in. I'm not risking some other madman coming in here and harming you."

I nodded and wrapped my arms around his neck, hugging him close to me. "Thank you for being here."

He nuzzled into my neck. "If he'd have hurt you, I wouldn't have stopped. I would have wanted to rip his throat out for trying to touch you." He let out a muffled moan against my skin and pulled me against him tighter.

The police moved around us, hoisting Royce up to his feet, cuffing him, and taking him to one of the patrol cars while we stood and held on to each other. Emmett's loud voice coming down the hall caused us to snap out of it and step away from each other hastily with guilty expressions on our faces.

"Thank you for getting here before the police did and keeping that asshole off of Rosie," Emmett said, eyeing us both suspiciously.

Edward nodded and then looked down at me, warring with something. "Oh, sod it. You've already figured it out." He kissed me passionately, gripping my shoulders and pulling me up off my feet. "I love her," he stated cautiously to Emmett as he stepped back. "I'm not taking advantage of her, if that's what you're thinking."

"You can't tell anyone," I said softly.

Emmett gave me a scornful look. "You want to sneak around with him?" he asked me harshly. "Hide because he says so?"

I shook my head and took a step towards Emmett. "I asked _him_ to hide, Em. I don't want to be hounded by photographers just because I'm involved with him. Please don't say anything. Not even to Rosalie."

He opened his mouth and then quickly shut it. "Fine. But you need to tell her. She'll be heartbroken if she thinks you lied to her."

"I know," I said quietly.

"I guess you've got someplace to stay tonight?" he asked, staring at Edward.

"She's coming home with me," Edward replied. "You should go down and give your statement. See if Rosalie is all right."

"Okay," I said softly.

I started down the hallway and stopped when I heard Emmett's gruff voice. "Be good to her," he warned.

"I will." I could hear Edward's smile in his voice.

"Thanks again, Masen." Emmett started out of the room so I quickly raced down the hall to the mangled living room. Everything was upended or pitched across the room. It was hardly recognizable.

I didn't even bother to look around; it could wait until tomorrow.

I heard Emmett's bass chuckle behind me just before he flung me over his shoulder and carried me through the mess. "I wasn't going to kick his ass, Bella."

"I know," I said, flushing at being caught.

"He's a good guy."

"He is," I agreed.

He put me down and put his huge hand on my shoulder. "You love him?"

"Yes."

He nodded once. "Well, let's go see how our girl is doing."


	13. Chapter 13

**Holy hell it's a TMWCBM update!**

**Sorry 'bout that, this chapter has been done since before Christmas (runs and hides) but I've been so busy with the holidays and trying to get the latest chapter of BTSATM hammered out, I haven't had time to update.**

**But I'm doing both today.**

**Thanks for the reviews and adds. This story is surpassing any expectation I might have had for it when I started it. And seriously, it's my fave ;)**

* * *

Chapter 13

**Edward**

I watched them carry Royce out of Bella's bedroom with anger still burning under my skin and a throbbing, fattening lower lip. I wrapped my arms around Bella, feeling thankful she and Rosalie weren't harmed and yet guilty for being relieved that Bella hadn't been the intended target-that it was Rosalie instead. Guilty for introducing them to him, for not seeing how volatile he truly was-for not acting on the ghosting of unease that unnerved me at lunch this afternoon.

I knew that a quick fist in the face wouldn't be enough if he had aimed towards Bella. I would have ripped him apart and danced around his dismembered corpse with glee. A thought that was in all honesty terrifying, seeing as I wasn't a violent person by nature. But the fierce feeling of protectiveness I had for Bella was insurmountable; it was new and strange, something I'd never felt for anyone else and yet somehow felt like glory, entwining us even more.

I stayed back after Bella and Emmett went outside, surveying the damage. Bella's flat was torn apart by Royce's maddened hands. The couch was flipped over, tables were smashed, lamps broken, pictures demolished. Kitchen cupboards were open, their contents tossed aside carelessly, and dishes lay broken on the white linoleum floor. Even the now cracked telly had been a victim to his blind, incomprehensible rage.

My mobile started ringing incessantly in my pocket. I had a feeling it was Alice.

"Yes, darlin'?" I asked, waiting for her tinkling voice to answer me.

"Is she all right?" Alice asked fearfully.

"She's fine. How did you not see this? You seem to be watching us closely." I replied with a small laugh.

"I don't know," she answered regretfully. "I was busy and I missed it. I'm sorry, Edward."

"Don't be. You live in Texas for pity's sake. How's the car?"

"Oh, it's wonderful! Jasper is scared to death of riding with me, though."

I heard Jasper's deep voice drawl in the background. _"You drive like you're out to kill me, sugar. I'm going to murder your brother when we get out to LA."_

"Don't listen to him." I heard her smack, followed by his calm laugh, echo through the line. "He's being absurd. We'll see you in a few days. Love you!"

I put the mobile back in my pocket and threw the hood of my sweatshirt up so that my conspicuous hair was hidden and I would blend a bit more before someone looked up from their work and noticed me. I went back into Bella's bedroom, gathering things I knew she'd want for her stay with me and then picked her messenger bag off the floor in the living room. A thick notebook lay on the floor underneath the broken coffee table, so I picked it up to see if it was Bella's, sending a flurry of papers out of the notebook and onto the floor-Bella's graduate school application papers, partially filled out.

I was helpless to stop the smile that lit up my face as I thought about Bella getting her doctorate and the swell of pride that accompanied it.

I held the papers up to Emmett as he stepped into the room. "Did you know about this?"

He looked at the papers then looked around with a scowl. "Yeah. She's still not sure about it. It's a lot of money and she needs to apply for student loans to do it. And something else was holding her back. I guess that something was you."

"Me?" I asked in surprise.

"You're how old?" He picked up a picture and then threw it back down in disgust. When I didn't answer, he laughed-a deep, booming laugh that nearly caused the entire room to vibrate. "Right. Well, she didn't say anything, but my guess is that with you in the picture, it changes her future a little."

I knew exactly what he meant. "She can do both. Get married, pursue this."

He nodded and flipped the couch so that he could sit on it. "But this is Bella. She does nothing halfway."

I sat next to him. "You know her well."

"For three years now." He kicked the coffee table out a few feet with anger. "I can't believe I let Rosalie go to dinner with this guy. I'm such a fucking idiot. She could have-" He broke off and shook his head.

"Don't blame yourself. From what I understand, Rosalie does what she wants."

He chuckled. "That she does."

"I'm going to call a cleaning company to dispose of the destroyed items and put things aside so that Bella and Rosalie can go through them. It's the least I can do. After all, it's my fault Rosalie met Royce."

"You feel guilty?" he asked, staring at me in disbelief.

I nodded. "I introduced them. I sat there this afternoon with the knowledge that Royce was trying to lure Rosalie to bed with the pretense of hiring her as a producer at King pictures." I sighed. "It felt wrong and yet I did nothing."

The weight fell over me again, thick and tangible, teasing the tip of my tongue with its bitter taste. I didn't bother shrugging it off, instead I welcomed it as a part of my penance.

I stood up and put the bag over my shoulder. "I should go before someone recognizes me."

I stepped over the wreckage and went outside to find Bella huddled up next to an extremely irritated Rosalie.

"Are you finished?" I asked Bella quietly.

She nodded. "I gave my statement."

I glanced over and groaned with the unwelcome sight of James Eliot walking round my car and then leaning casually against the hood, waiting for me. "I've got to do damage control. And then I need to give my statement. I'll be back as soon as I can."

"Okay," she said softly.

I wanted to reach out and touch her, comfort her in some way, but couldn't. With a sharp exhale of frustration, I turned and walked over to where the reporter was waiting for me.

"Eliot," I said coolly as I approached him. "How did you know about this?"

"Got an in at the department." He pushed his dark blonde hair back into his ponytail and gave me a sardonic grin. "Long time no see. Think that hood over your hair would keep me from recognizing you?"

"No. But it keeps the gawking neighbors from noticing me. What do you want?"

"Isn't it obvious? A story." He pulled out a recorder and pushed a button. "What happened here?"

"Royce King happened," I said blandly.

His deep brown eyes flashed once. "Royce King? Your _agent_ Royce King?"

"The very same," I said wryly. "I got a unsettling call from my assistant telling me that Royce was trying to break in."

"Why?"

"Not sure, really. You'll need to talk to him about that." I shifted on my feet impatiently.

"Give it to me straight," he said balefully, "and I'll make sure I keep your name clean in this. Wouldn't want to upset your pretty little girlfriend by making it seem you've been cheating on her."

Hot rage flashed through my body with his threat, even if it was idle. "I don't know much," I said keeping my voice even. "All I know is that my assistant's roommate-"

"Name," he demanded.

"Rosalie Hale," I sighed. "She went to dinner with Royce under the impression he was talking to her about a career at King Pictures, only he had no intention of ever hiring her. He got drunk-as usual-and tried to seduce her. He was refused and got angry. He must've followed her here and then broke down the door trying to get to her. He destroyed their flat."

"What role do you play in this?" he asked suspiciously.

"My assistant, Miss Swan, called the police and then called me. I managed to get here before the police and subdue him."

"How?"

"I hit him," I answered honestly. "And I'd do it again for trying to attack Miss Hale." I paused. "Anything else?"

"How did you beat the cops here?"

I laughed bleakly. "I think that's a question for the department, don't you? Why they didn't respond to a domestic disturbance immediately?"

His eyes narrowed as he studied me. "Okay, Masen. Why you? Why did your assistant call you?"

"Because he's my agent," I said flatly. "And she was frightened. No one else she knows is an acquaintance of his. Seems pretty obvious there, mate."

His lips twitched. "Last question. Why did you rush all the way over here for your assistant?"

I raised my brow. "Because I'm not a heartless bastard?" His lips finally curved into a smile, so I gave him a better answer. "Because I like both Miss Swan and Miss Hale personally and I wanted to make sure they were both all right. If you need anything else, contact my publicist."

"Your assistant," he called out as I started to walk away. "Is she the little brunette with the sweet body?"

There it was again. That strange need to protect Bella. I took a deep breath to stay calm and keep it buried down and off my face. "What's it to you?"

"She's hot." He flashed me a toothy smile. "She single?"

I almost growled the answer back. "No."

I left the conversation there and went over to the detectives to give my statement. After answering all their questions as detailed as I could, I walked back over to Bella to find Rosalie ranting at her and Emmett.

"I want to fucking bury him," she fumed. "I want to destroy his reputation and his career. I want to make him pay. Jail time is not even close to being enough."

"Start with his parents," I suggested. "They'll do almost anything to keep his name clean."

She stared at me for a moment and then nodded. "I'll do just that. I might even sue the fuckers. You know, your agent is a psycho."

"Former agent," I corrected. "I'm going to let Bella stay with me and send a crew out to help you clean up." I saw Bella open her mouth to protest and put my hand up to stop her. "Don't argue with me. The holidays are coming up and I'm sure Rosalie would like everything taken care of before she visits her family. This speeds up the process. It also gets you back into your apartment sooner."

And I also decided to completely refurnish her apartment for Christmas, but she needn't know that yet. I couldn't let something that I held myself accountable for go by without doing something to atone to it-not only to Bella, but to Rosalie as well.

Rosalie snorted. "You've got her figured out, Masen."

I shrugged and smiled. "You work with someone long enough, you find a few things out about them." Bella bit down on her lip so that she didn't laugh at the lie.

Emmett merely rolled his eyes.

"Thanks. I appreciate it. Emmett and I are leaving Sunday to visit my parents before we fly to Portland to visit with his family. Now I don't have to worry about leaving a mess on Bella," she said stiffly.

I gave Emmett a quick goodbye and waited for Bella to finish hugging her friends before leading her to the car, being careful not to touch her since James was still standing off to the side watching us closely-more specifically, Bella. With an appreciation I didn't particularly care for.

"Get in the car," I murmured quietly. "We're being watched." She started to look around. "Don't look," I scolded, sliding into the driver's seat.

"Sorry," she mumbled. "Who's watching us?"

"James Eliot. A reporter. Well, that's what he calls himself, but really he's a parasite. He pays people off to get stories and sells them to the tabloids. Doesn't matter which one. He's an independent journalist." I said the last line with venom. "He's got some sort of 'in' with the LAPD and knew that Royce had been arrested here."

"So he came out on a hunch?" she questioned.

I shook my head. "More like someone told him who was renting the apartment and he connected you to me."

"Oh."

"You'll be in the news now, love. I'm sorry." I reached over and squeezed her hand apologetically.

She shrugged. "It's okay. Sounds like Rosalie's going to make a big spectacle of this, so I'm sure it'll be in all over the place in a few days anyway. It's probably not going to be a big deal. They won't be interested in me." She looked over at me. "Right?"

I smiled at her. "Right," I agreed. "Rosalie was the intended victim. She'll be the one getting the calls and requests for interviews."

Bella was silent for the rest of the drive to my house as she stared out the window and watched the city pass us by in a blur. She quickly got out of the car when I parked in the garage and went straight to my bedroom, getting undressed and brushing her teeth before crawling into the bed and sighing heavily as her head hit the pillow.

I climbed in next to her and put my arms around her gorgeous, naked form. "Are you sure you're all right? You seem upset."

"I'm fine. Just worried about Rosalie. Sometimes she uses anger as a defense mechanism." She stopped for a moment. "It was like I wasn't even there. He never even looked at me."

"I wish I knew why he did it," I admitted. "And I wish I'd never introduced them to each other."

"Who are you going to hire to replace him?"

"No one," I replied. "I'm retiring, remember? I can handle things until I've finished promoting _Rogue_."

"You really are retiring?" She looked almost hopeful.

"I am." I kissed her softly, wincing at the sharp streak of pain the cut on my lip caused. "Are you going to apply to graduate school?" She didn't answer. "I saw the papers, Bella. And I think it's an excellent idea."

"But it's so much work. You deserve someone who doesn't have her nose buried in books all the time."

I cupped her face with my hand. "I want you, however I can get you. Don't overanalyze it." She looked like she was about to protest. "Money's no issue. Neither is our relationship. You can be with me and chase this dream at the same time. And I will be so proud of you when you become Dr. Isabella Swan."

"I'd hope by then it'd be Masen," she said coyly, sending a thrill through me. "And you're not paying for my tuition."

"If we're married, what's mine is yours and vice versa." I threw her a dazzling smile.

Her eyes widened and her breath hitched before she quickly recovered. "You're too much," she grumbled. "Always trying to give me things."

"I've been extremely fortunate in life. And frankly, I enjoy spoiling you. You wouldn't want to spoil my fun, would you?" I gave her a pouty look.

She rolled her eyes. "Can I at least pay for it until we _do_ get married? Because I know I'll wind up agreeing to this anyway."

"I think that's an excellent compromise." I pulled the covers back and grazed the tattoo on her hip. "I've been meaning to ask, does this carry some sort of significance for you?"

"Other than being a permanent stamp of my brief stint with rebellion?" I stared at her blankly. "I got it on a whim on my eighteenth birthday. Charlie is dead-set against tattoos."

I looked down at the black ink. "It's quite beautiful, really," I murmured. "The shading of the flowers, the detail of the bark on the branch. Does Charlie know you have this?"

A self-satisfied smirk crossed her lips. "No."

I shifted and pulled her hip against my lips, brushing it tenderly while the atmosphere shifted around us. "Do you feel that?" I breathed. "The way the air shifts around us. It pulsates and grows thicker the more I want you. It's heady. But surely not natural."

"Unnatural? Try exceptional." She pulled my face to hers. "I hope we're the exception to the rule. The rule I was terrified of. That because the connection we share is so intense, so necessary for me to function properly anymore, that the lust we have for each other won't fizzle and fade with time. That we won't grow tired of each other and throw our relationship aside. That we'll last until the last breath we take."

My responding kiss was heavy with emotion. "We will, my love." I rested my forehead against hers. "You're changing. You're not as snarky as you were when I first met you."

She laughed. "I'm still snarky. I'm just finding balance. Because of you." She kissed me chastely on the lips. "Are you going to fuck me sometime this century? Because I don't have time to wait on my feeble, old-man of a boyfriend. I _do_ have a final in the morning."

I grinned crookedly and pulled her body flush against mine. "There's my girl."

* * *

**Bella**

Edward had a cleaning crew out to clean up the disaster that was my apartment the next morning. I thought I should be upset that some crazed drunkard had ruined a lot of my belongings, but I wasn't. It was just shit. Useless shit that didn't really matter-things that could be replaced. And because I'd realized this, I also knew how utterly devastated I would have been if Edward wouldn't have shown up when he did. And if something would have happened to Rosalie at Royce's hands.

Because _she_ was irreplaceable.

Which made me feel so fucking guilty for keeping something so huge-my relationship with Edward-from her. Every time I spoke to Rose, I nearly blurted out that I was in love with Edward. Something I knew would end in some sort of fight, but I was ready to try anything to relieve myself of the impenetrable cloud that hovered over me.

Talking to Edward about it helped. He soothed and cajoled me into realizing that if I wanted to keep it a secret, we had to be meticulous with who we allowed to know about us and who we didn't; if I felt like Rosalie should know, he'd stand behind my decision to tell her. And that if I wanted to make some sort of public announcement about our relationship and tell everyone else I felt guilty over keeping in the dark, he would be more than willing to do so.

But that wasn't what I wanted at all.

It was a double-edged sword, my relationship with Edward. Keeping it a secret meant I would carry the guilt until he was officially retired and then we would be free to truly be together wherever we were. And telling the world now meant we would become what he had warned me of-trapped.

Although, I was quickly finding out that being trapped inside Edward's house was not necessarily a bad thing. In fact, it was fantastic.

I stayed in with Edward, only leaving for finals and to help Rosalie go through our stuff at the apartment. In some sort of unspoken agreement, I had the week off. I still answered the Blackberry and kept up with his schedule, but Edward did everything else himself. When we weren't keeping up with real life, we were playing out numerous scenarios that he came up with to spice up our already flavorful sex life. One day I was his French maid, telling him all sorts of naughty things in French just before he hitched up my uniform and fucked me on the steps. Another time we played out the forbidden personal assistant role in his office, where he proceeded to scrape his arm over the desk and knock everything onto the floor before he took me there-which was hotter than anything I could have imagined.

Being with an actor definitely had its perks. His imagination was endless.

But there was something wrong with him. I knew it wasn't that I was spending my nights there because of the looks I would catch him giving me when I did something as simple as throw on a t-shirt and pad into the kitchen to start coffee, but he wasn't content. I'd find him staring into nothingness with a worried expression on his face and staring out the window, lost in thought-looking like someone had snuffed the light out inside him. Something was bothering him, but I knew that when he was ready to talk to me about it, he would. He hid nothing from me.

It had been five days of living with Edward, but I could already see myself actually _living_ here. I was so happy being with him-regardless of the strange distance he was putting between us-the thought of going back to the way we were before put a scowl on my face. Now that the irrational fear that bubbled up when I thought about being married to Edward and giving him kids was gone, it was all I could think about. Like my biological clock was ticking inside me-getting louder and louder each day-begging me to get pregnant.

Which was really fucked up since I was only twenty-one.

Edward saw the scowl on my face and reach over the console to graze his fingers over my cheek. "What's wrong?"

I impulsively answered him. "What would you do if I got pregnant?" My face flamed up as soon as the words were out of my mouth.

He stopped at a light and looked at me in shock. "Are you?"

"No," I answered, a little louder than I'd intended.

He looked almost...disappointed? "I'd be happy. Wouldn't you?"

"Yes. No. I don't know," I muttered, mortified that I'd started this awkward conversation.

"Are you still feeling guilty about Rosalie not knowing? Is that what this is about? Are you wondering what would happen if this secret you have was forced to come out? Because if it's going to cause you this much anxiety, you should just tell her." He turned his attention back to the road and started through the intersection.

"Maybe," I admitted. That was probably it.

"I'd love to have a daughter," he said softly. "Spoil her rotten and all that. I actually thought it would have happened long ago."

"You want a daughter?" I asked, feeling ridiculously blissful with the picture it was creating in my mind.

_Hit the fucking brakes, Bella._

He nodded and turned to go to my apartment. "I've always wanted a family. Until now, I felt like becoming an actor cheated me out of that, but now I know that I had to wait for you to come into my life. That it wouldn't have been right with anyone else."

I was becoming a big pile of goo in my plushy leather seat with his words. So, I changed the subject. "Angela says she can come over tomorrow."

"Ben's under the impression it will be just a few blokes hanging out at my house, which saves me from any of the Jessica issues. I sort of feel like an arse doing this."

"Really? Guilty conscience over the annoying neighbor?" I asked with a grin.

"Believe it or not, yes."

I shifted so that I was angled towards him. "I have a really good feeling about it. Like they'll hit it off and we'll be stuck on our own." I waggled my eyebrows, making him laugh. "Not necessarily a bad thing."

"I suppose not." He parked the car and looked at me steadily. "Rosalie will be here, correct?"

"Yes. Not for a while, though."

He silently got out of the car and came around to my side to open the door for me. "I have a surprise," he said nervously. "And I wanted you to see it alone first."

I groaned and shuffled towards the building. "You just bought me a car! What else could I need?"

I hadn't meant it rhetorically, but he didn't answer me as we made our way down the hall and to the new door that had been installed by maintenance. I turned the key in the lock and pushed the door open, dumbfounded by what awaited me.

Everything that Royce had destroyed had been replaced-upgraded. We had new brown leather seating and tables facing a new flatscreen TV hung on the wall in the living room, a new dining room table and chairs set, and new frames for all the various pictures we had throughout the apartment. The scuffs and holes in the walls had been repaired and the nasty olive-colored paint looked brand new. I darted into the kitchen and found new plates and appliances in the cabinets and on the counters.

I whirled around and glared at Edward. "This was completely unnecessary."

He raked a hand through his hair and rocked on his heels. "Merry Christmas?"

I blinked once and then stalked over to him. "Merry Christmas?" I ground out, staring angrily up at him. "You fucking promised! No gifts!"

"It's just as much for Rosalie as it is for you," he said calmly, infuriating me further.

"She's going to figure it out!" I yelled. "This," I motioned to the room wildly, "is not keeping things a secret. You aren't saying the words 'I love you' in front of everyone, but don't you think that doing something this generous is going to make everyone a little suspicious of your motives?"

"No." He raised his voice and his brows buckled with frustration. "Because _I_ introduced that monster to you and Rosalie. Because this wouldn't have happened if you hadn't met me. So, forgive me for trying to make amends to you and your roommate."

I was speechless for a moment. And then I threw my arms around him and kissed him hard. "This is not your fault."

He gazed down at me brokenly and pulled me tighter against him. "In an indirect way it is."

"Is this what's been bothering you all week?" He stared at me blankly. "You've been sort of distant," I admitted.

He looked ashamed. "I'm so sorry. You don't think I was pushing you away, do you? I loved having you at my house," he said passionately.

"No, I don't think you were pushing me away. And I loved being at your house," I said with a blush. "But you weren't yourself. I knew there was something wrong." I stroked his face with the back of my hand. "Jesus, Edward. You're being so stupid about this. No one expected Royce to do this. He snapped."

He blew out a breath and nodded. "If you loved being at my house, why don't you stay with me during your holiday?" he asked with a crooked smirk.

"You want me to stay with you for another two weeks?" I whispered against his lips.

"Very much," he murmured. "Is that a yes?"

"Yes."

I wound my hands through the hair at the back of his neck as he closed the tiny space left between us. His tongue snaked out and teased my lips, pulling back as I opened my mouth and causing me to groan in frustration. I pressed myself into him and was rewarded by him taking me into a bone-melting kiss. He held me up with one arm since my knees had gone weak, while his other hand skimmed across the skin of my abdomen, slowly working its way up...

A throat clearing caught our attention and broke us apart. I glanced over and flushed from head to toe as I saw Rosalie standing in the doorway with her arms crossed over her chest and glaring at me furiously.

"I thought your class didn't get over until six," I said sheepishly.

"I got done early," she said bitingly. "What the fuck is going on?" My back immediately went up.

Edward put a protective arm around my waist and pulled me against him, making Rosalie's face scrunch up with disgust. "What did it look like?" I retorted.

"It looked like this womanizer was doing exactly what I warned you about." She took a step towards us and set her sights on Edward. "Do you _need_ to fuck everyone? Is it some sort of compulsion you have to get your hands on every woman you see?" she hissed at him. "Bella should sue you for sexual harassment."

"Rose!" I yelled. "It's not like that, damn it. I told you he wasn't like that!"

"Bullshit! He's feeding you bullshit!" she argued back.

"NO! Rosalie, I love him!"

That shut her up. For a minute anyway. "You love him." She laughed bitterly. "Oh, that's rich. You think he loves you back?"

"I do," Edward interjected. "More than you could possibly imagine." His eyes were bright with fire. "I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I have never felt so strongly about anyone before in my life. And I'm fortunate that she feels the same."

"How long?" she asked, looking in between us.

"Rose-"

"How long?" she repeated, shouting.

"Since Thanksgiving," I said softly, cringing at her response.

"You've been involved with him for almost a month?" she asked incredulously. She put her hands over her face and shook her head. "I don't understand. He's supposedly dating that chick he just made a movie with. You're going out with Jacob Black on New Year's."

"It's all part of the cover," I replied.

"You're lying to everyone, then? It's not just me?" She looked at me almost pleadingly.

"Not exactly," I mumbled.

"What?"

"Um, our families know and Jacob, of course. Angela knows. And Emmett found out the night Royce..."I trailed off awkwardly.

"I see," she said acidly. "So, I'm the only one you can't trust."

"That's not it and you know it," I said sharply. "You have no fucking brain-mouth filter sometimes, Rosalie. I don't want my life to change because I love him. I like being nameless, being able to blend into the crowd. I can't do that if everyone finds out about us. Do you know what they would do to us? They'd crucify us."

"And you think I'd go blab it all over town?" I could see the hurt flash in her eyes.

"No." I could feel tears building in my eyes. "I should have told you. I'm sorry."

"Don't you fucking cry on me, Bella Swan." She bit down on her lip so that she didn't cry as well, a sight I'd never seen until now. Once she was sure she was calm, she spoke. "So, you're happy?"

"Extremely."

She nodded and looked around. "The apartment looks good. Who did it?"

"I did," Edward replied. "Merry Christmas?"

She laughed once and shook her head. "Of course." She shifted uncomfortably. "I'm going back to Emmett's to pack. We leave in the morning. Are you staying here or with him?" she asked me.

"At his house."

"I'll call you when I get to my parents' and let you know I've arrived safely so you don't worry. Does this," she gestured between Edward and me, "mean you'll be moving out soon?"

"No, you reject. We just signed another year's lease on this place over the summer. I wouldn't leave that on you."

"All right." She started out the door. "Bella?" she asked, twisting her body to look at me again. "I'm not going to let something like that slip. You could have told me."

I nodded sadly and tried to swallow the knot of regret back down.

"Oh, by the way. I've contacted a lawyer. We're going after an undisclosed amount of money, a job, and demanding that Royce go into a treatment facility."

"Good," Edward and I replied in unison.

"I'll see you in a couple weeks."

And with a wink, she was out the door.


	14. Chapter 14

**So, this certain little Japanese vamp keeps wondering when the shit is going to hit the fan...so I thought I'd just tell you all. It'll build after the ball. K?**

**Thanks for the reviews. A lot of you guys thought Rosalie was going to flip out, but I hated to make her that much of a bitch. She's not over it though...**

**Edward in scrubs and steamy, sweaty hospital sex. OH MY! There's a new contest starting up-The DoctorDoctor Contest. Check it out, spread the word. Here's the link:**

**http:/ www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/u/2214432/DoctorDoctorContest**

* * *

Chapter 14

**Edward**

"Hurry the hell up, baby ," Bella laughed. "I'd like to get everything almost done before Angela and Ben get here."

I stopped chopping the onion and glared at her with watery eyes. "I'd rather not lose a finger, love. I use those for a great deal of other things."

"Like?" she prompted.

I put the knife down on the counter and stalked over to her. "I think you know," I said roughly. "It seems to be my sole purpose in life."

Her eyes glimmered with mirth. "I'm still not sure I understand. What's your sole purpose in life?"

"To please you," I said, running my tongue over the graceful line of her neck. "In every way."

She let out a shaky breath against my ear, and I had to fight back a moan as the sensation of it shot through me. "Every way?"

I hummed in agreement. "I think I do a fairly decent job, don't you agree?" I asked rhetorically. "Intellectually. Emotionally. Physically." I trailed my fingers under her shirt and over her abdomen. And then abruptly turned away from her to finish chopping the onion. "You didn't answer."

She stood completely still as she struggled to regain her composure. "You're cruel."

I laughed. "I'm no such thing."

"Fine. A tease."

I shook my head, still smiling. "You were the one who said you wanted to get everything almost finished before Angela and Ben got here. I'm merely adhering to your wishes."

"Two can play this game, Edward," she warned.

I glanced up to see her face beautifully flustered and took in a ragged breath as the aching desire I had for her pulsed violently inside me. "I should get you worked up a bit more often. Your face is incredibly gorgeous when you blush."

Her hand shot up to feel the heat of her cheek. "Damn. I hate that."

"And I love it. Looks like we have a problem there," I said lightly. "Tell me," I said changing the subject, "what is it exactly about being famous you despise so much?"

"I um, I..." she stammered, unsure of what to say.

"I'm not looking to start an argument. I'm just extremely curious. I've been giving it some thought recently. I know I said I'd do anything to keep it quiet, and I'm not changing that-it goes back to the pleasing you comment." I flashed her a crooked grin. "But sometimes I feel like I should be offended that you don't want to be seen with me."

I'd been thinking about it all week. Now that James had in a way become privy to Bella's connection with me, I wondered how long it would take him to actually connect the two of us together-intimately. And because of that, I was beginning to look into ways to make the transition easier for Bella so that she wasn't catapulted into the spotlight.

So that she didn't leave me behind a broken man.

"You're offended?" she asked in surprise.

I frowned. "Not particularly. Like I said, I feel like I should be."

I couldn't explain it. I knew rationally that most people would be offended that the person they loved didn't want to be seen in public with them, but I knew in my heart it wasn't me that Bella didn't want to be seen with. It was the image I'd created. The Edward Masen the world thought they knew. The Edward Masen that seemed to create mass hysteria when he went out somewhere. The person who knew for a fact he starred in plenty of women's fantasies and whose face was the screensaver on a number of laptops.

Which in all honesty sometimes creeped me out.

And it was inexplicably comforting to know she didn't want to be seen with me. That she loved _me _and not the image. That she wasn't in some way using me for something like so many others would. Like one specific girl did.

She sagged against the counter. "I told you I was fucked up." I lifted my brows questioningly. "It scares the shit out of me. For no good reason, really."

"You can't elaborate on that?"

She sighed. "I'm scared to change my life. I'm Bella Swan. Plain, simple, smart, Bella Swan. I've had my nose in books since I could remember, trying to make my life better. To make something of myself. I've worked so hard to get where I am. What if being with you changes all that?"

"How do you mean?"

"I've changed since I met you. For the better. But what if being thrust into the public eye changes me for the worse? What if people start treating me differently just because I'm your girlfriend, fiancée, wife-whatever the title? I don't want to be offered jobs or anything else because of my connection with you." She shook her head. "It goes back to this stupid need of mine to do everything myself. And I'm afraid that being surrounded by paparazzi all the time will rip us apart. Because there's no way they'll let something like this, a relationship with your assistant-your college student assistant-go by without trying to bring you down in the process. Besides that, it looks like you're a cheater, because of the Tanya bullshit you've got going on right now."

"Then I'll get rid of her, figuratively speaking, of course." I went to her so that I could cradle her face in my hands. "Those are all rational fears," I conceded. "But do you really think us that weak? You honestly think a few photographers will break us apart? What happened to being the exception?"

"I think I'm that weak," she said softly.

I shook my head vehemently. "You're the strongest person I've ever known. And you must know by now that no matter how we do things, someone's bound to eventually find out. It could be months from now, five years from now, but eventually someone outside our circle will know. I'm doing everything I can to make sure that you don't leave me when it happens." Her eyes widened. "That our children aren't subjected to the endless barrage of cameras in their faces. But the press, they'll always be there. Especially when our children are young. It's just how it is." I looked seriously at her. "Can you handle that?"

"I don't know." She shifted her gaze to the floor.

I sighed heavily and moved away from her. "Not exactly the answer I was hoping for," I admitted.

"I'm sorry," she said thickly.

I nodded. "I've rearranged my entire life for you, Bella, because no one can move me from you. You're mine and I am yours. I'll never be able to leave you, even if you run away from this thing we have together. But you aren't doing that for me. You've given up nothing, but then again, I've never expected you to. So, let me tell you how I see it as of right now." I waited until she looked back up at me. "You want to be with me as long as it's easy. As long as it's like this." I gestured around the kitchen with my hand. "But when it gets hard, you want no part of it. How am I not supposed to be hurt by that?"

A tear fell down her cheek. "I can't live without you, Edward."

I stared at her impassively, because I had the sickening feeling, tightening my gut, that when things got hard, she was going to run. And kill me in the process.

"We'll see," I finally said. "Now, what are we doing with this onion?" I asked, signaling the conversation was over.

I silently moved beside Bella in the kitchen, helping her finish dinner and learning a few tricks in the process while going over the plans I had to spend the evening with her the night before my family arrived as a sort of personal, private Christmas together. I promised not to buy her a gift, and while it was pure torture not to, I was a man of my word. But she'd never specified that I couldn't do something at all, so I was determined to make it the best Christmas she'd ever had. To make our first Christmas together special.

I had even more riding on it now that I'd had that horrid conversation with her earlier about the press.

I needed to find a way to make myself indispensable to her. I knew she loved me, truly and wholly, but she was always so frightened of the most inconsequential things. It made me realize how young she really was.

It didn't matter to me what the public thought of my relationship with her-not anymore. I'd shout it from the rooftops proudly like some twit in a film if she'd let me. She was finally past the fear of the enormity of her love for me and us making a life together, but now, I was hindered again by yet another of her fears-fear of the limelight she would share with me if more than just our friends and family knew about us.

I wanted to ask her to marry me, but knew it was too soon. I might be able to bind her to me legally, but if word got out, she'd still run-ring or no ring. I needed to find a way to make her see that she could withstand anything, and that while I may feel trapped occasionally in this life of mine, at least I wasn't hiding myself. I wasn't being honest with the world, but there was a reason for that. I was protecting my family.

Wasn't that in essence what I was doing with Bella? Protecting her from being pushed into a life she didn't want? Just like I did with Alice, Esme, and Carlisle?

_You can't push her into this. It's only been a month._

With that thought, I decided to use one of the many things we had in common against Bella-stubbornness. Because I could be patient on the outside, even if inside I was screaming, and calmly, methodically, _relentlessly_ chip away at that fear that surrounded her so that one day-hopefully soon-she could shrug it away.

* * *

"Ang!" Bella squealed, racing out the front door and to the petite brunette that was standing in my drive.

"Bella!" She hugged Bella quickly and then pulled back to look at the house. "Jeez, this is some place."

"I know. Come on." Bella led Angela towards me with a beaming smile on her face. She looked so happy, my face lit up in its own returning smile. "Ang-this is Edward. Edward-Angela Weber."

"It's lovely to meet you, Angela," I said honestly.

Her mouth opened a few times and her dark eyes darted back and forth between Bella and I nervously. "I...I...I..."

Bella giggled. "Don't be nervous." A blush crept up on Angela's face, but it wasn't near as pleasing as Bella's. "And don't be embarrassed. I did the same thing the first day I met him."

Angela's eyes went wide. "Really?"

Bella nodded. "Actually, I made myself look like a total fucking moron. He's too pretty for words."

"I resent that, love," I teased, draping my arm over her shoulder and kissing her temple. "Come in, won't you? Would you like some wine?" I asked Angela.

"Um, okay."

"Dinner's almost ready," I said casually, glancing over at the clock as I poured her glass.

I handed her the goblet and then leaned on the counter as I watched her eye the golden liquid warily. She took a sip and then almost moaned. "This is really good. I've never had wine this good."

"I'm sure you've only had the rubbish they try to pass off as wine at the bar down the street," I said with a crooked grin. The doorbell rang and I eased myself up so that I could answer the door. "Excuse me for a moment."

I left the room and shook my head at the giggles that I heard from the kitchen behind me. I opened the door and grinned at Ben, who looked around apprehensively. "Where is everyone?"

"Bad news, mate. Seems everyone cancelled. Looks like it's just you, me, and a couple of giggly girls."

His head snapped up as he heard the laughs come from the kitchen again. "Oh, I should go. I don't think I should-"

"I want you to meet my girl," I said, cutting off any excuse he had to leave.

"Your girl?" he asked in confusion and then realization colored his face. "The girl who's not Tanya?"

"The girl who's not Tanya." I walked towards the kitchen, expecting him to follow me out of morbid curiosity. He didn't disappoint.

I walked directly over to Bella and wrapped my arms around her as I nuzzled into her neck. Ben stopped as soon as he stepped foot into the room and stared me in disbelief. "I'd like you to meet Ben Cheney, love. Ben-this is my..." I trailed off and smirked at Bella. "Girlfriend. Bella Swan."

"Hi, Ben," Bella said, moving away from me to shake his hand. "It's nice to meet you. This is my friend Angela Weber. Ang-meet Ben."

Angela narrowed her eyes at Bella and then gave Ben a polite smile. "Nice to meet you. You're an actor, too, right?"

His eyes darted around like someone trapped. He straightened himself up and smiled back. "Yep. Got my first big role in _Rogue_ with Masen, here."

Angela knocked her goblet against the granite with nerves, causing the glass to break and liquid to run down the front of the cupboard and puddle onto the floor. "Oh, my God. I'm so sorry," she said to me apologetically.

"It's quite all right. This house has seen plenty of accidents since Bella started working for me."

"Hey! I can't help it that I'm clumsy!" Bella said with a laugh as she threw a hand towel to Angela.

"Let me help you with that," Ben said quickly, rushing over to her and giving her a hand.

Bella and I merely stood back and watched.

Dinner was full of laughter and conversation; the four of us got along perfectly. I told everyone a few stories about set fiascoes and pranks that I'd been a part of, and Ben talked about his inane Midwestern family. Bella started telling us about some of Reneé's previous phases, and when she got to the phase about Reneé's obsession with Roswell when she was twelve, Angela launched into telling Ben about her twin brothers who loved anything astronomical.

"I think we should let them get acquainted on their own," I said softly so that only Bella could hear me.

"I think I agree."

Bella and I went into the study and relaxed on the loveseat together with books in our hands. After a while, Bella shifted and looked at me.

"What's going on in that mind of yours?" I questioned.

"We are fuckawesome match makers," she said with a smirk.

"We are. But I'd rather not make it habitual. I enjoy my free time. It allows me to do other things."

"Like what?" she asked coyly.

"Oh, don't act shy, love," I responded salaciously. "You know exactly what I like to do in my free time. It involves things like you writhing under me naked."

Her eyes grew heavy and dark. "Now, that's not fair to say something like that and not act on it."

"Who said I wasn't going to act on it?" I asked, cocking my brow.

"Wha-?"

I grabbed her legs and pulled her down on the loveseat so that she was lying down and quickly covered my mouth with hers. I cupped her breast through the thin fabric of her shirt and felt her nipple pebble up instantly. My hips ground into hers, wanting her to feel the desperation that had rocketed through me in a matter of mere moments, while I continued to delve my tongue into her amazing mouth.

She moaned. "Nice hardware there, Ace."

I chuckled and kissed her again, letting my hand roam freely over her.

She abruptly pulled back, panting with flushed skin; I groaned at the sight. "I'll try," she said in a rush. "Get rid of the beard and after the news frenzy dies down we'll start going out in public and you can do whatever it is that actors do when they get involved with someone. I don't want to make you think you're not worth all the hard parts that go with being in a relationship."

I sat up and stared at her in astonishment. "Are you sure?"

She bit her lip. "I'm sure about you. All the other things, I can learn to live through."

I crashed my mouth down to hers and kissed her greedily. "God, I love you," I mumbled against her skin as I worked my way to her neck.

She giggled breathlessly. "I love you." Her teeth grazed down my neck until she reached its juncture with my shoulder and she bit down. "Think we have time for a quickie?"

"We'll make time," I growled, reaching under her shirt and moving my hand up towards her breasts.

"Oh, shit!" Ben yelled, throwing his hand over his eyes. "Sorry. I'll just go back-"

"It's all right," I told him. "You don't have to leave." Bella and I exchanged quick looks as I moved away from her. "It was rude of us to disappear like that."

Bella gave me a quick kiss and darted out of the door, no doubt completely mortified.

He laughed. "From the looks of it, it would have been rude for the two of you to stay."

I made a face. "I have better manners than that."

He laughed. "You're robbing the cradle," he pointed out. "She's younger than me, isn't she?"

I nodded. "She is."

"But it's obvious you're crazy for each other."

I chuckled. "Yes. It's bound to be the demise of our secret relationship. As you've just witnessed, we have issues keeping our hands to ourselves."

"You know, I should probably kick your ass for this," he said casually as he sat in the chair across from me.

"Bring it on," I grinned.

"But, I can't seem to make myself get mad that you lied and set me up on a blind date. Because Angela's...amazing. We're going out after the holidays."

I didn't bother to stop the cocky smile that spread across my features. "Is that so?"

"Don't get too cocky, Masen. It's just a date."

"If you say so," I returned. "So, what about Jessica? She certainly doesn't seem like the type to let you go out on a date with someone else while you're still seeing her. She seems like the type who might geld you if you did."

His hand instinctually went down to his crotch and he cringed. "I'd rather keep my balls in tact so I'm going to head across the street later and talk to her." He let out a quick breath. "You saved my ass, Edward. I was going to ask that girl to marry me in a few days. Now, I can't believe I was stupid enough to think that she'd make me happy."

"We all make mistakes."

He eyed me curiously. "Like Lauren Mallory?"

I gaped at him in shock. "How do you know about Lauren?"

"Word gets around," he replied with a shrug.

I shifted uncomfortably with the thought of the girl who I'd let into my life, only to find that she was using me to further her own career. My most recent ex, she was the girl who sent me into a two year voluntary abstinence from sex. I'd broken anything we had off with when I learned of her lack of feelings toward me. Thinking about it now, I realized that the reason I hadn't been upset with the end of our relationship was because I never really loved her-not like I loved Bella. She filled the lonely nights and warmed the empty side of my bed, when she stayed. She was someone that was willing to put herself in the spotlight and make empty conversation while standing at my side at any and every event I was forced to attend-though it was for an ulterior motive.

But I had to hand it to her, she was now one of Hollywood's highest paid actresses. She got what she wanted thanks to the networking she'd been able to do while she was with me.

"Exactly like Lauren."

* * *

**Bella**

I flopped down on the sofa in my apartment and breathed in the new leather scent. I checked the machine for any messages, expecting to hear Rosalie's voice, only to find nothing but call after call from journalists wishing to talk to her. In three days, I'd gotten nothing back from her except for a single text with the words 'We're here'. It may have seemed like she'd taken the news of my relationship with Edward well, but it was obvious she was still hurt and holding a grudge. In three years, she'd never gone this long without speaking to me. Usually, a fight between us lasted for a span of a few hours at most. I knew that I'd really, really screwed up by not telling her sooner.

I closed my eyes and sighed. I came here to get a few things I'd forgotten to bring with me to Edward's house, and instead, I was laying on the couch and trying not to get nervous with the thought of meeting his family tomorrow.

I was sure he'd built me up, made me seem like the perfect girl to them.

_Way to put the pressure on, jackass._

I was bound to screw it up somehow. Let some sort of profane curse slip out of my mouth, bumble like a fucking idiot, trip and fall flat on my face when I went to shake hands with them. I was so ridiculously rough around the edges and abrasive. There was no way I could be anything like the polished, well-bred girls Edward should be with. I needed Rosalie here to tell me to buck up and quit being such a fucking baby about it. Everyone meets the parents and lives.

I actually felt better when I pictured her telling me that.

My phone rang and I pulled it out, hoping it was Rosalie returning one of my many calls.

"Hey," I said sadly to Edward.

"Hey, yourself. You sound upset. Still haven't heard from Rosalie?"

"God, why do you have to be so perceptive? Aren't men supposed to be oblivious to everything but themselves?"

He laughed. "I'm an incredible boyfriend. Just admit it and get it over with."

Now it was my turn to laugh. "Whatever, freak. What do you want?"

"Well, I was hoping I could convince you to come home, but now I want to know what's gotten you so upset."

"Silent treatment," I answered. "I've called Rose something like twenty times and heard nothing in return."

"She'll talk to you when she gets back. You blindsided her a bit, love. You need to give her time to get over it."

I snorted inelegantly, thus proving my unrefined point above. "If she does."

"She will. I miss you. Come home," he commanded.

"I am home," I retorted.

"Listen to me you little smart arse, get home this instant, or I'm going out and buying you a great, big Christmas present."

My jaw dropped. "You blackmailing shit!"

He hummed. "The gift I wanted to buy you was over fifty thousand dollars. I can call and have them gift wrap it on my way there."

"I'm coming!" I shouted, sitting up and putting my shoes on. "Give me five minutes, and I'll be on my way."

"Don't speed. I'd rather not spend Christmas in a hospital room."

"Yes, Daddy."

I knew he'd be rolling his eyes. "I'll show you daddy," he growled.

"Is that a promise?" I asked in a breathy voice. He was so much fun to goad.

He growled again so I giggled. "Isabella Swan, I'll come over there and kidnap you if I have to."

"No need for violence. " I ran around the house, grabbing things at random, and then went back towards the door. "I'm on my way."

"Good."

I hung up and then grabbed the magazines that were jammed in the mailbox.

_Oh, goody. I made the cover. Of every single one._

Well, I wasn't the target so I supposed it was good practice for when Edward and I were spotted out as a couple. I sat down in my car and started flipping through the pages. A blurry picture of me and Rosalie sitting on the bumper of the ambulance were next to a picture of Edward and Royce talking outside The Ivy.

I ran my finger over his face. Did he have any idea what he meant to me?

No, probably not because every time he turned around I was saying something else dumber than shit. I didn't know how to explain that the fear of being in the spotlight was fed by my own insecurity.

Sure, I didn't want to see his reputation destroyed by his involvement with me. I didn't want to be favored and used for a way for people to get to Edward-especially if he was still in the public eye. I didn't want my life to change just because I happened to fall in love with an actor. But I could learn to deal with being the well-known significant other of a popular actor if those were the only reasons. Because who gave a shit what people thought about us? Because I could adapt, keep my maiden name so that I wasn't automatically associated with Edward Masen. Everything I'd told him had been the truth. It was just a truth I could learn to deal with and get past.

The reality was, I was afraid of the nasty things people would say about us. More specifically, me. There was no telling what kind of speculation would come of me being with Edward. Gold digger, fame whore-the insults just flew out at me.

I was learning with him. Edward was my first, true, serious relationship. He was my first love and the first man I allowed to really see _me_. I was making mistakes left and right, but I hoped that one day, I'd wake up and finally believe that no matter what people thought of us, I was good enough for him. I was good enough to stand by his side in front of fans, press, studio execs, and not just when we were at home-where I knew I belonged.

Soon, he'd let his publicist leak things out about his pseudo-relationship with Tanya. Constant fights and whatever else they claimed tore them apart would be all over the place.

I was guessing I only had a few months to get myself together and be the girl Edward deserved and needed in his life.

And I was going to try like hell to do it.

I made my way back to Edward's house and ignored curious Jessica Stanley's stare when I punched in the security code for the gate. She couldn't see Edward's garage from her house. There was no way she could know when I came and went, which couldn't have been more perfect since I didn't want her to know that I spent the night at my boss' house...frequently.

I grabbed everything out of the car and rushed into the kitchen, only to stop short of Edward standing before me in a perfectly tailored black suit, wearing a devilish grin and swinging a tiny blood red dress by the hanger in his hand. His coppery hair took on a deeper tone against the black and his pale skin was flawless. I had the sudden urge to grab that black tie he was wearing and pull his mouth to mine and then do a shitload of other dirtier things.

"Hello," I said in surprise. "What are you up to?"

He held the dress out to me. "I believe this is yours." I took the dress warily. "We're going out."

"Out?" I asked, shocked. He nodded. "_Out_ out?"

"I believe we've established the fact that we are indeed going out," he said dryly.

I circled around him, trailing my index finger lightly over the suit. "You look fucking hot. I think I'd rather just stay here and take this off you." I raked him with my gaze. "Yeah, maybe leave the tie on. I rather like you in a tie, Masen."

He yanked me against him and let the curves of my body melt into the strong lines of his so that I was merely a puddle of need at his feet. "I'll hold you to that." He leaned down and gave me a quick, hard kiss. "Later. But first, we're celebrating Christmas together. Without families and friends and like a normal, average, everyday couple."

"How do you mean?" I asked obtusely.

"Well, I believe we agreed to not buy each other anything..."

"Yeah." I held the dress up. "But I think you did anyway."

He rolled his eyes. "Well, you weren't specific with the details so I'm assuming that a date would not be a violation of said agreement."

"You're taking me out on a date? Like a date date?" I asked giddily.

"Is there a specific reason keep using words twice in a row? And are you planning to continue this for the rest of the evening?" He shot me a crooked grin.

I stared at him drolly. "No."

He tucked a stray piece of hair back behind my ear. "I want to take you out for Christmas. We so rarely get out of this house," he said softly.

"Are we going to have to pretend to be indifferent towards each other all night?"

"I can't tell you that." He turned me around and smacked my ass hard enough that a loud 'pop' went through the room-I yelped. "Get dressed. We have dinner reservations in an hour."

I ran to the bedroom and shaved again, then slapped on some lotion before I slid the dress over my body. I stood at the mirror and stared at my reflection, biting my lip.

The dress was gorgeous. I ran my hand over the fabric and frowned. It was a cap-sleeved bandage dress that hugged my body perfectly and came to my mid-thigh. I thought my hair should be up, but I couldn't be sure. I wanted to look really good and normally, I relied on Rosalie for that.

_Damn it._

I settled for letting my hair fall into waves, like usual, and rimmed my eyes with a smoky black liner. I put some chapstick on my lips and threw on the strappy gold heels I just happened to have here and then checked my reflection again.

As always, this was as good as it gets.

I went back into the kitchen and giggled when Edward spotted me. "I'm surprised your jaw's still attached there, buddy." I spun around. "Look okay?"

"I thought the dress would look good on you when I saw it, but my God, Isabella, you look incredible," he breathed.

He pushed my hair off my shoulder and started nibbling on the exposed skin there. "Hey, now. We'll be late."

He merely moaned and moved to my chest.

"Edward!" I laughed. "You have to pretend like you're not interested in me."

"I just want to take advantage of you in this dress for a moment," he murmured.

I waited a beat. "Okay, moment's over." Even though I wanted nothing more than to let him take me right here, I knew he'd be angry with himself if he ruined any part of tonight.

He chuckled and placed one final kiss under my jaw before reaching over and grabbing a black jacket off the counter. After he slipped it over my shoulders, he led me out to the Aston Martin where he of course, opened and closed the door for me.

I shifted anxiously in my seat as he drove us to our destination. We wound through the city until he parked behind a restaurant in an alley. I leaned forward and tried to figure out where we were, unsuccessfully.

He silently came over and helped me out of the car before leading me to a door. He knocked a few times and was greeted by a few of the chefs working in the kitchen.

We were led to a private dining room where candles and flowers were scattered everywhere. I sat down and skimmed the soft petals of the candy striped tulips sitting in the middle of the table.

"You didn't seem like the type to appreciate roses," Edward said with a smile.

I looked around again. The lights were off, the room solely illuminated by the candles. It was so romantic.-large chandeliers, bold red swags covering the windows, and thickly upholstered seating. The candlelight flickered across Edward's nervous face and I finally let out the air I'd been holding in-loudly.

"How did you do all this?" I asked in wonder.

"I called a few weeks ago and made arrangements with the owner. Every employee has signed a confidentiality agreement so, we won't be sold out to the press," he explained.

"You went through so much trouble..."

His brow knit. "Trouble?"

I nodded. "Trouble." I looked around again, this time in appreciation for all the planning Edward had put into just a simple dinner out together. "Thank you."

"Do you like it?"

I grinned. "Let me eat first, and I'll let you know."

Almost as if the waiter had been listening in, wine and scallops were brought out to us. Edward moved closer to me while we ate, his fingers winding their way into my hair and skimming over the back of my neck. I bit back a few moans as his touch sent shivers down my spine.

We ate Cote de Boeuf-or so Edward told me-but nothing outside of this room existed. We were in our own little world, constantly touching each other and enjoying the normality of the moment. I watched his eyes deepen with emotion, the crinkling of the skin around them when he smiled and unconsciously ran my thumb over that rippled skin.

"How is it that a man who's almost forty has no wrinkles?" Edward's brows raised up at my question. "The only time I see them is when you smile or when you're angry."

"Is that so?" He smiled at me again.

I studied his face and lifted my hand again to touch it. "You smile and your eyes crinkle and you can see where you should have laugh lines." I lightly trailed the faint line between his brows. "This line shows when you're mad." I sat back and gave him a wicked grin. "Have you had work done?"

He laughed loudly. "No, Isabella, I have not had work done. I've just lived a clean life. I don't drink often, I've never smoked, I eat healthy, work out. And it's not only for my career. It's a part of who I am."

"Maybe I should work out with you. Because not only do you look good, you've got some pretty amazing stamina for an old guy."

He shot me a crooked grin. "I've saved it all for you, love."

"Good to know."

He took me to the ballet, which excited me like a fat kid in a candy store. When met with his curious look, I explained to him that as I child I loved ballet and wanted nothing more than to grow up to be one of the graceful women that were up on stage, but since I was cursed with inherent clumsiness, that dream died young.

We watched a performance of _The Nutcracker_, which was fitting since he'd played Tchaikovsky for me that first time on his piano, and it was honestly some of the only classical music I knew.

We got home and he led me to the bedroom, slowly removing my shoes and unzipping my dress while I worked on taking off his suit. He let the dress pool at my feet and once we were both naked, he lifted me to the bed and laid me down gently, reverently.

It was like our first weekend together. That intense need for one another was still there, but it stayed buried underneath the surface. His large hands skimmed and caressed, gently cupped and dipped inside me. Everything I'd felt for him that first time came flooding back to me, tenfold. He meant more to me than I'd ever thought possible. It was more than love. It was beyond any words of any language-indescribable.

My hands moved over his hard body, feeling the pale, smoothness of his skin and the way his taut muscles moved and flexed as he brought me towards release.

And when he slipped inside me, it was a slow build. Kisses were laced with emotion, looks were pierced with devotion. He kept his motions slow, rocking me into that sweet oblivion until we both came together.

I pulled him closer to me, burrowing my face in his neck while I was still wrapped around him. I heard his sigh of contentment in my ear and placed a kiss against his skin in response, almost overwhelmed with what I had inside for him.

He lifted his head and brushed the hair away from my face while a slow, soft smile curved his lips. "Merry Christmas, my love," he murmured.

"Merry Christmas, baby."

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**Cullen's start popping in next...**


	15. Chapter 15

**I actually had intended to update this yesterday, but FF's e-mail notifications were screwed up again, so I decided to wait until they got their shit together again...**

**This chapter is loooong...longer than any of the others, but it just kept going and going when I wrote it, LOL. I thought about dividing it up so that only BPOV was in this chapter, but I HATE to do that and only do it when there's not any other option. So you get 2,000 extra words instead.**

**There's a LEMON up first...**

* * *

Chapter 15

**Bella**

Edward shuffled in the kitchen with a sleepy look on his face. He yawned and pushed a hand through the insane mass of hair on his head that was a result of a restless night.

We'd spent the entire night making love. It was strange to me to think of it that way, but there it was. He didn't fuck me once. Every time was slow and gentle, tender and easy. Almost as if something had shifted between us last night and instead of being two people in love, who happened to have mind-blowing orgasms with each other, we were somehow...more.

"Hey! You look exhausted!" I said cheerfully, drizzling raspberry sauce on the chocolate cake I'd made.

His eyebrow raised slightly at my tone. "I am. How are you not?"

I held up the mug that contained my third cup of coffee to him. "Coffee." I was wired.

He grunted. "I think I could use some."

"What time is everyone getting here?" I needed to try to mentally prepare myself for their arrival today. I wasn't nervous yet, but I was assuming it was because I was so jittery with all the caffeine I'd put in my system this morning.

"Erm, six this evening, if I recall correctly. I promised Carlisle and Esme we'd meet them at the airport."

"They're not renting a car?"

"They are. But Esme will want to see me as soon as possible. It's typical." He took the first sip of his coffee, hot and black, and sighed. "Good God, that's nice."

I giggled. "What happened to all that built-up stamina, lover boy?"

He rolled his eyes and struggled not to smile. "I think it stops after the fourth time, _honey._"

My nose scrunched up with the endearment. "I don't think I like that one."

"Good, me either." He finally looked around at the mess I'd made of his kitchen. "What the bloody hell have you been doing in here? Throwing flour on my walls?" His finger trailed through some of the egg I'd dropped. "Cracking eggs on my counter?" As if that one little sip of caffeine had jolted him awake, he finally noted my appearance and flashed me an amused lopsided smile. "You have flour in your hair. And chocolate on your face."

"I was sleepy when I started," I said defensively. "So, I was a little clumsier than usual."

He grinned mischievously at me. "I must say, it smells something like heaven in here. What is that, exactly?"

"Homemade chocolate layer cake with raspberry sauce," I answered, watching his eyes widen with satisfaction. "It's my Grandma Swan's recipe."

"You went all out this morning." He slid up next to me and inhaled deeply as his nose ran over my jaw. "You smell edible." He placed a quick kiss on my cheek and stepped back. "Have fun cleaning."

My mouth popped open in shock. "You're not going to help me?"

"Not my mess," he laughed.

"But, I did it for your parents!" I scowled at the amount of work that was around me. For a fleeting moment I considered leaving it on the housekeeper, but I couldn't do that to the woman. "Well, fuck."

He put his mug in the sink and grinned crookedly again. "Chin up, love. It's not so bad."

I flung raspberry sauce at him thoughtlessly. And then burst into a fit of laughter at his startled reaction.

He wiped a hand across his broad chest, smearing the fuchsia colored line that had splattered across it. "Oh, you'll pay for that." A slow, cat-like smile spread across his face.

In a blur of movement, he had his finger in the remainder of the sauce and ran a sticky trail over my face. He dipped his finger in his mouth with a wicked gleam in his eye. "It's good. My compliments to the chef."

My tongue snaked out to lick the raspberry sauce that was oozing over my top lip and watched Edward's eyes darken with the action. I kept flicking my tongue out to collect more of the sauce, keeping my eyes locked on his blackened ones, while my hand slowly moved over to the bowl. I scooped some of the sauce off my cheek with one finger and then sucked down on my finger while I gathered sauce in my other hand.

Intent on using Edward's face to wipe my hand off with, I reached out to him, only for him to jerk away from me at the last second. "Shit!" I giggled.

Before I could get back to it, Edward had the bowl in his hands and was taking a step towards me. "No!" I shrieked, and then raced out of the room with Edward right after me.

I ran into his bedroom and stood up on his bed, glaring playfully down at him. "You wouldn't in your bed."

"I would." He lithely jumped onto the bed and dumped the rest of the sauce down the front of my shirt before I even had a chance to think about moving. He gave me a disapproving look. "Would you look at that? Now you're all dirty, Miss Swan."

The shirt was being slowly sucked to my skin, the sauce leaking through the fabric and revealing my pebbled nipples. I bit my lip and listened to the sharp exhale through his nose, causing every hormone in my body to fire rapidly. I deliberately pulled the shirt over my head and slowly moved my hand up my body and then licked my hand clean of the sauce, because God I needed him again. I started to repeat the movement, but Edward's hand captured my wrist instead. A small, smug smile tugged at my lips with the realization that he needed me just as much.

With a dark look, he shook his head mutely at me and then started licking the sauce off my breasts, teasing the taut peaks of my nipples. He tongue made a sticky trail up my neck until he met my mouth with his. I moaned as the taste of Edward mixed with the raspberries sweetened my mouth and made heat shoot through me, feeding the fire low in my belly.

He ripped my panties down my legs. "I don't even know why you bother putting these on when you wake. I always end up taking them off."

"Just to piss you off."

He threw them over his shoulder and let his fingers roam freely over the part of me that was aching for him; I thought my knees might buckle. "It's working," he murmured.

I laughed.

A flash of movement had me lying on my back with Edward hovering in between my legs. His hands were suddenly everywhere while he kissed me thoroughly. My mind swam with his passion, and I quickly pushed his pants down enough so that I could toe them off and then pulled him toward me, moaning as his hardness pressed in between my thighs.

"Edward," I breathed.

His lips turned up as he moved them down the column of my neck. "I love hearing my name on your lips."

His hand went back down to stroke my clit, and I jolted in response. "No, baby. I need _you_." I grabbed his arms and pulled them up over our heads, slowly skimming up to his hands and entwining my fingers with his while I wrapped my legs around his lean hips.

"Are you desperate for me already, love?" he asked wickedly.

"Fuck," I moaned, shifting my hips underneath his and feeling the head of his dick push toward my entrance. "Please," I begged, fluttering my eyes closed.

"You didn't answer."

I slowly opened my eyes and was surrounded by green. The green of his eyes, the celery green of the walls in his bedroom. He watched me writhe under him with his mouth set in determination and fire blazing in his jeweled eyes. Overwhelmed, I flushed even more and my breathing grew ragged as I took air into my scorching body and I realized I was desperate for him. More so than ever before.

"Say it," he commanded, pushing into me a little more.

His muscles were taut, yet shook as he struggled to keep himself still. "Jesus, yes!" I shouted at him as need bubbled frantically up inside me.

"No need to shout," he said through his teeth as he sank into me.

I would have said something sarcastic back, but he felt so good I couldn't get the words out. In and out, slow and steady, he brought us up, staring down at me the entire time. Sweat dampened his forehead, and his eyes darted down to my mouth when I pulled my lip between my teeth as I grew closer to release.

My fingers curled around his, tightening their grip on him, and my legs wrapped themselves around his waist tighter as I clenched up around him. He grunted in time with his movements and his face became an intense mask of concentration as he waited me out. Our eyes stayed locked together as I came violently around him, screaming out with the intensity and pulling him with me. He came inside me with his face contorted in pleasure and a low groan accompanying his final thrust.

He lowered his face to nuzzle into my neck and then rolled us so that the brunt of his weight wasn't on me. I ran my hands through his hair and smiled at the way he leaned into my touch.

"For someone who woke up so sleepy, you sure are playful this morning," I teased.

"I'm excited," he replied honestly. "I haven't seen Alice since July and it's been since last winter that I saw Carlisle and Esme."

"Why?"

He shrugged one shoulder. "Scheduling conflicts."

I giggled at the way he said schedule. It always had that effect on me. Used to it, he merely rolled his eyes at me.

"They're looking forward to meeting you," he stated softly.

I tensed in his arms as panic shot through me. I'd been nervous and anxious about this for days, but suddenly the thought had finally worked its way inside my head that it was _today._ In a matter of hours, I'd most likely be making a complete ass out of myself.

"Don't you dare," he growled, reading the panic on my face. "There's nothing to worry about. They'll love you whether you behave like a woman in line for the throne or you stumble and spill your drink in my father's lap and say 'shit' and 'fuck' all night long."

I bit down on my lip and looked up at him shyly. "You're sure?"

He cupped my face in his hand and ran his thumb along the length of my jaw. "I'm sure. I love you, therefore _they'll _love you. Very simple to wrap your mind around, really."

I nodded to close the subject and then grinned at him. "We're all sticky," I hinted.

He took it and smiled back. "I suppose we'd better shower then."

"You supposed right."

Instead of immediately washing ourselves up, Edward and I decided it would be better to clean the kitchen first and put the sticky bedding in the wash beforehand so that we didn't somehow manage to get ourselves sticky again and defeat the purpose of the shower.

I went into the laundry room, still wrapped in my towel and my hair dripping down my back, to check on the bedding. I stopped in the kitchen and pouted at the cake. It didn't have enough raspberry sauce drizzled over the top to suit me, thanks to my boyfriend.

But what can you do.

There'd been such an uncharacteristic liveliness to Edward's usual calm and collected demeanor. For a moment there, he let that part of himself come unbound with something more than just a simple joke or a bit of ribbing. He was so used to keeping himself in check, keeping his heart and personality guarded so that nothing could be used against him and that his life, as well as his family's, stayed private. Not having enough sauce and a stupid cake was a small price to pay to see the man I fell in love with break free from that cool and sophisticated exterior-even for just a few minutes.

I lost my grip on my towel, causing it to flutter to the floor, just as the door to the garage opened and a tiny woman with short, spiky black hair walked in. She shrieked in shock at the same time I did, and I quickly ducked behind the island and grabbed the towel, securing it around my body, and then stood up while my entire body flushed in embarrassment.

Alice stood with a smirk on her face. "Well, I suppose I should have knocked. However, I never saw this coming," she said in a strangely accented voice. It was a mix of a lazy southern drawl and Edward's brisk English accent.

Still humiliated from Edward's gorgeous sister seeing me naked at our first meeting, I snapped at her. "Uh, you think?"

She smiled broadly, lighting up her elvin face and causing her midnight blue eyes to sparkle. She was so tiny, so gorgeous, I felt like an ogre next to her. "Feisty. No wonder my brother loves you. You're really quite beautiful, you know. I'd kill for your boobs."

My cheeks grew even hotter. "Um, thanks," I mumbled.

_Where's the fucking hole in the ground when you need it?_

Like she had read my mind, Alice answered. "Actually, it could be worse. But I think I'll save our dear Edward from the embarrassment."

"Oh, God," I groaned. "My boyfriend's psychic sister can read minds _and_ see the future. Great."

Alice's face scrunched up in distaste. "I don't pry in people's heads, Bella."

She looked so offended, I immediately mumbled an apology. This was not going well.

"Put some pants on, dear brother. I'd rather not see your manhood," Alice yelled at Edward.

I heard the squeak his heel made on the hardwood floor as he spun back around. "_Christ, Alice!"_

Alice and I were silent as we waited for Edward to join us in the kitchen. I was completely speechless and could think of nothing suitable to say to break the ice. The only thing running through my mind was a string of profanities at being caught naked by Alice Cullen. I glanced back over at her and scowled at the amused expression on her face.

Wearing a pair of black basketball shorts, he crossed the room and took my face in his hands. God, I wanted to just eat him up. "Bella? I heard you scream. Are you all right?" he asked worriedly, running his gaze over me. "Did you hurt yourself?"

"She's fine," Alice replied. "I just gave her a bit of a scare."

Edward eyed the towel I was clinging on to for dear life warily and then shook his head in disgust. "Alice, you didn't."

"What?" She put her hands on her tiny hips. "It's not my fault the two of you are sex fiends."

"There are things like mobiles and doorbells," he retorted. "You didn't need to embarrass the shit out of her."

"I vaguely saw her standing in the kitchen in her towel, but I didn't see her dropping it. I thought that by Jasper and I arriving a few hours earlier would head it off. My mistake. I'm not infallible." She raised her hand flippantly. "Like I was saying, it could be worse, Edward."

"What do you mean?" Edward asked slowly. "And where is Jasper, exactly?"

"Unloading the luggage from the trunk." She poked her head out the door and told Jasper to give her a few minutes before coming inside. "Where were we?" she asked, turning back to us. "Oh, yes. If I rang the doorbell, no one would answer, so of course being the impatient girl that I am, I let myself inside where Jasper and I caught you in the middle of...it." I buried my face in Edward's chest. "And then if I called the same thing happened. Every other flight I tried to book had that exact outcome except one."

"Why didn't you take that one?" Edward growled.

"Because it arrived five minutes prior to Mum and Dad's flight which meant that they would have been here to witness Bella's nakedness as well. I thought this was the lesser of the evils." She grinned at Edward. "She's really quite stunning, brother. Well done."

His lips twitched in amusement. "I know she is." He bent down and pressed a kiss to my hair and released me. "I missed you, darlin'," he said to Alice.

She beamed and jumped on him to give him a hug. "I missed you, too!" she squealed.

She started talking so fast, I couldn't understand her while she was wrapped around Edward's tall frame so that she could see eye to eye with him, since he was a good fifteen inches taller than she. He laughed the perfect, genuine laugh he usually only had reserved for me at whatever she was saying to him. She'd managed to bring out that light in him again in just seconds of being with him.

The entire situation felt so fucking surreal.

I mumbled something about getting dressed and then practically sprinted into the bedroom to hide. I'd just gotten my jeans buttoned up when there was a knock on the door. Expecting Edward, I threw open the door, wanting nothing more than the comfort of his arms and a chance to whine for a minute, only to find Alice standing on the other side with another beaming smile on her face.

"Hi!" she said brightly, whizzing past me into Edward's room.

I stared out into the hall for a second before righting myself and turning around to face the black streak of energy that was nearly bouncing off Edward's walls. I was already drained from being in her presence for a measly five minutes.

"Hello," I said cautiously.

"Awkwardness aside, I think you are absolutely fantastic. You're a perfect match for my brother." She spoke in a cheerful rapidness, almost like her brain was forcing her tongue to move faster than was humanly possible.

"Okay." I didn't know what else to say. _My_ brain was still trying to come to terms with this hyper being in front of me.

Her eyes narrowed slightly as she looked at me. "Now if only you would believe it."

I gaped indignantly at her. "I don't disagree with you."

"Don't you?"

"No!" I cried in frustration. This was really not a conversation I was willing to have with a total stranger.

"Then why is it you hide your relationship with my brother from the world?" Her eyebrows arched as she waited my response.

I tripped over my words as I tried to explain it. Finally, giving up, I sighed. "I don't know, really. Insecurity?"

She let out a rude noise. "That's bullshit. You have nothing to be insecure about. You're smart, you're beautiful, you have incredible friends and not to mention the most handsome man in the world as your boyfriend...Well, second to Jasper."

I laughed at that.

"Lighten up and use that agressiveness I saw downstairs against anyone who tries to tell you that you and my brother aren't meant. Because they know nothing about either of you."

And I was gaping again. "How old are you, you mystical freak?"

Her tinkling laughter echoed through the room, loosening the knot of stress I'd felt from meeting her. "We'll get along just fine. As long as you promise me one thing."

I met her gaze skeptically. "What's that?"

"You go shopping with me for that dress you'll need for the ball. Though I hate to make you look good for someone else," she said to herself.

That was a terrifying thought, shopping with Alice. "I don't want to look good for Jacob."

She grinned. "Then we'll just have to make my brother speechless when he sees you. Though, I think you do that a lot as it is. He's completely besotted with you."

"He tends to have that effect on me, too," I told her honestly.

"Yes, I know. He dazzles you." She tapped her temple with her fingers. "I've seen it. Sage and all that."

"You've seen our relationship in the future?" I inquired.

"No!" She backed up laughing. "I'm not helping you at all. It's for the two of you to get to on your own."

"But we'll get there?" I suddenly needed reassurance.

She patted my arm and gave me a small smile, one that left me uneasy. "You'll get there. If your finished, would you like to meet my boyfriend now?" I nodded, making her squeal. "Oh, he's amazing. You'll love him. I promise."

I followed her back to the kitchen where Edward was talking to a tall, blond man. His back was to me, so I couldn't see his face, but his rangy build led me to believe he was just as good-looking as his girlfriend. I listened to his and Edward's conversation, captivated by the quiet, slow sound of his voice and the only word I could think of to describe Jasper was _still_. His demeanor was subdued, his movements fluid, like a tranquil lake with barely any current to ripple the calm surface. He was the paradox to Alice's natural buoyancy. I was immediately drawn to him in an effort to neutralize some of the stress I felt from being barraged by Alice's exuberance.

Alice cleared her throat. "Jazzy?"

Jasper turned around to face her with a scowl. "You know I hate that, sugar."

I had to stifle a gasp at the sight of his face. He was exactly how I'd imagined some gorgeous cowboy to look. His disheveled blond hair curled around his face and his topaz eyes were intense. His skin was tawny, tanned beautifully from the sun, and he had a dusting of whiskers over his angular jaw. But what stood out the most were the scars that danced over his arm and up his neck, mottling his golden skin and creating blank spots in his dark blond beard. Where it seemed they should make him frightening, they did the opposite. He was even more captivating. He was completely different from Edward. Edward was the personification of male perfection-tall, masculine, and beguiling in his sex appeal-and Jasper alluded a raw, powerful sort of appeal underneath that composed exterior.

It was no wonder Alice was so in love with him. I was pretty sure if I hadn't met Edward and hadn't known what it felt like to truly love someone, I might have been interested in him, too.

She giggled. "Your point is?"

He shook his head while one side of his lips lifted in an amused smile. "I don't have one."

"Jasper," Edward said with a formal tone to his voice, "this is my Bella." He grinned at me. "This is Jasper Whitlock, love. The only man I've ever known to tame my sister."

"You act like I'm some sort of nightmare," she said in annoyance.

"You are," Edward said immediately back. "You're like a kitten on too much catnip. Bouncing from one place to the next. I've never known you to be still unless you're with him."

I laughed with the mental picture it conjured, earning a narrowed glare from Alice. "I'm sorry. I barely know you, but it was the perfect description of you. You leave me feeling...dizzy. But remarkably, in a good way." I smiled widely at her.

"Just say what you mean, Bella," she said with a laugh.

"Okay. You make me feel like I've gone straight down the fucking rabbit hole and collided head on with the Mad Hatter." I blushed as soon as the words were out of my mouth. "Sorry," I said again sheepishly.

Jasper's laughter was even quiet, rumbling in his chest like thunder in the distance. "She's a lot like the rabbit, too. She'll ride your ass till it's sore if you're late."

Alice flailed her hands in the air. "Enough picking on Alice!" She started to shove Edward towards the door. "You've got to go get Mum and Dad."

I glanced at the clock and realized it was just after five. "Let me get a jacket and we can go," I said to Edward.

"No, you're staying here," Alice said sternly.

I cocked my brow.

"Bossy, isn't she?" Jasper teased.

"I'd like her to come with me, Alice." Edward gave her an irritated look.

"Trust me, brother, you want her to stay here. Unless you're ready to start the speculation of your relationship now rather than later?" She waited expectantly for his response.

"That bad?" he asked with a grimace.

"A mob. They want to get some information out of you about that horrid ex-agent of yours."

Edward ran a hand through his hair. "If I actually go pick up Mum and Dad, the press isn't going to realize they're related to me, are they? I've lasted this long without them finding anything out, I have no intention to change that now."

"No. Once you've met up with them in baggage claim, just keep your distance. They'll be much too interested in what you have to say about Royce to notice that you and Mum look a lot alike."

Edward gave me a resigned look. "Very well. I suppose I'll see you when I get back?"

"As if you have to ask," I responded with a smile.

"Right." He gave me a quick kiss on the lips and turned to leave.

"Oh, come on, Edward!" Alice called after him. "Surely you can kiss her better than that!"

"Not in front of you!" he yelled back from the garage, just before the door closed behind him.

_Shit, now I'm all alone with two virtual strangers._

I stood there awkwardly for a moment, listening to Edward's car back out of the garage, before speaking. "So, now what?"

"You're fuckin' this cat, I'm just holdin' the tail," Jasper answered.

I blanched, having no idea what he was talking about.

Alice smacked Jasper's chest. "Jazz! You don't say things like that around here! No one has any idea what you're talking about!"

"It's okay," I said lamely.

"I apologize for my boyfriend's crass behavior. He was basically telling you that you're in charge and we'll do whatever you bloody well want us to. I promise you, I had a really hard time understanding him when we first met. All those sayings..." She cringed at the memory.

Jasper chuckled under his breath. "Yeah, I told her to get her fanny in the truck on our first date and almost got slugged. I had no idea that fanny meant...um..." He looked to Alice for help.

"Oh, for God's sake, Jasper, you can say the word aloud. Vagina. It means vagina in England! Not arse!" Even though she was scolding him, you could feel the love she had for him emanating from her.

Jasper's face was slightly flushed. "I could've used a pocket translator or something those first few weeks, babe. You could've warned me that dating a British chick was gonna be like learning a new language."

I laughed at their banter. "Well, I guess I could get started on dinner."

"I'll help!" Alice offered happily.

"I'll watch. You don't want me trying to cook. Believe me," Jasper said with his hands up.

"Okay. First, I'm going to make some more raspberry sauce for the cake since um, we don't have enough." My cheeks went red as I started getting everything out of the cabinet.

"Why not?" Alice questioned.

"Um, well, we uh..." I couldn't look her in the eye.

"Oh, that's disgusting!" Alice shouted. "I could have gone my whole life without the knowledge of my brother's kinky sex habits. It's not like I don't already have to block all that out when I see images of the two of you. Now I don't even know if I can eat that cake tonight without gagging!"

My face grew even hotter.

"You're embarrassing the poor girl, Al." Jasper grinned at me. "Besides_, you_ were the one that asked. And it's not like you've not done the same thing. Only with chocolate sauce. In fact, I've been thinking we should do it again. Real soon," he said wickedly.

My face scrunched up in disgust. "Oh, TMI! I just met you people!"

Jasper laughed. "Get used to it. There's no such thing as TMI with Alice Cullen, here. She knows way too much about people for her own good. So I tend to even out the score a little."

"I can't help it! It's either embrace this weird psychic gift I was given or dive head first into the loony bin!" she argued.

"I'd rather you didn't go insane," I said honestly. "But please, let's keep my sex life out of it."

"That's most definitely _not _a problem, Bella." Alice shuddered dramatically and fought to regain her composure. "So what can I do?"

"Start the chicken?" I answered, sounding like I was asking for her approval.

She nodded. "I can do that. I'll need you to show me where everything is. My brother tends to reorganize things in between visits so I never know where anything is."

I giggled. "He is a tad OCD. Sometimes I wonder how he's not gone crazy with all the chaos I've brought into his life."

Alice patted my arm. "You've not brought chaos to his life, Bella. You've brought balance."

* * *

**Edward**

I walked back into the kitchen with my parents' suitcase in my hand and stopped abruptly at the threshold. Alice and Bella were dancing around the kitchen while they cooked, singing to some ridiculous song on the radio.

A thrill shot through my body with the idyllic scene playing out before me.

Jasper came up behind Bella and Alice and dipped his head down in between their heads, singing along loudly and horribly off-key. Bella scrunched up her nose and giggled while Alice pushed Jasper's face back with her hand.

Bella glanced up from the mound of potatoes sitting before her and her mouth dropped open in shock as she noticed me. "Oh, God! What the hell happened to you?"

I looked down at myself with a frown. My clothes seemed a little untidy but nothing was too much out of the ordinary, given the throngs of photographers and fans I'd been forced to deal with at the airport. "I look that awful?"

"Your hair's all over the place!" She crossed the room and pushed her fingers through it. I loved the chills that went through me when she did that.

"And this is unusual how?"

She rolled her eyes. "More than normal. Was it that bad?"

I leaned down to press my forehead against hers and closed my eyes. "You've no idea," I told her as my hands snaked around her waist.

"Aw," she said in a singsong voice as she brought her hands around my neck. "My poor movie star."

I thought back at Esme's face as she saw firsthand what I occasionally am forced to deal with. Blinding flashes, loud shouts and calls, relentless questioning. Not to mention the attention they attract from those surrounding us. Then, not only was I dealing with ludicrous assumptions and hurling accusations, I was forced to put on a smile and pose with my fans, all while the press yelled incessantly behind me. My eyes hurt from their lights, my hand hurt from signing so many autographs, I was fairly certain my cheeks were stained red from the numerous kisses I'd received as parting thanks.

But no matter how horrible it was at times, I still loved it. It reminded me that there are people out there who look up to me and use me as inspiration to make something of themselves. People that use my films as an escape from their harsh reality or use them to share a laugh with someone. It's what has kept me grounded and focused. Always.

Jasper snorted. "Don't let him fool you, Bella. He secretly loves the attention."

"Not the women trying to snog me in the middle of the airport," I retorted. "Nor do I enjoy listening to entertainment journalists trying to implicate me in Royce's heap of bullshit. But the autographs and requests for photos, I do. I've always enjoyed bringing smiles to people's faces."

"I do believe you've cursed more today than you have in the two and a half months I've known you." Bella grinned up at me. "I'm a bad influence."

I chuckled. "Bad day, that's all. I had you panicking this morning over meeting my family, then said family walks in my house unannounced to see you naked-"

"What?" Jasper demanded.

"Oh, yes. Your girlfriend kept you outside earlier because she walked in on my girlfriend when her towel fell to the floor. Not exactly how I'm sure Bella pictured meeting her," I answered.

"It's not like I planned it either," Alice grumbled.

"As I was saying, there's that and then the fact that I couldn't even hug my mother or father when they came to greet me. I'd have to say this has not been a day I'll remember fondly."

"But you got sex with raspberry sauce," Bella whispered with a mischievous glint in her eyes. "That's got to count for something."

I pretended to consider it. "I'd completely forgotten," I said with a broad smile. "I suppose it does negate all the bad parts of the day and puts it with the best of my entire life."

"What's your number one?" she asked, biting her lip.

"The day you told me you loved me for the first time," I said honestly.

"Good answer," she giggled.

I shrugged one shoulder and gave her a crooked smirk. "I'm not a total fool. I have learned in my long life not to anger the woman who gives you sex."

I laughed at her shocked reaction. "Well," she huffed. "See if you get lucky any for the next month."

I nuzzled her nose with mine. "I think it's safe to say that is a completely idle threat. You could last no longer than I could. In any case, I may have said that I knew better than to anger the woman who gives me sex, but that didn't mean that I spoke anything other than the truth when I told you the happiest day of my life so far was the day you told me you loved me as well."

"Good Lord, son," Jasper interjected. "You keep this shit up and I'm gonna have to make a beeline for that there toilet soon."

I gave him the finger behind Bella's back.

Jasper laughed louder than I've ever heard before. "Baby?" he asked Alice. "Did I just see Edward Masen flip me the bird?"

"I think you did," she confirmed.

"Well, I'll be. We've gotta keep this girl around. She's keepin' your dear brother from being such a pompous, arrogant, English jackass. If I didn't already have you, I'd have to steal her and see what all the fuss was about."

"Try it, redneck," I snapped back.

Bella laughed. "Possessive, are we?"

"Only with you."

Carlisle cleared his throat behind me, so I reluctantly pulled away from Bella. Carlisle was almost as tall as me, with pale blue eyes and golden hair that was finally beginning to gray at his temples and somehow was always in place. He was as I remembered him-youthful despite his age with impeccable manners and grooming. I knew he had a handsome face and a strong build-I'd been told it enough by girls in school-but to me, he was merely the man who stepped in and helped my aunt raise me when he didn't need to. His compassion and love knew no bounds, and he kept me from literally dying along with my parents in those early days without them. He was someone I would forever be grateful for and would never have the words to articulate just how much he meant to me.

"Dad," I said with an idiotic grin, "this is Bella Swan. Bella, Carlisle Cullen." I glanced around. "Where's Mum?"

"Outside reapplying her lipstick." He gave Bella and conspiratorial wink. "She wanted to look her best for Bella," he responded. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Bella. I've heard a lot about you from my wife. Apparently, her favorite topic of conversation has become that of you and our son."

Bella cast a sideways look at me. "Is that so? Does Edward speak to her about me frequently?"

Carlisle chuckled. "No, she gets most of her information from Alice. She can't seem to stop watching to two of you."

"Daddy!" Alice cried indignantly.

Carlisle shrugged his shoulders unrepentantly. "I'm not the one with the unique gift. If you don't abuse your powers, no one can rebuke you for it."

Alice crossed her arms over her chest.

"Come here, my darling. I haven't seen you in ages!" Carlisle said to Alice excitedly.

Alice rushed over to him and threw her arms around you. "I missed you, Daddy."

Carlisle buried his face in her hair and hugged her back. "I missed you, too."

I glanced at Bella who was watching with unshed tears in her eyes. Silently, I pulled her out of the kitchen and into my arms. "What's the matter, love?"

"Nothing." Her voice was muffled against my chest.

"No, it's not nothing. What is going on with you?"

"I wish I had that kind of relationship with my parents," she said quietly. "Instead I get a nutso mom and a father who treats me more like a friend than a daughter." She paused for a beat. "Unless it's about boys. Then he gets the gun."

"He didn't pull out a gun on me," I teased.

"You're a weirdo." She said like it explained everything.

I let myself laugh for a moment before pulling her chin up so that I could see her face and sobering. "Your parents, your life, made you who you are. If you'd had someone like Carlisle for a father instead of Charlie, you wouldn't have grown up to be the woman I fell in love with and then we would not exist. And for that, I am grateful for your parents, no matter how screwed up you think them to be."

"I guess," she mumbled.

"As for the way your parents raised you, I'm not going to touch the subject of your mum because I think she's a few Skittles short of a rainbow-"

Bella burst out laughing.

I raised my eyebrows. "Is that a laugh?" She nodded, still laughing. "Good. Now, your mother aside, I think Charlie is an excellent father. He's been the one person you've been able to count on all your life. He's given you the room you needed to grow into who you are, when most parents would suffocate their children trying to protect them. He may not be affectionate, but there is no doubt in my mind that that man would give his life for you without a second thought."

"You know all this from just a weekend with him?" she asked incredulously.

I nodded. "I know all this because he and I are much the same when it comes to you. Our love may not be the same, but we both love you with every part of our beings. To imagine a world without you is impossible. For both of us. Only he views it as a father, not as your..." I trailed off, unsure what to call myself.

"Ooh, let's get hokey. Soul mate."

I chuckled. "All right."

She stood up on her toes and pulled my face down to hers so that our noses were touching. "I love you, Edward."

I grinned crookedly at her. "Feel better now?"

"Much. Thank you."

I took her hand in mine and led her back into the kitchen, only to have her snatched out of my grasp by Esme. She took Bella into her arms with an excited shout and held her so tightly against her, I was surprised not to see Bella's eyes bulging from lack of oxygen.

"Mum! Don't choke her!" I laughed. I managed to pry them apart and held Bella against me. "I'm rather attached to her, you know."

Esme smiled sheepishly. "Apologies. I tend to get a little carried away," she said to Bella. "You're the first girl he's ever had meet us."

Bella's eyes widened. "You...But..." She stared up at me. "I don't understand. You've been in relationships before."

Esme answered for me. "He may have been in other relationships, but he's never been in love until he found you."

I felt my cheeks heating up, and I finally knew what Bella felt like when she was embarrassed. "Mother," I warned.

She shrugged her shoulders and gave me an unapologetic smile. "Do you have another explanation for never bringing any of those actresses home to England to meet the parents? Or that not a single one of them knew that you even _had_ a family?"

"I was protecting you," I hedged.

"Not the only reason, dear. But I'll let it pass. This time."

I fought with the smile that her words elicited from me only to fail miserably. Holding Bella close, I watched the woman who was virtually a watered-down version of my mother make herself at home. She laughed with Jasper, she doted on Alice, she teased Carlisle. She had a way of making home be wherever we were, and she made you feel like you were an intrinsic part of her world with nothing more than a simple 'hello'.

I loved her as much as I loved my mother.

At times, the physical similarities Esme shared with my mother felt like a dagger to my heart, especially around the anniversary of my parents' death. But she never let it bother her, instead embraced the fact that her tall body was graceful and feminine like my mother's, and that her face was that of her sister's. She let me grieve in silence those first few years and never made me feel guilty for that part of me that harbored hatred for the simple fact that she was still breathing while Elizabeth was not. After a while, I moved past it enough to focus on the differences between them instead of focusing on the similarities. Esme's hair was a muted version of mine. She kept it shorter than my mother did, and its caramel color was not as striking against her skin as the deep, coppery brown color that Elizabeth's was on her. Her eyes weren't the same deep, piercing jade as mine, but instead were the light green of meadows. I eventually realized it was a blessing that I had her after my parents' death, and that I hadn't lost her as well.

Watching Bella with my parents made me something in me rejoice with the knowledge that I'd finally found someone I was willing to share my life with.

Esme came over to me to wrap her arm around my waist while Bella checked the chicken in the oven. "She's incredible," she breathed.

"I know."

"She reminds me so much of Elizabeth," she said with a wistful tone.

"Really?" I asked, amazed.

"Oh, yes. Lizzie had this way about her. She was nurturing and funny, yet fiercely independent and strong. Bella has a bit of growing up left to do, but she's going to be an amazing woman."

I sifted through the memories left of my mother and realized she was right. I couldn't remember things with perfect clarity, but there was no denying that Bella was much like my mother had been. "I never noticed."

"No?" I shook my head. "Your mother would have loved her."

A jolt went through me with the words. I wasn't sure why, but that meant more to me than I could ever have imagined.


	16. Chapter 16

**Thanks for the reviews, as always...**

**Thanks to Kaylinas and Amylily123 for being my Britspeak proofreaders and thanks to Stratan for beta'ing this...yes, you heard it right, I've got me a beta now, LOL. **

**I've signed a petition, that is surely to be my demise, stating that FF needs to stop pulling popular stories and come up with a better rating system. I've had 4 of my faves pulled so far and am waiting for my entire list to go. I've been accosted by many people in the last few days and finally succumbed to the pressure (hehe)...Petition is on Shortbritches85 profile if you want in.**

**That being said, I'm going to start working on getting everything transferred over to Twilighted and may put up a blog--JUST IN CASE. I'm slowly but surely getting Defying Gravity up, and once I hear back from the lovely readergoof who's doing my banners, I'll start a rotation of posting everything over there (even if Twilighted is not my fave). More details when I get them as well as links on my profile. I'll keep posting on here (as is--lemons and all) until something happens. Then everything will be edited to a PG-13 version here, and I'll have the full lemony versions over there.**

**OK, now I'm done...not much happenin' in the chapter. Getting from point a to point b. **

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* * *

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Chapter 16

**Edward**

Dinner was fantastic. Bella made a rosemary chicken that was phenomenal, and that chocolate cake literally melted in your mouth. Esme was so impressed, she asked for the recipe--which from my mother is the highest compliment there is.

Carlisle, Esme, Alice, and Jasper all got to know a little more about Bella during dinner, and I knew she couldn't have been more proud of the way she handled herself. She was witty and friendly, endearing all of them with her occasional blush, and managed to keep her nerves buried down.

Not a single curse word left her mouth.

When my family wasn't asking Bella about her family, school, and life in general, we filled the silence with good-natured jokes. With the way Jasper was shoveling food into his mouth, I had to mention something about his backwoods upbringing, which then prompted him to say something about being a spoiled rich boy.

After dinner, Bella and I cleaned up the kitchen while my family got their presents out of their suitcases and took them to the tree in the living room. We brought them some sort of hot apple pie drink that Bella made and sat around, letting the alcohol loosen us up before we exchanged gifts. It was the first time in my life since my parent's death that I didn't feel like something was missing at Christmas. I still missed them dearly--I always did this time of year--but again, Bella had managed to fill whatever hole I had inside me. It was unbelievable to me that one person could completely change your life--and keep changing it. Every time I thought that there was no way to love her any more, she would do or say something that proved me wrong. In this case, it was by simply being here with me.

"They're all so pretty," Bella whispered to me as she looked around the room. "I feel like the ugly duckling."

"Well, you are a swan," I teased.

"Yeah, well this swan's not going to suddenly grow up to be beautiful. I'm already grown and still, nothing," she retorted.

"Stop being ridiculous."

"You try being in a room full of models and see how you like it," she hissed. "Oh, wait. You've been gorgeous your whole life and wouldn't know what it felt like to be normal."

Where did this sudden insecurity come from?

I grabbed her face and forced her to look at me. "They're just looks. They're not important. And if you don't think that you are just as beautiful as Esme and Alice, you are in serious need of a good long look in the mirror."

She glared at me for a moment and then took a deep breath. "Sorry. I'm nervous, and I'm lashing out at you."

"You've nothing to be nervous about. My family loves you."

She gave me a disbelieving look, but I shrugged it off. Esme and Carlisle had been completely captivated by Bella from the moment they walked in the door, even more so during dinner. And Alice had loved her since the day of her interview. Bella was being completely irrational.

Alice pranced around as she handed everyone their gifts--the alcohol making her even giddier and more cheerful than usual--and I had to bite back the laugh at her behavior.

"What did you put in this?" I asked Bella softly while Alice was across the room.

She frowned as she thought about it. "Apple juice, apple cider, cinnamon, sugar, Everclear-"

"Everclear?" I repeated in shock. "Whatever for?"

"It's in the recipe," she replied in confusion.

"It explains it," I muttered.

"Explains what?"

"Alice. She must have drunk the entire thing because she's already pissed."

Bella watched Alice more closely and laughed--loudly--causing everyone to look over at her curiously. "Sorry." She held out her mug. "I forgot to tell you that you should be careful with this stuff. It's got a bite. As Alice has already found out."

Alice either ignored Bella's remark or didn't hear it since she seemed to be searching for something. She looked around the room, and then darted over to the tree with a puzzled expression. "Where's my gift?"

"You already got mine," I said lightly.

"Not yours, you git. The one from Jasper."

"I didn't bring your gift," Jasper drawled.

"Why not?" she screeched.

"Because I wanted to surprise you," he responded coolly.

She was close to tears. "Surprise me with what? I've been with you the entire time. You didn't _do_ anything!"

He slowly put down his mug and stood up, like he wasn't in danger of being slapped by my sister. He calmly walked over to her, and then shocked everyone by dropping down to one knee.

"Marry me," he said simply.

Esme gasped audibly from her seat.

Alice stared down at him in bewilderment. "What?"

He laughed softly at her reaction. "Marry me. I didn't buy you a ring, I didn't ask your father for his permission-" He glanced at Carlisle. "Even though I normally would've, because I didn't want you to know my intentions before I had the chance to ask you. So Mary Alice Cullen, will you do me the honor of being my wife?"

Jasper's words must have finally registered, because she let out a scream so loud, all of us were covering our ears and cowering into the furniture. "Yes! Yes!" she giggled as she jumped up and down happily.

Jasper stood up and kissed the tip of her nose before he pulled her into his arms. "Thank you, baby," he said quietly.

"Did you plan this?" she asked when she finally calmed down.

"Hell no," he said with a chuckle. "I've wanted to ask you for a month, but I didn't know how to without you figurin' out what I was doing. I wanted to take you somewhere special, but I knew you'd be suspicious enough to see what I had planned. I didn't want to call Carlisle and ask for your hand, because I didn't want you to randomly see the phone call. I thought it would be best to just spring it on ya. That's why I have no ring."

"But you said you left my gift." She was still confused.

"I forgot it back home," he said sheepishly. "But isn't this better?"

She nodded. "Better than that fabulous Louis bag you got me any day."

He grinned. "See? Exactly why I didn't buy you a ring. I can't surprise you with anything. Do you know how hard it is to have a girlfriend who's psychic?" He kissed her gently. "But you'll get one. No fiancée of mine is gonna go without a big ol' rock on her finger. I want everyone to know you're mine."

I had to hand it to him. It was the perfect way to ask my sister to marry him. In all honesty, the only way to ask her--unless he wanted her to shout yes before he even asked the question.

"You'd better not ask me to marry you like that."

I was on the verge of getting up and joining Carlisle and Esme to offer my congratulations to Alice and Jasper, so I was a little taken aback by Bella's statement. "I'm sorry?"

"Don't ask me to marry you like that," she repeated. I looked over to see her smirking. "Because if I'm telling your ass no, I want to do it in private. And this," she waved her hand in the air, "makes me obligated to say yes. I don't like that."

I laughed and pinched her hip. "Not funny, love."

"But you're laughing."

"You guys are talking about getting married?" Jasper asked us.

Bella's face flushed red as she glanced my way. I looked past Jasper to see my family's curious eyes on us. So I decided to make light of the situation and not take away from Alice's moment.

"I might've mentioned it. Only because I've no intention of actually following through with it," I joked. "Bella's..." I pretended to think. "Well, for lack of a better word obnoxious. I'm eagerly awaiting the day she finally finds another job."

Bella smacked my chest. "Fine then. I'm leaving." She smiled at my family. "It was nice meeting you."

She got up to leave, but I pulled her into my lap. "Oh, no you don't. You're not getting off that easy."

She giggled as she fell against me. "Jerk."

"Be serious, Edward," Esme said with a frown. "Are you talking marriage?"

I exhaled sharply and ran my free hand through my hair. "It's more of an assumption, I suppose."

Alice squealed and rushed over to us. "We should have a double wedding!" she exclaimed. "At the Kent house."

"What?" Bella barked out in fear. "No."

"Alice, for God's sake. I've not even proposed. One thing at a time, please," I cried in exasperation.

"But you... Why haven't you proposed? I know I saw you get the ring out..." She stared at Bella's naked hand questioningly. "Where's the bloody ring? Why didn't I see that she didn't have it on earlier?"

Bella seemed extremely uncomfortable. "Um, because you were still in shock from seeing me naked?" She moved her head towards mine and mumbled so that her mouth barely moved. "Edward, what ring? What's she talking about?"

My eyes flashed with anger and I gritted my teeth against the harsh words that threatened to spill out of my mouth. Bella had no idea a ring even existed. Until now. "I've not proposed because we've only _actually_ been together for a month. I'm sorry if I'm in no hurry to rush Bella to the altar."

"But-"

I stopped her. "Bugger off. Don't ruin it before I even ask the question." I took a breath and smiled. "Let's just focus on you, shall we?"

She beamed at me, the conversation miraculously forgotten. "I'm getting married."

"That you are, darlin'. Congratulations," I said warmly.

She did a little curtsy. "Thank you."

"What ring?" Bella repeated.

"No ring," I said evasively. "She must've gotten the timing wrong."

"Oh."

The excitement of Jasper's proposal died down, the conversation about Bella and I had been disregarded as everyone went back to their previous seats. We started opening gifts, and Bella leaned over to kiss my cheek. "She didn't ruin it, I promise."

"If you say so..."

She grinned. "I have no idea if or when you'll do it, so don't worry. She definitely didn't ruin it."

I tucked her hair behind her ear, brushing my thumb along her cheekbone as I did. "There's never been the question of if. It's merely the question of when."

"Yeah?" she asked, biting on her lip nervously.

I let one side of my mouth turn up and coaxed her lip out from between her teeth gently with my index finger. "You know this. Now open your gifts so I can watch you squirm under everyone's stare."

She looked like she wanted to say something back, but kept quiet.

Bella opened the candles and the new messenger bag that she'd been given, and then warily picked up the last of her gifts, a small box. She ripped into the paper and held the black box in her shaking hand. She glanced over at me and chewed on her lip again.

"Open it," I encouraged.

She lifted the lid and nearly choked as she snapped it closed again. I'd barely gotten a glance at the diamond cluster earrings I'd loved so much at Harry Winston. "I can't... I...," she stammered, closing her eyes and shaking her head.

Esme laughed. "Of course you can, dear. Edward mentioned that he wanted to buy those for you, but you made an arrangement with him that prevented him from doing so. We thought we'd buy them instead. For the ball."

"It's too much," she breathed. "My gifts suck compare to this."

Carlisle chuckled. "That's not true. Edward must have told you that I like to read and have always kept a journal. I promise you, the leather journal you gave me will be put to good use."

She let out a resigned breath and opened the box again. "Well, at least I know where Edward gets his generosity. I've always wanted to know if it was an inherited trait, or if he picked it up from you all."

Carlisle shook his head. "We've learned from Edward. Since the day he started acting, he's always given part of his earnings to charity."

"Dad," I mumbled, shifting uncomfortably.

"What?" he asked with a sly grin. "Just because you give anonymously does not mean we don't all know you do it." He turned back to Bella. "My son gives away millions. More than I could ever imagine each and every year. His actions inspire us to be better people because no matter how successful he's become, he knows what's important in life. And it's not the money he earns."

Bella's eyes were wide when she looked over to me. I could feel the heat of my cheeks and realized I'd been more embarrassed since my parent's arrival than I had in years. "What do you give to?"

"Erm, various orphanages and charities that help give couples adoption grants. Things of that nature," I said quietly.

"Because you're technically an orphan yourself."

I cleared my throat. "Yes."

Something passed between us while she kept her intense gaze on me. Suddenly, she broke the silence. "I'm sorry, ignore me," she said loudly before speaking only to me. "I have to fucking kiss you."

She got up to her knees and threaded her fingers through my hair, bringing my face to hers and giving me a passionate kiss. A moan escaped my throat as I brought my hands up to cup her face while she continued to literally kiss me blind.

She pulled back, licking her lips while a tear fell down her cheek. "You are so much more than anything I could have imagined when I took this job. I never imagined you would be this _good_."

I chuckled and gathered her tear with my thumb. "What did you think I'd be like?"

"Cocky and conceited," she said sheepishly.

"Ah," I said with a crooked grin. "I'm most definitely not that."

She smiled back. "No. I love you."

"And I love you." I snuck a glance at my family, who were all doing as Bella asked and studiously ignoring us. "I think we should get back to the task at hand before my family gets bored and breaks us apart. More specifically, Alice."

"I heard that, Edward!" Alice yelled at me.

"You can yell about it, but you can't deny it, you nosy little troll," I retorted.

Bella and I cleaned up the area around us, and Bella eventually managed to genuinely thank everyone for her gifts. Alice made her try the earrings on before she took them to the bedroom, and I had to admit, they were even better on her than I'd pictured.

Bella came over and held out the earrings to me. "Put them in your safe. I don't want anything to happen to them. Ever."

"All right," I smirked.

"Bella!" Alice chirped. "Mum and I want some more of that apple drink. Show us where it is?"

Bella nodded and was quickly led out of the room by Alice.

"You are aware you're not gettin' her back until the end of the night," Jasper said with a grin.

I heard laughter floating from the kitchen and felt my lips quirk. "I suppose not. What shall we do to pass the time?"

"I'll help with the trash if you play a game of pool with me."

I groaned inwardly. "You know how I hate to play..."

"I'm the guest, damn it. Besides, I'm sure your dad would like to do some father-son bonding time, too." Jasper threw Carlisle a wink and got a chuckle in response.

"Which son is he bonding to?" I asked.

"Me, you moron," Jasper quipped. "Let's go."

We went into the game room, and I went to the bar to get us all a bottle of water while Jasper racked the balls. As a general rule, I didn't drink much, but if I did, I tried to make sure I drank a bottle of water for every alcoholic drink I consumed. Bella like to tease my habit by calling me a control freak, but it was no matter. I'd rather look like a control freak than be dehydrated.

"Bella's great," Jasper commented as he took his shot.

"Thank you," I replied sincerely.

"I hope I didn't ruin anything by proposin'," he said casually.

"No, you didn't ruin anything. I actually hadn't put much thought into how I'll do it. Or even _when._"

Carlisle took a sip of his water and stared at me intensely. "You're positive you want to marry her."

I cocked my head to the side. "I thought you liked her."

He smiled. "Oh, I do. Very much. But there are many things to consider about being with someone so young. Or your employee, for that matter."

"I've already given it a lot of thought, Dad. We've kept our relationship secret but have talked about coming out, so to speak. I know it will be hard. For both of us. We'll have the newness of the relationship feeding the frenzy, as well as the age difference and the fact that she started out as my assistant. But Bella's strong and one of the most determined people I've ever known. If she's sure about this--about us--nothing they do or say is going to change her mind. She'll just need to... adjust. That's the part that makes me nervous."

"How so?" he inquired.

"She's basically had to grow up on her own. Her mother's unreliable, and her father lives near Seattle. She's spent her entire life focusing on her education, because it's safe. Now that there's more to her life than school and the occasional get together with her friends, her basic instinct reaction is fear and panic. She has a tendency to pull away. I'm afraid that if it's too much for her, she'll pull away completely."

"Break up with you?" Jasper asked incredulously.

"Precisely. Whether we're still only labeled as boyfriend and girlfriend or whether she's my wife. I have this sick feeling she's going to run."

Jasper shook his head adamantly. "Not happenin', son. That girl loves you. Like, the world revolves around you, loves you. Nothing those assholes in the press say is gonna to make her leave you. It'd have to be something really bad for that to happen."

"I agree," Carlisle interjected.

This had me smiling absurdly. The fact that everyone could see how much we meant to each other made me extremely pleased. "And what do you consider really bad?"

"I don't know. I'm not the one thinking she's gonna leave. But my guess is something like you cheatin' on her would do it."

"That'll never happen," I said fiercely.

He twirled his pool stick in his hands. "No, I guess it wouldn't. You're about like me when it comes to relationships. You're in it to win it."

I chuckled at his words. "Has Alice mentioned anything to you?"

He shook his head. "Not a word."

I nodded and took my shot, missing widely. "Jesus, I hate this game," I muttered.

"If you hate it so much, then why the hell do you have a pool table?"

I shrugged one shoulder. "It came with the house. I didn't know what else to do with the space," I said honestly.

"Jasper? How're things in the Army?" Carlisle questioned.

"Great. I just got a promotion."

"Oh?" Carlisle smiled widely.

"Yep. First Sergeant. The ceremony's in a couple of weeks."

I arched my brow. "A promotion and a proposal. You've been quite busy, Jasper. Anything else you'd like to announce while you're here?"

He rolled his eyes. "Not that I'm aware of."

"Good thing," I deadpanned. "Because you might not make it back home." I'd murder him if he got Alice pregnant before marrying her.

He snorted. "Save the overprotective brother shit for someone whose ass you can actually kick." He grinned smugly at me. "Your turn."

* * *

**Bella**

Shopping.

Shopping with my boyfriend's overactive sister and his mother.

Not my idea of fun.

Well, that wasn't totally true. In the last couple of days, I'd grown to really like Alice. She was smart, funny, and very sweet. She had this innate ability to pull you out of a foul mood with a single smile. Not to mention how hilarious some of her more psychic moments were. Like the face she made earlier at the movie theater when she realized she was going to be sitting behind the largest man there.

Obviously, we avoided that specific seat so that she could actually _see_ the movie.

I followed Alice down the sidewalk, watching her with a smile working at my mouth. I glanced over to Esme to see the same expression on her face.

So maybe shopping with them was a little fun.

Alice was like a dog sniffing something out. She had this intense look of concentration on her face as we walked from store to store. She let herself be led by some unseen force, either skipping a store entirely or walking to the door, only to spin around with a look of disgust and walk to the next store.

"Is she always like this?" I whispered to Esme.

"No. Only when she's put pressure on herself. Otherwise, she doesn't try to..." She pursed her lips as she thought for the right word. "Search for something. She's like any normal girl and tries on whatever she fancies. She wants your evening with Edward to be perfect."

"But I'm not actually going to be able to spend time with him there. At this point, I'm not even sure why I agreed to it. I'd rather sit around and wait for him to get home."

"You don't like Jacob?" she questioned.

"No, I do. We get along great. I'm wondering how not to make the evening end in disaster. There are so many things that could go wrong for Edward just by me being there."

Alice heard the last of my sentence and turned around. "Don't walk the press line with Jacob."

"Huh?"

"You can arrive with Jacob, but enter the building separately. The press will start linking you to Jacob, otherwise," she said before she turned back around. "Then not only will Edward have to extricate himself from the Tanya situation, but you'll be in the same position."

"Oh, I didn't think about that." I frowned.

"This is it," Alice exclaimed, grabbing my hand and dragging me into the store.

My eyes widened as soon as I walked in and my body locked up--frozen in fear of destroying something in this obscenely expensive store. Esme nudged me forward, and I numbly followed Alice as she went from dress to dress until I nearly fell on top of her when she stopped suddenly.

She pulled out a white billowing dress and flagged down the salesgirl. "This. In a size two."

"I wear a four," I corrected her.

"No, you'll need a two," she responded flippantly. "You're thinner than you used to be." She smirked at me. "Must be all that sex."

I blushed a tomato red and glanced over at Esme. "Alice," I hissed.

She shrugged unrepentantly. "What? I'm merely stating the truth. Let's not dwell on it though. I'm already nauseated with the thought."

I went back into the fitting room and fought with the dress. There were yards upon yards of white gossamer fabric and more straps than I had arms.

"Alice," I squeaked out.

She laughed. "Open the door. I'll help you into it."

She had me in the dress in a matter of seconds and led me to a row of mirrors. I stood up on the platform and finally looked at my reflection. The dress didn't have a shape, but it still managed to fit my body perfectly. A thin strap went over my shoulder, while a twisted strap draped over my bicep. The other side had a silvery-colored strap that split and went back into two twisted sections. I always shied away from white because I'm so pale, but I loved everything about this.

"Bella, you look wonderful," Esme said through her tears.

I craned my neck to see her wiping her eyes and giggled. "You're crying?"

She nodded. "I can't help it."

I stepped down and to my surprise, took her in a hug. She had managed to make me feel like a part of her family already. "I take it this is a winner then?"

She nodded against me. "You'd be a fool not to get it."

There was a commotion outside, pulling our attention away from each other. I looked back toward the entrance as none other than Tanya Denali came strutting through a crowd of photographers and into the store. She pulled off her massive sunglasses and ran a hand through her loosely curled strawberry blond hair as she looked around. She spotted me and smiled slowly.

I hated this woman. Not only was she tall and gorgeous, she was a bitch to boot.

"Shit," I whispered, glancing at Alice who was giving me something like an 'Oh shit' look herself.

"Hello. It's Bella, right?" Tanya said politely.

I nodded and forced a smile. "Tanya. It's nice to see you again."

Her eyes went over my dress speculatively. "Where are you going all dressed up?"

"The Black and White Ball," I said nonchalantly.

Her perfect eyebrows shot up and she grinned wickedly. "Is that so? Who's the lucky guy?"

"No one."

Her smile faded with my answer. "So secretive," she said disapprovingly. "I do like it though. The dress, that is."

"Thank you."

Alice took a step toward me. "Don't think about it. Bella will look better than you and then you'll be forced into one of those pesky little 'Who Wore It Best?" votes with nameless woman. And you'll lose."

Tanya's lip curled back a little with the thought. "And who might you be?"

"Just a family friend," I interjected. "This is Alice and Esme Cullen. They're spending some time in LA with me for the holidays."

"Lovely to meet you," Esme said sweetly. I could see the dislike for Tanya clearly in her eyes, despite her pleasant demeanor.

Tanya inclined her head. "Nice to meet you. Well, I suppose I'd better get to it. I've got my last fitting for the dress I'm wearing Thursday." She gave me that stupid wicked grin again. "Edward and I are going to look amazing together."

My hands involuntarily curled into fists at my sides. Esme reached over and squeezed one of them comfortingly. "I thought you didn't care for Edward."

"He's not typically my type, no," she admitted. "And sometimes he can be so self-righteous and boring. But the man is gorgeous, am I right?" There was more to her tone than what she was saying. If I didn't know any better, I'd think it was some sort of challenge.

Edward was nowhere near self-righteous and boring, but I couldn't focus on that part because I had to concentrate on not blackening her pretty blue eyes.

Instead, I gave her a tight smile. "I'll see you Thursday, Tanya," I said before I went back into the dressing room.

Angry tears filled my eyes as I quickly changed back into my jeans and sweater. I took a deep breath as I hung the gown back up and silently went over to the cash register.

I paid with Edward's credit card, because there was no way I could afford a dress that expensive unless I relinquished two months of pay. Alice had already picked out shoes and some silver bangles, and Esme had bought them as another one of her gifts.

I didn't even bother to argue or protest in any way. I just wanted to get out of there before I screamed or caused a scene. I wanted Edward as far away from that bitch as possible before she tried something she lived to regret. As soon as the ball was over, I was pushing for Edward to 'break up' with her.

We pushed our way through the crowd that had gathered outside and headed back to where I'd parked my Audi. There were a few flashes of lights as we moved past them, but soon they all realized we were nobodies and went back to waiting for Tanya again.

As soon as we were out of ear shot of any of the photographers, Esme and Alice started ranting about Tanya.

"That woman was horrible," Esme cried. "I'm going straight to Edward when we get back and telling him how utterly stupid I think he is for letting the world even _think_ he could like her."

"How can he stand to be around her for even a minute?" Alice asked. "She thought she was the hottest thing since sliced bread."

I laughed at her. "Jasper?"

"He tends to rub off on you," she said with a sheepish smile.

I nodded in agreement. "I'll be telling people they're fucking cats for months." I slapped my hand over my mouth as soon as I realized I'd cursed in front of Esme. "Excuse me, I'm sorry."

Esme waved me off. "Edward said your language could be a little coarse. I'm only surprised it took me this long to witness it firsthand."

"I shouldn't curse so much, but good God, it's a hard habit to break," I admitted.

"What made you start to begin with?"

I was silent as I thought about it. "I have no idea," I said in wonder. "I don't even remember when I started doing it. It wasn't until I met Edward that I realized how bad I really am about it."

We got into the car with Alice guarding the dress in the backseat and drove back to Edward's. True to her word, Esme sat her purse down on the counter and went straight to the study to talk to him.

I imagined Edward's face as Esme reprimanded him and laughed to myself.

Alice stopped at the counter and cocked her head as she got a faraway look in her eyes. In only seconds, she snapped out of it and grabbed the thick envelope that was lying in front of her and handed it to me.

"What's this?"

"A script," she replied, getting some juice out of the refrigerator.

My brows knit. "Why do I need it? I don't act. Come to think of it, nobody needs it around here anymore."

"Read it," she demanded.

My frown grew deeper.

"Don't think about it, Bella. Just do it. And then you'll know why."

* * *

I waited until Edward was asleep and then slipped out of bed and into the study so that I could start on the script. I read for hours, not stopping until I'd finished the last page. It wasn't as if I wanted to stay up all night reading. I literally could _not_ put the script down. It was unlike anything I'd ever read before. Clever, funny, heartbreaking, and full of potential.

There was no doubt in my mind. Edward had to do it.

I wanted him to retire. I wanted to be able to see him on a daily basis and not have weeks of separation while he filmed or traveled around the world promoting those films, but I couldn't let him pass this up. I knew that by him agreeing to do this movie, it would change everything. The peaceful life we'd dreamed of would no longer be in sight and might never again be if things went well for him, but I had to believe that it would be worth it. Alice must have seen something, the possibility of him winning another Oscar or something equally great. He was willing to give so much up for me, I could sacrifice something of my own for his happiness as well.

Edward cleared his throat from the doorway, blinking against the harsh light and pushing his hair back away from his forehead. Of course the damn dog was right at his heels. "What are you doing down here?" he asked thickly.

I took a deep breath before speaking. "Deciding that you can't retire."

He stood still for a moment and then pulled himself out of his stupor. "I don't understand," he said slowly. "I thought this was what you wanted. What _we_ wanted."

"It was. It is. But something's come up."

He opened his mouth and then quickly shut it again. He crossed the room and crouched down in front of me. "What on earth could change my mind?"

I reached out and took the script in my hands. "This came for you today."

"Who sent it?" he asked in confusion.

I shrugged. "The return address was Royce's agency. I'm assuming you're working with them until you've finished with _Rouge_?"

"I said they could continue with publicity bookings and things like that, but I didn't tell them I was looking to do another film." His eyes flickered from my face to the script. "You read this?"

I nodded. "It was amazing, Edward. You have to do it."

"I don't think so," he said quickly.

"Edward. Listen to me. Alice saw something today, and then told me to read it. Now I know why. It was meant for you, as fucking cheesy as that sounds."

"It does sound a bit cheesy," he said with a grin.

"Read it? Please?" I pleaded.

He let out his breath loudly. "All right," he conceded reluctantly. "I'll read it."

I beamed at him. "Good. I promise, you'll know exactly what I mean when you do."

"We'll see." He thumbed the corner of the script a few times before speaking again. "What if I decide to take this role? I know you say you want me to, but are you aware of how much this could change things? I can't lose you over something as trivial as this. You... you're everything to me now. Nothing matters without you."

I let my fingers trace over the coppery stubble of his jaw. "I know it will. And I'm okay with that. At least I'm pretty sure I will be." He eyed me suspiciously. "Look, I don't know what it's like to be hounded by photographers, I don't know what it's like not to have any privacy yet. But you are willing to give up so much for me. And like you said, you've not asked for anything in return. I can give you this, if you decide to do it. You can be with me and continue to do what you love, for as long as you want. We can figure this out. You don't have to rearrange your entire life to be with me." I felt a twinge of sadness saying this, remembering what it was like to have him gone for six weeks, but pushed it away. After all, it was called sacrifice for a reason.

"Bella, I honestly don't want to continue working. I want to be with you, start a family. I want to see our children grow up. I don't want to miss something important because I'm overseas promoting my latest movie. _Rogue_ was supposed to be my last obligation. But to hear you tell it, this will be my last." One side of his mouth lifted in a rueful smile.

"You want to retire? I mean really, really want to retire?"

"Yes," he laughed.

"Thank God. I want you to do this, but I don't want to spend my life wishing you were home with me," I admitted.

He gave me an affectionate look. "You can be so silly at times. Are we in agreement? I'll read the script, and if I decide to take the role, then I'll retire after its release?"

"Yes."

"And if I take this role, you'll do something in return?"

I stared at him warily. "That depends."

He chuckled. "I want you to go to graduate school. No more of this indecisive nonsense. You want to; you're simply being stubborn and refusing."

My mouth popped open indignantly. "I'm not being stubborn," I protested.

"No?" he asked, lifting his brows. "Then why haven't you turned in that application? It's already filled out; you have the means to go. But you don't want to take my money."

"That's not all," I said, biting down on my lip and looking away from him.

"It's the main reason. But if you're my wife, it becomes a moot point." My eyes snapped to his in shock. "I suppose I'll just have to make good on that proposal I argued with Alice about on Christmas." His eyes flashed with humor, and he changed the subject. "Now, come to bed. I only have two more days before you go back home. I want to have you in my arms as much as possible."

"I'll be back," I giggled.

"But it won't be the same."


	17. Chapter 17

**Thanks for the reviews!**

**Thanks to Kaylinas for checking this out again and the nice chat about biscuits, LOL**

**Thanks to Stratan for beta'ing this**

**So if you're reading Between the Sun and the Moon, just know I've got a little over 3,000 words written for the next chapter. I'm trying not to let the cliffy hang for too long.**

**This is the last chapter Edward's family has an active role in for a while, but they'll be back. Coming up next is the ball...which I'm sure makes some of you very excited since the drama starts to unfold soon.**

**LEMON to begin with, because I was bored and stuck it in :)**

* * *

Chapter 17

**Bella**

I awoke to an intense yearning, boiling my blood and flaming the fire in the pit of my stomach. Heat consumed me as the sensation of feathery touches and whispers of kisses surrounded me.

I opened my eyes and saw it was still dark outside. Moonlight spilled in the tall windows and illuminated Edward's room enough that I could see everything with perfect clarity. If I could have focused, that is.

My mind was hazy, trapped beneath the thick blanket of sleep and desire. I felt Edward shift in between my legs and finally looked down, immediately meeting his penetrating gaze. A soft moan came from deep in my chest as he continued to watch me, his eyes boring into mine and communicating wordlessly with me.

A sinful grin crossed his features. "I could stare at you all night."

Sparks flew throughout my body at the sound of his silken voice. So seductive and smooth, even when he was angry, he could make desire unfurl and radiate through me with just a word. If someone would have told me before I met Edward that it was possible, I wouldn't have been able to believe it. But now that I'd experienced it, anything less seemed to be the impossible.

His hand made its way down to where I was hot and aching. I arched my back and hissed through my teeth as his fingers connected with my wet flesh.

"Fuck," I moaned.

"I want you," he said raggedly. "Again. You'll be in your flat this time tomorrow."

"Take me," I gasped back as his fingers plunged inside me.

His fingers left my body, making me frown, and moved to my hips. Rolling me over so that I was straddling him, he slowly lowered me down on him. My head fell back as he filled me; pleasure shot through me and turned me into a quivering mess of need.

His hands reached up to cup my breast; his fingers toyed with my nipples. "You're so beautiful like this," he murmured as I began sinuously moving up and down on him.

I was quickly losing myself to him, but I somehow fought to open my eyes and look down at him. The look of rapture, the piercing emotion that was so evident in his stare took my breath away.

Desperate now to feel his body against mine, I leaned down and captured his lips with mine. The feel of his tongue against mine, the hot scent of him surrounding me, matched with the friction his skin caused on mine made me spiral out of control.

Without warning, I cried out from the force of my orgasm slamming through me and buried my face into the crook of Edward's neck so that I wouldn't get too loud and wake his family.

He groaned in my ear, thrusting his hips up and driving deeper inside me. Whispering words of I love you, he held me still and pulsed inside me as he climaxed, and I collapsed on top of him, limbs limp and now completely sated and exhausted.

* * *

Morning came sooner than I would have liked. I didn't want to leave this little bubble we'd been trapped inside for the last two weeks and get back to reality. The reality of his career, my job working for him, and school-the reality of going home and facing Rosalie for the first time since she'd left for her parent's house.

"God fucking damn it," I groaned into my pillow.

Edward chuckled and ran his hand over my back. "What seems to be the problem, love?"

"I have to go home," I whined. "I don't want to go home. I want to stay here." I blushed with the admission, but my face was buried in the pillow, so Edward was unaware of it.

"I don't want you to go either," he sighed. "But we have lives outside of one another. Responsibilities. We can't ignore all that simply because we fell in love."

"Why not?" I pouted.

"Because it would be irresponsible of me to let you fail your last semester before you graduate. And unwise for you to do so," he responded rationally.

"Fine. Be that way."

He laughed once and pulled me against him. "We still have one more day before reality sets in. My family is leaving this afternoon, and then we're free to be alone for a few hours. And who knows? Maybe we'll wake up to Mum spoiling us with breakfast."

I peeked up at him. "That sounds pretty good, actually."

He chuckled and smacked my ass. "Come on. Let's get a shower. I know I'm all dirty after all that activity last night."

I giggled and shook my head. "You're such a dork."

"Would you rather me tell you that I'd like to fuck you one last time before you go?"

I bit back an indecent moan with his words. Hearing him talk like that was always so hot.

He smirked; I hadn't fooled him at all. "I don't think I need to ask twice, do I?"

"No," I answered immediately.

We took the longest shower of my life, unable to keep our hands off of one another long enough to actually get cleaned up. Finally, the water had run cold, so we decided to get out.

We dressed and came downstairs, hand in hand, to let the dog out. He barreled past me, knocking me down in the process. Of course I cursed loudly as I fell and heard Alice's laughter from the other room.

"Watch out for the dog, Bella!" she chirped.

Edward started down at me with his face turned down unhappily. "The two of you really don't get along, do you?"

"Um, no shit, Sherlock," I snapped back sarcastically.

Edward's brows shot up. "Someone's rather touchy this morning."

I let him help me up, even though I was glaring at him. "Sorry. Your dog pisses me off."

He pursed his lips a little. "He's really quite charming. You merely need to give him a chance."

I shook my head obstinately. "When hell freezes over. That dog... that dog knows I'm invading his territory. Our relationship is that of mutual hate. Get over it."

"I don't think he hates you," he commented as he led me into the kitchen.

I snorted, but didn't comment.

Just as Edward said, Esme was cooking a huge breakfast for everyone. "Holy crapballs!" I exclaimed happily. My stomach snarled from the smells that were coming from the stove.

Esme turned around and smiled warmly. "I thought we'd eat together before we go."

"Breakfast without me having to cook or go anywhere for it. I think I could get used to this," I joked.

She laughed. "Well, then, sit down. Would you like some orange juice? I'm making tea for later if you'd rather have that."

I glanced up at Edward guiltily. "No thanks, I can get it myself."

Esme started toward the refrigerator anyway. "No, Mum. I'll do it," Edward told her, moving in between her and the refrigerator. "You've done enough already." He smiled broadly and kissed her hair.

"So what all are you making?" I asked Esme, trying to make conversation.

"A full breakfast," she replied, turning what looked like sausage in a pan.

"Which is?"

Edward peered over Esme's shoulder. "Eggs, bacon, sausage, hash browns, baked beans, toast." His face lit up with his boyish smile. "And black pudding."

_Baked beans for breakfast? What the fuck?_

"There's tomato on the counter over there," Esme said to us.

"Um, what is black pudding?" I asked hesitantly.

Edward exchanged a look with Esme. "You wouldn't want to know, dear," she answered.

"Then I think I'll skip it."

"Oh, try it, love. You might like it." Edward threw me an amused look.

"No, that's okay. Really," I said slowly.

Edward shrugged and poured me a bowl of cereal. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to let Esme make breakfast. "Suit yourself."

After a while, I couldn't stand sitting and doing nothing, so I helped Esme finish breakfast and carry it to Edward's large, round dining table.

Sitting down to eat with everyone, I was suddenly so sure of my relationship with Edward. I belonged with this man. I belonged with this family. It was everything I'd been missing in my life until now. Despite how much I loved my parents-and all my mother's kookiness-I needed this natural flow of conversation as we all ate the gluttonous spread in front of us. I loved the cheerfulness that came from Alice mixed with the calm, comical way Jasper had about him. I needed to feel the nurturing love that Esme had for all of us, who unlike my mother, wasn't afraid to be maternal and didn't constantly try to be my best friend. I needed the simple display of love Carlisle had for everyone, instead of keeping it bottled up like Charlie so often did.

It was amazing to feel like I was a part of the family I'd always idealized as a child. The family that I'd lost at such a young age.

Before I knew it, everything was cleaned up and Edward's family was loading their luggage into their cars.

I threw my arms around Esme and squeezed her tightly. I felt like such a fucking idiot for being so emotional all of the sudden. "We'll see each other soon," she promised with a laugh.

"Spring break," I blurted out, catching Edward's confused look.

I usually spent time with Charlie over spring break, but I could make an exception this year and spend more time with him over the summer.

Alice bounced with her enthusiasm. "Let's all go to England that week. When is it?"

"Second full week in March. Edward and I could leave on the twelfth and stay until the twentieth?" I gave Edward a nervous glance. "Unless you have things to do already," I mumbled, blushing hotly.

"No matter, I'll rearrange it. We'll stay at the London flat," he offered with a smile. "I can show you where I used to live. Maybe we can even spend a few days at the manor house."

"That sounds wonderful," Esme said excitedly. She took a pen and paper out of her purse and scribbled down something. "Here." She thrust the paper toward me. "I know you could get this from Edward, but I want you to take it from me, so you know I'm sincere when I tell you this. Ring me anytime you want. I'd especially like to hear how that ball goes. Not to mention how my son reacts when he sees you."

My vision blurred with freaking irrational tears as I took it from her. "Thanks. I'll do that."

I told Alice goodbye next, promising her that I'd keep in touch with her, and somehow agreeing to go shopping with her one day in London as well.

Jasper took my hand and kissed it, his eyes flashing humorously while he did. "Bella, darling, I'll miss you," he joked. "Keep Masen in line, would you? I can't keep his ego in check all by myself," he drawled.

"Edward does not have an ego," I laughed.

"Oh, baby, believe me, with you around? He most definitely is going to have an ego. Especially when all these Cali boys start drooling over your pictures and asking for your autograph. In personal areas." He waggled his eyebrows and gave me a lecherous smile.

"Knock it off, Jasper," Edward snarled.

Jasper's head cocked to the side, but he didn't say anything. "Y'all have fun now."

"Could you be any more of a hick?" I asked him with a grin.

He grinned back. "Probably. I'll see ya later."

Carlisle murmured something in Edward's ear and clapped him on the back. After a few moments, they broke away, and he took my face in his large hands.

"Goodbye, darling. It was a pleasure to get to know you and see why Edward loves you so. Believe it or not, we'll all miss you dearly." He pulled me against him in a brief hug. "I'll see you this March. Be safe, be careful, and please don't make me a grandfather just yet."

I giggled at his desperate look while Edward groaned in embarrassment. "Dad, come on. We're perfectly capable of making rational decisions about something that important."

"But accidents do occur," he said ominously.

Edward rolled his eyes and shoved Carlisle out the door. "Out, now! It's none of your business what I do. For God's sake, I'm thirty-eight, and you're trying to give me a sex talk? What is the matter with you?"

Carlisle chuckled. "I'm simply doing my duty as a father."

Edward mumbled something unintelligible under his breath, but his lips were quirking with a smile.

We stood at the door until they were gone. Edward gently shut the door and took my hand, spinning me around with a delighted look on his face.

"You were magnificent. You had them eating out of the palm of your hand. My God, Isabella, my own father was in love with you."

I flushed and bent my head down. "I liked them. A lot."

He pulled my chin up and stared down at me with a stunning smile on his face. "You are going to be incredible by my side at the premiere."

I arched my brow challengingly. "Oh, you think I'm going to that stupid thing? That's in May. What makes you think you'll be around that long?"

His eyes darkened. "You'll be around. If I have to tie you to the bed and hold you hostage, you'll be around."

I walked my fingers up his chest. "I might just hold you to that, Masen."

He let out a guttural sound and pulled me up so that my toes were barely touching the floor while he plundered my mouth with his in a heated kiss. I moaned as his tongue pushed against mine, only to be interrupted by the buzzer on the gate.

"Did they forget something?" I asked breathlessly.

He released me, but I kept a firm grip on him to keep from falling over while I caught my breath and waited for the room to stop spinning.

The buzzer sounded again.

Edward made a rude noise of disgust and strode into the kitchen to view the security camera. "It's Jessica!" He shouted in disbelief.

"Now what?" I called back.

"Hide!" he teased.

"Fuck that!"

He laughed. "Go make sure you don't look like I just tried to shag you in the foyer! I'll let her up."

I grumbled in annoyance, but did as I was told and went to the bathroom in the study so that Jessica wouldn't suspect anything. True to his word, my lips were a pink and swollen and my hair was all over the place. My chest was blotchy from getting so worked up, and my face was flushed.

I didn't even remember his hands in my hair.

_How the hell did he do that?_

I ran my hands through it and splashed some cold water on my face in an attempt to rid my cheeks of their crimson hue.

Once I was sure I didn't look like I'd been fucked six ways to Sunday-which was weird considering he'd only kissed me-I took a deep breath and opened the door.

Only to slam it shut at the sight behind it.

* * *

**Edward**

I pushed the button to raise the gate and waited impatiently for Jessica to ring the doorbell. I was so close to taking Bella into the bedroom and fully exploring her naked body until she came loudly-because in five days, she'd been unable to do so.

As much as I enjoyed my family's visit, and the sight of them with Bella, I was grateful they were gone so that I could get back to life as it was before. The ball was tomorrow night, and not only could I not wait to see Bella dressed in formal glory, but I couldn't wait for it to be over, so that we could move on with our lives instead of being stymied in this horribly false world of us being together when we were alone, and being merely employee/employer in public.

Jessica rang the doorbell, and Samson barked threateningly at the sound. I gave him a funny look, because he normally didn't do such a thing, and smacked the top of his head lightly to get his attention.

"Hush, you twit. Do you want the neighbors to think you're uncivilized?"

He stopped barking, only to growl instead.

I rolled my eyes and reached for the door. "Yes, I know she's no Bella. I'm not too keen on her either, but at least I can be polite." He cocked his head like he understood everything I said. "Besides, you don't even like Bella. Shouldn't you be jumping for joy that someone's invading her territory?"

He whined and turned to walk away.

That had to be the strangest interaction I'd ever had with another mammal.

I opened the door and smiled politely. "Hello, Jessica. What can I do for you?"

"Took you long enough to answer," she joked. "What were you doing? Running around in drag?"

The joke fell flat, but I continued to smile politely anyway.

"No, my dog was being a nuisance. I opted to calm him down instead of allowing him to jump through the doorway and charge at you," I told her stoically. "Come in."

"There's a blue car parked outside. Well, it's always here. Is it that girl's car?" she asked as she stepped over the threshold.

I nodded and walked with her into the study. "My assistant. Bella. You've met before, haven't you?"

"Yeah. Your gate tried to decelerate her. It was funny, now that I think about it." She giggled. It was this high-pitched sound that gave me the unconscious desire to shudder like when someone drags their fingernails down a blackboard.

I repressed that urge and stared at her blankly for a moment until I finally realized she'd meant to say decapitate. Which was not funny at all. Not to me.

"I think you meant decapitate," I corrected her kindly.

"That's what I said."

_Right._

"What can I do for you?" I asked, instead of turning her around and throwing her out the door like I so desperately wanted.

"Oh! That. I totally forgot what I came here for." She smiled sweetly. "I need your help."

"With?" I prompted.

She bit on her lip in an obvious attempt to be coy. It was nothing like when Bella did it. "Well, you see, I have to leave for Europe in a few days to promote my new movie. I usually have Ben watch my precious Jasmine-"

"Jasmine?" I questioned.

"My Balinese." Oh, Jesus. We were discussing a cat. "Yeah, so, Ben usually watches her for me while I'm gone... And I don't know if you've heard, but we recently broke up, so he's left me in a pinch." She scrunched her nose up like this displeased her.

"Yes, I believe I heard that somewhere. My apologies," I offered, feigning sincerity.

If she only knew...

"Thanks." She gave the floor a pitiful look.

My God, she was the worst actress I'd ever met.

"What does this have to do with me?" I prompted, yet again.

She snapped out of whatever she was doing and giggled again. I gritted my teeth to keep from grimacing. "Could you keep her for me while I'm gone?"

"I'm allergic," I uttered unthinkingly.

Jessica's face fell. "You are?"

"Highly," I lied. I glanced around the room. Where was Bella?

Jessica took a quick step to close the distance between us and buried her face into my chest. "What am I going to do?" she cried. "I can't leave her here all alone!"

"You can't take her? I occasionally take Samson with me." I tried to move away from her, but she came with me.

I patted her shoulder awkwardly while she continued to wail. I stared up at the ceiling, desperate for it to pass.

"I can't take her. We'll be traveling too much. I can't stand to keep her in one of those crates all the time!"

"That does pose a bit of a dilemma," I mumbled.

"You really can't take her for me? I'll only be gone for a couple of weeks," she begged.

"No. I can't. Really. I get all puffy and itchy. I can't really breathe, either." I shifted on my feet. I was so uncomfortable, it was all I could do to lie convincingly. "Then there's the dog," I said, suddenly inspired. "He loathes cats. I'm afraid if I took Jasmine, you'd come home to nothing but some leftover fur. And possibly a tail, but that's beside the point."

_Good God, I'm rambling now._

"Bella used to work at a grooming place in West Hollywood. Perhaps they could kennel her for you?" I suggested.

She gasped and stared up at me with a relieved smile. "Oh, my God, you're so smart! My vet was booked already, but do you think your assistant could get her in?"

"No harm in asking."

"Wait, they won't keep her cooped up all day, will they?"

"I doubt it. Angela is very compassionate. She wouldn't dare leave your precious Jasmine in a crate all day."

I tried to back away again, but she held onto me tighter. I could see the intent in her eyes as she licked her lips and nearly had a heart attack.

As it was, I managed to break free just as the door to the loo opened. Then slammed shut again.

_No._

"Bella!" I shouted, brushing past Jessica and straight for the door.

I knocked, close to panicking at the thought of Bella thinking that I was going to kiss Jessica.

"Bella, are you all right? Nothing happened, I swear!" I racked my brain for something witty to say. "Erm, in the words of Jasper, I wouldn't touch her with a ten-foot pole dressed in a hazmat suit?" I was vaguely aware of Jessica's cry of protest, but ignored it.

Bella made a strange noise-laughter?-on the other side of the door. "I'm okay. I'm just fucking blind, that's all. Give me a minute to get my sight back and try to control the insane urge I have right now to vomit all over your pretty bathroom."

I laughed at her sarcasm and with the relief that she wasn't angry with me. "Take your time," I smirked. "I'll be waiting out here. With Jessica."

The door flung open immediately.

"Ah, there you are. Looking ravishing as usual."

Bella simply gave me a look that stated she was in no way amused right now.

I ran my hand through my hair and gave her a sheepish smile. "Jessica was just wondering if you could call Angela and have her cat kenneled over at Groomingdale's."

"She was, was she?" she asked doubtfully. "I don't think that was all she was doing."

I shrugged. "It was all I was doing." I made sure to communicate the humiliating position I was just in with my eyes.

Bella smiled and touched my forearm comfortingly.

"Oh, my God!" Jessica screeched, pointing at the two of us wildly. "You two... Oh, shit!" She amazingly looked as though she remembered something. "What about Tanya?"

"I'm not entirely sure what you're insinuating," I replied calmly.

She laughed. "Wait till this gets out!"

Bella took a step forward. "Are you planning on blabbing whatever you think 'this' is all over town?"

"Me?" She shook her head. "No, I'll leave that up to you. I know I wouldn't be able to keep my mouth shut if I was dating this fine piece of ass."

Bella gazed up at me, struggling not to laugh at Jessica's idiocy. "Well, then. I guess our secret's safe, isn't it, baby? At least, until I decide to hit up _OK!_ with an exclusive." She gently nudged Jessica toward the door. "I'll call Angela and see if she can open up a spot for your cat. When are you leaving?"

"Sunday."

"That shouldn't be a problem. I'll call you tomorrow and let you know something." She smiled graciously as she practically shoved Jessica out onto the front porch. "Bye."

"Bye! Thanks so much!"

"Uh-huh!" she responded in a sugary tone.

Bella slammed the door shut and spun around to face me. I stood there gaping like a fool for a few seconds before I grinned madly at her. She'd managed to take care of Jessica's so-called problem and have her out the door in a matter of seconds.

"I am in awe of your skills," I teased. "I must remember to bow to you the next time you're naked in front of me."

"Well, if you feel like me, that's now. Because I don't know about you, but I'm going to need another shower after that. I feel so dirty," she said with a dramatic shudder.

I chuckled and kissed her temple while I wrapped my arms around her. "God, you're amazing." I pulled back enough to see her face. "This is me worshipping before the bow, by the way."

She beamed up at me. "I like it. Continue, please."

* * *

I yanked my glasses off my face and pinched my nose in frustration. I'd just made the mistake of reading that bloody script Bella was so convinced was for me. It was bold and witty and had enormous potential to be groundbreaking with the way they'd planned to use CG effects. Not only that, but I connected instantly to the man on paper.

The problem with it was that she was absolutely, one-hundred percent correct. I wanted it. Badly.

It meant I had a lot of rescheduling to do. Not only would I need to make time to shoot the film, but I'd need to allot time to travel to promote it. Again.

But perhaps this time it wouldn't be so bad. If I could schedule interviews and appearances during the summer, or even around the holidays, I could have Bella by my side-at least for part of it. I couldn't expect her to drop everything and fly around the world with me as something like arm candy.

Bella was much too good for that role.

I picked up my mobile and called Bella. "Love?" I asked when she answered. "Are you busy at the moment?"

"No, just sitting here waiting for Emmett and Rosalie to get here. Why?"

"Because I think I'd like to have you come back over so I can throttle you," I answered coolly.

"Um, okay?"

"This script..."

She laughed. "You like it, don't you?"

"Yes, unfortunately, I do," I sighed. "Now what?"

"Now you take the role, dummy. Call your people or whatever it is you do."

"Normally, I would have my agent contact the studio and start contract negotiations before my lawyer saw the finished product," I replied. "But since my former agent is currently sitting behind bars awaiting trial..."

"Hire someone else," she suggested.

"I don't necessarily trust anyone else. I don't trust anyone in the business, for that matter."

"It's Hollywood. Of course you don't trust anyone. Watch your back and you'll be fine. You've got a ton of experience, you know when someone's trying to screw you over. And it's one movie. Right?"

"Without a doubt. I'm not ever considering this again. No matter what you say," I told her with a smile.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm a pain in the ass, I get it." She exhaled loudly. "There's no one you can think of to hire as a temporary agent?"

"You." I blanched, immediately regretting having said that aloud. "Never mind, forget I mentioned it."

"Me?" she shrieked. "Are you nuts?"

I chuckled. "Quite possibly."

"Edward, I didn't even really watch movies until I met you. I wouldn't know where to begin-"

"But I do. I know every aspect of the business. I could help you until you gain your footing." She scoffed in my ear. "Bella, you have no idea how great you were handling Jessica today. You're a natural. You were able to give her what she wanted while politely but firmly kicking her out the door. I merely stood there like some sort of mute twit."

"If you know so much about it, why can't you do it yourself?" she countered.

"Erm, did you not just hear me call myself a mute twit?" She giggled, making me smile. "Because I can't juggle everything at once, love. I can't keep focus on learning the part, acting the part, and doing interviews if I'm constantly battling phone calls from various publications and television programs all over the world. It's why I've always relied heavily on an agent and a publicist. They allow me to do my job to the best of my ability."

"I don't know," she said slowly.

"You know what? Don't worry about it. I'm not about to push you into anything you're uncomfortable with. I'll phone Royce's agency in the morning and see who's available. You're right, I have the experience to know if someone tries to screw me over."

She was silent for a while. So long, I almost checked the screen of my mobile to see if we'd somehow been disconnected. "I'll do it," she finally said quietly.

"What?" I asked in excited disbelief.

"I said I'll do it," she repeated. "Jesus fuck, what have I gotten myself into?" she asked on a laugh.

"Bella!" I exclaimed, unable to hide my excitement. "Are you absolutely certain?"

"I think so," she responded. I knew she was smiling by the sound of her voice.

I leaped off the bed and ran straight for the kitchen. After a second's hesitation, I grabbed the keys to the R8 and went straight for the car. "Don't move," I instructed Bella as I got in.

I sped down the streets of LA, determined to get to Bella as quickly as I could. I had to see her face, her eyes, to know she was sure, that she wasn't doing something simply to make me happy.

I pulled into a space and rushed to Bella's door. I knocked, waiting impatiently for her to answer it, and was greeted by her warm smile when she opened the door.

"Why did you come over here?" She looked out toward the parking lot. "And were you followed?"

I hadn't even thought to check. I mentally berated myself for a moment and then shook my head. "I don't think so."

"If you're not sure, you'd better not come in," she said with a disappointed look on her face.

"Not bloody likely." I shoved her back with my body as I held on to her and slammed the door shut with my foot. "I came all this way to see your face. I'm not leaving without knowing you're all right with this."

Her hands wrapped themselves in my hair, and she stood on her toes with a resolute expression on her face. "I'm sure."

A thrill shot through me as I saw the truthfulness of that statement. "It's only one film. As soon as it's over, your job is through," I swore.

"Why is this making you so happy?" she wondered with a laugh.

"I've no idea, but it does. Maybe it's because we'll be a team. Because slowly but surely, I'm tearing down those walls of yours and becoming as big a part of your life as you are in mine."

"You are," she said passionately. "I told you, I may not know what it's like to be chased down the street by paparazzi, and I may not be looking forward to that, but I am determined to give you everything you've given me. I want us to work, more than I've wanted anything else in my entire life. I'm tired of being scared. I'm tired of scaring you with all my bullshit insecurity. I may not have been sure of anything until recently, but I am so sure of it now. I would rather die than be without you. The rest I can live through."

I cupped her face in my hands and took her mouth with mine. "I think this is something to celebrate."

"What did you have in mind?" she breathed against my lips.

"Bedroom," I murmured as I dragged my lips over her jaw. "I think the bedroom is appropriate for what I have in mind."

* * *

**Forgot to mention above that I'm working on an outtake for Ch 16 involving Esme ripping Edward a new one...**


	18. Chapter 18

**I took my time on this chapter to make sure it was perfect, so I'm sorry for taking so long with it. **

**I forgot to mention a couple of chapters ago that Bella's dress is very similar to the dress Carrie Underwood wore to the Grammys a few weeks ago. If you want to see it, just Google 'Carrie Underwood Grammys 2010' and it should pop up. I saw it and knew it was 'the one'.**

**Thanks for the reviews and the recent adds. As soon as I get a banner, I'm going to post this to Twilighted and TWCSLibrary, because I have close to nothing left on my faves here anymore. Summer Nights and Defying Gravity are already up and running on both sites. (slowly but surely on Twilighted...Grrr)**

**Anyone have any suggestion on setting up a blog? I'm not exactly sure what I want. Also, I keep forgetting to say I'm on Twitter now, but I'm sooo bad about updating. Maybe if I know some peeps there, I'll be better about it. JennyB0719 if you're interested-gossip-bangkok, that was for you ;)**

**Thanks to Stratan for beta'ing this!**

* * *

Chapter 18

**Bella**

I shifted in Edward's arms and smiled widely at the warmth that came over me. Edward Masen was in my room. In my bed. It was a blissful scene I'd never once thought possible due to all the secrecy concerning our relationship.

I was his agent.

_Holy Christ._

I wasn't sure why I'd agreed to it, but miraculously, I didn't regret it. It felt good; right. I didn't think it was my calling in life per se, but I had this strange feeling that I'd be good at it. Damn good at it.

Maybe that was what Alice was referring to when she said that once he read the script we'd know why. It was like everything fell into place last night. Our future had suddenly mapped itself out for us, at least for the next couple of years. Edward was right; we were a team-in every way now.

We stayed up half the night devising a plan. I'd still apply to graduate school, because it was something Edward wanted me to do-if I was being completely honest, I wanted to do it, too-but it would take me much longer now to actually graduate and earn a master's. Not that it mattered, I'd get there eventually. He'd give me a copy of his contract on _Rogue_, and once I was comfortable with it, we'd call the studio execs and start negotiations. In the meantime, he was to call and informally accept the role so that it wasn't given to another actor. At my insistence, I'd continue to be his assistant unless juggling three things at once became too much for me. Then, we'd look for a replacement. _Together._ Edward wanted my input about everything.

Edward had plans to call his publicist over the weekend, so that we could meet with her and discuss the best way to come out to the public about our relationship, something we should have done from the beginning. It was incredibly stupid and naive of me to think that I'd be content being with him in secret. The press was bound to sensationalize us, but it didn't matter to me anymore.

Nothing mattered to me anymore except Edward himself. I'd changed-grown-so much over the last couple of months. I'd learned more about who I was and what I wanted. I realized that I was scared of loving Edward because I so wanted the serene gift of love and family. Even though I'd spent years convincing myself it didn't exist, and that I didn't believe in it, my subconscious never stopped looking for it. I was stronger than I was before I met him. I was sure of myself and my relationship with Edward, regardless of what people thought of us.

I was ready to finally start living life instead of hiding in the corner and watch it pass me by. It felt wonderful to finally have some kind of direction for myself instead of wandering around aimlessly like I'd been doing for so long.

I sighed contentedly and ran my fingers over the sinewy muscles of Edward's chest and stomach. I traced the beautiful bronze treasure trail of his, careful not to dip too low and stir Edward before he even woke up, and couldn't help but think that this was what euphoria felt like.

If only the bliss could have lasted a little while longer.

A loud thumping sounded from the other side of the wall, making me bury my head under my pillow and groan loudly.

I felt Edward move beside me and peeked up at him. He raked a hand through his chaotic hair and gave me a disturbed look. "Is that what I think it is?"

The thumping continued, faster and louder than before. "Yep. Welcome to my world. I like to call it 'The Emmett and Rosalie Fucking Each Other's Brains Out Hour'."

"An entire hour?"

"Well, not really. More like forty minutes, I guess."

"He's got some pretty decent stamina going for him then," Edward commented.

"Not as much as you. I think only the last ten minutes actually involves sex. I have no idea what they do the other thirty minutes to make that much noise."

He laughed once before his face registered the disgust at having to hear it until they were finished. "You have to listen to this every day?"

"Just about." I gave him a wicked grin at my sudden idea. "Want to give them a run for their money?"

He looked annoyed. "Bella, I'm not shagging you just to get back at Emmett."

"No, no, no. Make it sound like we are. You know, like in that movie. Uh, what the hell was it? It just came out?" I could _not_ remember the name of that stupid movie Emmett had made me watch with him. "Oh, well. What do you say?"

I gazed at him hopefully while chewing on my lip. Eventually, when the noises coming from the other room got to be too much for him, he relented.

"What do we do?" he asked, sitting up against my headboard.

"Okay, rock with me." I sat up next to him, holding the sheet over my body and started moving with Edward so that the bed would scoot back and hit the wall. "And moan. Really loudly."

"Jesus," Edward muttered, but he started moaning anyway, along with me.

I giggled. "You're really convincing. Say something naughty."

"Like what?" he asked incredulously over my moans. "Like how wet you are? How tight you are? Would you like me to throw the word 'fanny' in there as well? Or that I'd like to fuck you in the arse?"

I paused, astonished those words had willingly come out of his mouth. "Wow. The ass thing isn't happening, but that was some really graphic stuff coming from you. Say it. All of it."

He shook his head adamantly and slammed his body against the headboard. "No. Those words don't make an appearance when we're actually having sex, why would I say them now?"

We kept it up until we were met with silence. I gave it one final good 'Oh, Edward', and then watched the door expectantly.

"Wait for it," I whispered gleefully to Edward.

Heavy footsteps came from the hall, getting louder as they got closer. Emmett charged into the room with a menacing expression on his face and a pillow covering himself up.

He took one look at the innocent scene in front of him and snarled. "God damn it, Bella! That shit's not funny!"

"Got 'cha," I giggled hysterically.

He shook his head and grinned back. "You made your point."

"Good. Welcome back."

As soon as the door slammed behind him, I jumped on top of Edward and peppered kisses all over his face. "Thank you!"

"To see you this happy, I'd do it any day," he responded with his own broad smile.

He placed his hands on each side of my face and brought me closer to him so that he could kiss me. The taste of his kiss seared me-even though I thought for a brief moment that I should be disgusted by the fact that we were sharing morning breath germs-and moaned into his mouth.

He pulled away before I was ready. "I should go," he said reluctantly, "before your neighbors start their day and it becomes impossible for me to leave without being noticed."

My bottom lip jutted out. It was very childish, but I couldn't help it. "I don't want you to go," I whined-almost petulantly. My happy morning had just been wrecked by his fame.

"I don't want to go either," he said softly. "But I'll see you this evening."

The thought of Edward in a tux perked me up a little. "Okay." I gave him a quick kiss and hopped off the bed to get dressed.

After we were both dressed, I grudgingly walked Edward to the door.

"Come here," he murmured, grabbing the waistband of my sweats and pulling me toward him. He inhaled against my hair, almost like he was sniffing me.

"Are you smelling me, Masen?" I asked with a giggle.

He gave me an unrepentant smile in return. "I love your scent. It's floral and feminine but has this exoticness to it as well. I can never get enough of it."

"I like the way you smell, too."

_Strange conversation to be having here..._

He gazed down at me. "I will so miss you this afternoon. Luckily, I have the thought of seeing you in a ball gown to keep me from being suicidal." He smirked.

"Yeah. I can see the headlines now," I said sarcastically. "Edward Masen kills himself because of a few hours away from his PA. So tragic."

"Extremely," he said solemnly. "The world will weep for years."

I laughed.

He grinned crookedly back. "What time will you be arriving?"

"Jacob's picking me up at eight," I told him.

"Very well, I'll see you later then."

He bent down to place a gentle kiss on my lips, but I didn't want a simple kiss. I wanted him to feel how much I suddenly wanted to stay with him, how much I_ needed_ to stay with him. I latched my fingers onto the silken strands of his hair and held him against me as I gave him the fiercest kiss I could manage.

A groan came from low in his throat, and he fisted my shirt in his hands before he jerked himself back. "Isabella," he warned.

"What?" I widened my eyes innocently and stood on my toes to trace my tongue over his lips. "Bye, baby."

He gave me a disapproving look. "I'll see you tonight."

He darted out the door before I could do or say anything back.

I sighed and turned around to see Rosalie leaning against the wall. Startled, I yelped and brought my hand to my chest.

"Shit, you scared me."

"Sorry. You and your boy put on quite a show earlier." She arched her brow.

"Yeah, well, now you know what it feels like."

Her lips quirked, but she didn't laugh. "Listen, I should apologize for ignoring your calls. I..." She took a breath. "I needed to get away from everything, you know? I've got lawyers calling me constantly, the press still trying to get a hold of me, and then I figured I must be an awful friend for you to feel like you had to lie to me about Masen-"

"You're not an awful friend!" I argued emphatically. "You're my best friend. I went about this whole thing all wrong. From the very beginning. I should be apologizing, not you."

"So let's just call it even. We both fucked up. I was a bitch about him; you misjudged my reaction."

"Deal," I said quickly.

She started toward the kitchen. "I don't know about you, but I'm starved." She stopped abruptly. "You've got that ball tonight, don't you?"

"Yup."

"This should be interesting."

I went over and sat down at the table. "You're telling me. I'm an idiot for agreeing to go."

"No argument there," she replied playfully.

"Haha." I watched her go through the refrigerator for a moment. "Rose?"

"Hmm?"

"I need your help with something."

She slowly turned to face me with a skeptical expression. "Uh, do I need to be worried about this 'something'?"

"No!" I scrunched up my nose. "Jesus, it's nothing like that. I think we'd be happy about something like that."

"Oh." She looked relieved. "Okay. What's up?"

"I agreed to be Edward's agent," I said hesitantly.

"What?" she asked in shock. "_Why_?"

"His sister has this weird psychic sense, and she said that we should read this script that came to his house. So we did. Now, he wants the role but needs an agent, and I kind of agreed to do it," I hurried.

"You don't even like movies!"

"That's what I said!"

She had this sudden look of confusion on her face. "Wait, Edward has a sister?"

"No," I said pointedly. "Not that you or anyone else knows of."

She laughed."Why did you agree to do this?"

"It feels right; I want to do it. I can't explain it," I muttered.

"So what do you want me to do?" She put her elbows on the counter and waited expectantly for my answer.

"I need you to teach me everything about the film industry."

Her expression was stoic. I couldn't tell what she was thinking. "How long do I have?"

"Next week," I squeaked. I cleared my throat nervously.

"Well, fuck."

I bit my lip. "Sorry?"

She rolled her eyes. "I guess we'd better get started then."

* * *

I opened the door to see Jacob standing on the other side in a black tux. His black hair was gelled into neat spikes, his russet skin stood out against the white of his collar, and those black eyes of his tried to break loose from his skull as they roamed my body.

"Holy shit," he laughed. "You look hot."

I didn't know whether to laugh or smack him. I opted for the latter and slapped my hand against his chest. "Thanks, asshole. You say it like it's so hard to believe."

"Not at all. You have to know you're gorgeous to attract someone like Masen." He threw me a look that clearly told me how blind he thought I was. "My point was that you look really good." He flashed me a huge smile and waggled his eyebrows. "Really, really good."

"Thanks." I shifted uncomfortably and smoothed my dress. "I feel like an idiot."

"You are an idiot. Now the outside matches the inside," he joked.

I didn't smile back.

I felt so awkward. The dress was amazing and wasn't uncomfortable like most formal gowns looked to be, but I was so overly made up, I didn't _feel _like me. My hair was up, intricately woven in knots and twisting braids at the nape of my neck. I had so much makeup on, I was hardly recognizable, and I had more jewelry on my body than I'd realized I owned. Not to mention the shoes. I was anxiously waiting for the second I lost my footing and fell flat on my ass-most likely in front of the entire press line.

Jacob's posture changed, going completely rigid with seriousness. "Do you not want to go?"

Not really, but I was determined to. I had to think of this as a sort of dress rehearsal for all the times I'd be expected to be by Edward's side. It was awards season. I had no plans to accompany him to any of these ceremonies, but if things went well for us over the next few weeks, my first public appearance with Edward might be in March at The Academy Awards instead of at _Rogue's_ premiere in May.

"No, it's fine," I said reassuringly.

Jacob rubbed the back of his neck. "Listen, I know it's weird at first, but it gets easier. I promise. Once you know what to expect, you'll dread going to these types of things for a completely different reason. Boredom. It was one of the reasons I asked you to come with me tonight."

"Yeah?"

He poked the tip of my nose with his index finger softly. "Yeah. You're fun. I have fun talking to you. You're the only person who doesn't treat me differently just because of what I do. I like that."

"That's because you're like all the other LA tards out there," I teased back with a smile.

He grinned back. "Good. You're smiling. I promised Edward I'd keep you happy."

"You talked to Edward about me?" I questioned in surprise. Jacob and Edward made it a point never to talk to each other unless absolutely necessary.

"Yeah, well, Tutankhamen asked me to make sure you had a good time. I am under specific instructions to keep you safe, happy, and away from the press." He paused. "He's kind of a control freak, you know that?"

I giggled. "He likes things just so."

He held his arm out to me. "Can we get out of here before the entire complex spots the limo out front?"

"A limo?" He nodded once. "God, you are such a cheeseball."

He chuckled as I took his arm. "Shut it, Swan. Under direct orders, remember?"

"I remember."

I let him help me into the limo so that I didn't catch my dress with one of my heels. Once we were both inside, Jacob leaned over and pushed the button that controlled the partition-sending it up and blocking the driver's view of us.

I lifted my brow questioningly. "Um, Jacob?"

He grinned. "Just keeping up appearances." He handed me a crystal flute and poured champagne into it. "Liquid courage."

I let out my breath unevenly. "Yeah, I think I need it. Just one though," I said hastily. "I'm liable to make an ass out of myself if I drink any more. Or make a mess of my dress."

"Definitely don't want you to ruin that pretty dress. It doesn't exactly fall into the 'keeping Bella happy' category."

We caught up, talking about Billy and Charlie, things happening with Jacob's career, and a little about Edward until Jacob abruptly leaned over and pushed the button to bring the partition back down.

"Could you stop on the corner, please?" he asked the driver.

The driver agreed, and stopped the limo at the curb.

"What the hell are we doing?" Surely he wasn't dropping me off at the corner like a hooker who'd just finished doing him in the backseat.

Jacob rolled his eyes. "I'm getting out and walking the next couple of blocks. You're getting curbside service. I'll see you in a few minutes, okay?"

I nodded and watched Jacob climb out of the limo numbly. I was really going to do this.

Oh. My. Fuck.

I stared ahead as the limo lurched forward and began shaking nervously. I suddenly, desperately needed Edward here to calm me down. I hadn't realized how much I truly relied on him until now. His mere presence always made me feel like I could face anything, and even though I prided myself on being independent, I was mature enough to admit that I would do much better facing something like this with his gentle voice murmuring comfortingly in my ear.

The limo stopped, and the door was opened by one of the staff members. The man held his hand out toward me, and I took hold of it. Everything seemed to go in slow motion. I got out of the car and gave another man my name while lights flashed feverishly in the background. I could feel the heat rising to my cheeks as he checked my name on the list and motioned for me to go forward.

I took a deep breath and a step forward, and someone shouted my name. I looked around wildly, surprised that someone even knew who I was until my eyes rested on the reporter that was at my apartment the night Royce broke in.

He looked harmless-lean and tall with a surfer's blond hair and brown eyes-but I knew there must be some reason for Edward to have reacted so strongly to his being there that night. Edward was the most reasonable man I'd ever met.

I carefully made my way over to him and fixed a bright smile on my face.

"I'm sorry, do I know you?" I asked, feigning confusion. I just hoped my acting abilities had improved in the last few months. I was always a horrible liar.

"James." He waited for me to acknowledge him, but I simply cocked my head to the side and gave him a funny look. "James Eliot. I broke the story about your roommate's attack."

"Oh, I remember. Didn't Mr. Masen give you a statement?"

He nodded and sneered. "If you could call it that." His eyes raked over my face, then my body appreciatively. Slowly. Uncomfortably slow. "You look nice. How'd you get invited to an event like this?"

I fought the urge to slam my fist into that condescending mouth of his with everything I had. "Just got lucky, I suppose," I said evasively.

"Your boy invite you?"

My heart slammed into my throat. "My boy?"

He gave me a knowing look. "You know, your boy... Don't be coy with me, Bella."

I kept my face in its fixed, unemotional mask, but inside, I was reeling.

_He knows. He knows. He knows. Oh, shit..._

"Wh-?"

"Bella!" Jacob grabbed my arm and spun me around, enveloping me in his massive arms. "Play along," he whispered in my ear.

He pulled away with a look of excitement on his face. "There you are!" He leaned down and kissed my cheek. "I've been calling you all day. I wanted to get together again."

"Uh, okay." I struggled to keep the fact that I was totally baffled by his behavior out of my voice.

"Come inside with me."

He didn't give me a chance to argue. He simply inclined his head toward James, who looked to be just as bemused as I was, and dragged me toward the door.

I stared up at the building and nearly stopped in my tracks.

"Jacob! We're at someone's house!" I almost gaped at the monstrosity in front of me. It was so big and grand, I'd assumed it was a hotel at first.

He stared at me like I'd lost my mind. Clearly, I had. "Yes," he said slowly.

"Someone lives here?" I shouted in disbelief.

He chuckled. "Lower your voice, dumbass. They call this place Volterra. It's so big, it requires a staff of over a hundred to run it properly. Aro Cruz lives here. He's the most powerful man in the business. He has the ability to destroy your career with a wave of his hand and make your movie tank at the box office with just a word. He's freaky as fuck, but what can you do?"

I nodded. "What was all that back there?"

"I didn't like the way that jackoff was looking at you," he explained simply.

"Oh." I didn't complain about his maneuver in front of all the cameras, because I was fairly certain he'd just saved me from confirming something James wasn't entirely sure of yet.

We were led into a huge ballroom by another man waiting at the door. The ceiling was barreled and painted to look like the sky. Massive crystal chandeliers hung down from the highest point of the ceiling to light the room brightly. The walls were a creamy color and had the most intricately carved white woodwork and moldings I'd ever seen. Columns lined the room on both sides, creating an open doorway toward more private areas of the room. Tall French doors stood at the back of the room, leading to a wide balcony. The tables, flowers, and decorations were all black and white. More photographers stood in strategic places, taking pictures of the guests as they made conversation and danced.

My heels clicked on the white marble floor as Jacob led me to the bar. "Who the fuck has a ballroom in their house?"

"I told you he was a freak," Jacob laughed.

Jacob ordered us both water, and while I waited, I scanned the room for Edward.

He wasn't hard to find.

He was standing with a group of men, smiling and charming the pants off of them. He said something, and everyone around him dissolved into laughter. He looked extraordinary, so elegant and striking, dressed in a tuxedo. His hair was its usual disaster, but it made him seem more approachable.

He glanced up and found me. Even though his facial expression didn't change, his eyes bore straight into mine. My heart fluttered stupidly in my chest, and I took an involuntary step toward him, wanting to feel that delicious hum that surrounded us when we were together. I wanted to smile at him, to show him how utterly and inconceivably happy I was to finally see him, but couldn't.

A wave of sadness washed over me. I had no way to express how great I thought he looked, how much seeing him in his tux made me want to find a spare bedroom and have my way with him. I couldn't let him see how happy he made me. I had to be blank, impassive. Detached.

I wanted to cry. I wanted to cry for myself and Edward. For this fucked up situation I'd gotten us involved in.

Hot tears flooded my vision, and I looked away from him, unable to stand it any longer.

Jacob quickly took notice and took my face in his large hands. "Can you do this?"

"I don't know," I answered brokenly.

He glanced up and swore. "You're going to have to figure it out. And fast. The old man is on his way over now."

* * *

**Edward**

I stood with the executives at King Pictures, networking and feeding large quantities of horse manure to the arseholes surrounding me while I waited for Bella to arrive. If there was anything about being an actor that I despised, it was this type of thing exactly, but I'd learned at an early age that it was a necessary evil if I wanted to continue to be offered roles without auditioning for them.

I felt a jolt run down my spine, a tingle of electricity that was so familiar, and looked up to see Bella staring at me. She looked incredible, like a divine Grecian goddess sent from Mount Olympus itself. Her dress suited her. It was natural and beautiful all at once, much like she was every day. Her hair was away from her face, and I could see the color rise to her cheeks as I gazed at her, letting her see the desire I had for her with my eyes since I couldn't do what was circling round my mind at the moment.

I wanted nothing more than to kiss those plump, pink lips and let the world know she was mine before taking her home to ravish her.

Suddenly, her entire demeanor changed. She shifted on her feet and looked away from me like it was unbearable to see me. She chewed on her lip, and my heart plummeted. She looked so despondent, so heartbroken.

I'd done that to her. I'd forced her into a life she didn't want, because at the time, she wasn't ready to get so seriously involved with me. I let my intensity blind my every move, and now, we were both paying dearly for it. She was ready to be everything I wanted and needed her to be, to be as firmly committed to me as I was to her, and instead of being able to celebrate in that, we were trapped by my fame-my fear from day one.

Having to come face to face with her reaction to this was more terrifying than I'd ever thought possible.

I broke away from the conversation and strode determinately over to her. I didn't care who saw at this point; my main concern was Bella.

Tanya's face jerked me back to reality. "Edward! Did you see who's here?" she snickered. "Your assistant!"

I gave Tanya a hard look. She'd straightened every curl out of her hair and had on a strapless, skin-tight black gown on. She was the complete opposite of Bella, and I suddenly and unexpectedly wanted to let her know how much I truly despised her.

"I'm on my way to say hello, now," I told her coldly.

"Why?"

"Because, Tanya," I said, exasperated, "I want to. Mind your own business, for God's sake."

She grabbed a hold of my arm, preventing me from stepping away from her. "My business tonight, Edward, is to make sure you don't make me look like a fool. Play the part."

I stiffened and gave her a baleful look. "Let go, before I do something you won't be able to explain," I seethed.

She gawked openly at me for a moment before composing herself and moving away.

I heard her huff behind me as I continued my walk toward Bella. Jacob looked up at me and shook his head, but I ignored him.

"Bella?"

"Edward, don't. Just go. I don't want to make a scene." The sound of her voice broke me.

"Bella, talk to me, please. I can't stand to see you so sad," I whispered pleadingly.

She shook her head.

"Edward, people are starting to notice," Jacob said lowly.

I took a step back and held out my hand. "Dance?" I asked hopefully. "We can talk without anyone realizing a thing."

She nodded and pulled in a shuddering breath. I led her to the center of the room where a few other couples danced about and reluctantly held her at a distance as I started to spin with her.

"You look incredible, love," I breathed. "Everyone here is staring at you."

She flushed. "Are you sure they're not staring at you?"

"No, they're certainly not. It angers me a little, to be quite honest with you."

She smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. "Have you gone all British caveman on me?" I stared down at her blankly. "Maybe you should come back from ancient Mesopotamia and relearn how we do things here in the twenty-first century. The jealous boyfriend thing won't fly with me."

"All right, I'll try not to be jealous of the various men who are currently thinking of you naked or waiting in the wings to put their grubby paws all over you," I said tightly.

"Sucks, doesn't it?" My brows knit. "I have to live every day knowing my boyfriend stars in millions of women's fantasies all over the world, and that a lot of them would do anything-to me specifically-to make that fantasy a reality."

"I'm sorry." I wanted so badly to hold her against me.

She looked puzzled. "For what?"

"Everything," I admitted. "For pushing myself into your life before you were ready. If I'd simply waited a while and let things progress with us naturally, we wouldn't be here right now. Pretending like we hardly know each other outside of a business perspective."

"Edward, it's my fault," she argued. "I was the one who was too fucking scared of what was happening with us to even _try_ to have a normal relationship with you. I was the one who said we should hide, not you."

"But I was the one who told you I was falling in love with you after only knowing you for two weeks."

She laughed. "And you made me actually think about what I was feeling for you. So I should be thanking you for that instead of listening to you apologize for it."

I grinned back at her. "Then thank away."

She rolled her eyes. "No."

"I see Emmett did an excellent job with the dance instruction," I told her, changing the subject.

"I haven't stepped on your toes once. The night's still young, though. So watch it," she teased.

"Are you all right now?"

She nodded. "It just hit me that I can't hold your hand or feel you pull me into your side like I'm so used to. It'll be a long night, but I'll be fine," she said reassuringly.

I studied her face to make sure she was as she said. She knew exactly what I was doing and gave me a silly grin.

I laughed and twirled her around before I dipped her and heard her stifle a squeal of delight. I pulled her back up and was welcomed to the sight of a genuinely happy smile.

"Meet me on the balcony at midnight? I want to start the New Year right," I said softly.

"Okay."

The song came to an end, and I reluctantly stepped away from her. "Come meet a few people?" I wasn't ready to be away from her yet.

She nodded. "Only if we include Jacob so that it doesn't look bad."

My lips formed a pout at that. "I suppose we should include Tanya at some point as well then."

"It would be smart."

I put my hand on the small of her back and led her to the bar where Jacob was waiting. "What if I said I was tired of being smart? What if I'm ready to tell everyone to bugger off and make it known that I'm in love with you?"

"Edward," she started.

"Hey!" Jacob interrupted. "You good?"

She nodded. "I'm good. Sorry about that."

"It's cool."

"Jacob, I was going to take Bella to meet Aro before I relinquished her over to you for the evening. Care to join us?"

"Oh, goody. Freak of nature, Aro Cruz," Jacob said dryly. "Lead the way."

"He's... eccentric," I offered lamely.

Jacob glared at me. "He's a weirdo."

"Possibly. But who am I to judge?"

We walked over to where Aro was standing with what I liked to refer to as his entourage. He was never seen without the same two women and three men. I wasn't entirely sure what his relationship with them was, and I didn't think I wanted to know. They could be lovers, they could be related, or they could be both.

_Now there was a disturbing thought._

Aro saw us approach and smiled welcomingly. I opened my mouth to talk to him, but was interrupted by the sound of my name being screeched from across the room.

I turned to see Jessica rushing over to us. Her black dress was so tight it hindered her ability to walk properly and made it look like a waddle instead. She looked ridiculous.

"Edward! Bella!"

"What the bloody hell?" I muttered.

"I forgot to call her about the stupid cat," Bella groaned. "Shit, I'll take care of it."

She left my side to intercept Jessica before she embarrassed herself in front of Aro. Unfortunately, I could still hear everything, which meant they could as well.

"Bella! Did you talk to your friend?"

She nodded. "I did. Angela said she doesn't have any space at Groomingdale's for her, but she'd be happy to take her home and keep her there for you instead."

"Like a cat sitter?" Jessica asked stupidly.

"I suppose."

Jessica stood there silently for a few beats. "Okay." She glanced back at me and ran her tongue over her lips. "Bella, your ma-"

"Jessica!" Bella snapped before she could say anything further. "I need your number so Angela can call you and give you directions to her house. Also, she needs to know what time you plan to bring Jasmine by."

"Oh." She snorted. "Right."

Bella jotted down Jessica's number on the back of her hand and then walked away before they could continue the conversation.

"That girl is missing a _ton _of brain cells," Jacob commented.

"She's completely vapid. She said that my gate tried to 'decelerate' Bella yesterday instead of 'decapitate'. It was absurd," I replied.

Jacob laughed. "That's funny."

Bella adjusted the strap going across her arm with an annoyed expression. "I swear I lose IQ points every time I'm near that girl."

"Then stay away from her," Jacob joked.

Aro walked over to us, surrounded by those same five people, and smiled disingenuously. "You keep interesting company, Edward."

"She's a neighbor," I explained. "Ran into a dilemma yesterday and required my assistance. Bella actually solved the problem."

"Oh?"

I nodded."Bella, this is Aro Cruz. He owns Volterra. Aro, Isabella Swan." I didn't bother to mention that Bella was my assistant. It seemed unimportant.

They exchanged pleasantries for a moment, and then Aro delved into a conversation with Jacob and me about our newest projects, ignoring Bella completely. This was not entirely surprising since Bella was what he would consider to be a commoner. At the moment, she was in no way connected to the film industry, so she wasn't worth talking to, but I would wager that this time next year, after she's known as Hollywood's highest paid actor's agent, he would be fawning over her.

We finally parted from Aro, and I introduced Bella to some of the more important people in the industry. People that she-as an agent-would need to be acutely aware of.

I hadn't been away from Tanya for long, but apparently, it was long enough for her. She came over to where we stood and threw her arms around my neck, pulling me to her so that she could kiss my cheek.

It took every ounce of control I had not to fling her off of me.

"Dude, the bitch left a lipstick mark on your cheek," Jacob said with a grin.

Tanya glared at Jacob before wiping my cheek off. I nearly flinched away from her touch. "I want to dance. Let's dance." She silently dared me to tell her no.

She knew I couldn't refuse in front of all these people without exposing us. If for no one else, I'd manage to get through the rest of the evening for Bella, so that she wasn't subjected to any unnecessary speculation.

I glanced over at Bella, who gave me a resigned smile in return, and I reluctantly led Tanya to where everyone was dancing.

I was unable to speak to Bella for the rest of the evening; Tanya made sure of that by continuously demanding we dance to each new song. I kept close watch of the time, desperate for midnight to come so I could drop this charade. It was excruciating to watch Bella with Jacob, laughing with him, and be forced to pretend that I didn't notice; that I didn't see the looks on the other men's faces when that beautiful laughter rang out or when she walked by with her flowing dress clinging to her gorgeous curves. I had to ignore the envious murmurings of the women who wondered who she was and why she was here. I wanted to let them all know that it was because of me Bella was here.

That she was mine.

"You are such a pain in the ass tonight, Edward," Tanya complained.

"I could say the same for you," I countered.

She looked aghast. "What did I do? I'm not the one who ditched their date for the help!"

"I ditched you because I happen to like Jacob and Bella's company," I shot back.

"And you don't like mine?"

"No."

She stomped on my foot with her heel. I hissed in a breath and glowered down at her. "Oops," she said insincerely.

"Careful. You'll blow our cover," I said tauntingly. "I know you're so worried about appearances, but I have to be honest, I'd love to have a huge row with you in front of all these people. Then, I wouldn't have to bother with the ridiculous lie anymore."

"I don't want to lie anymore, either." I blinked in shock. "I thought maybe we could actually give it a go."

I laughed, which made her furious. "Are you daft? You don't like me. I don't like you. Why would I ever consider it?"

"Combined we're unstoppable. Imagine if we were really together. We could rule this town. Our careers would be legendary."

"Tanya, find someone else to further your career. I'm retiring."

She fumed at this. "Oh, that's great. When were you going to bother telling me?"

"I wasn't. It's none of your concern."

Her eyes narrowed into slits. "It's that stupid little bitch, isn't it? What is it about that girl that everyone likes? She's nothing."

"Don't talk about her like that," I said menacingly. "You know nothing about her."

She laughed once. "She's got you fooled. She's after your fame. Your money. Mark my words, you're making the biggest mistake of your life by being with that gold digging whore," she said contemptuously.

My vision turned red, and I snapped. I suddenly didn't care that we were in the middle of a crowded room, or that she was my supposed love interest. There was no possible way I could let anyone talk about Bella like that.

Ever.

"She is not a mistake," I ground out. "I am in love with her."

Judging by the smug look on Tanya's face, I'd managed to walk right into whatever trap she'd set up for me.

"You're fucking her, aren't you?" Tanya screamed at me.

My eyes darted around the room. "Tanya, you're making a spectacle of yourself."

"Answer me!" she screeched.

"Stop it."

"How long?" she demanded. "How long have you been screwing your assistant?"

Everyone around us fell silent with the exception of one familiar gasp. I staggered back with the enormity of what had just happened. I'd destroyed any chance of Bella and I having any kind of peace in the near future by giving Tanya the upper hand and admitting my feelings for Bella to her.

I quickly led Tanya to the balcony, away from the prying eyes of the other guests. "What have you done?" I demanded.

She curled her lip back and hissed at me. "You don't fuck with me, Masen." She rifled through the little purse she'd had on her shoulder all night and produced a stack of pictures that were folded to fit inside. "I got these this morning, so I thought I'd take matters into my own hands."

I fumbled through photos of me at Bella's door last night and then getting into my car this morning, feeling my blood run cold. I'd been so excited last night that I didn't even bother to see if I'd been followed or listen to Bella's sensible warning when I knocked on her door. I'd let my emotions get the best of me-in public-something I vowed to never do.

"Who sent these?"

She shrugged. "I'm the victim here," she said, letting her eyes well with tears. "The woman who foolishly trusted Edward Masen with her heart while he went around screwing the help. Who knows who else you slept with while you were with me?"

"Tanya," I warned.

"While you and your little slut go around pretending to be Hollywood's newest, blissfully happy couple, I'll be making sure they all pity the unknowing ex and remember what a bastard you are. I will not let you ruin me over a coed," she said fiercely.

"Please, Tanya. Think about this," I begged. "You can be upset with me all you want; I deserve it. But don't do this to Bella. She did nothing to you."

She looked at me disdainfully. "No."

"You selfish bitch!" I yelled.

She smiled sweetly. "Have fun with damage control."

She spun around and stormed back into the main ballroom, leaving me to try to piece my career, my life, and possibly even my relationship with Bella back together.

I crouched down and pulled at my hair, despising myself for being so imprudent with my feelings and my actions when it came to Bella tonight. I'd wrecked everything with six measly words. I couldn't even stand to be around myself at the moment; I wouldn't blame Bella for being livid with me as well.

"Babe?" Bella called softly from the doors.

I glanced up at her but didn't respond.

She took one look at the tortured expression on my face and raced over to me. She crouched down beside me and ran her hand over my back comfortingly.

"What just happened?" she breathed anxiously.

I handed her the photos. "These were sent to Tanya this morning, so she decided to trick me into admitting that I'm in love with you. She plans to portray the woman scorned."

"What a fucking bitch!" she retorted. "I knew she was trying to figure us out the other day. I swear to God, next time, I _will _slap her."

I laughed at the fairly pleasant picture that last bit painted.

Bella flipped through the photos and threw them down in disgust. "She's shrewd. I'll give her that."

"I'll understand if you don't want to be seen with me for a while. If you want to distance yourself from the mess I've made," I told her thickly.

She actually laughed. "Why would I do that?"

"Self-preservation?"

She laughed again. "You think that I finally figured out what I wanted in life just to turn and run now? I couldn't leave you, even if I tried. You mean too much to me."

"Bella," I argued, "it's going to be bad. Things are going to be completely different from now on. I can't guarantee things will ever be easy for us again."

"Sure they will. We'll be old news before you know it," she said reassuringly.

She stood up and held her hand out to me. I was amazed at the strength she was displaying. She was completely unruffled by this, so accepting of her future and unlike everything she'd been before now.

I couldn't even begin to describe the relief and love I felt for her at that moment. For showing me what it felt like to be loved unconditionally and fully committed to, even through Bella's worst nightmare.

I took her hand and got to my feet, pulling her body to mine; I suddenly couldn't get close enough to her. It felt so surreal to hear the crowd counting down to midnight inside while Bella and I stood out here and tried to salvage what was left of our life together.

_"Happy New Year!"_ the crowd screamed.

"Happy New Year," Bella whispered. "We'll get through this. Together."

"Happy New Year," I murmured, bringing my hands up to cup her neck so that I could bring that glorious mouth to mine.

Fireworks sounded around us, but I was too lost in the electricity that droned around me as our tongues met and the wondrous feel of my chest trying to explode at any given second with the extent of my love for her.

I pulled back, breathless, and laid my forehead against hers. "I love you, Isabella."

"I love you, Edward," she returned.

"You're getting a bodyguard."

She pulled her head back so that she could see me clearly. "What? Uh-uh. I don't need to attract any more attention to myself than I already have."

"There's no arguing this, love. I need to know you're safe while attending classes or running errands. I can't risk anything happening to you because some crazed paparazzi tried to get a shot of you studying in the library or pumping a tank of gas."

"Edward, I'm not that interesting. They'll see that and back off."

"Humor me."

She heard my resolve and relented. "Fine. Hire a bodyguard. Sheesh."

"Thank you." I kissed the hollow under her ear. "Let's go. I've been dreaming of taking you out of that dress all evening."

She hummed. "What a good dream."

The reality would be even better.


	19. Chapter 19

**Thanks for the reviews!**

**LEMON later for those of you who need warning.**

**Thanks to Stratan for being a fuckawesome beta and getting this back in just a couple hours. **

**If you're not on Twitter, you should be... I posted a teaser over the weekend ;) I'll do it for BTSATM, too.**

**Everyone stop what you're doing...I have a blog! I am in the now. Ha! www(dot)Jenny0719(dot)blogspot(dot)com. I'll be posting teasers there and tying them into my Twitter account.**

**On with the fluffy fluff fluff (Did I mention there's fluff?)**

* * *

Chapter 19

**Bella**

I stood there watching Edward's body tense and his face crumple with fear, and I wanted to rip Tanya's throat out; not only for putting that seed of doubt in his mind about my reaction, but for using him and our relationship to further her career and improve the public's opinion of her.

_I swear the next time I see that woman..._

I made sure he was more than convinced that I was fine with all of this, even though the reality was that I wasn't. I was terrified of everyone's reaction when we stepped back into that room. We were no longer walking into that room as coworkers, but as two people in love. There was bound to be a shitload of preconceived notions about our relationship. I could almost hear the malicious thoughts churning through some of their minds; Edward was taking advantage of me, I was using him to further my own aspirations in becoming an actress, I was a gold-digging whore.

That last one shook my resolve, but somehow, I managed to push it aside because I'd promised Edward that no matter what, I'd stand by him. I was going to let my fears and inhibitions go and be myself in front of everyone. That included the part of me that was ridiculously, head over heels in love with the man walking next to me.

The guests were mingling around again, some of them drunkenly whispering to each other as we walked in, while others were completely oblivious to what had happened just a few minutes ago. Some simply stood and gawked openly at us.

I wanted to cower behind Edward and use his sinful body as a shield against the speculative eyes and self-righteous smirks, but I was determined not to let it get to me. I stood tall and kept a firm grasp of his hand as we walked through the sea of people. In a matter of seconds, I'd already managed to have enough of this bullshit.

"Wait," I said, tugging on Edward's hand.

He turned to me and gave me a questioning look.

"If we're going to go, let's go out with a bang," I said, grinning slyly.

His lips quirked. "What did you have in mind?"

"Dance with me."

"Why, Isabella Swan, just when I think I have you figured out, you do something else that's completely unexpected and further muddles my brain," he said playfully.

"Oh, yeah? What did I do this time?" I asked as we made our way to the center of the room.

"Honestly?" I nodded. "Well, at first I thought you'd run scared from being exposed like this. Then, I thought you'd want to escape out the back door to prevent from being seen by so many more people, possibly hide at my house for a few days while we licked our wounds and came up with a battle plan, so to speak."

I laughed and stepped into his embrace. "Not a chance. These people can go fuck off for all I care."

"That's what I've been saying all along, love."

"I know. I'm sorry."

He pulled me closer to him as we slowly danced to the music. "Don't be. We got here. I don't care how it came about, as long as you're here with me." His gaze darkened. "Holding you like this is doing quite a number on my pecker."

I giggled even though I was rocked with desire for him from that simple statement. "I can tell."

He let his hand slide down and pushed into me teasingly in response.

We spun around for a few minutes in silence before Edward spoke again.

"You know," he said softly. "Maybe it was supposed to happen like this."

"How do you mean?"

"We had to become what we are today before we could stand in front of the world together, unrepentantly. I don't think we could have managed it a month ago. We were still too new and learning about one another. Not to mention the Isabella Swan I knew then wouldn't have been able to ignore all the cameras around her."

I blinked a few times and then looked around me. Every single photographer had their camera focused on us.

I felt a little panicked as I blushed and tried to ignore the flashing white lights by concentrating on Edward's eyes. They were hypnotic, those depths of green, and before I knew it, I'd calmed considerably and was able to think again.

He was right. A month ago I'd have let that panicky feeling win and bolted out the door faster than he could've blinked, regardless of how I felt for him. I knew that I'd loved Edward since the moment I found out he was unlike the man that was portrayed in magazines, but it was nothing compared to the indescribable feeling I had for him now that I _truly_ knew him. I wouldn't have hesitated to leave it all behind. And for what? For a life of loneliness I couldn't even fathom going back to? How stupid was I?

"I'd have fought for you if you'd have run." His voice was low, but fierce.

I let my hands wind themselves in his hair. "Good. Because I would have been miserable without you."

"As I you." He opened his mouth and quickly shut it again, like he was scared to say what he was thinking.

"What?" I probed.

A tic worked in his jaw as he glanced around the room. "It can wait."

"Tell me." He stared at me stoically. "Please?"

"No."

I tried again, this time with a sad pout. "Pretty please?"

He exhaled in resignation and mumbled something under his breath that didn't sound very nice. "Don't slap me."

I laughed. "Why would I want to do that?" He stared at me seriously. "All right, all right, I won't slap you."

"Remember those words, love." He took a deep breath and gathered himself. "I've not given much thought to how I'd do this, but after everything tonight, it feels like it should be now. Tonight."

"What are you talking about?"

"I want to marry you," he said quietly.

"Well, okay," I responded lamely.

He shook his head and cleared his throat nervously. "No, I'm proposing. And doing horribly. Christ, I can get on a stage and flawlessly give an acceptance speech in front of millions of people, but I can't ask my girlfriend to marry me without sounding like a complete git."

I stopped moving and stared at him in something like shell-shocked silence. "Here? _Now_?"

"I told you it could wait, but you didn't listen. I'd have much rather done this when we got home."

He had me there.

"But... I-I mean," I stammered.

"Don't make me get down on one knee in front of all these people." His eyes flashed wickedly.

"You wouldn't."

"I indeed would."

My eyes narrowed. "Are you blackmailing me into marrying you?"

"Perhaps. I've wagered the odds, and this route seems best, given your personality quirks."

"You shameless-"

He cut me off with a kiss. It was hot and fiery, causing my insides to liquefy. I relented under his strong hand and silently gave my answer. I'd marry him tomorrow at the court house if he wanted me to.

He pulled back when we ran out of air. "Is that a yes?"

"Yes," I breathed.

His face broke out into an exuberant smile, and I quickly found my own expression matching it.

"Holy mother of God," I said as it dawned on me. "I'm engaged." A thrill rushed through me with the words.

"You are. Regret it yet?"

I rolled my eyes. "Nope," I said lightly.

"Thank the Lord for that."

I laughed and rested my head on his chest as we continued to dance. I felt him tighten his hold on me and just reveled in the moment. Even though I could feel the eyes boring into my back, no one knew what had just taken place between us. In the midst of the crowd, it was our own personal moment.

And it was unlike anything I'd ever dreamed of. I'd been a blind fool before to think that I didn't want this.

The song ended and we broke apart, but never lost contact with each other as we searched the room for Jacob. We found him sitting at the bar with a gorgeous blond and gave him a quick wave as we left.

"Did you drive the Bond car?" I asked Edward, almost skipping out the door.

He grinned widely. "I did."

"Can I drive it?"

He gave my feet a funny look as we started down the steps. "You want to drive my car?"

"Oh," I said as I realized I had these ridiculously high heels on. "Might not be the best idea."

"No, it-"

He was cut off by a surge of noise coming from the press waiting outside. I stopped abruptly at the sound and watched as we were instantly swarmed, knowing I had that "deer in headlights" look about me. I thought we'd have been able to get back to Edward's before this started.

Obviously, I was wrong.

Camera after camera was shoved in our faces, and shouts rang in my ears. Edward threw his arm around me protectively and brought me into his side while he used his other hand to push through the crowd. He was shouting at them-somehow pleasantly-and answering the questions that I couldn't even begin to comprehend all with what looked to be a genuine smile on his face.

"How can you understand them?" I asked as we waited for the valet to come around with the car.

"Years of practice." He smirked. "You'll get used to it."

"I don't think I want to."

He laughed once and kissed my forehead, causing the entire press line to go wild.

"Holy shit!" I exclaimed against the roar in my head.

He grimaced. "It's absurd, is it not?"

"This is how you go out every day?" I was screaming just to talk to him.

"Not always. It's much worse at the moment because of you."

"Oh, well, thanks," I said dryly.

"Anytime, love." He gazed down at me. "Well, Cinderella. The clock has struck midnight and you're wretched step-sister has ratted you out. What do you do?" He was joking, but there was an air of anxiety about him that made me take his question seriously.

I reached up, ignoring the madness around me, and brushed my thumb over Edward's stubbly jaw. "I stay with the prince," I said reassuringly. "I told you this."

He grabbed my hand and placed kisses on my fingers. "I know. It's hard not to worry, though."

I bit down on my lip so that it didn't tremble with the tears I wanted to cry. I'd really screwed this up if Edward couldn't even enjoy the fact that we were engaged without worrying that I was going to leave him.

I pulled him down so that I could whisper in his ear. "We're engaged. I wouldn't have said yes if I didn't think I could handle it."

He kissed the tip of my nose and flashed me a lopsided smile. "You should say that all the time now. I love the way it rolls off your tongue."

"Engaged," I whispered back. "It does sound nice," I laughed. "Say it back."

"Engaged."

I wiggled in his arms, unable to keep still. "I like it. I want to keep hearing it for a long time."

"Oh, no you don't," he laughed. "We're not going to be one of those couples who's engaged for years before they finally walk down the aisle."

"I wasn't planning on it."

"Good."

The valet came to the curb with the car, and Edward helped me through the mass of reaching arms and into the passenger's seat. He turned and chatted amiably with the reporters as he slowly made his way to the driver's side.

He opened the door and called back to one of the reporters. "It's not what it seems, Eric, trust me."

I peered out the window to see a young, black-haired man grinning back at him. "It seems like you cheated on your gorgeous, insanely famous girlfriend with your just as gorgeous, college student assistant."

"I cheated on no one."

He dropped down into the seat and slammed the door shut. He ran his hand through his hair and glanced out the windshield.

"Tanya's already spread her lies," he said shortly.

I didn't feel the need to comment. There wasn't really anything I could say to make the situation any better, so I continued to watch the reporters hover around the car.

Edward pulled away from the curb, and I spotted James almost lurking in the shadows with a smug look on his face.

"Edward, look!" I pointed James out.

"Eliot," Edward fumed. "He must've been the one who followed me last night." He threw the car into second gear roughly and sped down the road. "Where was the bastard hiding? How did he know I'd be leaving my house? Hell,_ I_ didn't even know I was going to leave my house."

I reached over and ran my finger over his clenched hand. "It doesn't matter, does it?"

He threw me a sideways look. "I suppose not."

His phone started buzzing in his pocket. He pulled it out and laughed loudly.

"You answer it, love," he said, passing the phone over to me.

"Um, okay," I mumbled uncertainly.

I hit the green button and put the phone to my ear. "Hello?"

"Congratulations!" Alice shouted in my ear.

"Ah, Alice, damn it, give a girl some warning," I groaned.

She laughed just as Edward did. "Put it on speaker."

I did as I was told. "Okay."

"Why didn't you tell me you were going to propose tonight, Edward?" she chided.

"I wasn't planning to, Alice. It just sort of... happened."

"Oh, that's really romantic. Did our mother teach you _nothing_?"

"Stop it," I demanded lightly. "It was perfect. I like the sweet gestures and all, but this was very us. Dysfunctional."

Edward scoffed. "We're not dysfunctional. _You're_ dysfunctional."

"I'm not dysfunctional! Well, not so much anymore," I amended, making Edward laugh.

"Enough, you two," Alice interrupted. "How bad was Tanya?"

"You_ knew_?" I asked in disbelief. "Why didn't you give us some warning?"

"Um, possibly because I didn't want my head chewed off by my brother for interfering," she countered.

I glared at Edward.

"What?" he asked innocently. "I didn't say a word. She assumed."

"Whatever, Edward. So how bad was it?" she asked again.

"Well, I was given a thorough introduction of how Edward lives his daily life tonight. And I'm sure my face is being splashed all over the internet as we speak as his newest 'toy'," I said in annoyance.

"It'll get easier, I promise. You two just need to get through this first bit."

"Really?" I asked hopefully.

"Um-hm. I think everyone will fall in love with you, just as my brother did."

I flushed.

"Stop blushing, Bella," she chided.

Of course my face got even hotter.

"Alice, don't say anything to Mum. All right?"

"If you promise to call her tomorrow, I won't."

"Alice," he replied sternly. "Don't you dare."

She giggled. "Call her tomorrow or else I might be forced to let it slip. Bye!"

She hung up before either of us could say anything back.

"Well, I guess you're calling your parents tomorrow and telling them."

Edward grinned. "It's not like I wasn't going to anyway. What about you?"

"Um, I'll call Charlie, but I think I'll wait on Reneé," I said hesitantly.

He turned his head briefly to see my face. "Why?"

"I don't know if she'll approve of me getting married so young," I told him honestly.

"Do you care what she thinks?"

"Unfortunately, yes," I sighed. "She's my mother."

He stopped at a light and leaned over the console so that he could place a tender kiss on my lips. "If she's not just as happy as we are, then she's a bigger idiot than I thought."

"You think my mom's an idiot?" I laughed.

He looked uncomfortable. "Erm, I plead the Fifth. This is America, and I do have that right, having dual citizenship and all."

I sobered enough to speak. "Good answer, baby."

* * *

**Edward**

_I'm getting married._

I couldn't believe that the enamoring creature sitting in the passenger's seat actually wanted to commit herself to me. My assumptions after Tanya's scene had been nothing like the reality. Where I thought I'd go home miserable and alone, I was actually going home with my fiancée.

It was mind boggling.

I wasn't going to rush Bella into marriage, but I wasn't entirely sure how long I could wait to make her my wife. This was something I'd always wanted and to have it so close within my grasp was almost unbearable. I wanted to see her in her white gown with her father by her side and listen to my mother's weeping in the background as we said our vows. I wanted our relationship to be just as legally binding as it was emotionally; the world would know before the year was over that Isabella Swan had managed to do what no one else could-capture my heart. I would forever be hers so long as she would have me.

I could possibly wait until she graduated before I started pressing for a date. I'd never been so eager for anything in all my life. Not even the seconds-long wait before they announced my first Oscar win could compare to this. I was tingling with anticipation already while acutely aware that I needed to get a firm grip on reality before I frightened Bella away.

I concentrated on the road instead of the overwhelming joy I was feeling and noticed we were being followed. I opened my mouth to tell Bella, but one quick glance at her peaceful expression was enough to snap it shut again. I wasn't going to ruin the moment with something that really wasn't all that important. It wasn't like they could come near the house, so why bother?

I pulled into the drive and quickly punched the security code into the gate while the van that had been following us idled in the street. A cursory glance told me that it was closer than lawfully allowed, but I was in such a good mood, I let it pass.

I parked the car in the garage and quickly got out, heading Bella off at the door. One look at her exquisite form, and I suddenly felt like I was being burned alive.

I grabbed her face and kissed her fiercely, drinking in the moan that escaped her throat while I worked to make her feel the blinding ache that was currently raging through me.

Her hands shot up to my neck and nimbly opened my tie, throwing it haphazardly to the ground. She opened the collar of my shirt and then tugged, exposing my torso to her while buttons scattered on the floor with a light plinking sound.

Her fingers explored my body, causing a shiver to rip through me with the tingle of her touch. I fisted her dress in my hands and began shoving the fabric out of the way, but no amount of pulling seemed to work.

"Where are you?" I breathed in frustration.

Her giggle was cut off by a groan as soon as I finally found her. I skimmed over her clit and felt her jerk in my arms. "Oh, fuck."

"There you are," I said smugly.

I ripped those tiny white knickers away from her body-it was only fair that I should destroy something of hers as she did mine-so that I could fully explore her. My fingers were met with that glorious wetness in between her thighs, and my vision blurred with the need to consume her. I'd never known what it felt like to truly desire a woman until Bella, but even this was unprecedented.

I backed her up to the car and pushed her down so that I could see her. Her cheeks were beautifully flushed, and her chest heaved with her labored breaths. I lifted her leg and draped it over my shoulder while I slowly grazed my fingers down the smooth expanse of her skin, followed immediately by my mouth until I got to my destination.

I wanted to taste her.

With a slow, deliberate stroke of my tongue, Bella's back arched away from the car and she screamed out incoherently. I used my fingers to heighten the pleasure for her and before I knew it, she was lost in the throes of an orgasm on the hood of my car.

It was the most erotic thing I'd ever witnessed in my life.

She pushed herself up off the car and launched her body toward me. Her mouth found mine and our hands were reaching and grabbing for every part of flesh we could find as we clumsily made our way back to the door.

"Mmm," I mumbled against her mouth. "I need to get the door, love."

"Fuck the door," she gasped. "You could have kept me on the car."

I reached for the knob and twisted while my other hand grabbed Bella's arse so that I could grind my hips into hers. "I'm not fucking you for the first time as my fiancée on the hood of my car. It should be in the house."

"The house?"

I threw the door open and pushed her through the threshold just as her hands finally laid waste to my trousers. "I don't think I can make it to the bed," I said thickly.

She stroked me once, and I went blind. "No?"

"No," I snarled.

Something ripped as I lowered us to the floor, but neither of us were concerned with the sound. I growled with the frustration of having to search through the yards of fabric for her again but was rewarded with the feel of heat against me when I finally pushed it all aside.

I quickly sank into her. "Jesus fucking God," she cursed.

I moaned in agreement as I began thrusting forcefully into her. Her hips came up off the ground to meet my strokes as we rushed to find release together.

She did something with her body that caused me to go deeper while exposing her neck to me. I nibbled and sucked on the delicate skin there, listening to her breathy moans in my ear.

"Edward, I-"

"Yes," I managed to choke out. I could feel my impending climax all the way to my bones.

She started to come first, shattering any shred of control I had left. I drove into her one final time and let myself follow into what seemed like stunned oblivion.

All the strength left my body, and I collapsed on top of her. My heart hammered in my chest and I could barely breathe, but I managed to shift us so that I could cup her face and kiss her.

"I think I ruined your dress," I said apologetically.

She shrugged once. "You bought it."

I chuckled. "I'd forgotten."

Now that we were finally regaining control of our senses, we both heard Samson's heavy panting echoing throughout the room. We stared at each other in shock, before we burst out laughing and looked to where he was sitting, dripping slobber all over the floor.

He let out an impatient groan and trotted over to us. He nudged me with his head, whining, and then licked the side of Bella's face.

She let out a disgusted yelp and wiped at her cheek. "That's just wrong."

"He needs to go out. I'll take care of it." I kissed her temple and stiffly got up. "I'm too old for that."

She giggled and sat up. "Then I guess that makes me old, too, because my back is killing me."

I laughed once in appreciation and went to open the door for Samson, staying behind it cautiously. Just because the paparazzi were not to take photos on private property, didn't always stop them.

The last thing either of us needed in the midst of all this chaos was a naked photo of me all over the internet tomorrow morning...

Yeah, I could definitely do without that.

* * *

I lay with Bella in bed, tracing lazy patterns over her skin carefully so that I didn't wake her. Even though it was the next morning, I was still in that post-coital bliss after I'd laid her down and properly made love to her the second time, like I should have to begin with. I'd taken care with her and held her like she was something extremely fragile, because in my eyes, she was. The thought of something happening to her was excruciating. Even though I'd worried over her safety and health since the day I realized she was becoming more to me than just an employee, now the anxiety and stress was almost burdening. She was on display for the world because of me, and there were some people out there who would stop at nothing to get a quote or a picture of the woman I loved.

There was an endless list of people I needed to contact today. My publicist and most definitely a security company were top priority, after my parents. I was going to make good on my promise of a bodyguard.

I toyed with the black box that held what was now Bella's ring while she slept. I flipped it open with my thumb and pulled the tiny ring out. I sadly stared down at the ring that had sat on my mother's hand for twenty years, but pushed the feeling away. My mother would have wanted Bella to have this. I only wished I could have seen her face when I told her that we were getting married. She'd have found something witty to say in the middle of her Esme-like screams.

The ring wasn't much really, in terms of what was available today, but I thought it suited Bella perfectly. It was platinum with a round two-carat stone in the center, with three smaller round diamonds set into the band on each side. My father had worked long hours to afford this ring, as well as the matching band that was still in my safe. I hoped I was honoring all that hard work by giving it to Bella instead of buying something new.

I unwound myself from Bella and motioned for Samson to follow me down the stairs. I let him out and began working to make Bella breakfast in bed. I was going to spoil her this morning with strawberry French toast and mimosas-something I'd mentioned our first morning together.

I grabbed the Blackberry off the counter and called Zafrina, my publicist.

"Zafrina Torres," she said pleasantly.

"Z, it's Edward."

"Edward!" she exclaimed in her thick accent. "God, you've gotten yourself in quite a mess, haven't you? Your little stunt last night is all over the internet. People are blogging left and right about you and this... Miss Swan. Tell me, are you as serious with her as you look?"

"What are you talking about?"

"There's a photo of you with this girl outside Volterra last night," she explained. "You're laughing and looking down at her. In fifteen years, I've never seen you look at anyone that way before."

"I love her," I said, stirring the strawberries and sugar. "And I'm marrying her."

"Okay," she answered. "We need to get together. I can put some sort of statement out today to get you through the weekend, but we need to come up with a game plan. I need to meet with your fiancée as well so I can get a feel for her personality and what angle we can work best."

"That's what I pay you for."

She laughed softly. "Are you busy Monday?"

"Bella starts class, but no. I don't have anything important planned."

She groaned. "Oh, the college student. Tanya's camp is really going at that part of the story."

"Great," I muttered.

"It's not a problem. We'll fix this. I'll see you Monday morning. Say sevenish?"

"That should be fine. It'll give Bella enough time to get to class at nine."

I hung up and focused on starting the toast.

It wasn't long before I was drizzling the strawberry compote over the toast and tying the ring to her flute. I placed the teapot and a couple of cups next to our breakfast and took the tray upstairs.

I opened the door to see Bella stirring. I put the tray next to her and smiled. "Did you sleep well?"

"Um-hm." She yawned. "What's all this?"

"Remember that morning in Forks when I told you that I wanted to spoil you with something clichéd like mimosas and roses?"

She sat up and pulled the sheet over her. "Yeah."

"You have everything but the roses."

She laughed.

I cut a sliver of toast and fed her a bite with a slice of strawberry. "This is really good," she mumbled.

"Is it?"

She groaned and rolled her eyes, nodding furiously. "Try some."

"All right." I took a bite and let one side of my lips pull up. "I rock."

"You rock?" She giggled. "Wow."

I shrugged. "I thought I'd try it out. Doesn't really work with the accent."

"It was cute," she argued, grinning. "You rock."

"As do you."

"Thanks, babe."

I nodded. "I called Zafrina earlier," I told her quietly.

"Zafrina?" she asked.

"My publicist."

"Oh, right. You know too many girls for me to keep track of their roles in your life."

I gave her a droll stare. "She wants to meet you Monday morning."

Her brows knit. "Really? Why?"

"She'll have a list of things you need to remember when going out in public. She's very meticulous with me. It's why I've never thought to go to another firm."

She shifted so that she was face to face with me. "You mean she'll teach me how to be all prim and proper and stuff?"

I chuckled. "Most definitely not. I love you, just as you are. Changing you would be all sorts of wrong. She'll merely teach you to know when it's acceptable to speak freely and when you need to put up your guard and give them a generic answer."

"Hmm." She gazed at me pensively. "You trust her?"

"Yes," I answered simply.

"Okay."

"Okay," I repeated.

I shifted nervously as she took a sip of her mimosa. The ring dangled on the red ribbon I'd tied it to and caught her attention. She stared at the ring for a moment like it was going to reach out and bite her, before her eyes drifted to me.

"What's this?"

"A ring," I said lightly.

"I have a ring?" She looked at me incredulously. "Since when?"

"Since the day I met you," I said with a smirk. "It's been sitting in the safe waiting for you for nearly sixteen years."

The importance of that statement didn't elude her. "What?" she asked with wide eyes. "Edward, I can't-"

I cut her off with my mouth, kissing her with as much feeling as I could muster. "You can, and you will."

I pulled at one end of the ribbon, releasing the ring, and held it up in between my thumb and index finger and watched her eyes brim with tears.

"I, erm," I ran my free hand through my hair, "I want to do this right since I was so horrible about it before."

"Edward, just do it before I start crying."

I chuckled and slipped the ring on her finger. It fit perfectly, solidifying that it was meant for her. "It fits."

"Yeah," she said thickly.

"Isabella, words can't describe the way you make me feel. I love everything you do and everything you are, from the foul language you use to the way your cheeks heat up in times of awkwardness or embarrassment. I love the way you melt in my arms and the way your kisses taste. I love that you trip over air and how incredibly funny you are at times. I even love that you hate my dog."

She giggled through her tears.

"I've wanted to find someone I could spend the rest of my life with, and after years of searching for her, you managed to walk into my life and destroy every preconceived notion I might have had about love and marriage and family, just by being who you are. I want the world to know how impossibly bound I am to you. I want to make that fairy tale you lost as a child a reality and create a life with you that surpasses either of our expectations and dreams."

"I think we should just focus on creating life. Or go through the motions, anyway," she sniffled teasingly.

"We can work on that as well," I said with a crooked smile. "Marry me and make me happier than any other bloke on the planet?"

"Yes."

I leaned over the tray and kissed her, taking my time to explore her mouth. With a final quick kiss, I pulled back to see her smirking at me.

"Can we, uh, move all this?" she said, waving her finger at the tray. "Because I'd like to do that whole creating-life-motion-thing now."

I laughed. "It doesn't work if you're using birth control," I said as I moved the tray to the floor.

She yanked me down so that I was lying on top of her. "Details, details," she said flippantly.

"A very important detail," I murmured.

"Yes, but it does nothing to take away from how incredible it feels. So that detail can be overlooked."

I rolled her over, surprising her and making her squeal. "For now."

She bent down and kissed my jaw sweetly. "For now."


	20. Chapter 20

**Thanks for the reviews and the adds! The huge response I got to the proposal (on and off Twitter/FFn) was amazing!**

**If you didn't see it, I posted a teaser for this Sat night... Just sayin ;) I also posted a teaser on The Fictionators blog for Teaser Mondays. So if you're not following them, you should. Lots of good stuff on that site.**

**There's a bit of lemonade in this chapter. Lemon rind, maybe? *shrugs* It's there. But not like last chapter. **

**If you're wondering, I still haven't gotten to the reason for the title. It's a slow build...**

**BtSatM readers-- It's coming, I promise. I'm taking Q's idea about posting the Laurent capture as an outtake for Fandom Gives Back so I'm kinda blocked with the new direction. One of these days I'll get unclogged.**

**Thanks to Stratan for beta'ing this. And thanks to Kaylinas for verifying Carlisle and Esme's dialogue.**

* * *

Chapter 20

**Edward**

We'd spent the morning in bed, too lazy after all that sex to do anything other than shower, really. I'd finally grown tired of just laying and doing nothing and decided it was time to start spreading the good news. I pulled my laptop out of its bag and accessed Skype so that I could see Carlisle and Esme's faces when we told them about our engagement.

I kept close watch of Bella out of the corner of my eye while I was waiting for the laptop to boot up. She looked anxious, and was bouncing around and twisting her ring on her finger as she waited. I couldn't imagine the reason for her sudden shift in demeanor. She'd been so excitable earlier after I'd proposed for the second time, so now I was obviously tormenting myself about the reason why.

I pushed the worry away and picked up my mobile. I sent a message to Carlisle's mobile simply telling him to log in to Skype, because I was going to ring and then turned to Bella with a beaming smile.

"Ready?"

"Nope."

"Why not?" I questioned as I looked at the clock. A slow grin spread across my face. "It's just past seven in London. They'll be sitting down to eat."

She looked at me curiously. "You sound sure."

"I am. They're creatures of habit. Won't it be fun to interrupt their dinner for this?"

"I guess," she mumbled.

"My God, Bella, you act like I'm dragging you to your execution," I said in disgust.

"I'm sorry." She swallowed hard. "Nerves."

I pushed the laptop away and pulled her down on the bed with me. "Because?" I demanded. It seemed absurd that she would be nervous about telling my parents--who loved her dearly--that we were getting married.

She shrugged and cast her eyes down, like she was ashamed of admitting what was bothering her.

"They don't think like your mother. They'll act very much like Alice did. I promise," I said softly.

She relaxed a little but was still jittery. Her foot shook next to my knee, and I watched her chew on her lip. A sudden, crushing thought dawned on me, and I had to force myself not to latch onto Bella in response. As it was, my fingers involuntarily curled against her skin, trying to unconsciously claim her in some way.

What if she'd changed her mind?

I nearly groaned aloud. There was no way I was going to let her call it off a mere thirteen hours after she'd said yes. She'd never get rid of me now; I'd never allow it. I tended to tease and rib her about her obstinacy, but I was just as stubborn.

She was mine. Forever.

But I knew that was unrealistic. I'd give her anything she wanted, even if it meant a life without me.

The thought was like a knife ripping its way through my heart.

"Bella," I paused, unsure if I could bear the answer, "you aren't having second thoughts, are you?" I asked tentatively.

She jerked back and stared at me with a horrified expression. "What?" she shouted. "NO! God, no!"

My brow quirked with her adamancy. My girl was still in there. Thank God. "All right," I said slowly.

She grabbed my face with her hands. "Can you feel how sweaty my palms are?" I nodded once. "I'm happy, Edward. I just don't want to be told that I'm too young and stupid for marrying you, and that it's a mistake and have them ask if you knocked me up and-"

"Easy, love," I interjected soothingly.

"Sorry," she muttered.

I laughed and let my thumb move gently over her shoulder. "You'll see. Their reactions will be good," I said confidently.

She nodded, but still didn't look appeased.

"Bella, what else is bothering you? You're worrying me a bit," I told her honestly.

"I want to tell my mom, but I don't know how. I'm tired of secrets, but she's just so... weird," she replied. "And hormonal."

"I'll be right here." I picked her chin up so that I could see her properly. "I'll even tell her, if you'd like."

Her lips twitched. "Don't tempt me."

I leaned in to kiss her with a smile. "I'll explain to her that I couldn't wait another moment..."

She parted her lips with mine so that I could sweep my tongue over hers.

"...because her daughter is entirely too enrapturing for her own good. She's smart and witty and confident--most of the time." Bella giggled against my mouth. "There'll never be a dull moment in my life again, and no one could possibly love her more than I do."

"She'll tell you that you're a fucking dumbass."

"Surely not. I don't think even _your _mother has your colorful vocabulary."

She snorted and shook her head. "No."

She pulled back, and I frowned. "Where are you going? I wasn't finished."

Her eyes darted down to my mouth while a playful smile crossed her face... and then she attacked me. Her hand came up and tugged at my hair while her greedy mouth worked with mine. Every part of me responded to her kiss, and I held her against me and kissed her just as hungrily.

The program started ringing, and I reached out across her body to answer it blindly. I fumbled with the buttons and finally heard Carlisle's laughter.

"I'll call you back," I mumbled, trying to click the web cam off. "Sod it. Dad, turn yours off."

Bella pushed me off of her and glared at me all while an intense blush spread across her cheeks.

"I know you didn't call me to watch you snog your girlfriend," Carlisle chuckled.

"No."

Bella reached up and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, causing Esme to gasp.

"Carlisle! Look! They're getting married!" she shrieked.

"Erm... That was what I was going to call about," I said awkwardly.

"Surprise?" Bella added sheepishly.

"It is!" Esme laughed and bounced up and down ecstatically. "Congratulations!"

Carlisle mumbled around his food.

"What, Dad? I didn't quite catch that through your mastication," I joked.

He rolled his eyes. "Well, you were the one who called during dinner. I simply said the same thing as your mother."

"Thank you."

"The ring fits?" Esme asked Bella.

She nodded. "It fits really well, actually."

"I knew it would," Esme responded in pleasure. "So when are you planning to get married? Please don't tell me next year, your sister's already said she'd like to get married next fall. Two weddings in one year..." She shuddered dramatically.

"We hadn't discussed it, actually." I glanced at Bella. "Did you have anything in mind, love?"

Bella bit her lip. "What about this summer? My lease is up in June, and I don't want anything big..." She trailed off.

I stared at her in disbelief. I was almost certain she'd make me wait until she'd finished graduate school. "You want to so soon?"

"Well, yeah. I mean, there's no point in waiting." She furrowed her brows. "Why, do you not want to?"

"No. I'd marry you right now if I didn't mind listening to my mother and sister's complaints afterward."

"Well, okay then." She grinned. "We'll get married this summer."

"Where?" Esme inquired.

"Mum, please. Let us have this conversation on our own first," I chuckled.

"Very well," she huffed. "Have you told Alice?"

"Do you really think he needed to?"Bella asked in amusement.

Esme laughed. "No, I suppose not."

We chatted with my parents for over an hour, talking about the ball, Tanya, and our plans to counteract the damage that woman had managed to cause in a matter of minutes. Bella talked to them about her upcoming classes, while I told them about promotional photo shoots I had coming up for Rogue and that I'd been contacted by _GQ_ recently about appearing on an upcoming cover.

"I think it might be perfect to talk about Bella then. I haven't discussed it with Zafrina yet, but knowing her, she'll want us to lay low for the next few months and coincide everything with the film's release. She's quite savvy, that girl."

Bella laughed, but I could see the doubt in her eyes. "So I'm still going to be Edward Masen's secret girlfriend until May."

I shook my head. "You're no longer a secret, but no matter what Zafrina suggests, I don't plan to flaunt our relationship. It's simply not something I'd ever be interested in doing, and you'll be much safer because of it."

"But I'll have a stinkin' bodyguard," she groaned. "How much safer can I be?"

"Listen to him, dear," Esme chimed in. "He knows what he's doing. Years of experience have taught him that you can never be too careful with journalists. Their job is to dig up the dirt, so to speak, and most will stop at nothing if they've an ounce of suspicion about a person."

"Thank you, Mum," I said appreciatively.

Bella rolled her eyes. "Fine. I trust you. Just don't make me regret it."

"Not a chance, love."

After we disconnected, I wrapped myself around Bella and kissed her, letting my lips linger over hers. "That wasn't so bad, now was it?"

"No," she admitted reluctantly. "But we've not called anyone on my side of the family yet."

I shrugged nonchalantly. "We can do that now."

"No, I should go home."

I shook my head. "You're going nowhere. I haven't decided I'm ready to let you leave yet, and since your car is at your flat, you're at my mercy."

"Edward," she groaned.

"Bella," I mocked.

"How long are you expecting me to stay?"

"The weekend," I answered simply.

Her eyes widened. "But I have class Monday. I need to get back home and get all my shit ready."

"Precisely." Her brows knit, so I explained further. "Reality begins again on Monday. I just want a couple of days of you to myself."

"You just had two weeks of me here over break," she countered with a grin.

"You're my fiancée. You should know by now that I could spend every second of every day with you and it still wouldn't be enough."

Her grin widened. "Okay. I'll stay."

I blinked. "Well, that was easier than I'd thought it would be."

She laughed and brought her hand up to my face. "Surely you didn't think I'd argue with you."

"I did. You so often do, I've grown accustomed to pleading and wheedling to get my way."

"You don't always do that."

I grinned wickedly, wanting very much to finish what my parents had interrupted earlier. "You're right. Sometimes I take what I want. Like now."

I listened to her giggle as I yanked the t-shirt she was wearing over her head, only to hear it abruptly cut off when I drew her breast in my mouth. I let my hands roam her body while my mouth did the same, worshipping every inch of her as I continued to slowly bring her toward release.

We undressed and I slid into her, dragging my mouth over her shoulder, very aware how nearly obsessed I was with the woman who's limbs were wrapped around me. Nothing mattered to me like it did before. The only thing I could see when I closed my eyes was Bella's beautiful face and ethereal body. I'd been irrevocably altered by this one phenomenal being that was brought into my life.

Simply stated, to be parted from her now would cause the piece of me that Bella had sparked to life to die.

"I could spend the rest of my life in bed with you like this," I murmured against her skin. "You feel incredible."

She moaned and shifted on top of me as her hands skimmed over my back. "You're insatiable, Masen."

I brought her body impossibly closer to mine. "Never. Not once until you."

She stared down at me incredulously. "Never?" she breathed, biting her lip.

"I told you; I was waiting for you. If you ever stopped loving me-" I broke off, unable to finish.

She shook her head and kissed me with a ferocity I couldn't begin to comprehend. "Never," she repeated. "You own me."

I threw my head back and groaned as her words pushed me over the edge. She came with me, clinging to me and breathing harshly in my ear as our bodies were shocked by the emotions our love making spurred.

I fisted my hand in her hair and brought her mouth to mine. "No, my love. _You _own _me_." _Body and soul._

I wasn't sure how long we sat there intertwined like we were before Bella finally sighed and moved off me. She padded off to the bathroom, stunning me by patting Samson's sleeping form in the chair on her way by, and came back with her mobile next to her ear.

She sat next to me and spoke to Charlie briefly, telling him about the engagement and even going so far as to tell him we were planning to get married over the summer. The surprise of his nonchalant reaction was evident in her voice as she continued to talk to him. I wasn't exactly sure how she expected him to react, but I was extremely grateful that he'd been able to see something between us on Thanksgiving, and had, in a way ,resigned himself to the fact that we were... inseparable.

He said something, and Bella's face scrunched up with laughter. "Yeah, well, you and Reneé aside, Edward's given me a better perspective on marriage."

Whatever he said next made her blush. I smiled a little and ran my index finger along the crimson hue. "Dad," she chastised. "Give me a break."

They spoke for a few minutes longer before finally ending the conversation.

"Charlie's okay with it," she said as she hung up.

"Of course he is," I said with a cocky, crooked grin. She laughed until she heard my next words. "Call your mum."

She instantly shook her head. "No."

"Isabella. Call your mother," I said firmly.

"No," she said again.

"Then I will." I scrolled through the list of contacts on my mobile until I found Reneé's information. With a push of a few buttons, the ring echoed throughout the quiet room.

"How do you have my mother's phone number?" she hissed.

"I have my ways," I said with a smirk. "You don't think I let you come for an interview without doing some sort of background check on you, do you?"

Her mouth opened and shut itself again before she finally could speak. "I'd always wondered why someone who made their assistant check ID's at the gate hired me without a second thought."

"I knew you weren't some criminal. Though stalker, I had to take my chances with."

She laughed again, just as Reneé's voice filtered through the mobile.

"Reneé, it's Edward. How are you?" I asked pleasantly.

"I'm great!" she said excitedly. "How are you?"

"Brilliant. And that little boy? I assume he's well, also?"

She giggled. "He is. What on earth are you calling me about?"

"Well," I replied. "Bella and I have some news."

"She's pregnant!"

"Err, no." I ran my hand through my hair and rolled my eyes at Bella's smug look.

"Oh." She sounded confused. "Then what is it?"

I elbowed Bella, silently urging her to finally speak. "Hi, Reneé," she said timidly.

"Hey, sis. How's the break going?"

"It's fine." She didn't elaborate.

I sighed heavily and took it upon myself to explain the reason why I'd called since Bella was so clearly not going to do it. "I proposed to Bella last night, and thankfully, she said yes."

Silence.

"Reneé?" Bella asked nervously.

"What?" She cleared her throat once. "Did you tell your father?"

Bella smiled with the thought of Charlie's reaction. "I did. He said that he thought I was too young, but that he'd never really seen me happy until Edward came along. And I even got a congratulations out of him."

Her sharp intake of breath alerted me to her change in demeanor.

"Well, you are too young. Did you learn nothing from your father and me?" she snapped.

"I learned what not to do in a marriage, if that's what you mean," Bella shot back.

"You have your entire life ahead of you! Why rush this? It'll only wind up in divorce!" Reneé cried in frustration.

"I have no intention of _ever_ divorcing your daughter, Reneé," I said tersely. The woman was mad.

"You may not have the intention, but when my daughter realizes that she's rushed into something she wasn't prepared for, you'll have no choice in the matter."

"I'm not you!" Bella screamed. "I'm nothing like you. I love this man, and I want to have a family with him. You never wanted me; I was always a burden to your hippie, free-spirited lifestyle. The fact that you're actually _wanting_ to be a parent to my brother is almost incomprehensible to me. Why can't you just be happy for me?"

"You're only twenty-one! Why can't you wait until you're thirty to marry Edward, if he's still around?" Reneé argued. It didn't escape me that she didn't refute Bella's claim of not wanting her, which was absurd. How could _anyone_ not want her?

"Because, I will not make him wait until he's fifty to get married just because you want me to. I'm tired of living my life to appease everyone else. I'm ready for this," she said emphatically. "I'm ready to stop being plain, frightened, uncertain Bella Swan and be what Edward sees in me; the bright, funny, confident, and beautiful girl that stubbornly accomplishes whatever she puts her mind to."

"Well said," I whispered.

"It's what you're always trying to tell me, right?" she asked nervously.

"Exactly."

"Well," Reneé said, sounding a little defeated. "I still think you're making a huge mistake. As much as I like Edward, I don't like that he has made you become dependent on him like you are."

"I'm not dependent on him. Jesus, do you know how long it took me to realize that loving him doesn't make me dependent? He makes me stronger because he's always--no matter how stupid he thinks I'm being--there for me. Having someone besides Dad, who lives twelve hundred miles away, support me is the most incredible feeling I've ever known."

"So what are you going to do?" Reneé asked. "Drop out of school and pop out little half-British babies because you got involved with a man who's pushing forty?"

Both our jaws dropped in shock at the venom in her voice. "Who are you?" Bella gasped.

"I'm sorry. That didn't come out right," Reneé said quickly. "Hormones have made me a bitch. I-I don't want to see you make my mistakes all over again."

A tear slid down Bella's mottled cheek. "Just forget it. I'll send you a save the date card and you can sit at home twiddling your fucking thumbs while I walk down the aisle."

"Bella-"

"Hang up, Edward." I was frozen and couldn't get my hands to cooperate. "Hang up!" she screeched.

I did as I was told just as Bella fell back and started crying. I blinked for a moment, trying to process how our blissful afternoon had gone so awry in the span of a few minutes, and then became livid with Reneé for ruining this for us--more importantly, for Bella.

I threw the phone across the room and watched it shatter upon impact with the wall before I scooped Bella up and forced her to look at me.

"Stop it," I commanded, staring into the tear stained face that broke my heart. "I will not let you destroy yourself because your mother is too daft to see that you would never do something so serious without knowing that you wouldn't fail. You're too bloody stubborn to fail."

"But you were just worried earlier that I'd change my mind," she sniffled.

"I was wrong. It was my own irrational fear talking because life without you is pointless. Your mother..." I trailed off, trying to work through the anger I felt toward Reneé. "Your mother is no mother at all. A mother is there to guide you as you make your way through life and support you in every decision you make. Not to scream at you because you've done something she doesn't agree with or leave you to fend for yourself because she's too busy trying to shag some random bloke she met.

"I've never understood how a person--no matter how big the mistake was--could turn away from their child. That's when your children need you most," I said passionately. "To pick them up when they fall and help them right themselves again. It's infuriating to me that you're not even making a mistake and yet Reneé is so blind that she can't see that."

"She's selfish," Bella whispered. "Always has been."

"Obviously."

"Our kids are going to be lucky little bastards with you as their father," she joked.

I chuckled and kissed every part of her face, starting with her forehead and making my way to her lips. "I take it you're all right since you've become comical again?"

She nodded. "I'm okay. Hey, baby?"

I lifted my brows. "Yes?"

"You were right."

"About what?" I asked in confusion.

"My mom's a fucking idiot."

* * *

**Bella**

Reneé called back a few times, unbelievably even calling Charlie to try to persuade me to talk to her and listen to her apology, but I had nothing left to say to her; we'd pretty much covered it all over Edward's now ruined phone.

I pushed my mother from my mind for the rest of the afternoon. Her reaction hadn't really surprised me; I knew she wouldn't be happy for me, but it did nothing to curb the ache that I felt from her disapproval. Reneé, despite her flaws, was still my mother, and I found myself constantly seeking her praise regardless of how shitty I thought her mothering skills with me had been.

Something that made absolutely no fucking sense to me at all.

There were no words to describe how thankful I was for Edward. He'd snapped me out of my self-pitying cry and told me all the things I needed to hear. He shared the same idealistic views I did when it came to parenting, and at that very second, I vowed that I would _never _treat my children--however far off in the distance they may be--the way that Reneé had treated me.

Edward used the rest of the afternoon to distract me, even going as far as to convince me to join him in his basement gym.

Big mistake.

I tripped down the stairs, and Edward had to reach out and catch me before I seriously injured myself. Every piece of equipment he tried to teach me to use felt awkward and forced, but Edward was nothing but patient with me, even managing to hide his smiles at my more idiotic moments. At one point, I'd even managed to drop a weight on my toe, blackening it immediately. I hobbled up the stairs and went to sulk in a corner somewhere with some ice, while he stayed downstairs and ran however many millions of miles he ran each day.

Being engaged to someone who was so in shape did absolutely nothing for my self-esteem. I was already raw from my argument with Reneé and before I knew it, I was crying softly into a pillow on my side of Edward's bed.

I had to get out of here.

I grabbed my purse and double-checked to make sure a spare apartment key was inside, and then hovered next to the garage door, trying to decide which of Edward's many vehicles to drive. I snatched the Audi's keys off their hook, and put my hand on the knob, only to be stopped by Edward's voice ringing throughout the cavernous kitchen.

"Bella! Where do you think you're going?"

I whipped my head around and was momentarily stunned by his appearance. His brow was dappled with sweat that glistened in the overhead lights, and his unruly hair was dark with a rogue curl plastered to his forehead. He'd ripped his shirt off, exposing his chiseled body to me and his black track pants hung low on his hips, giving me the perfect view of the vee of his narrow hips and the hair that traveled from navel to...

I noticed his amused smirk as I shook myself out of my dazed state. And remembered to breathe again. "My apartment. I thought I could tell Rosie the good news and then come back."

He shook his head and frowned. Darkly. "Jesus, Bella. Are you daft? Or mad?"

"Uh..." I was a little surprised by his reaction. "No?"

Before I knew what was happening, my hand was free from the weight of the keys. "You're going nowhere without me." He towered over me, almost vibrating with frustration and... worry?

I huffed and shifted on my feet with my annoyance. "You're really going to keep me at your mercy this weekend? I'm not a prisoner."

He rolled his eyes before he fixed his angered stare on me. "I'd never hold you against your will. But you are not going out without a bodyguard of some sort. Give me five minutes, and I'll dress and come with you."

"I don't need a babysitter."

"So you know exactly how to handle the mob that's bound to follow you to your flat?" He arched his brow challengingly and closed the distance between us.

Oh.

"Five minutes," he repeated, his voice slowly making its way to the gentle cadence I was accustomed to.

"Why did you get so pissed at me?" I asked, looking up at him with probing eyes.

His face softened as he brought his hand to the small of my back, pressing me into him. "The thought of something happening to you because of my career..." He shook his head with a pained expression. "It's suffocating. I can't see reason when I envision you being tripped and trampled because-"

"Hey," I whispered, knowing he simply needed reassurance. Despite how cool and confident he was, everything that had happened between us was just as new to him as it was to me. "It's okay. I'm okay. Stop worrying, you freak."

He nodded and bent to kiss me tenderly before he turned away.

I sat down in one of the bar stools, idly playing on my phone while I waited for Edward to return. He came back still dressed in his black track pants and sneakers, but had slipped on a white t-shirt and a black hooded sweatshirt.

"All right. I'm decent. We can go now."

I shook my head. "You're not decent. You're fucking _in_decent. Do you know how many girls are going to drool over this non-shaven beach bum look you've got going on here?"

His lips twitched. "Are you drooling over my 'non-shaven beach bum look'?"

"Yes!" I exclaimed loudly.

He laughed. "Rest assured, Miss Swan, no one will come near your fiancé since I didn't bother to shower. I'm sure I smell like I bathed in the bin there." He pointed to the trashcans hidden in one of the cabinets.

"Not even close." I hopped off the bar stool and brought his face down so that I could inhale the air around him. "You smell..." I felt my mouth water with the musky, sweet scent that was so inherently Edward. "I could make a fortune off your scent. Girls would be droppin' panties left and right if I bottled this and sold it."

"I thought that was reserved for smiles."

"You've got that, too. I'm marrying a pussy magnet."

A startled cough bubbled up from his chest. "I am no such thing!" he replied vehemently.

"You know you're gorgeous." I smirked at him. "And girls throw themselves at you everywhere you go. That, baby, is a pussy magnet."

He sighed. "Can we _please_ stop discussing my sex appeal and go? I should purchase a new mobile while we're out since I so stupidly destroyed mine."

"Fine," I said flippantly.

He hung the keys to the Audi up and took the ones to the Land Rover instead. He saw my curious expression and grinned crookedly. "This car—outside of your Audi--will eventually be yours." He paused for a beat. "Well, whichever year's model happens to be in the garage when that time comes around. I like to replace vehicles every year."

"You replace your cars every year?" I asked incredulously. "Why?"

He shrugged. "What else am I going to do with a thirty-million-a-picture paycheck?"

"Point." I took the keys from him and hopped into the dark blue SUV. "So why will this be my car?"

"Family vehicle," he explained simply as he folded himself into the passenger's seat.

I stopped abruptly and narrowed my eyes. "You've just got this shit all planned out, don't you? When are you planning on trying to knock me up, Edward?"

He ran his hand through his hair nervously, finally raking back that lone curl. "I don't have anything planned, love. Why do you think I said 'when that time comes around'? I'm merely waiting on you."

"Right," I said sarcastically. But honestly, I wasn't bothered by it. I'd had my own thoughts and visions of a family with Edward since I started working for him. "How many half-British babies are you planning on having me pop out?" I asked, teasing him with my mother's harsh words. I was_ not_ going to let her ruin this.

His eyebrows shot up, but he didn't comment. "It's no matter to me," he said awkwardly. "What do you want our family to comprise of?"

"You don't care?" I asked doubtfully.

"No, not particularly. One is even all right with me."

"Hmm," I responded vaguely.

"Would you just start the car and drive? My God, you're a pain in the arse this afternoon," he complained. "Yip, yip, yip..."

My mouth gaped at the sight of my Edward using his hands like little talking people and actually using the word _yip_.

He glanced over at me. "What?"

"What the fuck is wrong with you?"

He laughed and motioned for me to start the car again. "Nothing's _wrong_, Bella. I'm in a good mood."

I carefully backed the SUV out of the garage--it was a hell of a lot bigger than my Audi--and pulled out of the driveway with the radio up. I needed anything but silence today.

I glanced in the rearview mirror and groaned. "We've got company."

"I knew we would," Edward muttered, glancing at the side mirror behind us. "Drive slow," he instructed. "Don't let them frighten you."

I gripped the wheel tighter. "What?" I asked in alarm.

"It's all right," he said comfortingly. "Occasionally, they'll ride your bumper or try to box you in for a photo. Just drive like they're part of everyday, normal traffic."

I let out a shaky breath. "Okay." I suddenly felt sick to my stomach.

"We'll get a new mobile first so that I can drive the rest of the way to your flat."

"Okay," I repeated. My eyes kept darting back to the mirror.

I crept through the city; I felt like one of those annoying old lady's taking their Sunday stroll but managed to get us there in one piece.

Edward got out first and pushed his way through the crowd so that he could help me out. He took my hand and carefully brought me into his arms while simultaneously kicking the door shut--much to my surprise-- and locking the SUV at the same time.

I was blinded by the flashes of light and had to let Edward lead me through the hysteria that had become my life. Question after question was fired at us, but again, I couldn't make sense of any of it. I did, in the middle of the chaos, instinctively hide my left hand under Edward's sweatshirt because I definitely didn't want to feed the fucking frenzy with a shot of my engagement ring.

Surprisingly, Edward said nothing until we'd made it in the building and the door had closed behind us. Only then did the tight lines of worry around his eyes begin to fade.

"You're all right?"

I gulped and nodded.

We were immediately accosted by a sales rep, which I quickly learned was one of the perks of being a famous Hollywood actor--no lines--and were led to the displays of whatever they sold. Edward stood behind me and kept me firmly tucked under his arms while the sales rep ran through his pitch for each phone Edward was interested in and would lightly press a kiss to my hair or my neck while he listened.

The flashes never ceased.

Edward finally decided on something and pulled his SIM card out of his pocket and handed it to the overeager guy so that he could set the phone up for Edward before we left.

Edward sighed against me while the cameras kept shooting us from the sidewalk. "It would be really nice if this store had tinted windows."

I giggled. "It would."

He grinned crookedly back and sat me down on the bench next to him, never once looking out at the crowd. "You're being remarkably calm throughout all this."

"Where would I go? We came in one car," I teased.

"That we did."

I bit my lip and took his hand. "But could you please quit acting like I'm going to bail? I know I was a shitty girlfriend and all; I don't need the constant reminder."

His eyes widened fractionally, and he moved closer to me. "No," he breathed. "You misunderstood me. I merely meant that you weren't shaking or spewing random word vomit out of your mouth like you so frequently do when you're nervous about something. You're absolutely perfect, so composed and unruffled. It's a wonderful surprise."

Heat blossomed in my cheeks and in my heart. "Thanks," I said, shyly ducking my head.

"What's that?" he laughed.

"I don't know," I groaned in embarrassment. "It meant a lot, I guess, hearing that from you."

He leaned down and pressed his lips to mine, ignoring everyone around us. I immediately pulled away and flushed an even deeper shade of red. "I don't... I mean, that..."

He chuckled and ran his nose over my jaw before placing a kiss there as well. "I need to train you to overlook the crowd," he murmured playfully.

"Good luck," I said wryly.

We finally paid and braved the mob again on our way to the car. This time, as soon as Edward had me securely in the passenger's seat, he made quick conversation--even laughing about something--with the photographers before climbing into the SUV.

"Good God, you're small," he grumbled as he waited for the seat to distance itself from the wheel.

"Sorry," I said sheepishly.

Edward maneuvered the Land Rover around the sea of people surrounding us and out of the parking lot. He watched the road cautiously and joked about some of the photographers that were still following us.

"Why do you do that?" I asked suddenly.

"Do what?"

"Talk to them. You're always so nice. Don't they get on your nerves?"

He shook his head as his eyes flickered over to me. "It's part of it, love. I knew it from the moment I got into this business. Having involved you, however, is a different story entirely. I'm much more... protective of you than I'd imagined I would be. And I'm nice to them because believe it or not, it actually appeases them. All they want is a shot and a quick quote. You'd be surprised how often that's all it takes for them to back off. For a little while, anyway," he added.

I filed that away for future use.

We repeated the whole getting-out-of-the-SUV-while-being-surrounded-by-the-infected-people-from-_Resident Evil _thing again when we got to my apartment building, but this time, the photographers couldn't follow us to the door.

Thank fucking God.

I burst into the apartment with a huge grin on my face, gripping Edward's hand tightly. "Rosie!" I called, shutting the door behind me.

"Well, if it isn't the famous girl. And her boy toy," she joked. "Did you make it here okay?"

I nodded my head once. "It could've been a lot worse." I stopped and felt that grin make an appearance again.

"What?"

I glanced over at Edward who merely laughed silently at me. "I'm engaged!" I shrieked, holding my hand out for her to see.

_Shit, I sounded just like Alice..._

But I was too happy to care.

Her eyes threatened to come out of her skull. "What?!" she yelled back.

"I'm engaged!" I repeated.

"Oh, my God!" she shouted. "Emmett! Bella's getting married!"

"What?" he yelled as he stomped around Rosalie's bedroom.

Rosalie rushed over to me. "Let me see this."

I held out my hand for her to inspect the ring.

"It's kind of small," she commented, scrunching up her nose and looking at Edward funny.

I jerked my hand back. "It was his mother's," I said indignantly.

"Oh. Sorry. That's really sweet," she said to him sincerely.

"Thank you," he responded. His fingers idly traced patterns on the small of my back.

"Did I just hear that Bond is getting hitched?" Emmett asked as he walked in the room.

"Yep. Edward asked me last night." And again this morning, but I wanted to keep that moment to myself.

"Holy shit, Bella's getting married before us!" he exclaimed in disbelief.

"Not because of any fault of mine," Rosalie muttered.

"I heard that, babe. I'll get there. Let's graduate first, okay?"

She smiled acidly. "Okay."

He ignored her. "Well, Edward, now that you're her fiancé, I guess you'll want to toss this in the trash." He threw Old Faithful at Edward.

Edward lithely caught it and scowled. "Why do I want her to get rid of it?"

I didn't give Emmett a chance to answer. "_Why_ the_ hell_ do you have that?" I screamed.

"Relax, I just got it out of the drawer a second ago. Your batteries are dead by the way. Maybe Edward should buy you a sawzall and let you attach it to the end. Plug that baby right on up and let loose. You'll get more miles out of it that way."

"I'd like to watch that," Edward said thoughtfully. His darkened gaze met mine.

_Cripes..._ I needed to go change my underwear from the dark intent that was swimming around those piercing green eyes of his.

"I'll bring Rosie and the camera," Emmett joked back. "We can put it up on the internet and make a fuckload of money off Bella's newfound fame. BlackandDeckerBella(dot)com."

If it wasn't so damn funny, I'd be hiding under a blanket by now.

An involuntary giggle escaped my throat when I saw Rosalie's struggle not to laugh. "Fuck you all. I'm going to my room. You can just go back home," I said to Edward lightly.

Edward jerked me back with a smirk. "Not so fast. I told you I wasn't letting you out of my sight until I found a suitable bodyguard."

Emmett's brow crinkled. "Bella needs a bodyguard?"

"I'd feel more comfortable about her safety knowing she had one now that the press is hounding us for a story."

Emmett nodded. "Makes sense. I'll do it."

"What?" I blinked rapidly.

Edward scrutinized Emmett's large, muscular body for a moment before nodding. "I'll pay you."

"Sweet. What do I have to do?"

"Stay with Bella at all times outside of the flat or class when she's not with me. Make sure no one comes near her," he said sternly. "I will not have her harmed, Emmett."

"You want to be my bodyguard?" I interrupted.

Emmett shrugged. "Why not? I go to the same school as you, and I'm here all the time anyway. Why not get paid for hanging out with you? Besides, nobody will want to fuck with you as long as I'm there."

I had to agree with that last bit; Emmett could be extremely menacing when he wanted to be.

"On one condition," I said seriously.

"What's that?" Emmett looked confused.

"Do _not_--under any circumstances--make fun of me in public. I do not need that shit floating around the web."

"No prob, BDB." Emmett threw me a wide, impish grin that flashed his dimples.

Fuck.


	21. Chapter 21

**One word: Epic. It's been used to describe this chapter by more than one person and it is totally apropos. I got a little um, carried away, maybe? I blame New Moon. Damn depressing book/movie.**

**Thanks to Stratan for beta'ing this and not making everyone who read the teaser wait. **

**Don't forget to check me out on Twitter and my blog. **

**I'll be adding them shortly, but Marianne_Northman_Cullen has started making outfits for this fic. I'm telling you in the last week, this sucker's kind of exploded (Yay). I'll post everything on my profile so those who want a visual can have it.**

**That being said, links for all of E's cars and B's ring are already there. He still has yet to drive that Ferarri...**

* * *

Chapter 21

**Bella**

I walked into Edward's study, running my hands through my still damp hair and stopped at the sight of the exotic-looking woman standing before me. Her height matched that of Edward's, and her skin was a dewy, caramel color. Her limbs were long and lean, and her black hair cascaded down her graceful back in elegant waves. She had a gray pencil skirt on, showcasing her insanely perfect body, and a deep burgundy silk shell that veed in the front, giving _my Edward_ full view of her ample chest.

My self esteem plummeted a good ten points just from being in close proximity to her.

She said something I couldn't understand, and Edward let out a genuine laugh as she lightly touched his forearm, shamelessly flirting with him right in front of me.

Reason fled my mind for a split second, and I nearly leapt across the room to tear them apart. Something unfamiliar stirred in my chest, and I quickly realized that for the first time in my life, I was truly jealous of the way another woman looked at him. Before now, it had been a dreamy, unadulterated lust that crossed the faces of strangers and classmates whenever I mentioned that my boss was Edward Masen. That I could handle, because none of them knew him personally and unfortunately, it came with the territory of dating a celebrity.

But this... she knew him--well--and I found that I irrationally despised her. No matter how good she was at her job. Worse was that Edward was completely oblivious to her intentions.

Edward glanced over and saw me standing in the doorway observing them. He gave me a dazzling smile, effectively putting me in my place. Edward loved me. I just had to remember that.

"Z, this is Bella." He motioned for me to join them. "Bella, this is Zafrina Torres."

_Z? Oh, no. I don't like that..._

"Uh-huh."

Edward gave me a curious look, but didn't comment.

"Hello, Bella. It's nice to meet you." God, even her accent was beautiful and exotic.

She stretched out her hand expectantly.

Well, fuck.

"Nice to meet you, too," I muttered, reluctantly shaking her hand.

Edward's arm snaked around my waist and pulled me against him. "What is wrong with you?" he whispered into my ear.

I shrugged and forced myself not to grope him in front of her to stake my claim. "I didn't like the way she was touching you."

He laughed once. "Are you envious of my publicist?" he asked teasingly.

"I don't share." I concentrated on Edward's mossy eyes instead of giving Zafrina a dirty look.

"Neither do I," he growled. "But there's nothing for you to be upset about."

"So you say."

"What?" He looked baffled.

"Nothing. It's nothing," I responded hurriedly. I was being stupid. Any more idiocy, and I'd be blushing.

"This conversation is far from over," he warned.

Great. I had to find the most observant man in America to fall in love with.

"So, Bella," Zafrina started. "I understand you're a student at USC?"

I leaned on the arm of the couch in front of Edward and pushed everything aside so that I could talk to her without trying to rip her hair out. "Yeah. My last semester before graduate school."

"You've been accepted?" she asked.

"No, not yet. My advisor doesn't think I'll have any issues."

She nodded and glanced back at Edward. "How long have the two of you been together?"

"Officially, since Thanksgiving."

She stared at us in disbelief. "And you're already engaged?"

Edward chuckled and put his chin on my shoulder. "I knew she was the one the moment I saw her. I couldn't get her out of my mind, Z. I don't think time spent with a person really matters, does it? Look at couples who get married in Vegas without knowing each other at all. Most fail, but a select few find out that the spark that was felt between them was real and turned into so much more."

"Beautifully put, Edward, but let's be serious. This complicates things."

"I don't bloody care." He almost snarled it at her. "I hid my feelings for her over three months. I'm not doing it any longer."

"Okay." She held up her hands in surrender and laughed awkwardly. "Bella, you wouldn't be willing to take off the ring for a few months and make my job easier, would you?"

"No," I said firmly.

She groaned and squeezed her eyes shut. "Here's the problem. We've created an image with you, Edward. It's worked for a long time. We were slowly ridding you of that image with Tanya, and now that this secret relationship you've had with Bella has been leaked, it's... Well, you're back at square one. Any progress we made clearing you of your playboy status is ruined."

"What are you trying to say?" I asked, leaning back into Edward.

"No one is going to believe that Edward fell in love and gave up his ways in such a short amount of time."

"But the shit with Tanya wasn't real!" I protested.

She cocked her brow. "Now, that is something we're going to have to work on. You can't just curse whenever you want anymore, Bella."

I nodded glumly; I knew with all the censorship on TV, there was no way I could speak normally in public anymore.

She continued. "I know Edward's relationship with Tanya wasn't real, but it was executed to look like the two of them met when Tanya auditioned for the part and slowly built a relationship from there. In the months that they were supposedly dating, how many times were they actually spotted out together outside some sort of Hollywood function?"

"Three," Edward answered. "Two dinner dates and the night at Area."

Zafrina reached into her huge, black leather bag and handed us a few pictures. "You've already managed twice in a weekend."

"So what do you want us to do?" he asked, not bothering to look at the photos.

"Lay low for a while."

"I knew it," Edward said smugly.

Zafrina laughed. "I want to set up a couple of interviews and photo shoots. One with the two of you together and one with just Edward. I think instead of trying to fight what Tanya's saying, I want to spin it to benefit you."

"How so?"

"So what if you met your assistant and fell in love while dating someone else? It suits the personality you've let everyone perceive of you. You can use this as your reasoning; you've not been whoring yourself out all these years. You've been searching for her." She looked at me pointedly.

"That's not really a lie other than the fact that I've been whoring myself out. We both know that is far from true." He started playing with my ring while he spoke.

She shrugged and grinned at us. "Now, here's my plan. We'll get these interviews out as soon as we can, but then we'll say nothing else until closer to _Rogue's_ release. I'd rather not, but since the two of you are so adamant about it, we'll announce your engagement just before the first article comes out to create some buzz and help its circulation. I want you to be completely honest in the interview; don't hide who you are, Bella."

"Why?"

"I think America will love you. You're _normal_ and yet you still managed to snag America's most wanted man, and not have just a one night stand. You tamed him. It's every girl's fantasy."

I nodded again.

"When I say to lay low, I don't mean hide out in the house. Go to class, perform your everyday tasks, but don't make it a point to go on date after date after date, just because you can. I don't want you two to seem like a publicity stunt."

"All right," Edward said. "What about awards season?"

"Bella, do you think you could accompany him to the Oscars?"

I shifted. "That's the only one?" It wasn't like I really wanted to get dressed up like a Barbie and traipse all over town, but I hated that he was going to go alone to the other ceremonies.

She nodded. "For this year. It's the biggest of the year for Edward--he's presenting Lead Actress in a Drama since he won last year--and he'll be expected to go to the _Vanity Fair_ after party. I think it's perfect for your first time out as an official couple."

"Are you comfortable with that, love?" Edward asked me.

I watched something flash in Zafrina's eyes, and my own narrowed in response, prompting her to look away. I sucked in a breath so that I could answer Edward calmly. "It's okay. I just hate that you have to go stag to whatever comes before that. Especially since Tanya will be there."

"Tanya will not be a problem," Zafrina said confidently. "She'll be too worried about making herself look good to cause a scene. However, I think it would be best if the two of you stayed as far away from each other as possible. If you see her somewhere, Bella, leave." She pulled another stack of papers out of her bag with a cocky grin. "If she goes too far with her little scandal, these'll shut her up."

Edward chuckled. "I'd completely forgotten about those. I assumed since Tanya went completely psychotic on me Thursday night, she'd never signed them."

"She did," Zafrina replied.

I was lost. "What is it?"

"The agreement we signed when we went into this fake relationship," he answered. "We're allowed to take matters into our own hands to protect our careers if this happened to go bad, however, if she goes too far--as Zafrina said--we can leak these and stop this ridiculous press war."

"Why didn't we do that in the first place?" I asked dumbly.

"Have you ever heard the old saying 'the only bad publicity is no publicity at all'?" Zafrina asked.

"Oh."

She tucked her hair behind her ear. "You need to be aware that they'll use the age difference to try to break you--both." She stared at Edward seriously. "They'll be looking into her now. Are you sure you know everything about her?"

I opened my mouth to defend myself, but Edward squeezed my hand in a silent warning to stop. "I know all there is. From day one we promised nothing but honesty with one another. She's nothing to hide."

Her smile was thin. "I was just making sure. I'd hate to put all this effort into the two of you as a couple, only for something to come out about Bella, and then deal with cleaning up after a tumultuous break up."

I was completely offended by her assessment of me. "Are you implying that I'm not what I seem?"

"Not at all. I'm simply making sure I have all the details of the situation. It's my job."

I bit my tongue so that I didn't hurl some kind of immature insult at her.

Edward seemed to sense the tension and changed the subject to my behavior with the press alone. I was instructed to keep my mouth shut at all times and let Edward handle things himself. The only time I was to comment--no matter how pissed off I got--was if Edward was near.

It was like being forced to sign a gag order; I hated it. So I told them about it.

"I'm not an idiot. I'm not going to slap some random paparazzi because he told me I was a gold-digger or said something equally asinine. I'd never do or say anything to embarrass Edward."

"I think you should lighten up on her, Z," Edward chimed in. "She's been extremely gracious under fire so far. Why would she suddenly stop now?"

Zafrina nodded reluctantly. "Please, whatever you do, be vague. No specifics--ever. And be polite. Even if it kills you."

"Got it. Vague. Polite. Charming. Even when I want to rip their throats out. I can handle that."

She gazed at me skeptically, but let it go. "I've got a meeting in an hour. Edward, I'll call you in a few days and speak to you about your first interview. Who's your agent now?"

"You're looking at her." Edward kissed my temple with a grin.

"Oh, Jesus. Are you serious?" She exhaled sharply. "Okay, Bella, what's your number so I can talk to you about which publications to call?"

I bristled in Edward's arms. "Let's get one thing straight here, _Z_. I'm well aware you don't like me. But don't for one second insinuate that I'm incapable of handling any of this."

"Bella," Edward groaned. "Please, love."

"It's okay, Edward." Zafrina smiled. "I'm sorry, Bella, that wasn't my intention. I'm trying not to let personal feelings get involved, but it's hard."

My heart dropped. "Personal feelings?"

Her smile faded. "You're well aware how distanced Edward is from everyone. He rarely lets anyone get close to him because of the potential backlash when they turn out to be... less than honorable. I'm one of the few friends Edward has allowed himself to have in this business. It's hard to sit here and be just his publicist and not his friend as well; I don't want anyone to hurt him."

I cocked my head to the side. "That's all?"

She flushed slightly and averted her gaze again. "That's it."

_Liar, liar, pants on fire,_ I taunted in my head.

I opened my mouth to reply, only to be interrupted by the sound of someone pressing the button on the gate's intercom. Edward patted my arms so that I'd get up.

"That'd be Emmett," he murmured.

Fucking Emmett and his God-awful timing.

I left the room--but not before I stared at Zafrina and made sure she knew that I wasn't fooled--and went to kitchen to check the monitor. Sure enough, Emmett was making goofy faces at the camera.

"Cut it out, weirdo."

He laughed and rolled up the window as the gate started to go up. I could hear his massive Jeep coming up the driveway, so I went on over to the door and threw it open. Emmett gracefully jumped out of his Jeep and hurried up the steps, grinning widely at me.

"Agent McCarty reporting for duty," he joked.

"You have the worst timing _ever_."

He frowned. "Why? I'm here at a quarter after. Just like we agreed on."

"I left Edward in the study with his skank of a publicist," I told him in irritation.

"Want me to throw her out? It is my job now."

I laughed a little. "No, but thanks anyway."

I led him to the study, listening to him whistle lowly in appreciation at Edward's house. "Shit, BDB. You sure know how to pick 'em."

"Don't call me that, asshole." His angelic face made me giggle. "God, I'm going to hate this.

He wrapped his massive arm around me and kissed my hair. "You love me. You can't live without me. Just admit that Masen's all for show, and I'll whisk you off into the sunset."

"And do what with Rosalie?" I countered.

"Nothing. Two girls at my beck and call sounds fucking awesome." He grinned and winked.

"Kiss me, Emmett," said in a breathy moan. "Let's see how long it takes before one of us hurls on the other."

He grimaced. "Or maybe not."

Zafrina was packing up her belongings when we walked back into the study. She caught sight of Emmett and me, and her motions faltered slightly before she resumed putting her notebook back inside.

Yep, Emmett was the perfect bodyguard. Unconsciously scary.

I grabbed my book bag and sat it on my shoulder, rummaging through it to make sure I had everything I needed. I set the Blackberry on vibrate and put it in the side pocket just as Edward's arms wrapped around my waist.

"You leaving?" he murmured sadly.

"Yeah. I don't want to be late."

"Be careful."

I spun around to face him. "I will. I'll have Emmett."

"Very true." He smirked down at me.

I ran my fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck. "You have that photo shoot today."

"I remember. Call me later? I'll be absurdly bored without you here." He pouted like a child, making me laugh.

"I'll call you when I'm eating lunch. Okay?"

"I want you back for dinner." My brows knit. "I've not forgotten the conversation we still need to have."

"Shit. Fine, whatever, make me feel like an idiot." I stood on my toes and kissed him quickly. "I'll talk to you later."

He grinned crookedly and released me. "Later then."

I hopped in the passenger's seat of Emmett's Jeep and put my bag between my feet and felt my personal phone vibrate in my jeans pocket. I pulled it out, rolling my eyes and expecting it to be Edward, only to hear my mother's voice in my ear.

"Reneé!" I exclaimed, startled. "I have to go. I'm-"

"Don't hang up. Bella, we need to talk."

"About what? I'm pretty sure you said everything you needed to on the phone the other day."

Emmett cast me a sideways look at my tone.

"I know I said a lot of horrible things that I shouldn't have. I'm just worried about you. You don't call; you don't come by. You got involved with Edward only a couple of months ago and now you're engaged? I don't want you to rush into anything, sis. Like I did."

"No, Reneé, you didn't rush into anything. ou got pregnant and Charlie Swan was there to make sure you didn't look like a whore," I spat.

"Bella!" she gasped.

"You know what I don't understand?" I asked rhetorically. "I don't understand why, if you didn't want to be a mother, why you took me with you when you divorced him. Why didn't you just leave me there? I would've been happy with Charlie. I wouldn't have had to learn how to do everything myself; Charlie would have taught it all to me. And I wouldn't have thought to run away from Edward every time he got too close to me."

"Bella, I'm sorry. I don't know what else to say except you're wrong. I may not be the mother you wish I was or think I should've been, but don't think for one second that I didn't want you. If I didn't, you wouldn't be here now. End of story."

"Well, that's fucking fantastic. Thanks for that. But it's too little too late. You're lucky I didn't turn out to be some crack whore with as little as you had to do with me as a kid. God, did you ever think how much you were screwing me up by exposing me to the revolving door of men? You didn't for once think about what you were doing to me; you were just worried about where your next orgasm was coming from."

"I think that's a little exaggerated, Bella."

"I don't. Not at all. Stay with Phil, Reneé. Stop being such a stupid woman and be a responsible adult. If not for me, then at least for my brother because he deserves a better life than what you gave me. As for me, forget I exist."

"Bella, stop!"

I shook my head. "I can't do it anymore. I can't keep wishing for the mother I don't have only to be disappointed each and every time I think she might make her first appearance. It's not worth it. I'm happy now with Edward. I can't let you fuck it up for me anymore."

And with that, I hung up.

I rested my head on the window and let a few tears fall. Emmett reached over and squeezed my shoulder.

"You all right, Bond?"

I nodded and sniffled. "Fine."

"You know, Rosie's told me a lot about your mom. She's a fucking piece of work, that girl."

I laughed bleakly.

"She's the fucking poster child for people who should not be allowed to reproduce." He paused. "But I guess that means that if she didn't, you wouldn't be here and Rosie wouldn't have her best friend. So... that's out."

I sighed heavily. "Thanks, Em."

Emmett parked on campus and came around to my side of his massive Jeep so that none of the photographers could get too close to me. I opened the door and stood by his protective stance with my head bent down, letting my hair form a curtain around my face. Something inside me shifted, and I felt myself being thrown back to the shy, uncertain girl I was before.

I was suddenly, acutely aware that the graciousness I'd managed to show during all this was simply because Edward was with me. He was my strength--my composure. Without him guiding me through all of this, I was lost.

A surge of panic rolled through me, and I swayed on my feet unsteadily. Bile rose in my throat with the sounds of the shouts surrounding me, and I found myself gripping to Emmett like a lifeline, only to find that it had no calming effect whatsoever. It felt like the figures around me loomed ominously, slowly closing in on me and suffocating me.

"Bell?" Emmett whispered. "What's up?"

I swallowed convulsively and willed myself to be heard over the buzz surrounding us. "Call Edward," I croaked.

I untangled myself from the crowd and bolted to the nearest bathroom, hearing the rapid fire of questions chasing after me like exorcised demons, furiously reaching out to bring my soul back into their clutches and causing a sliver of fear to crawl down my spine.

I stormed into the bathroom and shoved the door shut, locking it behind me. I raced to the closest stall and threw myself over the toilet. Tears streamed down my face, and I brought my hands up to my clammy face to push my hair back. I dry heaved twice before collapsing onto the floor and curling up into a ball.

My body shook in terror and broken sobs randomly escaped me. It was unfounded, this hysterical reaction I was having to the press and publicity after having already experienced it over the weekend. I knew, rationally, that Emmett would never let any of these people harm me and that I could handle this. All I had to do was walk from the car to class and it would all be over.

So what the fuck was wrong with me?

I felt exposed--down to the quick--without Edward's presence. All the fears I'd felt before slammed into me, like I was reverting back to the way I was before Edward. I didn't want to hear any of the hateful words that were currently being said about me. I didn't want to hear people say I was ugly and undeserving, a slut, or after his money. I didn't want to be featured on blog after blog and have pictures of me eating or something else just as unflattering everywhere. I wanted to be unknown again, but the desperate need I had to be with Edward was more powerful.

The thought of Edward coming to find me like this brought a fresh wave of tears. I cried harder with the shame that I wasn't good enough for him. I couldn't handle his life like the person he deserved. I was nothing but a scared, immature child still. A simple phone call with Reneé had proven that.

I knew I needed to get up off the floor and go to class, but I couldn't. I'd withdrawn into myself and had no idea how to surface from the dark waters I'd suddenly found myself fighting against.

And so I drowned.

* * *

**Edward**

Something felt off. I'd felt it since the moment I'd awoken this morning. I wasn't sure if the feeling was for Bella or myself, but as time slowly progressed, the feeling grew more and more intense.

I let Samson outside to run before I retreated back to the bedroom to shower and ready myself for a quick photo shoot planned with a few other actors for an article in Vanity Fair. The house felt empty and silent without Bella. My room swam with her scent, and I ridiculously found myself worrying about her again, though I knew she was safe with Emmett.

I shaved, showered, and dressed quickly, unable to stand being inside my hollow surroundings. Alice had always teased me about how sterile my house was, but now I knew exactly what she meant. It wasn't a home until Bella, merely an array of lumber and stone, plaster and paint. She made it come to life just by simply leaving her towel on the floor in the bathroom or throwing her latest lecture's notes on the desk for future study.

I got into the R8 and drove to the location of the shoot. My morning had gone... not as expected, further increasing that strange sense of wrongness. Bella and Zafrina for some reason did not seem to like one another, and I was completely clueless as to why.

But I had every intention of prying the reason from Bella tonight when she was through with her last class.

I arrived on set and went straight for the chair, murmuring quick hellos to everyone I passed. Makeup and hair worked on me for a while, and then I got up to change into the white linen shirt and jeans they had laid out for me before joining the other actors waiting on the beach.

"Masen!" Demetri Kelley called out as I came over. "I hear you got yourself a little tart on the side. Tanya's pissed, dude!"

My hand itched to reach up and shove my hair back. I had to be careful what I said so that I didn't give away the fact that I was engaged before it was announced. "Erm, she's not exactly on the side."

"What?" he laughed. "Did you ditch her already?"

I didn't answer.

"She's fucking hot. If you're finished with her, pass her on over here." He high-fived some other moron.

"That's never going to happen," I said through my teeth. Anger whipped through me , and I was perilously close to reaching out and wrapping my hands around his neck so that I could squeeze the life out of him. "And if I hear you breathe a word about her to anyone else, so help me, I'll kill you."

His eyes widened and he backed up a little. "Sorry. Didn't know it was so serious."

"Now you do," I said shortly.

He mumbled something about how I needed to get a grip, and I realized immediately, he was right. I couldn't threaten harm to everyone who thought Bella was beautiful, because Bella was one of the most gorgeous women around; she just didn't know it. It was given that men would fantasize about her, and women would envy her. While I loved envisioning wrapping my arm around her waist on the red carpet, Bella actually being in the spotlight with me was going to take a bit of adjustment. I'd grown used to having her solely to myself.

"Listen, uh, she's important to me," I said, by way of an apology.

"Yeah, yeah. I get it, man. I'm happy for you."

"Thanks, mate."

We walked down the beach a ways and posed as a group for the cover before heading into the individual shots. I found myself pacing the shore and staring out into the deep blue water as I awaited my turn.

Odd.

I posed as instructed all while a strange sense of foreboding slowly crept over me. I kept trying to bury it down and focus on the task at hand, only for it to burst free from its cage and shock me with its strength.

My mobile buzzed incessantly in my pocket, and my heart literally stopped beating when I saw the name of the caller.

Emmett.

My heart resumed its beating, sprinting in my chest as I motioned for everyone to give me a moment. I put the mobile to my ear and instinctively knew that this was the reason for my worry all morning long.

"What's happened?" I asked in alarm.

"She freaked. She locked herself in a bathroom, and I can't get her to come out. I can hear her, Edward. She's crying. Shit, I've tried everything; it's like she can't hear me. I even tried telling her I was going to go to her place and get her vibrator so she could work out some of that stress but got nothing. No 'fuck you' , nothing." His voice was gruff with anxiety.

Thank God I wasn't that far away. "Don't move. I'll be right over."

I pocketed the mobile and ran to my car, shouting apologies and explaining that I had to take care of an emergency over my shoulder.

Speed limits and traffic signals meant nothing as I weaved in and out of the other vehicles on the road, desperate to get to Bella. I'd never been so terrified of something in all my life. I didn't know what was happening and each time I rang her mobile, but it threw me over to voicemail. I left a message every time, getting progressively more and more frantic with every passing second. If we came out of this intact, I was sure Bella would laugh at how shrill and ridiculous I sounded.

I finally pulled into the lot and parked haphazardly in a handicapped spot in front. I scanned the campus for any sign of them, only to see nothing but a group of people standing by Emmett's white Jeep.

I dialed Emmett's number, bouncing anxiously as I waited for him to answer.

"Where are you?" I snapped.

"Straight ahead. There's a bathroom to your right."

I didn't bother saying anything more or locking my car, for that matter. I simply took off at a dead sprint in the direction Emmett had said. My eyes darted around my surroundings, spotting Emmett's massive body hunkered down protectively in front of the door, snarling at anyone who dared to come near him.

He jumped up as soon as he saw me. "Thank God. I still can't get her to fucking answer me. Rosie's in class, and I didn't-"

"It's fine. It's fine." I knocked on the door. "Bella?"

Nothing.

"Help me break it down."

"Are you serious?" he asked incredulously. "Edward, the university might charge you with something like destruction of property."

"I don't give a shit!" I yelled. "Help me get to her!" Panic was clawing at my chest and threatening to rip me to shreds.

His eyes lit up with excitement. "Fuck yeah!"

We worked together to bring down the door. My shoulder ached, but finally, the lock gave way with a splintering crack and the door flew open, showing me the agonizing scene inside.

A strangled moan broke free from my chest as I saw Bella crumpled up on the dirty floor, shaking violently and whimpering softly. Her teeth chattered and her hair was wet from sweat and tears.

I knew instantly what this was. A severe panic attack.

"Holy fuck," Emmett whispered, wide eyed.

"Don't let anyone come near this door."

In a blink, I was by her side. I reached down and pushed her hair out of her face so that I could see her. "Oh, God, Bella," I moaned as my heart wrenched in my chest.

I took a deep breath and focused on retrieving the Bella that was hidden somewhere in those glassy eyes. "Emmett's outside wearing nothing but tiny pink women's knickers. The kind that ride in his arse. Thongs? It's quite disturbing, really."

Her eyes snapped to mine, and she let out a shuddering breath. "What?"

"Did the visual make you nauseated? You try witnessing it."

She blinked, and the fear slowly faded from her eyes. "Edward, I... I can't..." She squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head. "I can't without you."

She clambered into my lap, knocking me into the wall and burying her face into my neck. Her hands fisted my shirt and tugged as she slowly came down from the incapacitating terror that had come from knowing me.

"Oh, baby. Oh, baby," I murmured in her ear, over and over again, while my own hands fisted against her, restraining themselves from harming her in my desire to feel her close to me, to bury her inside me and protect her. I relished the sharp intakes of air against my skin because it meant she was still here with me in some way.

"I-I felt claustro- claust-"

"Claustrophobic?" I prompted.

She nodded furiously against me. "Without you there, I couldn't." She shuddered. "I was so scared."

"I'm so sorry," I breathed, unable to communicate how true those words were in my desolate shape.

"I'm no good for you," she said in a broken whisper.

"You are!" I cried adamantly, grabbing her face and forcing her to look at me. "You are all I've ever wanted, every part of you. The good and the bad. This... This is nothing. We can work with this."

"How?" Fresh tears filled her eyes. "I don't know what I'm doing. I can't even function right. I'm like a little girl, emotionally stunted and terrified of everything."

"So?" I responded. "You've come so far, love. Don't give up on us now."

"Don't make me go out there alone again."

I tried to smile at her, but my body was still so locked down with fear, it didn't really work properly. "That's a bit unrealistic," I said softly. "But I won't just shove you out the door with Emmett and expect you to be all right. Ever."

"I'm sorry I'm not the strong, refined girl you deserve," she sniffled.

"Isabella," I said tenderly. "You're _more_ than I deserve because you're real. Don't ever forget that."

Her chin trembled, and she nodded. "I love you."

I groaned and brought her down so that I could taste her lips. "I love you." I pulled back and laid my forehead on hers. "Are you all right now?"

She nodded. "I don't know what happened. I got off the phone with Reneé, and it was like everything I was so scared of before came hurtling at me. It was worse than I'd ever imagined, going out there and facing it all without you. You ground me, Edward. I don't know how else to say it." She let out her breath slowly. "What am I going to do? I can't_ not_ go to class."

"I'll come with you." She stared at me in disbelief. "At least until you're more comfortable with this. I know you'll be able to walk out there and talk to the press just as I do someday. I've seen glimpses of that confident woman lurking inside you, you just need to believe it yourself."

"You think?" she asked, a spark of hope igniting in those gorgeous brown eyes of hers.

"I know. This is simply a setback. And I blame your mother entirely," I growled.

"My mom?"

"You were there with me, in every way. You were ready to marry me and commit yourself to me. You were ready to stand in front of the world and be photographed with me. You even agreed to be my agent. Then you spoke to your mother... and now we are here."

"You're right," she said, sounding a little awed. "I told her to forget I existed."

My eyes widened in shock. "Good for you."

"Thanks." She gave me a small smile.

I thought it best to lighten things up a bit. "If you don't mind, I'd like to get off this disgusting floor and go murder your mother now."

She giggled, but it wasn't the airy sound I loved so much. It was still weighed down by the emotions she'd succumbed to today. "You can't. She's pregnant."

"Damn," I teased. "Perhaps after that little boy gets here, eh?"

"Maybe." She tilted her head and looked at me funny. "Edward Anthony Masen, are you wearing _makeup_?"

I wiped my cheek and saw a bit of the tawny powder rub off on my fingertips. "I wasn't really worried about taking off my makeup before I left the photo shoot," I laughed. "I was a little more involved with running to this gorgeous brunette who is determined to stop my heart."

"I won't do it again," she swore, looking down in shame.

"Hey," I whispered. "It's all right," I reminded her.

"Yeah."

"What do you say we skip class and practice your time in front of the camera instead?" I asked, quirking my brow.

"What do you mean?"

"Let's go to the beach and take a walk. I've got a couple of sweatshirts and a blanket in the car and the press is all out there waiting for us to step foot off university ground. Let's make today your first lesson on how to deal with the insanity that comes with being with me."

_Because I should have never sent you out there unprepared like I did..._

She smiled slowly. "Okay."

I helped her up off the floor and went to wash my face.

Bella stood next to me and gasped at her appearance. "Oh, my God! I'm all splotchy and swollen! I look horrible!" she shrieked.

I chuckled. "You look wonderful." I reached on and traced the black design on the shirt she had on. "This makes your tits look incredible."

"Tits." She snorted and shook her head in disbelief.

"What?" I smiled innocently.

"You're fucking full of shit, that's what." She splashed some water on her face. "I can't go out there like this." She stared at me for a second and shook her head. "Here, let me get it. You've got makeup running down your face."

She gently took a paper towel and wiped the excess makeup off my face. When she was finished, I bent down and kissed her. "Thank you," I murmured.

She rolled her eyes. "Boys. What would they do without girls?"

"I've no idea."

"Speaking of girls, you're in the ladies room." She waggled her eyebrows. "You know what everyone's going to think we did in here."

I flashed her a crooked grin. "Let them."

Bella and I cautiously went back outside, only for Emmett to rush her and throw her over his shoulder like some deranged kidnapper.

"You stupid bitch!" he roared. "I was out here freaking out! Don't ever do that shit to me again, do you hear me?"

I almost laughed at his reaction. I wasn't sure if she realized it or not, but he was her family. Their dynamic was very much of an older brother with his younger sister. He mocked her and joked with her, but obviously loved her just as much as Rosalie did.

"I-I'm sorry, Emmett. Put me down," she mumbled, slapping his back. "You're embarrassing me."

He obliged, cradling her face in his large hands. "You're okay? Rosie will fucking castrate me if you're not."

"I'm fine. Won't happen again, I swear."

"It better not," he warned. "No amount of money pretty boy over there pays me is worth going through that again." He crushed her to his chest and took a deep breath of relief. "God, I nearly pissed myself I was so fucking scared."

"I'm sorry," she repeated, no doubt mortified.

"Are you going to class now?" he asked, glancing at me and abruptly stepping back. "Fuck, ah, you don't think... I mean..."

"It's all right, Emmett," I told him sincerely. "You've no idea how grateful I am that I hired someone to protect Bella that cares for her so."

He nodded and waited for Bella to answer.

"No, I don't think I could concentrate if I did. I think I'm just going to go with Edward. You go on ahead. We'll try this again tomorrow."

He rocked on his heels while his eyes darted between us. "I don't know..."

She sighed in exasperation. "Go to fucking class, you big ape. I'll be fine."

Emmett relented and walked away in the direction of his own class, allowing Bella to finally notice the spectators around us, murmuring to one another.

"Oh, shit," she whispered, backing up into me.

I chuckled and spun her around. "Lesson number one," I told her, cupping her face in my hand. "Camera phones are your worst enemy. They'll sneak up and bite you in the arse every time."

"So I...?"

"Always think before you speak and never act out on any of those uncivilized thoughts that may be burning your brain," I answered, running my thumb across her cheek.

She leaned into my touch and closed her eyes. That one small movement was my undoing. Electricity crackled and sparked between us, thrumming steadily in the air and causing my breathing to speed in response. She licked her lips as the urge to consume overtook her as well, and I felt all my blood run south as my body hardened for her. I suddenly longed to throw her against the wall and drive myself into her in an attempt to satisfy the ache that came from desiring her.

But I would never do that. Too many things could go wrong with that scenario.

I swallowed thickly and focused on clearing my head of the wondrous fog she'd created. "Like now," I whispered, quickly stepping away from her. "We should go before I do something we both regret."

She nodded with a knowing smile, and I reluctantly draped my arm around her shoulders and waved pleasantly at the people surrounding us. We started toward my car but didn't get far before I felt Bella tense against me.

"Can you do this?" I questioned.

She nodded and wrapped her arms around my waist, holding onto me tightly. "It's just... it's right there," she breathed. "I can feel it in my chest."

"Panic."

"Yeah."

"Think back to the other afternoon when we stood in front of an army of photographers while I listened to that overenthusiastic salesman go on and on and on about some hideous Motorola he was determined to sell."

She giggled. "I ignored him. Sorry."

"Lucky you," I said wryly, squeezing her shoulder with my hand. "You were so calm, so unconcerned with what was happening. I know what you're capable of."

"Why are you being so patient with me?" she asked incredulously. "A lot of people would have just said 'fuck it' by now."

"I'm so patient with you because I love you. And, Bella, you got scared, but you didn't run," I explained.

She stopped abruptly and stared up at me. "It never even crossed my mind."

I beamed at her. "Progress."

We came into view, and the entire group of press that had been hovering around Emmett's Jeep came flying up to us with unimaginable speed.

"Here we go, love," I said lowly.

She took a deep breath and unbelievably, broke free from my grasp, opting to take my hand instead.

"Where did my terrified fiancée go?" I teased.

"I'm not going to let it get to me again. It was stupid in the first place. I can't panic any time you're not near." She hesitated, and then let go of my hand so that we were no longer touching at all.

"I'm not sure I like that," I admitted, curling my now empty fingers into my palm. "You could fall or be shoved or-"

She put her hand over my mouth and smiled. "Stop it. You're almost as bad as me."

"Yes, well, I'm not in need of meds," I quipped.

She giggled. "You suck."

"Only on certain areas of one specific woman." She reddened, and I laughed. "Come on. Get in the car before they start after you. I'll handle it."

I got her safely in the car and then turned to face the demands behind me with the most winning smile I could muster, given how incredibly strained I still was from seeing Bella on the floor like that. Not including the fact that my body still burned for her.

An involuntary shudder went through me as I relived that moment. I'd spend the rest of my life making sure that scene never happened again. My Bella deserved to be nothing less than happy with me, and if she couldn't find a way to cope with the paparazzi that were determined to follow her from now on, well, I'd buy a ranch in Montana so that we weren't in the heart of the entertainment business anymore.

Bella was the most important thing in my life now. My life was void without her.

"Eric," I greeted. "How're you this morning?"

"Good. You ever going to tell us what's going on with you and your assistant? Your publicist gave us some bullshit statement over the weekend that didn't confirm or deny anything."

I laughed. "That's her job, is it not?"

"It is. So what's the deal?"

"Simply put, the deal is that I'm in a relationship with Bella," I answered.

"Behind Tanya's back?" he inquired.

"I'm not going to answer that again. I will tell you that I'm happy now, Eric. Happier than I've ever been."

He grinned widely. "She's going to shit when she reads that."

I smiled wickedly in return. "Make sure you have your camera ready for that. I'd love to see it."

He laughed. "Well, I'm officially 'Team Edward'."

My brow furrowed. "'Team Edward'? What is that?"

"Dude, check the internet. There are people selling t-shirts that say 'Team Edward' and 'Team Tanya' on them. I think there might even be some with your girl's face on them."

I groaned. "Oh, she's going to love that."

"Why?"

"She's not interested in being a celebrity. But I suppose it can't be helped so long as she's with me."

"No. So where are you off to?"

"The beach. Venice, perhaps. I'm not sure."

He nodded.

"Keep your distance, please," I requested of them all. "She's not used to all of this and is still trying to adjust."

They didn't answer but then again, I hadn't expected them to.

I climbed into the car and started it, backing out carefully before I said anything to Bella.

"Do a Google search on the Blackberry," I instructed, "for 'Team Edward'."

She blanched as her mind raced with the possibilities but looked it up regardless. "Oh, God."

"That bad?"

She nodded. "There are shirts with our faces on them!" she screeched. "In every fucking color imaginable! They're _everywhere_!"

"Let's buy a couple," I suggested.

She looked at me like I'd just grown another head. "What for?"

"Embrace the madness."

She sat in silence for a moment before she dissolved into a fit of helpless laughter. I kept glancing over at her, waiting for her to explain, but she could only wave at me while she wiped her tears.

She finally sobered enough to speak to me in between giggles."I'm sorry. It's just..." She took a deep breath. "It's so ridiculous. Jesus, you're a lot of trouble."

I knew she was only teasing me, but it didn't stop the sharp sting that rushed through me. "Is it worth it?" I asked quietly.

"Yes. Yes, Edward. You're worth it." She giggled, obviously in a much better mood now. "I sound like one of those L'Oreal commercials," she snickered.

I reached over and took her hand, bringing it to my mouth and pressing a kiss on her palm. "I'm glad you're back to being you. You scared me there, love."

"Sorry. God, I feel like that's all I'm saying today." She shifted in the seat toward me. "I told you, you ground me, Edward. It's so empowering to be around you. I feel like I'm invincible, fearless. The moment I saw your green eyes staring down at me, I instantly felt better and slowly came out of whatever-it-was that I was in."

I didn't have words to express the way that made me feel, so I simply smiled at her quickly before turning my attention to the road. Bella closed her eyes and curled up in the seat with her head resting on the cup holders; it looked incredibly uncomfortable, but I kept quiet.

She'd lain there for so long, I thought she was talking in her sleep when she finally broke the silence. "Edward," she mumbled sleepily.

I stroked her face with my hand and said nothing in return.

"Let's elope."


	22. Chapter 22

**Thanks for all the reviews and recent interest I've gotten in this story. **

**Thanks to Stratan for beta'ing this bad boy... I'm sure HE's (*snickers at my lack of proofreading* It's fixed! Haha) wishing these two would quit being so damn wordy. So would I, actually, but that's beside the point. 8K chapters are killing me...**

**BtSatM readers: 4500 words have been written. I have one more scene to write and then it'll be sent to Stratan. Daddyward will make an appearance with the ever adorable Claire :)**

**The Twilighted thread, Twitter, and blog information are all on my profile, as usual. **

**To elope, or not to elope... Find out here.**

***IF YOU'VE GOTTEN THIS ALREADY, IGNORE ME... FF IS APPARENTLY ON FAIL AGAIN.***

* * *

Chapter 22

**Edward**

The car jerked with my shock, and a thrill went through me at the thought of dropping everything and marrying Bella immediately. I straightened it out before I could cause any harm. "What?" I asked quietly, uncertain if she actually was asleep or not.

She stirred and reached out to put her hand on my thigh. "I don't want a big wedding. I just want to marry you. Let's elope."

"Bella, I..."

God, I wanted it, but I was terrified that this was simply a reaction to her mother and the events that had happened today. I didn't want her to feel as if she needed to try to make up for panic attack earlier; it was completely unnecessary. I debated briefly on my answer, and then decided to just be honest with her.

"I want to marry you more than anything in this world, but I don't think we should rush into anything. After everything that's happened today-"

"It's not that." She got up and stared at me, and I had to refrain from laughing at the angry, red line slashing across her cheek from lying down on the hard console for so long. "I don't want a big, fancy wedding. I don't want to plan for months over something that will be over in fifteen minutes. I don't want to have to worry about trying to keep the date hidden from the press or hiring security so that no one ruins the ceremony. Let's go someplace, say 'I do', and tell all these other jackasses to 'fuck off'."

I ran my hand through my hair. "I think you should think about it for a while."

"You don't want to?" She looked a bit miffed.

I parked and pulled the brake before I turned to face her and prayed I was conveying my complete sincerity to her. "I want to. You've no idea how much that statement is true. Hearing you tell me that you want to go get married right now, it's... Well, it's unfathomable, really, to know that you feel as I do. As strongly as I do.

"But I don't want you to look back ten years from now and regret not having your father there or not having Alice help you plan it--because, love, she'll want to be involved. I want our wedding day to be absolutely perfect. I want you to be without any doubts when you marry me. I don't want you to feel obligated to give me this because it's something I've wanted for so long. I waited all this time for you and now that I have you, that time is inconsequential to me."

She reached out and pushed a fallen piece of hair off my forehead. "I don't think I'm going to change my mind."

"Just take a few weeks to decide. If you still want to, we will. I promise."

She bit her lip and studied me momentarily before nodding. "You'd better think of a good place to go, because this is what I want," she said stubbornly.

I chuckled. "Fine. I'll start looking for destinations. Which do you prefer? The romance of Paris? Or the beaches of the Caribbean?"

"I don't care. Give me you, a dress, and a preacher, and I'll be good to go."

"Amen to that," I said lightly.

She glanced around our surroundings. "Where is everyone?"

"I've no idea. I asked them to keep their distance. Well, beseeched, I think would be a more appropriate term. We should take advantage, though. Get settled before they arrive?"

She nodded and glanced around the small car. "Where's that stuff you were talking about?"

"Behind my seat."

I reached back and pulled out a blue sweatshirt and handed it to her before I got the black one I constantly wore and the blanket. I slipped the sweatshirt on awkwardly, trying not to hit Bella in the face with my ridiculously long arms, and pulled the hood over my head before reaching out and doing the same for Bella.

"Why the hoods?"

"Well, if they've not really arrived yet, it'll give us a few extra moments of peace before they realize we're the two morons huddled in the sand," I explained.

"Morons?" She arched her brow. "Speak for yourself."

I laughed. "It's quite chilly today, and the breeze coming off the ocean will only make it worse." I frowned. "This was possibly not my brightest idea," I admitted.

She rolled her eyes with a grin and reached out for the door handle; I followed suit.

We walked toward the shore, hand in hand, and she nudged me with her shoulder to get my attention. "Why do you have all this shit in the back of your car, anyway?"

"I try to be prepared for every paparazzi scenario," I replied. "It always amazes me how I can manage to get lost in a crowd with just a few simple changes like a hooded sweatshirt to cover my infamous hair and hide my face."

"It does seem awfully simple," she agreed. "What else do you do?"

I shrugged. "I change my gait--make it shorter. I also hunch down a bit so that I don't seem quite as tall and make my movements less fluid. I suppose it's a bit like losing yourself in a character. I do it on the red carpet as well. Instead of becoming invisible, I become larger than life. A bit like the cocky bloke you thought I'd be before you actually knew me."

"Hmm." She bit her lip thoughtfully. "Interesting. You're like a chameleon."

"I have to be. Otherwise, I'd have no privacy whatsoever. No one truly knows the real me, outside of you and my family, because I've worked so hard to maintain that barrier between my life and the public. It sounds like I don't like this part of my career, and that's not what I'm saying at all. I simply found it easier to let the world believe I'm something entirely different. You'd be surprised at how few stalkers I've had because I'm so guarded."

"Weren't you lonely?"

"Very much so," I responded as I laid out the blanket on the golden sand. "That's probably one of the reasons why once I realized I was so in love with you, I pushed for us to be together. I couldn't let you go. Not after living for so long without having that true feeling of love in my life."

She sat down and smiled up at me. "Like I said at Volterra, I'm glad you did. If you hadn't, I'd probably still be in denial and would have missed out on so much with you."

I sat next to her and skimmed my finger over her cheek. "And I'm glad you feel that way. Tell me," I said, changing the subject, "what exactly was that display earlier between you and Zafrina."

She blushed yet groaned with obvious exasperation. Talk about a dichotomy. "I don't like her."

"That was quite evident, Bella," I said dryly. "But why? Zafrina's really very kind and smart. I think the two of you have a lot in common."

"More than you know," she mumbled under her breath.

"I'm sorry?" I leaned my ear toward her teasingly. "Old man, here. You really must learn to speak up, Miss Swan."

She laughed once and shook her head. "I said 'more than you know'," she shouted.

"Ah, see, that I understood perfectly." I grinned crookedly at her, getting the satisfaction of watching her eyes glaze over as I did; I don't think I could ever tired of eliciting that reaction from her. "Why's that?"

"She loves you," she answered simply.

I choked and sputtered with those words so much, Bella reached over and smacked my back. Hard. I cleared my throat and tried to get a handle on myself. "That's rubbish," I finally rasped. "She's a friend."

"Maybe to you."

"Bella, don't be absurd. Even if this was true, I only have feelings for one person. And I'm looking at her."

She wrung her hands together awkwardly. "Just don't... um, don't hurt me."

"Bella," I said gently. "I've known Zafrina for years. Don't you think if I were going to develop feelings for her it would have been before now?"

"I guess so," she muttered.

"Look at me." She kept her face hidden, so I grabbed her chin and jerked it toward me irritably. "Why are you second guessing how vital you are to me?"

"It just doesn't make sense. You're... you and I'm..." She didn't finish.

"You're incredibly beautiful, intelligent, witty, and for the most part, have this innate confidence about you--all those things you told your mother. Don't let her ignorance and narrow-minded views of life affect you."

A tear slid down her cheek. "I'm sorry. I'm having a rough day," she said with a small laugh. "Jealousy, a panic attack, and self-loathing will do that to you."

I sighed and said nothing in return; instead, I simply threw my arm around her and hugged her against me. She was going to have to learn to be true to herself on her own.

We sat like that for a while, staring at the ocean and relaxing with the lull of the waves crashing against the shore. Seagulls called around us, and a pelican dove into the water in the distance. It was utterly serene and unbelievably perfect.

It didn't last long, though.

Bella and I heard the noise behind us as camera crews set up a few feet away. She tensed up again, and I rubbed her arm soothingly, but as the crowd slowly crept closer and spectators and fans came to see what the commotion was about, she became more and more fidgety in my arms.

I laid us down and hovered over her, making sure that my position wasn't improper, merely relaxed. I stared down at her until she finally gazed back up at me.

"You and me," I said sternly. "There's no one else here."

"That's a load of crap. There's a ton of people here."

A couple of girls started screaming my name as they rushed over to me, unfortunately proving her point. I smiled up at them and kept my expression as friendly as possible.

"Hello," I greeted.

"Oh, my God. I am such a huge fan!" The little blond clapped her hands unconsciously with her excitement. "We heard you guys were here and had to come see if we could meet you."

I chuckled a little at her earnestness. "It's a pleasure to meet you. Want a picture or an autograph?" I inquired.

The red head next to her squealed in delight. "Can we? Oh, my God, you're so great!" she gushed.

I sat up and waited for them to give me the magazines they had in their hand and a black marker. I opened the pen and looked up at them. "What's your name?"

"Amy," the blond answered giddily.

"Tarah."

I nodded and scribbled a quick message and signed my name to each of their magazines before handing them back to the girls and standing up. I dusted myself off as Amy handed Bella a camera.

I posed with them, said a brief goodbye and sat back down, expecting them to leave, but instead they implored further by requesting a photo of Bella as well.

"You want a _what_?" Bella asked shrilly. "I don't... I'm not... Why?"

"You're so pretty! And you're Edward's girlfriend, right?" Tarah asked.

"That I am." She shifted uncomfortably.

I smiled encouragingly, and Bella reluctantly got up and let me take a couple of pictures with the girls before plopping back down next to me.

"Thanks!" they shouted together as they raced back to their car.

"You're so good with your fans." Bella shook her head. "I don't know how you can be so genuine with people you don't know."

"It makes me happy to see others happy. Whether it's from randomly spotting me somewhere, waiting in line to meet me, or watching one of my films, I enjoy knowing that I can bring a smile to someone's face. Even if it's just for a moment."

She sighed. "It's going to be so hard to get used to being asked for things like that. I love seeing you with them, but me... not so much."

I chuckled and leaned forward to kiss her. "You'll adjust. I know you will. And remember, Alice said all we need to do is get through this first bit..."

She licked her lips, and her eyes darted between my own lips and eyes. "I want to kiss you, but all these people..."

"Just you and me," I reminded her. "Ignore everything around you and focus on _your_ life. None of this matters. It could be here one day and the next-"

"Poof."

"Exactly," I murmured.

I brushed my lips against hers, making sure she wouldn't panic or react negatively in any way, before letting my tongue trace over her lips. She parted them and kissed me back, hesitantly bringing her hand up to my jaw. I didn't let the kiss last long before I broke away from her, because I would never snog Bella in public; it was nobody's business what I did in private.

I opened my eyes and examined her, smiling at the tinge of pink in her cheeks from our public display of affection.

"That wasn't so bad, was it?" I asked.

She shook her head. "No. But it wasn't the same as when we're alone."

"And for good reason. I could get arrested for my body's response to your lips."

It continued like that for the rest of the afternoon. We were watched and filmed while fans gathered round to catch a glimpse of us. Occasionally, someone would brave walking over to us and ask for an autograph or a picture, but mainly everyone left us alone. I used the opportunity to help Bella grasp how unimportant all of this was in the grand scheme of things and that as promised, I would eventually retire and this would no longer be a normality in our lives.

She laughed softly at some incredibly silly comment I made about her desire to elope--I was trying to make sure she knew just how extremely interested I was in that but wanted to keep a light banter so that she didn't feel pressured into making some sort of firm decision--and started to no doubt say something snarky in return, but she was interrupted by the sound of my mobile vibrating on the ground next to us.

"Z," I answered.

"Edward, what part of lay low did you and Bella not understand?"

I chuckled. "Something came up. Bella-" I broke off at Bella's look of panic and flailing arms. "Just a minute."

I put Zafrina on hold and looked at Bella strangely. "Are you trying to take off and fly?"

"No, dummy. Don't say anything about my panic attack. Please." Her eyes were pleading.

"Why ever not?"

"Because, I don't want to give her any ammunition against me."

"Bella," I groaned. "Be reasonable."

"Please," she whispered.

I sighed and resumed my conversation with Zafrina. "I thought it would be best to give Bella an afternoon in front of the press with me before she went somewhere other than university alone. I'm simply being an overbearing arse. Bella's made that perfectly clear this afternoon," I lied.

"Thank you," Bella mouthed.

I simply held my finger up to her in response, silently telling her I had something to say to her.

"Well, could you please go back home? You're not helping the situation," she laughed.

"All right, heading that way now."

"Thank you."

I slipped the mobile back in my pocket and stood up, reaching out to take Bella's hand. I pulled her up and kissed her nose. "We've been instructed to go home."

"Oh."

"Apparently, an afternoon on the beach is not considered lying low."

She giggled. "I did not know this."

"Neither did I." I grinned crookedly and gathered up the blanket. "Care to tell me why I lied to my publicist?"

"I told you, I don't want her to have anything to use against me."

"Stop being so bloody absurd, Bella. There's nothing there," I said in frustration.

"You didn't see her looks, Edward. You didn't catch the glimpse of disappointment and... and _pain_ in her eyes when you called me 'love'. I saw her flirting with you when she thought I wasn't around. She thinks I'm nothing--that I can't handle any of this--and I'll be damned if I prove her right by telling her about my panic attack today. She loves you, Edward. I don't know why she's never admitted it, but she does. I'm jealous, yes, but more importantly, it makes me feel like I have to defend myself and your love for me to an employee of yours, and I _despise_ it."

I nodded in concession. I wouldn't argue with Bella when she was so impassioned by something; it would do me no good.

I thought through my response carefully. "I want you to know that you've nothing to fear. I would never put our relationship in jeopardy, and if Zafrina truly feels for me the way you think she does, it's completely unrequited. Do you remember the words you spoke to me when you finally admitted you feelings for me?"

"Yes."

I placed my hand over hers on my chest and let her feel the beating of my heart. "And just like you told me, this is yours. It beats for you alone. You mean more to me than I could ever verbally explain. Without you, it would no longer have the strength to beat, and I would cease to exist." I bent down and kissed her gently and felt her sigh wash across my face. "My life is in your hands."

"Okay. Let's go eat. I'm suddenly famished," she said, lightening things up. "What do you want?"

I blinked at her ability to randomly change the mood. "Bella à la mode," I finally answered wickedly.

"Well, you can't have desert first," she giggled.

"Says who?"

"Says me."

"That's bollocks. And I'm the one driving."

"Not anymore!"

She snatched my keys out of my hand and took off toward the car. I stood there, too stunned to move, and then chased after her. She squealed in delight as I reached for her and jerked her hand away from me before I could get the keys.

She danced away from me, laughing, and managed to somehow get in the car and lock the door before I could get to her.

"Bella!" I grinned. "Open the door!"

She shook her head. "Nope. You're walking, buddy."

I leaned down and snarled at her playfully. "Open the bloody door before I get mobbed by photographers!"

She tapped her finger on her lips. "Okay. But you have to sit there." She pointed to the passenger's seat.

I shook my head. "Fine. Be careful with her, though. She's my baby."

She snorted. "I'm not going to wreck your car. Just get in. I want sushi. A Godzilla roll."

I laughed. "Sushi it is."

* * *

**Bella**

Sleep eluded me.

I stayed with Edward, because he seemed to need my presence as reassurance that I wasn't going to have another fucking mental breakdown. I felt so incredibly guilty for putting him through that earlier. The look on his face as he crouched down over me would haunt me forever. He was so tormented, so pained by what he saw.

I never wanted to see it again.

And I still had no idea why I'd reacted so strongly to the paparazzi.

Now, I was fine. Now, I was looking for a way to keep myself from ever doing that again. Not just for Edward, but because I never wanted to feel like that again.

I shuddered involuntarily as the memory of fear slid down my spine.

Sighing, I twisted free from Edward's firm grasp and quietly left the bedroom, motioning for Samson to come with me.

I went to the kitchen and made some chamomile tea, doing it exactly as Edward had taught me--because it really was better this way--before padding outside with the dog and sitting in one of the chaise lounges with a blanket. I stared up at the dark sky and willed myself calm so that I could sleep and function tomorrow. Tomorrow, I was determined to get through an afternoon of lectures and studying without any worry of photographers and reporters.

But most importantly, without Edward.

I couldn't let him baby me. I couldn't let him stop living his own individual life because he fell in love with a disaster. And while I knew I'd relish the calming effect he had on me, I couldn't use him as a crutch to get through this. I had to learn how to do it on my own; I'd managed to do everything in my life so far on my own. Why should this be any different?

I realized, in a way, I needed to thank Reneé for being such a shitty parent. I am who I am today because I wasn't molded by someone else's views on life or hopes for what I would become. I became the Bella Swan that the amazing bronze-haired god sleeping inside fell in love with because of my strength and aspirations to make something of myself. I wanted to give my own children as much love and support as I had in me, but I wanted them to feel that satisfaction that came with being independent.

Aside from the soul-rejoicing love that Edward gave me, it was the best feeling I'd ever known. To accomplish something--on your own.

Samson picked his head up off the ground and growled lowly, alerting me to someone's presence. My eyes darted around the backyard, and my body coiled to spring up and run without a moment's hesitation. Only when Samson started wagging his tail happily, did I relax.

"You fucker. You scared the hell out of me," I snapped at him.

"It's only me," Edward said softly. "What are you doing up? It's three in the morning."

I put my tea on the table and turned to face him. The look of intense worry on his face pierced right through me, and I wanted to somehow take it all away and make the ugliness he'd witnessed in me disappear from his thoughts completely. I wanted to run away with him and make him mine in every way and see the breathtaking, crooked grin that crossed his face when we said our vows together.

Shit, he was right. I needed to give it some time. My determination to acclimate myself to the situation and my feelings of marrying him were all tangled together like a long forgotten garden being suffocated by weeds.

I knew I wanted to elope; it was so fitting for us, but I wanted him to know it was because I was so in love with him that I just couldn't wait anymore to give him the future he wanted. Not because the air hadn't cleared on my fight with my mother or because I was still reeling from a panic attack. When I mentioned it the next time, it would be final.

I sighed and gave him a small smile. "I couldn't sleep. I thought maybe some tea would help but..."

He sat next to me warily. "What do you need?" he breathed. "What do you need to come back to me, love?"

"I'm here, baby," I promised, resting my head on his chest and letting the slow rhythmic beating of his heart comfort me. "I've just got a lot on my mind."

His arms tightened around me, pressing me into him. "Talk to me. Please," he begged in a strangled voice.

"I need to get through this on my own."

His entire body locked down for a second before he abruptly dropped his arms and scooted away from me. "I understand," he said stoically. "I'll be here when you figure it out, though."

I stared at him in confusion, trying to read something on his unemotional face, but he refused to look at me. With a startled gasp, I realized he thought I was breaking up with him.

"No!" I cried out, frantically reaching for him. "I need to face the press alone! I'm not going anywhere, Edward. I just don't want you to baby me through this. I need to figure it out for myself."

The look of relief on his face was tangible, and my eyes swam with tears in response. "Oh, thank God," he whispered. "I thought you'd changed your mind. About me. Us. Everything."

I shook my head vehemently, too worked up to make my voice work. I'd hurt him so much today, and I couldn't seem to stop.

"Don't cry." He reached out and wiped away my tears.

"I can't help it. I just keep hurting you. I'm sorry," I sobbed, trembling slightly.

"You aren't hurting me," he said in assurance. "But I'm terribly worried about you." He pulled me against him and we both breathed in deeply together. "You want to face the press alone?" he prompted.

"Yeah. I've done everything myself for as long as I can remember. I appreciate that you want to be there for me and guide me through this, but it's the only way I know how to cope. To push everything aside and face it alone."

"Bella, I don't know if I can let you do that. After all I saw this afternoon-"

"Do you trust me?" I interrupted.

He frowned. "Of course I do."

"Then, please. Let me do this on my own. I can do this without panicking. I know I can," I said emphatically.

He stared at me, silently pleading with his eyes to let him accompany me to class tomorrow, but I wouldn't budge. I didn't know how.

"All right," he finally said regretfully. "I'm only a phone call away. Remember that."

"I know." I smiled at him and yawned, feeling a like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders.

"Come to bed," he instructed. "You need your rest."

"Yes, father," I said with a roll of my eyes.

He curled his lip back. "No father jokes. That's rather horrifying, don't you think?"

"Nope. You can be my daddy anytime." I ran my hand down his stomach suggestively.

His brow arched, and his eyes darkened. "Now, love?"

I grinned playfully at him. "Now's good for me."

He changed spots with me and had me straddling his lap in a move so fast, I was dazed. I leaned down and kissed him gently, savoring the way he tasted and felt his strong muscles ripple and strain under my fingers as I explored his perfect form.

He cupped my breast through my t-shirt, and my entire body exploded with heat. I moaned into his mouth and everything between us shifted. I ground my hips into his as his kiss became needy and desperate and his teasing touch verged on the point of pain.

I arched my back and threw my head back as white-hot bolts of pleasure raced through my veins and electricity sparked between us, nearly taking my breath away with its intensity. His hands came to rest on my hips, kneading into the soft flesh and directing my movements on top of him while his mouth raked over my skin, leaving a burning, tender wake behind his skilled tongue.

He ripped my shirt off, and I gasped as he bit down and toyed with my nipple. I wrapped my fingers in his hair and pulled in an effort to ground myself against the needful, driving ache that I had for him.

He broke free, staring up at me with wild eyes and grinned the sexiest smile I'd ever seen. My breath hitched, and my cheeks burned with the knowledge that it was meant solely for me.

He stroked me through my panties and the smile grew even more pronounced. "Fuck, Isabella. I need you," he murmured, lifting his hips off the cushion and pushing himself against me.

I smothered an embarrassingly loud groan at the sound of the word "fuck" rolling off his tongue like that. It was erotic and heady, unexpected and hotter than hell.

He ripped away my panties, and a small giggle escaped me. "You're going to have to quit ruining my clothes," I chided impishly.

He shook his head with a smirk and moved his sweatpants down so that I could bring myself down on him. I locked my gaze with his, and we groaned simultaneously as we were brought together. I rocked my hips against him and felt him twitch inside me.

"You like that?"

"Yes," he ground out. "God, yes."

He pushed me back so that I was bracing myself with my hands on each side of his knees and gripped my thighs as he stared down at where we were joined. I bit my lip as he slid slowly inside me, his ever-darkening gaze never moving from the most intimate part of my body. I was baring more to him than I'd ever imagined myself doing before and in that instant, I knew that every unspoken moment that passed between us, every "I love you", would never convey how deep my feelings ran for him.

_You own me._

Our words came flooding back to me, and I smiled as I realized how true they actually were.

I brought one hand up and traced the outline of his defined muscles, slowly making my way down his body while he continued to move fluidly inside me until I reached his dick and felt him glide in between my fingers.

He grunted his approval and brought me down on him harder, faster. Heat flooded my face and sweat beaded my brow as he brought me closer and closer to peak. He shifted and thrust into me, causing me to cry out as a wave of pleasure rolled through me so fierce, I quaked above him as I climaxed.

He hugged me against him as his orgasm claimed him, clinging to me and driving into me one final time as his beautiful, guttural moan was breathed into my ear.

I swallowed thickly and nuzzled into his neck. "You're all right?" he whispered in my ear before he placed a kiss on my temple.

"Great. Just wondering if fucking in your backyard was the best idea or not," I answered honestly.

He chuckled and let his hands skim over my back, inducing chills. "It's after three. I highly doubt we've been spied on. However, if I find out otherwise, believe me when I say that my lawyer will make sure those photographs never see the light of day."

The comfort I felt from his words was instantaneous. "Oh, okay."

I inhaled deeply and closed my eyes while I melted against him. He brought the blanket up over our bodies and simply held me. His touch drove the events of the day from my mind and before I knew it, I was slipping into an exhausted sleep, preciously cradled in his arms.

* * *

I woke up with my arm stretched out over Edward's cold, empty side of the bed, almost as if he'd rolled right out from under me at some point this morning. Yawning, I turned my head to look at the clock and frowned when I saw it wasn't even seven. Why I was up already after such a late night was beyond me, but here I was, wide awake and dealing with a nervous fluttering in my stomach.

Stupid fucking press.

I got up and threw my t-shirt back on before going into the bathroom to brush my teeth and attend to my ritualistic morning human needs.

I roamed the house in search for Edward and eventually heard the drumming sound of his feet hitting the treadmill as he ran in the basement. It had been so long since he'd actually gotten up and followed his old routine, I was a little surprised to see him at it so early in the morning; he usually waited until I was busying myself with something before he took the time to work out.

I went into the kitchen and grinned stupidly at the sight of breakfast waiting for me on the stove. I scooped up a warm piece of bacon and nibbled on it while I poured myself a cup of coffee. Edward always made sure that my needs were met, including the caffeine fix he knew I'd need this morning.

I ate breakfast and texted Emmett, asking him to meet me in the parking lot this morning before my first class instead of here at the house. I figured this way, if I needed to flee the scene, I could do so without imposing on anyone.

But I was determined not to let that happen.

I cleaned up the kitchen and went to take a shower. I could hear the clinking of Edward's weights as I passed the basement door and wondered how long he planned to stay down there. I wanted to at least see him before I left for class.

I showered and dressed quickly so that I could check Edward's e-mail and the list of things I needed to do this afternoon--if there was one--and also spend a few minutes checking for any homework assignments due tomorrow since I missed every single class yesterday. Not to mention study Edward's contract for _Rogue_ again since I had a meeting set up for Friday.

_Shit._

That made those annoying flutters in my stomach grow to the point of nausea.

I stepped out of the bathroom and stopped short at the sight of Edward's now destroyed room. There were clothes in stacks on the bed and random drawers left open. The light in Edward's closet burned brightly, casting shadows on the floor of his hurried movements inside.

I walked over and gaped as he started throwing shit on the floor. He worked in a frenzy, moving stuff around and emptying one side of the closet while he was still dripping with sweat from exerting himself downstairs.

Whoa.

He noticed me and reached up to grab a box from the top shelf. "Hi," he said distractedly.

"What the hell are you doing?" I questioned.

"Reorganizing."

"Reorganizing," I repeated. "Why?"

"I'm making space for you."

"Wait, what?" I backed up in disbelief. "All this mess is to make space for me?"

He nodded and sorted through an already insanely organized drawer. "You need to have a place to store your belongings. I thought of simply emptying a drawer for you but decided it wasn't enough."

"My bag is fine, Edward. You didn't need to destroy your room for me."

He scowled and looked around. "It needed to be done anyway. I've not done it in a few months. Besides, where are you going to store your clothes and whatnot after we're married?"

OCD rears its ugly head...

"Uh, according to you, we're not getting married any time soon."

"I never said that," he argued. "I merely asked for you to be sure of your decision."

"Well, I am."

"Well, all right then." He paused mid-step. "Did we just agree to elope?"

I laughed in shock. "I think we did."

His responding smile was intoxicatingly beautiful but quickly faded. "Not until the interest in our relationship has died down. I'd like for it to actually be a secret. And we need to devise a plan to tell our families. And prepare for Alice's inevitable call."

There was something increasingly worrying about his behavior. His movements were stiff and jerky and his eyes roamed around the space like he'd misplaced something important. The faint line between his brows was evident, bruise-like shadows rested beneath his eyes, and his jaw was tensed.

"Why are you up so early?"

"I didn't actually sleep."

I let that sink in for a moment. Something was seriously wrong with him.

I closed the distance between us and grabbed his slick arms, forcing him to stop. "What has gotten into you? I know Alice said you rearrange things a lot, but this seems extreme. Even for you."

He glanced around us as he observed the mess he'd made. A tic worked in his jaw, and I knew from his behavior at the ball that he was hiding something.

"You'd be a horrible professional poker player," I said with narrowed eyes.

He cocked his head to the side. "Excuse me? I happen to be an excellent poker player."

"If anyone ever figures out what I just did, you'd lose every time."

"What's that?"

"Every time you hide something, a muscle in your jaw ticks," I explained. "You just did it. So, now, tell me what it is."

"It's nothing to be concerned with," he said softly. "I merely need a distraction while you're away."

I stared up at him in confusion for a moment before I understood his meaning. Just like I needed to independently cope with the press' interest in me, he needed to keep his hands and mind occupied so that he didn't go insane with worry. I knew that all the times he "reorganized", was most likely during a time of stress for him. His family lived so far away, and he didn't have anyone he was really close to here in LA; it was to be expected that he'd find some way to deal with things alone.

I immediately backed off. "Okay. Just let me know where I can put my stuff when you're done." I smiled reassuringly at him.

"That's it?" he questioned incredulously.

"That's it," I confirmed.

"Huh." He resumed his work on the pile of clothes on the floor.

I turned to leave but was immediately stopped by Edward's arm spinning me around and pulling me against his sweaty body. I knew I should be disgusted to have my face buried in sweat, but he smelled so musky and good, I wasn't.

"Thank you for not giving me a hard time about this. You've no idea how much shit I hear from Alice," he whispered into my hair.

"Why would I? You didn't give me a hard time about my panic attack yesterday. We both deal with things in our own way." I paused for a beat. "But for future reference, let me know when you feel the desire to 'reorganize' everything again. I prefer to stay the fuck away. It's kind of weird seeing my usually composed fiancé all stressed out."

He laughed a little. "All right."

I left for school shortly after, cursing the SUV's and vans that followed me the entire way. The closer they got to my car, the more my hands shook. By the time I found a parking space, I was trembling violently in my seat.

_Just a little ways to campus ground_, I reminded myself.

I waited for Emmett to come over to the car before even attempting to get out in the mess surrounding me. Cameras were pointed at the windshield, silently snapping pictures through the glass of me sitting in my car and muffled shouts rang in my ears.

Panic welled in my chest again, but this time, I fought it with everything I had. I gritted my teeth and screamed out against it, before I finally closed my eyes and concentrated on picturing Edward's face in my mind. I focused on the way his shocking green eyes could hold me captive and entrance me and the way his corded muscles felt under my touch, along with the spark that contact with his skin caused to radiate through me. The seductive, smooth lilt of his voice echoed in my mind, and the overwhelming panic slowly ebbed to a dull ache in my chest.

I fumbled with my buzzing phone and stared down at the text Alice had sent me.

_Well done. Love you. Call me later. I need coffee now..._

I smiled in triumph.

Emmett snarled at the photographers as he pushed his way to my door. He opened the door and helped me out, shielding me from the crowd around us as we walked toward my first class. I could barely hear shouts of the other students over the incessant questions being hammered at me and finally couldn't take it anymore.

"How do you all expect me to understand a word you're saying if you're all talking at once?" I shouted with a small laugh that surprised me.

They all quieted down, but were still spouting off questions left and right. Regardless, it was better than before.

"Thank you," I said gratefully. "Can you all back up a little? I know you've got a zoom button on those fancy cameras of yours. No need to get so friggin' close."

No one moved.

"You heard the girl!" Emmett yelled. "Back the fuck up!"

His menacing expression had them complying immediately, and I had to stifle a laugh. If they only knew how sweet and goofy he was sometimes...

I finally had enough space to move away from Emmett and saw the t-shirt he was wearing. It was white and looked like it was handmade; it had "Team Bella" etched across his chest in messy, bright red block letters.

I groaned. "You are such an asshole, Emmett."

"You don't like it." It wasn't a question but a statement.

"Oh, look, it's Captain Obvious. Thanks for joining us again; we've missed you," I spit out sarcastically.

A few of the photographers laughed.

He grinned widely, exposing those dimples of his. "Anytime, BDB."

I shot him a warning glare. "Let's go."

As soon as we were safe from any of the photographers hearing anything we said, I whirled around on him. "I cannot believe you," I seethed. "I asked you not to do anything to embarrass me and on the second day of the job, you show up wearing..." I pointed at the stupid shirt. "That!"

Emmett picked me up and sat me in the doorway of the lecture hall. "Shut up and go to class. They don't make 'Team Bella' shirts and I'm sorry, but I don't fucking know your fiancé well enough to wear a 'Team Edward' shirt. Not to mention, that would look a little gay. So here's my support. Take it or leave it."

I blinked in shock. "Sorry," I mumbled quickly. "All this is going to take some adjustment." I looked at the shirt more carefully. "It's actually kind of cool. Thanks."

He nodded and grinned mischievously as he started to walk away. "You know, I could have put a giant purple dick on here..."

I blushed and went to take a seat before he could say anything else.

The day was awkward, to say the least. I had to try to ignore the obvious whispers between some of my classmates as they snuck glances at me and most likely wondered what it was that Edward wanted with me, while others were more direct, coming up and talking to me about my relationship with Edward like it was the most socially acceptable thing on the planet. Then there were the random shouts and "hellos" from strangers that saw me as I made my way to the next class. By the time my final class was over, I was ready to wear a wig and change my name to something generic like Nicole Smith.

"God, Ang," I griped, thankful for the reprieve from Emmett for a few minutes. "I just want to go home and crawl into bed and forget this ever happened. You're lucky that Ben's not stupidly popular yet. You'll probably never have to go through any of this. I'm so jealous."

"I'm sorry, Bella." She patted my arm soothingly.

I sighed. "It's not your fault. How're things with Ben, anyway?"

She beamed. "We're going out again this weekend. He's so great, Bella. Thanks so much for introducing us, even though I was pretty pissed at you at first."

I laughed. "It was actually Edward's idea. He thought that Ben could do better than Jessica Stanley. Obviously, he did."

She looked down at the floor and smiled again. "Thanks."

We passed a group of giggling girls. "Jesus, did you see how hot he is?" one of them asked the other.

"I know. She's so freakin' lucky. I'd die just from touching him. I can't imagine what it's like to kiss him."

"Or sleep with him," another giggled.

I watched them pass us by in bemusement. I opened my mouth to ask Angela if she had any idea what that was about, but shut it when I saw that with each step we took, the path grew thicker with random girls trying to sneak glances at something.

"No way." A giddy feeling coursed through me.

Angela looked at me curiously. "What?"

I weaseled my way through the gawking, giggling girls until my eyes landed on the welcomed sight of Edward waiting for me.

He was dressed in all black, leaning against the building with his arms crossed over his taut chest and one leg bent casually while he studiously ignored everyone around him. As soon as he spotted me, he pushed off the wall and grinned sheepishly.

My face split in two with my own smile, and I hurried over to him. "What are you doing here?" I squealed, leaping into his arms.

"You don't mind?"

"No!" His hold on me tightened. "You didn't answer my question."

"I needed to know you were all right. I've nearly driven myself mad today worrying about you," he admitted.

"I'm fine. See?" I pushed away from him and spun around. "Nothing to worry about."

"I see that." He reached for me and yanked me toward him so that he could kiss me. My cheeks flamed as he kissed me passionately, and I quickly broke away in embarrassment from the reaction it was eliciting out of some of the other students.

"We, uh..."

He rolled his eyes. "This ring on your finger signifies that you're mine. And as such, it is expected that we kiss occasionally. You must learn to get used to the fact that you, my love, fell in love with a celebrity and because of that, there will be times when we will be watched by everyone around us. Being together publicly doesn't need to change our relationship."

_Gah, this was so freakin' complicated._

"I'm sorry. I'll try harder." I beamed up at him. "I'm not panicking, though."

He grinned back. "And I'm extremely happy about that little fact. Shall I escort you to your car?" he asked, extending his arm to me.

I giggled and took it. "And then what?"

"I thought we could stop by the house so you could approve my... improvements to the bedroom, and then we could spend the evening at your flat. I'm assuming you'd like to spend some time with Rosalie?"

I shook my head with his unbelievable consideration; I was so damn spoiled. "What about Emmett?"

"Already taken care of. I rang him earlier and told him I'd be meeting you here this afternoon."

As soon as we stepped foot onto the parking lot, Edward's arm wrapped itself protectively around my waist while we were assaulted with photographers again. As soon as we got to my car, I finally noticed Edward had parked right next to me.

"See you it a bit?" he asked, opening my door for me.

"Okay."

He bent down and placed a chaste kiss on my temple. "Drive carefully."

"You, too," I whispered, feeling more affected by that simple kiss than I should have.

The photographers broke apart, some of them climbing in their vehicles and following Edward as he drove away, and some of them waiting for me. I started the car and put it in gear, glancing up in my rearview mirror and freezing in place in surprise, before I craned my neck around to see the image properly.

James Eliot stood in the distance, watching me with an unidentifiable look hidden behind his dark sunglasses. I started to brush it off, but something about the way his mouth twisted as he caught me staring at him gave me the creeps.

It was just one more complication to add to the growing pile of shit that was quickly gathering at my feet.


	23. Chapter 23

***waves* Hi, new people. There's about 200 of you since the last update which totally rocks my socks. Hope you enjoy the fic...**

**So... here's the deal with BtSatM. If you're not aware (Twitter ppl can skip this), chapter 30 is done. Stratan's just holding it hostage... Not his fault, though. Blame it on his asswad of a computer. But we're working on getting it out, I swear. **

**It's come to my attention that a lot of you don't know about the Twilighted forum thread. So here's the link again... http://www(dot)twilighted(dot)?f=44&t=7825 The fuckawesome gossip_bangkok started it (Miss you! You have a looong convo waiting for you about your trip when you get back!). I'm not on there everyday, but I do check it often and answer any question I can without giving anything away. And I'm trying to find someone to do a blinkie for those of you interested... apparently, a lot of you are.**

**Thanks for the reviews. I know I sometimes suck getting back to you, but I read them all.**

**Thanks to Stratan for beta'ing this, even on a shit-tastic version of Word and really, I hope the computer is finished tomorrow. For purely selfish reasons, you understand. ;)**

**Lemon at the end... and honestly, I was a little uncomfortable writing it because I've never written anything like that before. Hope it's okay. I liked it... had to go look for Mr. B when I was through, if that says anything.**

**There's a LOT in this chapter, so read carefully. It delves into a few issues going on for our Mougar Britward (couldn't resist, Claire) and Bella.**

* * *

Chapter 23

**Bella**

"Alice," I growled. "I have been all over this store looking for that jacket. Can't I just pick something else?"

"No!" she protested loudly, causing me to hold the phone out a little. "You want to make an impression at your meeting Friday, right?"

"I guess," I mumbled.

"Trust me. This is what I envisioned you wearing. You wore the light gray ruffled jacket with a long sleeved royal blue shirt underneath and a pair of white trousers. We found the trousers and the shirt; we merely need to find the jacket."

I groaned. "I can't believe you don't know what brand it is."

"It's not like I saw you getting dressed. I only saw you walking out of the conference room with a big smile on your face. Besides, it's not like I have every single designer's collection memorized. God, do you know how long something like that would take? And how pathetic that would make me?"

I laughed.

"I tried to look it up online, but I couldn't find it anywhere. You know how bloody ridiculous online shopping can be. They never have as large a selection."

"What about this one, love?" Edward asked, holding another gray jacket up for me.

"Let's see." I snapped a picture of Edward holding the jacket and sent it to Alice using the Blackberry. "Call me back and please tell me this is the one," I begged Alice.

"I'll do my best."

I hung up and collapsed on the cushioned bench behind me. "What have I gotten myself into?"

He chuckled. "Who knew there were so many things with ruffles at Barney's?"

"Your sister says they're in style, so of course everyone is designing their own."

"Of course." He flashed a lopsided smile and sat next to me. "Find anything else you wanted while we were on a jacket quest?"

I shrugged. "There were a couple shirts I liked, but I don't really need them."

"But do you want them? You do have all that space in the closet now."

"Yeah, about that..." I paused apprehensively. "I know I said I wouldn't give you any shit, and I'm not, I promise, I just-"

He laughed. "Bella, you're rambling."

"Oh." His finger swept over my jaw and down the column of my neck before dipping in between my breasts. My entire body reacted, smoldering beneath the surface. "Oh, you can't do shit like that here."

"Why not?" he asked with a puzzled expression.

"It uh, makes me want to uh... And you know, with cell phone cameras and whatever else you were telling me about, it's probably not the best idea."

His tongue ran over his teeth as he studied me. "I see," he said thickly, dropping his hand. "Better?"

"No," I whimpered.

He shook his head and chuckled. "What do you want then?"

"I don't know. I want it to be like it was before. Just you and me. None of the constant people following us and snapping pictures or asking for autographs. It's... distracting," I finally decided.

"Distracting? How so?"

"I can't focus on being myself with you with all this..." I waved my hands in the air, gesturing at the area around us where I got the unfortunate reminder that we were never really alone. People were snapping pictures and whispering to one another while Edward and I kept to ourselves.

"I'm so used to being Edward and Bella, and now I feel like I have to train myself to be something else in public. Someone worthy of Edward Masen's attention." I squeezed my eyes closed and shook my head. "I don't know."

I was trying so hard to push past the fear, panic, and uncertainty that came with having our relationship abruptly made public knowledge. I didn't have any preparation of any kind, and even though it had only been a few days, I felt so lost. The determination I'd had before was gone, and now it seemed that all I could do was worry and wonder about the future. It was infuriating. But I was learning to funnel all that anger toward the one person who ruined my blissful life because of her selfishness. Tanya.

"You_ are_ worthy of my attention. More than you know. And you don't need to change anything about yourself. You simply need to watch what you say in the presence of journalists and paparazzi because they'll take your words and turn them around to mean something completely different. And not in a flattering way, either."

"But that's the problem. I say whatever I want, whenever I want. How am I supposed to suddenly stop?" I bit my lip while I waited for his response.

He scrubbed his face in his hands before taking them and shoving his hair back. "My God, I've gone about this whole thing all wrong."

"That's my line."

He laughed once. "I should have started disassociating myself from Tanya on Thanksgiving instead of trying to use it as a shield. Because now you've been thrown into the life you fear the most. And while you're handling it exceptionally well, you're still scared, aren't you?"

I nodded.

"I so didn't want that for you." He inhaled sharply. "What's this shit you're supposedly not giving me?"

"Oh. Are you really okay? I mean, you seem fine, but honestly, the closet thing was a little weird."

"I'm all right," he said soothingly. "It's a coping mechanism, I suppose."

I nodded. "I figured. What were you worried about?"

He sighed. "Everything."

I waited for him to elaborate.

"From your safety to whether you'd panic again, and I'd find you curled up into yourself like I did Monday. Fear. Plain and simple and no more rational than your fears."

I stared at him in stunned silence. "Edward Masen is afraid?" I asked incredulously.

"Of Isabella Swan," he responded bleakly.

"But _why_?"

"I've never been so..." He stared at the display as he searched for the right word. "Consumed by someone before. I've never been so invested in a relationship. I've never really even been my total self with a woman in over twenty years. Not since that first film."

"I don't understand," I said slowly.

He leaned forward with an intensity in his eyes I'd never seen before. "Don't you see? You're the only one I've ever let see the real me, therefore, you're the only one who could ever truly hurt me. You could choose to leave me. You could be physically harmed or worse." He swallowed convulsively.

"Edward," I whispered. "Why is it bothering you so much now?"

"Because before it was speculation. Now, it's reality. I see all the possible ways this could go wrong for us, and it frightens me." He locked his serious gaze with mine. "Tell me how to get past the fear, baby. I don't know how."

This was almost too much to handle. My Edward; my smart, reasonable, sometimes extremely funny Edward was behaving like me, the inexperienced college student who didn't have anything in her life to serve as a base point for this relationship and guide her through the world of love and lust and everything that came between it.

It was sobering to be on the other end and feel the worry that went with wondering if that other person's fear would someday cause you pain, and I was suddenly so sorry for all the times I'd done it to him.

"You want to go through that display over there, don't you?" I inclined my head to the disarrayed shirts to our right.

"My fingers are itching to sort through the stock," he responded jokingly.

I giggled. "I don't have any good advice to tell you, because I'm still learning myself. I just keep pushing past it. I keep my feet firmly planted on the ground when I feel that urge to run and remind myself of everything I'd be missing out on if I left. But please remember, I love you. Even if you are half nuts."

"And I love you," he responded on a chuckle.

"I know." I glanced at my phone. "Think Alice is ever going to call back?"

He shrugged. "She might've gotten busy at work." He pointed to a black sweater on the mannequin. "Are you absolutely certain there's nothing you want? You'd look incredibly sexy wearing that."

I smiled indulgently. "You're not buying me anything, babe."

He pursed his lips slightly. "Spoilsport."

"Today, yes. I just want to go home," I whined.

"Then we will. I personally don't care what we do."

"Good, because I promised I'd hang out with Rose today. Her case goes in front of a judge tomorrow."

Edward raised his brows. "Oh? I hadn't realized it was so soon."

"Yeah. Apparently, since the judge wouldn't grant Royce bail, his lawyers managed to get an expedited hearing. If all goes as planned, Rosalie should leave the courthouse tomorrow a rich lady and Royce will be entering a rehab facility."

"With no criminal record at all."

"Not exactly. She'll have to drop the charges against Royce in order to get the job at King Pictures. But, she wasn't going to completely exonerate him. "

Edward grinned. "Such a fancy word."

I rolled my eyes. "She wanted to make sure if he went into treatment and still came out an angry drunk, he couldn't get away with hurting anyone like he had intended with her, so it's still on his record to show that he has a history of alcohol abuse and violence toward women."

He let out his breath slowly. "She was extremely fortunate."

"Fortunate my hero fiancé came to her rescue."

His face twisted with the memory. "I've already told you. It was _you_ I was worried about. Of course, I'd never want any harm to come to Rosalie either, but all I could think of was that I had to get to you and make sure you'd not been hurt."

We were silent for a moment. "I suppose I should thank Rosalie for settling this with him instead of dragging it to trial. Otherwise, you and I would be called as witnesses, and I'd have to explain further why I was there in the first place. Not really in our best interest at the moment."

"No, I guess not. Not with everything going on. I still want to go with her, though. For support." I bit my lip as I waited for his answer.

"Then go. You think I'd tell you that you had to come to work instead?" he asked with a smile.

"No. I thought you might tell me that it wasn't really a good idea with as much publicity as I'll be getting there."

He frowned thoughtfully. "Well, there is that. I suppose I could go with you."

"Why? Emmett will be there."

"Moral support. You don't want me there?" He looked a little disappointed.

"No, you being there with me would be great, actually. I just... Are you sure? I mean, you've managed to stay unassociated with this whole thing. We both have. This might change it all."

"She's the roommate of my fiancée. As soon as that little bit comes out it'll change it all anyway. What's the difference?"

My brows knit with his blasé attitude. "You never cease to amaze me."

He threw me a wide grin. "What did I do this time?"

"You're so comfortable in the spotlight. Having some other 'little' thing come out about us doesn't seem to bother you in the least," I explained.

"You can't hide from it, so why bother?" he questioned.

"You don't want privacy?"

"As an individual, no, not particularly. I've grown accustomed to this life of mine. As a fiancé, eventual husband and father, yes. I don't want you or any of our family members to suffer because of your involvement with me or simply because they have a blood relation to one of us."

"Hmm." I didn't know how to respond to that. It seemed we had differing point of views. I wanted to be as private as possible with him. I found that I'd enjoyed my time as a recluse with him much more than I could ever enjoy being with him in front of cameras and reporters.

"You have to remember that this life is all I know. I've never considered anything other than this career path for myself. You've shown me there's something different for me, something I find much more satisfying than being Edward Masen the actor. I'll do everything I can to make our life a good one, Bella. It's why I'm so willing to leave it all behind for you. Because we have something that makes me infinitely happier than filming, premieres, and the media."

And with those few words, my worries about the future and how I'd get through this were gone. "How do you do that?" I laughed.

He was baffled. "Do what?"

"Make me feel so much better with just a few words."

He smiled smugly. "It's a gift, Isabella."

"Whatever. Deflate the ego a little, please."

He laughed.

I grabbed my buzzing phone and answered it hopefully. "Am I done?"

"That's it. You need to try it all on to make sure it all fits properly, and then you're free to get shoes."

"Ah, damn. I thought you were going to say I was free to leave," I groused.

She laughed. "The shoes are the easy part. You need a pair of black caged sandals from Christian Louboutin. You can get them there."

_Christian Louboutin... Christian Louboutin..._

"Alice? Why do I have the feeling that they're extremely expensive?" I asked warily.

"Because they are."

"Shit, Alice, I can't afford all this! As it is, I'm spending over half of the money I got for my car!" I argued.

Edward snatched the clothes from my hand. "Try them on, and I'll buy them."

"Edward! I-"

He covered my mouth with his so of course I lost the ability to think. "No arguing this, love. You know as well as I do that I have more money than I know what to do with." He saw me getting ready to argue again and plowed ahead. "Think of this as part of your commission when I sign the contract. I'll take it out of that when I pay you."

"I need that money, Edward. For graduate school."

Something dark flashed in his eyes. "I thought we'd discussed graduate school. I thought it was agreed that if we were married, I would pay for you to go."

"I..." I really didn't have a good argument. I'd agreed at the time because I assumed that we wouldn't be getting married anytime soon. Now that he'd proposed and we'd agreed to elope, it changed everything.

"Bella, your commission is seven percent. Seven percent of thirty million dollars. Do the math."

I gasped and dropped the phone only for Edward to nimbly catch it before it shattered on the floor. "Holy fuck."

"Now, half that to allow for taxes, even though it won't be near that much. Do you have enough to pay for graduate school?"

I nodded numbly.

"Then stop being so difficult and buy the bloody clothes. You might as well get used to this sort of thing. You're expected to wear clothes that the average woman can't afford. And most of them, you won't pay for."

"I won't?"

He chuckled. "You really haven't the first clue about the film industry."

I bristled. "I learned a lot from Rosalie, thanks."

"The mechanics. She failed to mention that as a celebrity, you get so called 'perks'. Designers will start sending you free clothes to wear. You're a walking billboard now, love."

Alice's laughter rang out between us. Edward held the phone up to his ear with a grin. "Something amusing you, darlin'?"

His smile widened. "Not a row. I'd simply call this a minor disagreement that can be solved with a quick kiss and a change of the subject."

He brushed the hair off my quirked brow. "She says we're adorable and to stop being so ridiculous about my money." He listened to her chattering on the other end. "And to let me spoil you."

"I already do," I said with a laugh. "You think I'd let anyone else get away with all the things you do for me?"

He grinned wickedly. "I certainly hope not. Now, try these on so I can spoil you further in the privacy of your own flat." He put the clothes back in my hands and turned around to continue his conversation with Alice.

I sputtered at his back for a minute before finally going back into one of the fitting rooms. I locked myself in the room and stripped out of my clothes and changed into the clothes I was going to wear on Friday.

I fidgeted with the ruffles on the jacket and stared at myself in the mirror. It was... Well, fuck, I had to admit I looked good. Professional. Older.

And then I suddenly slumped against the wall with the realization that on Friday, I would be going in front of some of the most powerful men in Hollywood to iron out any kinks in the contract that they'd drafted for Edward.

I knew that the role was Edward's; nothing I did was going to screw it up. But it didn't help ease the nerves that rose in my throat and dampened my palms. I took a deep breath and tried to control the involuntary lurching of my stomach with the knowledge that Alice had seen me stepping out of that conference room with a smile on my face, so obviously I wasn't going to make a fool out of either Edward or myself.

I just needed to remember that.

A heavy shuffling of footsteps sounded just outside the door, too heavy to be the annoying sales girl checking on me.

I stood up and grinned. "You are so not getting laid in a fitting room at Barney's," I called out, yanking the door open.

I immediately took a step back in shock at the sight of James Eliot's face staring back at me instead of Edward's.

"Hello, Bella," he said with a nasty smirk. He raked his eyes over my body. "You really look good in this life you've made for yourself. Is there something in particular you need a three thousand dollar outfit for?"

I cleared my throat and willed my thundering heart to slow down. "How did you know how much this costs?"

He pointed to his eyes. "I've been watching you."

"W-Why?" I inwardly cursed my nervous stutter. The man was just creepy; it scared the hell out of me.

"Because I can," he said with a shrug. He took a step forward, causing me to take an involuntary step back again. "Is there something you're hiding?"

"No," I whispered.

He stepped forward again, boxing me into the corner. His hand came up, and I flinched away from the feel of his fingers brushing against my face as he tucked a lock of hair behind my ear.

"I don't believe you," he responded. He looked at me spitefully. "You want to know what I think?"

"Not really."

He narrowed his eyes and curled his lip back with my answer. "I think there's no way Edward Masen would just... fall in love with someone like you without some sort of ulterior motive. Maybe it's something as simple as you being a fucking tiger in the sack, but I have a hard time believing that out of all the women in the world who would gladly sell their soul to be in your shoes, he chose_ you_."

I blinked back the tears his words caused and met his deadened stare levelly. "Fuck you."

_Shit, now I'm in trouble._

He towered over me, seeming to grow larger even though his body never changed, and glowered down at me. "Say that again, bitch."

"Fuck you," I spat, unthinkingly.

He braced his lean body with his hands on each side of my face, caging me in. My body trembled, but I never cowered away from him. "What did you do?" He saw my engagement ring and yanked my hand up to his face. "What the fuck is this? You're engaged?"

I shrugged. "Maybe it's my grandmother's."

He let out this strange, almost sinister laugh. "What a bunch of bullshit. I'll expose you," he swore. "If it's the last thing I do."

"Try it," I dared. "You'll spend your entire life chasing after a story that doesn't exist." I could feel my spine stiffening in defiance. "What kind of journalist follows a girl into the fitting room anyway? Did you get a good show while you were supposedly chasing after your story, you fucking perv?"

He roared with anger and lifted his hand to smack me, creating enough space for me to dodge his blow and run back out to where Edward was waiting for me.

He saw me sprinting toward him and murmured something into the phone before he slipped it into his pocket. I jumped into his arms, trembling wildly, and clutched the back of his shirt with my hands while I gasped for air and tried to calm down.

"Bella!" he cried in alarm, sitting us down. "What happened?"

"James," I whispered. "James has been following me.

He jerked back and forced me to look at him. "He _what_?"

"I saw him at school Tuesday and he followed me into the fitting rooms. I- He-" I shook my head and tried to clear my muddled brain. "He thinks there's something behind our relationship. I've blackmailed you; I'm good in bed; a publicity stunt... I don't know." I shuddered with a sob. "Zafrina was right." People were never going to believe Edward and I were truly together.

He kept me cradled in his arms and pulled the phone back out of his pocket. "Who are you calling?"

"First, I'm calling the police. Second, I'm calling Zafrina. This will be everywhere in a matter of seconds."

That was enough to clear my mind. The reminder that Edward and I were in front of all these people had me sliding off his lap and straightening myself up. I still shook a little, and my heart was still hammering against my ribcage, but I wasn't about to look like an idiot on national TV later on tonight.

As soon as I was off Edward's lap, he shot up off the bench and strode toward the fitting rooms. I leaned forward and rested my elbows on my knees, staring at the floor and trying to keep the nagging self-doubt James' words had brought to the surface; all I could think about was the fact that I was in no way good enough for Edward. I'd always known it, but James' words had brought it all home.

Edward came back as he hung up the phone. "He's gone."

"Figures."

"_Why_ didn't you tell me he was there?" he asked in exasperation.

"When? Tuesday?"

He nodded tersely.

"I don't know. Everything's happening so fast, I forgot about it."

"We're filing a restraining order." My eyes widened. "I don't want him coming within a hundred mile radius of you, but since we live in the same fucking city, that's impossible, so I'm forced to be satisfied with a hundred feet." He seemed to burn with anger.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

"I told you James was relentless. The restraining order will keep him from making personal contact with you--because he values his career too much to jeopardize it--but I can't keep him from digging into your past." Edward took a hold of my hands. "I need to know; there's nothing that he could use against you, is there?"

"So you believe Zafrina now instead of me?" I snapped, snatching my hands back.

"No, love, not at all. I simply have to ask since I've never done so. As long as you're confident there's nothing for him to find, he'll eventually move on to something else."

"There's nothing," I said adamantly. "I'm a fucking poor student at USC with an immature mother and a father who lives in Washington. I've had a grand total of two boyfriends in twenty-one years. Uneventful, pathetic, and sad. That's my story."

"You forgot to mention you're going to be a sister come this May and that you're engaged to the most sought after man in Hollywood, if I'm being completely egotistical about it. Definitely not uneventful, pathetic, and sad by anyone's standards but your own."

I smiled and leaned against his arm. "What now?"

"Now, we get those shoes, file the appropriate paperwork, and go _home_. I'm through with being out today. What about you?"

I sighed. "I think that's an excellent idea."

* * *

**Edward**

Bella was quiet for the rest of our time at Barney's. I paid for the clothes and for a pair of Dior sunglasses that had caught my eye before I led her to the Christian Louboutin boutique, where she gave the saleswoman a short explanation of what she was looking for and her size.

She didn't even bother to try them on, just simply handed me the box and walked over toward a pair of black boots, idly picking them up and examining them as she waited for me.

"I'm a huge fan," the woman said as she scanned the box.

"Great." I was not in the mood for this. My main concern was Bella at the moment. "I'm glad you like my work."

"She's really lucky." She glanced over at Bella. "I wish my boyfriend would buy me a pair of eight-hundred dollar shoes."

"I plan to buy her whatever she wants for as long as she wants me," I answered honestly.

She seemed to melt with my words and took my credit card. I watched Bella as the computer processed the payment and printed out a slip. Something was horribly wrong with her. Her mouth was turned down in a frown, emphasizing the gloom that seemed to surround her. Her usual movements were hindered, almost as if she was afraid of being herself as the spectators watched on.

I signed my name quickly, forcing the lump that rose in my throat down. I shoved the slip in my wallet just as Bella walked back over to me and took the bag from the woman and turned away without a word.

My anxiety grew the closer we got to the door. In a matter of moments we'd be accosted by the numerous paparazzi waiting for us outside, and I was almost certain Bella would flee the scene--not that I could blame her. This was becoming even more than I'd bargained for.

I dug out the sunglasses and passed them to her. She took them from me with a funny look. "What are these for?"

"I thought they might help with the flashes. You mentioned they hurt your eyes."

She looked at them dumbly and then laughed, but it was thick with tension. "Why didn't I think of that?"

I shrugged and grinned crookedly at her as my arm snaked around her waist. I pulled her to me, shielding her from what was in essence my world. My fingers dug into her skin as I shifted my body so that she was hidden behind me. I kept my face down, ignoring the questions being hurled at us, while I focused on not lashing out at the people surrounding us. Resentment grew heavy in my chest, and I quickly found myself hating this part of my career because it was costing me the one thing I held most dear.

I opened the door for Bella and helped her slide into the Aston Martin before hurrying around to the driver's side without saying a word to the photographers around me. I'd be damned if I gave them anything today, not after what had happened with James.

I shut the door and started the car, stealing a glance at Bella sulking in her seat, and then slammed my fist against the wheel. I was lucky I managed not to deploy the airbags in my fit of rage.

"What the hell?" she shouted.

I pulled at my hair and threw my head back with the sudden, inexplicable urge to destroy something from the bitterness I was trying to keep such a firm hold before I did or said something to destroy my career instead.

"I'm losing you," I responded. "This... shit," I pointed to the photographers lining the sidewalk, "is going to be our demise."

"Edward, you're not losing me," she said softly.

"No?" I turned to her. "Then what has you so uncharacteristically quiet? Because I can think of no other explanation."

She opened her mouth and then snapped it closed again as she wrung her hands in her lap. "You're going to get pissed," she finally said.

I stared at her blankly. "What?"

"James said that he had a hard time believing that someone who could have any woman they wanted would choose me." A tear fell down her cheek, and she quickly brushed it away. "I can't help but wonder the same thing."

"No. God, Bella, no. Don't listen to him, please," I begged.

"Why not? It doesn't make sense to me. You know that."

She was right, I was angry with her for allowing what any of these idiots said to affect her.

I grabbed her face and pulled her to me, kissing her soundly. Her fists pushed against my chest, but I refused to let the fact that we were being watched serve as interference between us again; I'd had enough. She moaned at the forceful way my lips moved with hers and eventually gave in, wrapping her hands around my neck and dragging in a ragged breath of air before she kissed me back just as furiously. I reveled in the kiss for a moment before I pulled back, thankful that she was reciprocating my actions and no longer acting so bloody vacant.

"You are... You're so much more than what anyone on the outside can see because they don't know you," I snarled against her mouth. "You gave me a life, and if you don't stop second guessing how incredible you are, so help me, I will drill it into that thick skull of yours every day for as long as it takes for you to come to your senses."

She laughed and then sniffled. "I'm sorry. I know I'm getting on your nerves with this."

"You are," I admitted. "I know this is an adjustment, but you can't keep questioning yourself and our relationship simply because someone whose job is to question us does so. I'm trying to let you learn to deal with this on your own, but I can't let you wreck everything we have together. People gossip. These arseholes surrounding the car feed that gossip. Hell, tomorrow morning, there'll probably be headlines claiming that I held you hostage while the paparazzi looked on."

She giggled.

I arched a brow. "Are you all right now?"

She nodded. "That was scary," she admitted shakily. "He hates me, and I don't know why."

"He hates anyone who manages to do anything without his knowledge. He's a prick."

"He's creepy."

I drew in a quick breath with her words and all the vile things that it brought to mind. I stared at her, horrified, before it abruptly morphed to pure rage. I didn't know what James' motivations behind following Bella into the fitting rooms today were, but it didn't give me any sort of confidence for her safety, even with Emmett and I acting as her guards. The possibility that something could have happened to Bella while I was standing just a few feet away from her terrified me so greatly I had to focus on keeping my breathing steady and even so as to not give Bella any reason to be alarmed. If he'd tried to touch her in any way, I knew I wouldn't be able to be held accountable for my actions. As far as I was concerned, the moment he laid a finger on her, he was a dead man.

"He didn't try..." I gripped the headrest tightly, barely aware of its groan of protest, as I waited for her answer.

"No!" She shook her head. "He just gives me the creeps. Not in an 'I want to get in your pants' kind of way, but in an 'I'm a heartless bastard' kind of way."

I sagged against the seat in relief. "Oh, thank God," I breathed.

"He tried to slap me, though."

I froze at her words as anger rolled through me again. She'd misconstrued my question before, and even though the thought of him forcing himself on her was enough to make me nauseated, I had wanted to know if he'd tried to touch her at all.

The next time I saw him would most likely be followed by a mug shot and a night in county jail.

"Edward, are you okay?"

I shook my head like I was trying to dispel the violent thoughts from my brain. "No," I replied, swallowing thickly. "I can't... The thought... Jesus," I stammered.

I stared at her briefly and realized that there was no feasible way I could let her out of my sight without going stark-raving mad. If it wasn't James, it would be someone else. Bella was far too enticing for her own good.

And with that, I made a decision, one that Bella was sure to thoroughly dislike.

"We're moving."

"What?" she shrieked.

"I will not jeopardize your safety to live in LA. I know you've applied to graduate school at USC, but you have the grades and the ability to go anywhere you want. As soon as you've graduated, we're gone."

"Edward, come on! You can't be serious!"

I glared at her. "Does it look like I find this situation funny at all?"

She shook her head mutely.

"I could have lost you today! You could have slipped right between my fingers and God only knows what could have happened. Someone could have kidnapped you, raped you, murdered you." I clenched my eyes shut and stopped, unable to bear the potential of my words.

"Baby," she said gently. "You can't move us just because of something that _could've _happened. While I appreciate the need you have to protect me, you have to be realistic. Something like that can happen to anyone, anywhere."

"I understand that," I responded, "but you can't honestly tell me that you want to raise a family here in LA. There are hundreds of cities safer and better suited for children in the US alone. That doesn't include anywhere else in the world."

She regarded me with a curious expression. "You're serious about this."

Now that I'd calmed considerably, I pulled away from the curb and headed toward the police station I'd been given directions to. "Yes. James may be the catalyst, but you have to admit, it's a good idea."

"I don't know..." She chewed on her lower lip.

"Besides Emmett and Rosalie, what's keeping you here?"

"Nothing," she confessed. "Where would we move to?"

"Anywhere you'd like, love."

"Do you think I could get in to Oxford?"

"You want to move to England?" I asked in shock, flicking my eyes to hers before settling them on the road again.

"Well, I-" She broke off, blushing.

"Tell me," I encouraged.

"I love your family," she said weakly, "and it's the only place that comes to mind."

I laughed. "They love you. But really, Bella, that can't be your only reason for wanting to move to England. You've never even been there; how would you know if you'll like it? It rains and it's cold, absolutely nothing like here in southern California."

"We'd be near your parents. Our kids would be near grandparents who actually give a damn."

"Charlie would give a damn," I interrupted.

"Maybe," she said dismissively. "Anyway, Oxford has an English lit program I could go into. Or creative writing, but I don't think I really want to do that. I don't know," she mumbled. "I thought maybe you'd want to move back home. You kept your parent's place... It was stupid, forget it."

I was too bewildered to have this conversation while driving down the road, so I searched for a service station that would allow me to give Bella my full attention.

Home. I used to think of London as home even though I resided in LA, but now that I was sitting here and really thinking it over, home was decidedly where Bella was. I had the means to visit my family whenever I pleased, and once I retired, I'd have all the time I wanted to spend with them. It made no difference to me if we lived only a few hundred miles away in San Francisco or if we made our life somewhere obscure in the Midwest.

I parked and shifted so that I could reach out and touch her face. "You would move over five thousand miles from everything you've ever known for me? You would learn to drive on the other side of the road and convert miles into kilometers, say words like 'quid' and 'daft' and 'bollocks' all while picking up some strange accent in the process?"

"Well, when you put it that way..." She smiled teasingly.

"Isabella," I chastised.

"Okay, here's the thing. If we move, I want you to be happy. You have connections in London; the only place I have a connection to is Forks because of Charlie, and let's face it, I'm not nearly as close to him as you are to Carlisle and Esme.

"But I like LA. And I think you're being a little rash deciding we should move because of one stupid man."

"Does it seem like we've traded places here all of the sudden?"

She laughed. "Yeah, I guess."

I sighed. "Home is where you are. My family living in London has absolutely no influence on where I want to live. If that were the case, I'd want to live in Texas with Alice."

"You don't want to live near Alice?"

"Have you heard the way she speaks? No, thank you."

She grinned but held in her laughter. "So what do you want to do?"

"Put the conversation on hold, I suppose. As soon as you've experienced a few days in London, you can tell me if you still find it appealing. And then we'll go from there."

She nodded once. "Okay."

"Okay."

* * *

I gathered Bella in my arms and let my breath out slowly, grateful that the solace of her room relaxed me. She stared at me with a wide grin on her face, and I was helpless to stop the smile from crossing my face in response.

This was how we were meant to be. Alone, we were perfect. Happy. Outside the fragile little bubble we had inside the walls of her flat or my house, the stress and the reality of our situation seemed to come between us like a wall that couldn't be climbed.

I stifled a sigh with the thought that maybe we weren't strong enough to handle being together in the limelight. We really hadn't known each other long and had actually been in a relationship for an even shorter amount of time--six weeks.

And yet my entire world revolved around the tiny woman lying next to me.

Filling out the appropriate paperwork and informing the police about James' actions this afternoon had taken less time than I'd expected, but was no less tedious. I still couldn't figure out what he wanted with Bella, and I felt ridiculously inadequate as I struggled to answer questions about a man I knew almost nothing about.

My eyes shifted to the piece of paper sitting on her desk, and I mentally berated myself for being so dependent upon that small white sheet to give Bella the protection I felt she needed. While I was confident that James wouldn't blatantly come near Bella for fear of ruining his career, I wasn't sure that he'd stay away completely. He had an uncanny knack for discovering things about a person without that person ever knowing they were being followed or looked into in any way. Who was to say that being served with a paper filed with the LAPD would make him give up on his quest to expose the lie he was so strongly convinced of?

And I still couldn't shake the feeling that we needed to move--like yesterday. I could live anywhere and still work as an actor; all I had to do was get on a plane and fly to the location of the set. I couldn't escape the strange sense of foreboding that had settled in my chest. It conflicted with the feeling that came over me when Bella was lying in my arms like this and managed to be accompanied by the anxiety and fear I'd felt all afternoon. I instinctively knew that the problem with the paparazzi chasing us everywhere we went wasn't going to resolve itself anytime soon, and I wondered what that meant for us exactly in the future.

Bella's fingers trailing over the stubble of my jaw brought me back to her. "You look so sad," she whispered.

"Just thinking," I answered vaguely.

"Of?"

I didn't want her to worry, so I brought her hands to my lips and kissed her fingers. "I love your room."

She laughed once. "Okay, why's that?"

"It smells like you; it feels like you. I can't explain it, really. I simply hope when you finally move in with me that you bring whatever it is I love so much with you."

"It's not very nice," she said as her eyes wandered around the space.

I followed her gaze and focused on the pale gray color of her walls and the deep, dark purple of her bedding. The hardwood floor was scuffed and in desperate need of repair and there were flaws in the plaster and cracks in the ceiling. But none of that mattered. Bella had made this room hers in every possible way, from the pictures scattered on a corkboard on the wall and the books and papers stacked in every free space to the random littering of clothes that she'd thrown over the footboard or on the floor while getting ready in the morning.

"It's yours," I told her with a shrug. "But I must ask about the purple. I've only seen you in purple once since I met you; you don't really seem like the purple type."

"Charlie bought it. It was on sale. He thought it was a good housewarming gift, but what we really needed were dishes." She took the corner of the comforter and ran her fingers over it. "Got to love him for trying, though. He did more than Reneé."

"How so?"

"She gave me a hug and told me to make sure I locked the doors at all times."

"I hate your mother," I said venomously. "I hate that you lived your entire childhood and never really knew what it's like to feel the love and safety that only your parents can give you. I hate that she took you from Charlie and then did nothing to help you prepare for adulthood. I hate that she's selfish and undependable and that she's about to have another baby, because he could be completely screwed up by her lack of parenting skills. And that except for that phone call Tuesday morning, she's really made no effort to reconcile with you."

"She probably got distracted."

"Bella, come on," I scoffed.

"I'm not making excuses for her. I'm telling you the truth. She probably got distracted and will pop up when we least expect her to. But if it makes you feel any better, I think you might hate her about as much as I do at the moment."

"I'm fairly certain you're correct."

"I don't want to talk about my mom," she said grumpily.

"Then let's talk about something else. Or not talk at all."

She took her hands from mine and settled against me. "I like the not talking part."

"So do I. Want to try something different?" I asked with a playful look.

"Like what?"

"I'm assuming that even though Emmett is a complete ass about your... toy, you've not thrown it away?"

"I've hardly been home, so no." She narrowed her eyes slightly. "What do you want it for?"

Desire stirred inside me as I skimmed my hand over her hip, thinking about how amazingly beautiful she'd look writhing before me and an unconscious groan fell from my lips. "I want to see you make yourself come so that way, when we're apart, I'll have the visual to accompany the sounds you make in my ear."

Her breath came out shakily as she stared back at me. "I... You're serious? No more joking about it?"

I shook my head in answer.

"I guess. I mean, I've never done anything like that before so I don't know..." Blood pooled in her cheeks.

"Are you uncomfortable with this? We don't have to do anything you don't want," I said soothingly.

"No, not uncomfortable. Just nervous I guess."

"It's just me," I told her, leaning toward her and kissing her softly.

I kept my movements languid as I undressed her, making sure every touch silently communicated how utterly safe she was with me and how devoted I was to her. Soon her stunning body was exposed to me, and I surrendered myself to her as she repeated the same motions, silently undressing me and watching me closely with an unfathomable expression that was a mixture of adoration, desire, fear, and nervousness.

I stared into her dark, hooded eyes, realizing that after everything we'd been through today, I needed her to trust me. I needed to wash away her fears with the connection of our bodies and feel the heavy feeling of emotion that came over me when we came together. I wanted to make sure she knew that she never had anything to be nervous about so long as I was alive and breathing; I would never let any harm come to her.

I laid her down and reached into the table, pulling the vibrator out and laying it on bed beside us. My fingers trailed over her, and her hips bucked into my hand while her body shook simultaneously.

"You don't have to," I whispered.

Her hand shot out to the back of my neck, and she brought me down on her forcefully. "Do it for me, Edward." She bit her lip and searched my face.

I groaned with the prospect of being the one to make her come like that. I couldn't explain why it made me ache so, but the longing to watch it was so severe, I had to fight the urge to come before we'd even started.

I kissed her once. "Guide me."

I dipped my head down and trailed kisses over her jaw and up to her ear. I nipped at her earlobe as her hips rocked against mine, and her breathing grew shallow. I moved down her body, slowly making my way over every inch of her sweet skin with my tongue while my hands caressed her breasts. She was flushed with excitement and responded to each touch with a soft moan or a sigh.

I moved my hand between her thighs and lightly ran my fingers over her until I finally pushed one inside and felt how ready she was. Her eyes fluttered closed, and she practically growled at me when I stopped to grab the vibrator.

My chuckled died in my throat as soon as her hand closed around mine on the vibrator and switched it on. I couldn't tear my eyes away from our hands as she led it to her body. In one smooth movement, she'd slipped it inside her, arching away from the bed and drawing it in deeper.

"Fuck, Edward," she groaned, dropping her hand and allowing me to move it however I wished.

I pulled it back and watched as I plunged it back inside her before finally snapping my eyes to hers in an attempt to wield my control; the sight of her hips pushing into my movements was almost too much to bear, and every muscle in my body was tense with my need for her.

I used my other hand to stroke her, but never dropped my eyes from her face. She met my gaze and blushed, and I muttered an expletive as my control grew thinner.

Thankfully, her body chose that moment to explode with her orgasm, and she screamed out against it while she gripped the pillow above her head.

Blood roared in my ears, and I threw the vibrator across the room just before I drove into her and lifted her hips up for more leverage. She panted against me and tried to twist free, but I kept a firm grip of her and continued to plunge inside her, desperate to sate the ache that ripped through me.

I wanted to say something, but all I managed to get out was, "Isabella," through gritted teeth.

She wrapped her delicate legs around my waist and began to twitch under me again. I could sense how close she was and thrust into her recklessly, anxiously waiting to dive off the cliff with her when she came.

I shuddered as I climaxed with her and immediately pulled out so that I could lie on top of her without crushing her, because I didn't have the strength to hold myself up at the moment.

I laid my head down on her stomach and waited for my pulse to stop drumming in my ears. Her hands wound themselves in my hair and she giggled softly.

"That was..." she said breathlessly.

I turned my head and kissed just below her belly button. "Mmm," I agreed.

She lightly played with my hair, causing my eyes to close against my will. "Stay?"

"I'll have to leave in the morning to dress for court," I replied.

"So?"

I laughed silently. "I'm only letting you know."

"Oh, okay. So you're staying?"

I wanted to laugh again but didn't have the energy. "Yes, love."


	24. Chapter 24

**Thanks for the reviews and recent adds and thanks to Stratan for catching my mistakes :)**

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* * *

Chapter 24

**Edward**

I woke up in Bella's bed with a much clearer mind, and I could see how absurdly I'd behaved yesterday afternoon. I'd stopped trusting my instincts and instead, let my fear of something happening to Bella direct my actions. She was right; there was no way to guarantee her safety no matter what proactive measures I took. Bodyguards, moves, and restraining orders would help, but no matter where we lived or what we did, there was always a risk unless we locked ourselves inside and cowered from the world.

Which was not happening.

Bella relied on me to be her strength, using my experience and my generally steady personality to help her through these first few weeks of incessant photographers and reporters trying to figure us out. Worry, fear, anxiety, and rash decisions would eventually end her confidence in me to get us through this, and I couldn't let my emotions overwhelm me and wreck everything I had with Bella. I may have constantly wondered if her own insecurities would be our ruin, but I was guilty now of the very same thing. And I couldn't let that happen because this woman--the woman lying next to me with her hair tangled in snarls and her beautiful face puffy with sleep--was who I was made for. No one else would ever come close to making me feel the way she could with just a simple smile.

We were the hot story at the moment, and until some other celebrity found themselves in jail or did something enormously scandalous, we'd have no kind of relief or privacy when we were on public ground. I could easily disregard everything they printed or said about us, but I wondered if Bella could do the same. She needed to let it roll off her shoulders so that she could find peace in the life we were creating for ourselves.

I knew ways to get around the photographers and was now going to heavily rely on them when Bella and I went out together, rather than trying to be your average citizen in LA. It just wasn't possible at the moment. Even though I wasn't going to allow myself to become consumed by it, Bella's safety was still my priority.

Which made stopping James first on my list of "to do's" today. An idea had occurred to me late last night and today, I planned to follow through and find every piece of information I could about James Eliot and whether there were any triggers or psychiatric issues of any kind that would lead to his obsession with Bella. The word "stalker" had not been said, but his interest in my fiancée was unhealthy, at best.

I wondered how long he'd been following her. Before Royce's tirade? Or after?

"So..." Bella looked at me sleepily as I brushed her chaotic hair from her face. "I might've overreacted a little yesterday."

She giggled. "Uh, yeah. You think?"

"I'm sorry. It scared the absolute hell out of me," I admitted sheepishly.

"Ha, now you know how it feels." She paused. "So does this mean the move's off?"

"No, but we never actually agreed to move to England, love."

"Well, no, but I thought it was actually a pretty good idea." She traced my eyebrow with her index finger. "But if you don't want to..."

"It's not that I don't want to," I said honestly. "I like my life here; it led me to you, but then again, I think it's wise for us to get as far away from Hollywood as possible. We can't have the life we want here."

"I totally agree. I really like being away from all the cameras. Even though it was a pain in the ass, keeping our relationship a secret was actually a lot better than being 'out'. Don't you think?"

"Yes." Most definitely. The uncertainty I felt nagging at me had never been an issue before. I was sure of Bella's feelings for me and of the strength of our relationship as well as her safety. Now, as much as I hated admitting to it, I was certain of nothing.

I pulled her against me and kissed her forehead. "And when I said 'We're moving' yesterday, I hadn't meant right this second."

"Yeah, I know. I guess we were both just feeling the effects of James' weirdness. You said the word 'move', and I jumped on it because I was so fucking freaked out."

I nodded. "Nothing needs to be finalized now. We have until May to figure out where we want to move to. England being your first choice is fantastic, but there are other places we might be just as happy living in as well. I think we should base our decision on which universities you'd like to attend."

"Really?"

"Really. Apply to Oxford, Harvard, Yale, Brown--anywhere you can think of--and we'll go from there."

"You're leaving this to me?" she asked excitedly.

"I told you yesterday; home is where you are," I chuckled.

Her face lit up. "You think I could get into those schools?"

"Why would you not? You're an extremely smart person."

"I never considered it. I didn't have the money to."

"Now you do. Well, as of later this afternoon you will since you're so determined not to use _my _money," I amended and glanced at her alarm clock. "We should get moving."

She shook her head and started placing kisses over my torso. The feel of her tongue on my skin went straight through me, and I had to force myself to push her away from me.

"Isabella," I warned roughly. "I'll be late. I have a few things that I need to do before I meet you at the courthouse."

She smiled up at me and batted her eyelashes flirtatiously. "No, you won't."

I returned the smile. No matter how hard I tried, I'd never be able to understand how she could go from serious to playful in the blink of an eye.

She moved down my body, and I groaned as visions of her wrapping her mouth around me flitted through my mind. I needed to get up before my pecker overthrew my brain.

I broke away from her and slid out of bed, gathering my clothes and putting them on before I turned to face her.

She was pouting. "You don't want me to?"

I glanced down to where my body was still hard for her. "Does it look like I don't want you to?"

"No. It looks... uncomfortable." She smirked.

She had no idea.

I leaned forward and kissed her once. "We must get ready, love. If I'm late, I won't be allowed inside the courtroom."

"Fine," she grumbled. "Be all reasonable and shit."

"I thought that was what you loved about me," I responded lightly.

"Not at the moment."

"I do have time to eat something with you before I go. If you want," I told her, changing the subject.

"Okay. Let me check on Rose first."

Bella got dressed quickly, and I then followed her through the corridor until she stopped at Rosalie's room. I slapped her arse as I walked past her, loving the loud sound that reverberated against the walls.

"Hey!" she screeched, jumping with surprise.

"Couldn't resist." I smiled cheekily and continued toward the kitchen.

"Was that a Bella ass pop I heard?" Emmett asked as I walked into the room.

"It was."

He snickered.

I rummaged through the cupboards and refrigerator, finding nothing suitable to fix for breakfast other than sugary cereal and expired milk. I turned and faced Emmett and ran my hand through my hair before speaking.

"What are we supposed to eat if neither of our women have gone to the store lately?"

"BEC's, dude."

"What's a BEC?" I questioned.

"Bacon, egg, and cheese." He stared at me like I was some sort of strange, mythological creature he'd just caught sight of.

I made a face with the thought of eating all that greasy food from McDonald's. "That's disgusting."

"It's fucking awesome," he argued. "Don't you like McYuck's?"

"No. That's quite an apt description of it, though, Emmett."

He shrugged. "Suit yourself. There might be something in the freezer if you're lucky."

I opened the freezer to find ice cream, ice, and something I couldn't identify. Sighing, I pulled out my mobile and dialed the bakery Bella had mentioned she loved so many times and ordered for delivery.

"You get any of those tabloids lately?" Emmett asked, not looking up from the magazine in front of him.

"Zafrina usually has them delivered to my house, but I've not had a chance to look at them. Why?"

"Bella's face is on every single one Rosalie got in the mail last night."

Fuck.

"Let me see those." I hastily pulled them out of Emmett's hands and started rifling through them.

Pictures of Bella at USC, walking down the sidewalk, and into her apartment as well as pictures of the two of us together were splashed on every cover along with Tanya's face and captions like "Edward Masen's Secret Affair. Our exclusive with heartbroken Tanya Denali." and things that scandalized our relationship and Bella's age. There was even an article that claimed an exclusive interview with some random bloke at USC and stated that Bella frequently participated in threesomes and that was how we'd eventually met, because I obviously liked them young and felt it necessary to troll for girls on campus.

If I wasn't so worried about Bella's reaction, I might've laughed at the last bit. Bella was the first significantly younger girl I'd ever dated, yet this person writing the article implied that it was almost compulsive for me.

It wasn't like being on the cover was unexpected, but somehow actually holding proof that people were going to take advantage of Bella and me for their own gain made it so much worse.

Bella's laughter filtered throughout the flat, and I quickly shoved the magazines toward Emmett in panic.

"Hide them," I hissed.

"What the fuck?" He laughed. "No way. Bella's face is going to be priceless when she sees these."

My expression turned hostile. "Her bursting into tears is not funny at all."

"She won't cry. Chill."

"She won't cry if she sees only one. But all these..." I waved the magazine with the ridiculous article in the air wildly before throwing it back at him. "Just hide them," I demanded.

He simply sat there and grinned.

"Would you like to get paid for your services so far?"

He opened his mouth once before he raked the magazines into a basket and shoved his jacket on top of it. "There. Satisfied?"

"Marginally."

"You're ate up. It's not like she doesn't know this shit's coming."

"I know, I know." My heart was slammed in my throat. "I can't let her go, and this might finally break her."

He leaned forward and eyed me for a moment. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you have some serious issues spurred on by fear."

I blinked, surprised that words like that had actually come out of Emmett's mouth.

"I'm not stupid. I just like to have fun and joke around."

"All right. Though, I never actually said you were stupid."

"Your face said it all." He sat back and wove his fingers together on the counter. "Come to Dr. Emmett."

He flashed a toothy grin.

I chuckled at the ridiculousness of the situation and then told him everything. Once I'd started, I couldn't seem to stop. It was like the dam had broken, and I was steadily flooding the valley below with my word vomit.

"What do you think?"

"I think you need to stop being such a damn freak, Masen. She loves you. You love her. Yes, the situation is not ideal, but get a fucking grip and adjust. You both are putting _way _too much into this. You're going to push her away with all this questioning and worry. Then what?"

God, he was right. I was doing it again; worrying over everything, wanting to make sure Bella wasn't keeping anything from me and that she was happy, and my doing so was going to have the opposite effect if I didn't rein in my emotions soon. She was going to leave if I didn't stop doubting her commitment to me.

I groaned and reached for the magazines. "Set them out. I'm sure her reaction won't be as awful as I fear it will."

Emmett complied with a smile. "There ya go."

"Thanks," I muttered dryly.

I picked up the magazine and finally read the article thoroughly. Words and phrases like drugs, sex in public, and threesomes were thrown around carelessly, and while they never actually _said_ Bella partook in any of these things, the suggestion was there. Never in my career had anything this ludicrous come out about myself or anyone I was involved with until now. It was... enraging that anyone could ever say anything bad about Bella. She was beautiful, smart, witty, friendly, kind, and innocently endearing. I'd never met a person who could make you like her as effortlessly as she could.

I grasped onto the counter as anger ripped through me. For Bella's reputation to be damaged so severely, simply because she loved me, was too much for me to handle. I wanted retribution. The desire within me to protect Bella was unleashed, and no one was safe from my fury.

Emmett whistled to get my attention. "Edward, you're hyperventilating."

I realized my breathing had started coming in rapid, sharp gasps, and I worked to steady them and control my anger before Bella could see me.

"Thanks," I muttered.

"No problem. You okay?"

I nodded once.

Bella poked her head into the kitchen. "Where's my food?" she joked.

I let a thin smile cross my lips, hoping it would disguise the turmoil inside me. "Which would you prefer? Cereal with expired milk or something I couldn't begin to name in the freezer?"

Her brow furrowed. "Oh, shit. It was my turn to go to the store, and I kind of forgot with everything going on. I'll-"

"It's already taken care of," I interjected. "It should be here in another fifteen minutes."

She smiled gratefully. "I'll just go take a quick shower then."

I waited until I heard Bella turn the water on before I rang Zafrina. As I waited for her to answer, I glanced up at Emmett.

"I need to speak with you," I murmured. "While Bella's still in the shower."

"Okay," he responded slowly.

Zafrina answered, and I didn't even bother with pleasantries. "Z, leak the fucking contract."

"What?"

"You heard me, but I'll repeat it again," I said angrily. "Leak the fucking contract."

"Edward, you've not even done the interview yet!"

"I don't care!" I roared. "I will _not_ let anyone talk about Bella the way they are. Have you seen what's in this week's issues?"

She cleared her throat. "I did."

"How could you let something like that be published? Do you have any idea what this will do to her?"

"Like she didn't know what she was signing up for when she started dating you."

"Excuse me?" I asked incredulously.

"She had to know that this could happen."

"Your job is to make sure that something like this is never so much _thought _much less printed about me or any of my family. This includes Bella. Fix it."

"Edward, if you'll just think about this, we can use this to our advantage. You can-"

"Fix it! Now! Or I'll find someone who will."

"What do you want me to do? I'll leak the papers, but that does nothing to change what's already been said."

"I'll call Jenks and have him threaten suit. Make them retract the story. And I want the name of that anonymous source."

"You know I can't get that."

"Yes, you can," I protested. "I've seen you do it before."

"She's that important?" she sighed.

"What kind of question is that?" I was yelling again. "She's my _fiancée_! I know you have your differences, but Jesus, Zafrina, put the shit aside and do your bloody job. Call me when you've taken care of this disaster."

I ended the call and rang Alice.

"Al?" I asked when she answered. "I need a favor."

"Which is?"

"I need the name of that private investigator friend of Jasper's."

Emmett's eyebrows shot up.

"Why?" she asked indignantly. "You need to look into Bella's background? I can already tell you there's nothing there. And if you're doing anything behind Bella's back that will hurt her, so help me Edward, I will fly to LA and put your balls in a vice, brother or not."

"There's no need to put my balls in anything uncomfortable, thank you. We have an issue here with someone who might be a stalker of sorts, and I want information about him."

"Oh. Oh, Edward, I didn't see anything. I'm so sorry. Is everything okay?" she asked worriedly.

"It's fine. We're fine," I soothed. "The name, Alice?"

"Right. Sorry. Sam Uley. He's listed."

"Brilliant," I said sarcastically.

"Edward?" she asked tentatively. "Have you seen next week's headlines?"

"Unfortunately."

"You're all right?"

"No. I can't talk about it right now. I'll call you later, though. Thanks for the name."

I hung up before she could pry any further and looked back to Emmett so that I could explain everything that had happened in the last twenty-four hours and give him a name and description of who to look for when guarding Bella.

After I was finished, I noted his demeanor had changed entirely. His blue eyes were intense; his posture was rigid. "I'm not going to let that prick come anywhere near her, Edward. I swear."

And I believed him. "I know."

The doorbell rang, so I went to answer it and pay for the food. The delivery boy sputtered the entire time, and I couldn't help but chuckle as his shaky hand came up to take the cash from mine. I told him "Thanks" and shut the door, turning to see Bella standing behind me in a dark blue robe that made her skin look wonderful.

She combed her hand through her wet hair and squealed at the pink box in my hand. "Oh, my God! I love you so much!"

I laughed. "Well, if that's the reaction I get from buying you a box of pastries, I'll do it more often."

"Did you get the croissants?" She opened the box and peered inside. "Oh, thank God!"

She pulled one out and moaned as soon as she took a bite.

"Good?" I asked, smirking.

She nodded. "They've got this honey glaze on them, and I swear they melt in your mouth. Try it."

She held the croissant out to me. I smiled at her when I tasted it. "Very good."

"Fuck, yeah." She reached inside the box and got another one before heading to the kitchen.

She stopped abruptly and stared at the magazines on the counter. I held my breath as I waited for her reaction.

She picked up the magazine with the damning article, flipping to its page, and let out a small squeak of distress before she let it fall to the floor. She glanced down at the croissants in her hand with a revolted expression and slowly put them on the counter.

Her eyes lifted to mine, and a tear fell down her cheek.

I was by her side in a flash, throwing the box at Rosalie, and gathering Bella up in my arms.

"They... I... We..." She swallowed hard. "Someone said we met when we had a threesome?" Her voice cracked and her pained expression tore at me. "Who?"

"I told Zafrina to find out," I whispered.

She nodded and pushed at my chest, trying to get me to release her. I dropped my arms and watched her anxiously. She looked quite pale.

"I think I'm going to be sick." She bent forward and put her hands on her knees. "Yeah. Definitely going to be sick."

She spun around and sprinted down the hall. I glanced at Rosalie when I heard the door to the loo shut, followed by the sound of Bella's heaving.

"Shit," Rosalie breathed. Anger seemed to roll off her in waves. "Some asshole said Bella has threesomes? She's probably one of the most innocent students at USC!"

She reached out for the magazine. "What did that article say?"

"You don't need to know, babe," Emmett replied coolly as he stood up with the magazine in his hands.

"The fuck I don't! Give it to me!" She snatched the magazine from him. I left her to scan the article while I checked on Bella; I couldn't think of everything inside it anymore.

I knocked on the door hesitantly. "Love?"

Water ran before she finally opened the door with her toothbrush in her mouth. "I lost my appetite. Sorry," she mumbled around the toothbrush.

"What are you sorry for? You did nothing wrong!"

"You remembered the bakery I liked and got me all my favorites, and now I can't enjoy it."

"Bella, I don't care about that. I care about you."

She held up her finger and rinsed out her mouth before coming back to me and wrapped her arms around my waist as her entire body sagged against mine. "The whole world thinks I'm a slut," she cried. "Why would someone do that?"

"Money." I held her against me tightly. "Jealousy. I can think of numerous reasons why."

She drew in a shuddering breath. "Think Rosalie would be pissed if I stayed home?"

"You're hiding?"

She simply shrugged.

I gripped her shoulders firmly and held her away from me so that I could see her. "No," I said forcefully. "You're much too good to hide from these bastards."

"Edward." She stared up at me with sad, glimmering eyes. "What's the point?"

"NO!" I shouted, startling her. "Where is that backbone of yours I love so much? Fight back, baby. Please. Don't let them get away with saying those things about you. I'm not."

"But we don't know who it was."

"Zafrina will find out."

A bleak laugh bubbled from her chest. "You trust her to actually find the name out for you? She was the one who didn't bother stopping the article from being printed in the first place. Some fucking publicist she ended up being," she snarled.

"I gave her a good tongue lashing. She knows she made a mistake." Why, however, I didn't understand. It wasn't like Zafrina to overlook anything, much less something that harmful.

Bella snorted, making my lips twitch with my smile. "A tongue lashing? Dear Lord, are you from eighteen-twenty? It's called telling someone off, Edward."

I grinned, appreciating her snarky facade, but her eyes gave her away; she was still incredibly hurt. I desperately wanted to make her feel better, but wasn't entirely sure how other than taking the enormous pressure of the paparazzi following her every move away.

"When she finds out who the source was, we can sue," I responded confidently. "That's one of the stops I need to make this afternoon. I plan to discuss the matter with my lawyer."

"You've never sued anyone before."

"There's a first time for everything. I've already instructed Zafrina to leak the contract. Tanya's little publicity stunt is over as far as I'm concerned. I promise she and I will make it like it never happened. I will not let anyone get away with hurting you, Bella. I'm just sorry I didn't do it to begin with. I could have saved you a lot of tears this morning if I hadn't been so eager to follow Zafrina's plans."

"There you go, being the hero again."

"What would you have me do?" I asked softly. "I love you; it makes me your greatest defender."

She pressed her lips to mine. "Thanks, babe."

* * *

**Bella**

I managed to keep my emotions bottled up while Edward was at my apartment. I could feel the hurt and anger clawing their way to the surface--begging to be released--but used Edward's presence as a distraction. I focused on the way his hands constantly touched some part of my body in comfort instead of the few words in the article my mind had managed to comprehend before the wall came up and blocked the rest from my consciousness.

I listened to Emmett's comments and typical goofiness instead of the niggling voice inside my head that reminded me how horrible I was for Edward, and I vowed not to let her win. Because if there was anything I knew, it was that Edward loved_ me_--with all my faults--and not someone regal and stunning and outwardly perfect like Tanya Denali or Zafrina Torres.

I paid close attention to the plans Edward made with Emmett about today's travel arrangements. I was to trade places with Rosalie today until the trial, driving her car to my meeting and wear a blond wig I had shoved in the back of my closet from a few Halloweens ago to keep the press from following me around.

Edward lingered a little longer than I was sure he'd planned, making sure I was all right, before he finally left with a promise to be waiting for me at the courthouse steps, and that steely exterior I'd managed to keep hold of finally melted in the heat of the anger, betrayal, and pain that swelled inside me.

After he left, I retreated to my room to get ready. I put on the clothes he'd bought me at Barney's yesterday and slipped the shoes on before sitting at the vanity. I tried to put on makeup, but every time I lifted the black pencil liner or the mascara wand, another tear would slide down my cheek and I was forced to fix the trail of gray it had left in its wake before attempting it again. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't seem to regain my composure, so I simply stared at myself in the mirror.

Eventually, the image became distorted to the point that I was unrecognizable. The face staring back at me was not that of the girl I knew, but that of a stranger. Flaw after flaw stood out; an eyebrow slightly higher than the other, the faint crooked line of a nose, a top lip too thin to match the bottom. The woman looked so worn down, defeated, and sad. The spark of life that was always evident in her dark eyes was gone.

I wanted to crawl under a rock and disappear for a few weeks. Maybe then the interest in Edward and me would die down.

But I knew realistically I couldn't do that. Not only would I be disappointing Edward, but I'd be disappointing myself. I'd always prided myself on my ability to speak my mind. There were plenty of times visiting Charlie in Forks when he'd make the light comment about his daughter growing up to be a lawyer, because she could argue with the best of them. While I never dreamed of actually standing in front of a jury or a crowd of any kind to give speeches or opening statements, his unspoken delight in me had always been able to carry me through the months afterward when I had no one but myself to rely on.

But I knew he'd never understand now. I was left to figure this out on my own.

Yes, I had Edward, but he was so... involved with me, that he couldn't really give me any impartial advice. His instinctual reaction was to stand up for me, which wassomething that actually warmed my heart. I'd never had someone so protective of me before, not even Charlie. Charlie had always trusted in my decisions and let me live my life the way I felt best without interfering at all. Even on Thanksgiving when he caught Edward and me making out in the rain, he'd only shown his disapproval with a short grunt and a look. He gave Edward a chance to prove himself because of that trust.

I couldn't burden Rosalie with this, not with her civil case going in front of a judge in a matter of mere hours. Angela wouldn't understand the need I had for privacy while dating such a famous man. She'd try to sympathize, but because Ben wasn't insanely popular like Edward, she couldn't really identify with what I was going through. Hell, I didn't even get it.

I felt torn in two. One part of me ached for Edward and his soothing voice and touch. For the man who ignited fire in me with a look and understood me in a way no one else ever would. The man who I'd changed my entire future for to make his dreams a reality. But the other part of me longed for the life I had before. The carefree girl whose only concern was of school and had the innate ability to float through life on the outside was gone. I may have fallen in love with being an active participant in my life now, but I missed the numbness that I once knew. Because being the outsider meant you never really got hurt.

And right now, I was hurt more by strangers than I knew was possible. I'd never known that the term "heartbreak" was an actual, physical response your body had to your emotions. My chest was heavy, and the spot my heart beat continuously in my chest ached. It was so much worse than that congested feeling I'd felt while Edward was in Vancouver--something that actually scared me a little. If a person I didn't even know could hurt me like this, what could Edward do? And could I live through that kind of pain?

I was pretty sure the answer was a resounding "no".

A knock on the door broke my stare. "Yeah?" I croaked, clearing my throat.

Rosalie tentatively looked inside the room. "You okay, sweetie?"

I nodded.

"Someone's here to see you."

"I don't want to see anyone," I mumbled. "I need to get ready to go so that my meeting doesn't run late and I can make your court hearing. I want to see Rosie Hale to walk out that building a loaded woman."

"That would be nice." She grinned. "But, I think you might change your mind." She opened the door further, and I saw Jacob standing behind her with his hands shoved in his pockets awkwardly.

"Jake? What are you doing here?"

"I can go home if you want. I told Edward you probably wouldn't want any company right now. I wouldn't," he muttered.

"Edward called you?"

Rosalie stepped away from the door and let Jacob walk inside the room. "He was worried about you. Said he didn't know what to do to make you happy because all he wanted to do was rip everyone's throat out for you. Violent bastard."

I laughed once and shook my head at Edward's endless generosity and ability to anticipate what I'd need, when I'd need it. I needed someone I was comfortable with, someone I could have fun with, and who could understand what it was like to be forced into the spotlight without any preparation. And he'd sent me Jacob, even though they didn't really like each other much.

"Bella?" He stared at me earnestly. "I'm not much better. I want to kick those fuckers' asses for putting that look on your face."

"What look?"

"The 'I just watched my dog get run over by an eighteen wheeler' look."

"Oh. I look that bad?"

"Just sad."

My chin trembled. "Wouldn't you be? I don't know what I did to deserve to be talked about like that."

"You didn't do shit, Bell. People fucking suck."

A sob broke free from my chest. "Yeah."

He opened his arms and let me walk into them. I cried against his chest and finally let it all out. I'd wanted to be strong for Edward, but I found that I needed to purge myself of the emotional sting those words had caused before I could.

I composed myself enough to pull away and wipe at my eyes. "Sorry. Didn't mean to wig out on you."

His face twisted up. "Gah, he's going to kill me if I send you to your fucking meeting looking like that. Sit down. You screwed your makeup all up."

I glanced in the mirror and saw rings of black surrounding my eyes that connected with the streaks running down my cheeks. "I look like a mime!"

He laughed and made like he was in a box.

"Not funny. Help!"

He sat down with me and started wiping at my face with tissues. "So. What can I do for you? I'll be your sounding board."

I said the first thing that came to mind. "How do you deal with people saying such harsh things about you?"

"Ignore it." He shrugged. "Did you actually read the article?"

"No."

His face hardened. "Don't. It's not worth it."

I hadn't planned on reading it. Judging by Rosalie's rant after she did, I was sure I'd want to jump off a cliff if I read it for myself. She'd screamed at Edward, screamed at Emmett, and called her lawyer and demanded he did something about it, even though Edward tried to explain that he would have his own team of lawyers, headed by a Mr. Jason Jenks, begin working on the lawsuit paperwork this afternoon. As soon as the source's identity was confirmed, they would serve the paperwork to everyone involved at the same time, so it was unnecessary for Rosalie to get her lawyer involved.

God, I loved that girl.

"Edward tells me to ignore it, too. But I didn't ask for this like you guys did, so I can't just brush it off when someone calls me a whore. As girly as it sounds, it hurts my feelings."

"Bella, people say and do things behind each other's backs all the time, whether you're nameless or not. As a celebrity, you just have it thrown in your face by the tabloids and blogs out there. You can't pretend it's not happening like you used to." He picked up the liner pencil. "Close your eyes."

I did as I was told. "I know, but-"

"But nothing. I know it takes a while to figure it out, but damn, girl, get over yourself already. It's really fucking simple."

"Enlighten me then, asswad."

His chuckle rumbled in his chest. "Do you love Edward enough to stick by him through all the bullshit or not? If you don't, quit wasting his fucking time."

"You think I'm wasting his time?" I asked irritably.

He held up my hand and wiggled my ring between his fingers. "No. You said 'yes' even though you weren't looking to get married. You wouldn't have done that with anyone but Edward. But Bella, you have to let go of everything you knew before and find a way to come to terms with your new life. The old man deserves it, as much as it pains me to admit it."

I smiled knowingly at him. "You like him."

He curled his lip and grabbed the mascara. "I never said such a thing. Don't go putting words into my mouth, Swan."

I giggled. "Fine."

"Fine."

I bit down on my lip nervously. "Jacob?"

"Yo."

I laughed to myself. "What if I come to terms with being famous and it changes me into something I hate?"

"It'll change you, but I don't think you'll hate it," he responded, somewhat vaguely.

"Okay, oh wise oracle, what the fuck does that mean?"

"Fame changes everyone. You either let it go to your head or you don't. Those who don't, usually find a way to meld their old self with their new self. Be the confident, snarky bombshell _and _the shy, blushing bookworm."

"That's like an oxymoron, Jacob. It's impossible."

"No, it's not. It's every part of Bella Swan. You're all those things; you just need to stop questioning yourself all the time."

I didn't say anything else. I knew he was right. I was all those things he'd just described; Edward had spent countless nights describing all the things about me that he and everyone else loved so much because he needed me to believe it, too. But it was so hard to let that seed of doubt go. No one had ever--other than Rosalie--complimented me so much before, so it left me feeling... awkward and inexperienced.

It was obvious that I didn't have much self-confidence--living in LaLa Land with a mother who didn't bother with me hadn't helped at all. I was so much harder on myself than I was on others, because I held myself to such a high standard--no one else ever would, so if I didn't set goals for myself, I'd just be another cashier working a dead end job with no education and no way to escape.

Was that all it took? Just remind myself that I wasn't perfect and that no matter what I did, everyone would have their own perceptions of me? The only thing I could do was be myself on and off camera. It was enough for Edward, Rosalie, Emmett, Jacob, Angela, Charlie, Alice, and so many others.

Why wasn't it enough for me?

He sat back and observed his work. "There, you're done."

I looked at my reflection and laughed. I looked great; there was no way to tell that I'd been crying before. "Are you gay or something?"

"Nope."

"Then how-?"

"I was a child actor with two older sisters. You pick it up." He grinned. "You don't look like you belong in some cheesy French film now."

I rolled my eyes. "Enough with the lame mime jokes. I should have never said it."

His smile widened. "Want to pick up something to eat later in the week? I could use your opinion about that blond I met at the Black and White Ball..."

"You like her?"

He nodded. "She's great. And get this, she didn't even know who I was. She won tickets to the ball on some radio show and her best friend made her go."

"Wow. What's her name?"

"Bree. So it's a date?"

"Oh, I don't know." I chewed on my lip. "What about all the photographers? I already look like a slut, I-"

"Do you like Indian food?" he asked, cutting me off.

I looked at him strangely. "I like Indian food."

"There's this little hole in the wall place I know of. It's got good food, good service, and the best part is that there's no paps. Bring Edward."

I nodded and smiled. "Okay, then. It's a date." I took a deep breath and smoothed my hair down. "I have to go and be Edward's agent, now. Thanks for coming over. It helped--a lot."

"No prob." He stood up and started for the door. "Knock 'em dead."

* * *

I tugged the wig off and pulled down the mirror to fix my hair. After shaking it a couple times, it looked okay, so I got out of the car and followed the directions to the office building I'd written on a piece of paper. The click of my heels sounded around me rather than the sound of the paparazzo's questions and for the first time since New Year's Eve, I didn't have that weight of panic pressing at my chest.

I could actually breathe for a change.

Which made me realize that if Edward was willing to give up his career for us, I was possibly just selfish enough to let him.

Not exactly the most appealing trait I could have come to know about myself.

I frowned and pulled out my phone. I didn't like this train of thought.

"How's it feel to be all alone?" Edward asked pleasantly as a greeting.

"It feels great, baby. Like it used to. Why didn't we think of this before?"

"Because it takes a lot of time, effort, and extra people to pull a stunt like this off and eventually, the press becomes privy to your little chess game, so it's best to only do it in dire circumstances."

"Like now."

"I think now defines the meaning of 'dire', love." He paused. "So what do you need? Are you all right?"

"I'm fine." I scrunched up my face as I tried to figure out how to begin. "I just had a really shitty thought," I started.

"Right, then," he said slowly, warily. "What was it?"

"That I'm selfish enough to let you give up your career for me."

He sighed. "I'm not giving it up for you. I'm giving it up because it doesn't make me happy like it used to. I've already explained this all to you."

"I know. Refresh my memory, though? We've had a lot of shit going on."

He chuckled. "That we have. You make me happier than acting. Having a relationship and the prospect of a future with someone is what I want at this point in my life. I don't care if I'm a celebrity, and I certainly don't need the money. It's as simple as that. Does that help?"

"A little, I guess."

"Bella, you're trying so hard to be someone you're not because of what my job entails. That is not selfish at all. It's quite altruistic, really. You've put me before your own comfort and happiness. And if I can return the favor, then I won't hesitate to do so."

"But will you miss it?" I whispered.

"I thought I would. Acting filled a sort of void in me, but that's no longer the case. I don't have that emptiness in me like I used to, because I have you."

Pleasure hummed through me with his words. "God, you spoil me. Thank you for Jacob, by the way. He helped me get some perspective."

"You're welcome. Oh, and I intend to keep spoiling you until you grow tired of me."

"That's not gonna happen," I argued.

"Good. Now, go in there and get my money."

I laughed. "You got it, boss. I'll see you in a little bit."

"Till then," he chuckled.

I twisted my hands in front of me as I stared up at the massive downtown glass skyscraper that I was supposed to walk into in a matter of seconds. Inside, the studio executives waited to negotiate with me.

_What have you gotten yourself into, Bella?_

I assumed they thought they'd take advantage of me, but I was well-versed in Edward's demands and had even thought of a few things of my own to make his life easier when he was on set. Especially now that he had someone waiting for him at home.

Me.

I took a deep breath and strode through the doors to the reception desk, where I informed the bulky security guard of my name and purpose of visit while I fought the instinct reaction to cringe under his scrutiny.

He checked my ID and gave me a pass that allowed me to access the elevator. I headed to the elevators and swiped the card, watching the button glow a cheery orange while the elevator came down the thirty-odd flights to the lobby.

"Miss Swan," a familiar voice called out. "I wasn't expecting Edward's agent to be you."

I turned to see Aro Cruz walking--no, floating--gracefully toward me in a solid black suit. He was surrounded by the same people I'd seen him with at the ball.

Ah, fuck. My nerves had just grown exponentially.

"Mr. Cruz," I greeted. "It's nice to see you again. I take it you'll be in the meeting?" I asked, swallowing the lump in my throat down.

He nodded. "What sort of demands does Edward have for us?"

I clucked my tongue and smiled. "What kind of agent would I be discussing business before the meeting even began?"

The elevator doors opened with a dinging sound, and he motioned for me to step inside with a laugh. "I see why Edward chose you," he stated as he came to stand next to me. "You're pleasantly determined."

I watched him push the button, pressing my back against the wall and allowing the space needed to house the two massive men with him.

"Bella, these are my guards. Felix Samuels and Alec Knight."

"Nice to meet you," I murmured. "You need two guards?" I asked Aro.

"You'd be surprised. I understand you've found yourself in need of one as well?" He arched his brow and his deep brown eyes were staring a hole through me.

I shifted uncomfortably. "I guess so."

He took in a deep breath and shifted his eyes to the numbers above the elevator, watching it slowly climb. "Being involved with such a high profile man can be quite daunting, I understand."

"It's... an adjustment," I replied carefully. "One I'm willing to make."

I blinked at the admission. It had been nothing but truthful. Without thinking about it, I'd just answered my own question. I was willing to change everything to be with Edward. My stubborn desire to hold on to my old life had kept me from seeing that I had already been irrevocably altered from just meeting Edward and no amount of fighting against it could turn back time and change me back into the girl I used to be. I was still me; I had just been made better because of the coppery haired actor that I'd fallen so head over heels in love with. Nothing anyone did or said could change_ that_ as long as didn't allow it to.

He clapped his hands together, startling me out of my little epiphany. "Excellent! I'm so glad Edward's found happiness. I was beginning to wonder about that boy, you know."

"No, I don't know."

The elevator doors opened, and we all filed out to the hall.

"I've watched over his career for twenty years now. I was beginning to think he was gay and too afraid to admit it." He cackled with laughter. "Obviously, that's not the case."

I clamped my mouth shut against the ridiculous comment that tried to come out. Telling someone that I was indeed a girl and had the parts to prove it didn't seem like the best idea. Not at the moment, anyway.

Aro opened a set of double doors widely, allowing us all to enter the conference room before they closed behind us.

"Gentlemen." He greeted the two men sitting inside coolly. "This is Miss Bella Swan. Edward Masen's agent."

They stared at me impassively and said nothing.

I cleared my throat.

"Pardon their manners, Bella, they're old and crusty men with no senses of humor or any idea how to be polite to anyone. Caius, Marcus… say 'hello' to the pretty girl."

I gulped. That was the oddest introduction I'd ever had in my life.

The white haired man nodded his head, and I swear I thought his neck would snap and cause his head to roll off his perfectly tailored navy suit as he did. He was so unbelievably old and frail looking; there was no other way to describe it.

The other man had black, sweeping hair like off the cover of some cheesy romance novel with the face to match. But instead of enticing me, he did the opposite and made me want to run as far away from his deadened, stoic stare as possible.

Weird fucks.

I sat the contract on the table and took my jacket off. "Let's begin, shall we?"

_So I can get the fuck out of here as quickly as possible_, I added in my head.

"What's your hurry?" Aro laughed.

"I actually have someplace to be." I glanced over at the guards standing at the doors. "Are they going to be here the entire time?"

"You object?"

My eyes shot to the direction of Caius' bitter voice.

"No." I almost squeaked it, so I closed my eyes to gather myself again.

"Edward sent the contract you gave him with... well, with a margin full of notes, actually." I laughed nervously. "He didn't agree on the trailer size, the car, or the amount of money you all are trying to get away with paying him. And I can't blame him."

Aro's eyebrows shot up. "You can't?"

"No. This is Edward Masen. He's Hollywood's highest paid actor for a reason. Women and men alike love him, for obviously different reasons. Though, that's not always the case."

Marcus made a strange noise. A laugh, maybe?

I continued. "He has the ability to draw huge crowds to the box office--the biggest draw of any celebrity out there worldwide. He'll make you millions of dollars just by his presence in the film. Think about it. Edward isn't going to act for much longer. That in itself will draw even more people to the theaters.

"In fact, this is Edward's last film before his retirement."

A collective sound of surprise went through the room.

"I expect you to keep that information to yourselves." I smiled sweetly. "As I was saying, given his pending retirement, and the fact that this film pulls him away from his life, I think a small portion of the proceeds as well as anything Edward might need while on set is only fair."

Caius' eyes narrowed. "What does Edward expect us to give him?"

"Oh, he expects nothing. It's what I expect."

I threw down the amended contract I had drawn up for effect. It worked. They were all flabbergasted that I'd put so much thought into this.

"I took the liberty of revising Edward's contract. I expect Edward to receive a raise, so to speak. Of two million dollars along with a higher percentage of royalties from any of the film's merchandising and DVD sales."

"You've got to be joking."

I met Aro's stare levelly. "Do I look like I'm joking?" I didn't wait for him to answer. "Edward's fee for this film is thirty-two mil. I ran the projected numbers for the film's gross revenue and subtracted the budget as well as a few other paltry million to cover any unforeseen expenses, and you know what?" I leaned forward on the table. "You all are still making a killing from box office sales alone."

Aro laughed and took the contract. "You are completely unexpected, Miss Swan. I thought for sure I'd be able to slide a few things by you, but I can see that obviously isn't going to be the case."

"I may be young, but I'm not stupid. I make it a point to be good at everything I do. Add that the fact that my client happens to be my fiancé, and you can bet I'm not walking out of here with anything less than what I've drawn up."

I sat in a chair and let them all read the contract, unable to keep the smug smile off my face when Aro got to the part about Edward getting a two week break in the middle of filming.

When they were finished, they all looked up at me in complete and utter disbelief. I knew how well thought out, well-written, and ironclad that contract was.

And I was damn proud of it.

So I said the one thing left to say. "Well... are we in agreement?"


	25. Chapter 25

**********Thanks for all the recent adds and reviews... Thanks to Stratan for getting this back to me with lightning quickness. Really... insane. I didn't expect to see it until tomorrow. Everyone should thank the Stratepedia for his immense knowledge on... well, everything. He helped with this chapter, along with my lawyer-friend Neal so that Rosalie's settlement amount was realistic.**

**There's an interview about me and TMWCBM on P.I.C's FanFic Corner. It was posted yesterday, and it was seriously surreal to see something like that up. **

**www(dot)picffcorner(dot)blogspot(dot)com**

**Also, Twitter readalong is May 24th at 8:30EST and you should really join Twitter just for this reason alone. And follow me. JennyB0719 *snickers* Just kidding.**

Chapter 25

**Edward**

I opened the door and pushed my hair back from my forehead as I walked inside. The office was tiny, really, no bigger than my closet and was paneled wall to paneled wall in stacks of paperwork. An excellent sign, if there ever was one. It meant that even though the building was quite run down and the office itself wasn't in the most pristine condition, Jasper's friend was good at his job, and that was something I needed desperately right now.

A thin, raven haired woman peeked up from behind the computer monitor and blinked rapidly as she recognized me. She looked to be very pretty from the bits of her I could see around the monitor. Her skin was dark and tan, bearing a resemblance to Jacob's. Of course, my brain naturally went on a tangent and began wondering which tribe she was and if she and Jacob perhaps were from the same one, which would mean Bella could possibly know her as well.

I forced myself into the now, and I gave her a small, crooked smile and a quick wave, causing her eyes to bulge and expose their onyx color to me.

"Hello, is this Sam Uley's office?" I asked politely.

She nodded and stood up, and I nearly gasped at the sight of seeing her completely. Her face looked as if it had been ravaged by some animal. One side had been scarred from the corner of her eye down to the base of her throat, somehow missing her carotid artery. The cuts ran deep and were extremely thick, and I felt a twinge of sympathy for this woman who'd obviously survived such a vicious attack.

She smiled. It was a strange thing as only one side of her face could make the movement; the other side stayed in its paralyzed, turned down expression.

"Mr. Masen, I'm Emily Young. What brings you here?"

I cleared my throat. "I was actually hoping to hire Sam to investigate someone for me. My sister is engaged to a friend of his, Jasper Whitlock, and recommended him to me."

She arched a brow questioningly but refrained from asking. "Let me just tell him you're here. He's in the back sorting through the supplies for another ink cartridge. I swear, he couldn't find his way out of a paper bag."

I chuckled.

"Bear attack."

"Excuse me?"

"I said, 'Bear attack'." She brought her finger to her face, pointing at the scars in a circular motion. "Sam shot the bear before it could kill me, but it left me with this."

"What… erm… what were you doing, exactly?"

"Camping. Needless to say, we don't do that anymore."

"I see. I'm terribly sorry."

"Thanks. I'd get it fixed because I'm tired of people constantly looking at me pityingly, but something like that takes money."

"Uh-huh. You do know I haven't asked," I said with a grin.

She laughed. "I do. But it's usually easier to just come right out and tell people what happened to me, rather than have to put up with their stares. I'll send him right out."

She darted behind the door and left me to wander around the room. I examined pictures on the walls, stopping at one in particular of a large, well built Native American man in a MP uniform with Jasper at his side. Jasper looked so different in the picture. He stood in uniform; his hair was even shorter than it was now, and his presence was commanding and fierce.

Not the laid back, witty man I had come to know.

"I must admit this was never something I anticipated when I went into business for myself." The deep voice broke through my thoughts.

"What hadn't you anticipated?"

"A celebrity coming in for my services."

"Ah." I nodded my head with understanding. "Happens to the best of us, mate. "

He laughed once.

"You were Military Police?" I asked, looking back to where Sam was standing at the desk.

"I was."

"What made you decide to do this instead?"

He shrugged. "I served my time. Decided that the career path I'd chosen wasn't for me."

"You're good at this new chosen path?"

"The best."

"Excellent."

"Your sister's marrying Whitlock, huh?" He chuckled. "I thought that boy was never going to settle down."

"Well, apparently my sister has convinced him otherwise. She's quite good at that sort of thing, actually," I replied.

He picked up a legal pad and pen. "So is Emily. Sucks, doesn't it?"

"At times."

His smile faded. "You're not here just to chat. What's someone like you doing here?"

I explained the situation with James in detail, making sure to point out that I'd never had any trouble with the man until I began dating Bella, and that I wanted Sam to find out everything he could about him so that I had the necessary information to make some sort of move if it was required of me.

"Don't you think something is wrong with this picture? Or am I simply overreacting?" I asked in frustration when I was through.

"No, not overreacting at all. I'd do exactly the same thing in your position. Even if it was just a lapse in judgment—as doubtful as I think that is—it's better to be safe than sorry. If you ask me, it seems he wants something with your fiancée, and I'll make sure I find out what that is."

I gave him a tight nod. "Thanks. Here's my number; ring me as soon as you've found something."

A shake of hands, and I was on my way to the courthouse to meet Bella, over-analyzing everything all over again. I parked the car and stared down at the wheel, concentrating on stopping the insanity that was going through my brain.

I could_ not_ continue to do this. I'd never realized until now how much of an insecure git I truly was and it made me all too aware of how Bella felt with me each and every day and that the feeling grew when we were in front of a camera. I was so used to being detached—numbed—from the people surrounding me that being so involved with someone brought out horrible traits of mine I hadn't known existed. It had been so long since I'd loved. Lauren was just a ruse; I was certain of that now, but Bella was it, if there ever was such a thing.

It was a thought that had me smiling enormously. I'd been a huge believer in love and marriage my entire life since I'd born witness to it with my parents and then with Carlisle and Esme. Now, I had what they had—possibly more—with Bella. It had me wanting to steal her away and marry her now, even though I knew rationally that was a mistake. We still had so much to get through before we could really be happy together.

I briskly walked to the courthouse, greeting people politely as they recognized me and spoke to the press to waste a bit of time, even though I was still harboring ill feelings toward them for every tear that had come from Bella's eyes in the last eight days. I'd always accepted it as a part of my life—from the day I began acting—and needed to focus on regaining that mentality, regardless of Bella's feelings toward our relationship's publicity. I did her no good constantly stressing out over everything and attempting to shield her from it.

I stood outside the doors in the shadows and watched for Bella's arrival. I was anxious to know how her meeting went, only because I wanted to see the smile that Alice had promised would be on her face after everything she'd been through this morning.

It was almost comical, the way everyone's heads whipped to the direction that Bella was walking from. Emmett had met with her when she parked Rosalie's car and was walking with her, making sure those around her kept their distance from Bella.

Hiring him as Bella's bodyguard was by far the best decision I'd ever made, other than finally giving in to the pull Bella had for me.

She'd worn the clothes we'd bought at Barney's, and looked nothing like the girl I'd first laid eyes on. Even though I'd seen them on her before I left her flat this morning, she still took my breath away.

She looked polished, professional, and ruthless but still managed to have that innocence about her that I found so endearing. Her posture seemed straighter, like she had finally succumbed to that confidence I always knew she had hidden inside her, and I loved seeing how spectacular she could be in the spotlight. She met up with me, surrounded by photographers, and wrapped her arms around me and ignored everything around us, all while having that glorious smile on her face.

How I wished she could be like that always. But I knew it was unrealistic for me to expect her to suddenly change overnight. This was all so new for her; it was understandable that it would take time to adjust to it all—no matter how impatient I was to have _my_ Bella back.

"I killed it, baby!" she squealed in my ear.

I chuckled and pried her arms from my neck so that I could kiss her properly. "Mmm, that's wonderful. I take it the meeting went as we expected?"

She nodded excitedly and handed me a manila envelope. "Here's the contract. You need to sign it and send it to your lawyers."

I nodded, well aware of the process, and pulled it out. I skimmed through the legal jargon until I got to the part I was most interested in. I had every confidence that Bella could negotiate the changes I'd made to the contract without any issue, but I still wanted to read it for myself.

I hadn't expected what was staring back at me, though.

"You got me two more million?" I asked in shock. "And another two percent in royalties?"

"Uh-huh." She grinned. "Keep going."

I skimmed through the contract swiftly with anticipation of what she'd done. A bigger trailer, a better car, those were all good in themselves, but what amazed me was that she'd somehow negotiated a two week break in the middle of filming, something completely unheard of.

"I get two weeks off?" My mouth hung open with my inability to process this. "How did you do this?"

She shrugged. "I told them you were retiring and that this was your last film. I ran the projected numbers and told them they'd be stupid not to give you what you wanted and risk losing you."

I brought her against me and kissed her with an aggression that surprised me. What surprised me even more was that Bella didn't immediately pull away from me since we were in front of all these cameras.

"You're unbelievable," I breathed against her mouth.

She giggled. "Thanks."

"What are the two weeks off for?"

"Well, you don't start filming until late in the year. I thought maybe we'd be... you know." She blushed furiously.

"We'd be what?" I asked in confusion.

"Having a baby. Or trying to, anyway. I didn't want filming to interrupt that. Was I wrong?"

Laughter bubbled out of my chest. "No. That's... My God, Bella, I hadn't even considered it. I assumed you'd want to wait until you'd finished graduate school."

She shook her head. "I'm not going to make you wait that long, Edward. I don't see why we can't manage both. You can hang out at home with the baby while I'm in class or studying."

I laughed again. "Just call me Mr. Mum."

"Do you have a problem with that?" Her eyes widened dramatically. "Shit, I'm sorry, I just went and made all these plans and didn't even consider what you wanted. I-"

I cut her off with a kiss. "Bella, stop. I want to be hands on. Definitely. Just like I'm sure you want to be as well."

"I do." Her smile brightened. "It feels good to make plans for the future. The last week has been so shitty."

"It has," I agreed. "You seem different, love. More like you."

"I kind of had an epiphany," she admitted softly. "I was so hung up on being my old self that I wasn't willing to see that I've already changed because of you. All this shit that comes with you is no big deal as long as I don't allow it to be. You've managed to stay true to yourself all this time; I can, too."

My blood stirred with the words I'd longed to hear from her. I shifted us so that we weren't facing our audience and stroked her cheek. "I want you," I murmured. "Is it wrong that those words make me want you so?"

Those wide eyes stared back at me with mirth. "I want you. If I was sure someone wouldn't follow us, I'd find a closet and have my way with you."

I groaned and pressed my lips to hers. "Get away from me before I do something we'll both regret," I said thickly.

"Please do," she whispered before dragging herself away.

She smiled as I fingered her hair in an attempt to compose myself. Once I was certain my pecker wasn't forming a tent in my trousers, I took her hand with mine and led her to the x-ray machines.

"You look really good, love," I complimented, watching the blood rush to her cheeks with my words.

"Thanks. You look good, too. I love that suit."

"One of my many," I said wryly. "Occupational hazard."

I walked into the courtroom with Bella, and everyone's eyes turned toward us as we chose a seat in the back. Some looks were speculative while others were smug, but there was only one person whose eyes I was focused on at the moment.

Royce.

Those hard blue eyes stared back at me hatefully, and I returned his stare with just as much venom as I could. He'd caused so much damage to Rosalie and Bella's flat because of his inability to keep his anger and his need to drink himself to the point of sheer stupidity in check. He'd ruined his family's flawless reputation and his career in a moment of madness, and he'd nearly drug me down with him. If Zafrina and I wouldn't have worked so hard to distance myself from the situation, the issues Bella and I had with the press now would have been tremendously worse.

If there was one thing I knew, it was how good Zafrina truly was at her job. Having said that, this fiasco with the USC student blabbing untrue things about Bella to the press was unacceptable. In all the time I'd worked with Zafrina, I'd never lost my cool with her like I did today, but strangely enough, even though I considered Zafrina a friend, I didn't regret it; she'd deserved to be reprimanded for the massive screw up we were now dealing with.

I was beginning to wonder if there was some truth to Bella's claim of Zafrina's feelings toward me. I thought it was completely absurd, but I could be quite dense at times when it came to the opposite sex. The ability I had to judge and decipher Bella's moods and emotions was something I'd never experienced until now. Bella, however, was amazingly astute at times.

I finally broke away from Royce's stare, more concerned with Rosalie than I was Royce's obvious distaste toward me now. I couldn't really blame him; I was sure if I was in his position and in the same state of denial about my problems with rage and alcohol, I probably would have blamed the one person who showed up in time to render me unconscious and allow the police to take me into custody also.

Rosalie briefly turned to see what everyone's attention was focused on. Her eyes widened as soon as she saw me sitting with Bella. She whipped her head back around to speak to Emmett, who nodded at her question, and then turned to face me again.

"Thank you," she mouthed.

I wasn't sure what she was thanking me for, so I simply inclined my head to her politely.

Bella nudged me with her elbow. "Rosalie's surprised you're here."

"Why?"

She shrugged. "I told her that you were coming, but I don't think she believed me. I think she assumed you'd worry about the press' reaction to you being here and back out."

"Right. Like I've ever cared what the press says about me."

"I know that, but Rosie doesn't. She barely knows you, remember?"

I glanced over at her. "Then I suppose we should fix that sometime."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm marrying you; your best friend should get to know and approve of me," I explained. "I've not really gone about this the way I should've."

"You did what was perfect for us. You know me and what I like."

"You think?" Why I needed the reassurance, I wasn't sure. Possibly because the idea that Bella and I were getting married sometimes didn't feel real. Like she'd change her mind, or I'd wake up to find her place in my life was still as my indifferent assistant.

The realization that it all could be so much different if I'd never pushed for her to acknowledge her feelings before I filmed _Rogue_ caused a sharp pain to lance through me.

"Of course I do, stupid."

I laughed, abruptly taken away from the horrid thought.

"You think I'd marry you if I didn't think that?"

This was very true.

"No, love," I said, still laughing. "I think you're much too smart to get into something so serious without thinking it through."

She narrowed her eyes and jabbed at my stomach playfully. "Good answer."

I grinned crookedly. "My parents taught me well."

She grabbed my face to kiss my cheek. "Yes, they did, baby."

* * *

Our glasses tapped the table as we all licked the salt off our hands.

"Five million!" Rosalie screeched as she threw her tequila shot back.

I sucked on the lime with a sour face and shook my head. "No more." I was already feeling the effects of the alcohol burning through my blood like wildfire.

Bella giggled. "Lightweight."

I snorted. "This coming from someone whose face flushed after the second shot? Which reminds me," I continued. "You should stop before you become a bitch."

My eyes widened drastically as soon as the word came out of my mouth. And then_ I_ giggled.

"Eddie's drunk!" Emmett boomed.

"I'm not going to be a bitch," Bella protested with a petulant pout. "We have too much to celebrate!"

"Like the fact that we are in here and the press is out there?" I asked, taking a swig of water to try to calm the spinning of my head.

"Yep. That's one of the reasons."

"What's the other?" Rosalie asked, leaning forward a little too roughly and causing the empty shot glasses to clank together and fall.

"Edward. Your win. My win. It's a good day." She grinned excitedly. "Let's dance. I want to dance."

I stood up to lead Bella out to where the DJ was playing only to sit right back down. I laughed—well, more like giggled—and stood up again, cheering loudly when I'd finally managed to succeed.

"After you, love." I made a gesture with my hand, causing her to snicker.

"Freak."

"Pissed," I corrected. "It's actually quite pleasant. I'm tingly all over."

My hand snuck up and squeezed her arse; she yelped. "Edward!"

I shrugged unrepentantly. "It was right there."

She rolled her eyes and grabbed my suit jacket in her hands, yanking me forward. I nearly toppled over on her.

"Not the best idea, Bella. I may be tingly, but I really can't judge where my feet are at the moment."

She scrunched up her nose and laughed. It was a bright, incredibly joyful laugh that I'd not heard since the night we got engaged.

I smiled widely and pulled her to me. "I love seeing you like this."

"What? Drunk as fuck but not screaming at anyone?"

"No, though that is nice bonus," I chuckled and started moving my hips with hers. "Uninhibited and happy. I was beginning to think it was a mistake for you to be with me. Ever since New Year's, you've been so-"

She put her hand over my mouth. "Shh. No talking like that. It was an adjustment, nothing more."

I nodded, conceding.

She stared up at me while we danced, smiling that excited grin and watching me with sparkling eyes.

"I love you, Edward Masen," she said suddenly.

Another wide smile broke out over my face. "I love you, Isabella Swan."

The atmosphere took an abrupt turn as the natural chemistry that constantly flowed between us overtook us. Bella blew out a shaky breath and watched me carefully, trying to gauge my next move.

"I want to kiss you," I whispered. But I wasn't sure how she'd react. I was still wary of that confidence she'd displayed earlier. It could disappear with the snap of my fingers.

She licked her lips, and I moaned as I watched those plump, pink lips glisten with the flashing lights. She nodded, and I wasted no time ducking down to taste her.

Her heady, natural flavor was mixed with the peppermint gum she'd popped in her mouth and the residue of tequila from all the shots she'd done with us earlier. My lips moved avidly with hers and before I knew it, I'd crushed her against me.

My hands roamed over her arse and up her sides toward her breasts. My brain was screaming for me to stop—reminding me that we were in a public venue and pictures of us together like this could be everywhere in the morning—but my hands seemed to have a mind of their own.

They didn't care a bit.

And suddenly, neither did I. Whether it was the alcohol still burning through my body or me simply staking my claim, I very nearly undressed Bella in the middle of the bar. I wanted her with a desperation that was still so new and fierce; the desperation that had only ever happened with the one woman who'd stolen my heart with just a random collision on the sidewalk and a murmuring of apology.

I grasped the collar of her jacket, stopping my hands from their inappropriate behavior, only for my hips to push into hers. One hand suddenly shot down to cup her arse, giving me the friction I was longing for.

She moaned loud enough to be heard over the drumming music, and I thought I might lose my mind.

Emmett whooped and laughed. "Get her, Eddie!" His bass voice filtered over the loud music, and I immediately snapped out of it.

I glanced around, noting the few people gawking with camera phones and cursed.

Bella's eyes scanned the room in confusion, her cheeks filling with color as soon as she'd discovered the reason for my sudden outburst.

"Right. Well…" I said uncomfortably, straightening up.

She fought with a smile and then—amazingly—laughed. "Guess we gave them a show, huh?"

"I suppose so." I laughed nervously.

"Can we go home and um, finish?" Her blush deepened.

Like she needed to ask.

I paid the tab, ignoring all of Rosalie's protests, and started to lead Bella out of the bar, only to be stopped by a flurry of fans begging for pictures and autographs.

I looked to Bella for approval, because once I started, it could be hours before we finally made it through the doors.

She nodded and took a step back, which was no good for me.

I pulled her forward and literally signed autographs until my hand cramped and posed for pictures until my face hurt. The alcohol had thankfully been filtered through my system, and I was feeling more like myself when we finally walked through the doors and into the awaiting mob.

"I'm sorry," I shouted to Bella over the questions being hurtled at us.

"It's okay. It's part of your job. Too bad my buzz is gone, though."

"So is mine."

She looked around and frowned. "Um, okay. How do you want to deal with this? Maybe I should answer a few questions?" She glanced up at me uncertainly.

"It's completely up to you."

"You are no fucking help," she muttered.

I laughed. "We don't have to talk to them if you don't want. We can just go home. They can wait until tomorrow."

"I know, but you've always said…"

"If you give them a little, they back off," I finished for her.

"I'm about to test that theory."

"By all means." I smiled andmoved aside.

She scanned the crowd, trying to decipher their words while picking out the friendliest face of the group. Her eyes settled on Eric, and she smiled.

"Hi."

He blinked; I had to swallow my laughter.

She tried again. "Hi. Eric, right?"

"You're going to talk to me?" he asked in disbelief.

She nodded. "I thought I'd try something different today."

His eyes flickered to me, but I didn't interfere.

"What do you want to know?" she asked.

"Um, the article I guess. Know who the source was?"

"We're working on it."

"Is any of it true?"

She glowered at him. "What do you think?"

"I think that's a 'no'," he laughed.

"Smart man." She paused, debating something. "To be honest, Edward's only the second guy I've ever slept with."

I coughed and sputtered in surprise. "Jesus, love."

"What?" she demanded. "It's true."

"I'm aware of that. The rest of the world, however, was not," I replied dryly.

Eric laughed. "Ever?"

"Ever. I've dated one person before him, but it didn't last long."

"Are the two of you serious?"

Bella held up a finger. "Sidebar."

I chuckled and bent down so that she could whisper to me.

"I want to tell him."

"About the engagement?" I questioned.

She nodded.

"I don't know, Bella. We're planning to announce it Monday…"

"Yeah, _Zafrina _wanted us to announce it Monday, but she didn't do shit to keep that fucking article from being published. I don't owe her a thing," she snapped out angrily.

I held up my hands in surrender. There was no arguing with Bella when she was this determined.

She spun around and flashed her ring. "You could say that."

Flashes erupted around us, and Bella smiled at me through them. It was a feeling that was indescribable to announce to the world that we loved each other enough to get married, and a moment that seemed to suspend time. All I could see and feel was Bella.

"When are you planning to get married?" Eric asked eagerly, interrupting it.

I shook my head once, silently telling her to keep that part private.

"I just made your day, didn't I?" she asked, changing the subject.

He beamed. "You have no idea. You know you'll be on 'bump watch' now, right?"

I laughed, anticipating her reaction.

Her brows knit. "What's 'bump watch'?"

He pointed to her stomach. "They'll all assume you're pregnant and going for a shotgun wedding."

Her mouth dropped open and her hands flew up to cover herself up. "I look pregnant?" she screamed.

My laughter grew. She hadn't disappointed.

"Shut up! It's not funny!" She slapped my arm, causing me to laugh more. "He said I looked pregnant! I look fat!"

"No! No!" Eric shook his head wildly. "Not at all!"

"Oh." She relaxed a little and blushed.

"So are you?" he prompted.

"No. But even if I was, I wouldn't tell you," she replied.

"Why not?"

"That's not something I'm willing to share. I may be engaged to one of the biggest actors in America-"

"The world, Bella," Eric corrected.

She smiled politely. "The _world_," she continued, "but we both still want to keep our lives as private as possible."

I took this as my cue to step in. "Anything else you can find out in the interview we plan to do next week," I said, wrapping my arm around Bella's waist protectively.

Eric nodded and backed away. "Thanks, Bella." He grinned. "Thanks a lot."

"You're welcome."

I guided her through the crowd and kissed her hair. "You did wonderful," I murmured.

"Yeah?"

I stopped at the car and cupped her face with my hands. "Yeah." I kissed her softly. "Everyone is going to love you. Just as I do."

* * *

**Bella**

"No. This is just... No."

The stylist huffed. "I know you're not into feathers and drama, but this is fabulous. Trust me. You and Edward dressed as a bride and groom on the cover will have those magazines flying off the shelves."

I stared at my reflection in the mirror and sighed. It was all too much—the makeup, the hair, the dress—everything was ridiculous. I looked like I was pretending to be someone I wasn't. I wasn't into this fancy shit. I dressed for comfort. Even the dress I picked out for the ball was comfortable. This...The bodice was tight and was beaded and strapless. How the stylist managed to keep it from falling down was beyond me; I didn't have much to hold it up. The skirt was plumed to the point that I could barely walk without trying to tip over. My hair was tightly pulled back in a chignon, my lips were painted a ruby red, and my eyes had been lined with so much black liner, I wondered if the effect wouldn't wind up being permanent.

"Fine," I grumbled. "I'll wear the dress that makes me look like a duck."

The stylist laughed. "You don't look like a duck. I promise."

I picked the skirt of the dress up so that I could actually walk to the set. I opened the trailer door and glared at Edward. He looked so relaxed in his charcoal gray suit. The green of his tie brought out the green of his eyes, and I could barely breathe when those piercing eyes met mine. Times like these—when I saw how unbelievably gorgeous Edward was—had me feeling like a schoolgirl with an enormous crush on some teen heartthrob. My heart raced and my head swam, and between the weight of the dress and my lack of breathing, I could feel myself literally swooning at the sight of him. Until I remembered what I was wearing.

Beauty is pain...

Well, fuck that.

"I hate you."

He gave me a devastating smile that would normally have me dragging him into a dark corner so that I could sate the ache it caused inside me and pulled at the cuffs of his suit. "No, you don't."

"Yes, I do." I pulled up the poufy white fabric of my dress so that I could walk and stomped toward him. "I look like a fucking fuzzy marshmallow." I glanced down and decided "marshmallow" was not the right word. "I look like a Yeti. A God damned snow beast."

He laughed. "You look like a bride. My bride."

"You can guarantee I won't be caught dead in something this... hideous on our wedding day."

He adjusted his tie and walked a circle around me as his eyes raked over the dress; he laughed again. "It's..." He shook his head. "I've no words."

"I hate you," I repeated with a snarl.

"Hate is such a strong word."

"I'm staying at my place tonight. And you're not allowed."

He cupped the back of my neck and bent to nuzzle my neck before trailing open-mouthed kisses over my exposed collar bone. I nearly purred through my anger. "You're delusional. And quite stunning as a fuzzy marshmallow. I could devour you right here in front of all these people." He sighed and pulled away. "The sooner we start the shoot, the sooner you can go home and pout."

I almost pouted, but I caught myself. "Good." I grabbed the dress and somehow made my way to the photographer without stumbling over the monstrosity I was wearing.

I walked over to the rail and stared out at the city below. Edward came over and leaned against the railing, glancing over at me and chuckling to himself. _Click._

"Am I that ugly?" I asked, arching my brow and trying not to smile back.

He rolled his eyes. "I know this isn't something you'd normally choose for yourself, but you look extremely glamorous and very Hollywood. It simply reinforces the feeling that you belong with me." He stared out into the distance and let me ponder that.

"I do belong with you," I whispered suddenly.

"And yet you hate me," he teased.

I simply laughed.

He held his hand out to me. "Come, let's get this over with so that you can change out of that God-awful dress. I might just go blind having to look at it for the next hour."

"Asshole," I replied, taking his hand.

We stood in front of the observatory, posing together with LA as our backdrop. Over and over the photographer shot us laughing as we attempted to align ourselves together in the perfect, overly-romantic pose, but the dress kept getting in the way. Edward's face couldn't be seen over the puffs of fabric, my boobs were shoved up to my chin from the boning of the bodice, or Edward couldn't find a good place to hold on to my body when the photographer wanted to shoot a damsel in distress scene. It was never ending.

I waved my arms for them to stop. "Forget it. I'll be right back."

Edward stood up and looked at me curiously. "Love?"

"Just a second." I yanked the dress up to my thighs and took off running toward the trailer.

I managed to untie the bodice myself and took in a deep breath as the dress fell to the floor and relieved me of its weight. I slipped on my bra and jeans then started rummaging through the stacks and racks of clothes that the stylist had brought along with her, searching for that sliver of pink I'd spotted earlier.

I finally found it and grinned with triumph before I started pulling the pins out of my hair. I stared at my face in the mirror and scowled then set about taking all this makeup off. I didn't want to pretend to be some perfect specimen of the female form for everyone reading the interview. I wanted to be me; I was determined to be me. That included the messy hair and lack of makeup. People could take it or leave it.

When my skin was fresh and a little red from the scrubbing, I put the shirt and my shoes on and ran back to where Edward was waiting for me.

The look on his face was priceless.

"You're joking," he laughed. "'Team Edward'?"

I tugged at the hem of the shirt and grinned. "I'm 'Team Edward' all the way, baby."

"Good to know. But really. Pink?"

I yanked him forward by his tie and kissed him. _Click_. "Shut up."

"All right," he mumbled against my lips.

This time, there was no posing. It was just Edward and me being extremely goofy in front of the camera. I made a face at him, and he laughed. It was so natural, the surrounding photographers, assistants, and miscellaneous equipment seemed out of place.

It suddenly felt completely and utterly wrong. Like they were invading in some private moment that was meant for only the two of us to share.

Edward noticed the shift in me immediately.

"Hey," he whispered, taking my chin and raising it to see me. "It will all be over before you know it."

"Don't they have enough?" I whined.

"I'm sure they have more than enough. A few more minutes and we'll put our street clothes back on and talk to that journalist over there." He pointed to a brunette who was watching us closely.

"And say what?"

"Whatever comes to mind, love."

"Doesn't _Zafrina_ have some sort of sheet with all our answers neatly typed up?" I asked snidely.

His green eyes bore into me, sparking with fire, and I shrank back a little."You're going to start that here? Now?"

I opened and closed my mouth a couple times before I finally shook my head. "No," I squeaked. Jesus, the man was sexy and scary all at once.

He looked at me sheepishly. "Sorry. I don't want to argue with you, yet you are bloody determined to do so over my publicist."

I started to bite down on my lip but then figured the photographer would choose that second to snap a picture, so I didn't. I started playing with the lapels of his jacket instead. "I'm not trying to start a fight. I'll stop. I know you meant everything you said and that I have nothing to worry about when it comes to her feelings for you. But after what happened with that article, I seriously want to kick her ass."

"And rightfully so. But do we need to dwell on it constantly? It's over and done with. Nothing can change the past."

"Really? You think I'm right in wanting to kill her?"

He grinned crookedly. "Yes, really. Do you think I was just full of shit the other day when I shouted at her? When I stood up for you?"

"No."

"Good. Have I mentioned how incredibly well you're doing?"

"No," I said again, this time with a blush.

"You are. You're a natural in front of the camera. Very loose and limber. I'd love to see where that can get us when we get back home, baby."

I giggled in spite of the desire I had to moan. God, wouldn't that have been embarrassing.

One final pose—the pose that had me lying down on the ground with my hair fluffed around me and Edward's head resting on my shoulder blade as he wrapped his hand around my arm and stared down at me—and we were finished.

Finally.

I went back to the trailer to gather my stuff, not bothering to change out of the 'Team Edward' shirt, and met back up with Edward at his black Bentley. He opened the door for me and helped me inside.

I watched—well, more like eye-fucked him—as he walked to the driver's side and opened the door. There was something about that white button down shirt and jeans of his that had me wanting to destroy the buttons as I ripped it away from his gorgeous body and then fucked him in his cushy leather seat.

But I didn't… an amazing feat, if I was being honest with myself. That seat was seriously calling out to me.

"So… tell me again why we're driving the Bentley?" I asked, trying to ignore the ridiculous demand my body suddenly had for him.

"It can't sit in the garage all winter," he responded vaguely.

I narrowed my eyes. "All right, what are you hiding?"

He chuckled but kept his eyes on the road. "I'm not hiding a thing."

If I hadn't known how good of an actor he was, I would have believed him.

We drove to the location of the interview—a bar closed especially for this occasion—with the brunette right behind us. Edward parked and made me wait to get out so that he could open the door and be his usual protective self around the group of photographers that had followed us from the shoot.

I simply rolled my eyes, which made the woman laugh.

"I take it you're not into chivalry, Miss Swan," she said casually, walking over to us.

"It's not something I'm used to," I answered. "But since it's Edward…" I trailed off and shrugged.

She held out her hand. "I'm Carmen Hughes. It's nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you," I responded, shaking her outstretched hand. I didn't know why, but I wasn't nervous at all. It was just one more thing to check of the list of to-do's today before I could go back to Edward's and relax.

Score for Bella.

Edward urged me forward. "Let's continue this inside. Away from prying eyes."

"Of course. The last thing I need is for one of those leeches to catch wind of what you'll talk to me about." Carmen grinned and winked at me.

We sat down at a table and ordered drinks—water for Edward and me, and a vodka cranberry for Carmen—and made idle conversation while she got herself set up.

She turned on the tape recorder, and Edward's arm instinctively wrapped around my shoulders and brought me toward him.

"Bella, tell me, what's it like to date someone as famous as Edward Masen?"

Edward gave me something like a worried look but said nothing. I couldn't tell if he was worried about my possible answer or about my comfort, so I ignored him.

"It's…" I wasn't sure how to describe it. "Surreal. I see him as Edward, _my_ Edward, and to know that there are people out there who worship the ground he walks on is a little strange."

"How do you mean?"

"Well, he's perfect—for me—but he's certainly not perfect. I don't think anyone is worthy of the pedestal he's been put on."

She moved to Edward and smiled. "How does that make you feel?"

"Thankful."

She laughed. "Seriously? Most celebrities would have a bruised ego."

"Not this one," I replied.

He nodded and grinned at me. "I'm thankful that she sees me for who I am and not what's on screen or in print. It's something I've looked for my entire adult life."

"You found it with a girl seventeen years younger than you? After spending countless nights in countless women's beds? Most people have a hard time believing that."

He seemed to be fighting for the right words. "I don't really care what people believe. I found what I was looking for in Bella. Not the age or the package it came in, but with Bella herself. It was like… God, I'm going to sound ridiculous, but it was like my soul recognized her from the moment I laid eyes on her. There was never any question of whether she was meant for me or not, it was always a question of 'Can I give in to this?'. I think I would have regretted it until the day I died had I not."

He was so heartfelt and serious, my eyes stung with tears.

I kissed his cheek. "Aw, that's sweet, baby."

He chuckled and ran his thumb over my jaw comfortingly. "I wasn't trying to be sweet or romantic, love; I was trying to be honest."

"Is the sex good?"

I cackled loudly at the uncharacteristic mottling of Edward's face.

Carmen shrugged. "I had to ask."

"Have you not taken a good look at him?" I asked, still laughing slightly. "What do you think?"

We spoke about our relationship; how we met, our first 'I love you', and our plans for the future. We were honest about everything, from kids to Edward's eventual retirement and the fact that we planned to get the hell out of LA. The only thing we made sure to stay vague about was the wedding itself. Not that it was hard. With the exception of our agreement to elope, neither of us had a clue when we'd actually end up married or where the event would take place, something that Carmen had an extremely hard time believing.

"I don't care where we are or what she's wearing when we get married. She could show up at the courthouse in her pajamas, for all I care. I just want to marry her," Edward insisted.

"Ooh, we could do the drive-thru ceremony in Vegas. You know, be too lazy to get out of the car," I teased with a grin.

"So you really don't know what you want," she said skeptically.

"No." I shook my head. "And for me, that makes it exciting. We could just up and decide to get married tomorrow if the mood suited us."

"It suits me to do it now," Edward said with a playful glint in his eye.

We started talking about my childhood, about life in Forks with Charlie and here in LA with Renée. I was evasive when talking about my mother, not wanting to blab to the entire world that I was currently not speaking to her or that she was going to have a baby in a few months. My mother, for all her idiocy, was not the one involved with a famous man, and I had enough respect for others' privacy—now that I'd lost most of mine—not to invade it.

Carmen sat back and took a sip of her drink. "People talk about you two constantly. There's negativity, speculation and doubt, and then there's positivity and support. What do you say to those who already hate you? And those who like you?"

"Thank you," I responded simply.

"Thank you?" Edward asked incredulously. "Are you serious?"

"Well, yeah," I said, surprised by his disbelief. "They made me realize that you matter more to me than anything else. I learned to thicken my skin and ignore everything because I can't please everyone at once. And I'm not going to try." I paused. "But I do want to know what makes them think they have the right to be so cruel about me. I'd like to see them date a famous person and see how well they do. Most people would cry with the amount of pressure the press puts on you. And do you have any idea how claustrophobic you feel that first time walking out into a crowd of photographers?"

"So I take it that wasn't a good experience for you," Carmen said carefully.

"No. But like I said, it doesn't matter now. And if they keep doing it, there won't be any more thank you's, there'll be fuck you's instead."

Edward laughed and kissed my temple. "There's my girl."

"Okay, I have to ask this. Tanya. Everyone wants to know what exactly is going on."

"I don't know, but if you find out, give me a call," I said sarcastically.

"All I know is that I started dating Bella, and she started acting quite strange. Then at the ball, she showed me some photos of me outside Bella's flat and lost it. I hate that it's turned out this way." Edward's voice was laced with sadness.

I stared at him in shock. "Do you really?"

"She's a good actress and was always professional. I may not necessarily be a fan of hers personally, but that doesn't mean I want this war between us."

"What do you think her reaction's going to be when she sees that your contract has been leaked and we all know she's been lying about her heartbreak?"

"She'll shit." Edward groaned. "Well, she will. I'd like to be there when she does. Maybe watch her bobble head fly off her shoulders when she screams. That'd be nice."

"You seem bitter."

I stared at Carmen evenly. "You have no idea. That woman tried to destroy my life and relationship with Edward and neither of us even knows why other than the bullshit reason she gave us."

"Which was?"

"She didn't want my relationship with Bella becoming public to ruin her career." Edward took a sip of water and frowned.

"Do you think she loves you?" Carmen questioned Edward.

"No," he answered quickly.

"It happens, though," she objected. "Falling in love with a costar on set. We hear about it all the time."

"No," he repeated more firmly and then sighed. "Tanya loves herself. That's all it is."

We talked a little bit more about the publicity surrounding our relationship and Edward's protectiveness of me, and then we finally wrapped up the interview.

When Carmen finally left, I sagged against Edward and blew out an exhausted breath. "God, how do you do this day after day, year after year? My brain's all mushy."

"It gets tiring, especially when you're promoting a film for the two months prior to its release," he admitted.

I didn't want to think about that upcoming separation, so I ignored it entirely.

"I have a surprise for you."

"I knew it!" I exclaimed victoriously. "I knew you were hiding something."

He chuckled. "It's good, I promise. We just need to wait a moment until our guests arrive."

I pursed my lips at the statement, but knew Edward well enough not to bother with asking. "Okay. I'm going to make a bathroom run then."

I darted to the back of the bar and into the bathroom, rushing through everything in anxious excitement for whatever lay ahead. I came out of the bathroom and found him standing with his back turned to me, so I snuck up behind him and wrapped my arms around his waist.

"Um, hello?"

The voice was all wrong—not the strong, unknowingly seductive voice that gave me chills—and I immediately stepped back. The man turned around and I wanted to just shrink into a ball and hide in some deep, dark corner of the bar. My face grew uncomfortably hot, flaming with my embarrassment, and I sputtered incoherently as I tried to apologize.

He looked just like Edward from behind—same sinewy build, same chaotic coppery-hued hair—but his face was nothing like Edward's. It wasn't the symphony of angular lines I loved to stare at, and his eyes were a watery blue color instead of the bright green I was used to seeing look back at me with adoration.

"Shit," I finally managed to choke out. "I'm so sorry; I thought you were someone else."

"Edward." He answered pleasantly.

Now I was confused. "Yeah."

"Bella!" Edward called over from the other side of the bar. "I see you met Steve, my stunt double."

_Steve. Really? His name is Steve?_

"Hi," I said shyly.

He gave me an amused grin. "Hi."

Edward walked over and looked at me strangely. "Are you all right?"

"Fine," I squeaked. My face was still burning with my mortification.

He looked between us a few times before finally speaking. "Steve and a friend of his are going to take the Bentley back to the house and pretend to be us."

My eyes widened. "They are?"

Edward threw me a lopsided smile. "I asked them to sneak inside so that I could take you on a date without being surrounded by the world and his wife."

I giggled with his idiom. "We're going on a date?"

"We are," he confirmed and then laughed. "Must you always question it?"

I rocked on my feet and grinned with anticipation. "No."

Steve and his brunette friend donned their sunglasses and left through the front door while Edward and I hung back for a few minutes before attempting to leave ourselves. Edward said a quick goodbye to the owner of the bar and walked me to the door that led to the alley, where another black Bentley was parked.

"Um…."

"This one's mine. That one was one I rented from the dealership for Steve to drive tonight."

I was stunned by the amount of thought he'd put into this. "Wow, baby. This is…"

He shrugged modestly. "I wanted to be with you alone in some place other than your flat or my house."

I glanced around. "So what are we doing?"

"We are going on a very stereotypical date tonight. Dinner and a movie."

Dinner and a movie with Edward Masen sounded… unreal. Impossible.

He managed to prove me wrong.

He took me to a very crowded restaurant where we sat at a very public table and ate cheeseburgers and fries and drank pints of beer—at Edward's insistence—while everyone stared and snapped photos. Of course, we ignored them. We were trapped in our own little world, enjoying each other's company and the normality of the evening together. Not a single fan came up for an autograph, which I quickly learned was because Edward had promised to tip the wait staff handsomely if they kept everyone away from us tonight, but I didn't care. We were together doing something I'd dreamed about doing for as long as I'd know him.

It was fucking phenomenal.

The movie was great. The last time I'd seen any type of movie at all was during the time Edward was in Vancouver, and I couldn't get my dumb ass to get off the couch and stop watching The Hallmark Channel long enough to take a shower or change out of my pajamas before noon. It was funny as hell; there were plenty of times that Edward and I were both laughing so hard we could hardly breathe when he wasn't groping me during the more subdued scenes.

Cheap dinners, dark theaters, and hands secretly roaming in places they didn't belong with silent kisses being stolen throughout the film had me feeling more content and peaceful outside of the shelter of our own homes than I'd ever known possible. It was everything I'd missed as a teenager, and the handsome, older actor sitting next to me was allowing me to experience it all without the awkwardness of first dates and unrequited crushes.

His generosity was endless.

We strolled down the sidewalk after the movie, hand in hand, and I laid my head on his shoulder. "You knew I'd like that, didn't you?"

"I might've had some sort of inkling, yes."

I straightened up and tugged on his hand to stop his steps. "Thank you. It was everything I thought a first date should be but better, because I got to spend it with you."

"You're welcome. I thought you deserved a night like this after everything I've put you through."

"You've put me through nothing," I reminded him. "I did it all myself."

I twisted my fingers with his and stared down at them. They fit so perfectly together, impossibly so, reminding me of Edward and myself. We had similarities, but mainly, we were so totally different from one another it was sometimes hard to believe that we were made for each other.

But I knew with every ounce of my soul that we were.

"What are you thinking?" he breathed.

"I'm thinking that I can't wait to marry you. I can't wait until the day I marry the man who was made for me, as cheesy as that sounds."

His breath hitched and he pulled his hand from mine so that he could wind both in my hair. "Soon, love. As soon as possible, I'm flying you somewhere and making you mine."

"I already am yours," I whispered.

His brow furrowed as a low groan rumbled in his chest. He dipped down to kiss me, pulling me on my toes with his passion and not letting go until we were both breathless and dazed.

Shouts started getting louder as something grew closer to us. Edward looked over my shoulder, and his entire demeanor changed—tensing—as he realized we were no longer alone.

I craned my neck to stare at the crowd of photographers running toward us. "Now what?" I asked in defeat.

The tension left his body, replaced by a child-like excitement brightening his already piercing eyes. "Now… we run."


	26. Chapter 26

**Short and sweet....**

**Thanks for the reviews and adds, thanks to Stratan for beta'ing this. **

**Don't forget, readalong on Twitter is coming up. May 24th at 8:30EST. (at)JennyB0719. Hosting the readalong is (at)claireoth. **

* * *

Chapter 26

**Edward**

Bella giggled and squealed excitedly as we raced back to the car. I yanked my hand from hers and dug my keys out of my pocket so that I could hit the button on the remote and unlock it. There was really no explanation for my sudden need to run from the press other than the fact that everything on our date had been sublimely perfect, and I wasn't interested in having the paparazzi spoil it.

And that it sounded fun. The energy that Bella gave off was infectious; it was fantastic to be able to laugh whole-heartedly with someone who knew everything about me. It was exhilarating to throw caution to the wind and simply be myself instead of the polite, guarded womanizer the press saw me as.

I threw the door open and practically forced Bella inside so that I could make it around the car and into my own seat before they caught up with us. I could hear their questions getting closer and closer as they gained ground on me, but I studiously stared at my feet and ignored it, laughing the entire time.

I opened my door and was met with a frenzy of flashing lights. I sobered enough to speak. "Not tonight, gentlemen. My fiancée and I just finished doing a long interview with _People_, and we're all answered out."

Their moans of protest were cut off as soon as I shut the door and started the engine.

I looked to Bella. "Where to?"

"Back to the Bat Cave."

I chuckled some more. My place or yours?"

"I have some laundry I could do… But I'd rather just grab it and take it to your place. Your bed is so much more comfortable than mine."

I nodded and pulled away from the curb. "All right. You know, I like spending time at your flat, but I will be so glad when we don't have to decide where to stay each night."

"Well, we don't have to sleep together every night."

I gave her a hard look.

"Joke, Edward. Jeez. I like sleeping with you. In more ways than one." She grinned wickedly.

"Ah, good to know I'm doing well in that department," I replied with a sly wink.

She covered her laugh by throwing her hand over her mouth. "You are. _Trust_ me, you are."

I drove us to her flat, keeping close watch on the press following us to ensure that I didn't wreck with the numerous black vehicles tailing me. Now that it was no longer just myself to worry about, being tailed constantly was getting extremely old. I just wanted to be able to drive somewhere with Bella and not have to fear for her safety.

I was going to be an absolute wreck when we had children.

"I'm fucking hungry." Bella said randomly.

"Again? You just ate a cheeseburger and almost an entire plate of fries earlier!" I exclaimed in disbelief.

"Well, I'm hungry." She shrugged. "I don't know why, so don't ask."

"Are you, um, you know…" Why I couldn't get the words out was beyond me. They were so simple but seemed to stick to my throat.

"Am I what? Not pregnant, no."

"No, that's not what I was going to say." I shook my head in frustration with myself. "Hormones and such," I managed.

"Oh!" She beamed at me. "You're trying to figure out if it's that time of the month!"

I nodded and muttered something incoherent from my idiocy.

"You're so cute when you're embarrassed. It never happens." She reached over and cupped my face; her hand was so cool on my cheek, it only served to embarrass me further.

"I'm glad one of us is enjoying my discomfort," I retorted.

She pressed her lips together, trying not to laugh at me.

"Go on, laugh. I'm being absolutely absurd."

She nodded and burst into a fit of giggles, holding her sides as her body shook at my expense.

I parked the car and went to Bella's side so that I could keep a firm grasp of her around all these photographers. She'd done amazingly well in the last few days, acting as if they weren't really a bother, but it did nothing to satisfy the desire I had in me to keep her protected. After what happened with James, I didn't trust any of these blokes.

She fumbled with her keys for a moment before finally opening the door. She gave me a quick kiss and ran into her bedroom to gather her laundry up, leaving me alone with Rosalie and Emmett.

"Hello," I greeted them both. "How was your weekend?"

"Apart from being hung the fuck over on Saturday, it was all right," Rosalie responded. "How did Bella do with the photo shoot and interview?"

I smiled broadly, thinking of how magnificent she was during the photo shoot and how natural she was with Carmen. "Brilliant. She will always manage to surprise me."

Rosalie's eyebrow cocked, causing me to nearly cower against the door. It was such a simple movement that created such an enormous response. I had no idea how she did it. "You didn't think she would?"

"No, that's not what I meant. I merely-"

"Babe, leave him alone," Emmett interrupted. "You know we all wondered how Bella was going to do after that panic attack."

Rosalie sneered something under her breath, but I didn't pay attention to it because Emmett was staring at me as if he was trying to remember something but couldn't.

"What?" I demanded. "What is wrong with the bloody two of you tonight?"

"Relax, dude. I was just going to ask if I called you 'Eddie' Friday night."

"Oh." My brow furrowed, trying desperately to sort through the blur of memories. "I think you might've."

"Sorry," he said sheepishly. "I get excited when I drink. Edward is just so fucking formal…"

"It's fine," I replied flippantly. "I actually don't think it bothered me. But let's not make it a habit, shall we?"

Bella came out of the corridor with a large basket of clothes in her hands and her black duffle thrown carelessly over her shoulder. I rushed over to her and took the basket from her hands before snatching the strap of the bag and sliding it over my own shoulder, loving that I caused a relieved smile to cross her face as I did.

We ducked out of the building, narrowly missing the paparazzi that were still lingering in the parking lot and drove back to my house, grabbing her something to eat on the way there.

"What's the bag for?" I inquired as I helped her take everything inside.

"I thought I'd leave it here. It's stupid for me not to start making use of all that space you freed up for me."

The idea of Bella slowly migrating her belongings to my house had me grinning and walking with a bounce in my step as I greeted Samson and let him outside. I was such a love struck moron.

I gave Bella the bag and took the basket of clothes to the laundry room. I started sifting through the clothes, putting them in the drum of the washer along with some of my own items, when I heard Bella's scream.

I dropped everything I had in my hands and rushed into the bedroom to see her jumping around in the bathroom and cursing violently.

"What is wrong with you?" I asked in alarm.

"Your fucking dog shit in the bathroom! I stepped in it!" she shrieked.

"He _what_?" I shook my head obstinately. "That's impossible. He hasn't had an accident in the house since he was a puppy," I insisted.

She held up a tissue marred with brown. "Then what do you call this? Because I call it dog shit."

I walked over to the threshold and peered inside. Sure enough, a brown pile had been smeared across the marble floor.

"Erm, at least he did it in here and not on the carpet?" I said uncertainly.

She looked as if she was going to cry. "I'm going to take a shower and scrub my foot until it's raw. Got any bleach?"

"In the kitchen."

"Bring it to me," she instructed, hopping over to the shower. "I'm disinfecting myself. And you'd better do it to the floor, too."

My face turned down in a frown. "Of course."

What, did she think that I'd make _her_ clean it up?

"How did you miss it, anyway? It smells awful." I asked as I bent down to start cleaning the mess.

I was met with a glare. "I had the light off, Edward."

"You were in the bathroom with the light off?" I questioned her again, against my better judgment. She looked extremely angry.

"It was right inside. I turned to flip the switch and stepped right in it. Any more questions, Inspector Masen?" She did that brow thing that Rosalie had done earlier, but it didn't have the same effect. She just looked… cute.

I pursed my lips while I pondered that and flushed the offending material down the loo. "No."

I went to the kitchen and pulled the bleach out of the cupboard under the sink and turned to wipe down the disaster on the master bathroom floor. I saw Samson sitting outside the door, watching and waiting for me to let him in.

I cracked the door open. "You can stay out here tonight, you bloody prick. Your inability to control your bowels shocked the shit out of Bella when she stepped in it," I said sharply.

He groaned and placed his head on his large paws.

"Oh, no you don't," I laughed. "No amount of begging is going to get you out of this one, mate. You have some serious sucking up to do. And it isn't to me."

When we had ourselves and the floor both clean, we slipped into bed together, listening to the gentle flow of the classical music I had programmed to shuffle silently. As I held her in my arms, it occurred to me that today had been a turning point in our relationship. Bella stood by my side, mixing politeness and cautiousness with her own sense of humor, and was a natural in front of the camera. The change in her was astounding, and I found myself falling even more in love with the woman lying beside me.

She was my rib, my missing piece.

Her breathing was slow and easy—soothing—as she shifted in my arms. Her warmth filled the room, and her scent made my head spin. A sharp streak of desire went through me; I turned her and groaned as a wave of that incredible scent washed over me, enveloping me in her unintentional sensuality.

I wanted her—now—and so I shifted our bodies so that I was hovering over her and kissed her passionately.

I squeezed her arse with my hand just before I hitched her leg over my hip, and she became more and more needful with the way her hands traveled over my skin and gripped at my hair. Her nails dug into the skin of my neck, just under the collar of my shirt, and the little bit of control that I'd managed to keep hold of finally snapped.

Clothes flew and grunts and groans echoed around us as we worked our way to satisfaction. The remaining article of my clothing—my shirt—was now in her hands. I heard the sharp rip of the fabric tearing in her hands but was too far gone to care.

"I've wanted to do that all fucking day," she breathed against my mouth.

"Mmm," was all I could manage.

My lips moved down the graceful line of her neck, over her collarbone, longing to taste the sweet skin of her breasts and feel her nipples pebble against my mouth while my hands skimmed over her body, eliciting small gasps and arches of her back with every touch.

She moaned my name in an effort to speed my movements, but I was savoring her and the moment as a sort of celebration of the day. She'd done so much for me, to be with me, going out of her comfort zone and learning to adapt to the world I drug her into the day I said "I love you".

She gasped as my hand moved between her thighs, pushing her hips up against my movements. Each pass made her body writhe with anticipation, in a silent plea for me to push her over that illusive edge and into blissful oblivion.

I brought my body up over hers, aligning us together as I wrapped her legs around my waist and slowly pushed into her, merging our two bodies into one. Her soft moan of pleasure was like a siren's call as I delved into my own personal version of heaven, moved by the way her divine body felt around mine.

It may have seemed that I was in control, but the reality was that Isabella Swan was constantly in control of me. I circled round her like a satellite, fulfilling her every want and need. When she moved, I followed, tied by the invisible thread that bound me to her. Her heart pulled me to her in a way I'd never known possible.

I stared down at her and smiled, in awe of what she could do to me when we came together. I could see the line between her brows start to form, and her teeth scraped her bottom lip as she grew closer and closer to release.

Her hand came up to rest over my heart, and it was that moment I shattered. She was finally here with me in every way. Nothing hindered her love for me; nothing stopped us from moving forward together. Those words I'd said earlier to Bella—those words about marrying her soon—were truer than I'd known. A vision of Bella in white flitted through my mind, and a destination, a plan, formed.

A broken groan escaped my throat as she tightened her limbs around me. I could feel her nails scoring down my back as she tried to keep quiet and groaned as pleasure shot straight through me.

"Don't hold back, baby," I grunted through the sudden demand my body had to come. "I want to hear you come with me."

Her moans slowly filled my ears, becoming louder with each of my strokes. She squeezed her eyes closed, and I quickly demanded them open; I wanted to see every part of her when she came undone.

Her eyes latched on to mine, becoming depths of emotion and lust as she finally let go and climaxed. My own orgasm ripped through me, and my moan pierced the air as I held her against me and came inside her.

Her trembling hand came up to push the hair off my forehead. "What was that?" Her voice sounded amazing breathless like this. It managed to stir my blood all over again.

"I've no idea. You felt it?"

She nodded. "I thought I was going to cry."

I'd briefly wondered the same thing. My chest was still heavy with everything coursing through me.

We were sweaty; exhausted from the physical and emotional toll our lovemaking had taken on us, and were both nearly asleep when my mobile rang on the bedside table.

"Damn it," Bella whispered.

"I know." I kissed her temple chastely and rolled over to answer.

"YOU'RE ELOPING?" Alice screamed in my ear.

I groaned as my entire ear was racked with pain from her shrill voice. "My God, Alice, I've gone completely deaf on the left side now," I mumbled sleepily.

"Good! What are you two thinking? Do you know how upset everyone is going to be with you?"

"I take it you're one of those upset with us," I said dryly.

"Yes! Let me talk to Bella!" she demanded.

Bella shook her head forcefully, her heavy-lidded eyes widening with fear.

"I'm afraid Bella's not available at the moment. She's… in the shower," I said stiffly.

Bella rolled her eyes at my horrible attempt to lie. "You're an actor for God's sake. You can do better than that."

"It's my sister! I can't lie to her!" I hissed back.

"Whatever, Edward. I know you can't lie worth shit to me. I want to talk to her."

"Well, she doesn't want to talk to you. And neither do I unless you calm down," I countered.

She huffed out a breath. "Fine. I'm calm.I apologize for that. Caught me off guard and all. I got some crazy vision of the two of you in front of the Eiff-"

I cut her off. "Don't you dare finish that sentence, Alice." Alice's high-pitched voice had a horrible tendency to carry. I wasn't ready to tell anyone where I wanted to take Bella for our wedding. Not even Bella herself.

"Oh." Her tinkling laughter at herself made me smile. "I'm sorry, honestly. It just shocked the hell out of me."

"Yeah, I got that."

"Edward, Mum will be so disappointed."

"I know," I replied. "But this is what we want. We don't want to have to make everyone we speak to about it sign waiver after waiver and worry about the press showing up sometime in the middle of the event or-"

"Okay," she laughed. "I get it. And Mum will, too. But I really wish I could see my big brother's face when he gets married."

Those words made me feel incredibly guilty for not involving our families in the wedding, so I said the only thing I could. "I'm sorry."

She actually growled. "Don't apologize for trying to be happy. Anyway, I really do need to ask Bella something."

"Err…"

"Please? I'm not going to scream or yell. I simply want to ask her how the photo shoot went."

I knew that wasn't what she was going to ask, but I reluctantly passed Bella the phone and got up, throwing a pair of sweatpants on before getting into Bella's bag and putting her clothes away in an attempt to distract myself from their conversation; it didn't work. I found myself trying to decipher their cryptic words even though I looked like I wasn't paying a bit of attention.

And failing.

"Edward, Alice says for you to stop eavesdropping," Bella giggled.

"It's my wedding, also." God, I sounded like a whiny child.

"Yeah, but this doesn't concern you, so stop being such a pain in my ass." She stuck her tongue out at me, making me roll my eyes.

"Fine," I relented.

I went to hang a couple of things up and saw her eyes flicker over to me. "Yeah, probably."

She listened for a moment. "No, don't tell me any details, just tell me how to make that happen on such short notice, please," she asked sweetly.

It was infuriating to be blatantly disregarded like this.

She scrunched her entire face up with disgust. "Zafrina? No, I don't fucking think so," she bit out.

I sighed. I was being so unfair to her about the situation. Bella believed Zafrina loved me, and so would I. It was as simple as that. For me to try to push past the situation was not going to work.

I just needed to figure out how to broach the subject with Zafrina without sounding like a complete arse. She needed to know that her mistake was unforgivable and that if one small negative detail of Bella's life was published in any magazine or mentioned on any blog or television show, I wouldn't hesitate to find another publicist.

There was also the issue of Bella's comfort; there was no denying the awkwardness that she was sure to feel when dealing with Zafrina. She needed to be at ease with everyone who worked for me. It was something I needed to discuss with her before speaking with Zafrina since Bella's feelings were far more important than my own desire to stay neutral and keep both relationships intact.

If I needed to hire a new publicist without giving Zafrina a second chance, then so be it.

Bella made a few noncommittal noises and reached out to grab a pen and pad of paper, scribbling something down quickly and nodding to herself.

"Got it." She grinned. "Love you. Bye."

She held the mobile out to me. "There you go."

I took it and threw it back on the table. "I'm going to shower now," I told her, not bothering to hide my annoyance.

"Oh, don't be mad." She walked over to me and ran her hands over my chest. "It's a surprise for you," she said softly. "A really good one."

My lips curved as my anger dissolved with just her touch. "It is?"

She nodded and bit down on her lip. "Mm-hmm. So stop being so stupid about it."

"I'm not usually on the receiving end of a surprise."

She grinned mischievously. "I know. That's what will make this so good."

I scowled. "I shouldn't have acted like that."

"Nope." She grabbed my face and pulled my mouth to hers. "Come here, you cranky old man," she murmured, getting that dark look in her eyes that I loved so much.

My laugh was stopped by her deep kiss. She moved her hands down my body, bringing me as close to her as she could get me. Her hands fisted at my back and then slid down to my waist, toying with my sweats before plunging them down to where every drop of my blood was now centered again.

The air seemed to leave my lungs as she wrapped her soft, delicate hand around me, and I groaned and started walking her back to the bed.

"_You_ are hiding something from me," she said knowingly.

"I am. I think you'll love it, though. Trust me?"

She nodded. "Implicitly."

"Good, then I suppose I should tell you now that we're getting married in Paris before my sister ruins it for me."

She blinked rapidly, and then a gorgeous smile lit up her entire face; it was without a doubt worth spoiling the surprise to see that reaction from her. "Paris?" she giggled.

I nodded and searched her face. "Paris. Is that all right?"

"It's… perfect," she sighed dreamily. "Thank you."

* * *

**Bella**

I shuffled out of the bedroom sleepily and threw my hair in a messy knot as I made my way to the kitchen. My destination was coffee. Lots of coffee. I couldn't even begin to function this morning without it thanks to Edward's and my libidos. We'd stayed up practically all night long worshiping each other, taking pleasure in the fact that I'd basically gotten my shit together and was finally ready to be the girl Edward needed me to be—the one who would stand beside him and embrace the madness surrounding us. Or ignore it. Both seemed to work just fine. Either way, I wasn't a panicky disaster like I was before. It didn't mean that I liked it—far from it—but I'd finally learned to control that urge to run and just be myself in front of the cameras.

Any other man would have said "I told you so" or gotten sick of my stupidity, but not Edward. He knew I had to come to terms with all of this on my own and left me to do it without any added pressure; he stood with me and comforted me when I needed it and was literally my rock. Without him, I'd have never gotten through it.

Now, we were planning some semblance of a wedding—in Paris, for that matter. I'd never been away from the west coast, much less out of the country. Today I was applying for a passport, paying the expedited fee so that it would be here sooner because neither Edward nor I seemed to be able to wait much longer. I actually wanted to wear his ring and call him my husband; it was such a huge change from the way I felt when I met him. It made me wonder how it was possible that one man could have the power to alter someone so completely.

The term "elopement" was being used loosely by us. Because of Edward's popularity, we had to plan this together in secret down to the last detail. When we were finally certain that our plans wouldn't be spoiled by the paparazzi, we would buy our plane tickets and pick up and leave.

I was grateful that Alice had called Edward after her "vision" last night. She was the one who came up with a way for me to get a leave from class without causing any suspicion. It also gave me the way to pay Edward back for every act of kindness and love he'd shown me in the last couple of months while he waited for me to grow up.

I couldn't wait to see his face when I surprised him in Paris.

I made myself some of the coffee Edward had already taken a cup from and sighed as the hot liquid hit my throat, listening to the strangely soothing sound of his feet hitting the treadmill. It was the repetition I found so comforting, the knowledge that he was always here.

A loud knock on the front door startled me. I glanced around, ridiculously searching for Edward even though I knew he was downstairs, oblivious to someone getting past the gate and to the house.

I groaned with irritation and went to answer the door. I threw it open and nearly groaned again. Zafrina was standing on the porch looking as perfect as ever. Perfect, sleek hair and perfect, dewy skin topped off with a perfect, white chiffon blouse and a perfect, tan leather mini skirt.

Her shoes were even perfect.

Fuck.

"You have the code," I said flatly.

"I have the code. Can I come in?" She raised her eyebrows and looked past me into the foyer. "Where's Edward?"

"Downstairs working out." Of course, you idiot.

"Oh." She flashed a sugary smile and walked past me. Her little leather boots clicked on the floor loudly. "That's okay; I needed to speak with you for a minute, anyway."

"Uh-huh." I shut the door and crossed my arms over my chest. "I don't have anything to talk to you about. I don't _want_ to talk to you. Shouting, though, I might be able to handle."

"I deserve that. Letting that article be published was poor judgment on my part."

I laughed dryly. "No shit?"

She ignored my sarcasm. "I wanted to apologize to both you and Edward."

"You could've called."

"Well," she said as she brushed past me and into the living room, "I thought it would be better to do it in person. And there's also some news I wanted to share with the both of you."

She sat down on the couch like she owned the place. I immediately bristled and could no longer hold my tongue. "Look, Zafrina, I know it's Edward you're after. He's no longer single, and you've lost that dream of yours you've kept secret for God only knows how long. But what I don't understand is why the fuck you'd let anyone talk about me the way you did. It reflects badly on Edward, and until now, his record has been squeaky clean. Clean breaks from all the women he's supposedly dated, and he's never had drug or alcohol issues or anything else you find common in Hollywood."

"With exception of Tanya," she pointed out.

"With the exception of crazy Tanya. So am I right or not?" I stood my ground, waiting patiently for her answer.

"Like I said, poor judgment on my part. I'm sorry," she said, looking everywhere but where I was standing.

A sudden realization hit me. "That is such bullshit. You thought that if I got a ton of bad press, he'd distance himself from me. You didn't consider that Edward loves me, regardless of how short a time we've actually been together. What was your plan? Were you going to swoop in and comfort him, and then try to take my place?"

She said nothing, and I never got a chance to press the subject because Edward chose that moment to come back upstairs. He stopped, wiping his brow with a towel, and looked at Zafrina in confusion. Her face lit up with her greeting, beaming at the mere sight of him, and I could feel my entire demeanor tighten and tense with anger.

"Z," he said in surprise. "What can I do for you at…?" His eyes darted to the clock. "Seven forty in the morning?"

"I was hoping I could maybe… give Bella an apology for not stopping that article." She forced an awkward laugh.

That line formed between his brows as his mood shifted. "And did you?"

"Yes, but I wanted to apologize to you, too." She was so fucking earnest with this shit now that Edward was around. "And thank you for not firing me."

"He should have," I muttered under my breath, not listening to whatever answer Edward had for her.

At least, I thought it had been under my breath.

Edward's piercing gaze met mine, and he crossed the room and snaked his arm around my waist, yanking me to him. Heat rolled off him in waves, and I couldn't tell if it was from anger or the after effects of his workout. Regardless, it had my hormones firing on all cylinders.

He bent down so that his mouth was hovering at my ear. His hot breath caused a shiver to rip down my spine. "Look, she's a friend; I gave her another shot. I've already decided that if she makes another mistake, even something small, she's gone. Does that make you happy?"

I stared back at him defiantly, pissed off that he was taking _her_ mistake out on me. I understood his reasoning for not firing her; it was typical Edward behavior to think a decision this big through before finally doing something. It was also in his nature to be so forgiving, even though most people would have already found someone else to take care of all their PR bullshit. But in a way, I felt like he was choosing her over me.

Probably stupid and irrational, but there you go.

"Does it make _you_ happy?" I countered softly, losing my defiance as I looked into his angered face. I didn't like this feeling that came with arguing with him. It was an unfamiliar tightening in my chest that I just wanted to disappear. At this point, I'd agree to anything to rid myself of it.

Another thing that pissed me off.

"What would make me happy is if this entire thing had never happened." His face softened considerably as he moved a piece of hair from my eyes. "Let's not argue, love."

"I don't want to argue with you," I whispered. "It's your decision. I'll stay out of it. But please, take my feelings into consideration?" I amazingly managed to ask the question without sounding like I was begging.

"I always will," he promised. "You're more important to me than anyone else. Don't forget that, Bella. I've had the same team working for me for so long, it would almost be a hardship to change everything with only one picture left to film before I retire. But I'll change it if I need to."

"You will?"

"Of course." He got a little smirk on his face. "However, I've already changed my agent and my life for you; I'm not sure what else you could want."

I hugged him against me, vowing to think about his offer to change publicists later. "Nothing."

"You look quite fetching this morning with your hair all piled up on top of your head and your tiny little shorts."

I laughed at the crooked smile that had formed on his lips. "Flattery will only get you so far, Mr. Masen."

"Back to bed?"

"I'm exhausted enough as it is after all that sex last night." I grinned up at him.

"Ah, so the key to Bella silence is lots of sex? I'll keep that in mind for nights you're extremely chatty, and I'm desperate for you to shut up," he said playfully.

"Jerk."

"I don't think so." He kissed my temple and then released me. "I'm sorry, I'm all sweaty."

I reached out for him. "I don't care. I like you all sweaty."

He gave me an incredulous look and let me weasel my way back into his arms. "You're an awfully strange one, Miss Swan. Most women would be hissing at me for touching them before taking a shower."

"I'm not most women."

He laughed once and nuzzled my nose with his. "Thank God for that."

Zafrina cleared her throat loudly. We both turned back to her with completely different expressions. Edward's was apologetic; mine was smug. Edward had completely forgotten she was here.

Good. Let her see that her place in his life is only as his employee and nothing more. Maybe that would stop the delusions she currently suffered from.

"So, um…" She struggled for her composure, and my smugness evaporated. I actually felt sorry for her, for someone that had to resort to making me look bad in hopes of finally gaining Edward's attention. She had to be miserable sitting there watching our little display of vomit-inducing cuteness.

"I have the name of the anonymous source if you want it."

"Who?" I shrieked instantly, flaming up as soon as the word had been spoken.

"Someone's a bit eager," Edward murmured.

"Aren't you? Don't you want to know who said all that shit?"

His face darkened. "You've no idea how much I want to find out who it was and make them pay for what they did to you."

I blinked. Vengeance was hot on Edward.

"Anyway, Bella, I think you know him. Tyler Crowley?"

Edward's sharp intake of air matched mine. I stared at him, wide eyed and shocked, unable to grasp that Tyler had been the one to do the interview. He was at times stupid, but he was never a dick. This just seemed so… uncharacteristic of him.

Although, maybe I never really knew him at all. I mean, how much can you find out about a person you only dated for a few months?

I glanced at Edward's murderous expression and answered that question on my own. I knew almost everything there was to know—instinctively—about Edward in the few weeks I'd known him.

"I'll fucking kill him," Edward seethed, gripping on to me tightly.

"Easy there, Punisher. _I'll _talk to him. You're going nowhere near him like this."

Edward stared at me for a moment, lost in his anger, and then nodded tightly. "All right."

"Um, if I may?" Zafrina interrupted. "I think you should let your lawyers handle it."

"No, I know this guy. He's not spiteful or vindictive in any way. He's… Well, there's got to be a reason for him to do this. He wouldn't voluntarily do something like this on his own."

"You're sure about this?" Edward asked lowly.

I nodded. "Positive. I think if I just ask him and threaten suit, he'll cave and tell me exactly why he gave that interview. I don't want to sue him for no reason, baby."

Edward took a deep breath to collect himself and then turned back to Zafrina. "I'm contacting my lawyers to go ahead with the suit on the magazine itself. I want them to retract the story as soon as humanly possible. Bella's reputation deserves to be put back to the way it was before. Clean."

She nodded. "Well, I'll let the two of you figure out what to do about Mr. Crowley on your own. I'll make up a statement to publish in next week's magazines for anyone who might've missed Bella's tell-all on Friday," she said bitterly.

Anger suddenly shot through me again. Any sympathy I might've had for her a second ago was now gone. "Now, wait a minute-"

I was interrupted by Edward's angry snarl. "Zafrina, Bella talked to me about announcing our engagement early, and I agree with her reasoning why. I'm just as guilty as she is."

I gaped in shock. He'd never given me any reason to think he agreed with me that night, just surrendered the task to me since I was so adamant about it.

"I realize the two of you don't get along, and I'm not insisting you do, however, you need to watch how to you speak to her in my presence because my loyalty will always lie with Bella."

"What am I doing here then?" she demanded, standing up. "If you're not going to take my advice and let Bella call all the shots, why am I still here?"

"You're here because I have a heart and didn't fire you the second I started reading that headline. You did nothing to keep Bella's name from being tarnished, and by association, my name—which is your job, after all—so why should she do as you instructed? For all she knew, you were trying to sabotage her for your own personal gain."

I was pretty sure my mouth dropped open even wider. He _believed_ me.

She sputtered and stammered over an answer, all while her eyes filled with tears. She blinked them back and then finally regained her speech. "That wasn't my intention. Like I said, I apologize for that. I thought if we had something out there to distract from the Tanya debacle, we could brush it off and make it like it never happened. The readers would then see the press for your upcoming film and hopefully become interested in that instead. I was trying to salvage your reputation."

"At my expense?" I asked.

Her spine straightened. "No."

I didn't believe it for a minute.

Edward ran a hand through his hair, sending it everywhere. "Just fix it, Z. I don't want to hear from you again until you have."

He laid his forehead on mine, breathing in deeply and then gave me a quick kiss before moving away. "I'm going to shower now. Show Zafrina out?"

I didn't want to, but I knew he needed a minute to get himself together before he said something he regretted, so I simply nodded.

I walked her to the door and opened it, fully expecting her to walk outside and leave without a word, but she stopped at the threshold and turned back to me nervously.

"I'm sorry, Bella. Honestly."

I stared back at her and saw her sincerity. "Okay."

"You're good for him."

"Yep," I answered, ignoring the lie.

"No, I mean it. I got the transcript of the interview this morning. You two are…" She looked around, searching for her words. "Meant. You complement each other."

"I know."

She took a deep breath of resolution. "I won't try to interfere again. Edward made sure I know my place this morning. I'm not one to repeat my mistakes."

"Okay," I repeated.

"But I need his friendship, as crazy as that sounds."

"You mean you want his love," I stated, leaning against the door.

"You can't have something that doesn't belong to you, Bella, no matter how much you want it." She started toward the steps. "Between the lawyers and me, this story will be dust before you know it."

"Thank you," I blurted out, silently cursing myself for being so nice to this damn woman.

She nodded and gave me a small smile. "You're welcome. I'm your publicist, too, Bella. If you need something, call."

"Are you fucking serious? It's over… like that?" I snapped my fingers. "How do I know you won't try something like this again?"

"What would I do? He doesn't love me; he loves you. Nothing I do can change that. I know Edward well enough to know when he has his mind set on something. He's set on you. I'll get over it." She smiled sadly and walked away.

I shut the door and laid my forehead on the cool glass, wondering how long it took for someone to get over something you'd felt for so long and if I could really trust what she'd said. I glanced back up and saw her sitting in her car wiping the tears from her eyes and knew she had given up any hope of ever being something more than Edward's publicist and friend.

I was suddenly furious with Edward for giving her any reason to think that she had a chance with him and never seeing how much she cared for him, outside of their professional relationship. I was furious with myself for feeling sorry for this woman. I couldn't understand why I had all this compassion for a woman who'd tried to wreck my relationship with Edward by standing aside and not doing her job to defend either of us. I should feel safe and secure in my relationship again now that she was no longer a threat—and I did, somewhere—but mainly, I felt horrible that I'd just walked into his life and found a place in his heart without even trying, while Zafrina was fervently wishing that he would finally see her.

What the fuck was wrong with me?

Edward's strong hand gripped my shoulder, causing me to jump in place. "Shit, you scared me!"

A wry smile quirked his lips. "Sorry."

"How long have you been standing there?"

"Long enough to know that I was right to believe you." He shrugged. "I may have gone about it wrong, but I realized Friday how incredibly perceptive you are. I was simply burying my head in the sand and trying to ignore the situation. Or maybe just trying to keep everyone happy simultaneously."

"Like an ostrich?"

He chuckled and pulled me against him, resting his chin on the top of my head. "If it's uncomfortable and you want me to search for a new publicist, I will," he said again.

"No. I don't think that's necessary."

"No?" He backed away and looked at me seriously. "You're sure?"

"I'm sure. I think she figured out that nothing she did would make you leave me."

"Nothing," he promised.

"You're an asshole, though."

His eyes widened. "What did I do?"

"You were oblivious to the whole thing for how many years now? It was unfair to her for me to just walk in here and take over everything when she probably thought she had a chance with you. Because you never gave her a reason to think otherwise!" I raved.

"You're taking up for her?" he asked in shock.

"Well, yeah. She looked so heartbroken, Edward." I glanced back toward the empty place in the driveway where her car had been sitting.

"I feel horrible, Bella, really. I never realized that she felt that way about me."

"How is that possible?"

"She hid it well, as much as you probably doubt that," he replied.

"Oh."

"Besides, there's no spark, no connection, like I have with you."

I gazed up at him hopefully. "No?"

"No, love," he chuckled, cradling my face in his hands. "Your touch gives me a rush and your laughter makes me feel alive. Your love freed me in a way I never knew possible. I could never go back to the way I was before."

I pulled him down and kissed him as forcefully as I could, unable to convey how his words made me feel in any other way. I just didn't have the eloquence he did.

"Shower with me?" he asked with a grin.

"Edward," I groaned.

"I'll be on my best behavior. Scout's honor." He held up his fingers.

I rolled my eyes. "Do you even have Boy Scouts in England?"

"Of course we do."

"But you weren't one, were you?"

He grinned widely. "I think the sentiment is still the same, don't you?"

I grinned back. "We'll see."

* * *

The drive to school was long. Between Zafrina and Tyler, my head was spinning with everything that had happened in the two hours since I'd awoken. It was_ not_ how I'd planned to start my day. I just wanted to turn back the clock and curl up in bed with Edward and be blissfully unaware of all the shit that was waiting for me.

I pulled into the parking lot and waited for Emmett to come over to the car before getting out and walking past the crowd of photographers surrounding us. I waved, I smiled, I answered a few inconsequential questions—doing my duty—but really, I was anxiously waiting for the second that I could start looking for Tyler fucking Crowley.

Because I was going to kill him when I found him.

I'd gotten past the initial shock, and now I was just furious. I wanted to hurt him like he'd hurt me, make him pay for everything I felt the day that article came out, but I knew I couldn't. Not only was I watched constantly, I was trying so hard to be good for Edward.

That included sucking it up and being rational so that I didn't embarrass him when a video of me kicking Tyler's ass was leaked all over the internet.

It really sucked being involved with such a prominent man sometimes.

I left Emmett as soon as I walked on campus and debated on finding Tyler instead of going to class, but I decided that I needed the extra time to figure out what I was going to say. At the moment, only the hurling of insults came to mind—not exactly productive.

I went through the motions of my day, but my heart just wasn't in it like it usually was. I didn't care about the writing assignment I'd aced, I didn't care about meeting with Rosalie for lunch, and I certainly didn't care about meeting with my counselor to start filling out applications for graduate programs all over the country… and England.

Everything that normally gave me pleasure when I was away from Edward did nothing to lift my spirits.

So of course today would be the day that Mike Newton came running up to me after my final class.

"Bella!" he shouted from behind me.

I spun around and suppressed my third groan of the day. "Yeah?"

"How are you?" He was so cheerful, I wanted to punch him in his face.

"Fine. You?"

"Great. So… you and Masen, huh?"

I nodded. "Yep."

"I kind of figured," he replied cockily.

"You what?"

"That night at Area. The chemistry between you two… Wow!"

"Uh, right," I replied awkwardly.

"He's not as much as an arrogant asshole as he seems, is he?" he question.

"What the hell?" I shouted.

"Too forward?"

"Uh, yeah, considering I know nothing about you except that you like the color pink, and you're some kind of engineering major."

_Freak._

He laughed. "Listen, I need a favor."

I glared at him. "After calling my fiancé an arrogant asshole, I'd say you have got some serious balls there, Mikey."

He continued as if I hadn't spoken. "My sister is a freshman and taking that prerequisite English course and needs some… help," he said delicately.

"A tutor?"

He grinned excitedly. "Yeah."

"No."

I turned and walked away.

He raced after me. "Oh, come on, Bella! Emmett said you were a whiz with grammar and whatever else. Please?"

I shook my head stubbornly. "I don't care what Emmett said. I have a lot going on right now, and I'm not interested in tutoring someone."

"Please? I'm begging you. I'd even pay you."

"I don't want your money, Mike."

"Oh, right, I guess with Masen being a billionaire you wouldn't need my money," he replied before becoming suddenly inspired. "Then do it out of the goodness of your heart."

Call it a moment of weakness or whatever you want, but I just wanted him to leave me alone. "Have her call me. I can do it on Mondays and Wednesdays only. If that doesn't work, she'll have to find someone else."

He beamed and kissed my cheek. "Thanks, Bella."

I wiped off my cheek in disgust. "Gross."

I shook off my annoyance and scanned the courtyard for the black haired, dark complexioned boy I'd once been so familiar with. I spotted him with his group of friends, sitting down on one of the benches with some ditzy looking blond in his lap.

He laughed and started openly groping the girl in front of everyone, and I was instantly mortified that I'd ever associated with him. It was all sorts of wrong, belonging nowhere in public view except for maybe in the back room of a strip club.

A dirty one at that.

I took a deep breath and strode determinately over to him, disregarding the stares of the people surrounding me as hit him on the shoulder to get his attention. Hard.

"What, God damn it?" he snapped.

I put my hands on my hips and started tapping my foot impatiently. "Hi, Tyler. Got a minute?"

He cleared his throat and murmured to the girl to get off him. She threw me a dirty look, and I laughed.

"I'll give him right back, I promise."

He stood up and walked me to a nearby tree, far enough that no one could hear us.

"What's up, Bella?"

"You know what's up. What the fuck is wrong with you?" I demanded.

"Uh…"

"'Uh'? That's it? You tell some journalist all sorts of untrue things about me, and all you can say for yourself is 'uh'?"

His mouth popped open audibly. "How did you find out?"

"Does it matter?" I arched my brow at him.

"No," he replied meekly. "Listen, Bella, I'm so sorry. I had to."

"Why? What could possibly be a decent enough reason for you to do that to me? To Edward? You don't even _know_ Edward!" I was on the verge of shrieking, so I took a deep breath to try to settle myself.

He took in a shuddering breath; I immediately stopped with the bitchiness and became concerned. "My mom's sick. She needs treatment that the insurance won't cover, and I thought if I sold some story to the press, I could get some money."

"Tyler…" I said softly. I was at a loss for words. I'd never met his mother, but suddenly my problems seemed so unimportant and stupid. "I'm sorry."

"Yeah."

"Did you get the money?" I inquired.

He nodded. "She starts treatment on the fifteenth." He stared down at his shuffling feet.

"You okay?"

"I will be. I just… My dad actually cried, Bella. In twenty-one years, and I've never known my father to cry and he broke down the second he got home with her. I had to do something."

"You know, Edward and I planned to sue the anonymous source."

His eyes bulged. "You can't. I'll do anything, Bella. Just please, don't," he pleaded.

I exhaled sharply, irritated with myself for being so damn nice today. Between basically forgiving Zafrina and allowing her to stay on as Edward's publicist and now doing the same thing with Tyler, I was turning into a softie. Edward was rubbing off on me.

But I knew I'd be even more upset with myself if I was a cold-hearted bitch to Tyler and sued him anyway.

"I'm not. We're suing the magazine and demanding a retraction on the story. I'll leave you out of it. After all, you're supposed to be anonymous."

He shifted on his feet and stared at me curiously. "Why are you being so nice?"

"Because I'm happy, Tyler. Happy people don't make other people miserable," I sighed.

"Yeah, I guess I should say 'congrats' or something."

"Thanks."

"Edward Masen, huh? How the hell did that one happen?"

"What is it with everyone asking me that today? Are you trying to say I'm not good enough for him?" I asked with a laugh.

"No, you are. But you know, he's a movie star… you're a college student. It seems unlikely." He shrugged.

"It works. I don't know why, but it does."

I stood there and talked to Tyler about his mom for a few more minutes before texting Emmett and telling him to meet me at the parking lot. I silently walked with Emmett to my car, not really in the mood for idle conversation or any of the photographers waiting for me, and waved goodbye to him before I hopped in the car.

I felt so shallow now. My problems with the press seemed enormous to me a week ago and now, it all seemed so petty. I wasn't at risk of losing a family member like Tyler was. Nothing significant would come from my inability to cope with the life I'd _chosen_ for myself.

And that was the problem. I'd chosen this life. I'd chosen Edward, and instead of letting myself become saturated in the love he religiously gave me, I got hung up on all the details surrounding us; details that didn't matter because really, they didn't have any effect on us at all. Nothing anyone did or said bothered us when we were together, because it wasn't real. I finally understood what Edward had been saying for so long. They weren't interested in us, as people, they were interested in the image we portrayed together. The vision of someone ordinary walking into a room and finding themselves the object of the most beautiful man in the world's affections. And while it was true, it had nothing to do with our relationship. It just happened to be the circumstances we'd met under. Any other scenario would have the same result; if he'd been a homeless man sitting on the side of the street, I'd have still gravitated toward him. I'd have still fallen in love with him because he was meant for _me_.

I shuffled into Edward's kitchen and pushed Samson away with my foot. "Go away. I can't deal with you today."

I went straight for Edward's bedroom and flopped down on my back, losing myself in the blankness of the ceiling above me.

"Bella?" Edward stopped texting on the Blackberry and looked at me anxiously. "Are you all right?"

"I'm such a fucking bitch," I mumbled.

His brows knit as he walked over to me. "You're not," he protested, taking my hand.

"Yes, I am."

He sat next to me and played with my ring. "Why's that, exactly?"

"Tyler's mom is sick. It's why he gave the bullshit story. For money."

"I see." He paused. "Why does this make you a bitch? Did you decide to sue him anyway? Run over his cat to complete his dreadful week?"

"No," I laughed.

"Then what could possibly make you think you're a bitch?"

"He's got serious problems, and here I was, worried about the fucking press. I've been so stupid about it," I responded, biting down on my trembling lip. "I was such a bitch to you about everything. You didn't deserve any of it."

"Bella, we all have our problems, big and small. Don't berate yourself because you don't think your problems are as serious as Tyler's, love. You made it through your issues. That's all that matters."

I nodded and wiped at the tear that fell down my cheek. "Between Tyler and Zafrina, I'm all out of forgiveness. I'll have to come back to it tomorrow."

He flashed a warm smile. "Your heart just gets bigger every day."

"Shut up," I grumbled.

"Very well, would you like to know that I've just spoken to my lawyer and the magazine will be printing a retraction in their next issue? They also would like us to give them a few little details and quotes to let their readers know the real story behind our meeting."

I threw my arm around him and buried my face against his thigh. "Thank God," I breathed in relief.

"Silver lining to your time of woe?" he chuckled.

"Yeah, something like that."

"Come on, enough of the pity party. I think an evening in the Jacuzzi with a bottle of wine and a few good books to read in are in order."

I stared at him in disbelief.

"I think I might have some chocolate left over from Christmas around here somewhere," he muttered to himself.

"Seriously?"

He grinned crookedly. "Isn't that what you chicks do when you're hormonal or sad?"

I giggled. "Yeah, I guess we do."


	27. Chapter 27

**Early update! The Twitter readalong claireoth is hosting is Monday at 8:30EST and my goal is to have chapter 28 posted sometime that day for everyone. I'm hoping it will make reading this fic worth while.**

**For details and a list of fics scheduled for upcoming readalongs go to www(dot)theficbridge(dot)blogspot(dot)com. **

**Thanks for the reviews and adds. Thanks for everyone's kind words and overwhelming approval of these two little characters I dreamed up one night. I may not get to respond to simple reviews, but I read them all. Just know they are what keep me writing, getting that instant gratification after I publish something (because I am a total, insecure nutcase at times--if you don't already know). *tear***

**OK, sappiness aside, thanks to Stratan for getting this to me in I think an hour and for most likely jinxing my "zoneage" by telling me he's looking forward to the next chapter. Jackass ;)**

* * *

Chapter 27

**Bella**

"Mmm," I sighed as I buried my face against Edward's neck. "I needed that."

He chuckled in my ear and held me tighter against him. Water sloshed between our naked bodies and the light of the Jacuzzi flickered with its waves. "Glad to be of service."

I sat up and narrowed my eyes at him. "You got me drunk on purpose."

"You looked rather… pitiful earlier in the bedroom. I thought a bottle of wine could do you some good."

"But you hardly drank anything."

He scrunched his face up. "God, no. I didn't like the feeling the other night."

I rolled my eyes. "Whatever."

"Let me rephrase that. I liked the feeling while I was pissed, but trying to recall what was said and done was frustrating and honestly, a little frightening. And at my age, I could stand to preserve every brain and liver cell I have left in my body. Especially now that I have someone so much younger to live for."

I laughed and pressed my lips to his before getting off his lap. I fumbled for my bikini and dipped it in the hot, rolling water before I put it back on my body. When I finally had it back on properly—which took quite a bit of work—I reached out and grabbed another piece of chocolate from the tin and moaned as the creamy, dark morsel melted on my tongue.

I saw Edward's look of displeasure and splashed water in his face. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

He blinked the water away and grinned. "You didn't have to get dressed, you know. It's quite enjoyable to watch your naked body move and bend under the water."

My face reddened. "Sorry."

"I think you like the chocolate more than me," he said lightly

I scoffed loudly. "No way. Chocolate might give me pleasure, but it doesn't give me one of those mind-bending orgasms like you just did. Or make me feel as wanted and happy as you can. Stop being such a dummy."

"All right. No more moronic comments."

I laid my head back against the headrest and closed my eyes. The air was cool against my flushed cheeks and the world spun pleasantly. I wasn't sure why I always got so angry when I drank; it was nice to just relax and let the sluggishness spread over my body and cycle through my blood.

"I'm going to look into Tyler's story," Edward said causally, as if there was nothing serious about his statement at all.

I opened one eye and peered over at him. "Why?"

"Just a precaution. You believe him, and I trust your judgment, however, it would be nice to have some sort of confirmation that his story about his mother is in fact true," he explained.

I opened my other eye and just stared at him, wondering where this sudden mistrust of everyone came from.

He continued, knowing exactly what was circling my mind. "I've become cynical in my old age. I've seen too many people in this industry use others for their own benefit and lie, cheat, and steal—not to mention perform the odd sexual favor—to get ahead. I want verification that his mother is ill. That's all."

"Fine. You having that private investigator guy dig into it?"

"Sam Uley, love," he corrected with a smile. "And yes, I am. How did you know about him?"

"I saw his card sitting on your desk. Why do you need it?" I leaned back again and stared into the blank, dark purple sky. "I want to see stars wherever we move to. It's too fucking hazy in this town to see any stars," I blurted.

"All right," he chuckled. "You want stars, you'll get stars."

"The Uley guy?" I prompted.

"He's a friend of Jasper's."

I knew that wasn't it. "And? Do I have to pry it out of you, Edward?"

He huffed. "No, of course not. I just don't want you to be alarmed, that's all."

"Why would I be alarmed?"

"I hired him to look into James Eliot. I want to know how long he's been watching us and what his motivations were for going into that fitting room and spying on my half naked fiancée," he said tersely.

I digested that for a minute. "What are you going to do with the information you get?" I asked, sitting back up and wringing the water from my hair. "I need to get my hair cut."

Edward laughed. "You're incredibly random when you drink, love."

My bottom lip jutted out. "Oh. Is it annoying?"

"Not at all. Quite entertaining, actually."

I grinned widely. "Kay."

"But don't cut your hair. I like the way it falls over your shoulders more now."

"You like it long?"

"Not necessarily long. I like it as it is. But it's your hair, do what you want with it."

"Well, I would say the same thing about your hair, but I don't want you to cut it. Ever."

He chuckled again. Apparently I was very amusing to sober Edward. "You'll have no say this November."

"What?" I shouted, a little louder than I'd intended.

"They'll buzz it off in the middle of filming. You know this," he replied.

But I'd completely forgotten. "Oh, all that hair," I pouted. "All that shiny, coppery colored hair."

"It grows back," he said simply.

"So?" I paused, realizing we'd deviated for the conversation. "Hey," I snapped indignantly. "Don't change the fucking subject. I asked you a question, and you evaded it completely. I don't appreciate being treated like one of those little weasels with cameras that are constantly following us around."

He grinned crookedly and swiped a stray hair away from his forehead. "There's that bitchy girl I know and love."

I crossed my arms over my chest and glowered at him.

"All right, all right. You asked a question, and here's the answer. I don't know what I plan to do with the information. Keep it handy in case he does something else, and I want to press charges against him, I suppose. His actions were borderline stalker behavior, and if he shows his face near you again, I want to have tangible proof that he has an unhealthy obsession with you. I'm trying to be proactive about the situation so that you aren't hurt, Bella. I don't think I could forgive myself if I didn't do everything in my power to protect you without going overboard. It's why you only have Emmett as your bodyguard. I could've hired an entire fleet of men who do this sort of thing for a living, but I didn't because I want to keep your life as normal as possible. You've already had to change so much to be with me; I can't ask for you to do any more."

I closed the distance between us and took his tortured looking face in my hands. "I love you. Thank you for thinking of what will make me happy no matter what you do."

"You are the only thing that matters to me anymore," he said simply.

I glanced down at my hands and giggled. "I'm all pruney."

"Then let's go in."

We wrapped ourselves in towels and picked up everything around the Jacuzzi before coming back out and turning it off and throwing the cover back over it.

Once we'd rinsed the chlorine off our bodies, we practically fell into bed. I laid my head down on the pillow and felt that lethargy of the alcohol overtaking me, causing me to nearly pass out.

I closed my eyes and felt Edward move around on the bed, plugging in cell phones and setting alarms and finally turning off the light.

I could still feel his gaze on me.

"Why are you staring at me?" I asked with a giggle.

"Because you're beautiful, and you're mine, Isabella."

I snorted. "Just go to sleep."

He grabbed me and pulled me to his side of the bed and curled his body up around mine. "I'm working on it."

"Work harder," I mumbled.

His laughter was the last thing I heard before I finally slipped into unconsciousness…

I rolled over and cursed at the sound of Samson panting next to the bed. I reached over for Edward, planning to smack him and make him deal with the stupid dog, only to find that his side of the bed was empty and cold.

He'd been up for a while.

I slowly opened my eyes and blinked, trying to get my bearings, before I glanced over at the clock and cursed again. Edward had let me sleep in and now, if I didn't get ready soon, I'd be late for class.

I threw the covers off my body and sat up, checking the floor for dog shit—because I was not making that mistake again—and reluctantly got out of bed, only to be stopped by the dog at my feet.

"What?" I said in annoyance.

His gruff bark had my ears ringing.

"God damn it, what do you want? Do you need to go out?"

He whined, turned a circle with his bulky body, and barked at me again.

"I will do anything to get you to stop barking." I had a slight hangover going from all that wine I'd consumed in an attempt to drown out my self-pity last night.

I brushed my teeth before I opened the bedroom door, and Samson shot out of the room and raced toward the kitchen, leaving me to trudge through the house alone. I peeked in the rooms as I passed, searching for Edward, and decided that some ibuprofen and a huge glass of water was in order this morning.

And bread. Lots of bread.

I turned the corner into the kitchen and came up short with the sight of Edward standing with the alarm system panel open and the phone next to his ear, punching buttons and murmuring affirmations into the phone at the same time.

He glanced up at me through his glasses and smiled in greeting. He looked so refreshed and so typically good this morning, while I felt like someone was taking a jackhammer to my skull. It kind of pissed me off that he allowed me to drink so much last night, so I just gave him the finger.

He laughed.

Once I had half a glass of water and three pills—an extra for good measure—down my throat, I went back over to him and pulled is head down to kiss him.

"I'm on hold again," he muttered against my lips.

"What are you doing?"

"Changing the security code." He scribbled something on a piece of paper and handed it to me. "This is what I'm changing it to."

I glanced at the numbers and frowned. It seemed like I should recognize their significance, but this morning I was drawing a blank. "What is it?"

"It's the day we met. The day I saw you at the Kodak Theatre. No one will guess this because most assume we met the day you had your interview."

A warm feeling rushed through me. "Baby…"

"Don't 'baby' me; I'm being practical. I decided late last night that too many people know this code and after what happened with James, I can't risk some sort of security breach."

That stifled the feeling. "Nice."

He grinned. "Worrying about your safety isn't romantic? I thought it was incredibly romantic," he teased.

I shook my head, focusing on keeping my lips from turning up into a smile.

"You want romance? I'll give you more romance than you can stand in Paris."

"That's our honeymoon. You're supposed to be romantic and sappy on your honeymoon."

"It's not our honeymoon. I'm taking you elsewhere for that," he countered.

"Where?"

He walked me back to the wall and pressed his hard body against mine. My traitor body immediately responded, becoming hot and flushed with just his movements.

I loved it when he got that dangerously wicked gleam in his eye and that feral, aggressive look on his face. It usually meant we were going to fuck each other mad in a matter of minutes.

"Somewhere we won't need to bother with the view because I'll be too busy fucking my wife the entire time we're there," he said thickly.

Pleasure hummed through me with the sound of him calling me his wife.

His mouth moved to my neck, brushing my hair back and trailing kisses that elicited those intoxicating, all too familiar sparks under my skin, and I moaned. His chuckle vibrated against me until his teeth grazed over my collarbone.

He abruptly pulled away. "Yes, I'm still here," he said into the phone.

I stayed against the wall for a moment, bracing myself so that I didn't collapse at his feet and groaned.

"Sorry," he mouthed.

So was I.

With a heavy sigh, I moved away from him and let him concentrate on the security company representative yammering in his ear. I searched the pantry for any kind of pastry, and stumbled upon a bag of whole wheat blueberry bagels.

Thank God.

Toasted and smothered with butter and cream cheese, I started eating one of the bagels and hopped up on the counter so I could sit and read Edward's e-mail on the Blackberry. I went through his scheduled meetings with different people in the film industry, an upcoming photo call for the cast of Rogue—that ought to be fun—and stopped at an e-mail from one of the producers, informing Edward of a few reshoots scheduled in a couple weeks.

Shit.

I threw down the rest of my bagel, no longer hungry. He was going to be gone for ten days. It was nothing compared to the length of time he was going to be gone to promote the movie, but I had been counting on the next couple of months to just be with him, especially after we got married. Reading that reality was going to come crashing down on us sooner than I'd expected felt like a bucket of cold water had been dumped over my head, and I was now drenched in my unhappiness.

I tossed the Blackberry on the counter and went to dump the rest of my bagel in the trash. Edward's arms came around my waist, bringing me to him, and his teeth nipped at my ear.

"Where were we?"

I spun around to face him. "We're nowhere. I have to get ready for school now," I said reluctantly.

I stepped away from him, only for him to tighten his grip and bring me back to him. "What's wrong?"

I couldn't look at him. I felt so stupid for getting so upset over ten fucking days. "I just went through your e-mails. You have reshoots coming up in two weeks, and they've already sent you a rewrite of one of the scenes. It should be here this afternoon."

"Fuck," he breathed.

"Yeah."

"How long?"

"It said reshoots are scheduled to last for ten days." I dropped my head and let it rest on his chest.

His hands came up to the back of my head, cradling me to him. "Come with me."

I wrenched back to look at him. "I can't, Edward. Someone has to stay here and take care of everything while you're gone, and I have class."

"I'm not going without you," he said, determination flashing in his eyes.

"Babe, be reasonable. Who's going to watch the dog? Who's going to keep track of the Blackberry while you're out in the woods filming with no service? I have a job to do here and classes to go to. As much as I'd love to go with you, I can't."

"I'm not going without you," he repeated. "I'll simply go for my scenes and leave. Reply to their e-mail and tell them I have scheduling conflicts and need to shoot everything that weekend."

"Edward-"

"Bella, I can't imagine picking up and leaving you here right now. I've not heard from Sam with any information regarding James and the thought of him being able to get to you while I'm away is just…" He broke off and brought his mouth to mine, kissing me so ardently, I lost all sense of reason.

I brought my arms around his neck, pressing him to me and winding my fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck. He lifted me up and sat me on the counter, moaning as I rubbed against him.

"Please, love," he whispered.

"Sam will have called you in two weeks," I mumbled breathlessly in return.

"I don't care," he growled, sliding his hands up under my tank top and over my back.

I shivered against him as his touch induced chills. "Okay."

There was a physical response to his relief; his body relaxed against me as his breath came out in a gentle rush against my shoulder. He brought his mouth to mine again and kissed me heedlessly; I knew I needed to stop, that I didn't have time to continue this with him before I had to leave for class, but his skilled mouth kept me silent and his strong hands were all too persuasive.

He rocked against me, and I could have sworn I shook with the intensity of it. I felt Edward's eyes snap open against mine and before I could register the movement, he had scooped me up and carried me to the front door.

He sat me down as everything continued to shake around us, rattling noisily, and used his body as a shield as he struggled with the lock and opened the door. He shoved me out the door and hovered protectively over me, glancing up at the light fixture swaying threateningly over our heads, and ran out to the driveway.

"Is it ever going to stop?" I screeched. The ground trembled under my feet, scaring the absolute shit out of me.

He glanced around as the vibrations slowly died down and without warning, crushed me against him. "Jesus," he swore as he gasped against the panic that had surged through him.

"I fucking hate earthquakes!" I shouted. "We're moving someplace where there aren't earthquakes all the fucking time!"

His laugh penetrated the still morning air, and a grateful calm washed over his face. "It doesn't matter, love. There's always some threat no matter where we go. Earthquakes, tornadoes, hurricanes, wildfires… the list is endless. But I agree with you. No earthquakes."

A siren wailed in the distance and a tree creaked and crackled as it fell and toppled down over the street, blocking anyone from driving past.

Edward scowled. "Well, that's odd."

"Maybe it was half dead?"

"It'd have to be. That earthquake wasn't nearly strong enough to cause such damage."

I shrugged. "Guess I'm not going to class today." I stared back up at him. "You okay?"

He nodded. "I was worried I wouldn't get you out before something came crashing down on us. It seemed so much stronger inside."

"I didn't even realize what happened."

He grinned crookedly. "You did have this dazed look about you."

I punched his shoulder lightly. "Stop."

A keen yowling echoed from Edward's backyard, and a look of anxiety pinched Edward's features just before he sprinted toward the house.

I came upon Edward taking Samson's massive head in his hands and stroking his fur soothingly. The deep red of his coat shimmered as he shuddered with fear and let out a raspy whimper. Edward murmured to him gently, sitting with him and letting him bury his snout into his stomach, and I actually felt sorry for the poor thing.

But what stood out the most was how wonderful Edward was with him and how much he loved him. I'd never really paid much attention to it before because I'd always let my annoyance with Samson's sheer size and ability to slobber everywhere cloud my vision.

I crouched down and reached out tentatively to rub his head. I wasn't sure how he'd react; I knew some dogs snapped when in distress and frankly, I liked having use of both hands.

"Hey, buddy," I cooed. "It's okay."

Edward slowly lifted his eyes to mine.

"Don't."

His lips quirked but he held off his laughter. "I wasn't."

"Good."

We worked on calming the dog for a few minutes before Edward finally released him and stood up.

"Thank you," he said, reaching out to help me to my feet.

I shrugged. "He looked so freaked. I couldn't just stand there and do nothing."

"He was. He's never been through an earthquake before."

My eyes widened. "No?"

"No. The few noticeable ones we've had in LA since I got him have been while I was away filming and happened to take him with me."

"Oh."

"Care to assess the damage with me?"

We went through the house, carefully examining the house and stepping over the occasional scattered shards of glass from pictures and vases that had fallen in the midst of the earth's sudden urge to try to open up and swallow us all whole. Edward turned the TV on and immediately flipped the channels so that we could watch the news.

"I want to see what the magnitude was so I know if I need to call someone to come and check out the houses for any structural damage. I don't think I'll need to, but I'd like to be certain about it."

I opened cabinets, righting things that had toppled over and listening to the newscast. They finally stated that the earthquake had only registered at four-point-six on the Richter scale, which thankfully meant that other than the few destroyed odds and ends, Edward's houses and my apartment were all fine.

I walked over to the sofa table that sat against the wall just beside the doorway and picked up the picture of Edward and me that he'd had printed from the ball. It was one of the very few pictures we had of the two of us together and now, it was sliced through the middle from the broken piece of glass that had sat in the silver frame.

Edward walked up and took it out of my hands. "Just a picture, love. I'll have them make another copy."

"But it was the only good one of us we had," I whined.

"I'll get another copy," he repeated, "and there will be plenty of opportunities in our lives to take more pictures like these. In fact, if you remember, awards season starts in just over three weeks."

I groaned. "Don't remind me." I didn't want to have to sit and watch him on the TV without me.

"Will my fiancée be accompanying me to all of these shows I'm expected to be at?"

"You don't want to wait for the Oscar's?" I asked with wide eyes.

"What's the point? Everyone knows we're together, and we'll be making sure everyone knows Tanya is full of shit in about two days, so…" He threw me a crooked grin.

"I don't know. All those gowns… Can't we just stay home?"

"I wish we could. What do you say?" He searched my face and grinned.

"Well, you already know my answer, apparently, so I guess we're going." To them all.

"I'll make it worth your while, baby. I promise."

* * *

**Edward**

I sat at the little outdoor iron table, glancing around with paranoia while I waited for Sam, and sipped my latte. I'd done every tedious thing possible this morning to make sure I wasn't followed here and that my meeting with a local private investigator was not splashed all over the news; no small feat in itself considering every press outlet known to man was drooling over the fact that my relationship with Tanya Denali had been a scam. So far, I'd ignored more calls than I could count—I was not going to make Bella deal with the incessant ringing of the Blackberry that came with this part of my career—from different publications and calls from Zafrina and the studio themselves. Everyone wanted a quote, but I simply was not interested in giving them anything today.

I had more important things on my mind.

I adjusted my cap so that it covered more of my face and waved Sam over as soon as I spotted him.

"I didn't even recognize you," he laughed as he sat down. He threw a large manila envelope on the table.

"It won't last long. Sooner than I'd like, someone's going to notice that it's me sitting here in the corner," I told him.

He ordered his coffee black and watched the waitress walk away. "She didn't realize it was you?"

I grinned. "No. I lost my accent when I ordered and made sure not to look her in the eye."

"Don't you have any privacy at all?"

"Not unless I'm home," I replied matter of factly.

"I can't even imagine not being able to run down the street for milk without having a million people seeing the pictures of me doing it."

I shrugged. "It was gradual. It wasn't like I walked out of my house to suddenly find a group of paparazzi waiting for me. And it's part of it. Fans want to know what you're doing and where you're going, so to complain about it would seem rather ungrateful."

"Makes sense, I guess." He cleared his throat. "I've got good news and bad news. What do you want first?"

"Whichever," I said with a wave of my hand. "I'll have to hear the bad news either way."

"All right, Tyler's story checks out. Mrs. Crowley is scheduled in at Cedars Sinai oncology department next week." He passed me a small, white envelope with the Cedars Sinai logo on it.

Thank God someone had been honest lately. "That makes my life much easier."

"There's the treatment cost along with some other details and possible incidentals." He paused, knitting his brows thoughtfully. "Can I ask why you wanted it?"

"You can ask, but it doesn't mean I'll tell you." I stared at him levelly.

"Point taken. Ready for the bad news?"

I braced myself and nodded once.

"James is still watching you."

It took me a moment to process that. My brain had gone into shock, although I really wasn't sure why. It wasn't like I expected that little piece of paper to keep James from following Bella, but I'd hoped like hell that his career had been more important than stalking my fiancée. I just sat there numbly, staring at Sam, while my body and mind both raced to catch up to this little development.

"He _what_?" I finally demanded harshly.

"He's still watching you two." He pointed to the large manila envelope sitting between us. "That envelope is full of surveillance photos. He keeps his distance, but he's still looking for something."

Now that the shock was finally wearing off, I was finding that I was growing hot with anger. I had to concentrate on keeping my voice even and not involuntarily seethe at Sam.

Or smash the mug in my hand.

I took a deep breath to continue the conversation. "You don't know what it is he's looking for?"

"Not yet. But I've got Emily checking his records more thoroughly. If we don't find anything there, I'll keep tailing him to see if he slips to someone somewhere."

"God damn it," I snarled. "Why is he so interested in her?"

"I'll find out, Edward," he promised. "In the meantime, be careful. Don't do anything stupid."

I thought evasion was the best response to that statement. I wasn't sure what I'd do if I thought Bella was in danger given how incredibly violent I thought I could be now. "We're actually going out of the country next weekend. Think we'll be followed?"

"What are you going for?" he questioned in return.

"I've got reshoots in Vancouver, and Bella is joining me. I didn't want to leave her here alone with…" I couldn't bear to finish the sentence out loud.

A flicker of sympathy passed through Sam's face before he quickly locked it down. "I understand. I don't think he'll cross the border, especially since you'll be working. I'll let you know if he does, though."

"Thanks."

Sam could sense my worry and anger, so he changed the subject to the earthquake and asked about the film industry while we finished our coffee. I quickly laid a few dollars on the table and parted from him with the comfort that he wasn't going to stop until he knew exactly what James was looking for in Bella.

I managed to get to my car before the paparazzi caught up with me. I pulled the cap off my head and ran my hands through my hair once and then shoved the envelope under my seat. I couldn't even think of what was inside, much less look at the envelope itself; if I did, I would most likely make the situation worse because I wouldn't be able to control my temper or the ripping demand that I had to hurt the man who posed a threat to Bella, and the last thing either of us needed at the moment was for me to make matters worse with the press by publicly attacking James.

So I focused on something else. Like making sure Tyler Crowley didn't decide to use Bella to get a large sum of money again while helping someone get well at the same time.

I ran to my accountant's office and transferred some of my funds around and instructed her to mail a check to a certain facility anonymously. Once I had that taken care of, I drove to the university under the pretense that I was visiting Bella.

And I would. Eventually.

I watched the students and professors pass me by, shrouded by shadows and protected by the small, blackened gap between buildings behind me. The thought crossed my mind that all I did was sneak around since I'd met Bella, but I didn't dwell on it. I'd rather feel like a liar than be without her.

The bloke I recognized from the photos I'd seen at Bella's flat strolled by me, hitching his backpack over his shoulder and listening to something obnoxiously loud on his iPod. I yanked him into the darkness and shoved him up against the wall, gripping the collar of his shirt and inched my face toward his.

"Holy shit," he squeaked.

"I take it I need no introduction." I had to focus on not beating his head against the wall with all the rage I had pounding through my blood.

His head shook violently in answer.

"Excellent. Now, here's what's going to happen. You're going to give that money back to the journalist that you lied to and never speak about Bella again. If you so much as _think_ her name, I will make you pay in ways you can't even begin to imagine. Are we clear?" I asked menacingly.

His mouth opened and closed a few times before he finally gave up on speech and nodded his head. The look on his face was sheer terror, slapping me back into reality again.

I instantly released him, and he started hyperventilating.

"Bloody hell," I muttered in disgust to myself. I'd just taken all my frustration with James out on some poor university student who only wanted to make sure his mother got better.

"Relax, Tyler," I instructed, bending him over. "The last thing I need is for you to pass out. You have a mother to take care of."

"But-"

"I'm sorry. I don't know what possessed me to do that." Well, I did, but no one needed to hear that nonsense. I sounded out of my mind, even to my own ears.

I sighed. "There's an anonymous donation that's been made to Cedars Sinai with specific instructions to be used only for your mother's care."

He lifted his head and stared at me incredulously. "Are you serious?"

I nodded. "But I can revoke the money for her treatment if you ever think about spreading some false story about Bella or me again, whether it's on campus or off. So think about that. A lot."

"You are absolutely fucking nuts." He swallowed hard and stood up.

Possibly. "I'm protective of Bella, because I have to be."

He stared at me blankly.

"I have to be vigilant when it comes to her safety because of my fame; from all of the vile, repulsive people in the world could do anything to her just to get to me or my money. Does that make sense to you?"

"You mean like kidnapping, blackmail… that sort of shit?"

"Exactly," I confirmed.

"Yeah, I get it." He picked up his backpack and slung it over his shoulder. "I guess I'm not really any better."

"No, you're not, but I understand your reasoning and can't say that I wouldn't do the same thing in your position, so I apologize for being such a… lunatic."

He tried to laugh, but it didn't come out right. "You'd do the same thing?"

"I would."

He started out of the alley and turned to face me. "Jesus fucking God, I never want to see you again. Not even in a movie."

I swallowed my laughter. "I think that's probably best, Tyler."

"Uh, thank you, I guess."

"For what?" I asked curiously. _For scaring the bloody piss out of you?_

"For the money."

"I've no idea what you're talking about, Tyler," I deadpanned.

"Yeah. Okay. I got it." He shook his head. "Psycho."

I stood there for a while longer, debating on whether I should just get as far away from Tyler and my insane behavior or if I should just stay on campus and walk Bella to her next class.

Bella naturally won.

I found the lecture hall easily and greeted the gawkers that passed me by. I wasn't sure why it was still so shocking to see me waiting for Bella; everyone had to know by now how serious I was about her.

It wasn't long before students came streaming out of the door. Bella was talking to another student, passionately discussing the writing assignment I knew she'd been working so hard on this last week. She lifted her eyes to where I stood and her entire face lit up with excitement to see me.

She broke away from the crowd and launched herself in my arms, causing her book bag to fall heavily to the floor.

She kissed me once and pulled back. "What are you doing here?"

"I was in the neighborhood."

Her expression instantly turned skeptical. "Edward."

I'd promised to always be honest with her, so I didn't bother to lie again. "All right, I've just come from a meeting with Sam."

Her eyes darted over my face anxiously. "And?"

"James is still following us."

She stood still for a moment before snapping out of it. "Why?"

"He's still working on that."

"Shit," she whispered.

"I might've taken it out on Tyler when I got here," I grudgingly told her. Might as well be completely honest while I was at it.

"You didn't," she replied apprehensively.

I didn't answer.

"Jesus, Edward. What did you do?"

"Erm, I threatened him with physical violence if he so much as thought your name again," I responded sheepishly. "I wasn't thinking straight."

She giggled. "Obviously. Did you scare the shit out of him?"

"No." Though I had probably been close. "I apologized, though. Does that help matters?"

She nodded. "It does. It would also help if I apologized, too."

"I don't think that's needed, love." Not with the large sum of money waiting for his mother at the hospital.

Her eyes sharpened. "What are you hiding from me, baby?"

I smothered my awkward laugh with a cough and kissed her temple. "Nothing. Shall we go to your next class now?" I asked, closing the subject.

"I don't like secrets."

I was fairly certain that keeping this secret would have less of a negative reaction from her than actually telling her what I'd done would.

* * *

I stared out the hotel window into the city below, watching the lights flash and glimmer off the water. Seeing Bella take in the new experience of going through customs Friday and filling out the appropriate forms during our descent into Vancouver had been reminiscent of the day of her interview. Her eyes danced around the airport and her ears perked up at the sounds of everything around us. She examined everything studiously, commenting that she needed to know how to do these things so that I wasn't always having to hold her hand when I traveled with her.

She wouldn't let me help her answer any of the agent's questions, opting to do it all herself even though the man sat behind the glass and stared at me the entire time. He asked the appropriate questions, but I could tell he wasn't listening to any of Bella's answers. It happened when a person became star struck in my presence and could quite honestly get extremely annoying.

Bella, however, was completely oblivious to the man's reaction to me and was proud of herself for getting through customs on her own without being searched or detained for any reason, so I didn't bother telling her that she could have said she was here to blow up the entire city and he wouldn't have noticed.

I reached into the compartment of my carry-on and pulled out Bella's wedding band. I couldn't pinpoint why I was compelled to bring it with me; I wasn't planning to make Bella marry me here in Vancouver instead of Paris, but I just couldn't leave it behind.

"Have you seen this shit?" Bella shouted at me from the living area of our suite.

I threw the ring back into the bag and put on my best curiously innocent face. If Bella knew that I'd brought the ring across the border—and by chance I could lose it—she'd murder me with her bare hands. Not just for her sake, but for my mother's as well.

"What shit?" I called back.

She stomped into the bedroom with her laptop in her hands. "This shit!"

I'd actually been avoiding all media outlets for the last week, letting Zafrina put out generic statements and staying quiet when I was accosted by paparazzi. I didn't feel the need to get myself involved in yet another press war with Tanya. It was childish and unprofessional, and I was completely over it.

"No, I've not."

She shoved the laptop at me and started pointing wildly at the story that was posted on one of the most read blogs in the country. "She called us liars! She said we forged her signature! Is she fucking crazy?" she screeched.

"Actually, I think you might be on to something."

I studied the article and had to stop myself from laughing at how absurd Tanya's story was. "She needs a new publicist," I stated.

"That's all you've got?"

"Well, what do you want me to say?" I asked, giving her an amused look.

"I want you to have Zafrina attack the shit out of her. That's what I want," she retorted. "Better yet, I'll go down to the set myself and yank her God damned hair out!"

She stormed off toward the hotel door, and I had to drag her back into the room so that she didn't do something she'd regret later.

"Come back, baby. You need to calm down before you go anywhere," I laughed.

"Edward," she huffed. "I'm not letting her get away with badmouthing us anymore. You shouldn't either."

"Bella, I'm not saying another word. She made the mistake of trying to make me look bad, and I've retaliated. End of story. I'm only going to make myself look just as ridiculous if I continue to argue with her publicly. No one wants to listen to that sort of rubbish."

"Edward-"

"Bella, the studio will shut her up. They're not going to want all of this bad publicity surrounding the film."

"You think?"

I nodded. "She waited until now to say anything this harsh, thinking that I wouldn't be able to do anything while we're together on set later today. And while technically, she's correct, she didn't take into consideration that the executives have millions of dollars invested in this film and won't hesitate to make sure that her idiocy doesn't cut into their profits."

She flopped down onto the bed and gave me an apologetic look. "Sorry. I got a little nuts there myself."

I sat next to her and shook my head. "You can't even begin to imagine how much I appreciate having someone ready and willing to go to battle against the people who try to bring me down. Someone who can do it publicly without fear of exposing themselves for what they truly are to me. And how happy I am that person is you."

She laid her head on my shoulder. "Today is going to suck for you, isn't it?" she asked, peering up at me.

I was scheduled to film my final scene this afternoon… the _only_ scene I had to reshoot with Tanya in the span of the entire weekend, and neither Bella nor I were looking forward to it.

"Most likely." I ran my fingers through her hair and grinned down at her. "Run my lines with me before breakfast?"

I got out the few pages of rewrites I'd copied and brought with us and handed it to her so that I could make sure I had it all memorized. She read from the script flatly, tripping over the occasional sentence, and I struggled not to laugh at how horrible she was the entire time.

"Shut up!" she finally screeched, throwing the script at me and laughing when it pegged me in the center of my forehead.

"Well, now you've done it." I launched myself at her and tackled her to the bed, tickling her ribs until she was breathless and begging for mercy.

"No more! No more! Let's eat!" she giggled.

I kissed her jaw and grinned crookedly. "We're finished acting like teenagers now?"

"Yes. You win. I can't take any more."

We decided to order room service and ate breakfast together with the news playing in the background before I had to leave for my call time with hair and makeup. I somehow convinced Bella to hang back since I wasn't sure when I'd finish and pack so that we could leave as soon as I returned if necessary. I kissed her goodbye, and then I headed out to the car waiting in valet for me.

I arrived on set and spoke to all the familiar faces and introduced myself to the few new ones. I spotted Jacob waiting by the director and walked toward him. I glanced around and noticed everyone milling around and not really working like usual.

"What's going on?"

"Tanya," Jacob explained simply.

"What now?" I asked in exasperation.

"She's throwing a fit about her makeup and her costume. Oh, and you," Jacob laughed.

"If she doesn't watch it, the executives are going to make it so that she doesn't work again. She's gone too far with this… grudge she has against you," the director stated.

"I'll take care of it."

I quickly made my way to her trailer and heard her screams coming from inside as I approached. A young girl came bursting out of the door with a frightened look on her face and bumped into me in her hurry to do whatever Tanya had demanded.

I didn't even bother knocking and just went inside. "Would you shut up? I can hear you from the bloody set."

She whirled around and set her steely gaze on me. "You!"

She lunged for me; I deftly dodged her blow and grabbed a hold of her wrists to restrain her. "Have you gone absolutely mad?" I shouted.

She said nothing, just continued to try to wiggle herself free from my grasp.

"I'm not letting go with the risk that you'll rear back and slap me, Tanya, so stop struggling," I ground out angrily.

She huffed and stopped fighting me, spinning around and sitting on the couch once I released her.

"Do you think you can possibly stop being such a self-centered bitch for two hours so we can shoot this scene?"

"I lost the role I had lined up because of you and your stupid wh-"

"Don't you say it," I growled. "You lost the role because you went stark-raving mad on New Year's Eve and tried to ruin my relationship with Bella, as well as my reputation. You have no one to blame but yourself."

"I tried to save my career because you couldn't keep your fucking dick in your pants!" she spat.

"Bollocks. You know as well as I do that my dick had nothing to do with your actions that night. You were pissed that I had a life outside of this," I waved my hand between us, "ridiculous agreement and no longer needed you. You wanted to make yourself look good, and instead of acting like an adult, you shot your mouth off to the first journalist who'd listen, never regarding the contract or the possible consequences of your actions. So don't you dare try to pin this on me or Bella."

"You made me look like a fool, leaking that contract out!" she shrieked.

"Did you honestly think I'd just lie down and let you walk all over me? Say what you wanted about Bella?" I started pacing the trailer. "We've worked together enough for you to know better than that."

She started to say something else, but I was tired of this conversation and just wanted to finish the scene so I could get out of this city and away from Tanya.

"If you keep going with this," I interrupted, "the executives will make sure that you don't work again."

Her eyes narrowed fractionally and she went rigid in her seat. She glanced away before she finally answered. "Fine," she said tightly.

"Great. Wonderful. Brilliant. See you in a minute." I exited the trailer and went back to the set, informing everyone that she'd finally stopped throwing her little tantrum.

Tanya didn't speak to me unless it was due to dialogue, which suited me just fine; I didn't think I had anything decent to say to her at the moment, anyway.

We finally wrapped four hours later, and I quickly went back to the hotel room and took Bella in my arms the moment I walked through the door.

"That bad?" she asked against me.

"That bad."

"We're all packed up if that makes you feel any better."

"Surprisingly, it does."

The ride to the airport was quiet. I watched the scenery fly by and let myself be comforted by the feel of Bella's hands against mine and the way her thumb brushed against my palm.

I took Bella's bag from her and led her toward the check-in counter. My eyes passed over her passport, and I abruptly stopped and stared up at the board beside us, scanning through the departing flights.

"Edward, what are you doing?"

I pointed to the flight scheduled in three hours for Heathrow. "Bella, are you absolutely needed at home?"

She looked between me and the board, completely baffled. "What? No, I guess not, why?"

"I'm thinking now's the perfect opportunity to catch a flight to London. And then go to Paris," I said casually through the thrumming beat of my heart in my throat.

"What?" she shouted, immediately looking around to make sure no one had heard her.

"You don't want a couple more stamps in your passport?" I asked, arching my brow playfully.

"Edward, I-" She cut herself off and started glowing with excitement. She grinned up at me and sucked in a breath. "Do you have the ring?"

I reached in the front pocket of my carry-on bag and pulled out the small, velvet box that held her wedding band. "I have the ring."

Her eyes widened in disbelief. "I don't have one picked out for you. Or a dress. Or a-"

I bent down and kissed her silent. "We can get all of it there, love," I whispered reassuringly.

I could vaguely feel her mobile buzzing in her pocket. She jerked back and checked her message, the look of disbelief slowly disappearing and becoming one of anticipation instead. "Let's do it," she said firmly.

"You're sure?" I asked, wondering what was on that message that made her so certain all of the sudden.

She nodded. "Let's get married."


	28. Chapter 28

**The readalong on Twitter is tonight, and because of that, I'm posting this lovely, fluffy chapter for you guys! *mocks major excitement* Anyway, check out theficbridge(dot)blogspot(dot)com for info if you're interested in joining. I can't promise I'll be there, because I'm likely to be a nervous wreck. I'm anxious for the exposure but terrified of everyone's opinions, as always.**

**I'll just be quick with my note about the chapter and tell you that writing it seriously sucked ass... There were a shitton of stipulations that I had to figure out to get them married and it actually changed the location of their honeymoon (in the next chapter), but I think it actually will work out better than what I originally planned. At least it's realistic.**

**Thanks to anyone and everyone who either pimped out TMWCBM for the readalong or is participating in the readalong. I hope what I've written for this fic so far is worth it.**

**Massive, I mean, gargantuan thanks are in order to Claireoth for staying up for hours upon hours to do this readalong. I am so appreciative of you, you have no idea. Another big thanks goes out to gossip_bangkok for doing her own promoting and being a huge supporter of TMWCBM. **

**Thanks to Stratan for fixing my strange use of the word "decent" yesterday. I have no idea what that was about-apparently, I wanted to say the plane looked okay?-but you caught it, so we're good :p Ah, me and my blonde moments...**

**Even if you skip A/N's you should READ THIS: I've signed up for the Fics For Nashville Auction and will be doing an outtake for TMWCBM in Samson's POV. If you've ever wondered what goes through his mind, then head over to the site and donate to get every single participating author's contribution. There are many, many talented authors pledging outtakes for this cause. I can't wait to see what they all have come up with!**

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* * *

Chapter 28

**Bella**

I spent the entire flight to London curled up in the dark leather first class seat in Edward's arms, eventually falling asleep with my head on his shoulder. I listened to the classical music he'd put on my iPod to drown out the sound of the flight attendants and the occasional screaming of a baby coming from the back. I didn't want to think about anything other than the happiness that bubbled up inside me the closer we got to our destination, and that I was really only a matter of hours away from marrying the man sleeping beside me.

And so I didn't. I shut everything off except for the way I imagined his eyes and his smile as he watched me walk down the aisle and to our future together and let myself dream about the days ahead and everything I'd finally get to see, because I knew Edward would make it a point to show me everything he could while we were in Paris.

Sights of the Eiffel Tower and Da Vinci, scents of cafés mingling with Edward's cologne, tastes of crêpes and French wine, and sounds of cathedral bells ringing flickered through my mind, keeping that sense of euphoria sweeping through me while I slept.

I woke up just before we started our descent and somehow managed to sit up and stretch without waking Edward, even with his arm plastered to my back and his head resting on top of mine. I stared at him, lost in the way his face seemed so innocent right now, and had this sudden, incomprehensible urge to cry. He'd picked me. Out of every woman who'd ever seen one of his movies or watched him laugh in an interview on TV or passed him on the sidewalk and gawked; out of every past girlfriend that had somehow captured his attention, none of them were who he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. He'd only asked me.

And I'd been so wrong for him at the beginning. So unwilling and prideful. So afraid and stubborn. How could he have known that we would be worth rearranging his entire life for? He'd had faith in me—in us—from that very first kiss on the side of the road in the rain. He'd made me believe in everything I'd lost sight of, everything I'd been so jaded about.

He was…

Well, no singular word that came to mind could come close to describe him. I'd told him he was beautiful once before—and he was, inside and out—but he was more than that. He was joy and hope and comfort. He was steady and strong and so funny through his aristocratic speech. He defied every preconceived notion that I'd had of celebrities and fame, showing me his inherent kindness and generosity. He was _good_.

He was the pure, wondrous rush of love.

Edward stirred at the sound of the captain announcing our descent, and I immediately turned away from him so he wouldn't see the tears that stung my eyes and worry about me.

I should've known he'd see them anyway.

He lightly grabbed my chin, and his eyes widened with alarm as soon as he saw the tears that brimmed my eyes. "We can go home." His voice was still thick with sleep. "If you're not ready, we can go back."

"No," I sobbed, shaking my head. "I'm crying because I'm happy. I think. I don't know. I looked at you, and all this shit came at me so fast I couldn't help it. I feel like such a dumbass."

He wiped at the tears that were spilling down my cheeks. "You're happy enough to cry?"

I nodded. "I'm going to be a bumbling mess when we say our vows."

His responding smile was blinding. "Then we'll be matching bumbling messes, because if you think I can make it through the ceremony without getting emotional, you're in for a surprise."

I laughed at the vision of Edward actually crying; I'd never seen him cry. "Yeah, right. You'll be up there saying those vows perfectly like you do when you have to give a speech."

"You honestly don't know the power you have over me, do you, Isabella?" His smile turned rueful.

"I guess not," I muttered.

Edward changed the subject and began questioning me about which sights I wanted to see in Paris and if there was any specific hotel I wanted to stay in. I didn't, so I simply told him whatever was available was fine with me.

"You want to see Notre-Dame, Versailles, and the Eiffel Tower," he verified.

"Oh, and I want to hit the Louvre."

"Anything else?" he asked.

"I want to see it all, Edward," I said excitedly. "Who knows when I'll get to come back?"

He seemed very amused with my eagerness. "If I have it my way, I'll take you someplace new every year so you can see the world. You're extremely sheltered."

I rolled my eyes, but I knew how right he was.

"We should stop by Mum and Dad's for a bit before we leave London."

My ears were clogging up from the pressure, and I was sure I'd heard him wrong. "You want to what?"

"During our layover we should go to Mum and Dad's and say a quick 'hello'," he said with a laugh. "Pressure bothering you, love?"

I nodded and worked to pop my ears while I sorted through the panic that rose in my chest. "Do we have time?"

He frowned and glanced at his watch before checking his ticket for our Paris flight. "Just enough."

"Okay." I gave him a smile, but I was pretty sure it came out more like a grimace judging by the bemusement on his face.

"You don't want to?"

"No, I just… My ears hurt," I lied.

"Bella-"

"I have to pee," I interrupted, bouncing in my seat and looking at the ground closing in outside instead of him. I caught sight of a curving streak of gray and gasped. "Look! Is that the Thames?"

My genuine excitement had distracted him. He stared out the window and nodded. "It is."

"I thought it was bigger." I frowned at the river below.

"It widens the further east you are. As it reaches the North Sea," he informed me.

"Oh."

"It passes through Oxford, as well," he stated with a crooked grin.

"It does?" I needed to take a world geography class or something.

"It does."

Before I knew it, we were exiting the plane. Edward carried both of our bags through the terminal and pulled out his cell phone, ignoring the commotion we'd caused around him.

"Z called," he mumbled.

"You talk to her. I'm going to the bathroom. Can you grab me something to drink?" I asked, glancing back at him over my shoulder as I ducked into the bathroom.

He nodded and stared after me, puzzled by my actions.

I locked myself in a stall and called Alice, fidgeting while I listened to the ringing of the line in my ear.

"I don't have much time, Bella," she said pointedly.

"Oh." I laughed nervously. "Oh, yeah."

"Why did you buy the tickets if you were just going to second guess everything?"

"I don't know. It's so important to him—to me, too—I don't want anything to ruin it."

"It's going to work, I promise."

I breathed out as all the tension left my body. Alice's word was like steel. Unbendable. "You have everyone's numbers? You're going to take care of e-mailing my professors?"

She giggled. "I am. And I'm calling a few bridal shops in Paris for you to go to since I won't be there to help."

"You're helping," I protested shrilly. "You have to help!"

"I'll tell them what you like and dislike, all right?" she asked, trying her best to comfort me.

"But this is such a big decision, what if I look like I did in that photo shoot? You saw the pictures, Alice. I looked-"

"Bella, stop. It's your dress; you need to pick it out for yourself. Even if you cover yourself with a sheet and wear a veil, Edward will think you're the most gorgeous bride that walked the aisle. Don't stress yourself out."

I bit down on my lip and bounced my foot. "Yeah, okay."

"And stop being so anxious. You're going to give away the surprise."

Which reminded me…

"He wants to go visit your parents, Alice."

"Ah, shit. All right, I'll call Mum and tell her you're there and what time your connecting flight to Paris departs. She'll stay clear of the house in case Edward_ does_ happen to stop by."

"Thank you," I said earnestly. "We couldn't do this without you."

"You could, but it wouldn't be as easy. I'll call you later. Go be with my brother and enjoy Paris, Bella."

I stepped out of the stall and went to wash my hands—I didn't step foot in a public restroom without doing so—and slipped my phone back into my pocket before meeting back up with Edward outside the bathroom.

I laughed at the annoyance on his face while he stood in the center of a group of fans and signed miscellaneous items. He lifted his eyes to where I stood and smiled in relief, politely excusing himself and coming to bring me into his arms.

"Thank God. They all swarmed me as soon as you were out of sight."

I giggled. "Sorry. What did Zafrina want?"

"She called to ask why we didn't get off the plane in LA." He flashed a lopsided smile and started leading me… somewhere. "So I lied and said we had some last minute business to attend to in London and would be back in a few days."

"Uh-huh."

"I didn't tell her about us eloping," he whispered.

I stopped walking and glared at him. "Why the hell not?"

"I didn't want anyone to overhear and spoil it before we even arrived." He gave me a funny look. "What reason were you thinking of?"

"I actually don't know."

I noticed that Edward was following signs that pointed to the baggage claim area, and it had been my experience that street exits were always near those little carousels…

Shit.

"Where are we going?" I asked as nonchalantly as possible, but it was useless with how jittery I'd become.

"Mum and Dad's." There was that funny look again. "What is the matter with you?"

I tugged on his hand and tried to walk back toward the gate we would be leaving from before we passed the security checkpoint, only to feel like I was pulling dead weight.

Because Edward wasn't moving.

"I don't think we have time," I said, struggling for a good excuse not to leave the airport. "I really want to see your parents, and I think I'll wind up talking your mom's head off if I do. Not only that but if we get out of this airport, I'm going to want to see Big Ben and Tower Bridge and go up in the Eye. I don't want to miss our flight, baby." I put on my best innocent face and big, doe eyes.

"Well, I did try to call Mum a minute ago, only to not get an answer."

"Try her again. Maybe she's busy. We can stop by on the way back through." I waved him forward and started walking back the way we came, realizing how much of a commotion we were causing in the terminal.

My steps faltered as I glanced at the huge crowd that had been following us. "Whoa."

Edward chuckled and gently captured my wrist in his hand. "What are you hiding?" he murmured in my ear.

"The prodigal son returns," I whispered, ignoring the question.

"Yes. Now, are you going to tell me why you're acting so strangely?" It wasn't really so much a question as it was a command.

There was no use in lying; I severely sucked at it. "I can't lie worth shit so um, you'll just have to wait and see. It's your surprise. Your wedding gift." Awkward pause. "Yeah."

He started to sulk but caught himself. "All right. Get me out of here before I have to sign autographs until I can't open my hand again."

"You got it. Is there a VIP lounge we can go to while we wait to board?"

"Brilliant idea, Miss Swan," he praised with a teasing grin. "You should fly with me more often."

"You don't use the VIP areas?" I asked in disbelief.

"No. I usually don't sit in an airport for three hours. Everyone knows better than to schedule my flights so far apart. If you hadn't noticed by now, I'm a walking fire hazard."

I giggled and nodded enthusiastically. He most definitely was.

* * *

As soon as we got outside Charles De Gaulle Airport, Edward got on his phone and started making various phone calls and hotel reservations while we waited for a car to pick us up. I didn't pay much attention to what he was saying because I was too busy looking around for the Eiffel Tower and freezing my ass off. He looked so warm in his black pea coat and gloves; I wanted to just beat him for not making me bring a better jacket with me.

"It's so fucking cold!" I shouted. I had my arms wrapped around myself in an effort to keep warm.

Edward immediately ended his call and let me burrow against him. "We're going shopping right now," he said to appease me, leaning forward and kissing my hair. "That jacket you brought with you to Vancouver isn't going to keep you warm if we walk any."

I wanted to say, "No shit?" but I couldn't get it out since my teeth were chattering so violently.

"Nnnn-" was what managed to come out.

He chuckled. "You're spoiled from living in LA for so long. It's not that cold."

"Not all of us are bred from people used to the cold and the rain." A car sloshed through the slush on the ground, proving my point. You'd never see that in LA.

He stared down at me and frowned. "Do you want my coat?"

I shook my head and stopped the chattering long enough to speak again. "I'm fine. I'm just being a baby."

"No, you're being stubborn." He wrapped his coat around my body anyway.

The car—I use this term loosely; it was a fucking limousine—finally pulled to the curb, and I quickly climbed inside so I didn't have to deal with any of the stares of people around us. So far, Edward had managed to walk through the terminal and customs without really being recognized. And if he was, no one had bothered him.

I was perfectly happy to keep it that way. I wanted no one to ruin my little vacation.

Edward leaned forward and quietly gave the driver our destination before settling back in the seat with me.

"What do you think so far?" he asked as he stared out the window with me.

I didn't know how to answer that. I was in awe of how modern highways and skyscrapers stood against classic French architecture and Gothic cathedrals and cobblestone streets. The sky was dreary, but it just seemed to make the colors of the blue rooftops we passed pop even more. Paris itself was expansive—much like LA—but it was so… different. It was rich in history and culture, while LA seemed so new and mostly shallow.

"I don't know what to think," I said with a laugh.

Everything passed in blur; the next thing I knew we were driving the circle around the Arc de Triomphe and down the Champs-Élysées.

"Holy shit," I breathed, trying to take it all in at once before we drove away.

"You have plenty of time to look around, love. We're stopping here." He pointed out the window to a series of stores that lined the avenue.

As soon as the driver had a decent place to pull aside, Edward asked him to be back in a few hours and then helped me out of the car and into the breathtakingly cold air.

I gasped and rushed into the first shop I saw with Edward right behind me. I glanced around the store and immediately went to go back outside, only to slam face first into Edward's chest.

"I don't need anything this fancy."

Edward simply grinned and moved further into the store. "I like this." He held out an ivory wool coat with brown buttons that stopped just below my ass and waited for my opinion.

"It's cute," I admitted, slowly walking over to him and checking the price tag.

I nearly fainted.

"I'm not paying that much for a coat I'll only use for a few days. You're insane," I hissed, making sure I didn't attract any unwanted attention.

"I'm buying it. You wear a small, yes?"

He smiled ingenuously at me, and I was so worn out from the flight and jetlag, I went ahead and gave in. "Yep."

"Cheer up, love. We'll walk down the way a bit and grab a bite to eat before we check in at the hotel. Then we'll go you wherever _you'd_ like."

He thought he was so damn cute.

I walked out of the store in my new coat and slipped on the knit hat and gloves that I'd found to go with it, while Edward pulled the scarves he'd picked out for the two of us out of the bag. Somehow, I'd managed to let him convince me to buy three bags full of clothes—not including the two bags for himself—and a set of luggage at Louis Vuitton to take our new purchases back home in before the morning was over.

And I had absolutely no recollection of how he did it. I went in empty handed, and came out with an armful of insanely expensive shit in _every_ store we went into.

_Sneaky bastard._

"How do you do that?" I demanded.

"Do what?" He seemed honestly confused.

"Convince me to buy something I would never dream of buying on my own? _Without me even realizing what you're doing_?"

He laughed. "I am, am I?"

"Don't be cute. I've had just about enough of you acting cute," I warned with a playful grin.

"Lighten up, baby," he responded, moving the shopping bags into one hand and throwing his free arm over my shoulder. "We're in Paris, for God's sake. It's a must to come back with something Chanel, Louis Vuitton, and Hermes for you girls, isn't it?"

"Not for me."

"Ah." He paused, considering his answer; his lips twitched since he was so damn entertained with me. "You'll be the envy of everyone you know. How about that?"

"I already am."

His eyebrows shot up. "I don't think I'll look at any of your friends the same way again. Except perhaps Rosalie. I don't think she's interested in me at all. Much too far up Emmett's arse for that."

"Good thing, too."

We grabbed a quick lunch at a nearby restaurant and then loaded our bags into the car and drove to the hotel. It took me only a matter of seconds before I fell asleep, even though I'd tried so hard to stay awake so I could see the Eiffel Tower.

It was elusive. I'd been in Paris for hours and hadn't seen a glimpse of it yet.

Edward gently shook me awake when we arrived at the hotel and led me into the lobby while the staff took care of our bags. I latched onto his arm as my eyes darted around our posh surroundings. I was terrified I'd knock into something and break it, and then poor Edward would be forced to pay to replace it.

"Where are we?" I whispered as we walked over to the woman behind the front desk.

"George V," he responded in flawless French. "It's a bit trite for an actor to stay here, but they're very good about keeping their guests' identities private and because…" He trailed off and smiled wickedly. "There might be a chance I'll show you when we get to our suite."

I followed Edward to the room and went inside, gaping as I looked around.

"You pulled out all the stops," I finally said when I could talk again.

The room was ivory and white, and accented in gold. A brocade couch sat against the wall; a crystal chandelier hung from the ornate ceiling. The period furnishings scattered throughout the suite upholstered in velvety gold and ivory were surprisingly inviting, and a bottle of champagne sat chilling on the glass dining table. It was perfect. Immaculate.

He shrugged and pointed for our luggage to be put in the corner. "I suppose we should unpack so nothing gets wrinkled before we get a chance to wear it."

I giggled. "Can't use an iron, Masen?"

"Of course I can. I just prefer not to."

I went to check out the bedroom, and found myself sighing at the sweet sight of the white tulips sitting on the dresser.

Edward came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist. "I'd love to see you carry these with you down the aisle," he murmured into my ear.

"They are my favorite."

"I do remember you mentioning it a while back." He placed a kiss on my jaw.

"They can get them this early in the year?" I questioned, leaning back into him.

"Obviously they can."

"Smart ass."

I broke away from him and set about unpacking everything. There were a few things I still needed, like more underwear and of course, a wedding dress, and Edward promised we could get everything tomorrow since I was all shopped out.

"Where would you like to go next, love?"

"Eiffel Tower," I said resolutely. "I haven't seen a single piece of the fucker all day. Give me a sign to wear around my neck that says 'tourist' because you can bet I'm going to take my camera."

Edward laughed and took my hand, leading me to the balcony. He opened the curtains to expose the view to me and waited smugly for my reaction.

There it was, standing right in front of me.

I sobbed once, and then started laughing at myself for getting so emotional over an iron structure that I'd seen in thousands of pictures.

Edward watched me try to get a hold of myself worriedly. "Bella?"

"I'm sorry. I… I never thought I'd see it unless it was in a book or on the internet. And here I am because of you. I'm just having another girly-hormonal moment. Give me a minute, and I'll be fine."

He stood back and waited anxiously for me to finally get my shit together. When I was finished being so overwhelmed by the turn my life had taken, I stood on my toes and kissed him gently.

"Thank you," I said softly.

"You're welcome."

We walked to Champ de Mars, stopping in at little shops on the way by and poking around. Edward found a few small things for Alice and had them shipped to her in Texas, and I found something for Rosalie but wanted to keep it in hand so that I could give it to her myself when I saw her. We grabbed coffees to keep us warm and sipped them as we walked down the green to the massive tower before us.

Each step brought me closer to what had virtually been a dream. Back home, Edward made life seem so normal for us when we were alone. Now—here—staring up into the slowly darkening sky at the eighty-one story lattice tower, I realized how much my life had changed. I'd never want for anything because of Edward's success. We could go travel anytime we wanted and live anywhere in the world. I had a family now; people who were there for me always. Something broader than just Charlie. I'd been able to experience soul-deep, gratifying love. Without Edward, standing on French soil would be highly unlikely for me for years to come—if ever.

Edward moved in front of me, pulling my hat down and asking if I was cold since the temperature was dropping with the sun. I shook my head and as I watched him fret over me, I realized he looked good here in Paris. Well, he looked good anywhere, but he seemed to fit in with our surroundings; the cobblestone streets, the quaint cafés, the regality of the ancient buildings surrounding us, and the proper European gardens. He belonged in Europe, not America.

His lips lifted on one side, and his curious eyes met mine. "What?"

"You don't belong in LA. You belong here."

"In Paris?" he questioned.

"Yes."

"I belong with you. Wherever that may be."

"Well, that's here," I replied, looking around.

"You want to move to Paris?" he asked, cocking his brow.

"No." I was quickly realizing that textbook French and conversational French were two totally different things. I seemed to miss every third word spoken to me. "I mean Europe. As a generalization."

"I _am_ European…"

I rolled my eyes. "Are you going to make fun of me the whole time?"

He kissed my nose and grinned. "No. Want to go up?"

"There?" I asked, pointing to the observation deck.

He nodded his affirmation.

I lit up from head to toe. "Hell, yeah! Let's go!"

* * *

**Edward**

I reread the e-mail I'd gotten from Zafrina this morning and huffed with irritation. We'd been spotted in Paris, and she was now scrambling for an excuse that would explain me being here with Bella instead of back home in LA.

I wasn't ready for anyone to know my true purpose in bringing Bella to Paris yet. We had enough paparazzi following us and incessant questions revolving around our relationship; I had absolutely no doubt that as soon as the fact that we were married was leaked, attempting to leave the house would become impossible, and I didn't want that for Bella. I wanted to at least try to give her as much privacy as I could while we still lived in LA.

I quickly typed in my reply on the Blackberry, instructing her to evade the questions. The "You've not spoken to me, so you can't confirm or deny that I'm there" type of response was the only suggestion I had for her. I hated to do it, but mollified my guilt by telling her that as soon as we were home, I'd let her know why we were here. I didn't trust technology a bit these days. Anyone could hack into my e-mail account at any time, and I was making Bella my wife this evening. Nothing would change that. Plans had been set in motion—complicated, extremely troublesome plans. To have my lawyers send copies of each piece of documentation required for a Paris wedding in such a short amount of time had been time consuming and expensive. So costly, in fact, that I hadn't even bothered to ask how much the civil servant had to be bribed to process the paperwork immediately.

Not that it really mattered. I'd gladly sell my soul to make it happen. Everything that I was belonged to Bella anyhow.

"Wow, babe. You look…" Bella didn't finish.

I glanced up at our reflections in the mirror and smiled. "It looks all right?"

She nodded and skimmed her hand over the smooth, black satin lapel. "We're getting married today," she whispered in amazement.

I pulled her up to stand with me on the pedestal and motioned for the tailor to give me a moment. "We are. Still don't believe it?" Those were the first words she'd uttered upon waking this morning, and she was obviously still having problems wrapping her mind around the concept, though I really didn't see why.

She shook her head.

I chuckled as I took her face in my hands. "Why not? I'm standing here with you in a black tuxedo, and you have my ring in your pocket. Doesn't get any realer than that, love."

"I don't have a dress."

"We'll find your dress," I responded confidently, kissing her softly before continuing. "We've not even begun to look yet."

"What if we don't?" She bit down on her lip nervously.

"Then we'll get married in what we wore here. I personally don't care," I told her.

She laughed. "Yeah, getting married in jeans and a sweater is exactly how I saw us doing this."

"I happen to like that jumper," I said, looking down to where her nipples were visible through the deep green fabric.

My face must've given it away, because she didn't even bother to look down before she quickly covered herself and blushed. "How long have they been like that?" she hissed.

"A while," I said with a satisfied grin.

"Oh, my God," she mumbled in humiliation. "I look like I don't own a bra."

"No one's looking at you. Not with me around. They wouldn't dare," I said lowly.

Her brow winged up challengingly. "You really think that kind of possessiveness is going to work for me?"

"I've no doubt. You're mine; before the night is over, you'll be Bella Masen."

"I think I'm keeping my maiden name." She shrugged and turned to walk away, but I yanked her back so that her body was flush with mine.

"Like hell you are," I growled.

She moaned quietly. "We should get married every day. You, like this, is such a turn on."

"Oh?"

She slid her hand between us and cupped me, causing me to jerk with her touch. "Hurry up. We still have to pick out a tie color."

"Black," I choked out. I was working very hard to not embarrass myself when she moved away from me.

"Black?"

"Yes."

"You in solid black? Me in solid white?"

"Since we decided to get married at the Black and White Ball, it seems rather fitting. Don't you think?"

She shook her head. "I shouldn't even be looking at white dresses. You've made it so that I'm _so_ far from being virginal... Pretending to be virtuous would be all sorts of wrong."

"Oh, come on, Isabella. I know you're well aware that chaste is not the only definition of virtuous. You're good. Honest."

"You have a stupidly high opinion of me, baby."

I tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. "Of course I do. I love you."

"And I love you." She gasped and stared up at me wide eyed with some realization. "We don't have a prenup!"

"I don't want a bloody prenup," I snarled back. "It's unnecessary."

"Edward, be serious. I can't have people thinking I'm marrying you just to take your money."

"Bella, no one will-"

"Don't fucking argue with me. You know they will."

I moved away from her and tugged at my hair with frustration. I knew she was right, but trying to get a prenuptial agreement was likely to be difficult. Trying to do so now would rush me to find a lawyer who would actually draw one up in a matter of hours; as soon as the thought crossed my mind, I knew how impractical that was. It would be easier to wait until we got back to LA and have the lawyers I knew and trusted draw up a postnuptial agreement, but as soon as it was filed, any journalist would have access to the records and then would start digging into our lives again. I wanted Bella to be able to go home and take my name, even if she didn't use it openly.

And it wasn't like Bella would ever try to take all my money if our relationship went awry. As much as it pained me to think about it, if she ever wanted to leave me and I tried to offer her some sort of divorce settlement, she wouldn't take a single penny of it.

"Sod it, Bella. I'm not living my life for the fucking media."

"Ed-"

"No. End of discussion." I waved the tailor back over and focused on calming myself again instead of Bella's insistence to look "proper" for the press.

She stiffened. "Don't you even think about trying to make this decision on your own."

I sighed. "Do you need one to marry me?"

"No, I don't, but I don't want to be called a gold digger, Edward." She looked so wretched, I couldn't bear it.

I threw her against me, hissing when the one of the pins pierced the skin at my ankle and kissed her so that she knew how sorry I was without me saying the words. "If I get a postnuptial agreement, it could pique a journalist's interest when it gets filed and then there will be no keeping our marriage a secret from anyone. I don't want you to have to deal with the aftermath," I said softly.

"Oh. I guess we wouldn't want that."

I gave her a wry smile. "No."

"Okay. No prenup. Or postnup. Whatever."

I finished having the tuxedo fitted and paid for it, making sure they were aware that I would be back in a few hours to pick it up before I went with Bella to the bridal shop, even though I had no idea why I'd gone.

I didn't plan to see her in her dress until the moment we were poised to say "I do".

Bella started roaming the store, scrunching up her nose at every single dress that she passed by. After walking through the entire store twice, she finally decided on two dresses to try on, only to immediately hate them as soon as she'd pulled them onto her body, not even bothering to come out of the fitting room to take a closer look.

We left empty handed and found that each shop Bella went into gave us the exact same problem. She might like the dresses on the rack but as soon as she started trying them on, they were all too elaborate or flimsy or frilly or_ something_. She found a complaint about each one.

It was exasperating.

Bella seemed to be having more luck at Monique Lhullier, so I decided to sit with my mobile and toy with vows. I didn't want to just say the traditional vows since my relationship with Bella was anything but traditional, but I was having trouble finding the words to express how I felt without seeming redundant. I never shied away from telling Bella exactly what was on my mind and now, I was wishing I would have thought to save something for tonight.

I heard a swish of fabric come from behind me and turned to see Bella coming toward me in a dress. I immediately averted my eyes before my brain could register any detail other than the color white and stared at the ceiling, stammering and just being absurdly incoherent. I did _not_ want to see this dress, if it was the one. I wanted to do at least this one thing right.

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Bella, go back into the fitting room."

"What? Why? I wanted to see what you thought of this one."

"My thought is that I'm not going to even so much as glance at it," I replied with a laugh, turning away from her.

"Edward, come on. We're with each other on our wedding day. I don't think you seeing the dress is going to make much of a difference."

"That's not the point, love." God, how I wanted to look at her, but I didn't dare. "I want to do this right. I want to see you in all your glory walking toward me when we get married tonight. I want the full effect. I want that memory seared into my brain for all eternity."

She let out this laugh that sounded a bit like "Uh" and then stood there for a moment, waiting for me to do or say something else, but I wasn't giving in.

"You suck," she whined, finally spinning around and going back to the fitting room.

I stared off in the direction she'd disappeared in and decided that in order to avoid a repeat of what had just happened I needed to go outside and wait for her.

I wasn't sure how long I leaned against the stone wall, typing in idea after idea into the Blackberry for my vows to Bella, and then trying to make some sense out of them, only for nothing to come to fruition. I was putting too much pressure on myself and drawing a blank, so I finally just quit and sent Bella a text message telling her that I was going for a walk and that if I hadn't returned before she was finished, to ring me and I'd come right back.

I hurried down the street and back to the Cartier store where we'd purchased my platinum band and slipped inside, knowing exactly what I wanted to get for part of Bella's wedding gift and how to use it.

I showed the salesman the simple chain link, white gold bracelet with six diamonds set into the bracelet in equal intervals. As soon as he pulled it from the display case, I took the delicate bracelet in my hands and could actually picture it threaded through Bella's wedding ring when we got back to LA so that no one would notice a second band on her finger when she was out.

I had him gift wrap it and bought a knotted, black leather rope necklace for myself, so that I could keep my wedding ring on me at all times, but hide it from view.

I got back to the bridal shop and stood just outside the door, swinging the shopping bag in my hand and watching everyone walk by. Occasionally, someone would glance over at me and do a double take or gape, but no one bothered me or asked why I was standing outside a bridal shop.

Something that would never happen back home.

I was so bloody tired of secrecy and planning every small detail before I did anything. My life lacked spontaneity; this trip to Paris was the only spur of the moment thing I could remember doing in years. I couldn't make one move without wondering if my actions would somehow impact Bella or my family, and I was suddenly ready for retirement more than I'd ever been before.

When I'd first chosen to retire, it had been something to help calm Bella's fears. I was content with my life and hadn't really wanted to change anything but was willing to do so in order to be with Bella, because I knew that she was more important to me than acting could ever be. But now, I was nearly desperate for that stymied lifestyle. Having to try to keep my life with Bella private would soon become daunting, and I could actually see all the time spent away from her filming and promoting as something that could tear us apart.

It wasn't until I heard Bella clear her throat beside me that I realized she'd come out of the shop carrying a small bag.

"I found one. They have to hem it for me so I don't trip and fall on my face. She said it would only take a couple of hours." She glanced down at my hands. "What are you doing out here?"

"Thinking."

"About what?" she asked as she wrapped her arms around my neck.

"Retiring," I replied honestly. "It can't come soon enough."

She hummed in agreement.

I placed a quick kiss on her lips. "I was thinking we could go back to the hotel and write our vows while we're waiting for our alterations to be finished."

"What?" she shrieked. "Edward, I'm not writing vows. I wouldn't even know where to start."

I was a little taken aback by her reaction. "You do so well in your writing composition class. Of course you'd know where to start."

She shook her head and frowned. "No, I wouldn't. That's different. I get a sentence of direction, an idea of what the professor is looking for in the story and its requirements, but I get free reign of what I say. Something like this should be perfect, beautiful, and elegant. I look at you and I lose every way to articulate how you make me feel. I can't do it."

"Then don't. We can say the boring vows the priest gives us."

She groaned. "No. God damn it, I'll try. If I can't come up with anything, we'll fall back on the 'boring' vows."

I tried not to let her see how adorable I thought she was being, but a smile still tugged at my lips. "You don't have to try a thing. I'm perfectly content to say 'With this ring, I thee wed' as long as the result is the same. What would you like to do while we wait for our alterations to be finished?"

"Do we have time to go to the Louvre before they close?" she asked with a hopeful expression.

I glanced down at my watch and shook my head regretfully, thankful that we honestly didn't have enough time to see everything before they "closed".

"No, I'm sorry, we don't."

Her face fell and a sting of regret shot through me. "That's okay," she whispered.

It was clearly not "okay", but there was nothing to be done about it. Not at this very moment, at least.

* * *

I stood on the Pont des Arts, glancing around and smiling at the twinkling lights on the Seine. It was incredibly peaceful and quiet; the sounds of the city were audible in the distance, and the gentle, calming sound of the river hitting the bridge was in the forefront. I'd worked to have the entire bridge closed off for this occasion, and after two days of wheedling and pleading, I was finally granted an hour. It hadn't been the smallest task, but it was worth every ounce of frustration if it meant that our wedding was kept a secret and had the romantic atmosphere I was hoping for. The last thing we wanted was a growing crowd as we said our vows.

The sun was setting; there was still enough light to see some of the most impressive monuments Paris had to offer. The Institute of France was situated to my side and the Louvre was across it on the opposite bank, and Ile de la Cité posed as our backdrop with a glimpse of Notre-Dame towering above the buildings around it. Wrought iron candelabras lit up the small area we'd delegated for the ceremony and garlands of gardenias hung on the guardrails behind me, with their scent lingering in the air.

I stood with the priest that had somehow—incredibly—agreed to marry us and waited anxiously for Bella. There were no nerves, no cold washes of fear, only the anticipation of the minutes to come and the moment I laid eyes on my bride.

I wished my family could be here, but it just wasn't possible. I wondered what Bella would think of the idea of a marriage blessing this summer in Carlisle and Esme's garden to say our vows all over again with our family witnessing. I'd love to have a wedding party standing with us while I repeated everything I was about to say to Bella, only not with the promise to begin our lives together but the promise to continue to love, honor, cherish, and be with her for the rest of my days.

Through it all.

Time spun out as I caught sight of Bella walking toward me carrying a bouquet of white tulips wrapped with black ribbon at her side. She had on the coat we'd bought together as soon as we arrived in Paris, and her hair was up in these large, elegant knots, pinned back from her face with crystals and flowers. Her alabaster skin was flushed from the cold and excitement, and her gorgeous, dark brown eyes held a silent joy that I felt swell up inside me and threaten to knock me off my feet.

She stopped short of where I stood and gave me a quick, sheepish wave, and I was helpless to stop the laughter at the typical Bella response to anything formal.

"Come here," I said, still laughing.

She closed the distance between us and took my outstretched hand with hers. "I'm here. All dressed up."

"You are." I played with one of the buttons on her coat. "Are you planning to keep this on all night, or do I get to see what's underneath?"

She held a finger away from her bouquet and started unbuttoning her coat. The coat fell away, exposing her strapless dress to me, and I lightly ran my finger over the bodice, memorizing every small detail; the way it draped across her chest, the horizontal pleats that started at the top and stopped at her hips, keeping the dress fitted to her lithe body, and the way it gathered at one of her thighs before billowing to the ground, giving it enough detail to not be plain but was still simple enough that Bella was comfortable in it.

She radiated a beauty that was astonishing. It shone in everything she did, everything she said, and managed to take my breath away each and every day—this moment being no exception. I literally felt as if I couldn't breathe in her presence, as if her loveliness was too much for my body to bear.

It was a feeling I could never grow tired of.

"It's cold. I guess I can take it off for the ceremony." She grinned. "I didn't really think that part through when I was buying all this shit today."

I stared at her for a moment and decided that this—the imperfection of the coat lying atop her wedding dress—was ideal.

"Leave it. You look incredible."

"Yeah?"

I nodded. "I am a lucky, lucky man."

She smiled shyly, and her cheeks reddened further with my compliment. "Thank you. You don't look half bad yourself. Almost good enough to eat."

I shrugged and brought her closer to me. "We have all night."

She adjusted my tie, causing the soft pedals of the tulips to brush against my chin. "Yes, we do."

I reached into my pocket and pulled out the red Cartier box that held her bracelet.

"What's this?" she asked, furrowing her brows.

"Your wedding gift."

She lifted the lid and gasped quietly. "It's so pretty."

"I thought when we get home you could wear your wedding ring on it, so we don't cause a commotion. With the exception of you moving in, that is." I stared at her nervously, waiting to see if she liked my idea or not.

She pulled it out of the box and slipped it on her wrist with my help.

"It's such a good idea. What are you going to do with yours?"

I pulled out the leather necklace from under my shirt and let her examine it.

"This is so fucking hot," she breathed, licking her lips as she stared at the necklace. "And so unlike you."

A sparkle around her neck suddenly caught my eye. "Bella, love, why are you wearing a necklace that looks oddly like one my mother owns?"

Her hand jerked over to her neck, and she ran her fingers over the diamond necklace, flashing a charming smile. "Your mom has one?"

"She does."

"How 'bout that."

"Hmm," I replied disbelievingly. "How about it."

She straightened herself up and put my necklace back under my collar for me. "So I guess you want your present now, huh?" she asked coyly.

"That would be nice. Then we could get on with the purpose of all this before they open the bridge back up." I gestured broadly to the priest and the wedding planner waiting for us.

She brought her fingers to her mouth and whistled loudly, craning her neck to look behind us. "Here you go."

I blinked—hard—positive that what I was seeing wasn't real, like a mirage, but the image never wavered or faded. My family, along with Emmett, Rosalie, and Chief Swan, were actually walking toward us. Emotion surged through me as they neared, and as soon as Esme gave me that warm, welcoming smile of hers, I hugged Bella against me and tried not to make a fool out of myself already. It was a smile I'd wanted to receive from both my mothers on my wedding day; having the loss of one and the sudden surprise of the other was doing quite a number on my heart.

"Thank you," I said thickly.

"I did okay?" she asked uncertainly. "I didn't know what to get the man who has everything."

"You did more than okay. This means more to me than you could ever imagine, baby." My family was here. The one thing that could have made this night complete was given to me by Bella.

And I had a suspicion that Alice was involved, as well.

A smile of success lit up her face, and I didn't care about technicalities as I let my lips meet Bella's. The words "You may now kiss the bride" didn't need to be said for me to already feel married. I suddenly needed to hold her against me and feel her body melt into mine. She _knew_ me, in every sense of the word; something I hadn't realized I'd given up hope on until I saw her wide, innocent eyes staring back at me and her angelic voice—albeit cursing at Samson loudly—clearly for the first time.

A throat cleared behind Bella, and I immediately pulled away, glancing over at Charlie's frown.

"Excuse me," I muttered. Every time I saw this man, I was snogging his daughter. It was pathetic, really.

"Bella, I know you love him, but I'd appreciate it if you could stop making out in front of me," Charlie groaned.

"Oh, please, Dad," Bella replied, rolling her eyes. "That's probably going to be the theme of the evening since it's my wedding night and all. You're going to have to toughen up a little."

I let Bella speak with her father and grinned at my sister's attempt at innocence. "You little sneak," I said playfully. "I should throttle you for making me feel so guilty about this."

She giggled and jumped up to kiss my cheek. "Sorry, big brother, it had to be done. Bella would have never been able to surprise you with this if I hadn't played along."

"Thank you, Alice. I-"

She scrunched up her face. "Oh, stop. Go tell the priest we're ready. I want to see you get married now."

I didn't do exactly as she said; I greeted Carlisle, Esme, Jasper, Emmett, and Rosalie before standing with Bella in front of the priest. Bella opted not to have Charlie walk her to me since there really wasn't an actual aisle and since our wedding was anything but conventional. Alice snapped pictures, Rosalie held Bella's bouquet, and everyone gathered around to listen to the heavily accented words the priest had prepared for us.

The instant Bella began to recite her vows, her eyes brimmed with tears. She sniffled and she sobbed the words, all while I wiped away the tears that were falling down her cheeks, finding myself choked up with the amount of love emanating from her. It bled through her fingertips and touched the part of me that had lain dormant for so long. I could hear her devotion in her words and see the future in those beautiful eyes, humbling me—inspiring me to be a better man, to be deserving of the love she so freely gave me without any expectation or demands in return.

I'd waited so long for her; each year spent alone just made this moment sweeter.

I repeated the vows, and then slipped her ring on her finger, exchanging a giddy, overwhelmed grin with her that sealed the deal.

She was my wife.

I cupped her face and kissed her soundly, only releasing her because of the surprise I still had waiting for her.

Bella's breathing was heavy as she gazed up at me. "I love you, Mrs. Masen," I murmured, stroking her cheek with my thumb.

"I love you." She giggled as a snowflake fell on her cheek. "Snow. In Paris. How cliché."

I chuckled and stared up at the night sky with her. "Well, it can't be helped. Want the rest of your gift now, love?"

"There's more?"

"It's just over there," I said, pointing casually to my right.

"Edward. That's the Louvre."

"It is," I acknowledged. "And you have a private tour waiting for you."


	29. Chapter 29

**Nothing but smut and fluff. Honestly.**

**Thanks for the reviews and adds... Your love for the last chapter was amazing! And thanks for spreading the word on this little fic! I truly appreciate it! **

**With all the readalong stuff going on, I forgot to mention that the wonderful RoseArcadia made a blinkie for this! It's all E & B in the rain and so, so hot! You can get the link(s) on her blog, www(dot) RoseArcadia (dot) blogspot(dot) com.**

**Also, if you all ever have any questions, find me on Twitter... (at)JennyB0719. I'm much more accessable there than I am here. I'm so bad about responding to reviews! I figure, though, if I have free time, you all would rather I write than play, correct?**

**Thanks to Stratan for beta'ing this and being my hero :) **

**There's a comment Edward says about "football". For all you Americans, this actually means "soccer". Just so you know...**

**FANDOM GIVES BACK! I have a team! Team Jenny0719! It takes $5 to join and is for such a good cause! So if you want to see a team-picked outtake from TMWCBM, sign up! Links are on my blog www(dot) Jenny0719(dot) blogspot(dot) com or go directly to the Team's website. www(dot) fandomgivebackjenny0719(dot) blogspot(dot) com**

* * *

Chapter 29

**Edward**

Bella looked so completely befuddled, in awe that I'd been able to accomplish something like this. I stared down at her, memorizing the way her expression morphed into one of pure delight. The knowledge that I'd given her that joy with just a few simple words with the museum's curator, coupled with the sounds of our family and friends cheering the priest's announcement of our marriage in the background had my heart feeling as if it would implode at any given second.

It was unfathomable to me that this beautiful creature I'd encircled in my arms had love for me so strong that she'd willingly come to Paris to marry me, regardless of all the madness surrounding us and that it had been so quickly after we'd met. Now I was beginning to understand why Bella hadn't been able to believe it was truly happening. We'd been slung into this all-consuming, overwhelming relationship… one that had started from an instantaneous attraction and evolved into something more under the shroud of my "interest" in Tanya and the indifference I pretended to have toward Bella in public for so long. She'd captured my heart with her looks, her wit, her boldness, her cleverness, her independent mind, and strong-will.

Before I could blink, I loved her.

"No sooner looked but they loved," I murmured.

"What? Are you quoting Shakespeare to me?" she laughed.

I nodded. "It's appropriate." So very appropriate.

Her mouth twisted up with the denial that was quickly rising to the surface, but I stopped it with a brush of my thumb across her cheekbone, wiping the few stray snowflakes away from her eye.

"We should go before you're soaked," I whispered.

"Do I have time to go back to the room and change?"

"No need," I replied. "I've something waiting for you."

She shook her head. "Unbelievable. But what about everyone else?"

"All taken care of," Alice chimed in from behind us.

I chuckled. "Would you have guessed anything else?"

Bella giggled. "No. The two of you… Jesus. Is this what my life is going to be like from now on?"

"I'm not entirely sure what you mean."

"The grand gestures," she said with a wave of her hand in the general direction of the Louvre.

"It is. Is that a problem?"

"Does it matter?" she countered.

I smiled arrogantly. "Not at all."

We finally broke free from one another and paid our family attention, welcoming their words of congratulations with the smiles that seemed permanently etched on our faces.

After we helped disassemble the few sparse decorations we had surrounding us, we all walked across the bridge and through the courtyard, stopping to examine the pyramid. Bella made a quick pass around the pyramid, before ducking inside to the underground lobby with us, citing that walking around in a wedding dress with Edward Masen was a dead giveaway that something scandalous had just gone down.

I couldn't have agreed more.

Bella took the jeans and black cashmere jumper I'd had the wedding planner hold for her and, ignoring every one of Alice's protests, disappeared with our guide into one of the offices to change.

"I can't believe you didn't bring her a dress. It's her wedding night!" Alice laughed. "She's supposed to be gorgeous all night long."

"She will be. She always is."

Alice melted. "Aw, I love that you adore her. But you still should have brought her a dress."

I shrugged. "Bella wouldn't have been comfortable walking around here in a dress. You know that."

Esme came over and wrapped her arm around my waist. She leaned her head against my shoulder and sighed. "You're married."

A wide grin spread across my face, along with a warmth from her words. "I am. Thank you for being here."

Her free hand came up to wave me off. "As if I wouldn't. She looked beautiful, Edward. You both did, standing there together. But Bella, she glowed in that dress."

Her words caused something to stir inside me, and with a quick kiss to the top of my mother's head, I disentangled myself from her and sought out Bella. I needed to see her in her wedding dress one last time; to feel the smooth, white satin under my fingertips, and listen to the sound of it rustling as she moved.

I'd never have the chance again.

The guide was standing just outside a door in one of the many corridors of the palace, and with a nod of acknowledgement, I slipped past her and into the office.

Bella had her back to me, pulling the pins from her hair and rolling her shoulders. Her dress danced with her movements, giving me the satisfaction of hearing it skim across her body one last time.

I quietly came up behind her and started helping her take her hair down. She craned her neck to see me and smiled affectionately.

"Hey, you."

"Hey." My fingers brushed along the column of her neck as I went to put the crystal pin down on the table, and a heat came over me so swiftly, I lost my breath. All the anticipation, the wondering and waiting for this day—the day I could finally make love to Bella as her husband—was almost too much for me now.

My hands moved down her body, running over her breasts as they made their way to her hips. I moved my mouth to her shoulder and felt the shiver run through her as my tongue was met with the sweet taste of her supple skin.

Her head fell back, and she moaned quietly, her mewl causing desperation to streak through me. I fisted my hands at her hips, trying to restrain from ripping the fabric as I moved to ease this hunger drumming through me, but it was useless. The more I ravaged her with my mouth, the more the hunger grew.

'Excited' was too tame of a word. 'Passion' too simple. She managed to cause this indescribable reaction, this ache, in me every time we came together like no one else ever could or would again.

I unzipped her dress and managed to push it down carefully—without destroying it. She stepped out of it, spinning around to face me, and any words I'd thought about speaking had caught in my throat from her beauty.

Her thin, graceful form was only covered by a small sliver of white lace at her hips, and her white sandals were jeweled in pale blue at the top of her foot, making her petite legs look long and lean. A black and white garter sat on her thigh, and I hooked a finger around it to push it down while splaying my other hand at the small of her back so that I could bring her to me. I wanted to show her how much I treasured her, but that was impossible given the allotted time we had before someone came for us. It, unfortunately, would have to wait.

I dropped my head down to feel her lips against mine, and that desperation I'd felt seared our kiss. Bella hastily fought with my clothes, opting to finally just push my trousers down before shimmying out of her knickers. I broke the kiss as she ground her hips against mine, and dragged my mouth down her body until I could draw her breast into my mouth.

Her sharp gasp rocked me, and I lifted her up so that she was pinned against the wall and settled in between her thighs, marveling at how just the thought and the beginnings of foreplay could make her hot and ready for me.

"Baby," she moaned. "Please. Please fuck me."

I came undone, driving into her in one forceful push. She rolled her hips to meet my thrusts and tightened her legs around my waist as I took a handful of her hair and gently pulled her head back so that I could see her. Her eyes were scorching, intensifying every feeling racing through me.

Our movements became frenzied as we clawed at each other, attempting to somehow get even closer to one another, even though at this point—with our bodies joined and our glistening skin sliding together as we raced toward the finish—it was impossible.

She muffled her scream against my shoulder as she came, and after only a few thrusts, I followed her, bringing both of us down to the floor as I collapsed with exhaustion.

My breathing heavy, I placed my head on her chest and listened to the sound of her heart sprinting in my ear. Her fingers found purchase in my hair, lightly massaging my scalp and nearly causing me to fall asleep as we were.

I finally managed to lift my head, and I gave her a satisfied, crooked grin. "Not exactly how I'd planned to consummate our marriage."

Her nose scrunched up with her laugh. "What were you planning? Romantic seduction?"

"Something like that."

"No seduction necessary. I'm easy."

I laughed once and slowly stood up. "You'd better not be."

She frowned. "Edward, come on."

I pulled her up off the floor and onto her feet. "You cheat on me, I'll murder you," I said jokingly. Well, for the most part I was joking.

Her eyes flashed, and she fought with the grin that threatened to break across her face. "Same goes for you, big shot Hollywood actor."

I grinned wickedly. "As long as we're in agreement."

She turned away from me to start gathering her clothes. "We probably shouldn't have done that," she stated absently. "Really shouldn't have done that. What if that woman out there needed something and walked in? Or your family? My father? Emmett?" She shuddered on Emmett's name.

"They'd have heard your noises and turned away before ever walking through the door," I said unapologetically.

"_My_ noises?"

I nodded and threw her a quick grin. "_Your_ noises. You'd be very successful as a voice over for porn-style moans."

"You're so full of shit."

I reached out and slid my hand over her body, cupping her when I reached my destination. Her eyes fluttered, and she groaned breathlessly.

"That wasn't me."

"Fine," she pouted, a slight blush coloring her cheeks. "Good to know I have something to fall back on if… whatever the hell I decide to do after grad school doesn't work out."

"You've not decided anything yet?" I asked, buttoning my trousers back up.

"No," she sighed. "Pathetic, huh?"

"You've still time. There's no rush," I said comfortingly. "Or you could choose to do nothing at all. Stay at home with me."

She rolled her eyes. "Be serious. I can't sit and be idle all day. You know that."

I moved to help her take the rest of her hair down. "I know. You'll figure it out eventually, love."

A knock on the door pulled me out of the task of removing the thousands of black hairpins still in Bella's hair. I rushed to block the door, since Bella was still mostly naked, and found my sister standing on the other side with her hands on her hips. In the time I'd been in here with Bella, she'd managed to change into a pair of jeans and a vibrant, yellow shirt.

Which meant everyone else had, as well.

"We're all waiting for you. Stop shagging and come on," she complained impatiently.

"We're not shagging. Bella's taking her hair down," I growled. "Do you know how many sodding pins were in her hair?"

She giggled. "You may be doing that now, Edward, but you can't fool me. I can see it on your face. You two were… you know. It says so right here." She stretched up to run her finger along the width of my forehead. "'Just fucked'."

"She's my wife. I'm expected to try to keep my hands off my wife on my wedding day? I find that demand slightly unattainable."

"You're expected to share her with the rest of your selfish family until the two of you are _alone_. Then you have your wedding day sex. Surely you can keep it zipped up for a few hours, brother."

If she wasn't smiling that blinding smile of hers, I might've slapped her. "Go away, tiny person, before I step on you. I'll see you as soon as Bella's finished."

Her mouth dropped open. "I'm not _that_ tiny."

I simply gave her a disbelieving look from her attempt to lie and shut the door. "We need to hurry," I said to Bella. "If we don't, we may wind up barricading the door against the angry mob of family members."

"So I heard." She shook her hair out and ran her fingers through it once. "I think I got them all. Let me just throw on my clothes, and I'm good to go."

Bella opened the door and asked the guide if she could keep her dress in the office while we toured the museum, and she fidgeted a little when the woman laughed and made a comment about "insatiable newlyweds" in her thickly accented English. I, on the other hand, shrugged unapologetically. It seemed to be the theme of the evening. It was my wedding night, and as the groom, I was privileged to do what I bloody pleased.

We met back up with everyone in the lobby, and I hung back with Carlisle while Esme, Alice, and Rosalie stole Bella. We toured through the first floor of the Richelieu wing and rounded past the crown jewels. Emmett, of course, couldn't resist saying something when he saw Bella's stupefied reaction as she stared at the Regent Diamond.

"Shut your dick smackers and move along, Swan," he boomed.

"God damn it, Emmett," she muttered. She snuck a glance at our guide who had what could only be described as a look of disgusted bafflement and flushed from head to toe.

"Allow me," Rosalie said smugly, stepping over to Emmett and slapping him across the back of his head. Hard. So hard, Jasper and I visibly winced.

"Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, did you see that?" Jasper mumbled to me.

"Yes."

"Christ, that chick is fucking scary. Like in a supermodel-hot-I'll-tear-your-balls-off-and-pierce-your-spleen-with-my-stiletto kind of way."

"At times," I chuckled.

"Ow, baby," Emmett groaned, rubbing the back of his head. "Come on. I was just giving Bella a hard time."

"This is her day. Don't be an idiot on her day."

We continued on, and I watched Bella's reaction closely as we walked toward the Mona Lisa. Hearing her gasp and seeing her enraptured by the guide's brief speech about the painting itself had my heart threatening to implode all over again.

"So… Feel any different now that you're married?" Charlie asked me.

I thought about it. "No. Happier, I suppose."

"I have to say, it's very weird knowing my son-in-law is only three years younger than me."

"It is a bit odd," I admitted carefully, wondering where this conversation was headed.

"I talked to Bella before the wedding," he continued.

I didn't bother to hide my shock. "Oh?"

"I wanted to make sure this wasn't some kind of whim she'd regret later on in life. I was hoping she'd have a long engagement. She's so… young. I wanted to make sure that some charismatic actor who's used to getting whatever he wants wasn't pressuring her into something she wasn't ready for."

I kept my expression stoic, making sure I hid what I was feeling over his obviously low opinion of me. It wasn't like it could be helped; I'd only spoken to the man three times.

"A very clever whim, if I say so myself," Carlisle answered for me. "Given his extremely public lifestyle. We've had some close calls with journalists finding out who we really are to Edward in the past. He's always managed to out maneuver them and draw their attention elsewhere."

"That's what Bella said to me; that it was smart given his lack of privacy. And that she could have waited a year and still felt the same about him. So it didn't really matter and I should 'fuck off'."

I chuckled. "Not surprising, really."

"No. And I did, because the two of you _fit_. This," he said in reference to the Louvre, "wouldn't have been considered by anyone else as a gift. I, myself, would have just brought her during public hours. I'd have never thought to arrange something this extravagant for her, and I'm her damn father. You're in tune with each other in a way that I didn't know was possible. More so now than you were on Thanksgiving."

I cleared my throat and caught Carlisle's proud smile out of the corner of my eye. I felt like such a child all of the sudden. "Thank you."

He shifted on his feet, clearly showing his discomfort. "Promise me she'll come and visit. I don't see her nearly enough as it is, and that's partly—mostly—my fault. I know with your… job, you're busy-"

"Of course," I interjected. "You've been the one constant in Bella's life. I wouldn't dream of taking that away from her, or you, for that matter."

He let out a breath of relief. "Okay."

"Shall we interrupt the girls and see the painting?"

Charlie nodded and smiled a little. "It's not every day I get to stand in front of the world's most famous painting."

"It most certainly is not," I agreed.

After we finished our tour of the Louvre, we opted to finish our celebration with everyone in the hotel bar in an effort to keep the secrecy of the evening preserved. I knew none of the staff would contact the press for fear of losing their job, and I was fairly certain that the other guests wouldn't be a problem, either. Most of them were either too drunk to pay us any mind or already in their rooms.

Thankfully.

We'd broken off into smaller groups as soon as we'd walked in the door. Charlie chatted up the bartender while watching a football game that had taken place between Internazionale and Barcelona earlier today, even though I was positive he didn't care about any kind of football except American football. Emmett and Rosalie were snuggled up together, talking to my parents about London. Emmett made some lewd comment, and Esme fluttered her hands a little before regaining her composure and retorting with something that had even Emmett flushing.

I laughed.

Now that Alice had Bella to herself, she spent her time catching up with Bella a little and ignoring me entirely. Which was no matter. I was content to sip my water and watch everyone around me.

Jasper walked to the bar to get Alice another drink, and an extremely curvy woman with blond hair came over and started flirting with him. Jasper smiled politely at her, nodding slightly at something she said, and I glanced over at Alice and Bella to gauge their reactions. Alice was unconcerned; Bella seemed absolutely fascinated.

"You're not worried about that girl over there eye-fucking Jasper?" Bella suddenly asked Alice.

"Who? The blond?" Bella nodded. "No. She's not Jasper's type. I am."

"Well, no shit. But still, I get really aggravated when girls walk up to Edward like I'm not even there. And we're married for Christ's sake!" She held up her hand and wiggled her fingers, flashing her ring.

"No one knows you're married," Alice pointed out.

"Whatever. Engaged. Same difference. Either way, he's off the market."

I leaned over and placed a kiss just behind her ear. "Don't be mad, love. It's part of the job. You know I can't help it. I mean, it's not like I deliberately tell random girls to walk over and try to get into my trousers."

She pinched me playfully in return. "You be quiet. I was talking to your sister."

I held my hands up in surrender and grinned crookedly. "Fine. I'll stay on my side and drink my water."

"You do that, baby." She turned back to Alice. "So it doesn't bother you?"

"Of course not. I know who he comes home to every night. It would do you good to remember the same. My brother's not going anywhere."

"Can I interrupt?" I asked.

I simply ignored the dirty look Bella gave me and spoke, regardless of its welcome.

"She's right. You've ruined me for all the other women in the world. I can never look at another woman again because I will only ever see you."

"Aw, that was sweet, Edward," Alice crooned.

Bella pursed her lips. "It really was," she said reluctantly. "Thank you."

"Worthy of a kiss?"

Bella bit her lip and nodded. I brought my hand to the back of her neck and forced her to me while I took her mouth in a bruising kiss. Cheers and cat-calls—mostly from Emmett—echoed around us, and Bella jerked back, cursing under her breath and blushing in response.

"I thought you'd gotten over letting other people's reactions to us bother you," I murmured in her ear.

"I did," she groaned. "But Jesus, that was a little over the top, don't you think?"

"My kiss? Or Emmett's cheers?"

"Both."

I smiled warmly at her. "A bit."

Jasper slammed himself into his chair with a huff. "Why do I attract all the girls that wear dunlap jeans?"

Alice giggled.

Bella looked at me curiously, and I merely shrugged. I had no idea what he was talking about either.

"What are dunlap jeans?" Bella asked.

"You know. Dunlap jeans." We both stared at him blankly. "Because her stomach done lapped over her jeans?"

Bella snorted a laugh. "Where do you come up with this shit?"

Jasper flashed a cocky smile. "It's a gift."

I glanced at the drink in Bella's hands and noticed it was finally empty. I pointed toward the drink, and she shook her head, bringing her hand over to my leg and slowly moving it up…

It was time to leave.

"I think we're going to call it a night," I announced, moving out of my chair and giving Bella my hand to help her up.

"Edward," Alice whined. "It's only…" She glanced around for a clock.

"Two in the morning," I finished for her.

Alice frowned. "Oh."

We said our goodbyes and made sure everyone called us when they arrived back at their respective homes and finally made our way back to the suite. The moment I had the door unlocked, I scooped Bella up and kicked the door open.

She squealed. "Edward! Damn it! Put me down!"

I carried her, protesting and all, into the room before I finally set her down. "There. You're down."

"God, you're such a pain in the ass." My laughter died in my throat when she pushed me into the wall and nearly attacked me with her mouth. "But, I'm so fucking glad we're alone."

"Earlier wasn't enough for you, baby?" I rasped out.

"Nope. Not even close."

"Good to know."

She pushed her hands down my trousers, and I immediately moved away from her and captured her wrists. "Wait," I breathed. "Slow it down."

She pouted. "Why?"

"Because I rushed through it earlier. I want it to be right this time."

"Edward, it's right every time because it's you," she said shyly.

And how was I to argue with that logic?

I couldn't.

"All right, dance with me first."

"You want to dance?"

"I want to dance. It's tradition, is it not?" I asked with a crooked grin.

She laughed and shook her head. "I guess."

I wrapped my arms around her waist and began to move with her.

After a few seconds, she tightened her hands around my neck and giggled. "Baby? Where's the music?"

"No music. Just you and me," I murmured.

She smiled broadly through the biting of her lip and pulled my face down so that it was resting against hers. Her lashes brushed my cheek as she closed her eyes, and I couldn't stop myself from breathing her in as I moved us at an excruciatingly slow pace. In all the years I'd been in the spotlight, I'd never given my heart to someone so entirely before, and with Bella, it had been effortless. I realized I'd played every relationship safe, keeping my heart and career protected, until now. It could all end tomorrow, but standing here with Bella like this would be worth every second of pain. I'd throw everything I'd worked my entire life for just to continue to be with her.

She was the exception.

* * *

**Bella**

"Jesus, Edward! What did you do, buy a house in the middle of nowhere? We're never going to get there!"

Edward chuckled and pulled me into his side. "It's not in the middle of nowhere. It's in Villefranche."

I looked at him blankly. Again, the need for a world geography class reared its ugly head. "Um…"

"Villefranche-sur-Mer," he specified. "French Riviera. It's a short train ride from Cannes. I liked the availability of the house when coming to the film festival without being centered in all of the chaos."

"Oh. Okay." I snuggled up next to him. "So what are we going to do?"

"Stay in bed."

I snorted. "Fuck all day and night?"

"I really don't think I could handle that," he said thoughtfully.

"No?" I laughed. "Really? No?"

"No." He smiled ruefully down at me. "Is my wife going to try to break my favorite body part while on our honeymoon?"

I shook my head. "It's my favorite, too."

He cocked a brow in question.

"Well, it's my second favorite," I amended. "Your eyes are what drew me in. The dick is just bonus."

He burst into laughter, making me blush. The perfect, green eyes I loved so much were luminous against the dark train cabin as they scanned my face. He was just as happy—as in love with me and the moment—as I was with him. His head dropped down so that he could kiss me, and my heart physically hurt from the strength of the feelings I had for him.

He gently laid me against the window, cradling my face as his mouth continued to move with mine. The quiet clanking of the rails and the train's easy rocking as we moved down the track reminded me that we were in a public venue, but even that knowledge couldn't stop the sudden need I had for the man hovering over me.

He hitched my leg around his hip, allowing the friction I so desperately needed, and I moaned into his mouth. He lifted his head to stare down at me, so serious and inquiring, and I brought his hand to my breast to answer his unspoken question.

He rose back up, bringing me with him and sat me on his lap. One hand stretched out to lock the cabin door while his teeth nipped my neck. The new sensation coursed through me, and I grabbed the long-sleeved tee and yanked it over his head. I no longer cared about myself; I was solely focused on him and showing him how much he meant to me by any means I could.

I made my way down his body, feeling his chorded muscles tense and twitch under the skin with my hands and my mouth. I got to the waist of his jeans and smirked at the growl that came from his chest when I popped the button open and unzipped them. He raised his hips so that I could pull everything away from his body and hissed as soon as I took him into my mouth.

His head fell back against the seat when I sucked down on him, and I had to hold back the giggle that tried to escape my throat with the reaction he had each time I did so. It was so empowering to have this influential man—the man that dominated a room with his smile—so helpless with my touch and a simple act of sex.

His hips bucked, and he gripped onto my shoulders tightly. "Stop," he ground out.

I glanced up and saw his jaw tighten and his eyes blaze as he held off his orgasm. One last lick and I released him. "How come?"

He pulled me up to his chest and deftly removed my jeans and panties. "I want this," he said thickly, sliding his fingers over me with a seductive smile. "And it seems you want me, as well."

"When do I not?" I countered slyly.

He laughed once and pressed a soft kiss to my lips. "I do love you, Isabella."

I let him remove my shirt, reveling in the way his skin felt against mine. "I love you," I replied, though I knew those three words would never be enough to fully explain how I felt for him.

"Now, turn around and straddle me," he instructed.

I did as I was told and looked over my shoulder to see him. With a quick flick of his wrist, he had my bra unfastened and was running his hands down my back as it fell off my shoulders. He cupped my ass and lifted me up and guided me down on him.

As soon as he was fully inside me, my back arched against his chest, because it just felt so fucking good. He moved me fluidly on top of him until we found our rhythm, and then those graceful, skilled hands of his were everywhere, rolling my nipples and skimming over my clit.

Without warning, he pushed my hair to one side and bit down at the juncture of my neck and shoulder. The sharp streak of pain and the surprise had me coming almost immediately. I twisted my torso and buried my face in Edward's neck so that I didn't make too much noise and heard his low grunt with his own climax.

He wrapped his arms around me, bringing me closer to him, and placing a reverent kiss where he'd just bitten down. "You all right?" he whispered.

I nodded. "Feel free to try that again any time."

I could feel his smile against my shoulder. "I'll be sure to keep that in mind." His finger caught on the corner of the patch at my hip as he moved his hands to a different position. "You should take this off."

I laughed. Loudly. "We've been married for a day and you're already telling me to take off my patch?"

"I don't mean it like you think, love. It's annoying. You could try something else."

I laughed some more. "God, you're cute."

"So I take it that's a 'no'?"

I carefully turned around so that I was facing him. "That's a 'no'."

He chuckled and shrugged. "Can't blame me for trying. But if you get any more hormonal, I'm ripping it off in your sleep."

"Am I that bad?"

He shook his head and pushed my hair behind my ears. "Not particularly. Just a bit weepy since… well, since we did that interview."

"I'm overwhelmed," I answered quietly.

"I know. And for that, I'm sorry."

"Oh, an apology. An actual, verbal apology. You never give me those," I said playfully.

"Because I never do anything wrong. I'm a phenomenal human being." He flashed a cocky, crooked smile.

I kissed his cheek and moved off his lap so that I could get dressed. "Liar."

The train pulled into the station, and Edward and I quickly removed our belongings and found the car waiting for us before anyone recognized him. The distance to Edward's house was short, but the amount of twists and turns necessary to drive around the cliffs seemed to make it last forever.

We finally pulled up to this massive, tan colored stucco house built into the mountain. The clay tile roof was in perfect condition. Black shutters framed every window, and elaborate concrete railings lined the terraces. The garage was under the house, nestled inside the stoned foundation, and the door opened, revealing a dark blue BMW coupe.

I should've known.

Edward helped me out of the car and gave the driver a tip as he helped him get our luggage out of the trunk. I stood there, completely useless, and just stared at the flawlessness before me. Not only was the house unbelievable, but the view was incredible as well. From the spot I stood rooted to, I could see the Mediterranean stretch out before me for miles, curving against the sky with the earth. Houses and apartments scattered the mountainside, and people dotted the harbor below, bundled in their coats while they worked the boats.

"It's actually quite drab at the moment," Edward whispered in my ear as the driver pulled away. "There are three months of 'winter' here. Otherwise, there are shrubs that are in full bloom beside the palms. You can see sailboats anchored out in the sea from the pool and purple flowers actually grow out of the stones here," he said as he pointed to the right of the garage door, "as well as the back side of the house. They make the house visible from the beach."

"How many more of these mansions do you own?"

Edward spun me around and frowned disapprovingly. "I've only the houses in LA, here, and London. The family shares the Kent house. And they're not _my_ houses, Bella, they're _our_ houses now."

He was right. This was my life now. Might as well get used to it.

"Sorry. All this money is so damn hard to comprehend." I looked at him pleadingly. "You know?"

His frown deepened. "Not exactly. My mother and father were well off by the time I was old enough to understand how much I couldn't really purchase with five quid. Carlisle and Esme both make a respectable amount of money, so I never witnessed what it was like to struggle making the mortgage or putting food on the table. I was extremely fortunate. I still am."

"Must be nice," I sighed. "There were a few times I can remember having to eat Spaghetti-O's and Ramen for months on end so that we weren't evicted and we didn't die of heat stroke in the middle of the summer." Because my mother wouldn't hold a job long enough to provide for herself or her child.

I'll give him this; he refrained from that pitying look so many others would have given me. "Well, how about this…"

He pulled out his checkbook from the front of his leather bag and proceeded to write a check before handing it to me. I read my name and the amount and nearly choked on my tongue.

"What's this for?"

"It's your earnings for renegotiating my contract," he explained. "That ought to even things out a bit."

I think I started hyperventilating because the next thing I knew, I was bent over and Edward was crouched in front of me, his worried looks of concern barely registering through my oxygen-deprived haze.

"Oh my God," I finally gasped. "That's a lot of zeros." I'd done the math before, but seeing it written out on an actual check was too much for my tiny brain to handle.

Edward's hands ran over my face frantically. "Are you all right?"

I nodded and gulped.

"Remind me to never write you any check other than your paycheck again. I thought I was going to have to take you to the bloody emergency room," he snarled.

I nodded again and slowly stood up, slipping the check into my pocket.

"Show me the house so I can have some kind of distraction from the weight of this check on my leg."

Edward laughed in relief. "You're being absurd. It's paper. Meaningless."

"I've never had a check this 'meaningless' before, so you'll have to excuse me," I retorted as he led me into the house.

I took off my coat and started to walk into the white foyer but was stopped by Edward's hand lightly catching my forearm. His thumb ran over my skin, sending tingles down to my hand, and he smiled at me sincerely. "You earned it. Don't forget that, Bella."

"I'll try," I promised.

He sat our luggage down, and he held out his hand to me. "Ready for your tour?"

I grinned. "Finding something like the bathroom is extremely important."

His face brightened with the prospect of showing off the house. "So it is."

He ran through the house with me, making sure I knew where everything I could possibly want was in every pristinely decorated room. It reminded me so much of Edward's house back in LA, but without the color. Everything was white on white, in an effort—according to Edward—to showcase the blues of the sea and the oranges and pinks of the sunset. Or so his decorator had told him.

And I had to admit, as I sat on the window seat in the master bedroom watching the glistening, turquoise water foam behind a boat that moved through the harbor, it somehow looked even better from inside the house.

"Love?" Edward peered out from behind the bathroom door. He'd taken his shirt off and looked damn near edible. "Care for a shower before we scrounge up some dinner?"

I smiled as I realized that the peaceful, sublime feeling that came with the view had nothing to do with the way the house was decorated or even the landscape itself and everything to do with the man standing before me.

A shower sounded like fucking heaven right now. "No funny business," I said with narrowed eyes.

He laughed. "I've all weekend for that. I only want to get all this travel grime off me."

We showered and dressed, and then got in the BMW and drove to a little grocery store down the street to pick up everything we'd need over the weekend. As soon as we got back to the house and everything was unpacked and put in its appropriate place, I shoved Edward out of the kitchen.

"You've spoiled me rotten since the day I met you. Let me do something for a change," I said when I was met with his resistance. "Please?" I added for good measure. "It's your honeymoon, too."

He grumbled something under his breath and nodded, leaving me to make dinner for us myself.

I pulled the shrimp out of the fridge and peeled the shells off of them before I set a pot of water on to boil. I cut up asparagus, red onions, and green peppers while working on a lemon butter sauce. I sautéed everything with cherry tomatoes and served it over angel hair pasta, along with a salad and a garlic loaf.

Totally worth every second to see Edward's reaction when he stepped back into the kitchen.

"What do you think?"

"I think you put in a lot of effort," he said as he poured the white wine.

"You've made every second of this trip special for me. I wanted to do something in return. Other than anything involving books, this is the only thing I'm good at."

He waggled his eyebrows suggestively. "That's not all, baby."

"Ha. Ha."

Edward forked a piece of shrimp out of his plate and held it up for me to try. "Tell me something about your childhood that I don't already know. Anything at all," he said as I chewed.

I sipped my wine and tried to sort through my memories and could only come up with the ones I didn't want to spoil the mood with. "Why?"

He shrugged. "No particular reason. I suppose you telling me about Spaghetti-O's and Ramen earlier reminded me that there's still quite a bit I don't know about you."

"And yet here we are… married," I joked.

He rolled his eyes. "I know enough to know that nothing you could say would make me fall out of love with you. I just don't know all the details of your life yet."

"Well, I guess it's a good thing we have the rest of our lives," I said with a cheesy smile.

"Corny, Bella."

"That was the point."

"So?" He gazed across the table expectantly.

I closed my eyes and searched for one thing good in the midst of all the bad. "Okay, I thought of something that happened at Charlie's that's kind of funny. I didn't have a lot of friends in Forks, but there was this summer I played with the girl that lived down the road." I stopped, trying to remember her name but couldn't. "Anyway, we put on this play for our dads-"

"You put on a play?" Edward asked in disbelief.

"Yes, I know. Very unlike me." I grinned. "We had this ridiculous scene all thought out and worked hours on the dialogue. We got dressed up and used Charlie's deck as our stage while Charlie and her dad sat in chairs in the grass.

"I got halfway through this monologue that I'd worked my ass off memorizing when I suddenly felt something literally plop down on my head from the sky."

"A bird? Some sort of tree nut from an annoyed squirrel?"

I giggled. "No, not exactly. More like bird shit."

Edward put his fist up to his mouth and laughed. "You had a bird shit on your head? How old were you?"

"Eight? Nine, maybe? At least, we're pretty sure it was a bird. There are so many little creatures in those trees, there's no telling."

Edward laughed some more. "What did you do?"

"I did what any respectable girl would do. I screamed and cried to Charlie."

"That's what I want for us," he said determinately. "I want a normal life. I want our kids to run screaming to me when a bird decides they've had enough of their hideous acting and shits on them and only my words and comfort will make them feel better."

"So do I. I only wish I'd have had more of that growing up," I said sadly.

"You can make up for it with our family, Bella."

We finished the entire bottle of wine and eventually cleaned up the kitchen before we watched a movie in bed. When the movie was over, we made love one last time and then fell asleep in each other's arms.

And that was basically the extent of our weekend together. Edward made good on his promise; we slept in and made love and were content to just be together without anything on the agenda to interrupt us or cameras flashing in our faces.

It was perfect. At least, until I'd gotten too much rest and found myself lying wide awake in the middle of the night, glancing around the blackened bedroom.

I stretched and moved closer to Edward's side of the bed, hoping that the steady beat of his heart and the sound of his breathing next to my ear would lull me back to sleep. Instead of lying down immediately, I propped myself up on my elbow and stared down at him, wondering how many true vacation days he'd ever had in his life. Even when he wasn't filming, he was still getting up early to work out, attending meetings and the occasional photo shoot, and giving interviews. His life had consisted of nothing but work, and while I admired his work ethic, I was so glad that he wouldn't be wearing himself out all the time anymore and he wanted that average, everyday life that I'd lived until recently.

I finally decided not to wake Edward and moved back to my side of the bed. I flopped down and stared up at the ceiling, huffing with frustration.

Edward's sleepy chuckle sounded beside me. "You want over here; just come on."

"I didn't want to wake you," I whispered, crawling over to his awaiting arms.

"But you did."

"Sorry."

He shrugged and kissed the tip of my nose. "Why are you awake at…?" He turned to see the time. "Oh, for pity's sake, it's four in the morning!"

"I can't sleep," I said sheepishly. "I've gotten too much sleep."

"I suppose that's a bit of a problem." He paused. "What do you want to do?"

"Nothing. You go back to sleep. I can get up and find a movie or something if I need to," I mumbled against his chest.

He sighed. "Get up. I'm not making you miserable so that I can get a three more hours of sleep."

"Edward-"

"Get up," he repeated with a laugh, sliding out from underneath me. "I already am."

I scrambled out of the bed and gave him a curious look. "What are we doing?"

He grinned. "You'll see."

He placed his hand at the small of my back and led me out of the bedroom and into what I considered to be the best room in the house—the sunroom. I loved being able to stare out at the water or up at the stars while sitting in the warmth of the fireplace that sat at the only solid wall. We walked toward the black baby grand piano sitting in the center of the room, and Edward motioned for me to sit down. I warily sat down, stealing glances out at the moonlit harbor as Edward scooted in behind me.

"Um, I thought I wasn't allowed near a piano with you anymore."

Edward laughed. "I thought if I engaged your mind, you couldn't assault me like you did before."

"I think it was the other way around, baby."

Edward placed a kiss to my hair and brought my hands to the keys. "I'm fairly certain you were the one who initiated the attack when you got down under the piano while I played for you."

I smiled with the memory. "Oh, right."

"Now, this is Middle C," he said, placing my thumbs on an ivory key in the center of the piano. "Press it."

I did as he said and grinned as the note played. "Now what?" I asked eagerly.

"There are only seven letters you need to remember. C, D, E, F, G, A, and B—in that order." He moved his long fingers over the keys, showing me each one. "This," he said in reference to a key to my right, "is C again."

"It repeats?"

He nodded. "Each note can be found multiple times on the keyboard." He demonstrated by pressing all the C's on the piano. "Hear how they all have the same pitch and are merely lower or higher on the scale than others?"

"Yeah."

"Good. That's called an 'octave range'. Each time the notes repeat, they're considered in a different octave than the last."

"Okay."

"Those octaves consist of eight notes."

"Like this?" I choppily played the eight notes in front of me, starting with Middle C and ending with the C that began the next octave. "Would that be an octave?"

"Exactly," he said, a smile playing at his lips. "That's also a C scale. Next time, though, reach your thumb behind your hand for a smoother transition when you've run out of fingers to play the notes."

I repeated the scale, doing what he said and was stopped when Edward's hands snuck around my waist and in between my thighs.

"Hey! You started this, now finish it," I admonished.

"All right," he chuckled, his hands retreating back to our sides.

He continued the lesson, explaining to me that the black keys were the sharps and flats of the notes beside them. Depending on whether you went up or down determined whether the note was flat or sharp, along with which "key" (I had no clue what that meant) the piece was written in. I thought this was entirely too fascinating for my own good. Each little black key had two different note names. The specific key we were focusing on could either be G flat or F sharp.

No wonder Edward loved playing so much. It was like a puzzle that played beautiful music as soon as you solved it.

He had me running through the C scale again—this time with both hands, as awkward as it was for me—and then changed the key to B flat, reminding me to play the B flat key and the E flat key. I started with the little black note I'd remembered as B flat and raced through the scale, hitting a sour note when I forgot about that damn E flat.

"Whoops."

"Try it again."

When I had the basics of the piano itself figured out, Edward reached over and pulled out an old, worn book from the black wooden bin that was underneath the piano and sat it on the little stand.

I blinked at the tiny notes dancing over the page. "This is nothing but gibberish to me."

Edward laughed. "It's very simple. It's one of the books I learned on."

I only looked at him incredulously.

Edward patiently showed me how to match up the keys on the piano with the notes on the pages and explained a whole hell of a lot more, like about certain notes having so many beats in each measure and that the numbers at the beginning of the song told you how to time your counts.

Or whatever the fuck it was.

"Don't bother with beats, measures, or time. If you want, I can teach you more of that technical rubbish later. Just play the song as you know it," he said lowly. His finger grazed down my spine and dipped under my panties, teasing the sensitive flesh there.

I wiggled my ass, partially turned on and partially annoyed. "You'd better quit," I warned.

He kissed my shoulder and removed his finger.

I hesitantly put my hands into position and took a deep breath. I played tediously; there were unnecessary breaks in between notes as I struggled to remember everything I'd learned, but damn it, there was no doubt about what song it was.

"I just played _London Bridge_!" I exclaimed.

"You're a natural," he said proudly.

I snorted. "Hardly."

"You are," he argued. "It takes most people weeks of lessons to figure out as much as you did in a span of only hours."

I let my head rest against his shoulder. "Thank you."

He ran his hands over my arms soothingly. "You're welcome."

"You know you're never going to get a chance to play your piano back home now, right?"

"We can always purchase another," he said sensibly.

Of course we could.

"And put it _where_?"

"Not quite sure," he replied. "I could possibly put it where that dreadful pool table is."

I snickered. "Jasper would kick your ass."

The sun was peeking out over the horizon, casting blues and purples all around us. We watched it come up for a bit before Edward shifted us so that he could kiss me.

He pulled back with heavy eyes. "Want to defile this piano, as well?"

"Can we?"

"By God, I think we can, Mrs. Masen," he replied in perfect Scottish brogue, succeeding in his attempt to be goofy and making me laugh.

"I love the way your laugh sounds," he whispered.

"So you've said."


	30. Chapter 30

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Chapter 30

**Edward**

Bella and I quickly removed our wedding bands from our fingers as the plane slowly rolled toward the jetway at LAX. I fiddled with mine for a bit, wishing I could keep it on, but knew that it simply wasn't an option if I wanted Bella to remain as unaffected by my fame as possible. I had always loved to act, but now I was finding that each day brought more and more resentment over the career path I'd stupidly chosen all those years ago. I knew it was irrational—after all, when I'd agreed to do that first film, I'd never dreamed that sixteen years later I'd have become this sort of… phenomenon, if that's what you'd call it—but I still felt it. I fervently wished that I'd stayed on the path of medicine so that I would have that quiet, average life I wanted to have with Bella.

But I suppose by doing so, I'd have never had the opportunity to meet the woman who was destined to be mine, so I immediately abandoned that line of thought. A life—however serene it may be—without Bella wasn't even worth aspiring for.

I discreetly slid my ring over the thin, black leather rope and clasped the necklace around my neck, shoving the ring under the collar of my rugby shirt and glancing around to make sure no one caught the movement.

It would have been terribly unfortunate to have come all this way and have the secret spoiled by some watchful fan on the plane.

Bella had her ring threaded through her bracelet and was in the middle of clasping it around her wrist when I reached out and caught the delicate chain between my fingers, stopping her movements.

Our eyes met, and we exchanged a look of sadness. That happily married bubble I'd been so excited to be inside was wobbling and threatening to pop with just a pin's prick. The moment we stepped off this plane, life would go back to the way it was before we left for France. Fans would obsess and speculate, paparazzi would follow and film, and no one would be the wiser to my vow to love, honor, and obey the woman I was lucky enough to have grace my doorstep that fateful morning last October.

I had to remind myself that this intense scrutiny we were constantly under couldn't last forever—it never did. The wretchedness Tanya had spewed after the ball had seriously damaged any chance of finding some kind of privacy in LA anytime soon. People were still wondering about our arrangement and talking about what they were "sure" had happened the night of the ball. What no one seemed to understand was that I was just as dumbfounded as they were. I'd never really gotten a believable answer from Tanya. The only thing that I'd been able to deduce from the entire situation was that she was even more selfish and manipulative than I'd imagined.

Not to mention toppling over the wrong edge of the insanity bridge.

I'd spent the entire flight talking and strategizing with Bella, making sure she knew that while I wanted nothing more than to announce our marriage to anyone who would listen, it was much, much wiser to play it safe, and stay under the radar and completely quiet. We'd cause enough of a commotion when we started moving Bella's belongings into the house tomorrow morning.

Reality called, and no matter how desperate I was to stay holed up with Bella at the Mediterranean villa, I knew I could be just as happy back here in LA with her. We simply needed to find a balance between that intensely private life we wanted and what awaited us when we exited customs.

And I had faith we could do it. We'd come this far, made it through all of Bella's insecurities and fears; we could handle this next bit, as well.

"Wrap the chain around your ring one last time so that it doesn't bring so much attention to itself by rolling around your wrist over and over again," I instructed quietly.

"Oh."

"It'll look like part of the clasp this way to anyone not up close," I continued.

She nodded and let her thumb trace over the diamonds for a second before stealing a glance at me.

I was watching her closely with a scowl. "We don't have to do this," I stated lowly. "You can tell everyone to 'fuck off' if you want. You're good at that sort of thing."

She grinned, but it was gone in an instant. "I want to."

I looked at her strangely, and she shook her head.

"I don't _want _to, but I know it's necessary if we want to have a minute alone outside of the house. It just feels like we're right back where we started.

I stared at her as my frustration consumed me. She was absolutely right. We were no closer to that happy ending than we were four months ago when we first met.

Her eyes darted to the lights lining the dark runway. "Forget I said it," she mumbled.

"No, it's true. We're right back at the beginning again, hiding from the fucking press," I said sharply.

"At least we don't have to hide how we feel, just the fact that we got married," she whispered. "There's no way I could pretend to not have feelings for you. Not again."

A smile ghosted across my face. "How so?" I asked, glancing around cautiously to make sure no one was eavesdropping.

"That distant, cold look that came over your face when we talked to each other in public would honest to God kill me now. I love how the way you look at me makes me feel."

"I look at you like that because you are the only thing I live for anymore," I said honestly. "You make me feel alive, Bella, in a world of jaded and blackened souls I've been a part of for so long."

She put her forehead on my shoulder and squeezed my arm as she struggled not to cry.

"What just happened?" I asked, pulling her face up to see her eyes blur with tears.

"You and your damn eloquence is what happened," she replied with a soft laugh. "Oh, God, I need another vacation."

_You need another form of birth control_, I thought wryly.

"That was meant to put a smile on your face, not make you cry."

"I know. That's what sucks so bad."

I wanted to laugh, but my anxiousness over the situation wouldn't allow it. "You don't feel forced, do you?" God only knew how much I didn't want to force Bella into something this weighty. "I can't help but think that I've somehow forced you into this position."

"You could never force me to do anything I don't want to, Edward. I go where you go—willingly—because I love you."

My relief was palpable, swimming in the air around us. I ducked down and brushed my lips against hers. "Enough of this heavy conversation. Is Rosalie expecting you at your flat tonight?"

"It was a little deep," she admitted with a sheepish grin before answering my question. "No, I'm married now. I live with you, not her."

I smiled brightly at her. "That is most definitely the best perk about being married I've heard yet."

"Are you serious?"

"Yes," I chuckled. "I didn't need to wait for sex, Isabella. We were already doing enough of that."

She laughed. "I figured it would be the whole baby thing."

"We could have had babies without being married." I considered that statement for a moment. "Then again, we didn't need vows to live together, either. However, I suppose I'm a bit traditional in my old age and like the fact that we're doing things in their 'appropriate' order."

She giggled.

I threw her that winning smile of mine. The one that typically made her putty in my hands. "No pressure, but I'm ready when you are; you simply have to say the word."

She bit her lip and held my eyes as she thought about it. "Realistically, it's smarter for us to wait for a while. Knowing our luck, we'd continue this pattern we've been following, and it would happen right away. I don't want to bring a baby into this world of bullshit we live in."

I sighed but let my fingers skim over her jaw reassuringly. "I hate that your logic is infallible."

"So do I." She shifted and looked at me hopefully. "Maybe after we move?"

I ginned salaciously. "You can be sure I'll be having my wicked way with you on that occasion."

"Yeah?"

"Mmm," I agreed with a nod. "Positions, locations… we'll have an entire house to christen."

I reached over so that I could stroke her through her jeans. She gasped quietly and moved into my hand, her eyes flitting around the cabin excitedly.

"Fuck, baby," she said breathlessly.

My brow quirked with her reaction. It seemed Bella might have a bit of a voyeuristic streak. This was something I most certainly would have to explore at a later date since the plane was already being secured to the jetway.

We exited the plane and made our way through the terminal. The crowd slowly grew as we were noticed; some of the spectators pointed and murmured to each other, and some of them "discreetly" snapped pictures of Bella and me while we stood in line at customs, talking into our mobiles and letting our family know that we'd arrived back home safely. In all honesty, this wasn't bothersome at all. It was easy for us to ignore the smattering of people who thought that we were interesting enough to watch, but the moment we passed the security checkpoint and into public domain, it all changed. We were rushed by cameras and consumed by the mass hysteria I hadn't missed a bit while in France. And while I_ knew_ it was likely to be the case, it still had me fuming.

I couldn't even get off a bloody plane without causing a frenzy.

I pulled at my hair and wrapped a protective arm around Bella as we walked to the baggage carousel. I turned toward the direction to get to the ticketing counters with a wistful glance—dreaming of hopping on another plane and flying to some random destination—and instantly regretted it. The white flashes of the cameras bouncing off the glass of the doors that led outside seemed so much brighter than they truly were, practically blinding me.

"Good Christ," I swore, burying my face in Bella's hair against the offending glare.

"They don't know already, do they?" Bella asked fearfully.

I shook my head tersely against hers. "No. If they did, I'd have more voicemails than my inbox could handle from every person I've ever met in my life."

"Oh, thank God." Bella exhaled sharply with determination. "Might as well make the best of it."

I stared down at her curiously, wondering what she had in mind.

"Hey, stalkers," she said pleasantly in greeting, as she waved in the direction of the horde of paparazzi.

I laughed.

She shrugged. "Well, what else would you call them? They get paid to stalk us. It's kind of disturbing."

I acknowledged the truth of this with a nod. I wasn't going to utter the words aloud. No doubt if I did, there'd be some Edward-Masen-bashing story flying off the shelves.

My ears rang with their rapid fire of questions while we waited for our luggage to appear. At first, I wanted nothing more than to ignore them all but after thinking it over, I knew how suspicious that would make me look. I finally picked one of the photographers and dutifully answered his endless inquiring with Bella standing silent by my side.

My story was that I decided on a whim—whim being the operative word; I winked at Bella when I said it—that I wanted to show Bella Paris since she'd never been, and after a few days in the city, we decided to take a holiday in the Mediterranean so that I could spend as much time with Bella as possible before I started traveling for _Rogue_. It seemed to have the desired effect. It mollified their curiosity and seemed genuine enough that they didn't pry any further, and it wasn't like I was being completely untruthful. I gave them all of the details of our trip without telling them the actual reason for our visit to Paris or that our holiday wasn't just any holiday; it was our honeymoon.

I loaded our bags onto a cart and started toward the door when a security guard came over and offered his assistance. I'm famous—not helpless—so I politely declined his offer, signed a few things for his wife and daughter so I didn't feel like an arse, and then proceeded to lead us out to where my Aston Martin was parked.

Bella and I worked to get every suitcase into the trunk and backseat, both of us laughing hysterically at the absurdity of something so boring being caught on film and finally managed to shove the last suitcase into the car and shut the door.

"I should've driven the Range Rover instead," I said through my lingering chuckles. Although, when we'd left for Vancouver, I hadn't known I'd be clearing my schedule and marrying Bella.

Bella snickered. "I thought you'd have this all thought out."

I shook my head and grinned at one of the photographers. "She's a shopaholic, this one. She'll have me in the poor house before I can blink."

Bella slapped my arm playfully. "You forget to mention that _you're_ the one who convinced me to buy all this crap."

I waved her off. "Details, details."

I waited until Bella was safely in the car before going around to the driver's side and getting in. I carefully pulled us out of the parking space and away from the crowd, stopping to pay the necessary parking fee, and then sped toward the house.

"Wait, don't go home yet." I couldn't help but grin at Bella's reference to our home. "I need to grab a couple things from the apartment."

I nodded and turned toward her flat. "All right."

The city flew by, mostly because I couldn't wait to get Bella back home and into _our_ bed. I was anxious to tease and taste her; to make her writhe underneath me and feel her tempting flesh brushing against mine for the first time as a married couple in the place we would call home while we were still in LA. I knew it wouldn't be long before we'd start looking into houses in whatever town or city it was that Bella chose to go to graduate school, and I yearned for that next chapter in our life. I couldn't wait to find a house and make it our own without the history of our past, separate lives clinging to the walls or saturating the air, as sappy as that was. I was ready for the tedious tasks of picking out furnishings, paint colors, light fixtures and china patterns with Bella, because it all meant that we were moving forward—together.

I pulled into the closest parking space I could find and rushed to Bella's side so that she could exit the car before the mob claimed us. We bent our heads and huddled together in the center of the photographers, quickly making our way to Bella's flat.

Our feet reached the point that the paparazzi could no longer follow us, and I unwound myself from Bella so that she could move freely and retrieve her keys from her purse. She glanced up at me, and we both burst into laughter again, laughing so hard that we were breathless and holding our stomachs. While it was quite amusing that our mere return to LA caused so much insanity, it was even more incredible to see Bella having the same reactions as I was; to see her laugh about the situation and make jokes about the people she'd despised for so long made me so happy, laughing along with her was all I could do.

Bella finally fished her keys out of her bag and looked toward her door, stopping dead in her tracks and cursing under her breath, jerking her hand unconsciously to feel her bracelet under her jacket. I followed her gaze and nearly groaned at the sight of Renée standing outside the door with her hands clasped primly under the bump of her stomach. She'd changed since Christmas. Obviously, her pregnancy was more noticeable now, but her hair was cut shorter, waving around her face in light brown wisps. She looked… I wasn't sure how to describe it. More at peace, yet troubled at the same time. Contradictory.

"Not today. Not now," Bella whimpered.

"It's all right," I said reassuringly. "You don't have to talk to her."

Bella growled under her breath. "Yes, I do."

"Rosalie said you'd be by soon, but she wouldn't let me wait inside," Renée said, pushing off the wall and taking a step toward us. Her long, brown skirt billowed out behind her with the breeze and her bracelets clinked together noisily.

She hadn't changed_ that_ much.

"Because she's loyal to me, not you," Bella replied harshly.

I brought Bella to my side, shielding her with my body. Bella trembled next to me, on the verge of angry tears, and her nails dug into my waist as she struggled to maintain control. It had me itching to defend her, to interfere with the impending disaster that was staring back at me, but after seeing Bella's reaction to having money—actually holding a piece of paper that made her rich beyond her own comprehension—I couldn't. All these irrational tears and the emotion she'd displayed lately were products of Bella's life changing so drastically. She was used to struggling and working so bloody hard for everything. Having someone able to support her, emotionally and financially, and make her life generally easier, was unimaginably foreign to her.

I bent down and kissed her hair, hoping like hell that by doing so, it would help her adjust to the sharp turn her life took when she met me.

"Your father called," Renée said hesitantly, ignoring Bella's previous statement.

Bella blinked rapidly. "_Why_? He's not called you in three years!"

"To tell me that I missed your wedding."

I sucked in a breath. Renée's knowledge of our marriage could be a very large problem. I didn't think she'd deliberately spread the news, but I couldn't be sure that she wouldn't blurt it out in mid-conversation somewhere. One slip like that could ruin what Bella and I were working so hard to accomplish.

"Fuck," I muttered to myself. I needed to do some quick thinking in order to keep everything quiet. Calling Charlie and yelling at him didn't sound like such a bad idea, either.

"What?" Bella shouted. "Why would he do that? Now you can go and blab it to the press if you want."

"I would never do that," Renée insisted.

Bella scoffed.

"He wanted to make sure he knew how shitty of a mother I was to have not even gotten an invitation."

"It's not like you could go, anyway," Bella mumbled sarcastically, looking down at the ground.

"I could. I'm allowed to travel for another few weeks."

"Oh."

"Would you have invited me?"

Bella's head snapped up defiantly. "Why _would_ I invite you? So you could scream at me and tell me what a horrible mistake I was making?"

Renée heaved a sigh. "I said I was sorry, Bella. I didn't mean to react like that. I was worried about you. About rushing into something so big. About Edward taking advantage of your inexperience with relationships. Charlie may not have taken advantage of my youth, but I was naïve to think I'd like being married. That it would work for us. I didn't want that for you. Unfortunately, all I did was alienate you because of my stupid hormones."

"Bullshit. You married Dad because you got pregnant."

Renée scrubbed her face with her hands. "Look, I can't take back everything I've done to you, but I can apologize again. You don't have to accept it, just know that I'm sincere when I tell you I'm so sorry for not leaving you with Charlie. I wasn't fit to be a parent, but I loved you so damn much, I couldn't leave you behind. I know that now."

"I can't deal with your guilt right now, Renée," Bella said in exasperation. "I'm happy. Just let me be happy." Her fists clenched against my waist, and that signaled the end of the conversation for me.

"Go inside," I murmured. "I'll be right there."

"What are you doing?"

"Just go," I said with a soft smile. "I want to talk to your mother for a moment."

She stared up at me skeptically but with a quick mouthing of "trust me", she finally nodded and slipped out from under my arm.

As soon as she was inside, I unleashed my fury.

"What is wrong with you?" My voice was eerily calm. "Can't you see that every time you come near her you do more harm than good?"

"She wouldn't return my calls. I didn't know how else to talk to her."

I dragged my hands through my hair. "You don't get it, do you? She just told you. She's happy with me—with her life. She wasn't happy with you. Not once. Do you know how hard it is for me to pry a good memory from her? Everything she has revolves around taking care of you and struggling. Of being lonely and emotionally detached from everyone."

"I don't want to lose my daughter, Edward," she argued. "I know how horrible I was to her. I want to try to make up for that."

I laughed dryly and ignored her, because I honestly didn't believe it. "I hope you plan to take some parenting classes for that one," I replied, pointing to her stomach. "You certainly need it."

She looked offended, but I didn't care. "Phil and I are enrolled in a couple, yes."

"Good."

"Will she be okay?" she asked, a line of worry appearing between her brows. "It wasn't my intention to make her angry or upset. I… I missed her."

"She'll be fine. She always is," I answered tightly. "I'll make sure of it."

She started to walk away, but I lightly grabbed her arm to stop her. "Do you need money?"

She looked astonished. Hell, I was a bit shocked myself, but she_ was_ my mother-in-law. I knew that even though Bella was angry, she'd still be concerned about her.

"I'm doing okay. Phil's helping me out."

I hastily grabbed a piece of paper from my pocket and scribbled down the number to my mobile. "Call me if you want to check up on her. Don't just show up and piss her off like this." I shook my head, unable to believe how nice I was being to this woman. "I'm not forcing her into anything; you don't deserve it. But Bella should have a family, in whatever form that may be."

She took the number from my hands. "Thank you," she said emphatically.

I nodded and turned to go back inside.

Bella was sitting on the couch with Rosalie, twisting her fingers with Rosalie's anxiously while she waited for me to come back to her. As soon as the door clicked closed behind me, she wrenched out of Rosalie's grasp and closed the distance between us.

"What did you say?" she asked, throwing her arms around me and burying her face into my chest.

"I told her not to come back and repeated what you told her; that you're happy with me. And I might have offered to give her money if she needed it," I admitted, leaving out the part about giving her my number. I wasn't sure how Bella would react if she knew I was meddling.

She pulled away and gaped at me. "You didn't."

"I did. Don't ask me why, though. I really couldn't tell you."

She laughed. "Jesus, you're something else."

I shrugged. "I know you. You'll worry about her no matter how angry you are. I simply wanted to make sure she was doing all right."

"Yeah, I'm so fucking stupid for letting her get to me like she does," she said, looking away.

I cupped her chin and brought her face to mine. "It doesn't make you stupid. It only proves how _good _you really are, baby."

She stood up on her toes and kissed me. "Can we go home now?"

I smiled against her lips. "You have what you need?"

"Yeah."

"Then I don't see why not," I chuckled.

"Thank God," Rosalie interrupted. "Because you both smell like a giant airport." She sniffed the air. "It reminds me of Emmett's feet."

Bella laughed. "Fuck you."

"No, thank you. Now, get out of my house," Rosalie replied, urging us forward.

Bella rolled her eyes. "We're going."

I opened the door and yanked Bella outside. "We'll see you tomorrow, Rosalie," I said, smiling.

She waved with her fingers. "See ya."

* * *

**Bella**

I stood in one of the upstairs bedrooms—the one that Edward had emptied with the idea that it would become my own personal space in the house—and stared down at the deposit receipt that I'd received earlier. A shot of adrenaline rushed through me as I read the balance amount again. Having this kind of money was exhilarating and relieving all at once. Now that I'd gotten used to the idea of it, I wanted to do something for Edward. I wanted to show him how much I appreciated his generosity. More specifically, how much I appreciated his faith in me. If it hadn't been for him, and his belief that I could renegotiate his contract without any problems, I was pretty damn sure I wouldn't be standing here, married and moving into my husband's fabulous house. The little epiphany I'd had that day finally allowed me to shove my fears aside and enjoy being with him. And, of course, my bank balance would have only had its normal few hundred dollars in it.

Which led me to another line of thought.

My mother.

Other than the anger I felt about her showing up at my apartment and ruining my first night back home as Edward's wife, I was feeling more or less apathetic about the situation. Resigned. She was who she was and no matter how much I wished for something different—something more—it did nothing to hinder the love I had for her. I stupidly missed Renée's impulsiveness and the hilarity of some of her more idiotic phases, but I realized the honesty in my statement of being happy last night. I _was_ happy on my own; happy in the life I was making with Edward. I was going to take all those bad memories of hardship I had as a child and work to make good memories out of them with Edward. Since I was doing so much to force those bad memories into a box labeled "rainbows and sunshine", I wanted to make sure my brother had something decent in his life, too.

So tonight, when every article of clothing and every piece of furniture was in its appropriate place, I was going to talk to Edward about setting up some sort of trust fund for him. I couldn't guarantee that Renée's newfound parenting skills would last and didn't want him to struggle financially the way I had for the last three years. I wanted to make sure he could focus on school or whatever it was that he decided to do with his life and didn't have to take out loan after loan and work odd jobs just to make ends meet and still feel as if he was scraping the bottom of the barrel.

He deserved better than that, better than what I had. If Renée couldn't give it to him, I at least could.

"Where do you want this, BDB?" Emmett grunted, awkwardly carrying my bulky desk into the room by himself.

"Jesus, Em, why didn't you have Edward help you?" I slipped the deposit receipt into my favorite book and put in on the shelf. The action was typically a little overly-sentimental for me but today, I didn't give it a second thought. I could afford to be foolish given everything that had happened in the last week.

"I got this, Bella." He grinned and rested the desk on his knee. "Now, where do you want it?"

"Um, over there's fine, I guess," I replied, pointing to the wall opposite me.

"Done."

Emmett somehow hitched the wooden desk back up and walked it to the other side of the room, carefully scooting it into place.

"Edward's carrying your bed frame into the basement and putting it in the storage room down there. I take it that's okay?" he asked as he pulled my laptop out of the box and sat it on the desk.

"Where else is it going to go? He's got all the spare rooms set up as guest bedrooms, and my rickety old bed would just look out of place in this house, anyway," I laughed.

"Nah. It adds character."

I rolled my eyes. "Whatever."

Emmett hummed something that sounded like this horribly mangled, off-key version of _Suwannee River_ that had me seriously questioning his sanity while he unpacked my printer and started shoving things into random drawers in the desk. I tried to ignore the squawks he considered notes and focused on putting away my ridiculously enormous book collection. It seemed like I was running out of room on the shelves before I knew it and was considering weeding out some of the books I didn't read often anymore when Edward's arms wrapped around my waist and thankfully, distracted me. I was attached to far too many of these books for what was considered healthy.

He spun me around and kissed just under my ear, nearly clinging to me. He was sweaty and gorgeous and smelled like heaven. His cologne hung heavy in the air around me and had my knees almost buckling. The knowledge that I lived here with him now somehow made it even more intoxicating. I got to wake up to this every day. His smooth voice would be the first I'd hear every morning, and his warmth would be the first thing I felt. I'd get to share my day with him over dinner and bitch about whatever it was that pissed me off. He would always be here for me, something that was still so unfamiliar to me, regardless of how true it felt.

He pulled back and gave me a breathtaking smile, finally causing my already wobbling balance to give out. He caught me against him and laughed. "What was that?"

"No idea. I think I'm going into shock."

"Shock?"

I nodded and glanced around the pale gray room that was suddenly full of my belongings, feeling as if I was living in some fantasy world—blissfully trapped in a dream. It was simply just too good to be true, all of it. Edward, especially. Nothing in my life had ever been this easy or brought me so much joy so of course, my stubborn brain wanted to reject it and deny the possibility that I actually might deserve it.

And I guess that was what it all came down to. I didn't necessarily believe that I was undeserving of everything Edward had given me; it just felt like maybe the other shoe would drop at any given second. It was only a matter of time. It always was. Just like I knew that we couldn't keep the fact that we were married a secret for long. Sooner or later, some journalist would figure it out and run a little exposé full of wild accusations that I'd never be able to think of myself and make it into some huge scandal. Maybe call me the gold-digger I knew they all thought of me as.

"You know, you're awfully smart hiding up here away from all the manual labor," he said with a quick, crooked grin.

"Hide with me?"

"I'd rather have you moved in. If I help, it's that much quicker, love."

I frowned.

"Are you all right? You seem a bit… I don't know. Sad, all of the sudden."

"I was just thinking, I guess."

"Not about your mother, I hope. She seemed sincere, but it's your decision whether or not you want to go there again. I'll support you in whatever you do."

"No, not about Renée. It's more like I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop."

He pulled away from me and looked horrified. "Is that what's wrong with you? You're waiting for us to _fail_?"

Emmett whistled lowly from the corner.

I took his face in my hands and kissed him hard. "No, I don't think we'll fail. I just… everything in my life has been hard except you. It was so easy to fall in love with you. I keep thinking I'll wake up, and it will have all been a dream. Even with the paparazzi being a pain in my ass."

Edward reached down and pinched my ass roughly, causing me to yelp.

"There, not a dream. Stop being so bloody ridiculous," he snapped.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

He sighed heavily, bringing his hands to my shoulders and massaging lightly. "I had to fall in love with the most difficult woman on the planet. If you're not freaking over one thing, it's only because you've moved on to something else."

A giggle escaped my throat. He was unfortunately right. "I'm sorry. Really, I am. I'll finish unpacking my books now."

Edward threw the rest of the books haphazardly on the shelves, emptying the box in no time, and grinned. "I'd rather go downstairs and fill the drawer for you knickers. Got any more of those boy shorts left to unpack?" he asked with a glint in his eye.

"I think you're in luck." I paused deviously. "But I'm finishing this first."

"What's to finish?" he pouted. "I've clearly taken care of it all for you." He elegantly motioned to the disorderly bookshelf.

"I'd like it to be organized. Surely, you and your OCD feel the same way."

He chuckled. "I could handle it for a while. Then, I'd be up here to rearrange my mess."

"Thought so," I said smugly. "And I still have that box over there full."

"Well, shit."

I laughed.

Edward and I went to work unloading the books onto the shelves, both of us cringing when Emmett started to sing again. We were almost finished unpacking the final box of books when I heard Angela call my name from the hall.

"In here!" I shouted back.

"I hope you don't mind that Rosalie let me in," she said as she stepped in the room with two boxes of pizza in one hand and a six pack in the other. "I came to see if I could help any, but it looks like I missed all the action."

"Yeah, we're almost finished."

She examined the room with a growing smile and finally looked back over at me. "This is so roomy."

Emmett's head popped up from behind the computer desk, electrical cords in hand. "I had a girlfriend like that once."

Edward and I both chuckled at the blush that crept up Angela's cheeks.

"Needless to say," he continued, "she didn't last long."

"Come up with something better, you git," Edward retorted as he took the pizza from Angela. "I think a break is in order.

"Hello, you look rather lovely this afternoon," he said with a wide smile to Angela, making a big show of grabbing her hand and spinning her in a circle.

She beamed right back at him. "Hi, I take it you're in a good mood?"

"Extremely," he said with exaggeration. "I got married while I was in Paris."

_Well, fuck me._

Angela's jaw dropped, and then she jumped up and down excitedly, squealing like an idiot.

"Bella Swan, why didn't you say something?"

"I didn't want to tell you over the phone?" I shot Edward a look that only caused him to laugh.

She pursed her lips and nodded. "Good enough. Come here!"

I walked over to her and let her hug me, grunting when the beer hit me on the back.

"Congratulations, sweetie. I'm so happy for you," she said softly, still managing to not to sound any less enthusiastic.

"Thanks."

We all followed Edward downstairs to the kitchen. He opened the pizza boxes on the bar and got out plates and napkins for everyone. I took a bite as soon as I sat down and glanced around the table, taking note at how common of a scene this was. Here was Edward… this superstar… wiping sauce off his face and asking Angela about her relationship with Ben in between laughs from Emmett's dumb ass trying to make a teepee out of his pizza slices. Times like these—the examples of why I felt like that pedestal Edward had been put on was so wrong—made me love him even more. He wasn't unattainable or self-centered. He was just Edward.

Edward and I quickly cleaned up the kitchen before we got to work unpacking my clothes. I followed his instructions to the letter, smiling to myself at how extremely organized everything had to be. Socks went in one specific drawer and were folded just so. The underwear I usually just shoved into the drawer was folded as neatly as possible and actually stacked. The clothes that were hung in the closet were color-coded and also systematically arranged by season.

When he got to my shoes, I couldn't stand it anymore.

"Throw them on the shelves and call it a night, Edward," I snickered.

He looked at me blankly. "What?"

"Look. Let's have some disorder among the orderly, okay? Call it a team effort. You methodically put away all of my clothes, so now I'm going to just toss my shoes in here since that's how they'll end up after a few weeks, anyway."

He looked between the black stilettos in his hands, me, and the shelf longingly. "Have it your way."

"And no coming behind me and redoing it all," I warned him with a grin.

His eyes narrowed. "All right."

I tossed the shoes onto the closet shelves, letting them fall where they may, and then wrapped my arms around Edward's neck.

"See, that wasn't so bad, was it?" I asked, batting my eyelashes at him.

"You're entering dangerous territory, Swan. I'm a man unhinged," he said darkly with a smirk.

I waggled my finger at him. "It's Masen," I corrected, pulling him down to me.

Our lips collided, and he slammed me into the shelving unit with a growl, causing shoes to topple down around us. "You know," he mumbled against my lips. "This concludes the actual process of moving you in. You live here now."

I let out a throaty moan. "Why is that so fucking hot?"

"I've no idea. But it is," he said as he dragged his mouth along my jaw and grabbed my ass, bringing my hips closer to his. His stubble scraped at my skin, and I thought I might lose my mind.

A very distinct throat cleared beside us.

"Damn it, Rosalie," I cursed, pulling away from Edward.

"I hate to interrupt," she started sweetly.

"No, you don't," I scoffed.

"No, you're right. I don't." She crossed her arms over her chest, looking so damn pleased with herself. "But there's someone at the gate who says she's your publicist. Do I let her up?"

"Name?" Edward asked, clutching me against him.

"Zafrina. Long black hair? Drives a white Mercedes?"

He nodded. "Let her up. I'll meet her at the door."

Rosalie nodded and disappeared, so I went to follow her, only to find that Edward wouldn't let me go.

"Don't move." He pressed himself into me to elaborate.

"Oh."

He smiled widely. "I need a moment."

"I can feel that."

His smile brightened, crinkling the skin around his eyes.

"What do you think she wants?" I asked curiously.

"Does it matter? We'd planned to call her this evening to talk to her, anyhow."

"True."

When Edward was finally sure he could walk around without pitching a tent, he released me enough so that we could find Zafrina. We rounded the corner, and Edward bent down to kiss my temple.

"We'll finish that later," he murmured at my ear.

"God, I fucking hope so," I breathed back.

He chuckled and held me tighter against him.

"Did I miss something?" Zafrina asked, stepping over the folded boxes at the door and looking around the disarrayed foyer in confusion. She looked perfect, as usual, with her hair cascading over her shoulders and her black pinstripe suit, but I didn't feel threatened like I did before. She seemed powerless to me now.

Emmett was breaking down the rest of the boxes that he'd brought downstairs and jerked his head in Zafrina's direction. I nodded at his silent question, and his brows shot up along with the corners of his lips.

"Nice," he said with a bob of his head.

"Not helpful, Emmett. At all," I snarled.

"Bella moved in," Edward said to Zafrina pleasantly.

She blinked. A few times, if I was being honest, and got this glazed look in her eyes. "Oh. I see."

"Listen, Z, I'm glad you stopped by. Bella and I had planned to call you tonight."

"To tell me you were moving in together?"

"Among other things."

"Like what?"

Edward shifted uncomfortably and ran his free hand through his hair.

"I know that look, Edward."

He sighed. "Let's go to the study first, shall we?"

Zafrina followed us into the study warily and looked even more terrified when Edward shut the door behind us.

"What the hell is going on?" she demanded. "Did you get her pregnant or something?"

"What?" I barked out in shock.

"Shit, he did. God, that's notgoing to go over well, especially now, given the circumstances." She started pacing with irritation.

Edward looked flabbergasted at her assumption. "Zafrina, relax. She's not pregnant." His brows knit. "Are you, love?"

I giggled, unable to help myself with how strange this whole thing was. "No."

"There, you see?" Edward asked with a smile. "Though, I'm not entirely sure why that would be a problem."

"It just… it wouldn't look as good for us to announce something like that right now," she replied with a shake of her head. "So what do you need to talk to me about that requires a private setting?"

"Sit down first," Edward instructed.

"No, I'm fine, thanks," she shot back, pushing her hair away from her face with a jerky movement.

"Zafrina, I'm not asking you. Sit down," he commanded.

She huffed, but it sounded like more of a defense mechanism than actual annoyance, and sat down on the arm of the couch, looking as if she was about to bolt at any given second.

And I couldn't blame her at all. If it were me, and I'd been surprised with the fact that my unrequited love's fiancée had just moved in with him, I'd want to run as far away as I could, too.

Edward sat in the chair across from her and glanced over at me. I smiled a little and he took a deep breath, gearing up to tell her what he knew would no doubt break her heart.

"Our trip to Paris was not just for a simple holiday," he said slowly, gently. "We eloped."

I watched her closely, with a sting of irrational guilt and pity for her as she tried to blink away the rapidly collecting tears. I felt awful. Worse than I'd ever imagined I would. It was like I was taking this woman's happiness away from her, which was totally stupid, but I couldn't seem to stop wishing I could do something to make her feel better.

Again, something that was totally stupid. It wasn't my fault she allowed herself to hope for Edward all this time.

"Shit," I whispered to myself as her chin trembled. Edward reached out to comfort her but thought better of it and snatched his hand back.

"I'm sorry," he said awkwardly.

She shook her head and took a deep breath. "It's not your fault."

A few more minutes went by before she was finally composed enough to speak again.

"Congratulations." She tried to smile, but it wasn't a pretty sight.

"Thanks," we muttered in unison.

"You need me to write up a quick announcement?" she asked, dabbing at her eyes a little.

"No, we'd actually like to keep it a secret," Edward responded. "That's where you come in."

She nodded. "Got it. Evade and deflect."

"Thank you."

She shrugged. "It's my job."

Edward's eyes darted over to me to make sure I was all right and then focused his attention on Zafrina again. "So what did you come by to talk about?"

"Oh, right." She laughed a little. "You'll love this."

Edward sat up stiffly like he'd already heard what it was and didn't like it. "No, I don't think I will."

She laughed again. "No, probably not. I got wind of an announcement Tanya's publicist is working up along with fishing for an exclusive interview with her to all come out sometime in the next month."

I sat down next to Edward, forgetting the guilt that I'd felt earlier and completely engrossed in the subject at hand. "Okay?"

"It turns out Tanya's pregnant and has known about it since Christmas."

I cackled, startling Edward and myself.

"Bella, baby? What is so bloody funny?" he asked in confusion.

"Don't you get it?" I asked between my horrific-sounding laughs.

"No."

"Edward, you were being used," Zafrina said patting his knee patronizingly. "Tanya had planned to pull you into her baby drama by claiming you were the father."

"Excuse me?" Edward asked incredulously. "No, not even Tanya would stoop that low."

"Don't be so sure, baby. After all, you two looked like a couple. It would be everyone's assumption that the baby was yours unless she openly admitted to either your relationship being a scam or cheating on you. Both made her look bad," I pointed out. "And she knows you. You two may not like each other personally, but she knows enough about you to know how extremely kind and generous you are. Would you honestly have said no?"

"Without you in the picture?"

I nodded.

"Probably not. It would have been something I'd have looked forward to, being a father. Even if it was all just to save face."

"Exactly," Zafrina interjected with more animation than I'd expected right now. The woman must really love her job. "But you started dating Bella. And while you two kept it quiet, Tanya had her suspicions for a while, am I correct?"

"Yes."

"So someone shows her these pictures on New Year's and her plans are destroyed. What else would a desperate, hormonal woman do but try to bury you and Bella? Make you look just as bad as she would? It was also very smart of her to try to use your supposed affair to bring all the attention on you so that she can buy herself some time and figure out what to do next. Problem is, she overestimated your kindness and thought you'd just take it without another word. She didn't anticipate us fighting back."

Edward tugged at his hair. "Fuck. Well, I'm open to suggestions. What do you think I should do?"

"Talk to her," I replied, earning strange looks from both of them. "Listen, you have to deal with her for the next few months for _Rogue_. You need to make sure you can be as civil with one another as possible while doing press together. And I really don't like the woman, but think of how she feels right now, Edward. There's no telling what her personal life is really like. I-"

Edward grabbed me and kissed me, laughing as he pulled back. "You still surprise me, Isabella. All the time."

I bit my lip uncertainly. I couldn't tell if his laugh was a good or bad thing. "Oh."

He turned back to Zafrina. "So it looks like I'll be paying Tanya a visit."

Zafrina smiled at me ruefully. "It's a good idea. It makes my job easier."

"Thanks," I said, feeling a rush of pleasure for actually coming up with something they both liked.

"Okay, Edward here's what you do-"

"You buy the woman flowers and make peace," I interrupted.

Again with the strange looks.

"And what kind of flowers am I buying?" Edward asked with an arched brow.

I said the first thing that came to mind. The flowers that would make me smile no matter how depressed I was.

"Lilies."


	31. Chapter 31

**As always, thanks for the reviews, adds, and any recs you guys do for this little project of mine.**

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**This chapter is a little different and shorter than a lot of the previous chapters have been. Originally, it was nearly 11k words long, but after asking Super Beta his opinion, he was of the same mind as me and decided it should be split into two sections. Good parts: this chapter is strictly EPOV and chapter 32 is already written, beta'd, and waiting for publishing. Bad parts: Chapter 32 is strictly BPOV and made this chapter a little like filler, which I hate to do.**

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* * *

Chapter 31

**Edward**

I drove to Tanya's house in the Hollywood Hills, in complete disbelief about what I was doing. Bella, as always, had surprised me with her suggestion to make peace with Tanya. It hadn't surprised me because Bella was incapable of devising some sort of genius plan to help make our lives simpler, better; the woman had more wits about her than I could ever dream of having. It was surprising because neither Zafrina nor I had ever considered it an option. It had been assumed that we'd continue retaliating as we always did. This—if it worked—would hopefully end this madness. It might pacify Tanya enough so that I could start to focus on more important things, rather than having to constantly provide quotes and see myself on the cover of the tabloids in response to another insult or insinuation about me. Retribution was, in its own way, enjoyable, but it was tedious and time consuming, and if not properly executed, could make me seem even more spiteful and vindictive than Tanya did at the moment. Which was unacceptable.

I parked just opposite Tanya's front door and stared up at the house. It was nice; ivory colored with celery green trim and garage doors on the first floor with the living quarters above, reminding me of a boxier, more contemporary version of my house in Villefranche, but it wasn't something that I would have chosen for myself. I liked the flow of my house, the expansive garden in the back, and the fact that it wasn't always necessary to climb a flight of stairs to go from one room to the next.

I reached over and grabbed the bouquet of lilies that Bella had suggested I bring out of the passenger's set, holding them up to examine them. They were massive, pink-tipped with brown spots all over them. Stargazers, if I recalled correctly. They were admittedly beautiful, but I'd rather have had the satisfaction of throwing them into the disposal and watch as they were shredded into a million little pieces than to place them in Tanya's hands. However, simply put, I wanted to get away from it all. I no longer wanted the unnecessary dramatics that were involved with acting. I never wanted to see Bella scandalized or witness that clawing panic rise in her eyes. I wanted to give Bella everything she could ever hope for, including peace and solitude and family. I was so bloody close; I'd given her myself and brought her what she deemed to be an idyllic family. Interest in Tanya and me was slowly dying down, and even though Bella and I were still hounded incessantly because of our own relationship, it was one less thing we needed to deal with. I'd do anything—crawl on my knees and wave a white flag at Tanya if needed—to erase it entirely.

It was sad really, but I was quickly realizing that I had no choice in the matter. I could rebel all I wanted, but it did nothing to change the fact that my life was still scrutinized, my professional relationships gossiped over. My life was the job, and liberation—the day I could finally do as I pleased without a second thought—was still so far away. I'd had the occasional feelings of imprisonment since I'd met Bella, but it had never been so consuming and as powerful as it was today. Each movie I made just tightened the manacles, added to my chains. Until I stopped acting entirely, I'd never break free.

I climbed the steps and stood on the stoop for a moment, adjusting the collar of my shirt and making sure my jeans hung over my shoes properly before trying to tame my wild hair. I knew I was simply putting off the inevitable; it wasn't like I really cared about what I looked like to Tanya, so I finally stopped being so absurd and rang the bell.

I could hear it chiming loudly inside the house through the swirling glass door. I peeked inside, nervously wondering how long it would take for any of the paparazzi to realize my location, and exhaled in relief as I saw Tanya shuffle toward me. She opened the door with red, puffy eyes and a tissue to her nose. The idea of Bella like this—distraught over seemingly nothing, angry over everything because she was working to bring our baby into the world—had my lips twitching with amusement, but the thought of Tanya was a completely different matter. Normally, the woman was frightening. Like this, she was bound to be demonic.

Medusa came to mind. I simply had to make sure I didn't make eye contact if I wanted to stay alive and not become some stone bird perch by the pool.

"Here," I said tersely, shoving the flowers at her.

"What are these for?"

"They're from Bella. If I had my way, I'd have brought you a broom to go with your hat. Or perhaps a straightjacket would be better suited."

She stiffened. "I guess I deserve that."

I simply stared at her, unwilling to comment on that. No good would come of it if I did so.

She carefully brushed her finger over the lilies, and a tear fell down her cheek. "Tell Bella I said thank you."

Well, now I felt like an arse. "I will. Just so you know, I didn't object to bringing you flowers. But I didn't come up with the idea."

"Thank you," she said reluctantly. "I take it you know?"

I nodded, shifting my weight on my feet and keeping the desire to turn around and scan the grounds for photographers in check. "You had options; you didn't have to try to use me, Tanya." While I could never picture something like that for myself, I was open-minded enough to know that not everything I wanted was right for someone else.

She shook her head violently. "I tried, Edward, I did. I made the appointment, drove to the clinic. But I couldn't do it."

I softened a bit more. "I suppose that speaks for your character some."

She swiped at her eyes with the tissue. "Come in. Sit down. God knows I don't want some stupid photographer taking pictures of me looking like this." She glanced behind me and smoothed her hair with her available fingers.

I suppressed the need to groan and roll my eyes. So much for thinking she was changing into someone somewhat decent. Here I was, worried about the paparazzi making something out of nothing and causing Bella to cry, and she was worried about her appearance. But this, at least, was familiar. It made me more at ease with the situation because I'd dealt with Tanya's vanity for the six weeks we filmed. I knew this. I'd lived it. I could handle it.

She led me up the stairs and into the stark white living room, complete with vaulted ceilings and a huge Art Deco portrait of herself, and sat down on the plush, light gray couch, drawing her feet up under her and setting the flowers in her lap. I sat in the chair opposite her and braced my elbows on my knees, staring at her seriously.

"I need to know what you were thinking."

She huffed and fidgeted with the sleeve of her light pink shirt. "I was thinking everyone thought we were together, and here I was knocked up. You'd have to pretend the baby was yours. Otherwise, our cover would have been blown. I knew how much you wanted a family, and it seemed like a win-win situation to me. No one would think I screwed around behind your back, and you'd get your baby."

"I see. What made you think that would honestly work?" I asked stoically.

"You'd have said no?"

I raked my hands through my hair and shook my head. "I'd have said yes, had Bella not been involved. And it would have been a bloody disaster."

"Why?" she asked, furrowing her brows.

"I can't stand you. I couldn't parent with you."

"I wasn't planning to stay involved," she muttered.

This explained so much more of her actions than anything else and gave me further insight into her irrational hatred toward Bella. Because of Bella's involvement with me, she was in essence keeping Tanya from getting that "out" she so desperately wanted.

"You'd have just given the baby to me?" I asked in shock.

She nodded.

"So you wanted me to be the actual, adoptive parent?" I asked, still in denial.

"That was the plan."

"Huh."

She cracked a smile at my bewilderment. I didn't think it was all that amusing myself. Just thinking of how complicated the entire scheme was gave me a headache. And if I'd met Bella after the fact… who's to say she would have wanted anything to do with a single father? Or that I wouldn't have regretted it if she had still wanted to be with me? Going about the process of having a baby—natural or adoptive—would be so much sweeter with Bella than by any other means.

I suddenly felt like I'd dodged a bullet.

I cleared my throat. "You didn't anticipate Bella, I take it."

"No. I had my suspicions and thought maybe if I made things hard for Bella, she'd walk away and I'd still have you to take the baby for me. It never even occurred to me that you honestly loved her already. So all I did was manage to make myself look crazy," she sobbed.

I probably should have found this pitiful since she was obviously so upset about it, but really, I just found it annoying and pathetic. Not to mention suspicious. Tanya was, if nothing else, an excellent actress.

"People do irrational things when faced with desperate circumstances," I conceded. "And I understand your fear for your reputation and how it would look since everyone assumed we were together, but I don't understand why you didn't just plan to go to the father, talk to me, and break our agreement without causing such a scene. People drift apart every day, Tanya. No one would have ever been the wiser."

"I couldn't."

"Why?" I countered. I wasn't letting her get away without giving me a detailed explanation.

"Because I don't know who the father is," she bit back, flushing a little from her embarrassment.

I exhaled sharply. "I suppose that does pose a bit of a dilemma."

"You think?" she snarked.

"Tanya," I warned with a glare.

"Sorry," she mumbled. "I get pissed off at the drop of a hat."

"I noticed," I said dryly.

She sighed and looked away.

"So you don't know who the father is," I continued before pausing and chuckling with the ridiculousness of it all. "I'm sorry, but how is that possible?"

"Not all of us are as perfect as you," she spat.

This time, I did groan. "Let's say for argument's sake that I slept around before Bella. Couldn't lock it up and had to shag everything with the desired body parts. I still don't see how it's possible for you not to have any inclination of who the father is at all."

"I'm not a whore," she said defiantly.

"Saying that does nothing to change your… condition."

"You self-righteous-"

I laughed; my reaction cut off anything she was about to say. "Tanya, I wasn't implying you were anything. Simply stating a fact."

She glared at me coldly.

"I was hoping we could try to make some sort of peace about the situation, because in five weeks, you and I will be forced into many awkward, very public situations, and I will be having a hard enough time being away from Bella. I don't need you making it any worse. If that's impossible for you, tell me and I'll leave."

She grumbled a little, looking extremely displeased, so I took that as a concession.

"What are you plans now?"

"Well, we're looking to put out an interview in the next couple of weeks, announcing the baby."

I nodded; I knew all this. "What will be in the article?"

"My publicist is practically _demanding_," she responded, rolling her eyes, "that I say that I prefer to keep the father's identity private, and I'm to mention something that says that anything involving you was my fault. 'My actions were a result of the surge of hormones' or whatever. Oh, and I'm to make sure everyone knows that you are not the father and our relationship was strictly professional, as you graciously proved for me. It seems your publicist got with mine on that one," she said, toying with a lock of hair.

"You don't seem to be taking this seriously," I said tightly.

"What's the big deal? I start gushing about this baby and everyone will forget all about our little… fight."

"Do you really not see the enormity of what you did to me? To Bella?"

She shrugged a shoulder. "You got more press."

"I got more _unwanted_ press."

"How is any press unwanted press?"

"Because unlike you, I'm trying to get out of this business so that I can have an ordinary life with Bella. I've told you this." She would never understand, nor would she try. She'd simply continue to be vapid and self-absorbed, so there was no point explaining it to her again.

"You know what? It doesn't matter. I'm sorry for you. Genuinely sorry that you found yourself in a situation that you didn't want. But you need to learn to deal with the consequences of your actions. You can't go around blaming other people or trying to make them just as miserable as you are. More importantly, you can't manipulate whomever you please and then throw a fit when we don't all bend to you will or bow at your feet."

She was silent. For so long, I nearly got up and left.

"Edward, I'm…" She grimaced. "Sorry."

Oh, how I wanted to rub it in. As it was, I smiled and arched my brow. "Thank you."

"Yeah."

"So if we're good here, I'll just show myself out," I said, standing to leave.

"Back to Bella?" she sneered.

"Did we not just agree to a truce?" I asked in exasperation.

"I still think she's using you."

"And that would make you completely wrong."

She laughed. "Maybe."

"Definitely."

I walked toward the stairs and then stopped, suddenly compelled to turn around and say one last thing. "Tanya, don't use that baby the way you typically use everyone else in your life. I don't know how… contained as the news is at the moment, but don't become a parent just to look good or be trendy. Don't have it and let some nanny raise it for you. Give it to someone who will give it a good home and the life it deserves; to someone who will love it unconditionally when you couldn't. Don't let your selfishness or even your pride get in the way of that."

She looked blown away by my statement, so I left her to mull it over in private. There was no way to know if she'd take my advice to heart or not, but no matter what her decision actually was, at least I could say that I had said something when I was given the opportunity.

* * *

"Are you ready to go?" Bella asked from the back door.

_Not particularly…_

I turned to face her, her beauty causing me to forget my annoyance with the fact that we were getting ready to leave our quiet little world to meet up with Jacob and his new girlfriend at some Indian restaurant he'd sworn was "paparazzi-proof". I'd never had the pleasure of experiencing some place "paparazzi-proof"; they followed me just about anywhere and would wait for hours for me to reappear, so I was a little unconvinced by his claim.

"You look beautiful," I complimented with a smile.

She blushed but rolled her eyes. "It's just jeans and a plain white tank top, Edward."

It was the simplicity of it that made her look so incredible. Her beauty was natural—the very first thing that drew me to her. The femininity of her curves, the pureness of her blush, and the carefree waves of her hair called to me in a way that no other woman had ever done before. I was enraptured by her intellect and taken by her smile.

I walked over to her, still grinning, and kissed her temple, stifling a moan as her divine scent enveloped me. "You look good. You always do. But those jeans have done something to those gorgeous legs of yours. So excuse me if I drool over my wife before we go out."

"They're one of the freebies that I got the other day. Seven's or something. It feels weird wearing them."

"Why's that? You knew that this was part of becoming a 'celebrity'."

"It feels wrong. Like I'm sponging off of you," She admitted quietly.

"You do no such thing. You've never once shirked your responsibilities as my assistant, and you do an amazing job as my agent," I replied firmly.

"I know you say that… but you're a little biased." She grinned up at me and wrapped her arms around my waist. "How can I trust your opinion when it's in your best interest not to piss off your wife? We women can be very sensitive sometimes," she joked.

"Wouldn't want you upset," I murmured with a smile.

"It's good to get upset every now and then," she mumbled into my chest. "Tears, angry or sad, are cleansing."

"You've had far too many 'cleansing' tears in your lifetime for my liking. Unless they're happy tears, I never want to see you cry again," I replied honestly.

"Sweet. But totally unrealistic." She sighed. "What are you doing out here, anyway?"

"Enjoying the evening while Samson runs. It's the first pleasant night we've had in a while. No coats required."

She threw me a teasing smile. "You're hiding."

"I'm doing nothing of the sort," I responded, glancing over to where Samson was sniffing at the ground.

"Oh, really? You may be one of the best actors out there, but you can't fool me."

I shrugged unrepentantly. "Well, maybe I was hiding for a moment."

She laughed. "We should go before we're late."

I shook my head vehemently.

"Edward," she laughed. "Come on. It's just dinner and dancing."

"It's been two months since I last had to talk to Jacob Black outside of work. Forgive me if I'm enjoying the silence."

"He's not_ that_ bad."

"To you, maybe," I argued lightly.

She shoved me toward the door with another laugh. "Let's go."

I grumbled profanities under my breath and motioned for Samson to follow us. I got Samson fresh water and pulled the R8's keys off the hook, still grumbling, because I was not looking forward to an entire night full of Jacob's antagonism. I could have blatantly refused to go. I was very aware of this fact. And I might have if I didn't love the current smile that was on Bella's face—the one that was bright and incredibly happy—so much.

"Husband! Shut the fuck up!" she exclaimed playfully as soon as we reached the car.

"No. Do you have any idea how much agony I'm bound to suffer at Jacob's hands?" I asked as I slid in the driver's seat.

"Aw, I'll make it up to you. Promise." She licked her lips as her eyes darkened. "I'll give you the three 'B's."

My forehead wrinkled with confusion. "The three 'B's?" I asked, starting the engine.

"Blowjob. Bella. Bed."

I groaned and adjusted myself since all the spare blood my body had was now centered in my groin. "Well, there's a thought."

"Does it make it worth your while?"

"Meh."

She slapped my arm. "Hey!"

I chuckled. "It helps considerably, love."

I drove to the shopping complex Bella directed me to, taking note of the eight black vehicles that followed me the entire way. They surrounded me, parking in the empty spaces and leaping out of the doors with their cameras as soon as they shut off the engines.

Of course.

I opened Bella's door for her and let her lead me inside the complex, chatting inanely with the photographers while making sure none of them got too close to Bella. We got inside and walked straight past the gawking shoppers and to a black metal door that was opposite the bathroom.

"Where are we going?" I laughed as soon as we were in the alley.

"Over here, I guess," Bella replied, pointing to another metal door in the opposite building.

We walked through the door, avoiding breathing in the ghastly stench of the bin as we past it, and into a bustling, extremely loud kitchen.

"Shit," she said as we both froze in place.

"Erm…?"

"Bella!" Jacob's voice rang out from behind a gauzy red curtain. "Over here!"

I took Bella's hand and snaked our way past the long line of cooks to the small party room where Jacob and Bree—at least I was assuming the blue-eyed blond next to him was Bree—were waiting. We rounded the corner, and Jacob burst into laughter.

"Sweet baby Jesus on a Ritz Bitz, Swan! What the hell are you wearing?" he snickered.

Bella growled loudly, spun around on her heel, and walked back out into the kitchen.

"Where are you going?" I called after her.

"Bathroom! I'll be right back!"

I pinched the bridge of my nose and huffed. "Honestly, Jacob. Why?"

"What? I told her to dress nice and she showed up looking like Kid Rock's long lost sister," he replied defensively.

I glanced around and noticed that Jacob was dressed in a pair of light gray trousers and a blue pinstriped button up with the collar unbuttoned slightly, and Bree was wearing a sleeveless white cocktail dress.

At least I didn't look _horribly_ out of place in my jeans since my shirt was similar to Jacob's.

"She didn't say."

"Obviously."

I pushed my sleeves up and sat down in the chair opposite Bree. We all sat in awkward silence for a bit before I finally decided to do something about it and break the ice.

"Since Jacob over there has forgotten his manners, I'll introduce myself. Edward Masen," I said, reaching out to shake her hand.

"What? I don't do introductions. Surely you've figured that out by now," Jacob commented.

Bree rolled her eyes and grinned. "Bree Tanner. Jacob's said a lot about you."

I barked out a laugh. "I'm sure he has."

"It wasn't _all _bad, Methuselah."

I rolled my eyes at his terrible joke.

"Sweetie, who's Methuselah?" Bree asked Jacob innocently.

"Oldest man in the Bible," I answered for him. "Jacob thinks he's amusing."

"Oh, come on," he protested. "You sometimes call me a dog."

"Because your tribe thinks they descend from wolves. I'm English, moron. You want to be witty? Call me something like 'Merlin' or 'Arthur'."

He shook his head. "Not as old. And besides, those are medieval heroes; it would give you too much credit. Methuselah's only claim to fame is as the oldest living human in the Old Testament."

"I'm going to go mad before dinner's served," I muttered to myself.

"What's there to complain about?" Jacob asked, sipping his water. "Things seemed to have turned out well for you."

"You're joking, right? How about spending time with you? That's an awfully large stick in my craw."

"The feeling's mutual, buddy."

"Good."

Bree gaped. "Wow. You two are…"

"We know," we said in unison.

Her brows shot up. "Okay…"

Bella hopped through the door, and I exhaled loudly in relief. "Oh, thank God."

And then I blinked. She'd changed. She was adjusting the strap of the black, jeweled stilettos she'd bought and was wearing a teal, loosely-fitting silk top with a bow at the hip; the white tank she'd had on previously was bunched up in her hand along with the ballet flats she'd been wearing. Part of her hair was twisted up, secured by a single black clip. I didn't know whether to kiss her for her ingenuity or scream about her stupidity for walking throughout the shopping center alone.

"Bella," I said tersely.

"Don't. No one noticed me. I raced into one store and came right back out. I, uh, did spend five hundred dollars, though," she said, looking away from me. "And this was the cheaper of the two shirts I liked."

"Bella," I repeated, this time the smile on my face was evident in my voice.

"Right. _Our_ money. Got it." She smiled back at me and then faced Jacob. "Better, asshole?"

"Much. They won't let you in unless you're dressed up. I told you that."

"And I forgot!"

He laughed. "Whatever. Let's eat. I'm starved."

Dinner went by quickly since Bella and Bree were so entertaining. They talked and laughed like they'd already known each other for a while, leaving Jacob and me to ourselves. I loved watching Bella meet someone new; someone she had a lot in common with, who also had found herself thrown into the spotlight when she started dating Jacob. It was a connection I couldn't even begin to fathom, one that would hopefully help ease that stubborn part of her that was still so fearful of the life she had with me now.

When we had all had our fill, we paid and left through the front door, where we proceeded to actually walk to the club down the street.

Without a paparazzo in sight.

"I don't believe it," I muttered as we slid past security and into the dark club. "No paparazzi."

"Told ya," Jacob said smugly.

I shook my head and led Bella to the bar, unwilling to answer him over the thumping music. I ordered Bella the pomegranate martini she wanted and took a sip, scrunching my nose as the sweet, strong liquor hit my tongue.

"You'd better watch those things. They'll come back and bite you in the arse," I shouted at her.

She grinned. "I know. That's what makes them so good!"

I rolled my eyes. "But you're being so much fun. Why spoil it?"

"I'm not that bad!"

I simply grinned back at her.

"Not funny."

"Neither are you when you're pissed. Now, give me that." I took a large gulp and then handed back to her with a shudder. "Let's go dance."

"But what about Jacob and Bree?"

I gave her a look. "I could care less about Jacob and Bree. I want to feel you against me."

Wisely, she threw her drink back and sat the empty glass on the bar. "Let's go."

I knew a crowd had formed around us; I could feel their gazes crawling over my skin, but I refused to look away from Bella. I'd never make it to the dance floor because of the mob that was bound to confront me if I did. I kept my arm around her as we pushed our way through them all and saw flashes of various cameras around me, along with the irritated face Bella made up at me that nearly mirrored my own.

But none of it mattered the second I spun her around and felt her body move with mine. For someone so inherently clumsy, she was an incredible dancer. Her skin was dewy with sweat; her body flushed with exertion. Her hips rolled with an unknowing seduction that had me clinging to her, wanting to strip her down and watch her move her sexy, bared body in front of me. _For_ me.

I threaded my hands through her hair and tipped her head back so that I could taste her alluring mouth. Tinged with alcohol, her lips were sweet and wet, soft and pliant against my own. Her kiss was effortless, but it did nothing to hinder the desire I was racked with as our tongues tangled heedlessly together. Home, alone, I would press on until we were joined together. Here, I had no choice but to stop.

I trailed my mouth over her jaw and nipped at her ear. "We should go home now," I said roughly.

She nodded but before she could answer, she was suddenly yanked back by a giggling Bree.

"I want to dance with Bella," she slurred.

"Oh, my God," Bella said wide eyed, rigidly standing in place while Bree ground her hips… all over her.

Jacob slid up next to me, laughing uncontrollably. "Yeah, she had one too many. I tried to stop her, but she's pretty stubborn."

"I see that."

"I saw you and Bella over here getting a little… friendly." He shook his head and laughed. "How much fucking Viagra do you need to keep up with her, anyway?"

"I beg your pardon?" I asked incredulously.

"Viagra. You know, that little blue pill that makes your little Eddie stand up at attention so that your girl over there can get her kicks?"

I crossed my arms over my chest and glared at him. "I do not need any kind of ED drugs, thank you."

"No? Huh." He paused thoughtfully. "Well, good for you."

I started to say something in return, but was distracted by Bree's "dancing". She dipped down and grabbed at Bella's waist, and then she abruptly stood up, crashing into Bella and causing them to almost topple over.

It was like a train wreck, and I soon found myself laughing along with Jacob as Bella fumbled around and tried to keep Bree from colliding into her again or falling face first into the hard, wooden floor.

"Can you keep a secret?" I implored of him through my laughter.

"I kept your bullshit relationship to myself for two months, didn't I?" he replied, snickering at one of Bree's moves.

"You did," I acknowledged, leaning down a bit so that I wouldn't be overheard. "Bella and I were married in Paris."

Jacob jerked his head back and stared at me in shock. "No shit?"

I nodded. "We eloped. We figured it was the best way."

"How long are you planning to keep it quiet?"

"A couple of months or so. Not long."

"Congratulations," Jacob said sincerely. "I guess you're happy now that you finally got what you always wanted?"

Bella glanced over at me, smiling warmly through her irritation with the pissed disaster of a girl in front of her. There wasn't a way to describe how Bella truly made me feel and being married, no matter how much I'd wanted it, wasn't the reason I was as content with my personal life as I was now. I was content because of the love Bella gave me. I was happy because she had brought that joy into my life.

I finally just answered him as well as I could. "_She_ makes me happy, Jacob. More than I could have ever dreamed of."


	32. Chapter 32

**I just want to say a huge thanks to everyone who signed up on Team Jenny0719 and made FGB a huge success. We raised $600 which was not too shabby since the team was only formed last month and you only needed to donate $5 to join. So thank you, everyone!**

**As always, thanks for the reviews and adds. And thanks to Stratan for being such an awesome beta, as usual.**

**Find me on Twitter (at) JennyB0719**

**Oh, I almost forgot. Bella's dress is modeled after what Emily Blunt wore to this years Golden Globes. Go search :)**

* * *

Chapter 32

**Bella**

Sunday morning arrived, and I woke up wrapped in Edward's arms. He'd held on to me in his sleep, which was incredibly heartwarming, yet annoying at the same time. I struggled to move under his heavy body and finally wiggled free enough to throw his leg off of me with a grunt.

"What are you doing?" he slurred. Between his sleepiness and his accent, it was barely intelligible and extremely funny.

"Get off me!" I giggled. "I can't breathe!"

He squeezed me tighter. "No."

"Come on!"

A crooked smile lifted his lips as he moved away slightly. "I can't get enough of you. Even when I'm unconscious."

I stared up at him as yet another moment of giddying amazement overtook me. That genuine, affectionate smile would always be meant for only me. The rest of the world wasn't lucky enough to know the man lying next to me. He'd only ever let _me_ to see him for what he truly was, and I suddenly felt like we shared this… secret together. He'd never once shied away from me or put up his guard. Instead, he allowed me to discover the enormous heart that he'd kept hidden from everyone. And it was now mine. Completely.

It was mind-boggling to me that he felt so strongly about me. About us. Even though I was allowing myself the happiness he was so willing to give me, I still sometimes couldn't escape feeling as if I was nothing. Like I didn't belong in his world. I was so coarse and graceless and completely unlike the person that anyone expected Edward to fall for. My heart knew I was worthy of him, but my brain couldn't catch up. It was still too hung up on what everyone else thought about me. It had been since we'd said "I do".

I was going to have to work on that. Edward deserved to have all of me at all times, not only on the certain days that I managed to keep my shit together. I needed to build up my walls, strengthen my armor, so that the press' cruelty couldn't affect me like it did. I didn't want it to anymore. I didn't need their approval to be with Edward. But it was exhausting being the constant source of speculation and scrutiny, and I was quickly realizing how much it was taking its toll on m emotionally. Lately, I'd been a wreck.

And Edward had unbelievably taken it all in stride.

He looked at me strangely. "What?"

I shook my head and burrowed my face against his chest. "I just love you, that's all." And it was the truth. Through all the self-doubts I had, that one thing remained constant.

"Well, I'd hope so. You did marry me."

"Stop it," I laughed.

"But it's so much fun to tease you," he replied.

"If you get completely off of me, I'll go make you breakfast and get the paper for you. We'll add another 'B' to the list."

He kissed the tip of my nose, pulling back with a devilish grin. "Another blowjob?"

"No, breakfast in bed, stupid."

"Oh," he pouted, and I snorted a laugh.

Still a little bleary eyed, I shuffled my way out of the house and down the driveway to get the paper for Edward while the dog trailed behind me, stopping to mark all over some poor, unsuspecting tree in the yard. I pushed my ratty hair out of my face and reached into the box, hoping like hell that there weren't any paparazzi lingering on the street to get a shot of me straight out of bed in the morning. A car door slammed, and I groaned.

So much for no paparazzi.

"Bella!"

I jumped with the shriek and closed my eyes, taking in a deep, calming breath. I needed caffeine. No, scratch that. I needed coffee laced with something strong like Everclear to get through this conversation. I wanted nothing more than to turn around and pretend that I'd not heard Jessica screaming at me from across the road, but given how loud she was it was impossible.

"Hi, Jessica," I greeted with a resigned smile.

"Are you ready for tonight?" she asked, bouncing around. How the woman was so bubbly at seven am was beyond me.

"What's tonight?" I asked with a yawn.

She giggled. "The SAG Awards!"

Oh, yes. My first awards show. What _wasn't _exciting about that?

Ugh.

I held up my hands and shook them, hoping to look somewhat thrilled. "Oh, goody!" I replied with a grimace.

"What are you wearing?" she asked, waving at the cameramen down the street. "Hi, guys!"

"No clue," I said honestly, ignoring the distant commotion now that Jessica had acknowledged the photographers. "I'm supposed to have someone bring a few things over later."

"You don't have anything picked out yet? Oh, my God! I hope the good dresses aren't all taken!"

Like I gave a shit.

"Yeah. Me, too," I lied. "It was kind of a last minute decision. Edward and I missed the Golden Globes while we were in Paris-"

"Yeah, that pissed a lot of people off. He was supposed to present an award that night," she said, glancing down at her nails and frowning. "Oh, I chipped a nail already!"

I blinked. "No, he wasn't."

She nodded distractedly. "Best Actress in a Comedy or Musical. Or something."

It had been nowhere in his schedule. And Edward wouldn't have just bailed on an obligation to fly to Paris with me…

Would he?

I glanced back up at the house, where Edward was, in confusion. "Right. Um, well, I'd better get back inside. I have some… things to do before I have to get ready," I said, grasping for an excuse to leave. "I'll see you tonight."

I waved and whistled at the dog before she could argue and headed back up the driveway. I sat the paper down on the counter and hurried back to bed, climbing in next to Edward and burying my head under the covers.

"Where's my paper? And breakfast?" he chuckled.

"In the kitchen."

"But I'm in here."

"I'll get on it in a minute."

I grinned and reached for him under the covers, hoping that I'd be comforted by the feel of him against me. Nerves were already swimming in my stomach with the thought of all those glamorous celebrities getting their first _actual_ glimpse of me dressed up and trying desperately to fit in Edward's world.

And there it was again. That niggling self-doubt I couldn't seem to shake.

"Why are you hiding?" he asked curiously.

"I'm thinking if I sleep the day away, I won't have to go to the awards show tonight."

He laughed.

"We really don't have to go, do we?"

"I'm afraid we do. Well, at the very least, I need to go. I suppose you could stay here if you want." He lifted the covers and stared down at me with a smirk.

"No, I won't do that to you," I whispered.

"Good." He frowned as he studied me closer. "What's the matter with you?"

I shrugged and turned away from him.

"Oh, no. You don't get off that easy." He pushed the covers away and scooted down next to me. "What is it?" he whispered against my neck.

"I…" I felt so stupid. "Nothing."

"Bella-"

"Jessica said you were supposed to have presented at the Globes. Would you seriously miss something that important so that we could jet off to Paris and get married?"

He sighed with my attempt to change the subject. "A rumor, love. Something someone started to stir up gossip about our trip."

I tensed against him. "Oh, no. They're-"

"Relax," he soothed. "No one knows."

I exhaled in relief. All those photographers—more than we had now—chasing us and the relentless phone calls…

"And the answer is yes," he said softly, spinning me around to face him. "I'd have missed it all to marry you."

I bit my lip. "Really?" I asked coyly.

"Really. Now, are you going to tell me what's bothering you? Or do I need to coax it out of you?" he asked, slipping his fingers under my panties.

"Edward," I moaned as his hand sneaked further down.

"Isabella," he replied calmly, abruptly stopping before he reached where I needed his touch the most.

"Fine," I choked out. "I'm nervous."

He pulled his hand back and rested it on my hipbone, causing me to whimper. "It's understandable."

"It is?"

"Of course. You'll be expected to pose, smile, and answer question after question. Then there are the fans that are screaming for an autograph from the street. It can be intimidating," he admitted.

"Yeah?"

He smiled. "Yes. But you'll be with me, so there's nothing to worry about. You don't have to say a word, although, I think you should. You've become… America's sweetheart."

"Whatever," I scoffed.

"You have. In the last few weeks, you've let everyone see how your wit matches your beauty. You're open, honest and snarky as hell. Everyone adores you."

I threw him a disbelieving look.

"All right. I'll prove it," he said, more to himself than me.

He practically leapt out of the bed and strode out of the room. I sat there, gaping after him and trying to figure out what he was doing, while his footsteps echoed throughout the house.

Soon he was back, kicking the door open with a handful of tabloids in his hands.

"No," I whined. "I don't want to read those."

"Look at them." He threw them down on the bed and opened each magazine to its earmarked page, turning each of them so I could read the headlines clearly.

Not a single one said anything negative about us. In fact, all of them praised how "cute" we were, how happy we looked. Spectators gave quotes detailing how polite I was or mentioned some ridiculous comment I'd made to the photographers that they considered to be humorous. But what stood out the most was how _good_ they thought I was for Edward. I… "brought out a light that made the star shine even brighter".

I giggled with the corniness of that statement, even though I was on the verge of tears.

"You see?" he asked with a proud smile. "They love you, just as I always knew they would."

I wiped at the irrational tears that finally fell. I honestly hadn't thought that I needed this kind of acceptance, but it was now glaringly obvious that I did. I knew that I couldn't please everyone, but knowing that the malicious articles—those vindictive comments that had evolved from Tanya's ridiculous claims-were not going to be the standard anymore made me feel so much better about Edward's involvement with me.

His face softened. "Don't cry."

"I… I don't know what to say," I sniffled. "It's-"

"Don't say anything. Just bask in the glory. It's an incredible feeling, isn't it? To know that you came out ahead?"

It's nice," I admitted, allowing myself to grin.

"Don't get too egotistical, love," he teased.

"I'm sorry. I guess I haven't completely adjusted from being an unknown, struggling college student to Hollywood's most successful actor's significant other. Sometimes it feels like I don't fit here," I said, pointing to the magazines, "with you."

"You fit, baby," he replied emphatically. "You fit with me and nowhere else. It merely took everyone around us a couple of months to get their heads out of their arses and see it also."

I pushed myself up to my knees and kissed him, letting it all melt away with the kiss. He slowly laid me back down, breaking away from the kiss and moved down my body.

"Wh- Where are you going?" I giggled.

He pushed my shirt up and trailed wet kisses over my abdomen, causing me to gasp as an electrical current seemed to burn right through me. "I thought that since you made our night out with Jacob so worth my while, I'd return the favor." His eyes were heavy as they met mine. "Is that a problem?"

I shook my head vehemently. "No, no problem."

He flashed a wicked grin against my skin. "I was hoping you'd say that."

* * *

I flailed my arms wildly and took a step back. "Get those God damned tweezers out of my face before I break your fingers!" I shouted at the makeup artist. "Please. My eyebrows hurt," I added, realizing how bitchy I sounded. It wasn't her fault I was a nervous wreck.

Rosalie snickered loudly as she walked back into the room.

"You shut up," I warned turning to face her. "What do you think about this one?"

Her eyes roamed over the shimmering, light gray chiffon dress, bulging as she reached my thighs. "I think Edward will shit if he sees you wearing something see-through on the red carpet."

I whipped my head around and looked at my reflection in the mirror. Sure enough, you could see straight through the fabric from my hips all the way to my toes. I immediately motioned for the stylist to help me out of the contraption and shook my head forcefully.

"Next."

"You've not liked anything I brought. I only have two left." The stylist pointed to where a vibrant, purple silk dress and a light pink tulle dress still hung untouched on the portable rack.

"The purple's out. I'm not trying to be seen from a mile away." I stepped out of the pewter dress and covered my breasts up with my hands, though I really didn't know why. I'd lived with Rosalie for years and it wasn't like this woman throwing dress after dress at me cared anything about my boobs. She honestly looked like she was ready to run away.

Not that I blamed her. I knew I was being difficult, but I really, really couldn't help myself. It was either snap at all these people getting me ready for the event I was dreading or go insane. Call me selfish, but I chose my sanity over making their jobs easy.

She sighed and pulled out the strapless chiffon and tulle gown, gently taking it off the hanger and unzipping the back for me. "If you don't like this one, I don't know what to tell you. I thought you looked amazing in every dress you tried on. Especially the black."

I glanced over at the long-sleeved, floor-length black gown and bit my lip. It was gorgeous. But so plain. I wanted something different. Not necessarily over-the-top and full of drama, but something with a little frill. A touch girly. Something I'd never done before. It seemed appropriate since I'd never walked down a red carpet before.

I curled my lip up as I studied the gown closer. "It's got ruffles," I stated contemptuously, regardless of how it matched what I was wanting down to the last miniscule detail.

"Not many," Rosalie interjected. "It's pretty, Bella. Try it."

I relented with a nod and stepped into the gown. It was tight, sheathing my body almost all the way down to my knees before it finally loosened, subtly flaring out until it reached the floor. Pink tulle was layered over the ivory base of the dress in different directions, with the occasional ruffle starting at my hips and gradually getting larger as they worked their way down the dress. I could barely breathe, but I could tell by the look on Rosalie's face it was the one.

The bedroom door opened and Edward, already dressed in his black tuxedo pants and white shirt, walked in with a tray of food. He stopped short as he took notice of my dress, arching his eyebrow and giving me a slow, sexy smile.

"Pink?" he questioned. "Baby pink?"

I blushed and nodded. "Does it look stupid? There's a black one I liked, but it was just black. There wasn't anything to it at all. It just swept over my shoulders and plunged down my back. I-"

"You're rambling," he chuckled.

"Oh." My blush deepened.

"I think you look wonderful," he said sincerely. "Almost as beautiful as…" He trailed off, glancing over at the stylist and noting her rapt attention. "When we went to the ball."

He winked, and I beamed, catching his meaning. "Thanks. What's all that?" I asked, pointing to the forgotten tray in his hands.

"Dinner. I had nothing to do while you were in here trying on ball gowns, so I thought I'd make us dinner. It's a chicken, broccoli, and pasta dish that Esme always made when time was short. There's enough for Rosalie, if she'd like some as well."

"Nope. My work here is done, so I'm going to go." She walked over to me and kissed my cheek. "I'll be watching you on TV tonight. Kick their asses, Bell."

"Emmett's going to be waiting for me to fall, isn't he?"

She laughed. "Probably." She cast her eyes over to Edward. "Don't give him anything else to make fun of our girl for."

Edward smirked. "I wouldn't dream of it."

Now that I'd finally picked a dress, a flurry of things happened around me. The stylist worked on jewelry—trying to convince me to wear something that wasn't my own—a woman came in and started curling my hair, and the makeup artist tried working around Edward since he was determined to make sure I ate something so that I didn't collapse on the red carpet.

Although, judging by the spiked, nude heels they were planning for me to wear, I might be doing that anyway.

"Is this what it's always like?" I mumbled around my food, trying to ignore all chaos around me.

"No. I've never seen a woman get ready for an event before," he said as he glanced around. "This is all quite new for me, as well."

"Not even, um, Lauren?"

"Not even Lauren," he confirmed. "She liked to do things… alone. I understand why now."

I reached out so I could feel his silky hair. "She was an idiot."

He gave me a rueful smile and pulled my hand down so that he could kiss my palm. "She was smart. She kept her distance all while playing along with the illusion I so blindly let myself believe because I'd wanted it so much. And now I have it."

I wanted to kiss him, but I had to settle for a simple smile since the makeup artist was trying to shove an eyeliner pencil in my face.

Once my hair was curled satisfactorily, my makeup—thankfully—was soft and natural, and I had the earrings Edward's parents had bought me along with my bracelet on, they made me put on my shoes and practice posing with Edward, telling me which side was more "camera friendly" and which poses suited us best, which felt like such a joke.

"Listen, I smile and let Edward put his arms around me all while sticking out my tits. Big deal," I said flippantly, making Edward laugh. "Can we just go now? Before I lose my nerve?"

Edward checked his watch and nodded. "It's nearly time anyhow."

"Thank God."

We helped everyone collect their belongings and made sure all the accessories the stylist had brought over were accounted for. I went to slip a nude clutch into her monstrous duffle bag and was stopped when she shouted at me.

"That's for you to take. It matches."

"What am I going to use it for?" I laughed.

"Put your lipstick in it, your cell phone. That kind of thing."

It was barely the size of my hand and looked completely useless. "No, that's okay. I'll just make Edward keep it in his pockets."

Edward slipped on his jacket and started fidgeting with his bowtie. "I can never get these bloody things right," he muttered into the mirror.

"Here, let me," I murmured, capturing the black tie in my hands and adjusting it so that it was even. "You look really hot, by the way."

One side of his lips lifted as he stared down at me. "As do you. It's going to be quite difficult to keep my hands off you tonight."

I grinned and let my hands fall to his chest. "I get a bit of cover from your jacket." I moved one hand underneath the jacket and grabbed his ass.

"A little warning, please," he laughed, jumping away from me.

I pressed my lips together as I tried not to smile at how uncharacteristically flustered he was. "Sorry."

He pulled me toward him, his demeanor suddenly shifting as he gazed at me intensely. "It's erm… important to me that you're willing to be there for me through all your fears and distaste for the press. I didn't realize how important it was until now. I sometimes wonder how I coped without you." He smiled sadly before continuing. "It was lonely, really, attending these kinds of events for the last two years with someone I barely knew on my arm, pretending to have an interest in them. To _want _them as I want you. I… Everything pales in comparison to you."

Tears filled my eyes, and I took a deep breath—as deep as possible—so that I didn't cry and ruin my makeup. "Thank you," I whispered. It was all I had to say in return.

Edward helped me into the limousine that had been sitting in the driveway waiting for us and sat down next to me, pulling me against him and kissing my hair, jerking back and laughing about how awful my hairspray tasted.

The closer we got to the Expo Center, the more nervous I got. My stomach rolled, and I shook a little next to Edward, who was looking on worriedly, frantically trying to soothe me, but none of his motions were comforting at all. They were too fast, too jerky, to be soothing. His fear just made everything worse. Instead of being the strong, supportive wife I wanted to be for him, I found that I was cowering in the seat next to him in an attempt to get away from the excessive apprehension that was overwhelming me.

We pulled up to the red carpet, and I broke out into a cold sweat. "I'm sorry. I'm trying."

"I know. It's all I ask. Do you need to go home, love? I won't mind."

_Yes, he would…_

I shook my head. "Just push me out of the limo, and I'll be fine."

He laughed. "You won't panic?"

"No." Oddly enough, the feeling that was coursing through me was pure anxiety. No panic was felt at all, because Edward was right by my side. "I'm okay. Come on, they're waiting for us."

Like some unspoken cue had been given, the door opened, and Edward stepped out, smiling and waving to everyone around us. He reached down for me and helped me out of the limo, kissing my temple and hugging me against him as the spectators screamed. It was a living, breathing version of all those photos I'd seen with Rosalie just before I started working for him. His stance was the same; his guard was up. His smile had that cocky edge to it that I'd despised so much, disingenuously flashing itself at everyone around us. Only, I wasn't just some random model chosen to be at his side, the placeholder meant to keep the speculation about his personal life at bay, and he wasn't acting with me.

He bent down to whisper, "I love you," in my ear, and I dissolved right at his feet. Regardless of the way it looked, nothing had changed. He was still my Edward, trapped behind that façade that had overpowered him.

I reached up and cupped his face, smiling up at him and exchanging that secretive smile with him again. "I love you."

I fought the urge to cringe as the screams rang in my ears when he ducked down to actually kiss me. "Your palms are damp."

"I told you I was nervous."

He shook his head and led me to where Zafrina was waiting for us. "You're a star now, baby."

I groaned. "Don't tell me that."

We followed Zafrina through the press line, stopping and giving short interviews with each journalist that was there. When they would pry a little too far into our recent trip to Paris, Zafrina would tap her watch and cut them off, moving us right along to the next reporter waiting for us.

It seemed Edward was the most sought after celebrity there. We posed, we smiled, and Edward excitedly talked about me and his film with everyone he had time for. With each interview, the façade crumbled, and he showed a little bit more of himself and his genuine happiness as time wore on. To say Edward was elated that I was with him seemed to be a vast understatement.

Everyone fawned over me and my dress, and I managed to say a few words in response, although I was so friggin' nervous, I stumbled over my sentences and blushed excessively when I did, which only made Edward chuckle and hold me tighter since normally, I could hold my own. Today was so… surreal, so grand; I had a hard time keeping that firm grip on reality. I could see how easy it was for some people to get swept away by all of this.

We finally made it inside, and I rolled my ankles and shifted on my feet, grateful that the hours long ceremony was coming up soon, and I'd be able to sit for the rest of the night.

We were ushered to our table, served champagne and doted over, all while Edward was given instructions from one of the producers about the segment he was doing halfway through the show. I knew Edward would normally be mingling with the other actors and various people in the entertainment industry, but he stayed with me the entire time, only speaking to those who came to us.

It made me love him even more, if that was possible.

The lights dimmed and so did my nerves as the ceremony began. Actors and actresses took the stage in their general splendor, and until the moment that Jacob walked to the podium, it had all honestly flown right by me. I didn't know who half of these people were here, so I was just content to sit and spend time with Edward.

Edward got up during a commercial break and disappeared through the door that led backstage. I fidgeted in my seat, my nerves suddenly finding root in the pit of my stomach again, until I saw the lights shine down on Edward. He seemed so at ease up there, reading from the teleprompter. I'd never seen him in action, not even on set in Vancouver. He was enamoring. Spectacular in his talent. His eyes flicked to me, and his smile widened as he took in the idiotic grin that was coupled with my pride.

It wasn't long after Edward's return that the champagne got the best of me, and I had to excuse myself from the table and find the bathroom.

I washed my hands and checked my makeup, because even though I was far from the conceited actors and actresses surrounding me, I didn't want to look like a complete jerk on camera.

The door closing echoed throughout the cavernous bathroom, and I heard the click of shoes move toward me. I went to dry my hands and waited for the moment that the woman would appear and I'd have to dive into super-polite flattery to inflate the ego that was already near bursting point, when James turned the corner and stopped, appraising my reaction carefully.

I nearly slammed myself against the sink but caught myself. I threw my used napkins in the trash and, struggling for nonchalance, swallowed hard so that I could speak.

"What the hell is it with you? First a fitting room, now a bathroom?" I shouted. My voice was shrill with fear.

"It's not what you think. I…" He scrubbed his face with his hands. "I can't get anywhere near you to explain. I had to try something. I couldn't even come near you on the red carpet."

With everything going on outside, I hadn't given his presence a thought. Which was incredibly stupid on my part. James was part of the press; he could get into these kinds of events with just a flash of his badge.

"Just let me explain," he continued.

"Explain what? That you're a creepy little perv?"

His jaw clenched angrily. "I am not a perv. Stop calling me that. You think I don't already feel shitty enough looking at you like that as it is?" he yelled back.

"You should! I'm not something you can ogle or covet. I'm Edward's."

"That's not why I feel shitty." His eyes darted around the room, and his face suddenly crumpled in pain. Something in me was compelled to reach out and touch him, but I reined it in before I could make that mistake. "I just want to talk to you."

"So talk." I crossed my arms over my chest.

"Not here. Somewhere… appropriate. I don't want our first conversation being in a public restroom."

Now I was a whole big bunch of confused. "I don't understand," I said slowly. "What is it you want from me?"

"I want to know you. I… I felt this connection to you from the first time that I saw you-"

I scoffed loudly.

"Not like that," he hurried. "Well, it was at first, but then I thought you might have a story for me, so I started following you. And God, did you have a story for me. I'd always suspected that I'd run across you—someone like you—but I never dreamed it'd be like this." He laughed giddily. "You just fell into my lap."

"What are you saying? I'm nothing, James. Just a college student who happened to get involved with a movie star. My life is literally an open book." I took a step forward, unbelievably unafraid of the desperate man in front of me. "What did you find out about me? Is it something my idiotic mother did? I swear to God, I'll kill her if she does something to screw with Edward's reputation."

He blinked, and then laughed at the forcefulness of my statement. "No. It's... Not here. Please?" he pleaded.

I hesitated, warring with something strange within me. My gut told me to do it, but I couldn't understand why. I should be terrified of this man. He'd stalked me, harassed me in a fitting room, and nearly slapped me when he'd teemed with anger. But I couldn't find the fear that was so prevalent before. Now, it was nothing but a morbid curiosity about this connection he claimed he had to me. And I wanted to see what it was exactly that he wanted.

"If I do this…" _Holy shit, I am fucking insane_. "It has to be somewhere public. Edward is coming, as well as my bodyguard. And Sam Uley," I tacked on in a rush. He'd been knee deep in paperwork for over two weeks, slowly weeding through James' history for Edward and me, and was getting blocked at every corner. He deserved to be a part of this, even if I was only selfishly using his muscle and friendship with Jasper as another form of protection for myself.

"Fine," he agreed quickly. "I understand. I've behaved… horribly." His big, brown eyes beseeched my forgiveness.

But I didn't have any just yet.

"Yeah," I replied. "Listen, I need to go before Edward worries about me. I'll um… Edward has your number so I'll contact you if we've decided to talk to you. But in the meantime, stay the fuck away from me. You… you weird me out."

I darted past him and out into the hall, where Edward was pacing rapidly as he waited for me. He saw me and ran over to me, latching on to me as all the air rushed out of his lungs.

"You took so long. I-"

"It's fine. You knew James would be here, didn't you."

"Did he-?"

"Edward. Answer the question," I demanded, evading the conversation. I wasn't ready to talk about what had happened in there yet. I needed to process it all first. If I decided not to go through with meeting James, there was no point in causing my husband to stroke out right now over something I wasn't exactly concerned about anymore.

He held me back and stared at me apologetically. "Yes, I didn't want you to worry."

I nodded. "I'm sorry I took so long. This dress gave me so much shit, it was ridiculous."

A small smile warmed his face and melted away his fear. "Next time, I'll come and help."

I snickered. "I'm sure you'll do more than that."

"Are you sure you're all right?" he asked, leading me back to where the ceremony was in full force.

"I'm fine. I promise."

I snuggled against him, hoping to convey my honesty. And since I was, in fact, fine now that I was with him again, I wanted to enjoy the last part of the ceremony, because there was one thing I knew was certain to come from entertaining the idea of meeting with James.

Edward was going to kill me when he found out.


	33. Chapter 33

**Yeah, so if you didn't get any kind of review reply... don't be pissed. I ignored you all. I'm not answering a thing about James :)**

**Yes, I am aware I'm mean.**

**So I have a new fic that I'm working with Stratan on called While You Were Gone. It's a continuation of a oneshot of the same title by EdwardsBloodType, who graciously let us borrow her concept. **

**http:/ www(dot) fanfiction(dot) net/s/ 6142197/1/ While_You_Were_Gone **

**Go check it out!**

**Thanks to Stratan for getting this back to me when I bugged him about it, and thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter... I promise, all will be revealed soon.**

**

* * *

**Chapter 33

**Bella**

_The man's dick should be cast in gold and treasured forever_, I thought lazily as Edward rolled away from me with a smile of satisfaction. I didn't know if it was because of our compatibility or his experience—something that, even though I knew he'd been _without _for the two years before me, was not a subject I was willing to delve into—but he knew exactly how to work my body. It was like he knew some secret of how to maximize every sensation for me, so that I was nothing but a puddle of orgasmic goo at his hands.

Not that I would ever complain. In fact, I was compelled to do the opposite.

"Jesus, baby, you are…" I sighed contentedly. "So good at that."

"As are you." He kissed the top of my head sweetly. "Come work out with me."

I snorted. "You've got to be shitting me."

"I am not, in fact, 'shitting you'. I want to watch your tits bounce when you run on that treadmill of mine. Can you blame me?" he asked wickedly.

I laughed. "They didn't just bounce enough for you a second ago?"

"No," he replied with an unapologetic shrug. "I'll never get enough."

I glanced over at the clock and groaned. "I have thirty minutes. Then, I need to take a shower so that I'm ready for when Mike's stupid sister gets here for her session."

"If you didn't want to tutor her, why did you agree?" Edward asked curiously as he got out of bed.

"Because I'm a masochist?" I asked as if it were obvious.

"Because you have a generous heart?" he shot back.

"No, I like my theory better."

He shook his head with a chuckle. "Of course you do."

I brushed my teeth and threw on a pair of shorts and a tank top before heading down to the basement with Edward. I stood there, glancing around the stark white room nervously while Edward slid right up next to the weight machine and started throwing these huge, round weights on the bar like they were nothing.

He straightened up and laughed. "You should see your face. You look positively horrified."

"Well, after I nearly took off my toe the last time I was down here, can you blame me?"

"I won't let you take off your toe. In fact, you don't have to lift a thing if you'd rather not. So long as I can enjoy the view." He smirked.

I rolled my eyes and stepped up on the treadmill. "Fine." I waved to my chest. "Stare away."

His smirk widened into a full on, self-satisfied crooked grin. "Excellent."

I jogged at a slow, steady pace, focusing on making sure that my feet didn't collide together at some point since I was doing some major staring of my own. The way Edward's muscles bunched and flexed as he lifted the bar off his chest; the soft grunts that fell from his lips with the strain did nothing to help my already heavy breathing. Before I knew it, I was gasping for air while my heart thundered against my ribs. I stopped the treadmill and doubled over, bracing my hands on my knees and trying desperately not to vomit everywhere.

I wondered idly if this feeling would ever go away. If at some point, I'd find myself accustomed to his beauty and the love he gave me. It was as if a hot spurt of adrenaline shot through me with the simplest, mundane activities along with a wealth of desire that had me wanting to clamber up his muscular body and take him. Again and again until we were both so exhausted we couldn't move.

God, I hoped not.

I heard the clanking of the weights just before Edward's feet came into focus. "You've only run half a mile," he stated, incredulously looking at the display. "Surely you can do more than that."

"Not if I'm watching you I can't."

His eyes twinkled with amusement. "Don't start something you can't finish, Mrs. Masen."

The smile on my face faltered as I realized I was just about to rid him of that good mood entirely. I couldn't keep my run-in with James from Edward; it defied everything we were. We'd vowed from the moment that we became an "us" that we'd always be honest with one another. My reasoning yesterday had been that I hadn't wanted him to freak out at the awards ceremony. Today, I had no reason _not_ to tell him, regardless of how leery I was of his reaction. And I knew if I continued to keep it a secret from him, the guilt would eat me alive.

"What?" he asked in confusion.

"Oh, you're going to be so mad at me," I breathed, sitting down on the floor.

He ran his hand through his hair nervously. "What would I be angry with you for?"

My eyes swam with tears and my throat constricted as I stared up at his apprehensive face. "I lied to you."

He blinked rapidly. "When would have ever possibly lied to me? More importantly, _why_ would you have ever lied to me?"

"Last night at the SAG Awards. About James," I croaked through the lump in my throat.

He tensed. "What?" he repeated.

"He was in the bathroom. I didn't want you to have a heart attack in the middle of an awards ceremony, so I didn't say anything."

"Did he touch you?"

"No."

"I see," he replied, seeming completely unconcerned. Something I knew was total bullshit and made me even more uneasy about his reaction. "What did he want?"

"He wants to meet up with me to explain to me why he's been following me."

"And have you agreed to meet him?" he asked impassively.

"No. I… I told him that if I agreed to it, I wanted you, Emmett, and Sam with me"

He was quiet but paced the floor aggressively.

"But I think I should," I finished weakly.

His steely gaze zeroed in on me for a split second before he blew. "Are you mad?" he roared, and I involuntarily flinched. "You think I've waited all this time for you to come into my life just to turn around and let you go and meet with some… some deranged psychopath? And be hurt in some way? Or worse yet, you could be-"

He cut himself off, flicking his eyes to the row of free weights beside him and in a deliberate, too-calm-for-the-situation movement, grabbed one of the heavier weights and launched it across the room with a feral growl that had a shiver skittering up my spine. I'd seen pieces of his slow-burning temper before—most notably just before he left to film _Rogue_—but this was by far the largest display of negative emotion I'd ever seen from him. There was nothing attractive about this, no white-hot flash of desire that came from the angered snarl and the rage that burned in his eyes.

It was petrifying.

"I guess it's a good thing that I waited until this morning to tell you," I muttered dryly.

He abruptly stopped his tirade and stared at me. "Yes, I suppose it is."

Silence stretched out between us, both of us deliberating what to say or do, before he finally spoke up.

His voice boomed like a clap of thunder in the still night air, causing me to jump a little with the sound. "You are the most intelligent person I know. So why would you ever consider something this… this…? I don't even have a bloody word for it!"

I knew the question had been rhetorical, yet I stupidly answered anyway, keeping my eyes trained on the weight that sat on the floor across the room. "I need to know what he wants, baby. I can't explain why; I just need to know. Don't you think that it's worth knowing what he's been following me all this time for? Even if we do only learn that he's a nutbag?"

"No. Nothing is worth putting you at risk. Ever," he replied sharply. "You aren't going."

I boiled at his forbiddance. "You are not telling me what I can and cannot do… are you?" I asked lowly, gradually getting to my feet.

"Normally, the answer would be no. Today, it's a yes. You're not going near that bloke. He could be dangerous, Bella," he said resolutely.

"Edward, you-" I huffed, unable to form any words with my frustration. "If it were anyone else, do you know what my response to that would be?"

"What?"

"Fuck you."

He gaped as I stormed past him and up the stairs, straight into our bedroom, slamming the door behind me.

The sound of my name being called was muffled by the door, but I studiously ignored it, stomping through the bedroom to gather my clothes and then finally flipping the shower handle so that the steam from the water was pluming out the door. The audacity of him thinking that he had a right to tell me what I could do had me so pissed off, I could hardly see straight. I had half a mind to call Emmett up and meet with James on my own, but the rational part of my brain knew that it would only make things worse between us. And if anything, I hated Edward having any kind of irritation with me. It seemed my sole purpose in life was to make him happy.

While that no longer scared the absolute shit out of me, it didn't make me too pleased with myself. I didn't enjoy the knowledge that I lived my life for Edward now. I wanted to still live for myself, to pave my way through the world because of what_ I_ wanted to do, not to satisfy the wants and desires of the person I fell in love with. It was no wonder why I couldn't decide what I wanted to do with my future, because it was almost as if I was waiting for Edward to make the decision for me.

But no more. Edward would be proud, content with whatever I chose to make of myself. He'd had his success, finally got married. It was my turn to experience that kind of success on my own terms.

With the most supportive husband any girl could dream of.

I stripped my clothes off and stepped into the stream of water, letting the sting of its heat distract me from the sting of furious tears that were filling my eyes.

"Bella." Edward's hand clasped mine, and he stepped into the shower with me, fully clothed. "You can't be serious."

"Serious about what?" I asked, keeping my eyes from his.

"You can't be angry with me for wanting to protect you," he answered simply.

I sighed and closed my eyes. "No. I get it. But you can't just tell me what to do, Edward. You had to know in the back of that brain of yours how I'd respond if you did."

He moved closer to me, pressing his body against mine and dipping his head down to kiss my temple. "I did, and I said it anyhow, hoping that you'd see reason. Obviously, that didn't quite work out for me."

A smile played at my lips. "I'd say not."

I could feel his responding smile against my skin. "Did I frighten you downstairs?"

I nodded slightly.

His hold on me tightened, and he buried his face into my neck. "I'm so sorry," he whispered. "Knowing that you could have been hurt while I was standing just outside the door, along with the thought of you willingly putting yourself in that position again… It terrifies me. To no end. You are the one thing that I lose control of my emotions over. The fear of losing _you_ is sometimes unbearable."

"I guess that could be a little heart-warming. Or really freaky, depending on how you look at it."

He chuckled. "Never freaky, love."

I gave a little noncommittal hum in reply.

He exhaled loudly and spun me around so that he could see my face clearly. "I understand why you kept it from me. It doesn't mean I like it or want it to ever happen again, but I understand your reasoning. You were safe; there wasn't a mark on you, and we were in the middle of a highly publicized event. It would have done neither of us any good if I'd have gotten my hands on that-"

"Weirdo," I finished for him. "I told him he weirded me out."

"That's probably the most apt description of the feeling available. He's very strange." He studied my face for a moment. "You don't think he's a problem? A danger?"

"No. I didn't get the feeling that he wanted to hurt me, Edward. He wanted to tell me something but wouldn't."

"Why ever not? You were right there. Alone. He could have talked your ear off."

I shrugged. "I don't know. He said it should be in a more appropriate place."

"I'm calling Sam," he said with a pensive expression. "I don't want to consider this meeting until he's got all the information possible on Eliot. I even wouldn't mind knowing if he preferred boxers or briefs at this point."

I giggled. "Okay."

"You don't have any inclination of what this 'news' is at all?"

I shook my head. "No idea. I thought maybe it was about Renée, but he said it wasn't. I can't think of anything else. It's definitely not about me, and it's not about Charlie-"

"You know this for certain?" he interjected.

"Well, no," I admitted. "But come on. My dad's the police chief in Forks. He abides every law imaginable, right down to coming to a full stop at each stop sign."

He tilted his head and pushed a wet lock of hair away from my eye. "True. So this was our first, real row. I suppose it needs to be followed by make-up sex," he said naughtily. "Can't have the wife dissatisfied."

I laughed, leaning back so that I was staring up at him. "You just got laid."

"Has that ever stopped me before?" he asked with an arched brow.

"No."

"Then why would it stop me now?"

* * *

**Edward**

Bella's body wrapped itself around me as I drove into her, and she braced herself with her hands on the wall of the shower. With a particularly deep thrust, her head dropped and her cry of pleasure spurred me further. My chest was heavy with guilt and regret for everything that had transpired between us downstairs, my body desperate to erase the memory with an orgasm. The closer we both got to that inevitable release, the more demanding and forceful my movements became.

I ran my hand down her abdomen until my fingers reached her clit. My languorous circles were a sharp contrast to my thrusts, quickly causing her body to react and tighten around me. She buried her face into her arm, shouting obscenities as she came. The feel of her body's release was my undoing. I roughly grabbed her hips, bringing her back against me in time with my thrusts until my body tensed and climaxed. I shuddered once and hugged her against me as we both stood at a standstill and let our bodies come down.

I kissed her shoulder lightly and whispered "I love you" before I moved away from her and into the stream of the shower. We were quiet, contemplative, as we quickly washed off and got out so that Bella could get ready for the tutoring session I'd made her late for. I threw on a pair of jeans and a white t-shirt before shaking the excess water out of my hair and combing my hands through it once so that it wasn't standing up all over the place.

I leaned forward, resting my shoulder against the wall of our bedroom and watched Bella race around the room, finally able to think everything through more clearly. I'd never had such strong, sudden emotional outbursts until I met Bella. I'd always taken everything in stride, analyzed it, dissected it, and then finally acted on what I deemed to be the most sensible response. But now, each time something threatened her well-being—even something small—the terror of knowing that she could be taken away from me in a blink was so severe, that the only way to keep from crumbling at her feet was to use that fear to feed my anger. Anger kept me strong; it kept Bella secure. It allowed me to stay focused and protect her in every circumstance, from something as easily dealt with as the press' continual interest in us to something this… odd.

It was perfectly clear to me that our definitions of what kept her safe were two wholly different things. She was, thankfully, smart enough not to agree to meet with James without some form of protection, but if I'd had my way, she'd have never considered it a viable option in the first place. It was entirely too risky, being in such close proximity with someone whom I considered to be mentally unstable.

But if anything, I'd learned to trust Bella in the last few months. She always let her heart guide her, and while her youth and inexperience could cause her to have the occasional, irrational reaction, she was always, underneath it all, cerebral. She was intuitive, and her perception of others was spot on. I had to believe that if she honestly thought that meeting with James would put her in some sort of jeopardy, she'd have never given him such an evasive answer.

It would have been a firm, absolute no.

I hadn't really tried to speculate James' reasoning for wanting to learn about my wife or wanting to be close to her outside of our conversation in the shower. Everything I came up with was simply… preposterous, so rather than wasting my time on silly assumptions and absurd ideas, I thought it best that I wait for Sam to finally lay out the evidence in front of us and explain to me what was really going on.

Because I was beyond baffled at this point.

Bella stumbled a little as she went over to the nightstand to grab her phone, grunting at the text message and quickly typing in a response.

"Anything I can do to help?" I asked.

She grinned and laughed once. "I think you've done enough this morning, thanks."

"I… Well, I…" I couldn't really formulate a response to that. "I suppose I did."

The buzzer signaling that someone was at the gate sounded throughout the room, interrupting our conversation.

"Shit," Bella hissed."My hair is still dripping everywhere."

"I'll let her in and show her to the study. You dry your hair," I said softly.

She nodded and chewed on her lip. "So we're okay?" she asked uncertainly.

I reached out for her and enveloped her in my arms. I wanted to be upset with Bella for not telling me immediately that she had spoken to James, but I simply wasn't. By keeping me in the dark, so to speak, Bella had saved me from potentially doing something extremely damaging to my career. Her foresight had kept me from streaking past her and showing James just how intolerable I was of him lurking about and scaring Bella. And now, I was finding that I was grateful that Bella had waited until this morning to say something.

I bent down to kiss her, smiling against her lips at the sound of her sweet sigh. "I thought I made it perfectly clear that we were 'okay' in the shower."

"I know, but…"

"No buts," I whispered. "The situation isn't ideal, and we don't completely agree on where to go from here, but I'm all right with that. So long as you're safe. We can figure it all out together."

She nodded, and I reluctantly released her and started for the kitchen, only to stop short at the door.

"What's her name?"

"Jane Newton," Bella answered over her shoulder.

I hurried to the security panel, rolling my eyes as the buzzer sounded again with this Jane's impatience.

"Sorry," I hastily called into the intercom. "Could I just see your ID for verification, please?"

She grumbled with frustration and dug into her bag on the passenger's seat. "Here," she said snottily, holding her driver's license out to the camera.

I quickly matched the ID with the face of the annoyed girl outside my gate and gave very serious deliberation over turning her away since it looked as if Bella would strangle her for her petulance and attitude before the day was over. Bella had enough to deal with regarding James; she didn't need to add tutoring some spoiled brat who didn't care about her studies to the list of things going wrong for her at the moment.

"Thank you," I said politely, ignoring the roll of eyes that accompanied the replacement of her ID inside her wallet and buzzed her through.

I threw my wet clothes in the washer and grabbed a bottle of water while I waited for Jane to reach the door. The doorbell chimed, and I went to answer, shoving Samson away so that he didn't frighten her, and was met with someone who looked… well, much like a child. Which made me feel like I'd just aged twenty or so years.

She was pale, incredibly small and waifish, barely coming to my chest. Her blonde hair was pulled tightly back away from her face and her wide, green eyes were rimmed heavily with black. She wore all black as well; the hooded sweatshirt she had on engulfed her, stopping at her knees. Exasperation flickered over her face before her expression turned contemptuous.

It seemed that no one in the Newton family was a fan of mine.

"Where's Bella?" she sneered.

"She's running a little late," I responded, ushering her inside.

There it was again, that flash of unwarranted hostility and annoyance. "She's late?" she huffed. "What the fuck? I have a paper due tomorrow!"

I bit back a growl and offered no explanation to this girl. "I'll show you to the study," was all I said in return.

I got Jane settled and did my duty as host, asking if she wanted a drink or needed anything else, and then abruptly left the room. I couldn't imagine being trapped inside that room with her for_ any_ amount of time. Not even to keep her company while she waited for Bella.

Bella came rushing toward me, looking down as she adjusted her shirt over her jeans, and slammed into me.

"Oh, sorry, baby," she giggled. "Didn't see you."

"She's in the study," I stated flatly.

"What's wrong?" she asked, blinking up at me.

I pulled at my hair a little. "Just… good luck. I'm going out for a bit. I'll see you in a little while."

I quickly kissed her goodbye and walked in the opposite direction. I let Samson out so that he didn't disturb them while they worked and shoved my wallet into my back pocket. I grabbed the keys to the R8 and within minutes, I was driving down the freeway and headed toward the Apple Store.

I quickly parked and got out, smiling at the gawkers as I made my way to the door. I strode determinately to the display of iPads and examined them while everyone stood back and watched, predictably murmuring to one another and snapping pictures. I knew it was irrational, this desire to suddenly buy Bella a toy. It wasn't as if I wanted to buy her forgiveness. I already had that. I simply wanted to give her something without reason, and while flowers would likely be appreciated, I had the means to do more.

I spoke to the salesgirl in detail about the capacities of each iPad, which was actually quite entertaining since she was so struck by my presence, and eventually made it out of the store with one and a few accessories to go with it after signing a handful of autographs.

And slammed straight into the crowd of paparazzi waiting for me.

I laughed humorlessly and shook my head. I couldn't even run out to buy Bella a sodding gift without someone alerting the media of my whereabouts. Now, I was rushed to get the thing wrapped and home before someone could call Bella and spoil the surprise.

I stopped at a stationary shop a few blocks away and dashed inside to have everything wrapped, avoiding the ridiculous questions that were being hurled at me and answering only a select few with the excuse that I was in a hurry.

Like I was going to tell them that I was purchasing my wife—or to them, my fiancée—a random, just-because-I-felt-like-it gift.

I let the elderly woman behind the counter pick out the paper, which was a horrible idea since Bella's gift came back in covered in flowers and rainbows and such and topped with a monstrous pink bow. It looked almost as if I were presenting it to a child for her birthday; it simply needed a few sparkles and glitter to make it perfect. I pressed my lips together so that I didn't laugh, knowing that Bella would hate it and have something snarky to say about it. But thanks to the paparazzi, I didn't have time to take it somewhere else, and I was too bloody nice to ask her to rewrap it. So I simply thanked her for wrapping the gift and for her compliment of my acting skills and left.

I made it home without further incident, noting that Jane had already left, and placed the gift on the counter.

Bella came screeching to a halt as she rounded the corner and exhaled with relief.

"Oh, my God. That girl was horrible!"

"I know. I felt awful for leaving you here with her, but I was selfish enough to flee anyhow."

"Hold me," she whined with a laugh, shuffling over to me.

I took her into my arms and kissed the top of her head. "It'll be all right," I murmured.

"No, it won't. She expects me to do all the work for her. 'You're my tutor, that's what I'm paying you for'," she mocked.

"I'm to assume that went over well?"

"Ha. I told her that she wasn't paying me jack, and it was actually my job to teach her how to do the shit on her own. And that I was pretty sure that if she didn't like it, she could find her way back to the door and ask someone else."

I chuckled. "Well, if it helps, I got you something while I was out."

She stared up at me with a frown. "What?"

I shrugged. "Just something that I thought you might find useful."

She moved away from me and peered over at the wrapped gift behind me, reaching out to finger the ribbon and snickering. "You didn't pick this out."

"No. I told the elderly woman that it was for you and that I was sure whatever she picked out was sufficient. Obviously, that was a bit of a mistake."

"You think? It's like a fairy threw up all over it."

"It is rather bad," I conceded. "Just open it, will you?"

I leaned on the counter nervously and waited as she ripped off the bow and tore into the hideous paper. She glanced down at the iPad and blinked in disbelief.

"You went out and got me an iPad? What for?"

"I thought it might be useful. There's a bag there with all the accessories I bought you." I pointed to the gift bag sitting next to the door. "Erm, there's a case, a wireless keyboard-"

"But… _why'd_ you get me this?" she asked in confusion. "I mean, it's not my birthday or a holiday… And it's not an anniversary of any kind. Unless you're trying to count the weeks that we've been together, which is not only stupid, but I'm pretty sure that even your romantic brain wouldn't think of stuff like that."

"No reason," I said awkwardly. "I bought it because I wanted to give you something."

She let her eyes move away from the box and over to me. "You're nervous."

"A little." I smiled. "You've only interrogated me since I mentioned something about it."

"I'm sorry. I really do like it." She paused and flashed an excited grin. "Help me get it set up and start downloading apps?"

"Of course." My mobile buzzed in my pocket, and I nearly dropped it when I saw that it was Sam calling.

"It's Sam."

Bella's jaw dropped before she quickly righted herself again. "Answer it!"

"Yes?" I barked it into the phone and cringed as I realized how terrible it sounded.

_Fucking nerves._

I took a deep breath and tried again. "How are you, Sam?" I asked, feigning nonchalance.

"Great. Thanks. Listen, I've found something you and Bella will want to know about James."

Panic lanced through me as I caught sight of Bella's anxious expression. I smiled through it in an effort to relax her, and was welcomed with a small, confused lifting of her lips in return. She turned her attention to the box on the counter and started reading the specifications to distract her.

"What is it?"

He was silent for a few beats. "Listen, I'd rather tell the two of you together. I'm not sure how Bella would react to it."

"Sam…" I cautioned.

"Edward, just… Could the two of you meet me tomorrow morning?"

I swallowed hard. "Sure. Where?"

"Same place as last time? Say, nine?"

"Nine's fine. We'll see you then."

I hung up the phone and stared blankly at Bella, replaying the conversation over in my head.

"What?" she demanded.

"He's got something. We're to meet him in the morning."

"He does?" she gasped.

I nodded. "Looks like you'll be missing class."


	34. Chapter 34

**Sorry for the delay... I actually wrote the FGB outtake for this instead of writing the actual chatper since I gave myself a deadline to get all my FGB obligations in by 8/31. I also wrote half of this through a migraine, so it may not be my best work. JSYK**

**Thanks for the reviews and adds this last week. If you haven't noticed yet, I posted the outtake I did for Fics4Nash in Samson's POV in a separate story thread for TMWCBM. I still have a couple other outtakes to finish - which includes an outtake in James' POV, if you're interested. Hopefully, they'll both be posted soon.**

**Looking for an AU fic and like my writing? Check out While You Were Gone... it's a fic I'm doing with Stratan and is getting some decent buzz. (Yay, right?)**

**Summer Nights readers... Wanna go through your fave chapters again? There's a readalong scheduled on 8/9. Lots of sexin, Eli, and crazy Jane to be had. Got anything specific you want to see on Twitter? PM me, and I'll try to include it in the line-up!**

**You can also let me know on Twitter (at)JennyB0719**

**As always, thanks to my super psychic beta, Stratan, who anticipates all my needs with all my fics... Hahaha ;)**

* * *

Chapter 34

**Bella**

As Sam slid the creamy yellow file folder toward me, my heart jumped into my throat. It seemed so harmless, yet so lethal at the same time. The papers were stacked thickly inside, showing me how much research and investigation Sam had done for me. Everything about James Eliot was inside; his place of birth, college transcripts, where he frequently hung out. It all was sitting there, waiting for me to lay it all out and solve the riddle. The answers I wanted were all right in front of me, and now, I couldn't bring myself to look at them.

Because it would change everything.

I swallowed hard and let my hand creep out to open the folder, only to snatch it back into my lap. I wrung my hands together and tried to remember to breathe, but even though I was concentrating on the deep, even breaths of air moving in and out of my body, I still felt like I was suffocating.

"I can't."

Edward wrapped his arm around me comfortingly. "Yes, you can."

I shook my head obstinately. "No. I can't. I mean, my God, what if-"

Sam interrupted me. "Bella, no one says you have to look at this. I can just take the file back to the office and destroy it if you want."

My eyes narrowed suspiciously. "You wouldn't tell Edward what it was over the phone because it was _that_ important to tell me in person and now you're… just willing to take it back with you without me ever looking at it?"

Sam smiled. "Well…"

"I'm confused. It's either so bad I need the two of you around to call the ambulance when I have a heart attack, or it's no big deal at all and you have some kind of flare for the dramatic. Which is it? Because frankly, both of those options piss me off."

Edward coughed a laugh next to me.

Sam's smile widened. "I see why Jasper and Alice like you so much." He took a sip of his coffee before continuing. "All right, here it is. It's important information. Information that could, if you choose to let it, change your life. But there's no danger if you never know. James is, for the most part, a very balanced individual."

"How is that possible?" Edward asked in shock.

"Well, it seems that until he started digging into Bella's background, James Eliot's only offenses were minor traffic infractions," Sam replied. "No more than your average citizen."

"What?" I shouted, quickly looking around and slinking into my seat a little when I noticed that my little outburst had drawn the attention of everyone around me.

"Okay, here's the deal," Sam elaborated with my reaction. "Eliot was attracted to you. Correct?"

"At first." I looked to Edward for confirmation. "Right?"

He nodded. "He thought you were… hot."

"And your interaction with Edward caused some… curiosity and skepticism about your _professional _relationship," Sam continued.

"So he started digging into my background," I finished.

"Yes. It was his job to follow the two of you and look into your background information. It was his job to follow through on the potential story. But it turned into more than that because, Bella, he found out something about you. Something I imagine he'd wondered about for a long time. Generally speaking," he added.

Edward leaned forward with a scowl. "Enough with the mystery, Sam. What does he want with her?"

Sam chuckled. "I know. I sound ridiculous, but everything is right there in front of you. If Bella wants to know, she can open it."

I grumbled my agreement. It would have been nice to have Sam simply tell me—after all, once you heard it, you couldn't take it back—but I understood why he didn't. It was only his job to gather the information. What I chose to do with it made no difference to him, so long as he was paid.

"Are you going to look or not, love?" Edward whispered, staring down at me intensely.

I couldn't debate on it any longer; it was pointless, and I'd been so eager to know everything before, hesitating now seemed stupid. So I made a split second decision. I'd hate myself if I let Sam take all this information and destroy it before finding out why James was so interested in meeting with me— in getting to know me.

I flipped open the file folder as a silent answer, spreading the documents out before me. Born in San Francisco. He was two years older than me. He'd once lived in a tiny little apartment in the Valley. All these facts were at my disposal, and I soon found myself immersed in it all.

"Jesus, Sam. You got everything," I breathed, fumbling through his credit report.

"Yep."

I passed the document off to Edward and picked up another one.

_Adoption._

The word jumped off the page and caused my heart to sprint uncontrollably.

"No."

Sam's face softened with concern. "Where are you?"

I held up the fantastic California State Record of Adoption that was in my hand. "Here," I answered with an artificial calm.

"That was the hold up," he stated. "Details about closed adoptions are sometimes a pain to get. This one gave me a ton of issues."

"Holy fuck," Edward cursed quietly as he scanned the document.

"Yes, 'holy fuck' pretty much covers it, baby," I said dryly in response to his uncharacteristic outburst.

He squeezed the back of my neck once and managed a smile. "Quiet. It took me by surprise."

I forced my eyes back to the page and studied the legal jargon carefully… until I got to the important part. My mind skid to a halt as I read the two people listed as James' biological parents.

"The father's name is blank," I said dumbly.

Sam reached over and fumbled through the papers. "It is. So I did some research. James' mother went to school in none other than Forks, Washington. Can you guess what year she graduated in, Bella?" he asked kindly, holding out a copy of her diploma with a picture paper clipped to it.

I yanked the picture out from under the paper clip so I could study it better. Two people walking down the hall, hand in hand, in all their eighty's glory. They looked so carefree, happy. And then I recognized the boy in the picture.

Everything around me went black as I froze and stared at the one person I _never _thought would have some sort of skeleton hiding in his closet.

_Boo._

I shook my head violently and threw down the picture, shoving my chair back away from it as if it was on fire.

"No. He would _never_."

I refused to believe it.

"Bella?" Edward asked in alarm. "Are you all right?"

"I do not share DNA with that freak," I said between my teeth.

I snatched up my purse and rushed to the Aston Martin, pushing past the paparazzi that miraculously appeared out of nowhere again while I frantically dug the spare set of keys out of it.

I was so close to breaking down, but I would_ not_ do it in front of the cameras.

My hand shook as I pulled the keys out of my purse, and I unlocked the door just as tears filled my eyes. I threw the door open and slammed it shut before I curled up into a ball in the backseat and let it all finally hit me.

_Charlie Swan had another child. _

God, my father had always seemed so responsible. He'd slipped up with my mother, but he'd made it a so-called right when he married her. He'd wanted me, even though he was only twenty. If this was true—if James Eliot was my brother—it changed everything I knew about my father. It made him…

No. No. No.

There was no way. It seemed so wrong—so impossible—but the proof was undeniable. I'd seen it myself. Maybe this was the work of denial, but it felt like a lie.

Edward came rushing out of the building with the file folder in his hand. He made no attempt to hide his scorn for the paparazzo's intrusion of the moment as he shoved past them, shouting something I couldn't understand but judging by the look on his face, it wasn't the niceties he usually made with them.

He opened the car door and threw himself inside, glancing back at me as he threw the folder down, and then somehow managing to get his long limbs over the console. He sat next to me and pulled me up, staring at me with indecipherable concern.

"Are you all right?" he repeated.

"You know they're going to make it look like we got in a fight. 'Trouble in Paradise' or whatever the clichéd line is."

"I don't bloody care what they print about us," he shot back. "Are you all right? I'm not you asking again."

I nodded and wiped the tears off my face. "It's not true. It can't be."

"Bella…" He looked almost pained to argue with me about it.

"No, really, Edward. I know what it looks like. But I don't believe it. My dad wouldn't do that. It's Charlie Swan, for God's sake. Forks, Washington's very own Chief of Police. He makes mistakes, yes. Hell, look at me. I'm living proof of that statement. But he's the most levelheaded man I know. Even more than you."

"I'm not all that levelheaded, Bella," he mumbled.

"Not so much when it comes to me, lately. But you are." I grabbed his face. "Charlie wouldn't have done this twice in his life. I _know_ it."

"We all have our rebellious moments, love. You should speak to your father before you set yourself up for disappointment."

"I don't need to talk to Charlie. James and I can have a DNA test done here in LA. I'll prove it that way."

"Talk to your father," he said firmly. "Don't keep something this big a secret from him."

I opened my mouth to protest but wound up just nodding and throwing my head on his chest while I calmed down.

"So what's next?" Edward eventually murmured. "Gallons of ice cream? A day at the spa with Rosalie? I'm completely at a loss here."

"But you always know what to do."

He kissed my temple. "I've never had to deal with my wife learning she has some potential long-lost brother. Forgive me if I'm a little out of my element."

I giggled a little. "Well, that makes two of us."

"Really, though, baby. What are you going to do?"

I chewed on my lip. "I want to spend the day with you, but I think I need Rosalie. She..."

"No explanation needed. I'll run you by her flat and pick you up when you're ready."

I shook my head. "Stay."

His eyes widened with mock horror. "You want me to stay and do girl talk? Are you mad?"

I rolled my eyes. "Edward."

He chuckled. "Just promise there will be no tweezing, waxing, or painting my toenails. I get enough of that rubbish when I'm getting ready to film."

"They paint your toenails?"

"Oh, you know what I mean. Now, get in the front before I shove you up there and buckle you in myself."

I batted my eyelashes and threw him the best possible teasing grin I could through my… upheaval. "Yes, master."

I crawled back up to the front and stared out at the mass of photographers trying to get a decent shot of us through the tint of the windows. I was vaguely aware of Edward starting the engine and laying on the horn a few times as he crept through the crowd, but I had checked out. I watched the scenery finally start to blur blankly, too… well, there wasn't really a word for what I felt.

We pulled into a parking space, and I immediately realized I hadn't called to see if Rosalie was even home. I scanned the parking lot and breathed out a sigh of relief when I spotted her car a few spaces over. I went to open the car door, only for Edward to reach over and stop me. I turned my head and was met with green eyes, wild with worry.

"Bella-"

"Stop acting like I'm going to fucking break," I snapped. "I was just thinking that I hadn't bothered to check if Rose was home or not. I don't need you coddling me, Goddamn it."

Anger flickered across his face, but he merely nodded once before quickly sitting back up and letting me get out of the car.

We silently walked toward the building, unable to speak because of all the commotion around us. Although, honestly, it seemed like Edward probably wasn't going to speak much anyway for fear of getting his head bitten off again, and I couldn't blame him.

When we reached the door, I went to ring the bell, only to abruptly turn around and throw myself at Edward. He held on to me tightly and kissed the top of my head while I did nothing but sob and cry out some garbled apology for being so shitty to him a few minutes ago, because he hadn't deserved it. I was just so… mad. Confused. He murmured that it was okay, and I jerked my head back so that I could see him and found myself plunging my tongue into his mouth.

Desire raced through my blood as he recklessly threw me against the wall, pressing himself into me. I moaned loudly into his mouth and tried to wrap myself around him, only to find that he blocked my every move.

His control infuriated me. "I need you," I groaned, grabbing his hair and tugging on it. I needed to forget the uncertainty, the fear that my life had the potential to change so dramatically. Again. In such a short amount of time.

Edward's touch was the only thing that could drive it all away, even if was only for a little while.

"No," he rasped. "Not like this. Not because you're trying to run away from the situation."

I growled. "I hate that you know me so well."

He smiled warmly. "You don't."

I tipped my head up and kissed him before I turned around to face the door. I rang the bell and listened to the footsteps move across the floor and glanced up at Rosalie's look of surprise before forcing some kind of horrific smile on my face.

"Shit, what happened?" she asked immediately, skipping over any kind of greeting as her eyes darted between Edward and me.

"Long story. Got time?"

"All day. Get in here."

Edward and I followed her inside and into the living room. Emmett came out of the kitchen with a bag of chips in his hand as I collapsed on the familiar, brown leather chair. One look at me, and he threw the bag down on the bar and stormed over to Edward.

"What the fuck happened?"

"We met with Sam," Edward answered, sitting on the armrest and running his fingers through my hair.

God, that felt good.

Rosalie stared at us both. "Well?" she prompted.

"I need to have a DNA test done," I replied. "They can compare our markers, or whatever they're called."

"What? What do you need a DNA test for?" she asked.

Emmett was right there with me. "No fucking way."

"Way," I sighed.

"Well, so much for thinking you had one normal parent."

"Emmett! Come on, he's not James' father," I argued.

"Says Maury Povich," he muttered.

I shot him a look.

"What?" he demanded. "It's like an episode of Maury. _You_ are not the father!"

Rosalie shook her head and flailed her arms around irritably. "Wait! James is your brother?"

I nodded. "That's what it seems like."

She fell back against the couch with a somewhat dazed look. "Jesus."

"So what are you going to do?" Emmett asked.

"She's going to call her father and talk to him about this," Edward answered. "If her… instincts are correct, there's been some mix up somewhere. And while I can't speak for Charlie, I can speak for myself. I would want to know if some random ex-girlfriend had gotten pregnant at seventeen and never bothered to tell me about it, especially if it looked like I was the one who'd… done the deed."

"Edward-"

"He's right, Bella," Rosalie said, cutting me off. "Not only do you owe it to your father to be honest about what you know, you're already not speaking to your mother. And I know you consider Edward's family your own, but you can't ruin the only true parental relationship you have left by keeping this a secret."

"Yeah," I grumbled. "But I don't see the point. It's just going to come out that it's total bullshit."

"Maybe," she allowed. "But you still need to tell him."

Emmett grinned. "Buck the fuck up, Bella."

The all waited expectedly for me to do something. I sat there for the longest time, trying to figure out why they were all sitting there staring at me and what the hell they wanted.

And then it finally dawned on me what it was.

"Right _now_?" I shrieked.

"There's no time like the present," Emmett replied with a grin.

"Jesus, you're full of stupid little expressions and idioms today, aren't you?"

"If it means you're going to call your dad, I'll take that as a compliment," Emmett responded.

"Yeah, you would." I huffed. "Fine. Give me my phone. I'll call him. _Right now_."

* * *

**Edward**

Bella sat in the hard, gray plastic chair, chewing at her nails nervously. The heels of her feet bounced off the carpet rapidly, causing Charlie to throw her an irritated look.

"Bella. Would you please calm down?"

She stilled and narrowed her eyes at Charlie. "I'm sorry," she spat, "but I'm a little bit nervous since I'm about to get my cheek swabbed with you because you couldn't keep your-"

She cut herself off before she could say something further.

Charlie groaned. "I thought we went over this. I'm_ not_ this guy's father. You were fine three days ago when I agreed to fly down here and have this paternity test. Why are you so upset now?"

"Because what if you're wrong?" she asked, blinking away tears.

He sighed. "I'm not wrong."

"Yeah, well, I wouldn't know since you're being so fucking secretive about the whole damn thing."

"Watch your mouth. I don't care if you're an adult or not; I won't be spoken to that way."

Bella threw her head back against the wall in frustration. "Fine."

Charlie continued. "I'm being 'secretive about the whole damn thing' because I really don't want to share my practically non-existent sexual history with my daughter."

"Non-existent?" she scoffed. "How is that even possible?"

"I'd imagine it's because of the same reason you've only slept with Edward and that Crowley kid," he replied.

Bella's mouth dropped open in shock. "How do you know about Tyler?"

"I'm your dad. I'm a cop. Do the math."

I raked my hands through my hair. The entire situation had just taken a nosedive straight into to disaster. Not only was Bella stressed out, but she was now arguing with her father also.

"How dare you check up on me!" she shouted indignantly. "I'm an adult!"

"Could we please not cause a scene?" I pleaded. "The last thing we need is for this to be all over the news tonight because another patient overheard the conversation."

Charlie nodded once. "Sorry, Edward."

"Not your fault," I mumbled. It was my wife who couldn't keep it down.

"I check up on you because you live in LA, and I worry. That's all," Charlie said to Bella sincerely.

She exhaled sharply. "Yeah, I get it. But I still think I deserve to know about this chick you dated when you were seventeen that just _miraculously_ popped out a baby a few months after graduation."

"All right," Charlie said, straightening up. "You want to know? Fine, I'll tell you. Lynn—that's this 'chick' you keep referring to—was my high school girlfriend. Like most high school kids, we did a lot of… experimenting. But your mother was my first. My only, if I'm being honest with you."

Bella's eyes widened in shock. "What? You… you… I mean, you never-" shestuttered.

"Nope. Not since."

Dear God, the man was a saint.

"But _why_?"

"Bella... Your mother really messed me up when she left. I won't go into details, but it took me a long time to get over it. Now that I'm finally past it, no one interests me." He shrugged, feigning nonchalance, but the mottling of his cheeks gave him away. "I've lived this long without it; I can wait until it feels right to do it again."

"Yeah. Renée has that gift," she answered wryly. "It's the gift that just keeps giving."

"You could have come to live with me, Bella," he said softly. "I'd have taken you in a heartbeat."

"Thanks, but Renée needed me here. You know as well as I do that someone had to keep her from being thrown out on the street."

Charlie nodded. "So now you see why it's impossible for me to be James Eliot's father." He glanced around the room uncertainly. "He's not going to randomly show up during this, right?"

"No. Sam assured me James would be traveling upstate to interview someone for a piece he's working on," I answered.

"Good. Has he taken the paternity test yet?"

"No. He _supposedly_ will in the morning when he gets back." I had my suspicions, though.

Charlie gave me a questioning look with my tone. "So he knows."

"Yes."

"How did that go?"

How was I to describe the phone call I made two days ago informing James that Charlie Swan was not his father, and therefore, there was no excuse for him to continue following Bella around? The reaction I got; the furious demand to hand Bella the phone so that he could talk to her? He may have been able to convince Bella that he was harmless and misunderstood, but I knew how incredibly cunning he was.

So I'd played along. I'd pretended to be sympathetic to his plight, his feelings. I'd explained to him that Chief Swan knew his biological mother but claimed there was no way he could be his father, and that he and Bella both had offered to have a DNA sample taken to provide proof of this fact to him. I'd been apologetic yet firm; he knew there was absolutely no way I'd let him come anywhere near Bella again.

It was all so bizarre. I didn't care what his records stated; there was something increasingly unsettling about James Eliot's behavior. I wasn't sure if it was a mental health issue, or if he was just that inexorable when it came to getting the "story" he claimed Bella had for him. Even if she had something hidden in her past deemed "newsworthy", there was no way I was letting him access to that kind of information. Ever.

"Interestingly," I finally said.

Charlie laughed. "I bet. I feel kind of bad for the kid."

I glanced over at Bella, puzzled by Charlie's statement. It was nothing like what I'd expected to come from him.

"Has she told you nothing?" I asked him.

I knew from the way she glanced away and the blush that rose to her cheeks that she'd not told Charlie about James' odd behavior.

"Bella," I groaned.

Charlie's eyes darted in between us. "What did she not tell me?"

"Edward-" Bella began.

"Don't," I said sharply. "I can't believe you didn't tell your father—the policeman—that James had been stalking you."

"He what?" Charlie asked, abruptly leaning forward. His face grew red with anger. "And you wonder why I worry about you?"

Bella sank down in her chair and muttered something under her breath.

"What the hell is going on?" he demanded from me.

"The man is… peculiar, at best," I told him. "There's not any specific threat to Bella, but he simply…" I trailed off, thinking of how to describe it. "Concerns me. It could be because I'm fiercely protective of her, but I highly doubt it."

"What's he done?"

"Well, he's a reporter. An extremely ruthless, intuitive reporter. He targeted Bella a while back, positive that she was hiding something that would make a good story. Now you and she are getting DNA samples taken. I find the whole situation very contrived."

"Are you saying James knew all along?" Bella asked, stunned.

"It's possible, love. Who's to say that he didn't have this information before you came into the picture? That he knew of his biological mother, her history, and the men that she was involved with at the time of his conception? How do we know he's not spoken to her already before? I just find this too big of a connection between the two you for it to be purely coincidental."

Charlie scrubbed his face with his hands. "Christ, Bella. You're being scammed."

Bella gaped for a moment before righting herself. "I take offense to that, Dad."

"I don't mean it offensively, but you're young and incredibly inexperienced when it comes to how manipulative people can really be. Not only that, but this can honestly happen to anyone. Frankly, I feel lucky that Edward has so much experience with these assholes."

I smiled and shook my head a little. Bella was so much like her father, it was sometimes frightening.

"So now what?" Bella asked me.

"Now, we keep our guard up. We have a few days before the test results come in. Once James realizes that this angle of getting to you has been blocked, he'll look for other ways to get to you. And we have a secret that could potentially be disastrous for us—privacy wise—if he gets a hold of it and misconstrues it."

"We're married," she whispered. "Shit."

"Exactly. I think we need to be proactive and get the word out before he does."

"A preemptive strike," Charlie said with a nod. "Sounds like a good idea to me."

"So I'll discuss it with Zafrina, see what we can come up with. We might be able to get away with a brief statement that we eloped in Paris, or we may need to do an interview. I'm not really sure, at this point."

"No more interviews. I don't want to get dressed up again."

"So don't," I told her. "It can be candid. We wear our regular clothes, talk to the journalist, let the photographer take a few photographs of us, and forget about it."

"But it's still going to cause an increase in the paparazzi following us, isn't it?" she asked, biting her lip.

"Most likely. We're interesting to them. We're genuinely happy, and by everyone's standards—including my own—we rushed down the aisle. There'll be speculation, more than there was before. Which brings up another subject: moving. When will you start seeing acceptance letters in the mail?"

"Or rejection," she added with a grin.

"Not happening, love."

"Um, a few weeks, I guess. Why?"

"I think we need to decide where we'd like to move to as soon as possible. It might help deter the paparazzi if they have to travel to get to us."

"You think?" she asked hopefully.

_Not really._

I shrugged. "It couldn't hurt," I said instead.

"You're planning to move?" Charlie asked. "Where to?"

"I don't know," Bella replied. "I suggested Oxford, but Edward wants me to visit and be sure of my decision before we start looking at houses."

"England?" Charlie exclaimed. "You're moving her to England?"

"Not necessarily," I responded warily. "She applied to ten different universities."

"Relax, Dad. You'll still see me," Bella said with a laugh.

Charlie and Bella were called back into an exam room, abruptly cutting off our conversation. I followed behind Bella with the Blackberry, texting Zafrina and telling her that we needed to meet with her as soon as possible, without giving any details away; she'd know what I was referring to, anyway. I then turned the mobile on silent and slipped it back into my pocket so that I could focus on Bella.

The nurse led us into a plain white room and asked Charlie and Bella to sit down while she readied the testing kits. Within minutes, their samples had been given and sealed, ready to ship off to the lab. They were then informed that it would take five days for the results to be processed from the time James submitted his sample.

If he ever did, that is.

Charlie was scheduled to fly back to Forks this evening, so we only had time to grab a quick bite to eat before we had to drop him off at the airport.

Even though he'd just seen Bella at the wedding, he spent every minute catching up on things happening in Bella's life. He asked her about her classes, Rosalie and Emmett, and even asked how Renée was doing. You could see how much he loved Bella and missed her, and how much he regretted having to leave when it was time to head to LAX.

I pulled to the curb and got Charlie's carry-on bag out of the trunk while he and Bella said their goodbyes.

"I wish I could stay longer," he said with an awkward smile. "But I have to get back."

Bella nodded. "I know. Work."

"Yeah."

"Promise me you'll let me know if this James character bothers you again." He shook his head. "No, Edward will call me. I know you'll try to keep it from me again."

Bella rolled her eyes. "Dad, I'm fine. I have Edward and Emmett. Edward would hire a bunch of Secret Service agents to keep an eye on me if he needed to."

"I've thought about it," I chuckled. "More than you know."

Charlie seemed mollified. "All right. I'll talk to you soon, then."

He gave Bella a hug and took his bag from me. "Keep her safe."

"I will," I vowed.

We waited until he was inside before getting back into the car. I pulled back out onto the road and heard Bella sigh next to me.

"Well, what now?"

"I'm taking you home," I said with a crooked grin. "And then I'm leaving again without you."

"What? No you're not!"

"Yes, I am. I have Valentine's Day plans to make for us."

She groaned.

"No amount of whining or arguing with me is going to stop me. So you should just surrender to me now," I replied teasingly.

She crossed her arms over her chest. "You are a serious pain in my ass."

"Maybe," I allowed. "However, I think we could use a weekend away from this disaster."

"We just went out of town."

"I know. But I want you all to myself for our first Valentine's Day together. No interruptions from the paparazzi, friends, or psychotic reporters."

I stopped at a light and leaned over so that I could kiss her. "Just you and me."

Her lips twitched. "You selfish bastard."

I laughed. "I am. Get used to it."


	35. Chapter 35

**Hey, there. Remember me? Yeah, I know... it's been almost 3 weeks since the last update. Totally unlike me, but when reality keeps shoving shit at you, you can't really help it.**

**OK, review replies will commence again this chapter, because the James issue is now officially wrapped. Also, there's some smut. Have fun with it :)**

**As always, thank you everyone for the reviews you take the time out to give, and the continual talk that has people still putting this on their alerts list. I really appreciate all of it more than I can say.**

**Thanks to Stratan for simply being the man. Yeah, I think that about covers it.**

**A/N at the bottom.**

* * *

Chapter 35

**Bella**

Jane shoved her chair back away from the table and pushed at her hair under the black hood on her head. "I typed out two pages of notes. I'm done."

I laughed dryly. "Like hell you are. Did you even bother citing your sources?"

"What?" She rolled her eyes. "Do I have to?"

I stared at her, trying to decide if she was really that stupid or just didn't care. I was going for the latter; she seemed extremely quick-witted. "Um, yes."

She pushed her laptop my way. "Then you do it."

"I don't fucking think so. I've done enough work for you. You can do this on your own."

She looked like she was going to pout but startled me by letting out a little screech of anger instead. "This is what Mike got me a tutor for. _You _do it."

"Mike got you a tutor because he wants you to learn the material so that you don't fail your first year of college. You and your brother both get on my nerves—and I wouldn't have agreed to do this if it wasn't for Emmett—so don't push me, Jane. I'm not benefiting from this little arrangement in any way, and I have enough bullshit in my life to worry about without you adding to it. So you can either do it like this, or I walk. I really don't care either way."

She narrowed her eyes at me for a few seconds before finally relenting. "Fine."

God, I wanted to tell her to shove her laptop up her ass and leave her to figure it all out on her own, but I could _not_ force myself to do it.

_Damn it._

"Fine."

We sat in stony silence while she started keying in all the information she needed. She went through the stack of books at her side slowly, and to speed up the process, I finally pushed the other three books over toward her so that she wouldn't have to stop and ask for them. It'd be like pulling teeth to get her to finish if she got distracted.

My bracelet dragged noisily over the table, catching her attention immediately. She snatched my hand up and scrutinized it, turning it around to see the clasp.

I nearly gulped.

"Pretty," she said emotionlessly. "Did your fiancé get it for you?"

"Yeah. In Paris." I jerked my hand back. "Finish so we can go, please."

"What's on the clasp?"

"Nothing. That's how it's made."

She tilted her head as she studied me. "Hmm. Where did he get it?"

I put my hand in between my legs under the table to hide the ring from her. "I don't know. I don't pay attention to stuff like that."

"How can you not? He can afford to buy you whatever you want!"

"I'm not with him for the money," I snapped back.

She smirked. "Sure you're not."

"I'm not," I repeated between my teeth.

She rolled her eyes—again—and picked up her vibrating phone. "Whatever. I have to go now. I'll see you next week."

She stood up and grabbed her belongings, not bothering to shut off her laptop before slipping it into her bag, and left me to pick up everything else.

As soon as she was out of sight, I groaned and let my head hit the table with a thud.

"Bad time?" a deep voice asked from beside me.

_Not now. Just no. Not now_, I pleaded to whoever would listen to me.

"What do you want?" I asked, never moving from my position.

"DNA results came in," James said, crinkling the envelope in his hands so I could hear it.

"Charlie and I both got the same thing sent to us." And now I was itching to race home and open it.

"Probably. But I thought maybe you'd check it out with me?" He sounded so hopeful.

"You know Edward thinks you're doing this to get to me," I stated evenly.

He laughed grimly. "Sure he does. I've done it before."

"Why does that not surprise me?" I sighed.

"Look, I'm not proud of the way I've behaved. I have a lot of… issues with my adoptive family, and to find out that you were potentially related to me after feeling attracted to you and being jealous of Edward for having you, well, I was disgusted with myself." He paused. "I apologized. It's all I can do."

"You can stop following me."

"I will. I know I'm not supposed to be around you, and I get why. I'm sure I seem like a psycho to you-"

I cut him off with a barking laugh and finally looked up at him. "You're joking, right? You _seem_ like a psycho? Tell me; if you had some random journalist follow you around all the time, saying cryptic things in inappropriate places, wouldn't you be a little freaked out?"

He looked away uncomfortably. _I'll take that as a 'yes'._ "Can I sit down?"

"Only if you promise to leave me alone after you finally have proof that my father is not your father." My brow furrowed. "If that makes any sense."

He gave me a small smile. "It does. And I promise you won't see me again unless I'm legitimately working. I thought maybe this would take precedence over a restraining order. At least for a few minutes."

I pursed my lips as I thought about it.

He held out his cell phone. "Call the police, if you want."

What I really wanted was to get this over with. I'd given Edward's theory careful consideration and had even decided that if James didn't show up at the clinic to give his sample that I'd agree whole-heartedly with it. But something in me was glad that he seemed genuine enough to take the test when he got back to LA. I'd never been wrong about a person before, and while I knew there was always a first for everything, my instincts were always right. If I wasn't right about James, it meant that I was incredibly gullible and naïve.

And that was something I wouldn't have been able to stand.

I watched him closely as he waited for me to make my decision. He simply… wasn't scary to me. Creepy, yes. But not scary. Not anymore. I couldn't explain what changed, and I wasn't going to try. I was just happy that his anger had finally seemed to fade the day of the Golden Globes. And I realized I got a glimpse inside someone whose childhood was just as unhappy as mine was. I knew that I'd feel the same way if I were him. I'd feel every bit of that built-up resentment that he had toward me if he had the father—the life—that I thought I should have had too.

If only he knew how incredibly fucked-up my life had been. It wasn't the picturesque childhood with Charlie that I knew James had envisioned. I lived here, in LA, with Renée and rarely got to see Charlie. Not because of any custody arrangement disallowing him visits with me or because he didn't want me, but because I was afraid to leave my mother alone for more than a few days at a time.

There was no telling what I'd come home to.

"Open the letter," I finally replied, pushing his phone away.

He let out his breath shakily. "If he's not… If what he says is true… I can't even begin to tell you how fucking sorry I am."

I ran my hands over my face. "James, you can say you're sorry every day until the day you die, but that doesn't mean I'll ever forgive you. You should have been honest with me from the beginning instead of scaring me half to death."

He stared at his hands sadly. "Yeah. I just wanted to be sure first. I thought it would scare you more if I randomly walked over to you and said, 'Hey, I think you're my sister'."

I had to laugh a little with the truth of that statement.

"And I knew I shouldn't have followed you around," he continued. "But I couldn't help myself. I just wanted to know something about you. Edward wouldn't have let you come anywhere near me. It would have been too risky. I might have written a story about your relationship."

"But you knew all along."

"Yeah. I knew that you two weren't as you seemed, and Bella, I wanted that story. It's what made me start looking into you. But after I found out about you being Charlie Swan's daughter, it wasn't important to me anymore. So I kept it to myself."

I cleared my throat and tried to keep my composure. He'd known at the Black and White Ball about my relationship with Edward, but he couldn't have known that I was potentially related to him. The way he looked at me then and the way he looked at me now were two totally different things. He'd hated me because he thought that I was after Edward for the same reason that everyone else did at first—money. Then, in Barney's, he assumed that not only was I a gold-digging whore, but I was blessed with everything he'd been denied. It was no wonder he got so pissed off when I'd called him a perv.

But there was still one thing I was confused about…

"Was it you who gave Tanya those photos?"

He shook his head. "I honestly don't know where she got them."

"Were you there that night? The night Edward stayed at my apartment for the first time?"

"For a couple hours. It was pretty clear he wasn't coming home any time soon, so after a while, I called it a night."

"We, uh, we had a few things to discuss. He was pretty excited about something that night."

"Obviously. He didn't check his surroundings once that night. I think it was the first time I'd seen him lose focus and let us actually see into his real life." He shrugged. "We all screw up at some point."

"I guess so."

"I never expected Edward to get a PI. Or for him to hire a bodyguard for you."

I was stunned. "Did you think he was just going to let your creepy ass follow me around without trying to find out why? You're lucking that a restraining order, private investigator, and a bodyguard are the only things he did!" I told him vehemently. "He is fiercely protective of me. He could have ruined you. He still has that option."

James nodded. "You two are good together. You can see how much he loves you." He took a deep breath. "Okay, let's just get this over with."

"Let's."

He ripped open the envelope and read the results quickly, tensing up as he processed the results.

"Fuck," he whispered. "Your father was right."

I yanked the page out of his hand and hurried through the results. The markers indicated that I was Charlie Swan's child, but James Eliot was not.

Thank you fucking Jesus.

"Well, maybe you should search for your biological mother. She might know who your real father is," I whispered gently as I handed the paper back to him.

"I can't. She died three years ago."

"Oh," I said in surprise. "I'm sorry."

He shrugged and balled the paper up in his hand.

"Um, I actually have something that I think I should give you," I said awkwardly.

I pulled out the manila envelope that contained all of James' records from my messenger bag. Edward had insisted that I put it in his safe, but I couldn't seem to let it out of my sight and had opted to keep it on me at all times. I guarded it with my life. Now, I was glad I had.

"This is the file Sam made on you. It's got a lot of information about your mom from when she was in high school. Maybe it'll help?" I asked, biting my lip uncertainly.

He took it from me and nodded. "Thanks."

He looked so dejected that I instinctively put my hand on his shoulder. "Want to help me cite all these sources by hand before you go?" I asked in an attempt to lighten things up.

"What?" he asked, giving me a strange look.

"Um, the girl I tutor got a text in the middle of our study session and just left. She threw all her stuff in her bag without bothering to shut down her laptop, so there's no telling if all her citations got saved."

"What an idiot."

"I know."

He reached out and grabbed the books, glancing over at me in confusion. "You sure you want me around?"

I smiled. "Well, I figure I'm not going to see you again unless it's in a professional capacity, so why not? Besides, you owe me."

He shook his head and chuckled. "So I do. Got a pen and a piece of paper?"

"Look around, buddy. You're in the campus library. What do you think?"

We each took a stack of books and started scribbling out notes without a word until I noticed a large figure looming over me. I could feel Emmett's watchful gaze on me, cloaking me with his anger. I tried to push past it, continue jotting down my notes while I ignored him, but it was no use. I couldn't concentrate.

_Ah, shit._

I finally just put down my pen and waited for him to lay into me—nonchalantly, of course.

"I fucking leave to get you your stupid mocha and that creeper shows up?" Emmett shouted as I took my coffee from his huge hand, glaring over at James.

My eyes darted around as I struggled to quiet him. "Relax, Em. He's not a big deal," I whispered loudly.

Emmett snarled. "Not a big deal? Are you kidding me with this, Bella?"

James held out the balled up piece of paper. "I just came to see if she wanted to check out the test results with me. She then asked me to stick around."

Emmett snatched the paper out of his hand. "Let me see that."

He frowned as he smoothed the paper out and started to read the results. He blinked a few times and then grinned widely.

"You were right."

"Yeah."

"So, Eliot. Get out of here. You have no excuse to bother her anymore."

"I was just getting ready to go. I'm finished." He stood up and handed me his notes. "See you around, Bella."

God, I hoped not. "See ya."

I waited until James was through the doors and out of sight before chancing a look up at Emmett. "Well, let me hear it."

He plopped down in the chair that James had been sitting in and sloshed his coffee out everywhere. "Shit," he hissed, wiping at his shirt. "I'm glad that fuckstain isn't your brother. That would make me seriously question your sanity, BDB."

I giggled until his worried expression caught my eye.

"Why were you being so nice to him?" he asked seriously. "He doesn't deserve it."

"No. But I can't say how I'd act in his place. He said he has issues with his adoptive family and that he was disgusted with himself for thinking that I was hot. I mean, he was convinced that I was his sister. That's got to be a bit of a mindfuck, right?"

He conceded with a nod.

"So I don't know. I just didn't see the point." I could feel my cheeks burn with embarrassment.

"Are you done?" He pointed to the books in front of us.

"Yep. I could shoot you for telling Newton that I was good at this. She is such a pain in my ass…"

He chuckled. "Sorry. Won't happen again."

"It'd better not."

He grabbed the stack of books on the table and rushed them over to the cart sitting in the corner. "By the way, I'm not telling Edward that he was here when I wasn't. He'll kick my ass."

"I'm not keeping it from him. He'll kick _my _ass," I countered.

He groaned. "Come on. I don't want to get fired."

"You're not getting fired." I shoved him toward the door. "Stop being such a baby."

"Yeah, right."

"You're not! Now take me home. I still have to pack for… I have no fucking clue where."

He threw his arm around me, causing me to stumble over my feet. "Get over it already, would you? The man wants to spoil his wife," he said into my ear.

"But I don't know what to pack."

"It doesn't matter. He already did it for you."

* * *

**Edward**

The sound of the garage door opening stopped my furious pacing in the kitchen. I rushed toward the door and threw it open just as Bella's blue Audi rolled into its designated spot. Without thought about what I was doing, I strode over to the car so that I could feel Bella's warmth against me. It was an overreaction, but I couldn't seem to make myself care. From the moment my mobile had rung, I'd been on edge. I'd practically sprinted down to the mailbox to retrieve today's mail and ripped the envelope holding the test results inside so that I could see what she'd told me for myself: that James was not Bella's brother after all. I was ridiculously happy that she wasn't related to him. But the elation that shot through me wasn't enough to quell my anger with her for inviting him to actually _stay _with her while she finished up at the library.

She could be so incredibly foolish sometimes.

As soon as she glanced up at me through her window, I had to stifle the urge to chain her to the bed so that I'd never have to worry about her well-being again. A flurry of lascivious thoughts crossed my mind as I imagined her immobile and helpless to my will, writhing in frustration and want as I touched her, and a soft groan fell from my lips.

_Get it together_, I thought as I raked a hand through my hair.

I knew I was going to have to let some of this anxiety I had about her safety go, but it wouldn't be today. Right now, all I wanted to do was thank my lucky stars that James hadn't tried anything untoward with Bella; that it had been in a public setting, and Emmett was right there with her—guarding her—even if he hadn't been the entire time.

Now that she was here, in arm's reach again, my relief was thick.

Palpable.

As soon as she was standing next to me, I shoved the door closed and slammed her into the car. I wrenched her face to mine and poured all my aggravation and concern into our kiss as I pressed every inch of my body against hers. Her moan was drowned out by the sound of Emmett parking his Jeep directly behind her, but its vibrations reverberated through me; it had me aching to strip her down and pound out the desperation gripping me.

After everything that James had done—after all the times he'd frightened her or stalked her obsessively—she still gave him mercy he didn't deserve. It was unfathomable to me how she could be so paradoxical. She was cynical, bitchy, snarky, and ruthless; insecure, accepting, forgiving, and compassionate.

And every day I loved her more for it.

I tore my mouth away from hers and watched as her chest heaved and she swallowed thickly.

"Well, that was quite a welcome home." She licked her now swollen lips, and I nearly drove my tongue into her mouth again.

"Please. I'm begging you. For my sanity…" I gasped. "Don't make it a point to be nice to that bloke. Not after the way he acted about all of this."

She blinked a few times as her brow knit, genuinely confused by my reaction. "Edward, it was fine. Emmett was there. He didn't mean any harm. I-"

"Isabella," I groaned. Her eyes went wide with the name I so rarely used anymore. "Please."

I stared at her intensely, trying to convey how serious I was, pleading with her silently to agree so I didn't go mad with fear every time she walked out our door.

She reached up and put her hand on my jaw, trailing her thumb across my cheek. "Okay. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you worry."

I simply arched a brow in return. She knew me well enough to know that I worried about her constantly.

She giggled at me. "Yeah. That was a pretty stupid thing to say. So when do we leave?"

"I have everything you'll need in the back of the Range Rover, but you should check around the house to make sure I haven't forgotten anything or to see if there's anything you'd like to take that I didn't know about."

She nodded. "Be easy on Emmett," she whispered. "He thinks you're going to fire him."

"What for?" I demanded in surprise.

"For leaving me alone in the library."

"He got you a mocha and left you on university property. In public. Following my instructions is hardly grounds for getting fired."

She shrugged and stood on her toes to press a quick kiss to my lips. "So make sure he knows that."

I nodded and waited for her the door to close behind her before I glanced over at Emmett. The sheepish way he stared down at his feet as he kicked at the garage floor had a laugh bursting out of me before I could think better of it.

I quickly schooled myself when his head snapped up and saw the shocked expression on his face.

"Sorry. But really, Emmett, you shouldn't be so nervous. You did nothing wrong," I assured him.

"How can you tell me that? You got _pissed_, man."

"Of course I got upset. I don't like him having such easy access to my wife, regardless of what his motives were. It goes with being an actor, I suppose. I trust hardly anyone."

Emmett nodded. "Well, if it helps, he didn't do anything weird. He just sat there and helped Bella with the notes she was taking and left as soon as I said something."

"Good. He shouldn't come near her again unless we're doing some event he's been hired for. And soon we'll move. We'll no longer be in the… epicenter of the entertainment industry and can hopefully find a bit of a reprieve from all of this." I waved my hand flippantly.

"Did you hate it this much before? The fame, I mean?"

I shook my head. "No. I only started hating it recently when I saw how much it impacted my life and everyone around me. Bella, specifically. She's everything to me now. She _deserves_ everything."

Bella came back out into the garage with her iPad in her hands. "I thought that maybe I'd have time to read or something."

"You might... Or you might not," I replied suggestively with a quirk of my lips.

"And on that note, I'm leaving," Emmett said with a dramatic shudder.

"You shut up," Bella warned. "I have put up with way too many of your nasty sex sessions with Rosie for you to pretend to be disgusted by one comment."

"Have a good weekend," Emmett replied, flashing her a wide, impish grin as he climbed back into his Jeep.

Bella rolled her eyes. "Jesus."

We waited until Emmett was down the driveway before locking up the house. Once everything was secure, we got into the Range Rover and took Samson over to Angela's before heading to the airport. I somehow managed to compose myself as I focused on the road and the few SUV's of paparazzi tailing us, even though traffic was at a near standstill for the majority of the drive and Bella's leg was bouncing anxiously in my peripheral.

"Would you calm down?" I chuckled, placing my hand on her thigh to still her.

"Well, fuck, I don't know where we're going, and I'm pretty sure this traffic made us late," she responded as we neared the hangars.

"We're not late."

She whipped her head in my direction and stared at me, finally crossing her arms over her chest with a playful jibe when I chose not to say anything further.

"Oh, my God!" Bella giggled as we approached the jet I'd chartered for the trip. "Since when did you become a pretentious snob?"

"I'm not a snob," I objected lightly.

"Edward! A private jet? That's pretty damn snobbish."

"I wanted privacy for the entire weekend," I responded with a crooked grin. "I want no fans, no press—nothing but you and me while we're away. This was the easiest way to go about that."

She gazed over at me skeptically and finally nodded. "Okay. Lie to me then. I don't care."

I chuckled and reached to open the trunk of the car. "I'm not lying."

She yanked her bag out of my hand. "Whatever."

"_I'm_ going to carry that," I told her, snatching it back away from her with a smile.

"I'm not helpless."

"No. But I want to. Don't deny me, love." I playfully pouted at her.

She laughed and started walking toward the jet. "You're an idiot," she called over her shoulder.

I shrugged it off and followed her, greeting the pilot and the flight attendant as we ascended the last few stairs and walked inside. Bella took a turn to the right and stopped abruptly, causing me to nearly crash into her.

"Well, this is plushy. There's a couch. And a table and chairs." She paused to look back at me. "How far are we going?"

"Not far. Our flight time is just over two hours. I merely wanted to be sure that you're comfortable."

Bella rushed around the cabin, examining everything excitedly, and then flopped down on the couch.

She beamed up at me. "Oh, yeah. I'll be comfortable all right. Come be comfortable with me?"

I smiled back. "Let me just put our bags in the closet."

* * *

I lay in the hammock just off the beach and opened my eyes as I felt Bella breeze by me. I kept my eyes trained on her body, watching the strings of her black, barely-there bikini sway and skim over her back as she maneuvered her way through the sand and to the turquoise water. She looked incredibly gorgeous standing there half-naked with her hair piled up on top of her head and her skin glistening with sweat from being outside in the sun all afternoon. So beautiful, in fact, that I felt the physical affect she had on me immediately and had to readjust myself in my spot in the shade before she took note and used it to her advantage.

Although, honestly, I wasn't sure why I'd felt the need to hide it. Like Bella taking advantage of me could _ever_ be a bad thing.

So far, our trip here to Cabo San Lucas had been fantastic. We spent the afternoon enjoying the sun and spent both evenings in bed together, shutting off our mobiles and computers and simply taking the time to be with one another. It was nice to simply be here with her; to watch her face as she slept in my arms and listen to her talk to me about the most inconsequential things.

I fervently hoped that she would continue to be so blithe when we returned to LA. This was likely to be our last time truly alone together—without reality and responsibility constantly interfering—before I left to promote _Rogue_. I needed to be sure that she'd be all right without me; otherwise, I wouldn't be able to tear myself away from her.

It would be difficult enough for me as it was.

Bella stood at the shoreline, wiggling her toes, as she debated stepping into the water. It was quite warm here—a balmy eighty degrees—but regardless, it was still February. The water temperature was chilly, at best.

Unfortunately for Bella, a large wave crested and crashed into her, splashing cool water all over her legs. She danced back and shrieked, shivering once as she turned to face me.

"Holy fuck, that's cold!"

I laughed. "It's winter, love. What do you expect?"

She shrugged and walked back up to me. "I don't know. Everything here is perfect. Maybe the water should be, too."

I reached out and took her hand with mine, bringing it to my mouth so that I could nibble on her fingers. "I'm glad you're enjoying it."

"What's not to enjoy? We have this huge, private villa sitting on a private beach with a pool and a hot tub…" She looked around. "A hammock, a gym, and even a little tiki hut built over the grill by the pool. I think you outdid yourself, baby."

"I know it's quite large-"

"And expensive," she added.

I rolled my eyes. She still had no concept of how much money I actually had. "All right, and _expensive_, but I wanted to make sure we wouldn't be interrupted. This is the most secluded property in the vicinity. You could prance around naked and no one would ever know. In fact, you should do that now," I said wickedly.

She snorted a laugh. "Someone's horny."

"How in God's name do you expect me not to feel anything when you've been walking around all day in," I gestured wildly to her bikini, "_this_?"

Her eyes flashed as she smiled down at me. "You like it, huh?"

"I'd like it better off," I admitted.

"So take it off," she challenged.

I snaked my arm around her waist and pulled her down on me, thankful that I weighed so much more than she did so that the hammock didn't spill us out onto the ground beneath us. I slowly worked my hands up from her hips to the tie at the back of her neck and tugged on the string, eyeing her chest and waiting for the moment that her top fell away so that I could see her fully. I pulled in a sharp breath and smiled as soon as she was exposed to me, bringing my hands back around her body so that I could cup her breasts.

She lowered her body to mine and moaned as my fingers brushed over her nipples. As soon as she was within reach, I dragged my mouth over her shoulder and down to where my hands were still toying with her. Her natural taste was tinged with salt from the air, and her skin was pink and warmed from the sun. She rolled her hips on top of me, causing me to moan as she grazed her body over mine.

I dropped my hands to her hips and pushed her further down on me as I took her mouth with mine. She gasped once and then kissed me back aggressively, silently letting me know just how much she wanted me.

Our hands roamed each other's bodies as we lost ourselves in the demand we had to come together. I took her face in my hands and pushed her back just enough so that I could see her flushed face.

"Edward, take me inside," she breathed.

"No. I want to fuck you out here," I responded.

"But-"

"For once, we're completely alone. I want to take advantage of that in every way possible."

I trailed my fingers over the slick fabric in between her legs while I waited for her answer. She nodded, and I pushed her bottoms aside and plunged my fingers inside her as she fumbled with my swim trunks. She jerked them down only as far as necessary and hastily pushed my fingers away so that she could sink down on me.

"Oh, fuck," she cried out, rocking against me; her fingers latched onto the net beside my head. "We're going to fall."

"We're not going to fall," I grunted against the urge to come already. "I promise."

I kept my hands on her arse, squeezing the flesh underneath her bottoms as I kept her motions steady. Pieces of her hair fell out of her bun and swung over my face, and her sighs and moans of pleasure directed my movements, gradually speeding up the closer she was to climax.

I could feel her body tighten itself around me, and I thrust up into her as much as possible so that she'd come when I did—which was at any given second. I stared up at her face, watching her take her lip between her teeth and waiting for that tell-tale line to form between her brows so that I could finally let myself go.

"God, you're beautiful," I rasped as her face began to contort.

And that was all she needed. She buried her face in my neck and screamed out as she came with me. The woman could make me see stars sometimes, now being one of those times.

As soon as I could think properly again, I tightened my arms around her and held her against me as we both settled down together.

"We need to get you inside," I murmured, placing a kiss on her temple. "You're burnt."

"I am?" She sat up and poked at her chest, shrugging when she had sufficient proof of her sunburn. "Oh, well. It's too bad I don't tan, though."

"It most certainly is not," I objected. "Your skin was one of the first things that drew me to you."

She blinked and grinned down at me. "Really?"

"Really."

We eventually made ourselves move and went inside to shower and start dinner. I wouldn't let Bella help me, using Valentine's Day as my excuse to do something for her. I ogled her as she walked around the villa practically naked while she waited for the aloe I'd applied to her back and shoulders to dry, and I had to keep forcing myself back to the task at hand so that I didn't char the steaks.

We ate under the gazebo and watched the sun set over the ocean. I laughed at the annoyed look on her face when I started stacking up the dirty dishes so that I could wash them.

"Don't start. I'm spoiling you tonight."

"Edward," she protested.

I kissed her to shut her up and ran my index finger over the necklace I'd given her, happy that I had just one more night with her like this before we went back home.

"Happy Valentine's Day, baby."

She sighed, smartly choosing not to battle with me tonight. "Happy Valentine's Day."

I picked up the dishes and started toward the house, stopping when I heard her call out my name.

"You can bet that when we get back home, this kind of shit won't fly. I like helping you. It's just another way that I can spend time with you."

I chuckled and shook my head, realizing that she was right. "All right. I'll keep that in mind."

"Thank you."

I pressed my lips together and walked away before I could say anything further. There was no need for her to thank me; I clearly would do whatever she asked of me.

But there was no need to announce it to the world. After all, I needed to keep _some_ dignity.

* * *

**Short and sweet: This fic was originally outlined to be only 35 chapters long... which, obviously, we've already reached that point, and I'm still not done. At most, I think this fic will be 45 chapters long. Which means you all have a max of 10 chapters left before I finally call it quits and write an epilogue. And if you read the FGB outtake(s), you know that I've not even started diving into the main event. That'll happen VERY soon.**

**Don't forget to look me up on Twitter (at JennyB0719 - I am a pervy geek so I apologize in advance) or comment in the Twi'd thread. Links to everything can be found on my profile.**


	36. Chapter 36

**Hey, all! Just a quick little note up at top, and then another (IMPORTANT - to me, anyway) A/N at the bottom. **

**So thanks for the reviews and adds... if I didn't respond to your review, my fingers were likely bleeding from replying to the response to the fact that there's only another few chapters left. You all are amazing :)**

**Thanks to Stratan for his lightening quickness... I say one little thing, and he gets this back to me in no time. So awesome.**

* * *

Chapter 36

**Bella**

"Which one is it?" I asked, dragging my suitcase down the crowded London sidewalk and looking around at the surrounding buildings.

It was cloudy outside, the threat of rain looming over our heads, but I didn't care. The city itself was incredibly different from anything else I'd seen, including Paris. Maybe it was because this was the place that had helped shape Edward into who he was, but after only an hour's time here, I'd already grown to love it. I could already imagine acquainting myself with the neighborhoods, landmarks and people. It was probably hasty of me, but I could already envision a life here with Edward, and that led me to an abrupt realization.

This was where I wanted to be. That excitement I'd felt on the plane when I spotted the Thames River made a little more sense to me now, as did all the little shots of adrenalin when I'd thought about attending school in England. I _knew_ that we could have an amazing life here, even though I hadn't stepped foot on Oxford's campus yet, just like I knew it when I filled out the application back in January. And from the moment I walked out of the airport with Edward, everything had seemed to click into place for me.

I just needed to convince my extremely rational husband that this decision of mine would never be regretted, no matter how rash he would think it was.

"This one," Edward replied, pointing to our left at the large, creamy stone building.

"It's really nice." Unsurprisingly.

He shrugged, appearing—for once—to be a little uncomfortable. "It's home."

I wanted to ask more, but with the feverish clicks of cameras and droning buzz of the paparazzo's voices, it was useless. Not only was it difficult to carry on a conversation in the midst of all the commotion, but there was no way I could find out about his family's whereabouts without alerting the press to their existence. It made me wonder how the hell Edward had managed to keep them a secret for so long. It seemed nearly impossible.

"Is this how it always is when you come back?"

He gave a terse nod. "For a few days it is."

The doorman stuttered a greeting, his face wearing the shocked expression that most people did when they spotted Edward, and let us inside the marble lobby where, thankfully, the only sounds made were that of our suitcases' wheels rolling across the floor. My ears rang with the sudden silence, and I grabbed at one of them with my free hand and wiggled, trying to make the annoying sound stop.

"You all right?" Edward chuckled.

"I'm fine," I pouted.

He laughed harder. "Sure you are."

"I am," I protested. "I'm just trying to get my ears to stop ringing."

"The zeal of the British paparazzi does take a bit of getting used to."

"I noticed." I also noticed that I didn't like it—_at all._

Edward bypassed the elevators and led me to a hallway with large white doors lining the left side. He stopped at the third and pulled the key out of his pocket, opening the door and holding it for me as I walked inside.

I glanced around quickly, wanting to drink in the sight of the apartment where Edward grew up as much as I could without looking like a gaping idiot while I took off the cream colored coat we'd bought in Paris. It was huge; the size of the kitchen and living room were the size of my old apartment back in LA, and it was painted a cheery yellow and trimmed in white. The oak floors had plush, Persian rugs scattered over them, and a fire had been set in the fireplace in the living room by someone on the housekeeping staff. White bookshelves, brimming with books, lined the far right wall in the living room, and a black lacquered table sat in a nook in the kitchen. The kitchen was stark white with stainless steel appliances and looked like it'd never been used.

I took a deep breath so that I could speak. From what I could see, the apartment held a homey, old charm to it, yet it was obvious that Edward had updated it in the years that had passed since his parents' deaths.

"It's beautiful. How much of it is the same from when you lived here?"

"Most." He swept his gaze over the room, and a resigned expression crossed his face. "The trim was repainted recently, and I had the master bedroom remodeled right after I moved to LA. The thought of coming back and sleeping in Mum and Dad's room was…"

"I completely understand," I told him, not wanting him to delve into anything he didn't want to.

He nodded and continued. "Nor could I sleep in my old bedroom. It took me a few years to feel comfortable staying here. I slept on the couch a lot at first."

I wasn't sure what to say other than "I'm sorry" and even that felt stupid so I just kept silent.

He cleared his throat. "The kitchen was also remodeled last summer, but everything else is exactly as my parents left it. With the exception of the flat screen. There used to be a mirror there instead."

I glanced to where he was pointing and giggled at how out of place it looked hanging over the formal fireplace. "Gotta have TV."

He grinned. "Of course. I need to know what trivial things are going on in the world out there just as much as the next bloke."

"So what's the plan? How do we meet up with your family?"

"They'll come here."

I blinked. "Really?"

"It's one of the perks of keeping the flat. The doorman has instructions to let them in, but the press can't possibly know which flat they're here to visit. Had Mum and Dad had a house, it wouldn't have worked out as easily for me all these years."

"Do you ever get to go to Carlisle and Esme's house?"

"Occasionally, but usually, they come to me. It's easier than trying to sneak me in their house. We were nearly caught a few years back, and I decided that it wasn't worth the risk. I've not been back since."

How sad.

"Care for a tour?"

"Um, yes."

He showed me around, pointing out all four bedrooms and the garden in the back, and then he showed me where the bathrooms were. I stared up at him as he opened the door to the bathroom in the hallway and said the words "the loo" and felt an odd sense of nostalgia pass through me. The scene, albeit in London instead of Malibu, was identical to the day of my interview, only there were no awkward pauses or incessant thoughts of wanting to fuck him senseless.

Well, that wasn't entirely true. I always had incessant thoughts of having sex with him, and I didn't think that would change any time soon—if ever, but there wasn't any of the guilt associated with it now.

He caught my shift and furrowed his brow. "Bella?"

"Sorry. I was just thinking about the day of my interview."

"Ah. The day that changed my life."

I rolled my eyes. "Edward."

"You can't deny it, so don't bother. I fell in love and got married. Those are two events that most people would consider life changing."

"Yeah, yeah."

He cupped the back of my neck and brought my lips to his, kissing me with a passion that had my head spinning in no time. My hands wound in his hair, and I moaned unabashedly into his mouth, making him grin and pull back.

"You've no idea how much I wanted you that day, baby. I thought I might go mad with it, with not being able to touch you."

"I think I have a pretty good idea. I distinctly remember wanting to shove you down to the ground and have my way with you," I said wickedly.

"How I wish you would've. You'd have saved me from weeks of trying to resist you. Obviously, my resistance was futile as here I am, utterly consumed by you."

I was at a loss for words again, but it didn't matter since Edward's mouth was back on mine. His hand moved into my shirt, holding me to him, while his other hand left a trail of fire across my skin. His leg slid in between mine, rubbing me just right. I moaned and pushed against him, only to abruptly stop as a strange buzzing sound went through the apartment.

"That would be Alice."

"Already?" I panted.

"Already." He gave me an amused smile. "Would you expect anything else?"

I walked with him toward the door, smoothing my black shirt over my jeans so that I didn't look like I'd just been nearly fucked against the wall. "No, I guess not."

He took my hand and brought it to his lips, kissing my palm as he opened the door.

"Hello, darlin'," he greeted Alice, letting his lips curve into a beautiful smile.

"Hello, brother," she replied pleasantly. She seemed so… _calm._

Until she spotted me next to Edward.

"Bella!" she shrieked, practically leaping forward and throwing her arms around me. "You look so good! I've missed you!"

"We talk on the phone all the time," I managed, grasping at her arms and attempting to pry her off of me.

It didn't work.

"I know, but it's not the same!"

"Alice?" Edward asked warily. "Are you all right?"

She finally released me so that she could look at him. "No. I've been so wrapped up in this wedding nonsense with Jasper that I didn't see anything regarding James until just last night. I am so sorry, Bella."

"Oh," I answered lamely, not really wanting to talk about it. "That's okay."

Edward chuckled. "But you know I don't want you interfering in our lives. Come to think of it, you've not meddled in months. It's been oddly quiet."

"I know, but if I can keep you from worrying over nothing-"

"You can't baby me, Alice," he interrupted with a lopsided smile. "That's my job as the elder sibling."

"Edward," she replied, whining slightly. "I'm being serious."

"And so am I. Unless it's life threatening, I would prefer not to know. What Bella decides is a completely different matter. You two will have to discuss it amongst yourselves," he said, glancing out into the hall. His brow furrowed as he looked back at Alice. "Where's Jasper?"

"Helping Mum. She fell last night and broke her arm."

"She what?" Edward shouted. "Why didn't anyone tell me?"

"For that reason right there," she laughed. "Mum's fine. She was outside trying to change the light bulb in the fixture next to the front door and missed a rung on the ladder. She tried to catch herself and the force of the fall on the concrete broke her…?"

"Ulna? Radius?" Edward supplied anxiously.

"Ulna!" Alice exclaimed. "Dad said she fractured her ulna."

"Jesus." Edward slipped past me and out into the hall, striding determinately toward the building's entrance.

"Edward!" I called after him. "Press!"

He stopped mid-step and spun around with a furious expression on his face. "Fuck!"

Alice jumped a little in shock.

He stomped right back into the apartment and out the door that led to the garden, slamming the door behind him with enough force to almost break the glass.

Alice peeked around me, letting her dark blue eyes widen as she took in the sight of Edward pacing angrily on the stone patio.

"What on earth?" she gasped.

"He's been like that a lot lately," I explained. "It seems he's ready for retirement."

"I'd say so." She inhaled deeply. "I'll go talk to him."

"Have fun." I smiled playfully.

"Oh, quiet. He'll see reason, won't he?"

"He always does."

"Yes, well, thank goodness for that."

She flitted off toward the back door, dropping her red coat on the couch as she passed it by, and left me to wait for Esme and Jasper at the door.

I stood there awkwardly holding the door while I waited for Esme and Jasper to appear. Esme rounded the corner with a huge, wicker basket of food in her good hand and held her pink plastered arm against her chest.

As soon as she was close enough, I practically leapt out into the hallway to take it from her. "Pink. How cute. You okay?"

"Bella," she said through her warm smile. "You don't have to do that. I'm fine. Really."

"Yes, yes, I do. Give me the basket. Now. Before Edward sees you with it."

She sighed. "Very well."

I took the basket from her just as Jasper leaned in to kiss my cheek. "You get prettier every day."

A blush spread across my cheeks, even though I slapped his arm for that bit of stupidity. "Stop it, damn it."

He grinned. "Aw, don't be that way, Bella."

"Then you don't be that way. Save your southern charm for someone who gives a shit. Like Alice."

He chuckled and started to say something that would no doubt have me doubled over in laughter, but I cut him off.

"Get inside before someone sees you with me."

He threw me a lazy salute and walked inside. "Yes, ma'am."

* * *

"Where are you taking me?" I giggled as I struggled to keep up with Edward's swift pace.

"You'll see…"

"Edward, baby, slow down. My legs aren't as long as yours."

He laughed. "I'd carry you, but we're being followed. I'm sure you wouldn't appreciate a photo of you thrown over my shoulder in the tabloids."

"Not really. I need to maintain _some_ dignity. Since I am with you and all."

He pretended to be offended. "I can't believe you just said that."

I shrugged. "Eh, you'll get over it."

He suddenly ducked through a door, yanking me inside with him. I froze as soon as I was inside and let my eyes adjust to the dimly lit pub. It wasn't bright outside at all; in fact, it had drizzled all morning long and judging by the cloud cover, it would start again at any second. But I still couldn't see a thing.

"A pub?" I asked, finally able to examine all the dark woodwork around us. "It's nice, but I thought you were going to take me to some other famous London monument."

He chuckled. "I am, love. I thought we could break for lunch first, though. I have a surprise for you."

My eyebrows shot up. "Oh?"

"Now why are you so surprised?" he asked with a grin.

"I really don't know," I replied with a giggle.

He scanned the room and stopped when his eyes landed on a specific table, letting his grin widen substantially.

"This way."

"Okay," I muttered slowly, staring over at the two men seated at the table we were heading toward.

The blonde man jumped up as soon as he saw Edward and laughed excitedly, slapping the other man on the shoulder and pointing in our direction.

Edward let go of my hand long enough to exchange a long, stiff hug—these were men, you know—before bringing me back to his side again.

"Bella, I'd like you to meet two of my oldest mates-"

The blonde snorted. "We're your only mates, Masen."

Edward laughed, happier than I'd seen him since our honeymoon. His eyes shone and his expression was undoubtedly relaxed.

I loved seeing him like this. It seemed like there was always some issue looming over our heads, personally and professionally, and I could see how ready he was to be rid of it all. Hell, so was I. The issues with James resolved themselves those few weeks ago with the DNA results, but now, there wasn't a day that went by that we weren't handling some ridiculous rumor with Zafrina or discussing the numerous press obligations coming up for _Rogue_.

I immediately halted that train of thought, not wanting to consider how empty the house would feel or how lonely I would be without him there with me. I only had another couple of weeks with him before he left for the first leg of his publicity tour. I didn't want to ruin it by stupidly moping around.

"You try having millions of fans and see how hard it is for you to be normal," he retorted.

"I could do it. Right, Peter?"

Peter just shrugged, unwilling to get involved in the conversation.

"The bloody hell you could," Edward laughed.

"So this is the wife," the blonde said, smiling over at me. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you. I'm Alistair."

I shook his hand, staring up at Edward with huge eyes. "You… uh, you too. I'm Bella."

"It's all right," Edward said soothingly. "They won't say a word."

"But you never mentioned any of this," I whispered. "Or the fact that you'd told someone other than our family that you got married."

Peter shoved his brown hair off his forehead uncomfortably. "I think we should let them discuss it alone," he muttered to Alistair.

"No, I'd like to see Edward talk his way out of it. You can go wait over there if you'd like."

Peter huffed in frustration.

"If we'd have had a normal wedding, these two would have stood up at the altar with me," Edward explained, blatantly ignoring Alistair. "And when I called Alistair and told him that I was visiting with you, it slipped out in my haste. I suppose I should have warned you, but I simply didn't think about it. We've been… busy."

His fingers gently curled around my arm, bringing me closer to him.

"Don't be angry, baby. I hadn't had a chance to speak with anyone from back home in a while. Besides, if I have the opportunity to tell someone that I'm happy with you, you know I'm going to."

The way he said "back home" tugged at my heart and reminded me all over again how alone he was in LA.

There was no way I could burst his little happy bubble, no matter how momentarily freaked out I'd been.

"I'm not angry. Just surprised. I thought for sure we'd have some major damage control in our future or something."

He bent down and kissed me lightly, letting his nose brush across mine before he pulled back. "Good to know you always have my best interest at heart, boss."

"Please," I said dryly. "Just keep in mind that your wife is also your agent and has a very strong _interest_ in your career and the insane amount of press you get just by saying 'boo'."

Alistair threw himself in his chair. "Tell me how you did that. I need to know how to have a girl in my pocket like that. Bending to my every whim."

Edward pulled out a chair for me and rolled his eyes. "Believe me, she does nothing of the sort."

"But-"

"You happened to be here for one of her more merciful moments. She's quite ruthless when she wants to be," he continued.

"Yep. Ruthless bitch, right here," I said, pointing at myself.

Alistair laughed. "Funny and pretty. Well done, Edward."

I felt like I should be the one accepting that compliment, so I interjected before Edward could say anything. "Thanks. I just love being made over like I'm not here," I said sweetly.

Alistair laughed again while Edward shook his head and draped his arm over the back of my chair.

"You'll do," Alistair said with a wink.

I nodded. "Good to know."

Edward ordered for me, insisting that I eat fish and chips during my first day exploring London, and helped me pick out a beer on tap that I'd actually like, which I only drank half a pint of. God knew I didn't need to be hammered around people I didn't know. That could be disastrous.

The waitress set the plate of food in front of me, and my lip curled with the funny-looking green goo on the side. I picked up the small, white cup and eyed it warily.

"What the fuck is this?"

For some reason, they all started laughing at my question. Like someone who'd only been to Forks—outside her home in LA—until recently should know what the English served with battered fish and fries. I arched my brow over at Edward and waited for him to sober up and give me an answer.

"Mushy peas. Here," he reached over and plucked the cup out of my hand, "I'll eat them."

"Please do."

After lunch, Alistair and Peter went sightseeing with us. I wanted to walk so that I could explore the city with Edward; he spent the afternoon talking to Alistair and Peter, virtually catching up on everything that he'd missed in the two years since he'd seen them last and let me poke around as I pleased. This was completely fine with me; I was too busy gawking over Buckingham Palace and giggling at the guards to care that he wasn't talking to me too.

Before I knew it, it was after four and would be getting dark soon. Alistair and Peter caught a taxi back to their cars at the pub, leaving Edward and me alone again.

"I had fun with them. They're great, Edward. How come you never talk about them?"

"It's hard to stay in contact with them. I don't know what's going on in their lives half the time," he explained. "So I really don't know what to talk about."

"I'm sorry."

"Why?" He flashed a crooked grin. "We're working to fix it."

"We are."

"Want to take the tube across the river to The Eye before it gets dark?" he asked, tucking me into his side as we walked down the sidewalk.

I glanced around, noting the photographers a few feet away. "Should we do that?"

He shrugged. "What's the worst that they can do, love? Ride the train with us?"

"Well…"

"It's faster than walking, and we are still obligated to have dinner with my family later. Or had you forgotten?"

In all my excitement, I _had _completely forgotten. "Oops?" I said sheepishly.

He chuckled. "I'm glad you're enjoying yourself."

Rain abruptly pounded at the pavement, causing me to squeal and hide underneath the awning of a nearby store. Edward hurried over to me, laughing loudly, and enveloped me in his arms. His hair was dark, dripping water down his forehead, and his eyes crinkled with his smile.

"Will it ever stop fucking raining?" I demanded.

"This is England. What did you expect? The weather is unpredictable, at best." His fingers found my wrist; his thumb rubbed over my wedding ring. "I tried to get you to bring an umbrella, but you refused."

"I thought this raincoat would be enough!" I cried.

"Obviously, it wasn't."

I laughed.

"It's nice, though," he said as he looked around, no doubt gazing at all the familiar sights.

"How is getting the flu on your trip to London nice?" I asked incredulously.

"I hope you don't become ill simply because you wanted to see where I'm from," he replied with a beaming smile. "I meant it's good to be home. With you."

"It feels right, doesn't it?" I asked shyly.

"It does," he agreed.

"So have we agreed that we belong in England?"

"Nice try. You need to visit Oxford first."

"And we're doing that while we're here, aren't we?" I asked hopefully.

His brows furrowed. "Yes…"

"Then it shouldn't be a problem."

He sighed. "You're absurdly stubborn."

"And you love me for it."

He chuckled and kissed the tip of my wet nose. "It's quite possibly one of my favorite things about you."

* * *

**Edward**

"Oh, God, my feet hurt," Bella complained as we walked through the door of my flat.

Actually, it was our flat now, a thought that brought a huge smile to my face. It was amazing how at ease I felt with Bella here. I'd always assumed that it would be difficult to bring someone into my parent's home, but I found—as with everything involving Bella—that I was pleasantly surprised. She belonged here with me; from the way her brown hair gleamed in the sporadic sunlight filtering through the windows, to the way she looked sitting down at the table with my entire family at dinner yesterday.

And God, I couldn't wait to get her back into bed. Seeing her lying beside me, in the house of my childhood, curled up under the white duvet with her lips parted slightly and her face void of any stress was… better than any words could describe. Like always, it caused a happiness I'd never known possible to well up inside me and take me off guard. Every day there was something to reinforce my decision to be with her, something to exponentially increase the love I had for her and cause that incredible feeling of rightness to virtually overwhelm me again. I began to think that I'd never become used to it.

"How about a soak in the tub?" I asked, kissing her lightly and locking the door behind us. "Three days of exploring London non-stop deserves a moment of relaxation, wouldn't you say?"

She hummed. "Okay." She started toward the hall and abruptly spun around, grinning mischievously.

I laughed at her sudden change of demeanor. "What?"

"We should buy one of those WC signs and stick it up on our bathroom at home," she snickered.

I raised my brows. "We should, eh?"

"Water closet." She giggled. "I don't know why, but it's just fucking hilarious to me."

"I think you're a bit slap happy with sleep." I paused, thinking that perhaps she was a little pissed from all that wine she had with Alice at dinner as well. "That's what you call it, yes?"

She giggled again. "Yep. And I think you might be right. Or maybe I'm just drunk. I don't. Fucking. Knoooow."

She stumbled over her feet and caught herself on the couch, and I immediately reached out for her, even though I was too far across the room to actually do any good.

I groaned and raked a hand through my hair. "Definitely pissed."

"You shut up," she snapped. "It's all your sister's fault. That wine was so _yummy_."

I quickly closed the distance between us. "So it would seem."

She waved me off with a sound of indignation.

I grinned down at her as I wrapped my arm around her waist. "But I think I'll hang on to you… just in case you decide to try and fall face first onto our floor again."

"Our," she sighed. "I like that."

"As do I. Very much so, in fact."

A wicked smirk flickered across her lips. "You're yummy too."

She slipped her hand inside my trousers and moved it downward until she found me. My body instantly reacted, hardening to her touch, and a shaky groan worked its way out of my throat.

"You like that?"

"Mmm," I answered daftly. There was no reasonable explanation for it, but when Bella wrapped her hand around me, I lost all cognizance.

The power she sometimes had over me was astounding.

"Edward?" she whispered shyly. "Touch me."

"Oh, fuck," I breathed, unable to think of anything else.

"Oh, fuck?" she repeated, leading my hand down to the juncture of her thighs. Heat radiated through her jeans, causing my control to snap.

"Yes," I snarled, yanking the emerald silk top over her head so that I could devour her.

I threw us down to the couch, landing in between her thighs and ground my hips into her, feeling her body jerk beneath me as I hit her most sensitive spot.

My mouth consumed hers, desperate to taste her sweetness on my tongue, and my hands roamed her smooth skin freely. She curled herself around me and wound her hands in my hair, urging me to continue. I broke away from the kiss just as both of us were beginning to gasp for air and moved my mouth down to her chest, shoving the black lace of her bra out of my way with one hand while I snaked the other around her body and opened its clasp.

I threw the bra on the floor and palmed her roughly, feeling the way her nipples pebbling with my touch affected me. I emitted a single, low moan as even more blood found its way into my trousers before bringing my lips to the perfection that was her chest again.

Her back arched up off the couch, pushing her body further into my ministrations. I ached for her, needing to bury myself inside her, so I hurriedly flicked the button to her jeans open and threw her zipper down so that I could have her completely naked under me.

With a raspy laugh, she kicked her jeans to the floor and fumbled with the buttons on my shirt. "Take off your pants," she commanded. "Please fucking hurry."

I complied, shamelessly shoving them down my hips just enough so that I was free and then let my fingers trail over the slick skin between her legs.

She threw her head back and groaned as I slipped a finger inside her, rolling her hips into my hand as she bit down on her lip. I stared down at her and watched as she fell apart at my hand, waiting for her orgasm to ebb before I hitched her leg over my hip and drove into her.

I grunted as I filled her, and her eyes flew open and found mine, unraveling me. I thrust harder into her, concentrating on anything but the urge to come. She felt so good around me, looked so beautiful underneath me, it was all I could do to keep some semblance of control and not suddenly react like a teenage virgin.

Her body tightened around me, and she grabbed my hips and directed my movements, bringing me even deeper into her. I dropped my head to hers and moaned disturbingly loudly as I came, pushing into her just enough so that she climaxed directly after me. My lips brushed over hers, and our breathing matched, sounding heavy in my ears.

"Oh, my fucking God. That was so good," she moaned breathlessly, causing me to burst out laughing.

"It was fast," I replied through a chuckle.

"It was intense," she protested.

I couldn't argue with that.

We laid there together for a few minutes longer before I finally disentangled myself from her and hobbled out of her way as I pulled my trousers back up, opting to leave them open since I'd simply take them off again to clean up anyway. She stood up and stretched, glancing at me over her shoulder and throwing me a lazy smile.

Seeing her rumpled and naked before me was entirely too arousing. I shifted on my feet as I traced her body with my eyes, feeling that all too familiar—and ridiculously soon—tightening in my stomach again.

She was absolutely gorgeous.

"Take that bath with me?"

"Oh, erm… hmm?" I asked, blinking my way back into the present.

"Take a bath with me?" she repeated.

I immediately perked up, causing her eyes to drift down to my pecker and widen at the sight. "I've no idea, so don't ask."

"Well, I'm going to! What the hell's gotten into you tonight?" she laughed.

"Is that a complaint?" I asked in disbelief.

"Um, no. Absolutely no complaining at all. Feel free to be as horny as you like, baby." She titled her head back and stared at the ceiling. "Shit, sometimes, I can't help but feel smug at how lucky I am."

I chuckled and walked to her, pushing her hair off her neck and bending down to kiss just below her ear. "The feeling's entirely mutual," I whispered.

She shivered once and pulled away. "Bath. Before I get so stiff that I can't move for weeks."

She ran her bath while I answered the e-mails that I'd ignored all day. By the time I was finished, she was lying back against the white porcelain tub with her eyes closed with a ridiculous amount of bubbles surrounding her. A washcloth was rolled up under her neck, and she hummed quietly to the song playing in her ears.

I cocked my head to the side and listened closely, noticing just how lovely her voice was.

She opened one eye, and a blush bloomed across her face as soon as she realized that I was watching her. "What are you doing?"

"Enjoying the view."

She smiled and shook her head. "Get in here."

She pulled her ear buds out of her ears as I undressed and moved so that I could slide in behind her. She leaned back against my chest and sighed contentedly, snuggling up against me.

"So Oxford tomorrow?" she asked as I took the washcloth she'd had rolled up behind her neck and dipped it in the water.

"Considering tomorrow's one of their 'open days', I'd say so," I answered, watching the rivulets of water fall over her shoulders and disappearing in the soapy water. Although, it really didn't matter. She had a private tour scheduled tomorrow. It just happened to fall on one of the days they had reserved for prospective students.

All those universities she'd applied to back in January had finally started sending her response letters. There hadn't been a single rejection letter yet, not that I thought there would be. Bella was without a doubt one of the most intelligent people I knew, but I think it surprised her that she had the wits and means to go wherever she pleased. It was actually quite amusing to watch her anxiously open a letter and then start bouncing up and down when she read the welcoming paragraph.

"I'm nervous."

"What? Why?"

She shrugged and pushed herself further into me; her arse brushed against me, causing me to groan.

She giggled and repeated the movement.

"Watch it," I warned thickly, grabbing her hips and stilling her body. "Payback's a bloody bitch."

She snorted. "Yeah, right."

I dipped my hand in between her legs, teasing her, before pulling my hand back and resting it on her stomach.

"You were saying?"

She whimpered and spun around to face me, rolling her eyes as she straddled me. "I was saying that I'm nervous."

"And why is that?"

"What if I don't mesh with Oxford? I love it here with you. I love this apartment, the neighborhood. I just don't want to be disappointed."

"There are still a few details to be worked out, love, even if you choose to go to Oxford. To live here and drive over an hour each way seems absurd. We'd likely have to purchase a house near the campus anyway."

"No. I don't want to do that. I want to live here with you," she replied obstinately.

"I love to hear you say that… but let's be realistic. The commute would be horrible, and you'd tire of it by the end of the first semester."

"Maybe," she admitted. "But it wouldn't last forever. Just… If I choose to go there, I want to do it my way. Please?"

I huffed, a little annoyed that I had to pointedly tell her this. "I'd do anything for you. You know that."

She bit her lip and glanced down. "Yeah?"

"Yes, you silly girl. If tomorrow you decide that Oxford is what you want, I'll gladly do whatever it takes to make it happen for you. _How_ you want it."

"Thank you," she breathed. "I love you."

I smiled with the sentiment. "And I love you."

* * *

Bella and I woke and quickly showered—separately to avoid any temptation—and braved the expected crowd of photographers waiting for us outside the building. Judging by the yawns Bella tried to hide and the slight shadows under her eyes, I guessed that she was suffering from jet-lag and led her to the nearest café for some much needed caffeine and breakfast before we started our trip.

Bella sat down at a table in the center of the room and laid her head down, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath while she waited for me to bring her order to her.

I dealt with the star-struck barista as graciously as I could, but even I had to admit that I was a little grumpy with exhaustion. My normal smile was replaced with a grunt when she mentioned that she couldn't wait to see _Rogue_. Her enthusiasm was a little difficult to handle at the moment. This, of course, made me feel guilty, so I left her a large tip and the autograph she'd requested to compensate for my rudeness.

I placed the latte in front of Bella and was welcomed with a sleepy grin. "Thanks."

I pushed her scone toward her and nodded to it. "Eat. I've no idea when we'll get a break for lunch. It may not be until afternoon tea."

"No more tea," she groaned. "I can't handle any more tea. Your mom's ruined it for me."

I chuckled. "But I see you aren't tired of the pastries served with it."

She broke off a piece of her scone and grinned as she examined it. "Nope. You got me chocolate chip. Even more caffeine."

"I thought it would be helpful."

"Definitely."

We rushed through breakfast and headed back to where I'd parked the car a few days ago. It was a rental; I usually hired a driver for my stay in London, and I was giving serious consideration to purchasing something with Bella for our time here. It was expected that one of us would need a car at some point.

And this car was awful.

"Can I drive?" Bella asked excitedly.

"Absolutely not."

She pouted. "Edward! I'm a good driver."

"On the right side of the road. On the left… I'm honestly not so sure about that," I teased.

She rolled her eyes. "Come on. Don't make me beg."

"I wouldn't dream of it." I opened the passenger's side door for her and grinned. "Get in."

She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at me.

"You can drive on the motorway where there's not the risk of you hitting anything stationary."

"I don't like you."

"Really, Bella, with the risks factored in, you have to admit that waiting until we're out of the city is a good idea."

She furrowed her brow thoughtfully. "Risks?"

"Paparazzi, driving on the opposite side of the road, being in a strange and busy city," I listed off.

"Fine. As soon as we get out of Oxford, you'd better stop and let me drive back to London."

"Of course."

She grumbled something incoherent as I shut the door, causing me to laugh.

Bella stayed awake until we drove out of London, making sure that she missed nothing, and then curled up in the seat and rested her head on the console. I turned down the radio so that it didn't disturb her and just watched the scenery go by.

My life had been so busy for over a decade. It wasn't until now—when I was doing something dreadfully normal with my wife—that I realized how much I'd missed England. I knew I'd be content in whatever city Bella decided to study in, but now that it looked almost certain that this was where we'd end up in a few months, I was finding that I was… excited about moving.

And I was suddenly hoping that Bella loved Oxford as much as she loved London.

I parked at the one of the various curbs around campus and gently shook Bella's shoulder to wake her.

She groggily looked out the window. "We're here?"

"We're here," I confirmed.

"Oh, we're here!" she exclaimed, practically launching herself out of the car and racing around to the other side of the car where she immediately started looking everything over.

I sat there for a moment, a bit stunned with her sudden burst of energy, before I caught her waving at me out of the corner of my eye. I got out of the car and hurried over.

"You spaced. What happened?"

"I was a bit surprised that you woke up so quickly," I replied honestly.

"Oh." She giggled. "Sorry. I'm just… I don't know. Nervous like I said last night… but excited too."

Excited seemed to be the word du jour.

"So where are we going?"

I shrugged. "You tell me. It's your meeting, love."

"Well, I don't know. I mean, you're the native here."

I laughed. "Yes, but I went to Cambridge. Cambridge and Oxford are rivals. I never got into all of that, but I still had a little self-preservation. So the only time I ever came here was for a rugby match or a crew race."

"Oh. Okay, we're supposed to go to the university offices." She stared up at the massive gothic building next to us and frowned. "Where the hell are the university offices?"

"I think we should ask someone if you didn't get directions."

"I forgot," she said with a blush. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. It's not a problem."

Bella searched someone out while I stayed back, fairly certain that if an English university student caught sight of me that we wouldn't make it in time for our appointment.

She got directions to Wellington Square, and we both rushed in the direction she'd been pointed it, making it to the building and inside with just seconds to spare.

"I'm so glad I'm not late," she murmured. "That would have been a horrible first impression."

"You've already been accepted. I'm sure this woman would understand if you got lost."

"Probably."

Bella gave the woman at the front desk her name and was instructed to wait while she announced our arrival, and within just a few minutes, we were greeted by a tall, older woman who—as expected—fawned over me for a while before handing Bella all the information she could possibly need about the university and finally getting on with the tour.

It was inescapable.

We wandered around campus, vaguely listening to the woman's ramblings. Bella was paying more attention to the buildings, almost memorizing every detail about each stone structure. I, on the other hand, was too busy reading through the enormous stack of paperwork to care about the history. I could look that up online later if I wanted to.

"Holy shit," Bella breathed, glancing around at the students streaming through Radcliffe Square in black gowns. "I forgot about the dress code."

"It's not every day, is it?"

"No. Thank God."

"So it's not a deal breaker," I asked for verification.

"No. Edward, I want it," she breathed.

"You're sure? You wouldn't want to tour any other universities that sent you acceptance letters?"

She shook her head. "No need. This is it, baby."

"All right. So who's going to inform Charlie that you're actually moving to England?"

She pulled in a sharp breath. "You?"

I groaned. "Oh, yes. I can't wait for this conversation."

"He already knows it's a possibility. And he was okay about it-"

"He was 'okay' about it because I made sure he knew that the decision hadn't been made, and you were still weighing your options."

She chewed on her lip as she debated something. "Um… well… then I guess I'll do it. But I really don't want to."

"I think it would be easier if it came from you," I said genuinely. "But if you want me to do it…"

"No. I'll do it." She did a little hop as she turned to face me fully. "You know what I can't wait for?"

"What's that?" I asked with a crooked grin.

"Your family's reaction."

I laughed and took her hand. "Now _that's_ something to look forward to."

* * *

**2 Announcements:**

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	37. Chapter 37

**Hey, all. Just a quick note, and then I'm done. Promise.**

**Thanks to everyone who reads and reviews and spreads the word. I love you guys. Thanks to Stratan for being such a fantastic beta. If you voted for me in the Twilight All-Human Awards, I won nothing - with little surprise, I'm not as popular as some of the other authors - but a huge congratulations should go out to all that did! There were some amazing fics nominated!**

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***Takes a deep breath* Ok. I'm starting to set it all up, folks. You've been warned.**

* * *

Chapter 37

**Bella**

I sighed contentedly in the plush, rust-colored chaise lounge that sat on the portico of the back of the Cullen/Masen (I wasn't entirely sure which) Kent estate. It was absolutely no wonder Edward loved it here so much. It was so peaceful and insanely gorgeous already; I couldn't imagine what this garden of Esme's would look like in full bloom. There was nothing but birds chirping in the trees and the sound of rushing water from the stream that passed through the property. Everything else was silent.

A giggle escaped my throat with how sappy I was being. I was going to have to get back to reality, quick, before I lost my mind, deemed myself Elizabeth Darcy, and made Edward hop on a white horse and ride through the fields in a pair of breeches.

_Oh. That's kind of hot._

A rustling coming from behind me had me whirling around in my seat. Esme was coming through the doorway, awkwardly trying to hold a small box under one arm while shutting the door with her injured arm.

She saw me watching her and grinned. "Hello, darling. I thought I might find you out here."

"Give me that before Edward sees you and kicks both of our asses," I hissed, holding my arms out for the box.

She rolled her eyes. Somehow, the action still looked elegant on her. "He's being extremely overbearing. I'm fine. Really. Just a bit of clumsiness is all."

"Still." I wiggled my fingers. "Give."

She relinquished the box and sat down beside me. "Where is our boy, anyway?"

"Working out and then taking a shower."

She shook her head. "It's all he ever does. Tell me, when he's finally retired from all this acting business, will he give himself a break?"

"Probably not. He says he has me to keep up with now."

She laughed. "That's quite true. And babies in the future, I assume."

I nodded. "That's the plan."

"That's why I'm here, actually," she replied, pointing to the box. "That box is full of things from when Edward was a baby. I wasn't sure when we'd all be here together again, so I thought I'd just give it to you now to take back to London with you before you fly back to LA. That's where you'll be moving, yes?"

My eyes bugged out, and my mouth fell open comically. I was having the baby talk with my mother-in-law already? "I… uh, yeah. What kind of baby stuff?"

"I'm not pressuring you," she laughed, knowing exactly what my discomfort was about. "Honestly. And I doubt you'll want to use any of it; it's all so old and outdated. I thought I'd give it to you simply for sentimental reasons."

"Okay."

"Open it," she encouraged.

I did as I was told and opened it, glancing at the contents warily. What I found was surprising. There weren't any ridiculous baby clothes like I'd thought, but some amazing handmade toys, a christening gown, photos, and a gorgeous, celery green knitted blanket.

"Edward's Catholic?" I blurted out.

She giggled. "Not a practicing one. Lizzie was, therefore, so is Edward."

"Oh."

I moved a few things to the side and pulled the blanket out, running my thumb over the soft yarn.

"Lizzie made that. I thought you could have Alice add pink around the edges if you two have a girl. Or you could just keep it in storage and make your own memories when the time comes." She waved her arm. "It's no matter. So long as the two of you are up in the clouds like new parents should be."

And now I was crying. "No, it's perfect," I sniffled. "Does Edward know about all this?"

She shook her head. "I found it in the London flat about a year after Ed and Lizzie died. Edward was so… depressed and lost; I took it home with me and kept it a secret." She gazed at me seriously. "You know, it took him two years to call me 'Mum'. I was always 'Auntie Esme'. But the day my sister died, I became his mum. He was suddenly my focus. I felt no different for him than I did Alice, whom I'd had since she was a toddler." She paused. "I never expected him to feel the same. Lizzie was such a good mum. So the first time he said it… Well, I was quite literally speechless. And then I burst into tears and embarrassed the poor bloke to death."

I laughed with her and wiped at my eyes. "Thank you," I told her sincerely. "My mom's never given me anything like this. She probably trashed it all as soon as she could."

Esme's mouth tightened in an unhappy line. "Edward's told me about your mum. Not much, mind you, but enough that I've gathered an opinion of her. And it's not a good one, dear. She's a fool for not being there for you and realizing just how incredible you are."

A blush rose to my cheeks with her compliment. "She's trying. Finally. It's just hard to believe her. I've forgiven her so many times, but I can't really forget all of the things I missed out on because I was taking care of her. And really, that's not my biggest issue with Renée. It's the fact that I'm happy—so Goddamned happy—and she almost ruined it with her judgmental words and stupid beliefs." I shook my head and stared down at the blanket in my hands. "Well, they're not stupid. They're hers. I just wanted her to congratulate me or something. I guess that makes _me _stupid."

"Perhaps you should give her a chance," she replied, staring out into the backyard. "Or not. If you feel too slighted or can't get past the past, don't. That sounded a bit odd, didn't it?"

I smiled. "A little."

"Well, you know what I mean."

"I do."

Edward came through the door, his hair still damp from his shower, and smiled widely as soon as he saw the two of us sitting together.

"And what have we here?" he asked as he walked over to us.

"Just a little mother-daughter talk. None of your business," Esme replied, standing up. "I'll leave you to it."

Edward gently took a hold of Esme's hand to stop her. "Is your arm feeling all right?"

She pulled it out of his grasp to pat his cheek and started back inside. "I'm fine, dear. Stop being such a pest."

He chuckled and waited until she was gone before turning back to me. "What's all this?"

"Some things of yours Esme had. Baby stuff that your mom kept, actually."

An indecipherable emotion crossed his face. "I thought I had everything," he replied as he sat down.

"I guess not. She said this was somewhere in the apartment."

He rummaged through the box, pulling out the christening gown with a frown and examining it before setting it aside.

He pulled out a small, tattered bear and flushed slightly. Oh, how I wanted to hear the story behind that stain of embarrassment in his cheeks. But I knew now was not the time to joke with him about it.

"Blimey," he said, throwing the bear back into the box. "She didn't demand you give her grandbabies yet, did she?"

"No," I laughed. "She just wanted to give it to me while we were all here together."

He dragged a hand through his hair, sending it everywhere. "Good. Saves me from having to break my mother's other arm."

I laughed loudly.

"Not that I disagree," he continued. "I'd just like for you to be ready when it happens. It's still your call."

I gazed down at the blanket and pulled my lip in between my teeth, running over Esme's words. Maybe I should give my mom another chance…

"What?" he asked anxiously. "I know that look, baby, and I don't like it."

"I'm sorry," I said, sighing. "I was just thinking about Renée."

His brows knit, and his eyes shifted to where my eyes still were—the blanket. "Ah. What about her, exactly?"

I shrugged. "Just… everything," I admitted. "Esme comes out here with this box of all this stuff of yours, showing me what it's really like to have a family. And I love her for it. Really. But it's just not the same as having _my mom_ do it. And she never will."

He wrapped an arm around me and hugged me against him. "You can try to have that relationship with her, you know. There's no guarantee that it'll work out, but you can always try. I think she'd like that," he said slowly.

My head popped up. "What?"

"She calls every now and then to see how you are." He watched my reaction warily. "I always tell her the same: that you're brilliant. You are, aren't you?"

"Yeah, but… wait. You… you talk to her?" I asked in confusion. "How did she get your cell number?"

He leaned away from me and reached up to run a hand through his hair, dropping it to his side instead at the last second. "I gave it to her."

My heart leapt into my throat. "Why?" I shouted, taking him aback. "She doesn't know how to keep her mouth shut. She could have given half of California your number by now!"

He chuckled. "She's not. She's had it for over a month, love, and uses it once a week to talk about you."

"I don't understand."

"I might have told her on the night we got home from France that I'd keep her informed if she wanted. It was my way of keeping her from just popping up like that again. I didn't appreciate how upset you were, so of course, I wanted to prevent it."

"But you didn't tell me," I said pointedly.

"No. I wasn't sure how you'd feel about it." He paused. "Listen, I told her I wouldn't force you into anything, but that I thought you deserved a family. She worries about you and is making a notable effort. You merely need to decide if it's enough to erase all the bad memories and start over."

I groaned and fell over into his lap. I kissed his thigh and stared up at him. "I hate how you're such a good fucking husband sometimes. It makes it impossible for me to be bitchy with you. But you did hide something from me. Which is not okay."

He grinned. "I know. I'm sorry."

"That doesn't look like you're sorry."

"Your mouth is in very close proximity to my pecker. It's expected."

I giggled and shook my head. "You're such a pervy bastard. What happened to my proper English husband?"

"I was corrupted by some young thing," he teased. "I think you might know her."

I laughed again, just as he grabbed the blanket out of my hands and shoved it back into the box.

"I know of one way to fix it," he said lasciviously.

"Oh, yeah, right," I said. "We're at your family's house."

"Technically, it's my house," he replied. "I can do whatever I please in my own house, and that, at the moment, is you."

"Edward," I snickered, "that is so corny."

He suddenly pushed me out of his lap and slapped my ass to get me in gear. "Are you saying you don't want to fuck me? Is that what you're getting at?" he asked playfully. "Because if you are, just say the words, and I'll go."

I grabbed his shirt and yanked him up to me. "Stop that, you know that's not what I meant. But your parents are here."

He bent down to kiss me with a wickedly crooked smile, one that made me putty in his hands. "It's a very large house, love. I think we can get away with it without them ever knowing."

"Yeah?" I asked hopefully.

"Oh, yeah."

* * *

I reread the paragraph Jane had written and tried to make sense of the garbled words on the screen one last time in an effort to fix it. I'd spent hours going through her paper, editing and making little comments to hopefully teach her the proper usage of certain things—even going as far as giving her the definition of certain misused words—though I wasn't sure why. It'd been six weeks since I'd first agreed to tutor her, and in all this time, she'd not listened to me once.

"My fingers are going to bleed before I'm done," I muttered to myself as I retyped another passage.

Jane simply shrugged, typed something into her cell phone, and threw it back on the table as she stood up. "I'll be right back."

"Uh!" I uttered to her back as she walked off. I shouldn't be surprised by this kind of behavior—it was typical—but for some reason, I was. "I wasn't working on this with you or anything. Go right ahead and do… whatever. I'll just keep at it, same as always," I said sarcastically.

I sat back and drummed my fingers on the table, wincing at how sore they were, and decided to find Emmett. If I was going to get through another couple hours of this shit, I was going to need a serious pick-me-up.

I grabbed my wallet and stuffed Jane's and my cell phones in my pockets before I left the table. I didn't have to go far to find Emmett; he was just around the corner, leaning forward with his arms resting on the back of a chair, talking to a girl from one of his thousands of chem classes.

He straightened up as he saw me approach, anticipatorily pulling his keys out of his pocket. "What am I getting now, Bond?"

I laughed. "I could use a coffee laced with some strong whiskey if I'm going to make it through the rest of the afternoon."

"That bad?"

"I'd like to strangle her," I replied.

"Bummer. You should quit."

"You shouldn't have mentioned my name in the first place," I returned.

His head bobbed as he pretended to think about that. "I'll give you that. Grab your stuff, and we'll go. You don't have to help her."

I sighed. "After she's turned in her paper, I'll quit. I've made it this far; I can last another couple of weeks."

He nodded. "So what do you really want?"

"Just something loaded with caffeine from the vending machine," I said. "Like a Diet Mountain Dew."

He stared at me incredulously and pinched at my stomach. "Diet? You're fucking kidding me, right? You weigh what my right arm does."

I shoved his hand away. "No. All that sugar's bad for you teeth."

He laughed dryly as he walked away. "Whatever you say, _Edward_."

The girl sitting at the table watched him leave with a wistful expression. "He's such a great guy."

My brow quirked. "And very taken."

She stiffened and started stacking her papers nervously. "I know."

"Sure ya do."

I went back to the table and put my wallet back in my bag before grabbing the two phones out of my pocket. Jane's suddenly—and literally—screamed in my hand, causing me to drop it to the floor.

My hand flew to my chest, where my heart was pounding from the shock. "Shit."

I picked it up and examined it, making sure I hadn't broken it, when another text message came through. My eyes widened momentarily before narrowing against the insult that was directed toward me.

Obviously, Jane had been talking about me.

My fingers involuntarily started punching buttons so that I could read the conversation. I growled as I read her mocking texts and noted the times they were all sent. The entire time I'd been busting my ass to make her paper decipherable, she'd been making fun of me like we were back in high school Although, Jane wasn't that far off. Maybe she still had that mentality.

_Fuck this._

I threw the phone down in disgust and focused on her paper. I was determined to get through this one last session. Then, she could go…

Yeah, I wasn't finishing that thought.

I was so hell-bent on getting my part of this paper done that I hadn't even noticed Jane come back until she huffed impatiently beside me. I gritted my teeth and took a deep breath so that I didn't curse her out in the middle of the library with all these witnesses. That was a tabloid story I wasn't interested in reading.

I had two more paragraphs left when Jane suddenly launched herself out of her seat and hopped over to a man coming around the corner.

"Uncle Aro!" she cried happily. "You're early!"

I sat there in utter disbelief, trying to match the permanently pissed, emo girl that had been torturing me for the last six weeks to this exuberant, warm girl hugging the man that had just walked toward our table. She looked so weird—pretty, even—with a smile on her face as she talked with him. It had me wondering why she couldn't be like that always; what made her so unhappy that she tried to make us all miserable, when it was clear that she wasn't all that bad.

I glanced over at her cell phone and got mad all over again. Who was I kidding? She was a bitch, this one little instance be damned.

I finally recovered and let my eyes drift to the man who'd so obviously come to visit her, blanching as soon as I realized who it was.

Aro Cruz.

_Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit_.

I jumped out of my chair to greet him and plastered the fake, beaming smile on my face that I kept in reserve for times like this, when Edward's career was in the forefront of my mind.

"Mr. Cruz," I said pleasantly. "I didn't know you were Jane's uncle."

He nodded and smiled back. "Bella, call me Aro. I think I've said that once before."

I resisted the urge to stutter and squared my shoulders. "I'm sorry; it slipped my mind. I had a lot going on the last time I saw you."

His smiled widened. "Yes, but your presentation was flawless. You're quite talented."

I waved him off dismissively. "Thanks, but it's only for Edward. I don't think I could do it otherwise."

"No?"

"Mmm, no. It doesn't interest me."

He raised his brows. "And what does?"

"Well, getting my master's, for one. After that… well, I'm like almost every other college student out there. Undecided," I joked.

Jane stomped her foot, catching mine in the process, and crossed her arms over her chest angrily. Oh, there was the girl I knew…

"Ow," I muttered, moving my foot further away from her.

Aro looked a little annoyed, but gave Jane a smile anyway. Almost as if he was entertaining her, "How's my niece doing? She's not giving you too much trouble, I hope."

"I give no one trouble," Jane said sweetly. "Right, Bella?"

I almost lied, and then decided against it. After what I'd seen on her phone, she didn't deserve it. "She's awful," I stated, casting a meaningful glance over at Jane. "Doesn't do her assignments, waits until the last minute to have me help her with her papers, expects me to do the work for her. I've been half tempted to just let her fail.

Jane let out a squeak of protest. "That's not-"

Aro raised his hand, cutting her off instantly. "I'm paying for Mike's and her tuition. If she's squandering her time and, in essence, my money, I'd like to know about it. Jane is stubborn, at best."

"She's not failing anymore. So I guess that means I'm doing something right, even if she fights me over everything. Today's my last session with her, actually, sir. I'm quitting."

Aro gave Jane a cold look. "She's that bad?"

I sighed, realizing I couldn't just throw her to the wolves like this. He looked a little scary with the way he was staring at her.

_Damn it._

"No, she's not that bad. I just don't have time for it anymore." I hated myself for how nice I was being right now.

"Oh. I see. Well, I'm sorry to hear that." He turned to Jane, who was glowering at me with her hands balled up at her sides. "Jane, I'll be just outside. We need to leave in ten minutes."

He said a quick goodbye and told me to tell Edward "hello" for him before leaving me to deal with Jane.

"What the fuck was that?" she screeched as soon as he was out of sight.

I snatched her phone away from her and made sure the conversation was displayed before handing it back to her. "You're lucky that's all I did."

"You went through my phone?" she shouted, causing people to stare at her.

"No. I went to have Emmett grab me a drink, and I didn't want your phone to get stolen so I took it with me. It went off and scared the hell out of me with that blood-curdling scream-thingy it does, and I dropped it. I picked it up and saw that last message right there." There was a lot more I wanted to say to her, but I decided against it and just started grabbing my stuff off the table and putting it into my bag.

"I finished my work on the paper. If you don't find another tutor before it's due, you should at least get a C, but I'm done. I'm not dealing with your immature shit anymore."

I slung my bag over my shoulder and didn't bother looking behind me. I was almost to the doors when Emmett came barreling through them with my soda.

"Hey, sorry it took so long. I ran into a professor who just wouldn't shut the fu…" He trailed off as he caught my furious expression. "What happened?"

"Nothing. I'm done." I took the soda and twisted the lid off so that I could take a long pull from the bottle. "Walk me to my car?"

"Only if you tell me what happened."

I nodded and huffed. "Fine. Let's go."

* * *

**Edward**

I was sorting through the uncountable Tupperware lids that were in my kitchen when Bella arrived back home from class. She walked through the door and took one cursory glance at what I was doing and groaned.

"Really? Again?"

I looked down to where the counter was covered with what used to be in the cupboards and sighed. She was absolutely right. I'd spent nearly every afternoon this week reorganizing or cleaning some part of the house, simply because I was trying to focus on something other than my impending departure.

"Sorry," I mumbled, neatly stacking the lids back in the wicker basket they'd been in.

"No, I-" She stepped over the blender and giggled. "Jesus, baby. Is there anything left in the cabinets?"

I chuckled and waited for her to wind her way through the maze and reach me. "Probably not."

She wrapped her arms around my waist and put her head on my chest. "Hi," she said with a grin. "How was your day?"

I bent down to kiss her hair. "As you can clearly tell, not so good."

"I'm sorry," she said quietly.

"It's how it is."

"I know, but…" She didn't finish her sentence.

"We've got two days before I go. I want to make the most of them, so let's talk about something else."

We stood there for a few moments before she finally spoke up again. When she did, her voice cracked and she refused to look at me, alerting me to the fact that she'd been trying not to cry just now. I wanted nothing more than to comfort her, but I knew it would only make it worse. So I went along with the charade and pretended I was none the wiser.

"If I help you clean this up, will you go psychotic on me?"

"Of course not," I said, holding her closer to me. "I may tell you exactly where to put things and how to do it the entire time, though."

She laughed once. "So I should just stay out of the way, then."

I pulled in a deep breath so that I didn't tell her yes. "No. It's your kitchen also. You should get a say in how it's all arranged."

"Then I want it back the way it was. I was used to it like that."

"Very well. Let's get to it. I'd like to go out later, if you've not come home with hours of homework to do."

"Where?"

I shrugged. "I just thought we'd do something incredibly touristy."

"Which is?" she prompted.

I flashed a smile. "You'll see."

We worked together to quickly put the kitchen back in order. I couldn't resist and moved a few things around, but for the most part, it was identical to the way it was before; the way Bella wanted it.

I grabbed a couple of blankets out of the closet just outside our bedroom and threw them into the trunk of the car, along with the handled brown bag I'd had in the refrigerator in the garage all afternoon.

Bella watched me put everything in the back of the Ferrari with a frown. "We're taking the Ferrari? And blankets? Where the hell are we going?"

"Like I'm going to say," I laughed.

"Seriously. The Ferrari? Are we going to some spur of the moment press thing that you have to look really badass for?"

"Bella, I've had it for years, and I rarely drive it." I leaned against the door and stared over the hood at her. "When was the last time you saw me pull it out of the garage?"

She pursed her lips. "Never."

"Exactly. It was the first big purchase that I allowed myself after my first leading role. A reward of sorts. It sits most of the time because it means too much for me to drive it and risk it being hit by some moron who can't steer. But it needs to be run every now and then so that nothing clogs up and whatever else… I know nothing about the mechanics of it. I simply do as I'm told. I figure tonight is just as good as another."

"Okay," she agreed. "But what's all the stuff in the bag?"

"Eh, nothing of importance. Not yet, anyway."

She rolled her eyes and opened the car door. "So annoying."

I grinned and got in the car. I quickly started it, laughing as Bella's eyes widened with the deep growl of the engine echoing throughout the garage when I did.

"Holy shit, don't kill me," she said, clinging to her seatbelt so hard, her knuckles were white.

For some reason, this was even funnier to me, and I found myself laughing almost hysterically while Bella simply looked on in confusion.

When I'd finally sobered enough to speak, I said, "Really, love? You honestly think I'm going to drive maniacally down the streets of LA with you _in this car_? I'll likely drive like the old man you say I am."

"Oh." She released the seatbelt and slowly uncurled her fingers and laughed at herself. "That was stupid. I've just never been in a car this fast. It's like riding a roller coaster. You're scared but excited at the same time."

"I'm rather boring. I couldn't speed if I wanted to. There's always someone watching," I sighed.

But it wouldn't always be like this.

Bella rolled down her window and breathed in the warm evening air as I drove to Hollywood Forever Cemetery. As soon as I turned on Santa Monica Boulevard, she realized where we were going and shifted sideways in her seat to watch me.

I ignored her until after I'd paid the parking fee and started to park.

"What?" I finally asked, unable to contain my chuckle.

"Touristy. Blankets. A bag you pulled out of the fridge. Are we watching a movie in the cemetery, Masen?"

"So smart," I replied, pulling into a parking space. "I can hide nothing from you."

"How the hell do you expect to do this without being noticed?"

"I didn't." I shrugged. "I thought we could put on the hats that are in the backseat and then pray for night to fall."

"So this is like a press op _and_ date."

"I hadn't intended it to be…" I replied uncomfortably.

"No, no. It's fine. It's good. You're um… yeah, and the movie will be out next month. You can't hide forever." She grinned excitedly. "Let's go."

We grabbed everything out of the backseat, not bothering to put on the hats, and started toward the movie screen set up in the cemetery. There were quite a few people here already but earlier, I'd arranged for an area to be reserved for us that was far enough away from the screen to be indiscreet, yet still managed to be good.

I laid out one of the blankets and kept the other folded in case Bella got cold after the sun went down. She plopped down and started rummaging through everything; her smile widened more with each item she brought out.

She opened the container of hummus and dipped her finger into it. "You don't even like hummus," she said, sucking the hummus off quickly.

I let out a sharp breath and tried to think of something other than the way her tongue swirled around her finger. "It wasn't about me," I responded. "I was doing something for you."

"You always do."

I smiled. "I've never had someone to cater to and be overly romantic with. I rather enjoy it."

"It's nice. I might sometimes call you a pain in the ass, but it's always nice. I've never had someone give a damn."

"That's not true," I argued.

She waved me off. "Well, all right. So I've had people give a damn. They've just never shown me like you do."

I dropped the subject and decided to open the wine instead. Bella and I ate as the sun set just past the movie screen, talking and laughing and just using the moment to be together since our time was running so short. It was… almost peaceful. The murmurings and pointing fingers were mildly distracting, but, thankfully, everyone was respectful enough to keep their distance and not bother us.

The sky had finally darkened, signaling the start of the show. I watched the film load—after somehow dodging that one question she'd asked all evening, keeping it a surprise—absolutely dying for that moment when Bella finally saw what film was playing tonight.

And then there it was. The opening scene. Bella gasped quietly and grabbed a hold of my arm, forcing me to turn away from where Dustin Hoffman was riding on a moving walkway to her stunned, gorgeous face, all while Simon and Garfunkel played in the background.

I couldn't have envisioned a more perfect moment than this.

"_The Graduate_," she whispered. "How did you…?"

"I may have called in a small favor."

"It's such a good one."

I smiled and leaned forward so that I could kiss her. "I'm glad you like it."

* * *

The sound of the zipper coming together echoed throughout the bedroom with a sort of finality about it, making the fact that I was leaving suddenly—and unfortunately—seem real.

I'd busied myself with anything that came along, needing the distractions of the small, insignificant tasks that came my way. I handled more details about the trip than I normally did, just so I could spend as much time with Bella as possible. We met with Zafrina and did another interview to coincide with the announcement of our marriage next month. Zafrina was all about perfect timing, and what better timing than that of the premiere? The paperwork for our marriage certificate was still being processed and wasn't expected to surface for a little while yet. Since no one expected our sudden marriage, and details hadn't been leaked, we could buy some time so that it benefited us all. As expected, it would help to create more "buzz" around the film. Not that I really cared anymore; things like this meant little to me anymore. Yes, I wanted my movies to do well and receive deserved notice and positive critiques, but I wasn't interested in actively participating like I once was. I'd fulfill my obligations and move on, more than ready for a break before I started working on my last film ever.

The announcement was planned just as I was scheduled to arrive back home for Bella's graduation. I'd scheduled it this way so that I could not only watch my girl cross the stage and accept the diploma she'd worked her arse off for, but to also keep watch of her and make sure that the overzealous paparazzi didn't do anything to possibly hinder her safety or disrupt her life any more than they already did.

There was no anticipating the press' reaction to this news. I'd been single for so long, and with Bella such a short amount of time, I was uncertain if they'd find the news good or look for reasons to doubt it.

And yet, something didn't sit well with me. I was reluctant to leave at all. I wanted to forgo the trip and stay here with Bella, but I ruthlessly pushed the feeling aside and focused on readying myself to leave. It was only natural that I had negative emotions about leaving the first woman I'd truly loved for a month.

"Jesus," I breathed, leaning against the bed and lowering my head as I struggled to stay composed. The sudden realization that I was out of time nearly knocked the wind out of me.

A month. I'd be traveling nonstop for an entire month. Spending quiet nights in empty hotel rooms, answering questions with a smile, and then hopping on a plane to repeat the process all over again had never bothered me. But now—now that I had Bella—I was finding leaving incredibly hard. Harder than even that first time back in November when I'd spent weeks agonizing over her decision and wondering what she was doing, where she was and if she was happy. The way I'd felt then couldn't even compare to the way I felt today. Before, I'd been the one suffering while Bella was still confused and afraid of starting a relationship. Knowing that I would hurt her when I walked out that door went against everything I was.

I glanced down to where Samson was panting and took a deep breath. "I suppose I should find her, eh?"

He barked and turned circles so that I knew he wanted out.

"Come on, then."

I let Samson out back and then searched the house for Bella, finally stumbling upon her in the study after idiotically looking for her everywhere else. She was folded over on herself, gazing at her laptop with an unfocused, miserable expression that caused something unidentifiable to shoot through me.

"Here you are," I said quietly, not wanting to startle her.

She blinked rapidly and nodded, setting her laptop aside. "I thought I'd do some studying, but I can't think."

I crossed the room just as she stood up and dusted something imaginary off her jeans. "I'm sorry," I said lamely.

"Why?"

"You're… sad."

She shrugged nonchalantly, but her chin trembled, giving her away. "You can't do anything about it. You have to work."

I reached out and pulled her to me, breathing her in one last time before I left. "I don't have much time," I murmured against her hair. "The car will be here in just a few minutes."

Her fingers curled into my back, securing me to her. "I don't want you to go," she said through a sob.

I dipped down to kiss her, wanting to taste her fully before I had to go without it for weeks. Her hands wound into my hair, gripping tightly as she molded her body against mine. Words failed me as emotion welled up inside me, and without warning, I shoved everything off the desk, unconcerned with the clanks and crashes as it all fell to the ground, and laid her down on it. I suddenly craved her touch and the feel of her around me.

"I want you," I rasped against her mouth, tugging at her shirt. "Just one last time before I leave."

I ripped away her clothes until she was spread out before me, panting and staring up at me with heavy eyes. I trailed my hands up her thighs, skimming the creamy, silken skin until I was stroking her while my mouth devoured every inch of flesh exposed to me. Her hips bucked up into my fingers as I pushed them into her, driving me absolutely wild with want, while I ungracefully fumbled with the fly of my jeans with the other hand.

I roughly pushed down my jeans and then grabbed her hips, causing her to pout a little, and dragged her to the edge of the desk. My head swam with my need for her, and blood pounded in my veins as I memorized the way she looked beneath me.

Unable to stand it any longer, I fit my mouth over hers again and positioned myself in between her legs. She jerked as I pressed myself against her and broke away from the kiss so that she could speak.

"God, Edward. Hurry the fuck up," she moaned.

I grinned crookedly. "Don't rush me."

I trailed open-mouthed kisses down to her chest, palming her breasts in my hands while my tongue toyed with one of her nipples. I was vaguely aware of the buzzing sound of the gate at the end of the drive and Bella's groan of disapproval, but I was too far gone to care.

"Sod it," I snarled against her skin. "He can wait."

And with that, I thrust into her roughly, raptly watching as her body arched away from the dark wood and she screamed out my name. I lost myself in the moment, finding that I was suddenly and completely wrapped up in her as I worked to make her come. Every part of me unraveled as her eyes met mine and a tear streaked down her cheek. This was the last time I'd hold her, the last time I'd take her until she met back up with me in New York. Missing her didn't describe what I'd feel without her by my side, impishly teasing me and creating such light in my life.

I grabbed her and brought her against me, wanting to be as close to her as I could when I came. Her body tensed around me, and her cries of pleasure spurred me on. I drove into her forcefully and slipped my hand in her hair, tipping her head back with a growl as she climaxed around me.

Just a few thrusts later I followed, clinging to her as I grunted through my orgasm. She dropped her head against my shoulder as she gasped for air and then took my face in her hands as soon as she could manage.

"I love you," she whispered. "Jesus, I love you."

I kissed her hard, unwilling to release her just yet. "I love you. Please be safe. Please," I begged.

"Edward."

"If you do anything stupid, I will hire a fleet of bodyguards to follow you," I swore.

"I'm not going to do anything stupid. Don't have a heart attack."

"I can't be halfway across the world and know that something could happen to you. I'll go mad."

She took my face in her hands and smiled, even as her eyes filled with tears. "I'll go crazy without you here with me, so we'll be even."

I chuckled and hugged her to me. "What will I do without you?"

"I'll be here, baby. I'm just a phone call away."

"I'll miss you. So bloody much."

She swept a piece of hair off my forehead and blinked, finally causing her tears to fall freely.

"I'll miss you, too."


	38. Chapter 38

**Hey, all. Yeah, I'm still alive. RL is insane, my computer had to be replaced, and then I had no internet for a few days. Awesome month, let me tell ya. Good news? Half on the next chapter is already done, so I'm aiming for a Weds update.**

**Thanks to everyone who keeps reading it; I don't know why, but I love you. Thanks to Stratan for beta'ing this. If you didn't already know, I love that guy too ;)**

**Quick note at the bottom!**

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Chapter 38

**Bella**

"Bella."

I groaned sleepily and rolled over, unwilling to get out from the warmth the covers provided me. Edward's scent washed over me, and I squeezed my eyes closed and pretended that he was right here with me. It sounded stupid—I knew he was in Australia—but it helped ease the ache that I'd been feeling since he'd left. Honestly, I was willing to try anything to soothe it. My life was never going to go back to the way it was before Edward came into it, but I didn't want it to. I just needed to feel like I could cope without him here, to not be so fucking dependent on that British bastard all the time.

_Great. Now I'm in a bad mood. Way to go, dumbass._

"Bella."

"Damn it, Rose. I'm sleeping."

"You'll be late for class. Get up." She grabbed the covers and ripped them off of me.

"I hate you."

"Get up," she repeated, "or I'll make Emmett come in here and throw your ass in the shower."

"I showered last night. I'm just going to pull my hair up... Gives me thirty extra minutes. Now go away."

She snorted at my lame excuse to stay in bed. "You're taking a shower. You'll feel better."

"No, I won't" I replied petulantly.

"Bullshit," Rosalie bit out in annoyance. "Just get up." She ran her hand over my back softly and whispered, "Please."

"Only because you said 'please'," I mumbled back.

"Thank you."

I got up and shuffled into the bathroom to get ready. I brushed my teeth, and then stepped under the hot water, letting it wash over my face in hopes that it would help perk me up a little, which—of course—didn't work. I felt more and more… detached as the days passed. I just sort of floated along, only really snapping back to reality when Edward called or during the few chances we got to Skype. The ache consumed me, as unsurprising as it was, and I was more than ready to leave this miserable existence of mine behind and have him back home with me.

Halfway through washing my hair, I heard Rosalie's muffled voice. I strained to listen to her, because I was going to kick Emmett's ass if he was in my bathroom while I was naked, and nearly threw myself out the shower door when I heard her utter "Edward" quietly. The only thing stopping me was the fact that, as previously stated, I was naked.

"Gimme the phone," I demanded, popping my head out from behind the heavy glass door.

"Bella, you're going to get shampoo in your eyes."

"I don't care. Give. Me. The. Phone."

She laughed. "You can't rinse your hair first?"

I shook my head obstinately.

"Suit yourself."

I snatched the phone out of her hand and pushed my soapy hair back so that I didn't ruin it. "Hi, baby."

"Anxious to talk to me, are we?" he chuckled. "I'd have waited, love."

"I wanted to hear your voice," I admitted sheepishly, earning another chuckle.

"I understand you're naked."

I flushed and snuck a glance at Rose. "Yeah."

"And wet."

"Holy shit," I breathed. The sound of his voice had me aching in a completely different way. "Stop doing that."

"I don't know what you're referring to," he replied thickly. "The fact that you're naked and wet has me wanting to catch the next flight home so I can feel you writhing against me when I fuck you?"

I stuttered something incoherent back; Rosalie snickered, so I flipped her off.

"God, I miss you," he moaned. "I miss your taste, your sounds; your scent. I miss the way your body wraps around mine…"

"Wh-" I swallowed hard. "What time is it there?"

"Can't handle it this morning?" he teased.

"Rose is here," I murmured.

"Yes, I know."

"That's not fair," I pouted.

"I suppose it isn't."

I scowled. "You're a dick."

Instead of his usual laughter, he yawned. "All right then, I'll answer your question. It's nearly midnight."

"You sound tired."

"Extremely."

"Then go to sleep. I can talk to you tomorrow."

"Erm, that's why I called, actually. I'll be traveling most of the day tomorrow, so I'm not sure if I'll be able to make our Skype date," he said reluctantly.

"What?" I cleared my throat, hoping he didn't catch how ridiculously disappointed I was over one missed video chat. "That… sucks."

It was no use; his sigh filtered over the line. "Forget I said that. I'll work something out."

"No, it's okay. It's not important." I rested my forehead on the foggy glass and inhaled deeply. I wanted to say more, but I the urge to cry made it impossible.

"Isabella," he growled, "you're more important to me than catching some last minute flight to Tokyo. I'll work something out."

"I know I am," I choked out. I was silent for a moment, biting down on my lip so that I didn't sob through the next part. "You have a job to do and with the time difference, I get it. Don't make things hard for yourself tomorrow. I can talk to you some other time."

"You're certain?"

"Yeah," I said shortly.

"Bella."

I huffed. "Oh, all right. I was looking forward to it and am a little disappointed. That's all."

He groaned. "I'm so sorry, baby."

"Me too," I whispered. "I'll uh… Will I talk to you at all tomorrow?"

"Yes," he said adamantly. "I'll tell everyone to piss off and call when I land, all right?"

I giggled and wiped at my eyes. "Okay. Go get some sleep then."

"I love you," he breathed.

"I love you."

I took the phone away from my ear and pressed "end" before tossing it onto the towel I had waiting for me on the floor.

"Are you okay?" Rosalie asked warily.

"Just peachy," I responded dryly.

I shut the door and trudged back over to the spray of water to finish showering. I focused solely on my usual steps, unwilling to think about how sad I was or how heavy my chest felt over something as unimportant as one missed Skype chat, when we'd talked every single day since he'd left. Tomorrow was no different. I just wouldn't be lucky enough to see the smile that crossed his face when my picture popped up on his screen. It warmed me, if only fleetingly, and I knew exactly why. Everything felt cold and empty without seeing his smile every day.

I turned off the water and went to get out, only to stop and blink in surprise when I saw that Rosalie was getting my makeup, hair dryer, straightening iron—everything I would need to get ready for class—out for me. The scene made me finally lose my grip on my control and abruptly burst into hysterics.

She was one of the few who gave a damn, and from the moment Edward's plane departed from LAX, she'd been right here for me, being unbelievably and uncharacteristically caring. It was the first time anyone—other than Edward—had showed so much concern for me in my adult life.

She whirled around wide-eyed and dropped the straightening iron into the sink. "What the…?"

I shook my head, unable to really answer her. It was like all my unhappiness had culminated this reaction in me today, and there was nothing I could do to stop it.

She hurried over to me and awkwardly wrapped an arm around me from in front of the shower door, letting me cry until I could speak. I wished I could say that it helped, that I felt purged of everything buried inside me, but I didn't. I just felt exhausted afterwards.

"I miss him," I sobbed.

"I know, sweetie. I know."

"I'm sorry. " I backed up, realizing that even though the door served as a barrier between us, I was stark naked in front of her, bawling inconsolably.

She just smirked. "You've got some nice tits, Swan." She immediately looked chagrined. "I mean, Masen."

"Swan's good," I answered, wiping at my eyes. "Hearing 'Masen' from you sounds weird. You can't really get in the habit of saying it anyway. Not for a couple of weeks yet."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." She bent down to retrieve the towel. "Shut the fuck up and get dressed. If Emmett sees you like this, you'll never hear the end of it."

"Oh," I sniffled, taking from her. "I hadn't thought of that."

"Aren't you glad you have me?"

I nodded and stepped out of the shower, now wrapped up in the towel. "Very."

"That was supposed to be a joke, dummy," she said, her brows knitting in concern.

I offered her a watery smile and shrugged. "I know."

* * *

My cell phone buzzed in my book bag, causing the few people around me to stop what they were doing and stare. I shoved my foot down on it, hoping to stifle the sound and focused on the professor at the front of the lecture hall; he was glaring at me.

"Miss Swan?" he asked, arching his brow.

"Sorry," I murmured, blushing hotly. "I forgot to turn it off."

"Then do it now. I don't have time for your disturbances in my class."

I nodded and fumbled for my phone, wincing as it started vibrating again. I glanced at the display and clenched my jaw angrily as I saw the unfamiliar number. It would be my luck to have some jackass with the wrong number calling me on the one day I forgot to turn off my phone in class.

I dismissed the call and went to turn off the phone, only to stop short as the phone number came up a third time. A flurry of scenarios went through my head, all of them involving Edward and an emergency, and I immediately started throwing everything into my bag. There was no way in hell I was going to sit through class unless I knew he was all right.

Panic must have been evident on my face, because the professor inclined his head to the door. "I'll email the assignment to you."

"Thank you." I stood up and slung my bag over my shoulder. "I'm sorry," I said again as I pushed past the other students' legs, although, I didn't know why. My husband's wellbeing came before some random professor's opinion of me any day.

As soon as I hit the steps, I raced to the hall, answering the ever-vibrating phone as soon as I got to the door.

"Hello?" I asked anxiously.

"Is this…? Is this Bella? Bella Swan?" a vaguely familiar voice asked in response.

"Yeah. Who's this?"

"It- it's Phil," he stammered. "Phil Dwyer?"

My heart slammed into my throat. "Where's Renée? Is she okay?"

"She uh, took a fall down the stairs at her apartment," he said tightly, clearing his throat. "She's in labor."

My hand flew up to my mouth. "Oh, my God," I whispered shakily. "What hospital?"

"I know you two aren't really speaking… but I think she'd want you to be there," he rambled instead. "She doesn't know I got your number-"

"Phil!" I screeched. "I don't give a shit about that. What hospital is she in?"

"Cedars."

"Okay. I'll be there as soon as I can."

After I hung up, I called Emmett, thinking that maybe he was finished with his lab work. The phone rang once before it went to voicemail, causing me to curse loudly as I exited the building.

I hurried across campus until I was pacing outside another building, hoping Emmett would come bursting out the doors at any given second.

He didn't disappoint.

He froze mid-step, causing a smaller guy to slam into him when he spotted me. He just looked at him curiously and crossed his arms over his chest as the guy stuttered an apology and scurried away. If I hadn't been so worried, I'd laugh. Emmett _did _look especially menacing right now.

"What is it?" he asked.

"My mom's in the hospital. She's having her baby early. I have to go."

He cocked his head to the side, considering this. "Why?"

"Emmett," I groaned. "That's my brother. I have to know he's okay." I swallowed before I said the next part. "I have to know they're both okay."

He huffed and nodded. "I'll ride with you and have Rosie pick me up later."

I grimaced. "Rose around my mom? Seriously? Have you lost your mind?"

He laughed and slapped my shoulder in an effort to get me to move along. It worked. "Who said anything about letting her come inside the hospital?"

"Oh."

"You think I'm stupid, BDB?" He feigned hurt but wound up looking ridiculous. "I can't believe you."

"Shut up and stop acting like I killed your cat. You look constipated," I giggled.

He stiffened immediately. "I didn't."

I laughed harder. "Yes, you did."

The drive to the hospital was quiet, with the exception of the radio. Emmett let me think things through without bothering me, for which I was extremely grateful. I knew that seeing Renée could end up disastrous. I was already an emotional wreck; all I needed was one asinine comment from my mother about marriage, Edward, Charlie—life in general, it really didn't matter—and I'd lose my cool. And that was something I couldn't do. Nurses could leak information to the tabloids, and I refused to have my dirty laundry, so to speak, with my mother made public knowledge.

I parked and started grabbing my phone, purse, the Blackberry, my book bag—anything I thought I might need while I sat there since I had no idea how long it actually took to have a baby. Birth scenes in movies were bullshit, and I could be here all night long, depending on how long it took Renée to… progress? Was that the right term?

I exhaled sharply and pulled the keys out of the ignition. I didn't have the slightest fucking clue what was supposed to happen and quickly realized that I had a lot of research to do before I could consider myself even remotely prepared for parenthood. It was a little eye opening. I still wanted it, the whole happily ever after with Edward, the dog, and a couple of kids, but I wasn't really ready for it yet. That was easy to remedy, though. I'd just go buy a bunch of pregnancy and baby books and study up on it. I was good at that.

I snickered at myself and shook my head, glancing over at Emmett to see he was staring at me evenly. I knew that look; I hated that look. It was what he did every time he was either concerned or thought I was going to flip out.

He didn't need to do either.

"It's fine," I said shortly, opening the car door.

Emmett didn't move, which pissed me off.

"Get the fuck out of the car!" I shouted. "I don't have time for this, Emmett. I said it was fine."

"You don't have to go. You're happy-"

An incredulous laugh burst out of my chest. "I'm _not_ happy, Em."

"Not right now, no. But you're happy with Edward. _Genuinely_ happy. You don't have to let her ruin that."

I sagged against the seat and shook my head. "I don't think she will. Not this time."

"_What?"_

"Did you know she calls Edward to check up on me?"

He blinked. "No shit?"

I nodded. "A lot, apparently. Ever since we came back from our honeymoon, she's made an effort to be _my_ mother." I swiped away the tear that fell. "I don't know if it's too little, too late… or if I'm glad. I want to be glad, Emmett. I want to have some kind of healthy, normal relationship with her."

"But?" he prompted.

"But I'm so scared that she's just going to change her mind in a few months. She always does."

"Well, maybe she won't this time." I simply stared at him in shock. "Hey, I'm just saying," he chuckled. "You act like she's changed or something, and I as much as I'd love to tell you otherwise, she's your mom. You know her better than anyone else. So maybe she won't. Who knows?"

"Maybe," I conceded. I still had my doubts, though.

"Just keep your guard up and remember we'll all be here if she goes back to being the way she was before."

"Okay," I replied, feeling more resolute about it. I could handle it. I could try one last time and make it out alive. I was too hardened against her bullshit not to.

We had to ask how to get to the labor and delivery wing, since neither of us had ever really been inside a hospital before, much less that particular area. We took a couple of wrong turns, laughing when we ended up in cardiology, before finally making it to the right place.

I asked one of the nurses for Renée's room number, and then left Emmett in the waiting room. He was adamant that I talk to my mom alone and offered to wait for me in there, instead. Then, I made the trek toward Renée's room. I started shaking with nerves the closer I got to it. I heard a small cry of distress as I drew near and hovered outside the door until whatever was going on inside was over. It all just felt so… _awkward_ all of a sudden.

I took a deep breath and finally knocked. Phil opened the door a few seconds later, looking incredibly frazzled. He hurried me inside and shut the door quietly behind us. I had to blink a few times to get used to the darkness of the room. They had all the lights off and the curtains partially closed, in what Phil whispered was an effort for Renée to rest.

Renée twisted in the bed, causing the loud thumping sound in the room to falter for a moment before continuing again. Her mouth dropped as soon as she saw me, and she scrambled to sit upright in the bed.

"Bella! What are you doing here?"

"Phil called," I replied, wringing my hands together. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. Just a little clumsy."

I took another step toward the bed and noticed a purpling bruise that bloomed across her cheek. "Jesus fucking Christ, Renée! How far did you fall?"

"Not far," she hedged. "My center of gravity is off, that's all." I looked at her strangely, and she grinned. "You just wait. One of these days, you'll know exactly what I'm talking about."

I glanced away, unwilling to talk about Edward's and my future with her. "Is the baby…?"

She nodded. "I didn't fall on him, if that's what you're wondering. I just happened to go into labor because of the stress. Ruined my entire birth plan," she griped. "I can't do it at home now with the _risks_."

"But you didn't…" I was confused.

She pointed to Phil and smiled again. "Blame him. I am."

He laughed under his breath. "I want them to both be checked out by a doctor as soon as possible. She's mad at me for making her stay at the hospital."

"Oh." It made sense. It was something Edward would do.

"I'm sorry," she said suddenly. "Bella, I'm so sorry."

"Yeah. I know." I sat down in the chair beside the bed and pulled it closer. "I don't know how I feel about that still."

"But you believe me?" she asked hopefully.

"After you calling my husband nearly every day to check up on me for the last two months, how could I not?" I asked, shrugging.

She opened her mouth to respond, but stopped and cast a glance over at Phil just as a contraction hit. I watched in awed silence as she worked through it. Suddenly, her face contorted further in pain as she grabbed at her stomach, and I couldn't take it anymore. My hand shot out to hers, and I let her grip it tightly until the pain slowly subsided.

"Do you need anything?"

She shook her head. "No, thanks. You can go, Bella. I appreciate you coming, but you don't have to stay and watch this. It's boring."

"Uh, no. I'm going nowhere." There was no way I could leave now. It was inexplicable, but there it was.

"Okay," she breathed. "I'm glad you're staying."

I cleared my throat and nodded. "Yeah, me too."

* * *

**Edward**

Interviews had quite honestly become the bane of my existence as of late. Over and over again the same questions were asked, and I was somehow expected to smile and come up with some interesting answers without sounding repetitive. I'd come up with more ways to say that working with the cast and crew of _Rogue _had been phenomenal than I could count. Group interviews, where Jacob, Tanya, and I were all interviewed together—like this one I was currently in the middle of—were more enjoyable than interviews I did alone. I had Tanya's deliberate avoidance of anything involving her baby and Jacob's idiocy to entertain me. They kept the focus off of me, something that was more than welcome considering how I felt about being away from home, and more importantly, Bella.

I still had two weeks of this rubbish left before I got a break. I wasn't entirely sure how I was going to manage, honestly. Every day that passed only made me think of Bella more. I missed her more than I thought that I would, which seemed impossible. I'd known from the very beginning that I'd miss her terribly, but doing so to the point of feeling crippled? That was completely unexpected.

I glanced back up at the journalist and smiled ingenuously. She was a tiny thing, possibly smaller than Alice, and needed a translator to ask me questions. She tucked her pin-straight black hair back behind her ear and blinked her dark eyes a few times, and I realized she was waiting on me to answer the question. I'd been so distracted; I hadn't even heard her speak.

"Get your shit together, old man," Jacob murmured beside me.

"I thought she was still talking to you."

He laughed once. "She stopped talking to me about five minutes ago, dumbass."

"What were you saying?" I asked politely, letting my eyes dart to the translator sitting next to her. "I apologize. I'm a bit jet-lagged and scatterbrained." _To say the least._

She smiled in return once the translator had told her what I'd said, and then quickly said something in Japanese that I could only understand three words of.

"She was just asking how your fiancée was doing back in LA," the translator said to me. "We see the occasional picture of her, but it's usually to and from campus. She said Bella's been lying low," she said with a laugh, "and it's causing a lot of speculation."

"Ah." I nodded. "She has, but not for the reason anyone is thinking. She's… how should I put this? She's only tolerant of the paparazzi."

My answer was relayed to her, followed by another quick phrase in Japanese, translated to be, "How so?"

"She never went into our relationship looking for fame. It was actually something she didn't want at all." I reached over and grabbed my water, taking a sip before I continued. "It was why we kept our relationship as secret at first. She wasn't interested in being in the spotlight, but unfortunately, it was inevitable from the moment she realized she fancied me. It can't be avoided in my line of work."

I sat back and waited for my answer to be translated, turning to Jacob and rolling my eyes. "How long have we been here?" I asked lowly.

He shrugged. "Thirty minutes?"

I sighed. "At the rate we're going, we'll be here all day long."

He chuckled. "So leave."

I made a face. "No. That's irresponsible."

Tanya laughed. "Irresponsible or not, I'm going to leave if this doesn't move along. I need to eat something soon."

I nodded. "What do you want?"

"I want sushi, but I can't eat it. So I'll just settle and look at yours and Jacob's and drool."

"I'll make sure you have a bib to catch it," Jacob replied.

"Shut up, asshole," she snapped back, glowering at him.

My mobile buzzed in my pocket, alerting me to a text message. I shifted and tried to ignore it, but my interviewer had something else in mind.

She said something else, and I nearly pulled my hair out. This was the most frustrating part about press tours: the language barrier. It took five minutes to answer one bloody question.

"She says, 'you're welcome to answer it, Mr. Masen. It'll give me a few minutes to look over my questions for you and ask Tanya a few. I fully intend to take advantage of your candor today'."

"All right," I chuckled, gesturing to Tanya. "Have at it."

I pulled the mobile out of my pocket and retrieved the text message. The picture that popped up on the screen warmed me instantly. Bella was posing with a tiny, white bundle in her arms at the foot of a hospital bed, beaming for the camera.

_Meet my brother, Riley Philip Dwyer, baby. Isn't he so cute? I swear, Ren__é__e's going to have to fight me for him when she leaves._

The baby was a bit early, but obviously healthy. I studied the picture and had a moment of bliss, seeing Bella so happy, which was quickly overshadowed by anger. I'd missed it. I'd been instrumental in keeping Renée involved in Bella's life, and I'd missed the day Bella finally gave her mother a second chance. I wanted nothing more than to give Bella some sort of support when she'd need it, and I was on the other side of the world, talking about trivial things and discussing a movie that I'd already said more than necessary about.

I inhaled deeply and sent a quick text back. _He's gorgeous. Tell Ren__é__e and Phil congratulations for me. _

_He was born yesterday but with the time difference, I couldn't call you until now._

_That's all right. I'm in the middle of an interview, anyhow. I'll call as soon as I can. I love you._

_Love you._

I slid the mobile back into my pocket and focused on finishing the interview. I kept the act up, pleasantly talking with everyone, when I what I really wanted to do was throw a few things to help relieve some of this frustration building inside me. It helped nothing in the long run, but I'd at least feel better for a moment, anyway.

The interview was finally over, and Jacob, Tanya, and I were all escorted out of the building by security. We signed autographs for a few minutes, and then hopped in the car waiting for us. Dinner was next on the agenda, obviously at a sushi restaurant to appease Tanya's craving. As soon as the driver maneuvered the car out into traffic, I dropped the act. I could care less if Tanya and Jacob knew how unhappy I was.

I hadn't spoken a word since we'd left the interview, retreating back into myself and thinking of how much I missed Bella. My appetite was gone; I simply pushed the pieces of sushi through the soy sauce, unable to actually force myself to eat any of the dragon roll I'd ordered. Absurdly enough, it only served as another reminder of Bella and all the times we'd eaten sushi in bed while one of the many DVDs I had sitting in my collection played in the background. The intention had always been to broaden Bella's film knowledge, since she'd seen hardly any films at all, but we'd been too wrapped up in each other to pay attention to a single one.

I was a horrible tutor, letting my selfish desire to shag her interfere—something I was more than ready to do again. My body responded instantly to the thought of her lying in bed beside me in nothing more than a pair of my boxers and a t-shirt, and I had to grind my teeth against the discomfort. I needed to play around with her this evening on the phone. It wasn't the same as being in bed with her, but it was infinitely better than my hand and a hot shower.

I merely had to make sure I didn't call during one of her classes or else my frustration—sexual and otherwise—would consume me.

Jacob whistled and snapped his fingers in front of my face. "Eat. I'm not going back to LA just to get my ass kicked by Bella when you go home sick."

"Mind your own business," I shot back.

He held up his hands in retreat. "Fine. But don't say I didn't warn you."

I shoved the plate away from me and threw down my chopsticks. "I'll be right back," I mumbled. "Loo."

I splashed cool water on my face and dragged my wet hands through my hair, trying to pull myself out of this foul mood. It wasn't Jacob or Tanya's fault that I was so miserable, and I felt incredibly guilty for taking it out on them, which only served to compound my emotions further.

I came out of the loo and nearly ran into Tanya as I turned the corner. I gripped her shoulders so that she didn't fall and released her when she'd steadied herself, smiling down at her apologetically.

"I'm sorry. I seem live in my head these days. Are you all right?"

She nodded and pushed past me, only to abruptly turn around. "Edward?"

I lifted my brows, waiting for her to continue.

"What was it about that message that made you so unhappy?"

I chuckled and ran my hands through my hair again. "You noticed that?"

"You seemed fine until your phone went off." She shrugged. "You don't have to answer. I'm just being nosey. I seem to need to know what's going on with everyone lately. I don't like it," she muttered with a frown.

I nearly laughed, but opted against it at the last second. It probably wasn't wise to laugh at a hormonal pregnant woman trying to cope with being more selfless than usual.

"Bella's mum had her baby, and Bella sent me a picture of the two of them together. I was just angry that I'd missed it. It was a big deal for her to be there."

"Bella's mom had a baby?" she repeated in shock. "Jesus, that's an age difference."

"It is," I agreed.

"Did uh…" Her hands flew down to her stomach nervously. "Did everything go well?"

"It would appear so. Bella's text was full of excitement."

"Good." She swallowed hard. "That's one of the things that I worry about. Something going wrong."

"For your sake or the baby's?" I questioned.

"Both, I guess." She shrugged awkwardly. "I don't know how to explain it."

I smiled. She was slowly becoming a mother, as much as it shocked me to admit. "It's an adjustment."

"Yeah," she said quietly. "I'll be alone when it happens. I think that's what scares me the most, honestly."

"Don't you have family?"

"I have two sisters that live in Portland, but I don't really talk to them much."

"So call them. You don't have to be alone."

She sighed. "Easy for you to say. You don't know what I did to them."

"Tanya," I asked slowly, "am I standing here, talking to you, after everything you did to Bella and me?"

She nodded once.

"I think if I can overlook your idiocy, your sisters can as well."

"Thanks."

I went back to the table and laid a few notes down to pay for my part of dinner. I wasn't in the mood for idle conversation and wanted to hear Bella's voice for a few minutes before I finally allowed myself to sleep.

Tanya came back just as I'd put my jacket on and looked at me in disbelief. "Um, we have a photo call in an hour."

"Tell them I'm ill."

Jacob's mouth dropped open. "Edward, I don't think they'll-"

"They'll believe you," I said dryly. "Jacob, I've never once flaked out on any part of this job. Just give me this one time."

He nodded. "Okay. You're sick. We've got it."

"Thank you."

The ride back to the hotel was mercifully quick. I was led into the hotel by security and escorted to my room. I thanked the guards and slipped into my room, intent on taking a shower before I called Bella. With the time difference, I was going to wake her up regardless; I might as well be comfortable when I did so.

I showered quickly and fell back against the bed as I dialed her number, closing my eyes and waiting for that moment that Bella answered.

"Hey, baby!" she giggled drunkenly. I blinked, taken aback by the sound of her voice. I'd expected it to be thick with sleep. "What are you doing?"

"Erm, I think I should be asking you that question," I chuckled, listening to the loud music blare in the background.

"I'm at a party!" she said excitedly.

"A party?"

"Mm-hmm. Rosalie dragged me to some fucking dude-I-don't-know's graduation party, even though I wanted to just stay at home. You should tell her that was… Not. Nice." She hiccupped and giggled again. "I wanted to fuck around with you on the phone. Now I can't."

"It's not-"

"Yes, I can!" she suddenly exclaimed. "I can sneak into the bathroom!"

"No, that's all right."

"Fuck, no it's not. I need… _something,_ Edward."

I ran my hand over my face and sighed. "Dear God, Bella. You're completely pissed."

"So? Emmett's driving. He's the fucking sober bitch tonight," she snickered.

"I'm not entirely comfortable with you being pissed at a party, when I'm all the way across the world in Japan. I-"

"Oh, fucking relax. Stop being such an old man," she said in exasperation.

"I'm not being an old man. I'm making sure you're safe," I argued.

"Pfft. Whatever. You're acting like my father with the safety police talk. Stop it."

I groaned and decided to change the subject. "How's your mum? Riley?"

She wasn't quite pissed enough for it to work, unfortunately. "They're fine. Don't try to distract me. You were sucking the fun out of my night."

"I don't want to do this, baby. I called because I miss you."

She was silent for a moment; the loud music thumped in the background, and then I heard a sniffle.

"Bella," I said quietly. "Don't cry."

"I miss you so much," she breathed. I heard a rustling sound as she sat down somewhere. "Can't you come home early?"

"I wish I could. We've not that much longer left."

"Yeah."

"Is Emmett near?"

"He's standing by the door. Why?"

"Do you mind letting me speak with him for a moment? I only want to ask him something."

She debated it for a few seconds before finally agreeing. "Okay."

There were a lot of rustling and odd noises as she handed Emmett the phone. I leaned up, concerned that maybe she'd taken a fall, and suddenly heard Emmett's voice boom into the phone.

"Fuck, Edward. I haven't ever seen her this bad," he said, once he stopped yelling at Bella to 'sit down and shut up'.

"Take her home. Please."

"Now?"

"Now," I confirmed. "I don't care if you have to throw her over your shoulder and haul her out of there against her will. She needs to go home. She'll be furious with herself if some random student takes a video of her while she's like this and sends it into the tabloids."

"Oh, I hadn't thought of that."

"She normally would, but obviously, her cognitive abilities are a bit hindered."

He laughed. "That's putting it nicely. Call a spade a spade. She's completely fucked up."

I made a noncommittal noise of agreement.

"I'll get Rosalie and Angela and hit the road. You wanna say anything back to her?"

"No, she'll only argue with me again. Just call me when you get her home so I know she's safe."

"Will do."

I ended the call and put my mobile on charge before lying back onto the bed and attempting to watch the telly. I stared at the screen for what felt like an eternity, unable to really concentrate until I knew Bella was safely… I did a quick mental calculation in my head and groaned. It was two am back in LA. She was going to love the stories the tabloids came up with for this uncharacteristic late night outing.

I must've fallen asleep—jetlag was beginning to take its toll on me, so I wasn't really surprised—when I was woken up by my mobile's chime coming from the nightstand next to me.

"She's in bed?" I asked groggily, fully expecting it to be Emmett.

"Edward, it's me," Alice said, instead. She sounded like she'd been crying, instantly causing me to panic.

"What is it?" I bolted upright and ran my hand through my hair. "Jesus, tell me she's all right. Please," I begged. "I can't-"

"I don't know. I just… I can't see anything, really. But something's not right," she said fearfully. "Just go home, Edward. Go home _now."_

I threw myself out of bed and started haphazardly throwing things into my carry on bag while Alice was silent on the other end of the line, most likely concentrating on whatever it was she saw. I glanced around, making sure I just enough to get me through the long trip home, before I started to get dressed. Everything else could be shipped back to LA for me later.

"I'm on my way. Keep trying to get a hold of her?"

"Of course." She paused. "Edward, without trying to sound absurd, I think they know."

"What?" I asked, uncomprehending. "Who knows?"

"The press, Edward," she said, making my stomach drop. "They know the two of you are married."

* * *

**Like I said. Update next week.**

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	39. Chapter 39

**Imma have a quick little Sally Field moment up here. *clears throat***

**Thank you SO much for making this fic hit 3k reviews! I can't even begin to tell you how much that made my day.**

**Thanks to the badass (as always) Stratan for making me laugh about the drunken Bella behavior and pointing out a couple of things. I should like, pay you or something... meh. NM ;)**

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Chapter 39

**Bella**

"The room is spinning," I muttered, doubling over myself and staring at the pattern on the plush burgundy rug. My hair flopped into my face, and I spit a few strands out inelegantly. At this point in the evening, nothing much mattered anymore.

I had way too much alcohol in my system, and I couldn't exactly remember how it happened—but I supposed that was the point, wasn't it, to drown your sorrows? I hadn't intended to come to the party, much less drink, but Rosalie and Angela were extremely persuasive (and persistent) when need be. Instead of being holed up in bed, watching something on TV with the dog snoring on the couch in the corner, I suddenly found myself changed into some teensy, long-sleeved black dress and my Louboutins that Edward had bought me for my first meeting as his agent.

And now here I sat… numb, yet miserable at the same time. How the hell was that even possible? Alcohol was supposed to make you feel good and forget. All it did for me was intensify everything. I missed Edward severely; I bounced up and down happily when a specific song came on; I got angry over nothing. I'm sure I was the epitome of some crazy celebrity right now.

"I bet," Emmett replied dryly. "Come on. Let's get Rosie and Angela and go."

"I don't want to go," I slurred, throwing myself back up to an upright position. It was kind of a Tawny Kitaen move, and yes, thanks to one of many of Renée's phases, I was well aware of that awful eighty's reference. Just give me an old, white Trans Am and a dude with way too much hair, and I was golden. "Oh, that was a mistake," I said as my stomach rolled.

He threw a trashcan at me. "Puke in that."

I threw it back at him; my aim was horrific, and it ended up knocking the lamp that sat on the end table over.

"Oops," I said, blushing. Or, at least, I think I was blushing. I couldn't really feel my face.

"Jesus, Bella. Get the fuck up before you make an ass out of yourself and have it make front page news."

I wished I could say that statement sobered me up, but it didn't. "Let 'em," I said with an awkward wave of dismissal. "I'm so tired of pretending to be perfect."

Emmett's face softened as he stood me up. "I know. Where'd you leave the other two drunkards at?"

"At the karaoke machine," I giggled.

"Oh, fuck," he groaned.

I giggled harder. "Rosalie can't sing," I said in what was supposed to have been a whisper. It just wound up sounding like a deranged hiss.

"Dear God, BDB. Get some fucking gum. Your breath is rank."

I ignored him, focusing on more important things that I'd just now noticed—my cell phone was no longer in his hand. "Hey!" I cried indignantly. "You hung up with Edward!"

"Uh, yeah," he said, staring at me like I'd grown a second head. "A while ago."

A sob burst free from my chest. "Why? I could have talked to him some more!"

"Yeah, that's not happening. You're barely lucid."

"Bull-fucking-shit," I snapped, and then proceeded to try to give myself a sobriety test, missing the tip of my nose with my index fingers by a long shot. "Damn it."

He chuckled. "I'll record you talking. Let you listen to it tomorrow. Maybe I'll leak it to the press."

I gasped. "Shut the fuck up! You wouldn't!"

He arched his brow and smirked. "What happened to being tired of pretending to be perfect?"

"I lied. I don't want you leaking it to the press," I pouted. "Please don't. It'll make Edward realize how much better he could do than me."

His mouth dropped open in shock. "Do you really believe that?"

I sighed, "No. I guess not. I just keep waiting to fuck up so bad that he can't look at me again."

"Why? You're the center of his universe. It's kind of fucking creepy."

"It is not," I objected.

He grinned. "Then what's with the bi-polar drunken shit?"

I shrugged. "I don't have the slightest clue what I'm doing and he's… Well, he always knows what to do."

"So you think, but really, none of us do. Now, walk your happy ass through that door, or else I'll definitely record this episode of The Drunken Bella Show," he warned, taking out his cell phone, "and post it with the BDB pics I'm sure I can find in your bedroom."

"Fine," I grumbled, trying to put one foot in front of the other without falling flat on my face. My shoes needed to go for that to be possible. "Shiiiiiiiiiit, I'm drunk."

He grabbed my arm and kept the floor from coming up and slapping me in the face. "Yep."

"Why'd you let me get so drunk?" I moaned, fumbling with the strap of one of my heels. "Help."

"Blame my girlfriend. She was the one pouring shots down your throat," he laughed. "I'm supposed to be a bodyguard, not a babysitter."

"They're not mutually exclusive?"

He laughed once. "No."

I held on to Emmett as we made our way through the crowd, smiling at the people who tried to talk to me as we passed, at least I hoped it was a smile. I still couldn't feel my face. Anything more, like a "hello" or wave—and God forbid someone make me hold an actual conversation; it was a miracle I'd just spoken to Emmett—seemed impossible.

"Bella!" My name was screeched over the sound system as we closed in on where Rosalie and Angela were dancing around with microphones.

"Bella Swan, get over here!" Rosalie wildly waved me over.

I hadn't intended to go up there, but the next thing I knew, I had a beer and a microphone shoved in my face by two very enthusiastic friends.

_How the fuck did that happen?_

"I don't know this song!" I shouted at them.

Rose scoffed. "Everyone knows this song!"

I shook my head. "Not me!"

Angela laughed and sang a line before asking me, "How can you not know _Love Shack_, Bella? Everyone knows this song!"

I shrugged. "So you two keep saying."

I really wasn't sure how I _didn't _know this song, judging by the way the crowd was dancing and singing along with them. Call it another one of my ridiculously sheltered moments, I suppose.

"I'm gonna… Yeah." I shoved the microphone back at Rosalie and stumbled away from them. "Finish your song so we can go," I called over my shoulder.

Watching them try to sing was the funniest thing I'd ever witnessed in my life. Rosalie was so off key, the tune was almost unrecognizable, and Angela kept yelling that she couldn't hear anything; Rosalie was so loud that Angela was constantly speeding up the song, singing the line ahead of the current one.

They finally came together and screamed, "Tin roof! Rusted," along with the rest of the crowd, with the exception of me. I still didn't know what fucking song it was.

The song was finally over, and they placed the microphones back on the stands before dancing over to us. Rosalie grabbed my arm and twirled me around once.

"You're not really ready to go home, are you Bella?" she whined, which alerted me to the fact that she was just as drunk as me. Rosalie Hale never whined. "You need to loosen up. Have some fun without Edward."

"Yes. I want to go home. Samson needs to be let out, and I'm feeling kind of nauseated. Thanks for that, by the way," I said wryly.

This had been such a fucking bad idea. Now that we were getting ready to go, I was starting to realize that tomorrow I'd likely be extremely hungover… and alone. Not to mention the fact that I already couldn't remember half the night, bringing a moment of absolute terror when I realized that Emmett's threat of having my actions displayed for the world to see wasn't so idle. _He_ would never do it, but that said nothing for everyone else here.

"No problem," she sang, thankfully pulling me away from that thought.

I'm not entirely sure how, but Emmett managed to wrangle us all into the Range Rover. Since I was far too inebriated to drive again, I sat myself in the passenger's seat, buckled up, and waited for Rosalie and Angela to get situated in the back.

Emmett started the car and adjusted the seat, grumbling about how tiny I was, and then backed out of the driveway. The moment he put the car back into drive, the world around us seemed to just… erupt with insanity. Cars, SUVs, and vans all flipped on their headlights and pulled away from their spot on the edge of the property, following us down Mulholland Drive.

My phone started vibrating in Emmett's pocket. He pulled it out and threw it at me, more focused on the road ahead than where it landed. "This keeps going off," he muttered. "It's driving me crazy."

He tightened his gripped the steering wheel and tried to wind down the curves at a decent speed, but some of the more ambitious photographers were closing in on him.

I abruptly felt claustrophobic. "Emmett, get us out of here," I said through my teeth. Which would wind up being the biggest mistake of my life.

He pushed down on the accelerator and nodded once. "I'm trying."

"What the hell is going on?" Angela screeched from the back. "Bella, answer your phone!"

I shook my head vehemently, watching everything pass me by while my vision blurred further with tears. "No. I know what it is."

We were too late. They all knew about us eloping and wanted to get their pictures and a statement from me. There was no other explanation for this sudden surge of interest. I'd never been without a photographer near since the moment Edward and I stepped out of Aro Cruz's house, but this… It wasn't even like this in the beginning. This was a whole new level of craziness.

"What? It'd better be fucking good, Bella," Emmett said tightly, his eyes darting around us. "I can barely fucking see with all these lights around us."

"Fuck!" I pulled at my hair in a very Edward-like move. "They know about us getting married. Someone must've found out while we were stupidly busy getting drunk. It's the only thing that would cause this… frenzy. Christ, this is bad. This is so bad. Edward is going to kill me."

"Did you say something?" Emmett asked in disbelief. "Please tell me you didn't drunkenly ramble to some college frat boy back there."

I racked my brain, trying to think of everything I'd said while I'd been drinking. Satisfied that I wasn't the leak, I shook my head. "I didn't say anything."

"He's not going to kill you," Angela said from behind me. "He'll fix it."

"Yeah, okay." She was right; he would.

Emmett sat up straighter in the driver's seat and pushed the rearview mirror up so that the lights weren't shining directly in his eyes anymore. The SUV wound through the curves and down the mountain, slowly gaining speed as we tried to make our escape.

"Emmett, slow down," I said, gripping onto the handle above the door as he maneuvered one of the hairpin turns.

"You told me to get you the hell out of here."

"Yeah, well, I lied. You're going too fast."

He didn't respond.

"Emmett!" Rosalie screamed. "Slow down! "You're freaking me out back here!"

In that instant, it all shifted toward something none of us could have anticipated. Vehicles continue to swarm around us, inching us closer to the edge in one of the few places without a guardrail, and in one split second, the ground gave way, causing the front tire to slip over the edge.

I wish I could tell you that time suspended and allowed me to memorize every moment of that crash, that I saw my life flash before my eyes, or had a final thought of Edward before we tumbled over the cliff, but I didn't. Maybe it was the alcohol that clouded my mind, or maybe I just wasn't like everyone else involved in near death experiences. It was all just a blur; just random details coming into focus here and there, all while the SUV tumbled and the ground closed in on us. The creaks, groans, and smashes of the car quickly being demolished, coupled with the screams of us all, reverberated through me as we fell.

It was the one part of the crash that I'd never forget.

I heard the screeching of the tires as Emmett tried to stop, felt the jerking of the car as it overtook his steering. My stomach leapt into my throat as we plunged over the edge and into the ravine.

The car shook us violently before we finally connected to something, jarring us all. A boulder, causing the dashboard to cave in on me, had smashed in the front fender of the Range Rover in. My head was slammed into the window at the moment of impact. I could feel the warmth of the blood as it exited the wound and blinked rapidly, trying to dispel the overpowering blackness that threatened to consume me. The glass made a sickening sound, crackling against my face in a web of tiny fractures as we plummeted.

One last, hard jolt as the car finally rested on its side, kept from rolling down the cliff further by a tree, and everything went eerily silent.

That was when the pain finally registered.

My head throbbed; my torso felt as if something was grinding itself into me. I tried to move, only to find that I would quickly wish I hadn't. Pain sliced through my abdomen and down my legs, causing me to scream out once before I clamped my mouth shut. Screaming did_ nothing_ to help the pain in my head; it only made my stomach finally heave, expelling whatever alcohol hadn't been absorbed by my body yet out onto the piece of the floorboard that was still visible.

In and out of consciousness I sat, waiting for someone to pull me out of the vehicle. I couldn't move, trapped not only by the car, but also by the unspeakable agony that ripped through me every time I shifted just an inch. I could hear the commotion outside, but it was distorted, incoherent. Nothing made sense, except for one single, solitary word: "Bella".

I fluttered my eyes open and saw James crouched down next to me, looking absolutely panic stricken by the position I was in.

"Hi," I croaked, sobbing as pain rocketed through me again.

"Help's on the way," he replied.

I wanted to nod, but opted to close my eyes instead. The blackness was so much more soothing than reality. Inch by glorious inch it overwhelmed me…

"Hey!" he shouted. "Look at me!"

I groaned but did as I was told.

"You know who you are, who I am?" he asked anxiously.

"Bella." I weakly lifted my free arm to point at myself. "You're… James."

"Yes." His eyes darted around the interior of the car. "Everyone seems… okay."

Oh, how I wanted those words to relieve my pain, but they did nothing. "Good."

"You've lost a lot of blood," he whispered.

A garbled answer came out in response. I was losing focus of everything, and my eyes just kept slipping closed on their own volition. I took a deep breath and felt a tear fall down my cheek.

"Were you with them?" I finally managed to get out.

He shook his head. "I live across the street. So you married Masen, huh?" he asked, trying to make light of the situation and keep me conscious at the same time.

"In February," I said softly.

"Congratulations."

"Mmm."

Sirens closed in on us, slowly getting louder with each passing second. Morphine was the one thing on my mind. That instantaneous relief that would come from one little pinprick seemed heavenly right now. I'd been obliterated with alcohol; my body had felt its numbing effects completely, and I was still left with excruciating pain. I couldn't imagine feeling this sober and was more grateful for my drunken behavior earlier than I'd ever thought possible.

"Call Edward," I told James as new, commanding voices drew near. "Please."

He nodded and backed away from the Range Rover. "I'll do it right now."

"Thank you," I whispered brokenly.

A paramedic suddenly appeared and deftly inserted an IV into my arm while asking me all kinds of questions about the crash and the events leading up to it. He ran through my vitals and spoke to some of the other officers and paramedics about Emmett, Rosalie, and Angela's conditions, but I couldn't understand any of it. The only thing I managed to grasp was that _I'd_ gotten the worst of it. The point of impact came from _my_ side of the car.

"Can I give her some morphine?" he shouted out to another paramedic.

_Thank you, Jesus._

I assumed the other paramedic gave him the go-ahead, because he was loading a needle up with a clear solution when he turned back around. The tiny pinch caused a sudden warmth to fall over me.

And then it suddenly hit me that everyone had been entirely too quiet in this situation. "Why's everyone so quiet? Are they okay?" I asked, on the verge of panicked tears.

"They're fine. You all were unconscious," The paramedic explained. I gasped and nearly vomited as pain shot through me again. "It's expected," he said gently. "Don't be alarmed."

"'Kay," I slurred. "Can I- Can I sleep now?" I asked dreamily.

He chuckled. "The morphine's working."

I sighed and closed my eyes. I wasn't sure how much time passed before I heard the sound of hydraulics echo around me as the crew worked to cut me out. Jaws of Life, I knew that much. There was a flurry of action and instructions as they kept trying to free me, causing the car to jostle with me as it was pried apart. Each movement had me screaming again, regardless of the morphine, and I eventually started pleading for them to stop. I couldn't bear it any longer. I needed the pain to go away.

I needed Edward, his strength and his comfort. I was so weak; each whimper and plea for them to just leave me here just drained me further and was always blatantly ignored. Maybe if I had been in a better frame of mind, I'd have stopped; instead, I just sat there and idiotically begged for them to leave me here. At least when they were readjusting the equipment, the pain dulled slightly and was more manageable...

A loud popping sound, and the pressure was gone, which only caused an entirely new problem. My blood started to resume its regular flow in my lower extremities, making them throb with indescribable pain. It was all too much for me; the pain, the sounds, the fear… I finally just closed my eyes and knew that my reprieve was just a mere moments away, breathing one last phrase to a man who couldn't hear me before I finally fell into the abyss.

"I'm sorry."

* * *

**Edward**

The plane taxied down the runway at an unbearably slow pace. The LAX terminals were visible from my window, but they never seemed to get any closer as we wound through the maze and to the appropriate jetway.

Of course, it was likely due to the fact that I was so bloody tired, but I refused to sleep. Every second that passed, every mile that was crossed, made my stomach clench and knot with anxiety. I'd spent the entire flight being tortured by my incessant thoughts and fears. There was no feasible way I could rest knowing that something could have gone horribly wrong yesterday.

Fuck. Yesterday. I'd been completely out of contact with the world for over twelve hours. I'd used my connections and gotten on the first non-stop flight from Tokyo to LAX, for once not feeling the guilt that was associated with using my social status to push a regular passenger onto the next flight.

Nothing was more important than getting back home to LA.

I tried to convince myself that I was overreacting, and it hadn't been necessary to hop on a flight and come home, but the feeling in my gut told me how resolutely wrong that notion was. Alice was never wrong, and she had been genuinely frightened, which only intensified the feelings of foreboding and guilt that were slowly swelling inside me. I should've been here, should've tried to find a way so that Bella could come with me and still complete her assignments, not just settling on some weekend in New York with me just before the first leg of the tour ended.

Letting her out of my sight was the biggest mistake I'd ever made in my life.

I grew tired of waiting for the attendant to announce that we could turn on our mobile devices and pulled mine out of my pocket. I waited for it to load, and then watched as message after message… missed call after missed call… came pouring in. Alice, Jasper, my parents, Renée, and various press outlets all called repeatedly in the time I was gone. The severity of the situation weighed heavily on me, and I nearly drowned as everything came to a head inside me.

Bella was…

I cut that line of thought off as my breath hitched and started gathering my belongings. The possibility of Bella not existing wasn't even an option to me. I refused to entertain thought of the one thing that would cause my world to crash down around me, because without her, I'd cease to exist as well.

I pushed my way past the other passengers, mumbling apologies with my head ducked down and exited the plane. My feet carried me through the terminal and toward the doors with ease, even though my entire body was so deadened with exhaustion, I could barely see clearly. I was amazingly coherent enough to keep ringing every family member imaginable, although, not a single one answered my incessant phone calls, infuriating me. I was at a loss; I had no idea where I was supposed to go or what had even happened.

It was the most frightening feeling I'd ever known, to be this helpless.

I came out into the public area of the airport and was slammed into by the mob of press waiting for me. Talk of Bella and my marriage first caught my attention, but as I tried to worm my way through the crowd, other comments had my knees nearly buckling as they registered in my mind.

Accident.

"EDWARD!" My name was shouted from across the room, and I straightened up so that I could see where the person stood.

"Jazz," I breathed, pushing past the photographers and to where he and my sister were waiting for me.

The moment I was near, Alice grabbed my shirt and pulled me into a hug, unconcerned with the millions of people that would see the interaction later.

"Alice, cameras," I murmured, kissing her hair reverently. God, she was like salvation right now. Only one thing could surpass the comfort of my sister: Bella's smile.

"I don't care. Edward, she was in a car accident," she said softly.

I jerked back away from her as my worst nightmare slowly unraveled before me. "Alice," I croaked. "No."

"Shh. She's all right. Well, she will be. But she's pretty beat up. Emmett couldn't tell me everything; he was too upset, and I've not been to see her yet. We were waiting for you."

"Where?" I asked, hitching my bag further on my shoulder. "Where is she?" I demanded. The urge to see her suddenly consumed all rational thought.

"We'll take you," she said with a gentle smile. Tears filled her eyes, and she took my hand and began leading me to the door. "Come on."

I said nothing as we drove through LA and to the hospital. There was nothing to say, really, not until I knew what exactly had happened and how my wife was. And it wasn't as if I was in any condition to hold a conversation at the moment. All my focus was on keeping myself together so that I didn't fall apart before I even saw her.

Once we arrived, Alice and Jasper silently led me to Bella's room. We passed ICU suites, and Alice latched onto my hand again, knowing exactly what I needed at that precise moment in time. I squeezed her hand back gratefully, but paid attention to the scenery around me instead of what I was feeling. I had to keep reminding myself that I knew nothing about her condition and to not overreact, although, it did no good. Fear and anger and utter despair kept creeping up on me with each step I took.

We turned the corner and saw our families milling about the corridor. Each look in their eyes, the expressions on their faces and the redness of Charlie's eyes, tore at me, and I knew that whatever I was walking into would haunt me for the rest of my life.

Emmett wasn't around, but I knew it was for the best. I wasn't sure if I would handle seeing him well at the moment since the urge to find some random gun and shoot his kneecaps out was fairly strong. It wasn't as strong as the desire to destroy whoever it was that leaked our elopement to the press and caused this domino effect of events to take place in the first place, though.

I wouldn't rest until I knew who it was and made sure they paid for doing this to Bella.

I pushed the vindictive thoughts aside and took a deep breath before I walked into that room. They could be dealt with later… when Bella was no longer in need of a hospital.

Esme went to speak but stopped as I brushed past her. I couldn't talk just yet; I needed to see Bella with my own eyes, verify that she was really and truly still alive. Details of the crash and a conversation with her doctor could wait as well. I simply needed to touch her and hear the sound of her heart beating through the monitors.

I opened the door and found Renée sitting inside, cradling Riley to her chest as she spoke softly to Bella. The door clicked behind me, alerting her to my presence, but I never glanced away from the broken figure lying in that bed.

"Oh, God," I whispered, stopping in my tracks. She looked so frail that it took my breath away.

Bella was bruised and bloodied, barely recognizable. Swelling had taken over her beautiful face and bandages hid her hair from my sight. Her arm was plastered, lying uselessly across her chest. The blankets covering her body kept me from making any more observations, but I knew—just knew—that there was so much more wrong with her.

"They've got her in a coma," Renée said on a sob. "Medically induced, they said. For the swelling in her brain." She paused, quietly crying for a moment before she continued.

"They had to do surgery… on everything," she breathed. "I couldn't really keep up. Her right arm is broken, and the dashboard crushed her pelvis and caused some internal bleeding when it caved in on her. They don't- They don't know how she'll be affected long term…"

I held up my hands. I couldn't hear any more. Not yet.

She nodded and stood up, adjusting Riley in her arms. "I'll just be outside for a while."

I waited until she'd left the room before taking the first step toward her. A wave of emotion crashed into me, and I rushed to her side, falling into the chair that Renée had just occupied.

"Baby," I whispered, reaching to hold her hand. It was so tiny and warm in mine, and a broken moan suddenly escaped my throat. "I'm so sorry. I should have been here. I should have protected you. I- Just… don't leave me. Please," I begged, well aware of my rambling but too upset to find a way to stop. "I can't imagine a world without you… Don't make me."

I laid my head down on the bed next to her, still uttering absolute nonsense and mumbling words of "I love you" until I could no longer speak.

And only then, when I was too exhausted and beaten down to fight it any longer, did I cry the first tears since the day I buried my parents.

* * *

I wasn't sure how much time passed as I sat there next to Bella, drifting in and out of sleep. Nurses came in to check her vitals periodically, and her surgeon came in to check her progress at one point. I vaguely remembered hearing him speak technically about Bella's condition, about things of titanium rods and screws, hematomas, and possible scarring, but I couldn't seem to grasp any of what was said. Perhaps sheer exhaustion had finally caused my brain to stop functioning, but I only managed to understand one thing out of all that was said: Bella, however her injuries affected her, would never be the same again.

The implications of this had me sinking into a pit of despair. I wasn't entirely sure how I would be able to cope if she opened those beautiful eyes of hers and there wasn't a single flash of recognition. The thought of seeing her smile, hearing her laugh and sense of humor—all those things that made her so uniquely her—were the only things keeping me from going stark-raving mad while I waited for her to wake. The thought of them being lost to us forever was…

As if she knew what I was thinking, Alice came in to see Bella for the first time. She stared at her, rocking on her heels and struggling not to cry for a moment, until she finally said resolutely, "She's going to be all right, Edward."

"What if you're wrong?" I asked, clutching at Bella's hand. I couldn't seem to let it go. Even in my sleep I'd held on to her tightly.

"I'm not. I can see it. I've always known something would happen-"

"You what?" I demanded. "How could you not tell me?"

"I didn't know what it was," she explained. "I just knew that there was something the two of you needed to get through. This, obviously, is it."

I nodded and turned my attention to Bella, watching the rising and falling of her chest before speaking again. "You said you see it… what do you see?"

"Happiness," she said simply. "It saturates everything. I can't see anything else, except that the two of you are happy."

I nodded. It was more than sufficient. I merely had to keep my impatience under control. It would take Bella months to heal, and I intended to be right there through it all.

"You should go home and rest, brother," she said lightly. "We can take turns sitting with her until they force us all to leave."

I shook my head. "No. I'm not leaving her."

"Edward-"

I lifted my head and glared at her. "If it was Jasper in this bed, could you leave him?"

She opened her mouth and then closed it again, effectively chastised. She exhaled once, and then spoke. "All right. Can I get you anything from home, then?"

I suddenly realized how absolutely disgusting I felt from the long hours of travel without a shower. "A toothbrush, something to shower with and change into afterwards would be very appreciated right now."

She grinned. "Ok. I'll go get it all…"

"And feed Samson. I'm sure he's probably shit all over the house by now, but you haven't got to deal with that."

"No, I'll take care of everything, Edward." She paused for a moment. "Um, Mum wants to come in before visiting hours are over. Is it all right?"

"Of course. They shouldn't feel as though they can't come see her." I frowned. "I hadn't meant for them to-"

"Stop," she interrupted. "They wanted to give you time with her, that's all. I'll let them know."

"Thank you."

She walked over to Bella and placed a kiss on her forehead. "Hurry and heal, girl. We miss you," she whispered before spinning around and leaving the room.

I sighed and traced the lines of her palm with my index finger. "It's not even been twenty-four hours since I last heard your voice, and already I miss it so much. So listen to her. Hurry and heal so your doctor will bring you out of this…" I couldn't bear to say the word. "You're stubborn. I know you want to prove to everyone how strong you are," I said with a smirk.

Esme came in and smiled at me as she closed the door. "How's she doing?"

"The same. She's stable."

She sat in the chair next to me and offered me a sandwich from the cafeteria, which I thanked her for and set aside, only to have her scoop it right back up and practically force feed it to me.

"Mum, I'm not hungry," I said, shoving her hand away from my face.

"If Bella finds out that I let you sit here and not eat for days on end, she'll do bodily harm to me. I just got all that horrid plaster off my arm," she joked. "I'd rather not be incapacitated like that again, dear."

I chuckled and shook my head. "Thank you."

She cocked her head to the side curiously. "For what?"

"The laugh. I needed that."

She bent down and kissed my cheek. "That's what we're here for, Edward, to make sure you get through the waiting. You two can handle the rest on your own."

"You think so?"

She nodded. "Without a doubt."

The rest of our family slowly trickled in, each of them talking to me for a brief moment before leaving again. Charlie's presence was the hardest for me. He simply stood there and stared down on her with this… unfathomable expression on his face before he whispered something to himself, and then glanced over at me.

"I never expected this," he said gruffly. "Not in a million years."

"Neither did I," I replied.

"How are you holding up?"

"As well as expected."

He grunted. "Emmett's pretty banged up," he said, changing the subject.

"He's here?"

Charlie nodded. "They all are. It's not his fault, you know. You've been in here, oblivious to what's been happening outside, so you couldn't know, but they investigated the crash."

I sat up and waited for him to continue.

"The paparazzi were too close, but they didn't run him off the road," he explained, deciphering my angered expression perfectly. "The SUV wasn't completely on the road, but Emmett was still in control until the ground gave way under the weight of the SUV. It was just… an accident. A terrible, freak accident that I wish I could find someone to blame for. But it's either blame everyone, or blame no one."

I said nothing, too involved in processing his words to comment.

"James was there," he continued, causing my eyes to widen drastically. "He lives on Mulholland. He called for the ambulance. He talked with her while they waited for the paramedics to get to her."

"You're serious?" I asked, stunned.

"She could have died. She lost so much blood… I- I don't know if those photographer idiots would have bothered to call it in, or if they'd been too worried about getting a good shot of the crash to bother."

"I'm so sorry," I said, dragging my hand through my hair wildly. "I'll fix this, Charlie. I'll move her when she's ready and keep her out of this life. I-"

"There's nothing to fix. No one knew it would happen. If she hadn't gone to that party, she wouldn't have been so openly targeted. She would have been warned and could have stayed inside until you'd done some sort of damage control… or whatever it is you do."

I groaned, realizing I hadn't even bothered to contact Zafrina. "I haven't spoken to my publicist about all of this."

"It's been taken care of. She came by earlier, and your mom talked with her."

I blinked. "She what? Is she mad? Talking with random people when no one knows who she is to me? What would have happened in Zafrina had been a reporter? Their lives would never be the same."

"I don't think it matters to them anymore," he chuckled.

I cleared my throat; my brows knit with what I was about to say next. "Thank you for not being angry with me."

"Why would I be angry with you? For leaving her to do your job, like so many other people in this world have to?" He shook his head. "I've seen enough in my line of work to know that sometimes, things just happen for no good reason. "

"Yes, but-"

"Edward, you can't control everything. Thinking you're partially to blame for this would be like blaming yourself for a mudslide or earthquake happening while you're gone," he responded. "I have to go back home once she wakes up, so just promise me that you'll help her get through her recovery."

"Absolutely. As far as I'm concerned, that bloody movie I was promoting no longer exists," I said emphatically.

"Good, good." He shifted his weight and glanced at Bella one last time. "I'll let someone else see her now. Get some sleep, will you? You look like shit."

I chuckled under my breath. "I plan to take a shower and sleep out in the waiting area tonight. A nurse has already promised me a cot."

"Sounds comfortable," he muttered wryly.

I shrugged. "It's no matter. _She's_ all that matters to me, Charlie."

* * *

**EPIC A/N...**

** Before I forget, there's still a lot of stuff to explain/deal with, and Edward's mostly in shock this chapter. So if you've got a question, ask... just know if it's something I intend to get to soon, I may not answer :)**

**Length of the fic: Still a tentative 45 chapters. We'll see. I want to make sure everything flows and nothing is rushed. There are also 2 planned epi's.**

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**www(dot)fandomforpreemies(dot)blogspot(dot)com/p /how-to-help(dot)html**

**Also, I just got word that I'm scheduled for Smut Monday on Dec 20. I'm so fucking excited! Be sure to keep it in mind, because TMWCBM should be wrapped by then, and I won't be reminding you ;)**

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**Next update is in progress. Maybe next Weds? I have to work on another WYWG update too... but it will be very soon. My brain is all about this fic, at the moment.**


	40. Chapter 40

**Short and sweet... Thank you so much for all the reviews, the adds, and the recent rec'ing of this fic. I was blown away by the responses to last chapter.**

**Thanks to the amazing beta dude, Stratan, for getting this chapter beta'd in 18 mins. I lurve you.**

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* * *

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Chapter 40

**Edward**

I jerked awake at the loud sound of a doctor being paged over the intercom. The moment my eyes fluttered open, and I registered the white ceiling tiles above me, I realized exactly where I was; that everything that had happened in the last few days hadn't been some hideous nightmare, but my life.

I absolutely despised that slap back into reality. Escapism sounded sublime, leaving this realm and going into one where Bella was still happy and healthy. Yet I'd awoken with this very same start every morning since Bella's accident. It was like my brain couldn't shut off, too terrified that I'd hear those horrid "code blue" alarms going off inside the suite and open my eyes to see them all rushing to Bella's side, despite Alice's insistence that I was being absurd. When I finally did manage to sleep, it was only for a couple of hours at a time. Spending every second possible—awake—next to her was the only way I knew for certain that she was all right.

As I did every time, I bolted up out of the cot, throwing the blanket off me and raced toward the ICU suite where Bella was still lying. I opened the door and glanced up at the clock, nearly ramming my hand through the heavy wood as I noted the time.

"Who let me sleep all bloody day?" I demanded to no one in particular, growing angry as all these pent up feelings I'd worked so hard to bury finally started bubbling to the surface.

"You needed your rest," Carlisle said gently, coming out of Bella's room.

I pushed past him, into the dark room, and inhaled deeply as I heard the even beeps come from the heart monitor. I concentrated on the sound for a moment, letting it soothe me as I watched Bella's chest move as she breathed. It was the _only_ thing I could look at without having some kind of reaction. Every other part of her was so bruised and swollen… seemingly unhealed. She looked no different than when I first saw her, although, her doctor said that she was making progress by the way the jagged lines on the EEG read.

The guilt I felt over all of this was thick and sticky in my chest, slowly suffocating me. Just the thought of her lying here because of her relationship with me made me feel as though I couldn't breathe…

Jesus, this was so hard…

Carlisle cleared his throat, waiting for some kind of response from me.

"I'm fine," I finally snapped back.

He laughed dryly. "You're not. Stop fooling yourself."

I gave him a hard stare, and then quickly decided to turn my anger back inward. My family had been undeniably helpful throughout all of this. They'd kept me sane and dealt with everything outside the hospital for me so that I _could_ stay here with Bella. To start shouting at them would not only be irrational and wrong, but it would be pointless.

I needed to funnel my frustration elsewhere…

"Go home for a bit, Edward," he said calmly, as if he knew exactly what I was thinking. "Take the dog out for an afternoon run, clear you head. Come back when you're ready."

I opened my mouth to protest, but he cut me off.

"I'm not taking 'no' for an answer," he said sternly. "Get out of here before I find someone to throw you out. Look what you're doing to yourself. Do you really think she'd want this for you?"

I groaned and nodded. "I hate that you're right."

"I know. Go get some air," he said, throwing a set of keys at me. "We'll all be here while you're gone."

I took one last, furtive glance at Bella, nearly rooted to the spot, before forcing myself to leave the room.

The moment I stepped outside the hospital was when I realized how much I'd let slip past me in the last few days. There were so many questions unanswered, so many issues left unresolved. Paparazzi stood outside the doors, anxiously waiting for the moment I finally appeared, and quickly closed the gap between us as they all spotted me. They shouted their questions at me, clicked their cameras in my face. And for the very first time in my long career, I didn't bother hiding how much I hated their presence in my life.

"Get the fuck away from me," I said furiously. "Take your cameras and take pictures of someone else. Before I drag everyone involved in Bella's accident to court."

I was met with the expected antagonism. Some of the photographers wanted to get a rise out of me so that they had a story to go along with my comment. My comment was unusual, but not newsworthy. Having me so angered that I hauled off and shoved my fist down their throat? Now that was something that the magazines would fight over.

I found the black Mercedes Carlisle had rented for their stay here and tapped on the remote to unlock the doors. The photographers moved away from me, going to the other side of the aisle so that they could take their photographs without getting run down by an enraged actor, which did nothing to calm me down. What gave them the right to be so conscientious about their own safety, but not others? Not _Bella's_?

I grunted as I threw the car door open, determined not to think about it. There was a reason why I'd stayed in that hospital room for so long… avoidance of this, plain and simple. There were so many things to be dealt with at the moment… and I could feel it all slowly spiraling out of control. Adding the paparazzi on top of my emotions and the stress I was under was a little more than I could handle.

One photographer, Eric Yorkie, lingered, and I sighed heavily as a depressing thought skittered through my mind. No amount of yelling and fighting their presence in my life would do any good at all. I'd said it so many times before: it coincided with this life and my career. Just because I wanted no longer wanted to be a part of it, didn't mean they didn't have a right to do their so-called _job_.

"Not now," I said in defeat. "Just not now. That's all I ask of everyone. Give me space."

He nodded. "I'll tell them. I wasn't there… but I'm sorry. I can't imagine-"

"No, I suppose you couldn't," I shot back harshly. "Your job is to get the picture, no matter who gets hurt in the process."

I got in the car and slammed the door before he could say anything else. He stood there, gaping at me through the tinted window as I worked to calm myself. I was shaking, on the verge of a breakdown, so I laid my head on the steering wheel and closed my eyes until enough time had passed that I could drive down the PCH safely.

I left the hospital and stopped at the first pet store I ran across to pick up a few things for Samson that I was sure we were in need of. I hadn't reminded Bella to purchase them while I was gone and now…

I stopped that line of thought and pulled out my wallet when it was my turn at the register. I grudgingly let my eyes sweep over the numerous publications on the stands, feeling a jolt of shock as I saw the blue Range Rover turned over on its side at the base of a tree on the front of nearly every magazine.

"Fucking bunch of bastards," I cursed, grabbing a copy of every magazine off the shelves and tossing them at the cashier.

She gave me a sympathetic look and rang them up silently, only speaking to tell me the total of my purchases. I swiped my credit card, gathered up my items, and left, more determined than ever to do exactly as I'd told Charlie… Fix this.

My first stop was at Sam Uley's office. I wanted him to do some research to find out who it was exactly that had leaked our marriage to the press. I gave him Zafrina's number, explaining to him that things might be faster if they worked together. I needed answers, peace of mind, as soon as realistically possible. Then, I drove downtown and made my way to Zafrina's office with the stack of magazines in my hand. I waved the receptionist away and strode determinately through the building, opening Z's office door and letting it close loudly behind me.

Her eyes widened, and she quickly ended her call as soon as she saw me. "My God, Edward. Are you all right? You look… so…"

I laughed bitterly, reaching up and running my hand over the stubble on my jaw. The last time I'd looked in a mirror was in Japan. I had no idea how awful I looked, nor did I care.

"No, I'm not 'all right', Z. Not at all." I threw the magazines at her. "I want this gone. Now."

"Edward, they had a-"

I opened one of them, revealing the pictures of Bella being carried on a stretcher—"packaged" and on route to the hospital—before turning the page and showing her the pictures of the interior of the car. I hardened myself to what was on the page, blocking out any thoughts of what Bella must've gone through, and pointed out the close-up of the blood spatters on the broken window where Bella's head had been thrown against it. The airbags were deflated and hanging limply from the steering wheel and along the right side of the SUV, but they did nothing to_ save_ Bella from any damage. The dash still crushed her. The fender still collapsed on her.

"I don't want to hear that they were on public property and had the right to take photos of my wife lying unconscious in a demolished vehicle, bleeding out, while they gawked and got their money shots," I said fiercely. "I want it gone. I don't want anything affecting Bella when she wakes up. Call in the few favors we're owed… whatever. I won't be in the public eye anymore, so it won't make a difference if you have to cash all of them in. Just make it disappear… for a little while, at least," I amended when she went to speak again. "I need her to get well, Zafrina. I need her home."

She took a deep breath and nodded. "I'll see what I can do."

"That's all I ask." I straightened up and ran my hands through my hair. "Shred those?" I asked, feeling my stomach roll as the images played through my mind again. "I don't think I can look at them again."

She hurriedly gathered them up and threw them next to her feet so they were out of my sight. "Consider it done."

"Thank you. You'll be getting a call from a PI later… Sam Uley," I said as I walked back toward the door. "I want to know who leaked the wedding so close to our announcement."

"I knew you'd want to know, so I already started looking into it." She paused, glancing up at me warily.

"Just say it," I sighed. "Whatever it is you think I'm doing wrong, just say it."

"I don't think you're doing anything wrong," she countered. "But you're not doing anything to help yourself, either. You need a good night's sleep… a shave. Maybe even talk to someone about everything," she suggested.

I scoffed. "I don't need to talk to someone, Z. I need my wife to wake up."

"How many more days do they think she'll need?"

"They don't know. They don't know anything," I said in frustration. "They know she's stable and has injuries I can't begin to comprehend. But long term? They don't know. It's all I've heard, and I'm so tired… so tired of the waiting and the uncertainty. I don't know who she'll be when she wakes up, and I… I'm terrified that she won't be _my_ Bella anymore."

"I'm so sorry, Edward," she whispered. "Really, I am. I know it doesn't mean anything-"

"Yes, it does," I said with a sad smile. "It always means something."

* * *

I stepped into the kitchen and wiped the sweat off my brow after my run, brushing past Samson to reach for a bottle of water in the refrigerator. I hurriedly twisted the cap off of the bottle and tried to forget the feeling of being trapped on the sidewalk by the incessant photographers, but it was no use. Everything about being an actor had me feeling as if I was boxed into a corner. Whether it was journalists, paparazzi, or the morbid curiosity of the fans, I held the attention of millions... Everyone wanted to know how I was coping with what they deemed a "tragedy".

It was… maddening, at best. I merely wanted to be left alone, and my plea for space earlier had been insolently declined. News vans crept behind me, and paparazzi struggled to keep pace as I jogged down the sidewalk. Now I understood Bella's feeling of claustrophobia when the press got too close, the severe panic that rushed through her and incapacitated her. Had I not been so accustomed to their presence in my life, I might have found myself in a similar situation to what Bella had experienced on that first day alone: curled up on the bathroom floor, unable to function.

The house was silent and empty feeling—especially after hearing shouts for nearly an hour. The only sound was that of the dog's heavy pants, harshly reminding me of all the time I'd spent alone before I met Bella. I longed for Bella's laugh, her voice, and the sounds of whatever music she had playing while she studied; they were the sounds I'd heard nearly every day for the last two months and somehow, had me missing Bella even more.

I threw some ice cubes into Samson's water bowl and retreated to the bedroom to shower, and then possibly sift through all the mail that was sitting on my kitchen counter, although, I wasn't sure why. I couldn't focus, couldn't calm my worries. Running had simply tired me. For once, my head wasn't clear afterward, because there hadn't been a moment of peace the entire hour. I hadn't been given an opportunity to decompress, like I so desperately needed.

I stepped inside the room and just… froze. Everything was a reminder of our lives before. Pictures of our wedding day and honeymoon sat on the tables and hung on the walls, causing memories to flood through me and knock the air right out of my lungs. And there it was again, that heavy feeling of guilt that suffocated me. It was so hard to breathe through it all…

I went to the couch and cradled my head in my hands, wondering how it was that the perfection of my life managed to be destroyed in such a short amount of time. We were so bloody happy, on the brink of _truly_ starting a life together. And now… now Bella was broken in so many ways. I only had myself to blame for it. I'd selfishly brought her into this life, knowing that it wasn't what she wanted in the first place.

If I'd have just walked away…

But that was impossible now. I was bound to her in so many ways. Leaving her was no longer an option; it was never an option. The moment I gave myself to her was the moment I forfeited any say in my life whatsoever. The only way I could ever part from her was by a chance of fate… like the one that had nearly taken her from me just a few days ago.

I quickly got up, realizing how much of a mistake it had been to come back here. At least the hospital was a sterile, unfamiliar environment that I could sit in. Sitting here in the house where we'd spent so many nights together, escaping the world around us, was pure torture. My goal was the shower, but the moment I was near the door to the piano room, I jerked my keys out of my pocket, hastily unlocked the door, and threw it open.

I walked inside and stared at everything blankly for a second, only to be blinded by rage as I looked at the shrine to my career… the career that had managed to harm one of the very few people I held dear to me; the one person I'd ever fallen in love with.

It was the one last piece necessary to cause me to finally breakdown. It was inevitable; this sudden outburst of emotion, and all the ignoring I'd done of the situation had been utterly useless. It was absurd, but the only thing I could think of was to destroy this room in the way that Bella's life had been destroyed.

And so I did.

I ripped the framed pictures off the walls, relishing in the way they shattered as they hit the ground; I grabbed numerous awards off the shelves and just started throwing them across the room, uncaring of where they landed and what they demolished in their wake. I vaguely remembered hearing the dog barking with my odd behavior in the background, but it wasn't enough to stop me. I wouldn't be satisfied until it was all a pile of ruin at my feet.

I snatched one of the two Oscars I'd won and went to hurl it against the wall, needing to see the hole—the destruction—that would follow, but was stopped when two massive arms wrapped around me.

"Stop," Emmett said roughly, struggling to keep a hold of me. I could hear him hiss with pain as I fought against him, hitting the bruises that crossed his torso from the seatbelt. "Just stop it."

"Sod off, Emmett," I snarled, pushing one last time against his arms, and then abruptly giving up. It was as if all the fire and determination had been sucked right out of me.

"Fuck," I shouted, letting the award fall to the floor. "I don't know what to do. I'm just… I-"

He released me, and I immediately crumpled to the floor in a heap of shaking limbs. "Shit, Edward. Keep it together."

A dry laugh escaped my throat. "Because that's extremely easy to do at the moment."

I closed my eyes and let my head drop back against the wall. It took me a few moments to collect myself, but I managed.

"You've been avoiding me," I finally said. "Why are you here now?"

"Alice sent me."

"Ah." I exhaled sharply. "I don't blame you, you know."

"Well, that's good. I fucking blame myself enough for the both of us," he muttered lowly.

I opened an eye to look up at him, only to find him sprawled out in the middle of the mess on the floor. "You shouldn't. At all." I wasn't sure of what to say next, so I changed the subject. Any more elaboration would fall under the category of the pot calling the kettle black.

"I suppose I should thank my sister for sending you out. I'd have likely destroyed the entire house if you hadn't stopped me."

He grunted a laugh. "Yeah. That's kind of what she said when she pushed me out the door. She's a strong little shit."

I smiled. "She is. You don't ever go against Alice Cullen. That's one thing I learned the day Mum and Dad brought her home." I sighed and glanced around. I'd done what I'd set out to do; the room was a disaster. "I suppose I should clean this up."

"No, that's another part of my job description today," Emmett replied. "I'm your maid."

"What?" I asked, completely confused.

He propped himself up on his elbows and grinned slightly. My eyes fell on the white splint across his broken nose, and a pang of guilt shot through me for his injuries as well. I was a menace to everyone I let come near me. "You're needed at the hospital. They're weaning Bella off of the meds."

I nearly shot up off the floor with his words. "You're serious?"

The sincerity in his eyes was undeniable. "They start in an hour."

* * *

**Bella**

I awoke to blackness and a roaring in my head. An aching, relentless roaring that drowned everything else out. Thoughts skittered through my mind, but I couldn't latch onto any of them. I tried and tried to remember what had happened; why I was shrouded in darkness, and why I was slowly beginning to feel every ache in my broken body.

….

A flash of color filled my vision, and I suddenly remembered bits and pieces, mostly the things I'd have rather forgotten: the fear, the sirens, and the pain. But most of all, I remembered the blood. The scent of it, the feel of it running down my face, the rusty taste of it as it dripped onto my lips… And then without warning, I was pulled under again. It was like that for days; I drifted in and out of consciousness, uncertain of where I was or what exactly had happened. Each time I became more lucid, the darkness would suck me in again.

But I welcomed the darkness. Here, surrounded in black, there was no pain, no confusion. It was void of anything… its emptiness was oddly healing. Or so it seemed. Each time I started to surface, there was a new, bewildering ache; a new, agonizing pang as something inside me struggled to knit itself back together. To be conscious and fully aware would be torture right now.

And so I continued to float… until two words abruptly tumbled out of me and caused panic to well in my chest.

_Car wreck._

I could think of nothing but Edward and how much I needed him to be here. I knew someone would've called him, and could only imagine how terrified he'd been when he'd gotten the phone call, how worried he was sitting here in the hospital.

I shifted and groaned as pain racked my body. The roaring came back with a vengeance, but I could hear a gentle, smooth murmuring in my ear. My eyes fluttered open, and I blinked to focus on the dark silhouette standing before me.

Edward's anxious face finally came into focus, and I let out a hoarse sob at the sight of it. He looked… terrible. His face was covered in a copper-colored beard, and deep, dark shadows sat under his jade eyes. He was so pale and sickly looking, and his clothes were rumpled from days of wear.

It broke my heart to see him this way.

A tear fell down my cheek, but I tried to smile. I knew he was like this because of me. He'd tormented himself waiting for me to regain consciousness. "This is not how I pictured our little reunion going," I croaked sarcastically. "I pictured sex."

His face broke out into a cautious grin. Our eyes connected, finally showing me how thrilled he was at the sound of my voice. Had I known how little the doctors knew about my recovery and the extent of my injuries, I might've understood that elation a little better. I might have realized that it wasn't the sound of my voice that he was so thrilled to hear—though he was happy for that—it was the recognition behind it.

"So had I, but you had to go and cock it up," he responded.

"Mmm," I mumbled. "Cock. One of those many words that mean two completely different things to us."

A throat cleared in the background, and I groaned in embarrassment. Of course, my father would catch the suggestive banter with my husband. "Hi, Dad."

"Hey, Bells." I heard his footsteps as he came toward me, and soon, I was staring at his familiar, worried face. "How are you doing?"

"Embarrassed?" I replied. "Is that the answer you're looking for?"

He chuckled gruffly; the relief behind it was palpable. He rubbed the top of my foot carefully, and then backed away from the bed. "I'm going to uh… Yeah. I'll let everyone know you're awake and joking."

The door shut, and I immediately turned my attention back to the man sitting next to me.

"I missed you… so much," Edward murmured. His stopped and squeezed his eyes shut for a second, and I nearly started to cry again. There was nothing I could do to comfort him. "I thought I'd lost you… The doctors didn't know if you'd make it, or be the same, or…"

"I'm okay," I assured him.

"You're not. Don't pretend otherwise," he snapped. "You've no idea what is wrong with you. I have a list the length of my arm."

My eyes widened, but I said nothing.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "You can't know how hard it's been for all of us this last week and a half-"

"Wait, week and a half?" I shrieked, instantly regretting it. Pain streaked through my head and echoed throughout my entire body. A wave of nausea crashed over me with the extent of it, and I reached out and grabbed a basin in just enough time to heave into it, although, there was nothing in my stomach to expel.

Edward handed me a cup of water, gently tipping it to my lips with one hand while his other took the basin and sat it on the table.

"Ten days," he confirmed. "You did some damage to your head in the accident. They had you in a coma for a few days to help with the swelling. After that, you were heavily medicated so you didn't wake to any more pain than necessary."

"Oh, my God," I breathed. "I… I didn't think it was that bad. I remember hurting a lot, but…"

"It was a miracle you didn't pass out from a number of things. It, erm, it saved you. Being conscious… Talking to James. I can't ever repay him enough." He cleared his throat before saying, "The paramedics were able to assess your injuries much easier… faster."

I didn't remember James being there, but I chose to keep that to myself. For now.

He pressed the call button and gave me an anxious look. "How much are you hurting?"

"I'm not sure. I'm afraid to move."

He nodded and took a steadying breath. "Shall I list off your injuries now before I lose my nerve?"

"Later. I want to know what happened, exactly. I know I was in a wreck, but I can't remember… Was I drunk?" It was like there was this huge hole in my memory, one that was pretty fucking scary. Judging by Edward's reactions to everything so far—coupled with being unable to recall James at the scene of the accident—I wasn't sure what that meant… and it was freaking me out a little.

He chuckled. Seeing his smile was the most beautiful thing I'd ever witnessed, and as always, it comforted me instantly. "God, were you pissed. Do you remember our conversation?"

"No."

"Good. You'd be blushing right now, and as much as I'd love to see it, I don't think it's worth your discomfort." His demeanor abruptly changed. His face crumpled for a split second, and then smoothed out again, becoming blank as he put up his guard… as he acted for me. "The press found out about our wedding and were camped outside the party. They chased you-"

"Shh," I interrupted, tentatively reaching out to touch his face as his words triggered my memory. The coarse whiskers scraped against my fingers until he turned his head to kiss my hand. "We were in the hills," I said, letting the memories expand. "We crashed into a ravine."

James' face popped up in my mind, and I remembered him crawling over the glass and crouching beside me, talking to me as we waited for the paramedics to arrive. I couldn't recount everything that was said, but I knew he was there. And that was enough to calm my fears.

"Yes," he breathed.

"How is everyone else?"

"Worried, much like me. Angela and Rosalie had mild concussions; Emmett has a broken nose from the airbag's deployment. The seatbelt did some damage to his lungs, but he's fine. They're all fine. You… you're… another story."

The doors suddenly flew open, and Esme came bursting into the room. "You're awake," Esme said tearfully. "Thank God."

"Hi," I replied, watching her rush across the room and push Edward out of the way.

"You've no idea how worried we were about you." She ran her hand through the ends of my hair. "You… you frightened me. I-"

"Mum," Edward cut her off exasperatedly. "Stop it. I realize you're excited, but you're going to hurt her."

She looked offended. "For God's sake, Edward, I will not."

"Mum," he said pointedly. "Give her some space. She's a bit disoriented still."

Esme pursed her lips unhappily. She glanced over at me, and her chin started trembling. "Very well, then."

"No, no," I said, feeling awful. "She can stay. It's okay. I'm surprised Renée hasn't barged in her yet."

"She's not here. She had to run Riley to his pediatrician for a weigh in. She'll be back in a bit, and then I'm sure you won't be able to get her out of here." Esme's face softened a little. "She's been here every day, Bella."

"She has?" I rasped.

"Every day." She bent down to kiss my forehead gently. "Take that as you will, darling."

A nurse came bustling in, her face lighting up as soon as she saw that I was awake. "You're up! Everyone will be so happy to hear that!"

"Yeah," I mumbled.

"How are you feeling? Do you need something for the pain?"

"No, I-"

"She moved earlier and vomited," Edward replied, ignoring me. "Don't let her fool you."

I narrowed my eyes. "You dick," I hissed.

He shrugged unrepentantly.

"Here, sweetie." She reached for a chord lying beside me. "Press this button here when you're hurting. It's regulated, so you won't give yourself too much."

She pressed the button, allowing the medication to drip into my IV line, and then started checking my vitals. Since one arm was plastered, Edward and Esme had to move aside so that she could put the blood pressure cuff on my unbroken arm. Every slight shift of movement she caused me had me cringing. It felt like I was being stuck with a thousand needles… everywhere. I couldn't pinpoint where exactly I was hurt and where I wasn't.

Until she lifted my gown.

Hundreds of staples and sutures littered my stomach, and I gaped, stunned silent, at how monstrous it all looked. I heard Edward's groan—followed by Esme's quiet gasp—from across the room, but I was too busy staring at the bloodied lines that streaked haphazardly over my stomach to pay them any attention, the purplish bruises that slowly faded to an odd shade of green that surrounded them.

I wanted to shout "Holy fuck" but clenched my jaw instead. I wasn't sure the words would come out in anything but a garbled mess with the massive lump that had formed in my throat.

Satisfied with what she saw, the nurse lowered the garment and pulled the covers back up. "The doctor will be in shortly. Your families are in the hall. I can start sending them in one at a time whenever you're ready."

"Not yet," I managed as tears filled my eyes. "Just… I'll let you know."

"Okay."

Esme left with the nurse, telling me that she'd let Edward monopolize me a little while longer before she came back and pushed him out so everyone else could speak to me as well. She was making light of the situation, but I think she knew that I needed some time to process everything. I was still so disoriented… and waking to injury upon injury was doing nothing to help clear my head.

As soon as the door shut behind them, Edward was back at my side. He saw my tears and reached out to stroke my cheek. "It's all right."

I wanted to shake my head, but decided against it. The last thing I needed was for my body to try to puke everywhere with the movement again. "No, it's not. I'm… I look like fucking Frankenstein's monster."

"No," he said firmly. "You look beautiful."

I scoffed.

"All this will go away, but it's not what's important. You're alive, baby, when I could have lost you."

"What… what is all this? What did they have to do to me?" I asked, sniffling.

He fell back into the chair and took my hand, staring at our hands as he spoke. "There was a brain bleed. They had to remove the hematoma and suture the large wound in your scalp from when your head hit the window."

I instinctively pulled my hand away from his to reach up and feel at the bandages.

"It extends from here," he pointed to the area just above my temple, "to here." He then pointed to my eyebrow.

I blinked, causing a tear to fall. "What else?"

He gritted his teeth together before continuing. "You had internal bleeding. That's what all those tiny scars are for. They used a laparoscope to stop the bleeding and repair your organs while the orthopedic surgeon put a rod in your arm and rebuilt your pelvis."

"Rebuilt my pelvis?" I asked blankly. "What does that mean?"

"The dashboard caved in on you. It shattered your pelvis."

"Is that…?" I swallowed and started to feel heavy with the medication. Or exhaustion. With everything I apparently had wrong with me, it was up for debate. "Is that all?"

"Isn't that enough?" he bit back.

"That's not what I meant," I mumbled sleepily.

"I know. I'm sorry. I'm not handling this like I should." He scooted the chair closer to me and ran a finger along my jaw line, instantly relaxing me. "Go to sleep. You need your rest."

"You'll be here when I wake up?" I asked, struggling to stay awake long enough to finish the conversation.

"I'm going nowhere," he promised, kissing the finger where my ring once sat. "Not ever again."

"Kay…" I trailed off, nearly falling asleep before I realized that said finger was bare. "Where are my rings?"

"In my pocket. In the same place they've been since the nurse handed them to me."

"Kay," I repeated. "Put them on me?"

"When you wake."

I moaned something unintelligible in protest, making him laugh.

"Sleep. I want you to be coherent when I put them on you again."

I was too tired to argue any more, but I did it anyway. "Please, baby?"

He sighed and fished the rings out of his pocket; I grinned in triumph.

"You're unbelievable," he said lowly, grinning crookedly. "You've been awake for not even half an hour, and you're already making demands. What am I to do with you?"

"I'd tell you what you could do with me, but that's a little impossible at the moment."

He rolled his eyes and slipped the rings on my finger, one at a time. "'Satisfied?"

"Extremely," I mumbled. "Now put your ring on before I pass out on you."

He held up his hand and arched his brow wickedly. "Already done."

"Sneaky."

"It's not sneaky if you're unconscious," he teased.

"Oh, add funny to the list," I joked, closing my eyes. "Let me sleep before I call the nurse in here and kick you out."

He laughed and pressed a kiss to my hair. "I love you, you know that?"

"Mmm. I love you, too."

* * *

**Ok, so I know I said the fic would be 45 chps, but I've got about 1900 words written on ch 41 already, and I'm thinking the last chapter will be ch 43... then there'll be the 2 epi's afterwards. So, yeah, 45 chapters TOTAL... but um, don't take my word for it. I'm kinda flying by the seat of my pants here, ya know? Stupid characters deviating from the outline... You are aware this was supposed to end 5 chapters ago, yes? Lol**

**Oh, I almost forgot! I signed up for Squeeze My Lemon! My post date is on Dec 1, and I will be doing an outtake from TMWCBM thanks to this awesome dirty pic prompt I picked out... I'm excited about it! There are a couple of entries posted already and more to come. A lot of great authors (myself excluded) have signed up :)**

**http:/ www (dot)fanfiction(dot) net/u /2258597 /dirtycheekymonkeys  
**


	41. Chapter 41

**Thank you for the reviews, adds, pimps, and whatever you all did this last week. Without sounding ridiculous, I love you all SFM :)**

**Thanks to Stratan for the beta work!**

**And please do not shoot the writer. I promised HEA w/babies, and there is going to be HEA w/babies. If you can't stand not knowing what the future holds, I suggest you go donate to the March of Dimes and get the Fandom for Preemies outtake I submitted. JS. **

**www (dot)fandomforpreemies (dot)blogspot (dot)com**

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* * *

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Chapter 41

**Bella**

The first few days after I'd regained consciousness were a blur. I spent the majority of the time too doped up to really comprehend anything going on around me, pressing that little button the second I started to feel the slightest twinge. Family members sat with me, listening to my idiotic ramblings; Emmett, Rosalie, and Angela came in to see me. That was the hardest; to see the bruises scattered all over their bodies, the splint on Emmett's nose, and know that they were there because of me… because of Edward.

Things with Emmett were awkward, from what I could remember. I would spend most of my time either sleeping or saying something unintelligible to try to calm everyone's worries, and he would sit in the corner and stare at me with this… indecipherable expression. And then he'd leave without a word spoken to anyone—especially me.

It was a little disheartening to have someone I'd let myself trust and get so close to pull away like he did, but I couldn't blame him. It was a kind of coping mechanism, one that I'd found myself doing for most of my life.

Our family slowly trickled away, leaving Edward and me here alone for the responsibilities they still had back home. Charlie was the first to go, flying back to Forks to spend his days calling me in between cases and shifts patrolling the town. Carlisle and Esme left soon afterward, with a regretful, tearful goodbye. Jasper then left for Texas, leaving Alice here with us for a few days longer before she too would have to go.

Emmett, Rosalie, and Angela all tried to visit every day, but eventually, with finals and graduation on the horizon, it weaned to a visit every few days… and I was honestly fine with that. I was a little tired of everyone fucking hovering over me like I'd fall apart at any given second. With the amount of titanium I'd learned I had in my body, there was no way that was likely to happen any time soon.

True to Esme's word, Renée was at the hospital constantly, sitting with me and watching mindless soap operas when there was nothing else to do while Riley slept in her arms. She did her best to keep positivity up, and even snuck in a few little herbal remedies and whatever else she'd been told would help me heal faster. And every night, as much as I thought it was a wasted, bullshit effort, Edward and I did as we were instructed, just to make Renée happy. This was her way of feeling useful to me, and with everything we'd been through, there was no way I'd make her feel like shit over something so stupid.

Not now. Not after having everything put into perspective recently.

And I was okay. I was staying positive and focusing on getting better, for myself and for Edward. And then it was as if it all suddenly shifted for me, and I found myself falling into this… state of hopelessness, thanks to one consultation with one of the many doctors who came in and out of the hospital room I was eventually moved to.

Dr. Victoria Fowler… God, how I hated that name. She strode right into the room, pulled up a seat, and smiled warmly at me as she introduced herself. Without so much as another word—a segue of any kind—she placed the huge manila envelope she'd brought with her at my feet and squared her shoulders, scaring the absolute shit out of me.

"I think I'm going to be sick," I mumbled to Edward.

"Wait until you hear what she has to say," he answered calmly. Only his eyes gave away his concern. "You might be overreacting."

I shot him a look—as much as I could, considering I still couldn't move all that much. "Seriously?"

She stretched out her arm over my body to shake my free hand. "How are you today, Bella?"

I swallowed hard as my palms went damp. "Same as always," I squeaked.

She glanced over at Edward and smiled, pushing a lock of her fire-red hair back behind her ear. "And Edward? How are you?" Her blue eyes twinkled a little with excitement. "I'm a big fan. Unprofessional of me, I know, but it's true."

He chuckled awkwardly. "Thank you."

She cleared her throat, immediately dropping the fangirl act. "So I'm sure you two are wondering what I'm doing here."

"Yes, actually," he said, glancing down at her nametag. I did the same and nearly gasped.

_OB/GYN._

She smiled again. I had half a mind to knock the smile off her face if she didn't stop bullshitting around soon. "I was actually brought in on a consult after getting some of Bella's test results back. Her most recent scan, to be specific."

"Bad news. It's bad, bad news," I breathed, knowing that something awful was about to come of this.

"Well…" She trailed off; her hand darted over to the envelope. "Everything looks to be healing nicely. We just have one issue," she said, pulling the film from the envelope. "And please keep in mind that no one could have anticipated this."

I just stared back at her, silently willing her to hurry it up.

She got the hint. "When you went in for surgery, the surgeons weren't exactly sure what they would find when they opened you up. You had a lot of damage from the bone fragments and a lot of bruising from the weight of the SUV sitting on you for so long. They corrected all the problems and stopped all the bleeds, but that doesn't always mean that everything will heal as it should. Sometimes, in a trauma, the body heals improperly. Sometimes, certain people have more scarring than others. You fall into the second category, Bella."

"Oh, God," Edward moaned under his breath.

"We can't have kids," I said numbly as it all came together. The shattered pelvis, the scarring, the fact that an obstetrician was speaking with us… "I can't have a baby now."

She gave us a solemn nod. "I'm so sorry."

"How, exactly?" Edward asked, pushing whatever he was feeling aside to get all the facts. At least one of us was useful. I just sat here completely… dumbfounded by it all.

She went into the mechanics of it. How it happened, what we had to look forward to. Each word was like a knife being shoved into my chest, and I eventually had to stop listening so that I didn't go into hysterics while she was busy talking about fertilized eggs being unable to implant, my pelvis being fused together, and scarring making it virtually impossible for me to carry a baby to term, if the miracle of implantation did happen to occur.

Then, she dove into our options. Words like adoption and surrogacy were thrown around, but I let Edward handle all of that. I wasn't interested in feeling like a failure, of wishing I'd have given Edward what he wanted those few months ago instead of waiting. If I hadn't waited, I wouldn't have gone to that party. I'd probably be sitting at home with my husband, instead of lying in this hospital bed, picking out baby names and color schemes for the nursery. I'd be healthy; I'd be alight with bliss.

She gave us a card and her condolences, and then walked out of the room, most likely to ruin some other couple's life. I just held the card in between my fingers, staring at the tiny black script, waiting—just waiting—to fall apart.

And then I finally did.

The door clicked behind her, echoing throughout the silent room… sealing our fate. I sucked in a breath, fighting to stay as calm as I could so I didn't burst into tears and cause any damage to what had already started to mend, but it was no use. I could only hold it all in for so long… Sooner, rather than later, the dam would break.

My chin trembled as I glanced over at Edward in shock. "Baby, she… Did she…?"

He didn't answer; he didn't move. He continued to stare stoically at me as my entire body began to shake uncontrollably with what I could only describe as loss. God, it fucking hurt. Everything fucking hurt. My wounds, my heart, my head…

"Edward?" I choked out.

His mouth contorted miserably, and sorrow flashed in those bright green eyes of his, telling me everything.

"No," I wailed. "No, no, no." I shook my head, ignoring the sharp streak of pain it shot through me. "Edward, no."

He moved closer to carefully take my face in his hands and kissed the tip of my nose. "Shh," he whispered. "Don't get so upset you cause a setback."

"I want it, Edward. I want it," I said over and over again. "I want it back."

Grief consumed me. It was irrational, incomprehensible.

But it was mine.

"I know," he said, taking in a shuddering breath. "God, how I know. It just wasn't meant to be."

The truth of his statement cut right through me, and I started crying uncontrollably, all while Edward held onto me helplessly until I purged myself over the despair that I felt over a losing a baby that had never even existed in the first place.

Someone came into the room, a nurse, I assumed from what Edward said next. "We've just got some bad news. I think she might need-"

"I'll be right back with something to help her sleep."

"I'm sorry," I said through my sobs. "I'm so sorry."

"Don't be sorry. You've nothing to be sorry for, love." He paused for a few seconds before continuing. "We have other options. It's not as if we can't have what we've been planning."

"How can you be so calm about this? This is what you wanted… and now, I can't gi-"

"Stop it," he said firmly. "I want you. I want us, a baby with you, in whatever capacity that may be. This changes nothing."

"It changes everything. It's not the same," I whimpered.

"It's not the same, no. It won't be as easy. But it'll be better, Bella. It'll be ours."

* * *

**Edward**

I leaned against the sink in the loo adjoining Bella's room and closed my eyes. Watching her fall apart like that had undeniably been the most gut-wrenching experience of my life. Her sobs hadn't stopped until the nurse had come back and injected her with some sort of sedative. But even asleep, she still looked so defeated.

It was all so unfair… She was so undeserving of all of this. Bella was inherently good, kind, funny; she was the most beautiful soul I'd ever known. And for her to have to be put through all of this was…

I took a deep breath to focus, and as ridiculous as it seemed, center myself. I'd let Renée teach me breathing exercises in long hours we sat in here alone, waiting for Bella to wake. She was solid, for lack of a better word. Resolute. Things might've not been perfect between she and Bella, but they were improving. Renée, for all her idiocy and flighty tendencies, could not be bent on this one thing. She lived here with me, with the baby. Nothing, no amount of arguing with Charlie or persuasion from Phil, could convince her to leave.

Unsurprisingly, the breathing exercises didn't work. They never worked. I always just ended up feeling like a complete git doing them. I pushed off the sink in frustration and glanced at my reflection in the mirror. I looked awful, beaten and worn down. And no matter how burdened we all felt, there was one thoroughly discouraging fact we still faced: it all would just get worse before it could get any better. Bella still needed to finish healing. She needed to start therapy, which we'd been warned would be sometimes excruciating for her.

Then, there were the emotional aspects of it, the ones that kept me awake at night wondering how we could ever go back to the way we were before. I wanted to believe that we'd be stronger—closer—from all of this, but there was a part of me that couldn't help but think we were destined to fail. We were from completely different worlds, and Bella had spent so long trying to mold herself to mine.

And so I decided to do the same for her. Work was just that… work. It wasn't making me happy like it used to. That was reserved for Bella now. With the exception of that one last film I'd so daftly let Alice and Bella convince me to do, I would no longer have anything to do with the film industry. No more traveling, no more interviews or photo shoots… Nothing. I'd made the decision before, but it hadn't been this definitive. It had been out of misery. Now that my head was clearer, I knew I could never go back.

It felt slightly freeing to not have that responsibility weighing me down any longer. I just needed to speak to Zafrina about it, come up with that one generic statement that she could tell anyone who called.

Regardless of what that doctor had said, the life I'd always envisioned for us was still there, still thriving. It was just different now, and as I'd said before,_ better_. We could adopt. We could give a child a home, just like my parents had done for Alice, like they had done for me. I could do something more than just donate to various orphanages. Bringing a baby into our home this way would be more meaningful to me because the process had changed my life irrevocably the day I was adopted, and then again with Alice's adoption.

I merely needed to convince Bella of all this.

"Fuck," I muttered as a knock sounded on the door. Alice was early.

"I'm here," she said through the door. "You can go now."

_So I gathered._

I turned around and opened the door to find Rosalie standing with her, staring back at Bella worriedly.

"She's asleep…" Rosalie trailed off questioningly.

Alice simply pressed her lips together and let out a sound that was laced with emotion. With that one sound, I knew why she'd stayed behind, why she'd let Jasper leave without her. She knew, all along, that this was a possibility.

"Alice…" I breathed, not really wanting to talk about it. To say the words, to think about Bella's reaction any more than necessary…

But thankfully, there was no need; she let the issue drop. She just shook her head, and then went to sit with Bella.

"What the hell is going on?" Rosalie asked slowly as she glanced between us.

"It's," I took a deep breath and put my hand to my chest, trying to unconsciously rub the ache away, "not good. _She's _not good. We had a visit from an obstetrician earlier."

Her eyes closed tightly. "Oh… Shit. I don't even want to know what that means."

"Good call," I said dryly, "though, I think you get the picture."

"Are you okay?"

I shook my head. "Not really. If I have to see her go through one more thing because of me… I'll-" I broke off, not really knowing how to finish the sentence. "How's Emmett?" I asked instead.

"Still beating himself up. I can't convince him that he's not to blame. No one is." She opened her eyes to give me a sharp look, causing me to chuckle a little.

"Point taken, Rosalie."

Her eyes narrowed. "Is it? Is it really? Every time I come in here, you're brooding in the corner or some shit. It's hard… God damn it, it's hard to sit here and watch her have to go through all of this, but you have to stop blaming yourself. It was an _accident_."

I nodded once. "I know. I'm trying."

She glowered at me. "Try harder."

I held up my hands in defeat. "Work some of that Hale magic on Emmett, will you?"

A small smile played at her lips. "You got off easy. You're not _my _husband."

"Well, thank heavens for that, then," I joked.

She went to push me, but I dodged her hands and laughed. If there was one thing positive in the midst of all this sadness, it was that Rosalie Hale and I had finally gotten past the awkward best-friend-keeps-a-wary-eye-out-on-new-boyfriend-slash-husband phase and accepted me as one of the few people that Bella would always be able to rely on.

"Get out of here. Alice says you have things to take care of."

I hesitated, glancing back at where Bella slept. "Should I wake her before I...?"

"Let her sleep. We'll tell her where you're going."

I never moved my eyes from Bella. "Right."

"You're going to wake her up, aren't you?" she sighed.

I didn't bother trying to deny it. Of course I was.

I walked over to the bed and ran my hand over Bella's face. It took her a little while to stir, but she finally opened her eyes and smiled groggily at me.

"I have a few things to take care of. Alice and Rosalie will sit with you while I'm away."

"S'okay," she slurred. "I can sleep by myself."

"I'd much rather you didn't. Not yet."

She went to roll her eyes, but they ended up closing again. "Fine. So overprotective."

"Can you blame me?" I chuckled.

"No. S'pose not."

I made sure to tell her that I loved her—because I could never seem to say it enough now—before I started toward the door.

"Edward?" Alice called after me, stopping me just as I reached the door.

I turned to face her.

"Don't do anything. Let them handle it."

I clenched my jaw furiously and glanced away.

"Let. Them. Handle it," she repeated sternly. "Believe me, they'll do a much better job than you could ever think of."

I growled something back and threw open the door, not bothering to hear any more. There was one thing I could do for Bella—one thing to maybe make things easier for her—and Alice was telling me to let it go.

The bloody hell I would.

* * *

I shifted on my feet impatiently as I waited for someone to open the door at the Newton household. I held the "smoking gun" against Jane in my hands and stared into the thick, swirling glass as someone came toward me.

Mike.

"Edward," he said, blinking in surprise. "I thought you…"

"Is your sister around?" I asked, feigning nonchalance. But inside, I was boiling. To be this close to the person who leaked our marriage (thus causing Bella to be in a car accident) had me so furious, it was all I could do not to break down the door and barge inside.

But my retirement hadn't been publicized yet. I had to keep in mind how that would look to everyone on the outside, as much as it killed me to. I'd nearly gotten myself in trouble when it came to dealing with Tyler; I couldn't afford to lose my temper like that again. Not now. Not with my every action under such scrutiny at the moment.

He nodded. "She's out back. Is that some of her stuff? I thought she got it all from Bella," he said, reaching out for the envelope.

I snatched it back, away from his reach. "I'd prefer to give it to her myself, if you don't mind."

His head tilted to the side in confusion. "Um, okay."

I followed Mike through the house and to the garden where Jane sat with whom I assumed were her parents. She started to sneer something at Mike, but the words caught in her throat the moment she saw me.

"How's Bella doing, anyway, man?" he asked.

My eyes flicked over to him in annoyance. "Fine," I answered shortly.

She blanched and looked away, and I couldn't help but feel a bit smug at her reaction, justified, even.

I politely introduced myself to their flabbergasted parents and sat at the wrought iron table next to Jane. The sound of the chair scraping across the concrete alerted me to her movement. I grasped her arm and gave her an intimidating look, stopping her instantly.

I've no idea how long I spent chatting up her parents, but eventually, I grew tired of the act and asked if I could speak to Jane alone. Between the weeks Jane had been tutored by Bella and my seemingly genuine demeanor, they granted my request without question.

Once they were all inside, I turned to Jane and stared at her evenly, enjoying the squirming she was doing as I did. My finger tapped on the envelope ominously; her eyes darted from me to the envelope nervously.

"I'm curious," I began. "What exactly did you receive by doing this?"

I watched that uncaring façade of hers fall into place as she shrugged. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Ah, now, that's bollocks," I answered calmly. "The proof is right here. You weren't all that smart about this."

She just sat there.

I carefully pulled out the phone records that Sam had gotten for me. "This is your mobile here, is it not?" I asked, pointing to the highlighted number on the page.

"And furthermore," I continued without waiting for an answer, "this is your name attached to the mobile number in question… You know, if you really wanted to get away with this, you could have done so anonymously. There are numerous ways to go about it."

She stiffened and glared at me. "Maybe I didn't want to get away with it. Maybe I wanted Bella to know who'd told the paparazzi. Stupid bitch," she mumbled under her breath.

I sat there for a moment, staring back at the house so that I didn't throttle her and find myself sitting in a jail cell. "My wife… That stupid bitch," I seethed, "is lying in a hospital because of you. You've caused more damage to her than you could ever possibly know."

"Whatever." She waved me off. "She got in a car wreck. Big fucking deal. She'll get over it."

"Yes, she will," I responded vehemently. "But she will no longer walk the same. She will be in pain for the rest of her life. And if that wasn't enough, your selfish, inconsiderate reasons for leaking our marriage to the press has made it so she can never have children."

"Then adopt."

I stood up, nearly vibrating with anger. "You -" A figure in the background caught my eye, and I immediately cut myself off.

Aro Cruz was standing just outside the gate leading to the front of the house, watching us closely.

"Edward," he greeted as he came over to us. "To what do we owe this pleasure?"

_Let them handle it._ Alice's words flashed through my mind, and I started gathering up the evidence, unwilling to give in to the words so easily. I could seek my revenge later, whatever it was. I was still unclear about it myself. I only knew that I wanted to make Jane suffer like she was making Bella suffer now.

"I just had a few things to discuss with Jane since Bella's not able at the moment," I lied.

He grabbed the most damning of the evidence out of my hand and studied it.

"Damn," I muttered.

"I see," he said flatly.

"Uncle Aro," Jane said hurriedly. "I can explain…"

She wisely stopped speaking when Aro glanced back at her. The look of rage on his face was enough to make _me_ almost cower.

"Give me the envelope, Edward."

"No, I don't believe I will. It's not your issue."

"Not my issue." His lips twisted wryly. "I think it is my issue. My niece has managed to do something to not only harm someone I was actually rather fond of… My apologies, by the way…"

I nodded my acceptance.

"But she's also shamed our family one last time."

God, this was all so odd. I suddenly felt like I was in some mob drama. "Erm, all right," I replied uncertainly.

He reached for the envelope, which I dazedly handed to him, and then turned to Jane. The sadistic smile on his face caused a shiver to creep up my spine.

"I'll fix this, Edward. You can go."

I bristled at the dismissal. "Pardon me? You expect me to just walk away? After all she's done?"

"Yes," he said, never looking away from Jane. "Believe me when I tell you, I didn't make it to where I am today by being _nice_."

Judging by the tone of his voice, I didn't think I wanted to know what that meant. I spared one last glance at Jane and noted the look of panic, mixed with that of absolute terror, and surrendered.

Alice was always right.

I didn't bother saying anything else, just walked back to where I'd parked my car on the street and headed directly to the hospital.

I opened the door quietly so that I didn't wake Bella, only to hear Alice's voice as she spoke to Bella. I stood there and listened, more thankful for my sister than ever before. Her words, her story, would be more convincing—more comforting—than anything I could tell Bella myself.

"Did Edward ever tell you about my life before Carlisle and Esme adopted me?"

"No," Bella replied.

"Well, I was older than the other children at the orphanage. I was quiet and so very shy. I know that seems impossible to believe now," she said with a teasing smile, "but it's true. I was broken, Bella. And Carlisle and Esme gave me hope… life. They gave my brother his life back after my aunt and uncle died as well."

"They're amazing people, Alice," Bella agreed.

"They are… I thought no one wanted me. Everyone went after the babies, and when they did meet with me, I froze with fear and ran away from every single perspective set of parents to hide in a large, cedar trunk in one of the main rooms. The dark was my comfort, as strange as it sounds, but it had always been that way.

"My biological parents were abusive. They liked to take their anger out on their little, defenseless daughter and 'forget' to feed her for days. They got pissed; they got high… They…" She shuddered, and I nearly leapt across the room to comfort her.

"And so I hid. I hid in the closet under the stairs, where it was dark… all the time. When they found my hiding spot, my punishment was more severe than I'd imagined possible. They were tired of me misbehaving and said I needed to learn my lesson. But really, they were tired of _me_," she said angrily. "They no longer wanted the responsibility of a child and left me to rot in that disgusting flat of theirs. Packed up and left me in the middle of the night without a word."

Bella gasped, wincing slightly as her body shifted. "I'm so sorry," she whispered.

"What for? I was found by the landlord and given to Children's Services. I was better off without them, even alone and terrified in foster care." She inhaled deeply. "Bella, I was never frightened of Carlisle and Esme. Not once. They were the first people I ever let touch me. They were the first couple that I didn't run away from."

Bella lay there, chewing on her lip as she absorbed it all. "What are you getting at?" she finally asked.

"I'm saying that you and Edward have the opportunity to do that now. Whether it's with a baby or a child, you have the means to give them the life they might not have otherwise. Just… think about it. I'm not saying your feelings aren't valid; I would feel exactly the same in your position. I'm just telling you that it's not all lost. You can still have a family."

* * *

**Bella**

Minutes bled into hours, hours into days, days into weeks—months… Time ceased to exist for any purpose other than to taunt me with its increasingly slow passing… I went through the motions, did the expected. But it wasn't for me anymore. It was for everyone else. Seeing their smiles when I progressed was the only thing that kept me afloat.

I just didn't care… or maybe that wasn't exactly the right term for it. I was apathetic, yes, but it was more than that. It was an inexplicable, gradual change in me. Everything pissed me off, caused me to cry. It was pent up anger that had managed to creep up on me, overwhelming me.

Edward didn't leave my side once, ignoring everything outside and focusing only on me. He hired someone to care for the dog; he disregarded the rest of the press tour and his obligations. He was so adamant that he missed nothing, that he saw me through every therapy session and doctor's exam. He held my hand when I was crying from the pain, and he laughed when I took my first, wobbly step alone after so many weeks of frustration and weakness. He celebrated his thirty-ninth birthday with a pathetic, molten chocolate cake and a lone candle that I'd had one of the nurses find for me. No gift, no big celebration he deserved. Just me, in an old, ratty t-shirt of his, singing 'Happy Birthday' to him.

I wanted to say that I was appreciative of how willing he was to be there for me, but I couldn't. I mean, I was, but it was overshadowed by the anger… the resentment. Each special occasion that passed us by just fed the resentment that slowly built inside me… I missed so much, lying in a hospital bed. Graduation passed me by; the premiere for _Rogue_ came and went; Riley seemed to get bigger every time my mom brought him for a visit, yet I couldn't bring myself to hold him. He was the personification of what I was denied… It was one thing for me to be so stymied, but for it to affect everyone else around me as well?

Unacceptable.

My life was at a standstill. There were no happy memories to be made, at least not ones I wanted. I didn't want to look back and remember all the days I spent trapped inside the walls of the hospital while the rest of the world continued, _existed_ without me.

And so the resentment grew, gradually becoming so large that a barrier was now standing between me and everyone else. I was slowly shutting them all out, desperate to feel some kind of normality again and unwilling to bring them all down with me while I was still so helpless.

My prognosis was good, given the circumstances. My memory was a little off-kilter now… I tended to forget things easily, and I quickly learned that I needed to write down every appointment, take notes of every phone call, so that I didn't miss anything. This also helped with another issue of memory loss I had: the days I did things repetitively because I couldn't remember if I'd already done them or not. I couldn't tell you how many times I shampooed my hair those first few weeks at home because I honestly couldn't recollect doing it beforehand.

And if the memory issue wasn't enough to make me want to sink further into a deep pit of depression, I had to learn to walk all over again. I'd atrophied; my muscles had grown weak from the lack of movement for so many weeks as I healed. The second I regained any kind of mobility in bed I was ushered to the physical therapists and forced to start relearning to walk.

Not that I was complaining, exactly. The alternative of spending my days in a wheelchair because of the accident was not my idea of _life_ at all. But the pain… the aches, the tightness, the sharp stings that shot through me when I took those inching steps in the therapy room… was sometimes almost debilitating. It was appalling, the endless cycle of pain. I hurt constantly, whether I was moving or not. There was never any reprieve, and I wondered how much more I could take… how much more I would _have_ to take and what I'd done so wrong in my short life to have deserved all of this. I just wanted one moment of peace, one moment where my body didn't feel as if it was being constantly punished by some unseen force.

Edward came into the room, twirling a black cane with his hands. He arched his brow and smirked at me, no doubt thinking all kinds of naughty things about that cane since we'd watched some BDSM documentary last night.

There are some nights were there isn't a damn thing on the hospital television. Last night had been one of them.

"Wrong kind of cane," I snarked. "That's the kind that requires SAS shoes to use. Speaking of which, I need those and an old floral dress to wear if I'm going to be forced to use that thing. Oh, and let's not forget the curlers and no bra. I have to look the part."

But at least I'd graduated from a walker. Talk about embarrassing…

He laughed heartily and sat it on the table. "It's just as well; I could never hurt you anyhow. Are you ready for you last doctor's appointment before you're released?"

I shrugged. "It's just like every other appointment. I get some x-rays, they tell me how fucked up I still am, and that it's a miracle I can even walk… which let's face it, babe, I can't walk. I shuffle."

He frowned disapprovingly. "Isabella," he started to warn, only to stop and sigh. "Come on, love. They're waiting for you in the hall."

"Sick of me yet?" I asked, a small smile gracing my lips.

"Slightly."

He helped me up and walked with me as I inched across the room. His unwavering patience sometimes astounded me and made all the resentment I had toward this new life disappear, even if it was only for a few minutes.

He stopped when he heard me sniffle and gently pulled me against him. "One of those days?"

I shrugged and took a deep breath so that I didn't really start crying. "Just… I've just been thinking today."

"Ah. Anything I can do?"

I lifted my head and grinned up at him, determined to shake this despondency. "Shave the beard. You look ridiculous. I miss my husband's face."

He chuckled and kissed the scar the slashed through my forehead. "When you're home, I'll shave. Deal?"

"So then, tonight?"

I felt his smile widen against my skin. "Tonight. Before bed."

"Okay." We started to walk again, slowly making our way down the hall and to the nurse's station. "I don't know why you didn't just shave in the bathroom every morning when you took a shower. No one's stopping you."

"Because I don't care," he answered simply, and I knew exactly what he meant. He'd made it perfectly clear that I was the only thing he cared about right now. He'd not even left the hospital long enough to get a haircut, and God, was he beginning to get a little hippie-ish.

We met up with a nurse and were led to radiology, where I got what was hopefully the last of the gazillion x-rays and scans I'd had in the last few months. I was so tired of being poked and prodded, examined and re-examined… to have the end so near was almost as painful as all the broken bones that had recently mended.

After they were finished with me in radiology, and I'd been give the "okay" to go home, I slowly made my way back up to my room to wait. It was almost second nature to me now; I had a test done, I then waited. Only today's test had felt more pressured… more important, and I knew it was simply me wanting a clean bill of health before I breezed through those doors and never looked back… with the exception of my therapy sessions, of course.

I stopped in the doorway as I spotted Renée sitting on the couch with Riley beside her. She held his hands as he worked to try to steady himself, grinning up at her.

Fuck. My brother was already learning how to sit up. It only served as more evidence to how much I'd missed.

"Hey, sis!" She took Riley's tiny hand and waved it at me. "He's trying to sit up. Want to hold him?"

I shook my head. It was second nature to me now. Everyday, she asked if I wanted to hold him, and everyday, the answer was "no".

"Bella…." She looked so sad, and I hated myself some more for putting that look on her face. "So when do you leave?"

I shrugged one shoulder and hobbled over to the bed. "As soon as the nurse brings me my release forms to sign, I can leave."

She clapped her hands. "Are you excited?"

"I see you are," I laughed.

She rolled her eyes and sat Riley on her lap. "We've been waiting for this day for months. Of course I'm excited."

The nurse rushed through the doors with a stack of papers, causing me to blink in disbelief.

She caught my surprise and laughed. "I thought you'd want to leave as soon as humanly possible."

"Um, yeah."

She laughed a little more.

I signed my papers, listened to my aftercare instructions, and scheduled my first outpatient therapy session. And then this stage of my life was over. I was free.

Edward pushed the cart full of our belongings toward the door before helping me into that God-awful wheelchair.

_Stupid fucking hospital policy._

He gently sat me down and hovered over me, grinning a goofy-looking grin with his happiness. I giggled; I couldn't help myself.

"Ready to go home?" he asked, ignoring my laughter.

Home. I sighed. It sounded wonderful and fucking scary all at once, and I prayed like hell that I'd be happier at home. I was so… tired.

I nodded and pulled him down for a kiss. "Yes. Get me the fuck out of here, please."

I rested his forehead against mine and breathed in deeply, reveling in the moment. "I never thought this day would come," he whispered.

"Glad you had so much faith in me," I shot back with a playful tug on his shirt. I could at least keep this up… keep this normal, even though I felt like I was slowly dying inside.

He pulled away and rolled his eyes. "Be quiet and let me enjoy it. It's been a long time coming."


	42. Chapter 42

**Thanks everyone for the review and adds... Thanks to Peter Parker (Stratan) for the beta work. You can bitch me out, keep watch for updates/teasers on Twitter if you want - (at) JennyB0719**

**Next chapter *was* the last chapter, but I've decided to make what was originally the first epi into the final chapter. Then, there'll be an epi after that. It just makes more sense to me to end it there. So there'll be 44 full length chapters, plus an epi. And no, I don't have plans for a sequel. Nothing I can think up for them would be able to compare to this fic, so I'm not even going to attempt it. Sorry. Feel free to reread as often as you like, though, and of course, anything new I do. I have lots of ideas in my brain... ;)**

**Next update should be on Weds, so long as no one around here gets sick again.**

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* * *

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Chapter 42

**Edward**

I led Bella into the dark, quiet living room and held my breath. I'd kept her out all morning, even though she was exhausted from therapy, just so our family could surprise her with an impromptu, early birthday party. It had been against my better judgment; Bella needed to rest after such a challenging session with her therapist, but I'd hoped (against everything that Alice had said) that seeing everyone—in our home, celebrating something—would lift her spirits a bit.

After all, nothing else I tried seemed to work.

I closed my eyes and flipped on the lights, nearly cringing as I waited for that one, unanimous shout to echo throughout the room.

"Surprise!"

She gasped and threw her hand up to her mouth. Her eyes widened and took in the sight of every single family member, along with Emmett, Rosalie, Angela, and Ben, all standing in our living room, bouncing up and down and beaming at her. Annoyance flickered in her eyes before she masked it with a smile… that universally fake smile that she fell back on whenever she was trying to hide her feelings.

_God, I knew this was a mistake…_

"Uh, wow," she said with a flustered laugh, and my heart ached at how hollow it sounded. "When did you all get here? Who planned this?"

"I did, with Esme, that is," Renée answered, shifting Riley in her arms. "I know you've only been home for a couple of weeks, but I thought a party would be nice. We could celebrate your birthday and the fact that you're back home at the same time."

I exchanged a weary glance with Alice and shook my head. Alice and I hadn't been able to convince Renée that this was, in fact, a horrible idea, and the moment she called Esme, it had all spiraled out of our control. Flights were arranged and hotel rooms were reserved. Before either of us could stop it, the entire family was flying back to LA, after months of keeping track of Bella's progress from afar, and presents had been bought.

"Oh." Bella glanced around and kept the smile plastered on her face for everyone. "Thanks."

I couldn't say anything… couldn't even _begin_ to try to see how she felt. Everyone immediately took up Bella's attention with cake and talk and presents. I stood to the side and paid close attention to her reactions, though. I could see how exhausted and unprepared she was to be in the spotlight after everything she'd been through, even though it wasn't with strangers, but with our family.

And when it was too much for her, when her chin began to tremble with the tears she'd been fighting all afternoon, I led her into the bedroom and shut the door.

"This was… " I took a deep breath to settle myself. "I should have never let our mothers plan this."

"No, it's fine," she whispered. "It's just… I love that everyone's here, but I'm so tired."

"I know. Lie down," I said, cupping her face in my hands. I kissed her once and smiled down at her. "They'll all understand."

The light was slowly fading from her eyes. I could see it in everything she did, everything she said. She thought she was hiding it so well, but she couldn't hide it from me. I was losing her, and I wasn't sure what to do. I wanted to push against it, disallow her from falling deeper into this depression that had gradually overwhelmed her—starting from the day we were introduced to Dr. Fowler—but I wasn't sure that she was ready yet. She was always so strong and independent; however, the accident had taken so much out of her. She wasn't really the girl I fell in love with anymore, just an empty, fragile version of my wife—a stranger masquerading in a familiar form.

God, how I missed her.

Her eyes dulled further and she nodded her head. "Yeah, okay. I'll just go lay down for a while. Where's everyone staying? I didn't even think to ask."

"Not here. No one would dare do that to you," I replied.

She nodded again and turned to hobble to the bed. Watching her was so bloody hard; she refused to let me make any modifications to the house to help her as she recovered.

As soon as she was settled, I left her there, with Samson curled up beside her—he hadn't left her side since she'd come home—and went to tend to everyone else.

Alice frowned as soon as I walked back into the living room. "How's she doing?"

"She's all right, I suppose. She's got the telly on, but I think she's too tired to watch anything. She'll probably sleep for a few hours."

She nodded. "She'll be all right, Edward, I promise."

"When, Alice?" I returned, growing angry. "When will she be all right? What do I have to do to get her there? She's… fading right before my eyes, and there's nothing I can do to stop it."

"You know what she needs," she said calmly, "and you'll know exactly when she needs it."

"I hate that cryptic nonsense," I growled, gathering up the empty plates and stacking them up so that I could take them to the kitchen.

"It's not cryptic," she countered, placing a couple of plates on the pile. "You're just being too compliant. She's still hurt, yes. But she needs help, Edward. Just not physically."

I groaned and shut my eyes. "I know. I'm simply not looking forward to the row that will result when I tell her. How… offended she'll be."

"She won't be offended," she said softly so that no one overheard her. I opened my eyes to see her standing with her arms crossed, an unyielding expression on her face. "She'll be mad, but she won't be offended. She knows you love her and want her to get well… in every way. She'll go, and she'll eventually thank you for it."

I sighed. "We'll see."

"When have I ever been wrong?" she laughed.

My lips twitched, but I managed not to smile. "There's a first time for everything, darlin'."

She scoffed. "I think not."

I got the cake boxed back up, threw away the candles, and loaded the dishwasher, just so I had some mindless task to keep myself busy. All I wanted to do was walk back to the bedroom and check on her, coddle her. And I knew I could no longer do so. It wasn't helping Bella's progress, to cater to her every whim and hover over her. She needed to start doing things on her own again.

When I was finished, I went back into the living room to spend time with everyone, though I was still itching to see how Bella was doing. Esme was playing with Riley while she spoke to Renée; Charlie and Emmett were explaining the differences between rugby and American football to Carlisleduring the college game that was being televised. I sat in the corner and just watched, unable to really participate because I was so bloody worried about Bella.

As always, she consumed my every thought.

Everyone stopped when Bella unexpectedly came back in the room. She looked determined, yet still so sad. She scanned the room until she saw that the only empty seat was that next to Emmett, and she nearly turned around and went back toward the bedroom.

But she didn't. She took a deep breath and slowly made her way to his side. He tensed when he saw her, but said nothing, just kept talking about touchdowns and touchbacks and whatever else he'd been discussing with my father, while Bella carefully sat beside him.

I leaned forward on the edge of my seat, wanting desperately to tell them both to stop being so absurd and just go back to the way things were. Bella needed that normal, joking relationship she'd always had with him. She was treated so much differently by us all—myself included—and needed that one person who could always make her laugh. She needed something light in the midst of all the heaviness around her.

He finally glanced over at her and started chuckling. She turned her head, completely baffled as to why he was suddenly laughing, and then abruptly burst into a fit of giggles as well.

"You have cake all over your face, you moron," she giggled.

He reached up and swiped the icing off of his lips. "You…" He laughed and went to touch the piece of hair that had come out of her ponytail. "You look like Snookie with the rat's nest on top of your head."

Her hand instantly went up to feel at her hair. "I hate that girl. Why didn't anyone fucking tell me?" she asked, yanking her hair tie out.

"I think we were all too busy being shocked that you'd come back already."

"Yeah, well, I felt bad for leaving Edward out here with you guys, when it was supposed to be my party," she mumbled. "So I got up."

"You didn't have to," he responded.

She sighed and let her head fall back against the couch, wincing when the movement resonated throughout her. "Yeah."

"You okay?" he asked, glancing over at me.

I stared back, waiting for her response… hoping she'd start talking about how she really felt.

"Just tired and sore. That PT session was a bitch," she answered with a nonchalant shrug.

I groaned softly and slumped against the chair. Another lie… They all were. She'd put up a wall to keep us all out… a pretense of healing, when all she was really doing was healing her body. And I suddenly found that I couldn't—wouldn't—let her continue to do so. She had to talk to someone… and soon.

Before I lost her for good.

* * *

I ran… all the time now. I ran out my anger, my worry… I ran as a way to keep all my emotions in check. Time was slipping away from me; I could feel it, and Alice's words haunted me. Bella wasn't getting any better, and our move to London had finally been scheduled. I needed her to be well—not just for me, but also for herself—when we left. I needed to know that she'd be all right with the change of scenery… I wanted her to be happy when we spent those first few weeks in the flat, like she would've had all this never happened to her.

My mobile buzzed loudly against the treadmill's console. I stopped the belt and picked it up, rolling my eyes as I looked at the display. In the last couple of days, Zafrina had called me over and over again, but I'd continually ignored her. I just knew it was something about that life I was trying to leave behind… some demand that was being made of me that I could no longer fulfill.

"Hey," I answered, taking a deep pull of my water.

"You sound out of breath," she laughed.

"I was running. Listen, I'm sorry I haven't returned your calls. Things have been rather busy around here," I lied.

"Oh, that's fine. But I really do need to talk to you."

"I figured it would be something like that," I muttered.

"I'm sorry, Edward, really. But the studio has been on my ass for a few days now. They want you to go to New York with the rest of the cast to promote _Rogue's_ DVD release."

"What?" I asked in surprise. "Z, I'm not… No, I can't go."

She sighed. "You have to. This is being categorized as one of your contract obligations. The _only_ obligation."

"Then, they'll have to sue me." There was no way I would leave Bella here alone for a weekend in New York to promote _Rogue's _DVD release.

"Edward," she countered. "Talk to Bella. Then decide. This is their only demand, and frankly, after all the press they lost last spring with Bella's accident-"

I made a face as I walked up the stairs. "Oh, please. They worked Bella's accident in their favor. They made themselves look better with how_ understanding_ they pretended to be."

"It's two days. And with practically everything of that new movie of yours being pushed back to accommodate Bella's recovery, I think it would be wise to put your face out there. Just once."

I ran my hand through my hair. "When?"

"December."

"Z," I groaned. "We're moving in December."

"I know. I'm sorry. I wouldn't have called if I thought there was any way to work this out. But, Edward, they want you there, and they plan to take whatever steps necessary to get you there."

"I'll think about it, talk to Bella about it. That's all I can promise," I huffed.

"Let me know by tomorrow."

"All right."

I put the Blackberry on the counter in the kitchen and went to the bedroom, where I expected to find Bella just as I'd left her… on the bed, staring blankly at whatever the inanimate object of the day was. Today, it was her laptop screen, black and empty.

"I was supposed to be at Oxford now," she said flatly.

"You start in January. It's only four months away."

She said nothing in return. As usual.

"Bella, you'll take a couple of summer courses for a couple of years and be caught up in no time. It's not a problem."

She shrugged and reached down to turn the laptop on. "Sure, baby."

I wanted to strangle her for being so indifferent to it all. This was something she had been so excited for at one time, and now… now she didn't care?

Bollocks.

"So I just got off the phone with Zafrina," I began, changing the subject... frantically trying to get some sort of reaction out of her.

"What'd she want?"

"I've been told I need to go to New York to promote _Rogue's_ DVD release," I explained. "And that if I don't, the studio will take legal action against me."

"So go."

I growled under my breath. "I don't want to go. Not without you…"

"I'm not going anywhere, so I guess you have to go alone. It's fine."

"No, I'd imagine you wouldn't," I said dryly. She never went anywhere, except to her therapy classes. "When was the last time you left the bedroom?"

She opened her mouth to answer, but I cut her off before she could make a sound.

"I don't mean trips to the loo or kitchen, Bella. When was the last time you went outside? Went into the study or got in the car to drive? You're allowed to do that now, and yet, you've not gone anywhere," I said exasperatedly.

"Uh… Last week's PT session," she said, almost robotically.

"Last weeks PT session." I paused, making sure I kept control over my anger. "And when was the last time you did your exercises?"

"Last night, I think?"

Oh, a question… How nice. There was actual intonation in her voice.

"But you don't know."

"I don't remember," she answered, glancing over at me.

"Ah." I couldn't fault her for that. "So, New York. Are you coming? Yes or no?"

"I don't care."

"You don't care." I laughed bitterly. "Do you care about anything?"

She blinked a few times, clearly taken aback.

"Oh, you think I've not noticed?" I snarled, finally releasing all my pent up frustration. Her eyes widened fractionally as I stood to pace the room. "I notice everything, Bella. You can't hide it from me. I've watched you distance yourself from everyone for months, me included."

"I… I'm sorry. It's not a big deal that you go to New York. I'm sure you could use a couple of days away from me. You're around me constantly…"

"Stop. Just stop." I shook my head in disgust. "If you think for one second that I would rather be across the country than with you, you've gone mad. I've had it with all of this. You're getting help. _We're_ getting help. Now."

I strode out of the room and to the study, where I'd kept the card of the psychiatrist that Bella's doctor had recommended to me. I'd expected her to follow me, to put up some sort of fight and be the defiant girl I knew her to be, but there was nothing but silence that followed me. _Bella_ was nowhere in sight.

I dialed the number and spoke to the receptionist. I explained the situation and worked my magic, and within fifteen minutes, I had Bella squeezed in at four.

Just enough time to throw her in the shower.

And that's exactly what I did. I found her curled up in bed, unmoving—uncaring—and scooped her up, careful not to hurt her. She slumped against me as I carried her to the shower and gave me this look when I put her down in the center of the shower… this broken, defeated, wretched look that would stay with me for all my life… until I turned the water on her.

She sputtered under the cold stream, shrieking wildly as her hair fell into her face and water dripped down into her eyes and saturated her clothes. She shivered once, and then glared up at me.

"What the _fuck_?" she screeched.

"You're going to see a psychiatrist. Right now. I can't do this any more."

"_You _can't do this? Who the hell do you-?"

"You need to get a firm grasp of what's important here," I shouted back at her, "and it's not being injured or unable to have babies or that Goddamned bedroom you've been holed up inside for the last month. It's me. It's you, our life. I want you to be happy. I want you to be_ you_. I miss your smile and your laughter. I miss that warm, funny, intelligent woman I married eight months ago."

I knelt down in front of her, taking her and enveloping her in my arms. "I can't sit here and watch you destroy yourself any more."

The water had started to warm up, creating clouds of steam around us. "Edward," she sobbed, "I-"She buried face into my chest and clung to my shirt. "I'm sorry. I'm just so… miserable, and I know I shouldn't be. I should be grateful that I'm even alive; that I can walk, and-"

I grabbed her face and forced her lips to mine, cutting her off. Her fingers wound through my hair, and I moaned as I tasted her. It'd been so long since she'd given herself to me completely, and I wanted—needed—to lay her down and feel her beneath me once again.

I pulled back with a groan, knowing she wasn't in any shape to continue. "You aren't expected to _be_ anything, Bella. You should just be happy."

* * *

**Bella**

I sat on the worn, tan leather couch and glanced around the pale green room. Green was supposedly comforting, but I didn't really feel all that comforted. I hated this place. I hated what it stood for, hated the doctors who made their livings trying to "fix" people like me. I hated that I needed to be here, and that as much as I'd love to deny it, it was helping me.

But most of all, I hated the fact that Edward now needed this. He needed to talk to someone on his own and discuss things together—the crash, our relationship, the impact his career had on us as a couple; _everything_ _imaginable_—with a doctor looking on and taking notes.

Always fucking taking notes.

I hated what I'd done to him. It took me weeks to realize how badly I'd affected him and that while he may not have felt the physical aspects of my recovery, he'd felt every single emotion I had during this… maybe more since _he'd_ been the one to sit and wait for the moment I finally regained consciousness.

And all I could do was wallow in my sorrow.

That one little epiphany had been enough to pull me out of my funk, let go of the anger I had for being dragged—literally—to a shrink every week, and really, truly try to get better. He deserved so much more than what I was giving him, and I was a little ashamed at how I'd behaved. I'd been told that my feelings were normal, expected, but my God… I was so self-centered about it all. I'd never once considered or cared about how Edward felt. It had been all about me; about me being denied the picturesque happily ever after I'd finally let myself believe in again.

And I knew it affected Edward just as profoundly. He was just able to deal with it better than I could, be more optimistic about it all.

I hated that too.

It had been a long process, but I knew that I couldn't keep going like I was, living with this massive boulder sitting on my shoulder. Sure, we could retaliate against the paparazzi and Jane, but what good would it really do? It only reopened wounds that were finally beginning to heal, and at this point, I was ready for it all to disappear. To leave LA behind and finally embark on a life with Edward in London.

I wasn't perfect. I panicked every time I was alone and the paparazzi surged toward me. I panicked when it was just Riley and me, hanging out on the living room floor. I even panicked at the thought of this upcoming weekend, when Edward and I would be in New York.

But I was getting better.

The scratch of a pen moving over paper grated on my nerves, and I tensed up beside Edward, causing him to chuckle under his breath.

"What's the matter?" he asked, turning his body to face me slightly.

"What's she writing down?" I whispered back. "We haven't even said anything yet."

He shrugged his shoulders and smiled. "I've not the slightest idea. Perhaps it's something to do with your earlier session with Garrett?"

"Ah, yes, Garrett," I said dryly. The man who insisted that I call him by his first name. At least this woman didn't force us to call her Siobhan. She was Dr. McKittrick, and she wasn't trying to be our _friend_; she was just our doctor. "Fucking weirdo."

He laughed and wrapped his arm around me, clearly happy that I was making some kind of pathetic joke while stuck in this hellhole. It was an improvement compared to when I first started therapy. That was…

That was bad.

"You're improving, baby." _Ah, see?_ "I notice it all the time."

I sighed and leaned into him. "I know I am. I just wish I was better already."

"Don't rush it. You'll get there… when you're supposed to."

I nodded and blew out my breath loudly, causing Dr. McKittrick to glance up at me. I knew I wasn't to rush through it all, but it did nothing to damper the impatience I had within me. I missed being able to handle things on my own, although, I suppose I never really handled anything. I tended to just avoid whatever it was that caused me to have a negative reaction in the first place.

"How are you feeling?" she asked, her pen pausing.

I rolled my eyes. _How am I feeling? Please._

She smiled and laughed a little. "I meant on the new medication. I should've been more specific."

I smiled back and steadied myself for what was bound to be another emotional session; they all were. "I think I like it. I don't feel any weird side effects like I did with the others. I don't know if it's lifted my mood, though."

"Good," she said happily, writing it down, of course. "It's too early to tell if it is actually doing its job, but we'll keep watch of it for the next couple of weeks. Then we'll know if we've found our winner."

I nodded, thankful that my body was actually accepting some kind of anti-depressant. I was so tired of starting something, weaning myself off of it, and then trying another, only to have to repeat the process all over again.

"So you all are going out of town in a few days," she continued. "How are you preparing for that, Bella?"

"Um, I'm not?" She frowned, prompting me to explain myself. "I've just kind of focused on moving."

Her frown deepened. Yeah, I knew that wasn't what I was supposed to do, but old habits tended to die hard. "When do you move again?"

"On the twenty-sixth," Edward answered. "We plan to have Christmas here with Bella's family, and then head to London. We'll have Christmas with my family on New Year's."

Dr. McKittrick's eyes flickered to me. "Do you think you'll be able to handle that physically, especially after having traveled to New York and back just a couple of weeks before?"

"Yeah," I said softly. "I feel a lot better, and we don't plan to have everything unpacked right away. We're going to take our time with it. I'd like to get done before the semester starts in January, though. I think starting school while still trying to organize the apartment in London might be too much. I've been doing a lot of memory exercises, but I don't know if they're really helping."

"And she doesn't want to fail. God, I'd hate to see her reaction if she failed anything academic," Edward interjected teasingly.

"I could fail," I pouted, giving him a pathetic slap. "I just wouldn't like it."

Dr. McKittrick scribbled on her pad again.

The hour went by quickly, thank God. Sex was the topic of discussion for the day… or lack thereof. Edward hadn't been willing to try anything since I'd left the hospital, too worried that he'd hurt me or cause some kind of unforeseen damage. It was infuriating, but I understood. I didn't think I'd be able to initiate something that could possibly harm him, either.

But that did nothing to stop me from missing it.

Edward and I stopped at reception and made appointments for our usual time and day of the week, and then went outside to face the crowd of paparazzi that were likely waiting for us. I peeked out from behind my sunglasses, satisfied that the number was slowly dwindling down. We were boring now, and we liked it that way. Having them disinterested in us was fantastic, really; it gave us a sense of what normality would be like, and for me it was something to finally look forward to.

True to form, Edward wrapped his arm around me and shielded me from all the noise and camera lenses until we made it to the Aston Martin. He waited until I was inside and buckled up before he walked to the driver's side, shoving his hand through his hair and ignoring every single shout and question hurled at him.

"You realize that will be worse when we get to London, don't you," he stated, starting up the car.

"Yeah."

"I don't mean to pressure you, but you're going to need to adjust to it again. I can—and will—hire as many bodyguards as necessary to guard you after we're settled, but I can't stay with you at all times. We have lives outside of one another."

"So you're saying you don't want to be around me anymore. I get it." I gave him a sideways look and beamed innocently.

He grinned crookedly. "I'm glad you understand. Christ, being around you every single minute of every single day has been quite taxing. I'm not sure how I've managed to stay sane all these months."

I giggled. "I love you. I hardly say it anymore, and I'm sorry."

"I love you." He looked at me strangely. "What brought that on?"

"You just…" I shrugged. "As much as I hate going to therapy, and as mad as I was when you first said that I had to go, I know it's what I needed. I needed to talk to someone about it all, someone who isn't you, because you're so involved."

"Alice said you'd thank me for it," he chuckled.

"And I do. Thank you." I hurriedly pulled my phone out of my purse. "And it'll ring right…" The phone chimed in my hand, and I threw my head back and laughed. It felt so good to be happy about something, even if it was as unimportant as Alice calling when she was proven right. "Now."

Edward shook his head. "She's calling to gloat, you know."

"I know." My lips twitched in amusement. "Should I let her?"

"Just this once. She should know how grateful I am to her for getting my wife back. Slowly, but surely, you're coming back to me." He stopped and looked away.

"What?"

He shook his head and smiled. "Never mind. Want to pick up a bite to eat before we head home?"

"Um, okay."

"All right." He hit the button on the phone so that Alice didn't hang up and call again. "We'll talk about it when you're through."

* * *

"Emmett McCarty, you are coming to our house for Christmas," I said fiercely as I stepped into the kitchen.

"Bella, I always go to-"

"Your mom can kiss my ass this year. I'm leaving the next day for London. _London_, Emmett," I said emphatically. "Who knows when we'll see each other next?"

He groaned in annoyance.

"Besides, Rosie already promised me that she'd be here. So it looks like you'll be facing the parents alone if you go."

"I hate you," he grumbled.

"I'm okay with that."

He laughed. "Fine. I'll call her now. See if maybe I can convince her that seeing her the weekend after is just as good. I'll talk to you later."

I grinned victoriously and ended the call. As soon as I'd freed myself of all the grocery bags, I turned and bent over to pet Samson.

"Hello, Sammy. How are you?" I cooed, laughing when he barked excitedly in my face.

If someone had told me a year ago that this dog would have been my best friend—my comfort when Edward wasn't near—during my lowest of days, I'd have called the psych ward and had them hauled away in a straightjacket.

But there was no doubt about it; he was.

After giving him a couple of minutes of attention, I stood up and sidestepped him to find Edward. I went through the maze of partially packed boxes that led to the bedroom as I searched for him, mentally cursing at myself for not getting these things packed and out of the way.

"Baby?" I called out. "I'm back!"

I heard the shower running, so I went into the bathroom to talk to him. "Hey," I said as I walked through the door. "I'm home."

"Bella," he grunted, causing my steps to falter.

He was… My mouth dropped as realization filled me.

_Ohhh…_

I started to turn around and go back out into the bedroom to give him some privacy, but my curiosity got the best of me… that and the sudden streak of desire that shot through me with the raspy moan that came out of his mouth. It'd been months since we'd really touched each other. Emotions, negativity and fear always seemed to get in the way. Before I knew it, I found myself standing with the shower door open, staring at Edward in…

I had no words. My throat had gone dry. It was the hottest fucking thing I'd ever seen in my life.

The hand that had been holding my body up slipped on the slick tile, sending me forward. I stumbled into the shower gracelessly and bit back a scream as pain shot through me.

I stayed absolutely still, knowing that Edward was likely turned around by now and watching me. My hair formed a curtain around my face, blocking his view, which was perfect, because it was currently contorted in pain.

_Holy fuck that hurts_, I thought in bewilderment.

"Baby, what are you doing?" he asked. His voice was thick and just managed to pull me away from the streaking pain that radiated throughout my torso.

"I uh…" I took a deep breath and forced myself to look at him.

He laughed. "You're red as a tomato. Did you… Were you watching me?"

I nodded. "I should have just let you continue. I shouldn't have interr-"

His groan cut me off. "I don't know why, but that is so hot."

I blinked. "Watching you?"

He nodded.

"Oh, well, I have to admit that being the one to do the watching was pretty hot too."

"Was it?" he asked with a smirk.

A shaky laugh escaped my lips. This man was going to kill me before the night was over. "Yeah."

He was at my side in an instant, cupping my face in his hands and taking his mouth with mine. He was gentle and easy, but there was a fire that burned beneath the cautious exterior, one that had me moaning unabashedly.

"God, I've missed you," he moaned. He pressed me into the wall; the hard, sharp lines of his body molded against mine.

"You're going to… I mean, really? It's been so long," I stammered, letting my hands skim over his wet skin.

"I'm going to try," he answered lowly, trailing his tongue over my neck. "Is that all right?" he asked, nipping at my ear.

"God, yes," I breathed.

"Tell me if you need to stop," he said in return. "As soon as you need me to stop."

His fingers grazed my nipple, and I could only nod and cling to him so that I didn't slither down the wall into a puddle of goo at his feet.

His knee came up to spread my legs, and pain rocketed through me again. I broke away from the kiss, gasping for air. Concern instantly knit his brow, and he was suddenly backing away from me and dragging his hands through his wet hair.

"What did I do? Did I hurt you?" he demanded anxiously. "I knew I shouldn't have-"

"You didn't do it, Edward," I interrupted, straightening up so that I could see how bad I'd hurt myself. "I slipped when I came in here. You hadn't even noticed me yet."

"You _slipped_?" he asked incredulously. "Shit! How… how badly did you injure yourself?"

If I hadn't been so angry with myself for ruining the moment, I might've laughed at him. He was extremely cute in his worry.

"I don't know," I said calmly. "I haven't tried to take a step yet."

He nodded and took another step back, giving me room to maneuver, and then abruptly changed his mind.

He shook his head furiously and scooped me up in his arms like I was nothing. "You know what? I prefer that you do this on the carpet, where you can't do further damage to yourself by slipping on the wet tile again."

"But you're still kind of soapy," I giggled.

He shrugged and hurried us out of the bathroom. "I can finish after we've assessed the problem." He set me down and stared down at my legs, keeping his arm wrapped around me the entire time. "Well, walk."

I went to take a step, only to gasp and fall against him. "Fuck, that hurt!" I shouted, gritting my teeth.

"It's okay," he whispered. "You're all right. Can I move you?"

"Yeah. I think so. It just… It hurts when I put weight on my right leg. Like something's twisted in my hip." I shook my head as I changed my mind. "No, my groin. Maybe I pinched a nerve?"

"Possibly."

He carefully picked me up and carried me over to the bed. He dripped water all over the comforter as he leaned over and put me down.

He pressed a kiss in my hair, and then stared at me seriously. "You know what this means, don't you?"

"Not a clue. Gimme a sec." I paused. "Oh, it means that I'll be going back to therapy a lot?" I guessed.

He exhaled loudly. "No, Bella. It means you're not going to New York with me this weekend."


	43. Chapter 43

**Thanks for the reviews and recent adds to favorite lists. I appreciate everyone sticking with this rollercoaster ride lately. It's almost over! *cries* By the way, this chapter was originally the end, but the characters haven't STFU yet, so you get a couple of bonus chapters instead. Lucky you ;p**

**Thanks to the almighty Stratan for the beta work. I'll see everyone next Wednesday, unless you wanna come chat on the Twitter (at) JennyB0719.**

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* * *

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Chapter 43

**Edward**

"God fucking damn it," Bella cursed, grinding her teeth together as the physical therapist started rotating her leg. "That hurts."

She nodded, never looking up from her work. She was used to Bella's random outbursts after all this time. "You have to be more careful," she scolded. "You'll never be perfect, but you'll never come close if you're constantly falling."

"I'm clumsy. What the hell do you expect me to do?" Bella retorted angrily. "Sit on my ass and do nothing for the rest of my life?"

The therapist sighed and gently put Bella's leg down. "I don't know. You're lucky you didn't cause any more damage," she said, finally meeting Bella's gaze. "You could have needed corrective surgery."

"You're certain the scans showed nothing serious?" I interjected worriedly. "I'm leaving for New York in three days. I need to know what to do before I go to ensure that she'll be all right."

The therapist moved across the room to search through the drawers. "The scans didn't show anything out of the ordinary. You have to remember that she's still weak. It doesn't take much to strain the muscles and tendons in her pelvic region. She should be like she was in a week or so, as long as she continues to come in for therapy and _stays off her feet_."

"Have I ever missed an appointment?" Bella asked, raising her brow. "Have I ever not done what you've asked of me?"

"No. You haven't," she admitted. "It's why you're doing as well as you are in such a short amount of time. Most people would still need to use a walker or a cane with the type of injuries you had." She glanced over at me. "Is it hard to live with such a strong willed person? Surely you two fight a lot."

I chuckled. "No, not exactly. I suppose being stubborn has worked to her benefit, especially in this instance."

She handed Bella a stack of papers covered in diagrams of the exercises she was expected to do and smiled. "You might need a friend to help you do these over the weekend while Mr. Masen's away. Some of them require resistance."

Bella rifled through the papers. "How often do I have to do them?"

"Every night," the therapist answered, causing Bella to groan. "You still have everything to ice yourself down afterwards?"

Bella nodded. "It's all still attached to that stupid cooler."

The therapist laughed. "How about we ice you down for a couple hours before you go? I'm guessing after the strain I put you through today, you could use it."

Bella practically hopped down from the table, landing on her good leg. "Yes, please. It's so much better when I don't have to set it all up myself."

I scoffed. "How many times have you actually had to set it up? I seem to remember doing it all for you."

"Well then, it's nice when you don't have to set it all up either." She smiled at me winningly. "Better?"

I rolled my eyes and helped her toward the door, refusing to answer the question. I led her back toward the room we'd spent so much time together in and watched as she broke away from me and limped over to where her physical therapist was waiting for her.

I hated that she'd done this to herself just to… Well, I wasn't entirely sure what she was planning on doing. Join in? I didn't feel guilty exactly… more like disappointed that I'd finally stopped being such a git and tried to make love to her again, only to likely harm her further when I started to push myself in between her legs. It made me even more afraid to touch her. I was so much stronger than her. We were occasionally rough and reckless; desire typically consumed me and clouded my mind. How on earth was I supposed to check the urge to just plow into her when I could barely think straight?

It was all so bloody difficult, all the time for us. It was like one thing after another since the crash. Something was always causing us to stumble, disallowing us to be truly happy again.

"You okay?" Bella asked, giving me an odd look.

"Absolutely brilliant," I lied, causing her to snort with laughter.

"If you insist."

The physical therapist wrapped Bella's hip up in an ice pack and took her hand to steady her as she lied down in the recliner. A quick flip of the machine caused the familiar buzzing noise to sound steadily throughout the room, and I dragged an empty chair over to where Bella sat and geared up for the hours of waiting. I got out both of our iPods and passed Bella's to her, watching her as she slipped her ear buds in her ears, tapped the screen, and then closed her eyes as the music streamed through the speakers.

I repeated the process for myself, opting to keep one of my ear buds out so that I could hear my mobile if it rang. There was so much that I needed to take care of now, before I left. Emmett was still readily available, and would be staying by Bella's side if she chose to go somewhere while I was away, but I'd called a security company and hired a team of guards to watch her every move. She'd never be able to leave the house without someone watching her for me, which I was extremely grateful for. She also had a driver to take her wherever she pleased. There was no way anyone, other than a professional, was getting behind the wheel while I was away. I had a job to do, and I wouldn't be able to concentrate if I was anxiously checking my mobile for another awful phone call or worrying about what was happening with Bella while I was so many miles away.

It pained me to leave Bella behind, but I knew it was impossible to drag her with me, no matter how much I selfishly wanted to. She was still so fragile; this setback could have been so much worse, and if she were to come with me to New York, she would only push herself and cause greater damage to her body. The last thing I ever wanted was to watch her being rolled away in a hospital gurney to have some unnecessary surgery performed on her pelvis again, simply because she spent a weekend living it up in Manhattan.

And we'd agreed last night when we talked about it. Bella knew herself well enough to know that she'd never be able to step foot in Manhattan without attempting to ride the subway across town or take a walk in Central Park. A wheelchair wouldn't suffice. It would only hinder her innate curiosity and frustrate her more. It seemed as if our only option was for her to stay home and rest and recuperate, while I spent the weekend bar hopping and doing interviews on every single nationally televised show that was filmed there.

I wanted to believe that the separation would do us some good. We'd seen each other day in and day out for the last eight months, only parting long enough for one of us to run a few necessary errands, and then coming right back home. It was inevitable that we start to get on each other's nerves. Whereas most relationships had space, we had none whatsoever. We'd been thrown into a situation that neither of us had been prepared for and had both made a lot of mistakes in the process. I felt closer to her now, but it had yet to feel "normal". She was here; she was with me, but she wasn't quiet whole. I wasn't sure if she'd ever feel the way she had before the accident again. There was so much for her to work through… the ramifications of our life together after the crash. It was enough to cause anyone to harbor the resentment she'd said she felt over it all. She'd done nothing but fall in love and marry an actor and now…

"Hey," Bella whispered, reaching out to stroke my arm. "What are you thinking about over there?"

"Leaving you."

"Oh." She took a deep, sleepy breath and shifted slightly. "I thought we agreed it was better for me to stay. I mean, it was your idea in the first place, but it was a good idea. There's no way I could go to New York with you without fucking something up even more."

And yet I couldn't help but wonder if leaving for New York without her would be another mistake. We were so close to leaving LA and starting all over. She'd have so much to adjust to while still working through everything the accident had brought on: a new home; a new continent; a new school; new therapists and doctors…

I shrugged and smiled reassuringly at her. "I'm simply worrying. It's no matter."

She pinched me; I jerked my arm away from her with a frown. "It does matter. I don't want you going off on some trip, worrying over me the whole time. I'm not doing anything to put myself in danger. I'm going to stay home and pack. I promise."

I leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "I know. I just want you to be careful. Do not lift a single box while I'm in New York, do you hear me?"

She giggled. "I hear you, freak. I'll make Emmett help me load everything out to the empty garage bay…"

She trailed off, and I knew exactly what she was thinking. That empty garage bay once housed our Range Rover.

"We can buy another," I offered quietly, staring down at my hands. "If you want to. It was supposed to be your car, after all."

She waved me off. "What's the point? We won't be here for much longer, and we're selling the house anyway."

"True, but you could keep one at the house in Malibu. It saved your life, Bella. If you'd happened to have been in any of the other cars…" I stopped short, unable to continue.

"But I wasn't, baby. Remember?"

I glanced back up and saw her grinning at me. She'd gotten so much better in the last couple of months. It sometimes astounded me how… resilient she was. She was contradictory as ever, striving to heal every part of her while still holding on to the one thing she could never have.

I smiled in return. "I think we should purchase another. Possibly on one of our trips back to LA." Perhaps it would be some strange form of closure for us, to see a similar SUV sitting in the garage in Malibu.

Her grin widened. "Yeah, okay. Maybe we should."

* * *

A familiar squeal pierced the air the moment I stepped foot in the house. I stared toward the living room in confusion, unable to decide if I'd been imagining things or if I'd really heard Riley's voice echoing throughout the house. Neither Renée nor Phil's cars were out front, and Bella had never been around that baby without it being forced upon her. For him to be here, without his parents, was incredibly surprising.

He squealed again, this time with a giggle afterward, and I hurried down the corridor so that I could see it with my own eyes because this was just too… unbelievable to me. I stopped just at the threshold of the room, nearly ramming my knee into the baby gate that had somehow been set up so that Riley couldn't crawl throughout the house. I stepped over the gate and turned my head to see Bella lying facedown on the floor in the middle of a dozen toys scattered about with Riley lightly smacking her back.

"Hello," I said in wonder. "What's he doing here?"

"Renée needed a babysitter so she could finish her Christmas shopping. I offered," Bella answered, lifting her head to look at me.

"You offered," I repeated, still in shock.

"I know your flight's in a few hours. You don't mind, do you?"

"No," I assured her. How could I mind progress? "Not at all. How… Erm, how is it going for you?"

"I've had a couple of moments," she admitted. "But I'm trying here, Edward. I'm really trying."

I nodded, moving across the room slowly, like I was trying not to frighten some wild animal. It was absolutely ridiculous, but I couldn't help it. I just kept waiting for her to panic. She did every single time she was left alone with him. Why would this time be any different?

"You're doing well, then, baby," I finally replied, smiling warmly at her. I'd never seen her allow a baby to get so close to her before, not since the accident. It was… heart wrenching and exciting, all at once.

"Thanks. He's bored. I can't really do much with him," she said, rolling away from him and sitting up carefully.

"Ah. Did Renée bring all of this with her? Set up the gate?"

"Yeah. She said that he was a handful," she replied, watching as Riley started to crawl over to a colorful little keyboard. "She wasn't kidding. I'm exhausted."

I chuckled and sat beside her. "I'd imagine so."

Conversation lulled for a few minutes as we focused on Riley chewing on everything he could get his hands on. I knew Bella had something on her mind by the way she was fidgeting beside me. She handed Riley a toy and glanced over at me awkwardly.

I threw my arm around her and brought her into my side. "What is it?"

She breathed in deeply a few times, trying to work through whatever she was about to say. "I was thinking we should get a second opinion," she whispered. "I just… What if she was wrong? What if there's some surgery they can do to fix it? Not my pelvis, obviously, but the other issues."

A strange sense of foreboding slammed into me, and I knew immediately that she was pushing herself too hard. I wanted to encourage her to move forward, but I wanted to be realistic at the same time. She wasn't ready to go through all those tests, even if the outcome was positive. She wasn't ready for any more surgery and… My God, we hadn't even gotten our sex life back yet. How could we even be discussing this?

"What if she was right? Could you handle receiving that news again?" I returned cautiously. "I'm more than willing to see as many doctors as you'd like, love. But I can't watch you go through that again."

She shrugged against me, saying nothing.

"We can make a few phone calls and probably weasel our way into the best obstetrician's office in the city tomorrow, if that's what you want," I said reluctantly.

She chewed on her lip as she thought about it, and then abruptly shook her head. "Not yet. I'm not ready yet. Even if there was something they could do to make it so that we could have our own baby, my body's not ready for that yet. There's so much… trauma involved with a c-section. I-"

"You have done so well," I interrupted, "but you know you're not ready emotionally, either. This is the first time you've let Riley come near you in nearly eight months. Don't rush things. We have plenty of time ahead of us."

She shuddered once, and I held her closer. "I've just made you wait, and I-"

"Isabella. I've said this over and over again: I may not be the most patient person in the world, but with you, I'll wait. I'll wait for as long as you need me to. I want it to be right. I don't want you to have any regrets or do anything for anyone but yourself." She glanced up at me, her eyes brimming with tears. "It's your decision, just like everything else has been. When you're ready, we'll make it happen."

She sighed and wiped at her face before resting her head against my chest. "Maybe when we're settled in London," she said wistfully.

"Sounds like a good plan," I agreed.

After a while, something shifted within her—likely from her dwelling on a second opinion—and I could feel her panic building in the air around us. I worked to calm her down as best as I could, but I knew I couldn't completely head it off. Only she could do that. I knew she had the strength to do it; she merely needed the willingness now. She was so hung up on babies… I could do nothing for her until she finally let it all go and realized that, while it wasn't fair by any means, it wasn't the end of the dream.

Enough time had passed that I thought she might not be panicking after all, but one adorable, little move of Riley's caused any progress she might have made to shatter instantly. It all seemed so innocent. Riley crawled over to Bella and used her stomach to help himself stand, and then he leaned forward and placed the sloppiest kiss he could muster on her cheek, giggling and falling back down on his arse as he pulled away.

"I can't." She jerked out of my arms and shot up off the floor, wincing as she reached for the set of crutches her physical therapist had given her.

I watched her hurry over to the gate, brace herself on the doorjamb, and manage to cross it before she burst into hysterics.

I sighed and turned my attention back to Riley, brushing a lock of dark brown hair back off his forehead. "You've done it now, mate."

He cooed happily in response.

I stood up and picked Riley up off the floor, following Bella into the bedroom to make sure she was all right. I opened the door, expecting her to be curled up in a ball, only to find her throwing on a sweatshirt and reaching for her shoes.

"What are you doing?" I asked in my own sort of panic.

"I can't stay here with him. I need air. I can't… breathe," she gasped.

"No. You stay here. We'll go." She froze and stared up at me. "I'll… call Rosalie to come sit with you and take him for a walk or something. Lie down. We'll be out of here before you know it."

She visibly relaxed and nodded, throwing her shoes back toward the closet.

"Bella, call your therapist," I said, turning toward the door. "You need to talk to him. Work through it."

"Yeah, okay. I'm sorry," she whispered guiltily. "So sorry."

"Don't be, baby. I expected you to be on the floor, seized by a panic attack, and you weren't."

She smiled slightly. "Yeah, I guess I wasn't."

I waited until she had dialed her therapist's number before leaving her alone. I took Riley into the kitchen and found his coat, carefully sitting him on the counter and slipping his arms through it before tugging my own coat on as well. I sent a text off to Rosalie, briefly explaining the situation, and got a response back immediately. She wasn't too far away and would be by in no time. I could keep Riley away from the house long enough for Bella to work through the problem and possibly take some of her anxiety medication, quickly finish packing my bags, and leave her and the baby with Rosalie and the knowledge that she'd be well taken care of.

Thank God.

I put Samson on his leash and opened the gates at the end of the drive. I walked down the drive, dialing Renée's number as we made we made our way to the street.

"You need to pick up Riley, now," I said by way of greeting when she answered.

"I'm right in the middle-"

"I don't care," I snarled. "Bella's inside the house on the verge of a panic attack. I've got the baby and am taking him for a walk. Come get him."

She sighed heavily. "I thought she was okay… She sounded okay when she offered."

"She lied."

She cursed under her breath. "I'll finish up here and be there as soon as I can. Edward," she paused, "I'm sorry. I really thought-"

"I know. I'd hoped as well." I cleared my throat, unwilling to think about it any more. "I'll see you when you get here."

I put the mobile in my pocket and shut the gates using the keypad. I started down the sidewalk, adjusting my hold on the baby as I watched the sun slowly drop in the sky. I spotted a few paparazzi in the distance, quietly snapping pictures of us as we made our way through the neighborhood, but I ignored them. I hadn't said a word to anyone from the press since Bella had first been in the hospital. I was only breaking my self-imposed silence in order to fulfill my "obligation" for _Rogue_.

I wasn't entirely sure how long I had walked through the neighborhood. I knew it would start cooling off more when the sun went down, so I decided to turn around and head back to the house. And all at once, a sudden realization hit me, causing my heart to drop instantly. Bella hadn't panicked… at all.

She had tried to run, instead.

* * *

**Bella**

The second Edward left me alone in the bedroom I hit the end button on my phone and threw it down on the bed. I didn't want to talk to my therapist. I wanted to fucking figure this out on my own. I knew I could do it; I'd been working up to it all of these weeks. It was the stupidest thing I could have ever done, not taking any anxiety medication or talking to Garrett, but I needed to feel that sense of satisfaction that came with getting through one of these panicked moments on my own.

I wanted to pace the room while I thought, but I was still so sore from my almost-fall that I couldn't. So I leaned over on the bed and just… cried. I was having a bad night; rationally, I knew it would pass, but it was so hard to remember that when all I could think about was second opinions, surgeries… lost hope. Being alone with Riley for all that time had just amplified the situation. I couldn't share the experience of having a baby with Edward or watch those coppery-haired babies run the lawn with Samson like I had envisioned so long ago without having my eggs harvested, babies made in a little Petri dish, and relying on some stranger to bring one of them into the world for me. It was so fucking complicated…

Worse still, was the fact that I couldn't let it go. I had no personal issues with adoption or surrogacy; I just couldn't get past the fact that it wouldn't be me. It would _never_ be me.

But I'd been trying… so hard. I had such a long way to go, but I wanted to be me again. I wanted to move on and be happy with Edward. I was letting everything else fade away; the crash, the paparazzi, the pain, and the strain it once had on my relationship with Edward. I didn't even mind being unable to go with Edward to New York, really, because I knew setbacks were just a part of my recovery.

I was here, alive, and I still had a man who was here for me through it all. I was able to move forward with everything else—move across the Atlantic Ocean, start a new school, meet new people—but I couldn't move forward with this. I couldn't get past the unfairness, the sense of loss that would just randomly pop up on me and consume me. I would be fine for days—think I was finally getting over it—and then suddenly, like today, I would be unable think of anything else and would feel as if I was right back where I started, lying in that hospital bed and feeling my heart break all over again.

Numerous therapy sessions had told me why, even though I didn't believe in any of it. I'd supposedly spent so many years thinking that 'Happily Ever After' was bullshit, only found in fairy tales written for little girls. I spent weeks fighting against the pull Edward had, unable to accept that love actually existed, and then I finally gave in. I gave him everything I had and worked through all the fear his love made me feel. I got to the point that I was excited and, more importantly, _ready_ to give marriage and a family a shot, because all the failed relationships and horror stories I'd heard from the people around me—my mother's fucked up past—didn't reflect on me. It couldn't influence a single part of my relationship with Edward, as long as I didn't let it

And then, when I was happy, comfortable, optimistic, and felt fucking _blessed_ to have found Edward, it all came crashing down around me. My fairy tale disappeared with the sound of the SUV rolling down the mountain. I felt wronged, cheated out of something I had only just recently allowed myself to want. We had a plan, a future, and it was all taken away from us in a blink.

I took a deep breath and tried to think of something else—anything else. I grabbed the notebook I had on the nightstand and started running through the enormous list I'd made earlier in the week so that I made sure that I left nothing behind when we finally left for England. Certain things stayed here in LA and were sent to the house in Malibu, while others were packed up in boxes and shipped overseas before we even left. We were scheduled to arrive to an apartment full of cardboard boxes waiting to be unpacked. It was daunting, checking things off as I tried to remember what had been packed and what hadn't, but it somehow soothed me. It forced me to focus on something other than the ache in my chest and the tears that weren't subsiding.

I crawled up on the bed and fumbled for the remote, hoping to resemble some form of normal by the time Edward came back with Riley. I couldn't let him leave thinking I was anything less than okay, even if I felt like I was suffocating… like a heavy weight was resting on my chest…

The sudden blare of the TV had me jumping in place. I hurriedly tapped on the volume button to turn it down, only to freeze at the segment currently being shown on that God-awful celebrity channel.

Talk about Edward, Jacob, Tanya, and the upcoming DVD release of _Rogue_ filled the room. They panned to pictures of everyone at the premiere, talked about why the "film's star" had been absent. They then skipped to pictures of Edward and me coming out of our psychiatrists' office, speculating about all of the reasons why we were there—anything from depression (which was the truth) to marriage issues were spouted off as if they were nothing.

"_Masen is set to attend the DVD release party this upcoming weekend in Manhattan. His wife was originally joining him; however, it's been recently announced that she will be _unable_ to attend. One starlet that won't be missing the party?"_ Stupid, dramatic pause._ "Tanya Denali. This will be her first appearance since having her son in August…"_

I stopped listening, too focused on the clip that was now playing. My mouth dropped as I saw Edward and Tanya walking out together, smiling and waving at the crowd that awaited them in Japan. She was… beautiful, radiant. Edward murmured something in her ear, and she nodded in return. He glanced down at the slight swell of her stomach, and then right back up to her face, silently asking if she was okay. She beamed back up at him, nudging him with her elbow and rolling her eyes at his concern…

My stomach churned at the sight. It was everything I fucking wanted and could no longer have, everything I wanted to give him, but couldn't.

He deserved so much more than this.

And with that one thought, I was up off the bed and digging an overnight bag out of the closet. I grabbed whatever was closest and stuffed it all inside the bag before hobbling over to the bathroom and grabbing my toothbrush, toothpaste, and my medication. I didn't have any specific destination in mind; I just needed to leave before Edward came back and stopped me. I knew if I saw his face, caught his warm, familiar scent, I'd never make it out that door…. and I needed for him to find someone better, someone who wasn't so fucking damaged.

I put on a pair of ballet flats and a sweater, and then threw the bag over my shoulder. I grabbed my crutches and was out the door in a blink, too caught up in the frenetic need to escape to really think about what I was doing and the impact it was going to have on the rest of my life. And forget about where I was going to go. I only knew that I needed to find some place that Edward couldn't have easy access to me... some place that would hopefully force him to stop and realize how bad I was for him.

I tossed the bag into the backseat of my Audi, along with the crutches, and practically fell into the driver's seat, blindly searching for the button on the garage door opener. I went to turn the keys in the ignition, but found that I was shaking so violently that I couldn't latch onto them.

"Fuck, fuck… No," I sobbed, wiping at my cheeks. Now was not the time to break down. I could do that later. "I can't. God, I-"

I cut myself off, knowing that I was just rambling incoherently. I focused on the keys, steadying myself, and finally managed to start the car.

I was down the driveway in no time, anxiously waiting for the gate to open up enough for the car to fit through the space… and then I was gone, racing down the streets of LA in a haze.

_Forks._

It was the only destination I could think of. It was the one place—no matter how much Charlie cared for Edward—that Edward wouldn't be able to use his connections to get to me. Charlie would make it so that I never saw Edward, if that's what I wanted, a thought that had my heart clenching.

Never seeing him again… Jesus.

Fresh tears sprung to my eyes, and I had to stop trying to flee and pull over, too overcome with tears to drive safely. And the last thing I wanted was to wreck… again.

I maneuvered through the streets, not paying attention to where I was. I parked the car and got out, determined to get some fresh air and calm down so that I could get out of LA before I changed my mind.

And then I looked around. I'd thought I had been going north… toward the only home I had ever known before Edward, but I'd unconsciously been beckoned somewhere else. I hadn't been here in over a year. The last time I'd been here, I'd literally _crashed_ into Edward.

I just fucking stopped and stared at the ground. I'd walked to the very spot that I'd first laid eyes on him, the place where I first felt his hands touch my skin and that curious buzz that caused my heart flutter with nerves. The Hollywood Stars surrounded me, tourists passed and pointed at the various signs aligning the boulevard. Some recognized me and murmured with delight to one another, jerking their cameras up to document their first "celebrity" sighting…

But none of it mattered. I couldn't move, couldn't breathe, for what felt like the millionth time in just a couple of hours. I was literally rooted to the spot, just at a loss as to what to do next. He was… everywhere, disabling me from making my escape.

"Bella?" a familiar voice called out, walking toward me from the entrance of the Kodak Theatre. "Bella fucking Swan," he laughed. "Well, I guess I can say 'Masen' now, huh? It's not really a secret anymore."

I slowly forced myself to face him and wave. "Hi, Jake. Long time no see."

"I'll say." His dark brows furrowed as he looked me over. "You okay? I mean, you're holding up all right?"

I shrugged a shoulder and looked away, back to the theater. "Not really," I replied. My voice sounded so far away.

"Hey." He snapped his fingers in front of my face. "Do I need to call Edward?"

_Edward._

His name was like a dagger through my heart. "Jake," I said brokenly, and then was suddenly changing topics. "Did you know this is where we first saw each other? This exact spot?"

"So you're here to reminisce?" he questioned, taking a step forward.

"Not exactly," I admitted. "Why aren't you on a flight to New York?"

"I don't leave for another three hours or so," he responded.

"Edward's supposed to be leaving now," I whispered. My eyes burned with tears again.

"Bella, you're freaking me out," he said, grabbing my shoulders and forcing me to look at him. "What the hell is going on?"

"I don't know," I whimpered. "I was trying to leave, go to my dad's-"

"Wait, you were trying to leave?" He thought for a moment. "_Leave Edward?"_

I nodded.

He abruptly burst into a fit of laughter, causing me to blink in confusion. "Are you stupid, Bella?"

"Uhh…"

"Look around you," he continued. "Look where you ended up. You're going nowhere. You can't fucking leave him. Why would you even try?"

"I can't… I mean," I stammered. "He wants a family. I can't-"

"That is such bullshit," he snapped. "Stop with the self-pity. You got a bad lot in life—so do a lot of people. But Edward doesn't want you just to _procreate _with you, though, I'm sure he enjoys the…" I made a face at Jacob talking about my sex life. "Yeah, anyway. He wants you because he loves you. Jesus Christ, I've never seen a man so in love with someone before. It's fucking sickening."

I giggled._ Actually_ giggled at his speech.

He smiled back. "So what are you going to do?"

"I…" I glanced around and suddenly felt… lighter, more like _me_. I could let this fester and eat away at me until it ruined every part of my life. Or I could take it and use it, learn from it… grow from it.

"I'm going home," I breathed, letting my lips curve a little.

"That a girl."

"Thank you, Jake."

He waved me off. "You'd have figured it out. I just made you do it sooner." He glanced behind me, toward my car. "You should go. Stop talking to me."

I grinned. "Yeah, okay."

I spun around with renewed purpose, only to stop short at what was standing just a few feet away from me. Edward, gorgeous and disheveled as always, was next to the car. He was still and stoic, gazing at me impassively, and then he suddenly started moving toward me.

I tried to get my bearings, glancing away from him until I was sure I could speak. "Um, hi," I whispered when he was near.

"Hi," he said unemotionally.

"Looks like my job here is done. Later, dudes," Jacob murmured as he slunk away.

Edward and I both shot him a quick look. Fucking moron.

I focused on Edward again. "Wha-? How did you know I was here?" I asked, completely dumbfounded. "You're supposed to be catching a flight to New York."

"Alice," he said simply.

Damn it. I hadn't considered Alice when I was throwing all my stuff in a duffle bag earlier.

"You are aware this isn't going to work," he said casually, moving a lock of hair off my shoulder. I instinctively leaned into his touch, squeezing my eyes closed and fighting the urge to wrap my arms around him. "You running from me? It won't work. I go where you go. Until the day I die."

I took a deep breath and decided to tell him how I was feeling… before the talk with Jacob. It's what I should've done in the first place. You'd think after all these months of therapy that I'd have gotten it through my thick skull… but no.

"I was leaving because I thought I wasn't any good for you," I whispered. "I-"

"Isabella," he said gently. "You are the best thing that ever happened to me."

"But I… I can't give you what you want. I… I'm broken," I sobbed. "You deserve so much better."

"I deserve you; what you can give me." I stared up at him, letting him wipe away my tears. "You give me what I want, what I need."

"I saw you with Tanya, Edward." He looked so confused, so I explained further. "There was an interview on TV from when you were in Japan. She looked so beautiful… and you looked so concerned for her. It's the one thing you want that I can't give to you anymore. I… I thought you should find someone who could. And so I left."

His eyes flashed darkly, and he took another step toward me, causing our bodies to brush against each other. "A baby?" he snarled, towering over me with anger. "That's what this is about? _Tanya's_ baby?" He shoved a hand through his hair, clearly pissed. "Christ, we can have babies, Bella, as many as you want. Just not in the conventional way. How many times must we go over this? You were just talking about second opinions! I thought…"

"Edward," I sighed.

"Don't 'Edward' me," he said mockingly. "This," he waved between us, "is rubbish. You don't simply give up on what we have because you have some warped way of thinking that you don't deserve me anymore. What happened to you was awful… God, was it awful. But don't you dare try to run from me. I spent months deprogramming that bloody flight instinct of yours. I'm not about to let you just walk out of my life now. You're too important to me. I love you, more than I could ever try to love any other woman on this earth. Nothing that has happened to you; nothing you can say will ever change that.

"I know you love me. You're just…" His demeanor changed, suddenly shifting to a resoluteness I'd never seen in him. "You're panicking again, and I'm not letting you go."

Tears streaked down my cheeks again, and my chest heaved with my sobs. "I _do_ love you. I was-"

"Then what are you doing?" he asked exasperatedly.

"I don't know," I said weakly. "Being an idiot?"

He chuckled and took the one final step necessary to make our bodies flush with one another. "I won't debate that point."

I laughed and finally allowed myself to touch him, skimming over his fingers with my own before he latched onto them.

"I need you," he breathed, staring at me intensely. He brought our hands up and cupped my jaw before he pulled my mouth toward his. "Tell me I'm not delusional, baby; that the accident didn't cause you to distance yourself from me so much that you no longer feel the same and that all these months of therapy have been for nothing. There are so many dimensions of love. Tell me that you need me, and you'll never need another like you do me. That I'm it for you."

He didn't give me a chance to answer, and I only managed to nod just as our lips collided. Fuck, he tasted good, so warm and… _memorable_. It had been so long since he'd willingly let himself touch me like this—kissing me without any fear at all—and before I knew it, I found myself wrapped in his warmth, reveling in his touch.

I tangled my hands in his hair and pushed my body against his, determined to ignore the dull ache it caused inside me. After all this time, he still grounded me, still kept my feet planted on solid ground. I'd been blind to think I could go through life alone after feeling that steadiness, that incredible sense of belonging he gave me. He'd changed me irrevocably; trying to attempt an existence without his love was incredibly futile.

Rain fell down around us, saturating us—cleansing us. I tipped my head up to the sky and let it wash over my face, remembering how the moment I admitted my love for him, it had been raining down on us… just like it was now. Only now it wasn't the beginning of something new and unknown, it was a step back into the familiar, a final, long-awaited release of all the resentment and anger I'd let build up inside me for so many months.

Life wasn't perfect, and neither was that happy ending I'd strived for with him. But it was mine. _He_ was mine. I finally believed what the therapists and he had been trying to say all this time. It was just a shame it took me this long to figure it out.

"I was coming home," I said, smiling wryly at him.

He blinked once. "You were?"

I nodded. "I love you, Edward. I love the way you make me feel. How the air seems to buzz when we're together. How touching you," I skimmed my fingers along his jaw, feeling that spark ignite between us, "sends sparks straight to my heart. How this," I took his hands and placed them over my chest, directly over my heart, "beats only for you. You're it for me, Edward. There could never be anyone else who'll make me feel like you do. I've just been letting everything get in the way of that."

He grinned widely; his eyes shimmered with warmth as he realized I was reciting the very thing I told him on the side of the road in Forks, with just a few small changes to fit the circumstances.

"I could never change my mind about you," he whispered, bending down so that his lips brushed over mine. "I love you. You were somehow meant to be mine, just as I am meant to be yours…. I'd been waiting for you, Isabella. All my life, I'd waited for you."

I pulled his mouth to mine again and did everything I could to remember this new beginning. "And now you have me," I affirmed, feeling him smile against my skin.

"Completely."

* * *

**Oh, and Bella is the one to say that last line... **


	44. Chapter 44

**Thanks for the reviews and adds; I swear, I never expect to see as much as I do from this idea of mine. **

**Thanks to the awesome Beta Dude, Stratan, for surprising me with my chapter this morning. He's way too good to me. **

**I've said this before, but we're almost done. FOR CERTAIN this time. One more full-length chapter and one epilogue left. **

**There's a Twitter readalong scheduled for my other fic, While You Were Gone, on 11/26, if you're interested in joining in. Claireoth is the fantabulous host, and you can find me at (at)JennyB0719. I'll be unlocking my tweets for the occasion (I'm a stingy h00r).**

**Have a great Thanksgiving, if you celebrate it, and I'll see ya with two posts next Weds - Chapter 45 and a lemony outtake posting at Dirty Cheeky Monkey's.**

**

* * *

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Chapter 44

**Edward**

"Ready?" I asked, wrapping my arm around Bella's waist and leaning down to kiss her neck.

Everything was different since I'd come back from New York. That was the only way to describe it—different. There was no longer the heaviness that hung in the air around us; the sadness that had resided in Bella was gone. She was light… happy, and hopeful. I wasn't entirely sure what caused the sudden shift in her, but I knew that it happened that night at the Kodak Theatre. And for that, I'd forever be grateful to Jacob for knocking whatever sense into her that he was able to before I'd arrived.

God only knew how long I'd have fought to win her back if she'd actually made it to Forks.

"I'm…" She trailed off and glanced around the empty house. It was staged now, ready for strangers to come in and walk around and see it for what it was, rather than focusing in on the couple that once lived here. _We_ were nowhere to be found.

She carefully twisted so that she was facing me and smiled. "Yeah. I'm ready. I um, I think I got it all."

"You did," I responded with a crooked grin. "I checked."

She shook her head, smiling wider. "Right, well, you can stay here and baby me, and I'm going to go make sure the realtor stuck the sign out in the yard."

I made a face. "I wouldn't say I baby you…" Her brow arched. "All right, so maybe I do a little. Can you blame me? These last few months have been… hard."

She'd put me through so much trying to come to terms with everything that had happened. Perhaps I was a love struck fool, but I forgave her… for it all. It was never an option not to, just like not having her in my life was never an option. She'd shown me in the last couple of weeks how sorry she was in every small thing she did. She made me breakfast, came down to the gym to walk on the treadmill while I lifted weights. She made it a point to regain the normality in our life that we'd been missing lately.

She was making amends, even though I'd spent hours trying to tell her it was unnecessary. But, being Bella, she stubbornly refused to listen.

And it was bloody fantastic.

"I know," she sighed. "I-"

"I wasn't looking for an apology, baby, because there's nothing to be sorry for. You had to get through all your issues on your own. Though, I hope you're finished. If I have to chase you down again, I won't be pleased."

She giggled. "No chasing me down… unless you want to, that is," she said chewing on her lip nervously as she waited for my reaction.

I bit back a groan as I read the meaning behind her words, but it couldn't be yet. I may have been desperate to have my way with her again, but it couldn't be like this—rushed just before we left for England. Although, I did fancy one last go in the house before we left…

What the hell was I thinking? She wasn't ready. Christ,_ I_ wasn't ready yet, but I was working to regain that sense of normality as well, and that included touching her like I did before. Slowly, I was letting go of my fear of hurting her. Certain things I could do, like kissing her and holding her against me, but others… others I wasn't so sure about yet.

I acted like a virginal teenager again, rather than a thirty-nine year old man. It was infuriating.

"I'd love to chase you down and have my way with you, but unfortunately, we have a plane to catch," I answered, reassuring her by tipping her head back and trailing kisses over her neck.

She moaned, and then pouted in disappointment when I pulled away. If she only knew how that disappointment echoed with me, only it was with myself. I simply could not force myself to go any further.

"Can't we catch the next one?" she asked breathlessly.

"Afraid not. Samson'll be on that flight. There's no way I'm letting him sit in an airport for hours in that crate."

"Oh, shit. I didn't even think about that. Is he… I mean, he'll be okay, right?"

I smiled at her concern. "He's been sedated. He'll sleep his entire way over the Atlantic."

"Across the pond?" she teased.

"Look at you, learning the lingo." I lightly smacked her arse, startling her. She laughed a little, and I grinned back, satisfied that I'd been able to do something unexpected without hurting her.

"Now move it," I continued. "Carlisle and Esme will be waiting for us at the airport."

"That's so weird," she muttered to herself.

"What is?" I asked curiously as I started pulling our suitcases behind me.

"That they'll be there waiting for us. Everything's been so secretive until now."

"The accident put a lot of things in perspective for us," I told her. "You were more important than their anonymity."

She glanced away, blushing beautifully, and grabbed her carry on off of the counter. We walked out of the house, locking up behind us, and toward the car that was idling in the drive. The sign was in the yard; the house was ready for its first showing. I took one last look around and felt absolutely no remorse. I'd always loved this house, and so many things had happened with Bella here, but we needed this move to wipe the slate clean and start again. With everything going on in our lives, doubt had crept into my mind and made me wonder if we'd ever really move to London… if we'd find the happiness that once saturated everything around us.

It was probably absurd, but actually sitting in the back of a car with Bella and riding to the airport felt like we were one step closer to it. Every day, we were one step closer to being us again.

The driver pulled up to the terminal and opened Bella's door for her. She got out and lingered just beside it, waiting for me to join her. I got out and immediately grabbed hold of her hand, anticipating the mass of paparazzi that was likely waiting for us near the doors.

They didn't disappoint.

They swarmed around us as we took our luggage out of the trunk. Bella never let go of my hand and used her hair to shield her face, grumbling obscenities as she started to hitch her bag over her shoulder. I chuckled a little, which made her elbow me in the ribs and glare up at me.

"It's your fault," she said bitingly.

I laughed harder. "I know. They all love you too, though."

Her lip curled. "Don't remind me."

I pressed my lips together so that I didn't say any more and took her bag from her, causing her to look up at me questioningly. "I've got it," I said lowly.

"But…"

"Baby, I've got it."

She slowly turned to face me, her eyes flashing with annoyance. I couldn't help but grin. It was good to have her back. "I can do it myself."

"That doesn't mean I'll let you," I answered simply.

I knew she wanted to get angry, but she laughed instead. "When I said 'baby me' earlier, I wasn't being serious."

"I know," I said again.

She rolled her eyes. "I'm okay, Edward. I feel fine."

"I'm still carrying the bags."

She huffed as I led her to the check-in counter and got our suitcases checked and our boarding passes. We walked toward the security checkpoint, ignoring the paparazzi tailing us, and found a bit of a surprise waiting for us.

Bella immediately teared up as she spotted Emmett, Rosalie, Angela, Jacob, Renée and Riley all waiting for us. She hurried over to them, leaving me in her dust, and threw her arms around Rosalie and Angela simultaneously. I could hear them crying together as I walked over to them, and I immediately felt guilty for moving her away from her family and began wondering if this decision of ours was still the right thing to do. It had been made before everything went awry.

I looked away, unable to watch, and found myself practically falling over with the shove that came from Jacob.

I glowered at him and readjusted the bags on my shoulders. "Finished, dog?" I asked dryly.

He laughed. "You owe me."

"Which translates into you having the right to shove me whenever you want? I don't think so," I retorted.

"No, I shoved you because you had that stupid, guilty look on your face again. Get a grip, dude. You're moving with her, not kidnapping her and hiding her in a basement somewhere."

"Sod off, will you?"

Bella broke away from Rosalie and Angela, wiping her eyes and saying a few words to Emmett and Jacob. I said my own goodbyes as she spoke to Renée, and then went over to join her.

She took Riley and held him in her arms, kissing his forehead and breathing in deeply. She spoke softly to him, tilting her head back as he reached for her hair and laughed. Eventually, I managed to stop staring in shock and wrapped my arm around her, closing my eyes for a moment when she laid her head on my shoulder.

"I'm finally getting to like this kid, and now we're leaving," she sighed.

I didn't know how to respond, so I simply reached out and let Riley grab at my finger.

"It's going to be worth it, right?" Bella asked anxiously. "It's going to be worth leaving everyone here?"

I still was at a loss, so I stammered my reply, "I… erm, I hope so. I mean, I think it will be… I-"

She laughed at me and reached up to run her fingers through my hair. "I'm sorry. I kind of put you on the spot there."

I shrugged. "I'm not as sure as I once was about it. Things aren't the same as they were when we made this decision."

"I still want it," she said. "I still want to go to Oxford and live in that apartment with you. I'm just going to miss everyone and our life here in LA, that's all."

"Then it'll be worth it," I responded. "We'll make it so."

* * *

"Wait, where do you want to put this one?" Bella asked, giggling as she held up the massive white platter she'd just unwrapped. Thank God we were nearly done with unpacking. Two weeks of living out of boxes had nearly driven me mad.

"I don't bloody know," I replied, scanning the kitchen and trying to think of where an empty spot was in the cupboards. "We brought entirely too much shit with us."

Her giggles turned into full-blown laughter, and before I knew it, she was doubled over herself, laughing hysterically.

"Give me that glass," I chuckled, snatching the rest of her wine away from her and gulping it down. "Mixing alcohol with your medication was obviously a terrible idea."

"Edward," she whined. "It's good wine. Your mom buys some awesome shit."

"What's the proof on this?" I mumbled, holding the bottle up to my face so I could read it. "I can't focus without my glasses."

"You're drunk too," she said, laughing more.

"I'm not," I argued. "I'm old, remember?"

She snorted and fell back onto the couch. "Oh, yeah," she snickered. "I forgot."

I put everything down on the counter and walked over to where she sat. She looked amazing in her tiny plaid shorts and her hair piled high on her head. Her cheeks were flushed from the alcohol coursing through her veins, and her eyes were heavy with sleep. Jet lag was affecting the both of us.

I sat down and ran the pad of my thumb over one of the shadows forming under her eyes. "You need rest," I murmured.

"We need to unpack," she countered.

"We've time."

She scooted closer to me and threw her leg over my hip. Her body was warm against mine, inviting. Her nipples peeked out of the thin, white fabric of her tank top, and I couldn't help but let my hand skim over them. They pebbled with the movement, and Bella's eyes instantly closed as she pushed herself even closer to me.

"Baby," she breathed, rolling her hips against me. "I miss you."

"Oh, God," I moaned as her body brushed against mine, coming undone with her words.

I grabbed the tank top and jerked it over her head, letting my eyes and hands roam over her body, remembering how she felt against me, how her skin felt beneath my fingers…

I moved to her stomach, and her hands instantly reached for mine, pushing them away. I glanced up at her face and saw how self-conscious she was of her scars and smiled.

"You're beautiful. Every part of you," I reassured her.

"They're hideous."

I shook my head and laced our fingers together, bringing our hands up over her head as I bent to kiss each and every scar on her abdomen. Slow and steady, I trailed my mouth over her, feeling the tension in her body dissipate with every kiss and stroke of my tongue. Soon she was pliant beneath me, just as I'd always loved it.

"Beautiful," I repeated, letting go of her hands so that I could pull her shorts and knickers down and reach more of her.

She tugged at my shirt urgently. "This needs to come off. Now," she groaned as I stroked her.

In an instant, she had my shirt balled up in her hands and threw it across the room. She brought her hands back down and let them skim over my shoulders and down my back, eliciting chills from me.

Perhaps it was the alcohol, but there was no longer anything stopping me. The only thing I could think about was watching her writhe as she came and feeling that connection with her once again.

With that thought, I suddenly scooped her up in my arms and kissed her surprised face. "Bedroom," I rasped against her lips.

She wrapped her arms around my neck, securing me to her as I tried to make my way through the scattered boxes in the flat. I stubbed my toe as I reached the corridor and cursed loudly, causing her to finally break away from me and laugh at my blunder.

"Not funny," I growled. "I can't live like this anymore. I'm going insane."

"It is a little," she giggled.

I laughed with her and shook my head as we entered the bedroom. "Absolutely not."

I laid her down and watched her naked body scoot back toward the headboard. It was like our first time all over again, the nerves, the need. Every part of her captivated me.

"Nuh-uh," she said, stopping me from getting on the bed instantly. "Take off your pants first."

I complied immediately, stepping out of my trousers as they pooled at my feet, and then crawled onto the bed. I reached for her, letting my finger trail down her sex achingly slow until her hips finally bucked up against it.

I cocked my brow with the movement. "Easy, love." Now that we were so close, I was beginning to question myself. I couldn't help but wonder if it was too soon…

"Don't do that," she moaned, taking my hand and moving it with hers. "Don't over think it."

"I don't want to hurt you," I admitted, allowing myself to hover on top of her. Our hands never stopped, and the feel of her wet and ready was enough to nearly blind me. It'd been so long… I wasn't sure I'd be able to last.

"You won't."

"Tell me if I do something wrong. I want to try, but if I get carried away-"

She cut me off with a kiss. It was heady and demanding, mind-erasing. And if that wasn't enough, she took her hand away from mine and wrapped it around me, stroking me once before leading me to her.

I groaned and hitched her leg around my hip, watching her reaction carefully as I slid inside her. Her eyes fluttered closed as I stilled, trying to regain control because it was so…

"Fucking good," I ground out, pulling back and slowly thrusting into her once more.

I held my weight off of her as much as I could and continued the slow pace, watching her, waiting to make a wrong move and hurt her. I grabbed at the pillows beside her head and tugged on them, funneling the need to drive harder and faster into her somewhere else.

I let her sounds guide me, grunting with every unhurried push into her until she started to finally clench up around me. Her nails dug into my back as they descended to my hips, speeding up my movements as she neared climax.

Jesus, I didn't want to hurt her. If I hurt her, I'd never be able to make love to her again, and…

The sound and feel of her coming was enough to stop my inner rambling. I kissed her, drowning out the sound of my own orgasm as I drove into her one last time. I wanted to stay like this. I wanted to continue kissing her and feeling her lying beneath me, but I needed to move off of her.

I went to lie beside her, taking her in my arms and unconsciously massaging her hip as she snuggled up to me. She kissed my chest and exhaled loudly, causing me to panic.

"I shouldn't have… This was a mistake. God, you're hurt. I knew it."

"Shut the fuck up," she laughed. "I'm fine. Just exhausted. That was really good," she finished quietly.

I took her chin in my hands and tipped her head up so I could see her. Her face was red from exertion and the blush that was currently blooming across her cheeks. "You're sure?"

She nodded. "If it wasn't good for you, it's okay. It's been a while."

I laughed at the sheer absurdity of that. "Believe me, love, even though I was worried sick about hurting you, it was good."

Her lips twitched. "Okay, then."

"I love you, Bella. I missed you," I said, reiterating her statement from earlier.

"I love you, too. I'd say London's off to a smashing start, don't you?" she asked, doing the worst impression of my accent I'd ever heard.

I chuckled and kissed her nose. "That was horrible," I said, hurrying to finish my sentence when she opened her mouth to protest, "but you're right. It's been perfect."

* * *

**Bella**

I breezed past the doorman and into the apartment building, not bothering with pleasantries as I made my way through the lobby. I went down the hall and to our door, fumbling with the keys for a few seconds before I finally unlocked the damn thing and went inside.

As soon as the door shut behind me, I leaned back against it and closed my eyes. Samson was at my side in an instant, panting in excitement with my arrival. I gave him a quick pat and a smile, but that was all I could do. I was practically frozen stiff.

"Love?" Edward called out from the study. "How were your classes?"

"Fucking horrible," I complained, forcing myself to move and take off my gloves, scarf, hat, and coat and throwing them all on the couch. I shivered once and headed toward the kitchen to make some tea.

In the short time here, I'd become addicted to the stuff. It was an annoyance at first, but as the weather got colder, so did my LA-adjusted body. Tea was a quick way to warm myself back up, and thankfully, there were enough flavors and different kinds that I wasn't getting sick of it… yet.

But the biscuits and shit? Yeah, I still wasn't enjoying that part of England. All those sweets…

"I got lost on the way to like, every single one of my fucking classes," I continued, banging through the kitchen. "My stupid professor for my first class wouldn't let me stay because I was late, even though I tried to explain to him that I had a physical issue that limited my stupid ass brain from remembering things. So I had to wait for my next class to start in the library. And you'd have thought I'd have been able to make it on time since I wasn't rushing from one building to the next, but no. I was fucking late then, too. That was okay, but the next class, there was a pop quiz and I couldn't remember any of the material. It was just… one thing after another."

I filled the kettle with water and put it on the stove to boil. "Oh," I said, suddenly remembering this awful girl in my last class, "I'm stuck being partners with this… this… bitch of a girl who thinks she's-"

I cut myself off as I saw Alistair and Peter standing in the hallway, holding bottles of beer and smirking at me.

"Ah, hell. Why didn't you tell me we had company before you let me make an ass of myself?" I shouted, waiting for Edward to finally make an appearance.

"How was I to get a word in? You just kept talking and talking," Edward laughed, squeezing past them and heading toward me.

I started rummaging through the cabinet, trying to decide which kind of tea to try next.

Edward reached up into the cabinet and pulled some out for me. "Chamomile," he murmured, brushing his lips over my ear. "It's soothing. Seems you could use something to settle you down."

"Probably," I said shakily, gripping onto the counter so that I didn't fall over. It'd only been a few days since the drunken sex while unpacking, and now every little thing he did had me wanting him to throw me over his shoulder and take me to the bedroom for a quick romp between the sheets. It was like my body was trying to make up for lost time, which sucked because we_ had_ no time right now.

"You're cold," he said, running his hands over my arms. "How long do you think it'll take you to adjust to the weather?"

_How long do you think it'll take for Alistair and Peter to leave so I can drag you into the bedroom?_

"A year?" I guessed jokingly, leaning into him. Fuck, you could feel the sexual tension building in the room, slowly weaving between us and demanding to be noticed.

A throat cleared in the background, causing Edward to practically jump away from me. He ran his hand through his hair and grinned sheepishly.

"Sorry, mate," he said, walking to the fridge and grabbing another beer.

"I think we should go. It looks like the two of you need to shag. Now," Alistair said with a laugh.

"Don't be ridiculous," Edward snapped back. "Shut your mouth and turn on the bloody football game." He glanced over at me. "You don't mind, do you, baby?"

"Uh, no. It's fine. I'll just make my tea and go study until I have to leave for my therapy session," I said softly, glancing over at Alistair and Peter, who were both busying themselves with the TV in the living room.

"You're sure you don't want me to come with you?" Edward asked as he opened the beer.

"Nah. You stay here and have fun."

The kettle started whistling, and I flashed a quick smile as I went to take the kettle off of the stove. I let the tea steep while I grabbed my bag off of the floor behind the couch, and then took it all with me to the bedroom, leaving Edward standing there, looking absolutely torn.

"I'll be out in a little bit. Don't fuck up my house," I teased, hoping to keep him from going insane with worry. I was fine. I could handle meeting a new therapist on my own. It'd been a few weeks since I'd last been, and while I was doing all right, I didn't want to press my luck.

Things were going amazingly well for us. To ruin it because I just up and stopped going to therapy was something I wasn't going to let happen.

"Come on, Sam."

"You're taking my dog?" Edward asked with a laugh.

"I'm taking your dog."

I studied as much as I could before I had to leave again. I put everything away and grabbed my long since emptied pot and cup and took them to the kitchen, stopping when I noticed that the TV was turned off and Edward was sitting at the table with a book in his hands.

He looked up at me from behind his glasses and smiled. "I was wondering when you'd finish."

I blinked rapidly and looked around again. "Where'd they go?"

"Down to the pub to finish the game there," he said, getting up. "We should go so you're not late."

"Edward…"

"This is important. Football and beer can wait."

A wave of relief came over me. I hadn't realized how much I actually needed him there with me today. "Thanks."

He nodded, and I went to put the dirty dishes in the sink before meeting up with him by the door and getting all bundled up again. I pulled my hat over my hair and looked over at him, frowning as I noticed that he only had his coat on.

"Seriously? That's all you need?"

He flashed a smile. "Not quite." He reached over and grabbed a black umbrella out of the stand. "Now I think I've got it all."

"God, you suck."

"Erm, no. No, I don't," he said, curling his lip up in distaste.

"Ha, ha. You know what I meant."

I was feeling pretty good, so we decided to walk the short distance to the therapist's office. Edward pointed out a few landmarks and the shops and pubs he loved on our way there. Every time, it was some place new, and it was one my favorite things about moving to London with him, like the normalcy—regardless of the paparazzi that constantly trailed us—our lives had finally started to take on. Getting to read the Sunday papers in a pub or walk down the corner to the little grocery store and pick up dinner were things I looked forward to. They were routine; they were ours.

It wasn't long before Edward was opening a door to an old, brick building and leading me up a flight of stairs. We didn't have to wait long before introductions were made and we were shown around the office. Then, I had to go into my new therapist's office with her and actually _talk_.

It was an easy session, both of us getting acquainted with one another before I gave her a summary of everything that had happened. For the first time, I didn't get teary-eyed when I started talking about my brother or all the complications that had stemmed from the accident. I wasn't sure what it meant, but it felt amazing not to feel as sad when I thought about it. It didn't mean that the feeling was completely gone, but it was a vast improvement on the way I'd felt a month ago. _Everything_ was better than it had been a month ago.

And that was all I could ask for.

* * *

Before Edward and I knew it, it was spring, and I was on break from school for the Easter holiday. We'd settled into our apartment; we'd celebrated our first anniversary. I found that once I worked through my memory issues, I loved Oxford, just like I'd hoped I would.

The movie Edward had signed up for so long ago was scheduled to start filming soon, and we both finally knew why Alice had pushed for him to do it. Yes, it was an incredible script and the so-called role of a lifetime, but it was more than that for us. It was a sort of redemption from all the negativity that had surrounded us for so long. It had been almost a year since the accident. All this time, the effort we'd both put into our relationship and ourselves, had helped us finally get to where we were before. The making of this movie just solidified it. Neither of us wanted to get back into that way of life, but knowing that we could do it, without any kind of fallout or fear while doing so, made it that much more gratifying.

Today was the first day I was able to do nothing since I'd moved here. My plan was to lie around on the couch and watch horrible TV all day, but Esme had surprised me by stopping by the apartment and offering to take me to lunch before a walk through the park just a few blocks away. Or so I thought. I'd expected to walk down the street to one of the restaurants she loved so much, but instead, I found myself standing on the sidewalk, staring up at a massive sign on the side of the building in horror.

"Yoga?" I shouted. "Are you crazy?"

Didn't she know me at all?

Esme laughed and guided me through the door. "No, I don't believe so. I just thought we could spend some time together. I'm old and could use the exercise, as could you. I know you walk every day, but you need something more to keep yourself flexible and centered. It's also a great way to calm yourself."

"You sound like my mother."

"Well, she's right in this instance. How is she?"

"Fine," I answered. They all were. Emmett and Rosalie had finally gotten engaged. Riley was walking and had just said his first word—"shoe". Angela had gotten an HR position at one of the many record companies in LA, determined to stay close to Ben. Alice was a nightmare trying to finish planning the wedding, which Edward and I got a good laugh from nearly every day. And my dad… He was actually dating again.

Even though I was happy here in England with Edward, they were still an intrinsic part of my life. They were just as important to me as they'd always been, and I spent thousands of hours logging into our Skype account to see their faces as often as I could.

I glanced around and noticed that the entire place was buzzing with women in tight black pants and ponytails, all lean and limber and incredibly graceful-looking—the complete opposite of me. There was no way that I was going to try to balance on my head and contort my body in a hundred different ways in front of all of these people. I'd fall. I'd make a complete fucking idiot out of myself, and the proof—the pictures—would make front-page news.

This was such a bad idea.

A tiny girl with short brown hair walked past me with a blue mat rolled up under her arm and disappeared into one of the classrooms to the left. I didn't have one of those. It was the perfect excuse to leave.

"I don't have a mat," I blurted. I wasn't sure why I was dreading this so much; I just was.

"I have two in my bag." Esme reached into the giant green bag that hung off her shoulder and pulled out a gray mat. "Or they have some you can use if you'd rather."

"Of course," I muttered.

She smiled. "Come on. Class will start soon. I'll even set us up in the back of the room, all right?"

I made some kind of distressed sound and followed her inside.

"Don't we have to sign in or something?" I asked, taking off my socks and shoes and slipping them in the bag with Esme's.

"Already taken care of." She handed me my yoga mat. "Ready?'

"No."

"Why are you being so ridiculous about this?" she asked, walking to an empty place on the floor, just big enough for us, and rolling out her mat.

I shrugged and followed her lead. "You do this a lot?"

"Three times a week," she replied, sitting on the floor and crossing her legs.

"Damn it," I cursed under my breath and joined her.

Class soon started after that. I spent thirty minutes trying to figure it all out, like how not to fall over while attempting Tree—because I almost did three times—and how Plow and Plank poses were too hard on my hips. It was uncomfortable and at times, pretty damn painful. I'd be sore as hell in the morning, but I loved the challenge it gave me and knew that I'd be back for more.

Renée was going to flip when I told her about this.

I moved to Downward Facing Dog position and sighed contentedly, hearing a little laugh come from Esme as I did.

I peeked over at her and shook my head. "Yes, I like it. Happy?" I whispered.

"Incredibly," she whispered back. We shifted to another position. "So Edward tells me you two have gone to a few fertility specialists."

I nearly collapsed on the floor in shock. No wonder I'd been dreading this. It wasn't because of yoga at all. It was of getting cornered by my mother-in-law so she could get information about the broken baby factory of mine.

"He what?" I hissed. "You sneaky little-"

"What were the results?" she asked, interrupting me.

I groaned under my breath and shifted into yet another position. "The same. They can try a surgery to correct the damage, but they can't guarantee anything. My uterus could still rupture if we got pregnant. It's… impossible," I said in resignation. "None of them would come right out and say it, but it's just not happening."

"I'm so sorry," she said softly.

"Don't be. We have other options." Options I was finally willing to explore.

"You do. Will you be making another trip back to one of these fertility specialists to talk about surrogacy?"

I shook my head and finally stopped trying to keep up with the rest of the class, sitting down on my mat and crossing my legs again. "I… don't think so."

She nodded. "I'll leave it alone. I know you don't like to talk about it."

"No, it's okay. I don't mind like I used to."

"That's good," she said, breaking long enough to say "Namaste" with the rest of the class before continuing. "So will you come with me again on Monday?"

"Yeah. I'll come with you on Monday," I grumbled, "so long as you promise not to sneak around. It's unbecoming."

She laughed. "Very well. I promise."

We headed over to where her bag was, getting our socks and shoes out and putting our mats back in their place. We quickly put them back on and started toward the exit, passing the nursery as we did.

A little girl with curly blonde hair came rushing over to the woman beside me, latching onto her leg and peering up at me shyly.

I gave her a little wave and a smile as I passed, feeling that sense of readiness again as I did. She waved back, and then started jabbering about all the toys she'd played with in the nursery to her mother.

I wanted that. I wanted to have the tiny hands grabbing at my leg, listen to the gibberish, and watch my child's face light up with excitement. However it was meant to happen for us, I wanted it. It was as simple as that.

Esme hovered at the door, watching me closely. "Are you all right, darling?" she asked, glancing between the little girl and me.

"I'm good. I promise."

We walked back outside, and I waited until we'd gotten half a block away before speaking again.

"I just need the name of an adoption lawyer," I said nonchalantly, giggling as Esme's steps faltered.

"You what?"

"You can't tell Edward, though. I want it to be a surprise."

"All right."

"And I… I wanted to know how the adoption process works. I have a vague idea, but you're the only person I know that's been through it…"

"It was so long ago. It's likely that it's completely different now. I can tell you what Carlisle and I went through, though."

"That would be great," I said sincerely. "Thank you."

"I should be the one thanking you," she replied. "It's all I can do not to start jumping with joy."

"By all means, don't let me stop you," I replied.

"A grandbaby." She beamed over at me. "My God, I can't wait."


	45. Chapter 45

**Thanks to Stratan for the beta... I'm stupid with love for my beta, guys. As usual.**

**This is it, only the epilogue remains.**

**Epic A/N at the bottom.**

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* * *

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Chapter 45

**Edward**

The click of the front door pulled my attention from the script in my hands and back to reality. I'd been so focused on memorizing my lines, I hadn't even noticed the time. Samson jumped up from where he'd been lying and barked as he made his way to the front door, causing Bella to call out his name happily as she shuffled through the living room. I glanced down at my watch and frowned.

She was two hours late.

Every day for the last week, she'd gotten home from Oxford later and later, always using some excuse about a project, yet I never saw her working on it outside of "the library"—which she always did. She was always determined to do well, regardless of her memory issue, so it was never unusual to see her bent over a book or her laptop at all hours of the day with hundreds of papers scattered around her.

This week, however, I hadn't seen her study much at all.

I trusted Bella completely, but I needed to know why she'd been lying so unconvincingly for so many days now. It was unlike her to keep secrets from me. Honesty was one of the few things we'd promised to each other from the very beginning, and for her to go back on her word was a little worrisome. It had my mind racing with possible scenarios, the worst being of her distancing herself from everyone like she'd done before.

And I was fairly certain that I couldn't go through that again.

I sighed and ripped my glasses off of my face, listening to Samson bark while Bella played around with him and wondering if she'd take time to compose herself and practice her excuse for this evening, or if she'd come to find me immediately. It didn't matter; I was going to find out what was going on tonight, force the reason out of her if I had to.

Bella began clanking around in the kitchen, humming some cheerful tune as she did. The sound of something sizzling on the stove soon followed, and I found myself getting up out of the chair and walking to where she was causing the commotion. If she was pulling away from everyone again, this was new. She was always silent and introverted before. To have her sounding so content was a bit puzzling.

_You might be wrong, Edward,_ I thought to myself as I walked through the corridor. I wanted nothing more than to be wrong.

"Hi!" she exclaimed as soon as she saw me. She had two glasses of white wine sitting on the counter in front of where she was chopping an onion.

"Hi," I said cautiously as I closed the distance between us.

She pushed one glass toward me and grinned. "How was your day?"

I shrugged and took a sip, arching my brow as I recognized it as one of my favorites. She glanced away, busying herself with the bag that sat beside her so I couldn't see her face, but I did anyway.

She was fighting a smile.

"A bit boring," I admitted, even more confused by her behavior. "I spent the majority of the day trying to memorize my lines."

"Need any help?"

"From you?" I nearly laughed. She was the worst actress I'd ever met. "No, thank you."

She pouted, "I'm not that bad, baby."

I took another sip of wine so I didn't have to answer that.

"What's all this for?" I asked, motioning to the enormous spread of food. We cooked together every night, but it was always something quick and easy. I couldn't remember the last time we had anything this elaborate.

"I finished that project I was telling you about."

This was good. Extremely good. "Oh?" I asked, not bothering to hide how happy that made me. "When will it be graded?"

"Tonight." She chewed on her lip and blushed slightly, causing me to instantly realize that there was more to this little project than she'd been letting on.

"Bella? What's going on?"

"Just… Let's make dinner. Please? I have it all planned out. Don't ruin the surprise."

"Surprise?"

She focused on chopping the onion again. "Mm-hmm."

"Bella, I-" I ran my hand through my hair and took a deep breath. "I'm beginning to panic a little. It's really a surprise? You're not, erm…" I stared at her face and realized how ridiculous I was being. She was perfectly fine. "Never mind."

Her jaw dropped. "Oh, my God. You've been freaking out, haven't you?"

I gave her a sheepish look. "Can you blame me?"

"Shit." She threw the knife down on the counter and rushed over to her bag. "I should've known. It was such a stupid idea," she grumbled to herself as she pulled out a thick, manila envelope and hurried over to me.

"What's this?" I asked, taking the envelope from her.

"My surprise. I should've just told you from the beginning. I never even thought-"

I put my fingers over her mouth, cutting her off. "Will I like this 'surprise' of yours?"

I pulled my hand back. The smile on her face was infectious, joyful. "Oh, yeah. Definitely."

I chuckled and put the envelope down on the counter. "Then I can wait. What do you want me to do?"

"You're sure?"

I nodded. "Go about this as you planned. Don't let me ruin it."

"Um, okay," she replied uncertainly, glancing around. "Peel the potatoes and chop the vegetables?"

"You gave me the worst job, didn't you?"

"Maybe," she said with a smirk.

I rolled my eyes but got a knife out of the block without commenting. We worked side by side, eventually turning some music on as we cooked. We sang along to whatever played on the radio and laughed when one of us fumbled the lyrics. I turned my mobile off when Bella wasn't looking, suddenly wanting to just spend an evening—the first since our anniversary—with just her and no outside interruptions.

When the chicken, potatoes, and vegetables were all roasting in the oven, I took Bella in my arms and started dancing with her, grinning crookedly at her reaction.

"What, you don't want to dance with your husband?"

"It's just so cheesy," she argued.

I spun her around, careful not to contort her body too much, and smiled when she threw her head back and laughed. "It's romantic, is it not? I thought this was what women wanted."

"You care what women want?"

"I care what you want," I said as I bent to kiss her.

"That's more like it," she breathed, licking her lips.

The moment our lips collided, she moaned softly and brought me closer to her. Her back hit the cupboards, and I lifted her up so that she was sitting on the counter and situated myself between her legs. We had just enough time to fool around before dinner was ready.

"Fuck it," she said, breaking away from me and reaching out for the envelope. "You should know now."

"What?" I murmured against her skin, working my mouth over her jaw and to her neck. My hand found its way under her shirt and slowly traveled upward, causing her to gasp as soon as I cupped her breast.

"Yep. Fuck it. I don't want to stop, and I'm pretty sure that when you see what's inside, you won't be able to, either."

I groaned and stepped away from her, pushing my hair back and closing my eyes so I could compose myself. "Really? You're stopping me? Didn't you have some ridiculous scheme worked up?"

She nodded and took a steadying breath as she handed me the envelope. "It doesn't matter. You should know now," she repeated.

I pulled out the adoption applications that were inside and stared at them in disbelief. I laughed, "Are you-? I…" I could barely speak with how bloody elated I was. It was what I'd wanted with her, been denied for so long, and now…

"I don't need to call an ambulance, do I?" she joked. "The ticker's still okay?"

"No, no ambulance." Christ, I loved this woman. "How long have you been thinking about this?"

She shrugged. "A month, maybe? So I asked Esme to give me an idea of what we needed to do and looked up adoptions lawyers. That's what I've been doing all week."

"This is where you've been every night after class? What you've been hiding?"

"Yeah. I was either talking to Esme or meeting with a lawyer. We can get a different one if you don't like him. That's not a big deal," she said awkwardly. "I just want a baby with you. I don't care how it happens anymore."

I let the papers fall to the floor and jerked her to me. "It is a big deal," I said, kissing her feverishly. "Jesus, Bella, I didn't know if you'd ever want this after…"

She met my gaze and smiled. "I've been thinking of our options lately," she answered as she fumbled with the buttons on my shirt. "And I can't explain it. I just feel like this is what we're supposed to do first."

"Adopt?"

"Yeah. A little redheaded baby would be nice too, but I keep thinking about Alice… and you. Your lives are better because of Carlisle and Esme. I want to be a part of that."

With those words, I turned every single appliance in the kitchen off. Dinner could wait. Bella—this—was more important to me than anything else, and I fully intended to spend the entire night showing her how much this meant to me.

We were going to celebrate.

* * *

I eventually learned all that Bella had in the last week, and how difficult and tedious this entire process could end up being. Ideally, I was too old; Bella was too young. Her psychological history and possible physical "limitation" caused a bit of a snag, but the fact that I was nearly retired and could provide a child with a stable home helped negate that. We did all we were instructed to do to make sure that when we finally submitted the applications—which had been enthusiastically filled out the night she gave them to me—we'd be approved in the least amount of time possible.

The day we received our first phone call from the woman who would eventually be _our_ social worker was thrilling, but our joy was quickly overshadowed by the realization that we were far from finished. Home studies and assessments of our friends and family still had to be done before we could finally get the approval we wanted so badly.

And when that day came, we still had to be "matched" with a child. We'd applied with a wide age range of children we were willing to adopt, in countries all around the world, hoping that it would help reduce the time that we spent on the wait list.

But that wait was still excruciating.

Bella had a two-week break before summer classes began, so we decided to try to distance ourselves from the situation and take a little holiday. We went to Kent for a week to relax, and then flew back to LA for the first time since we'd moved to visit Bella's parents, Emmett and Rosalie, and Angela and Ben. It was a bit surreal, coming back to the States. We were coming back healthier and happier than when we'd left.

As soon as we arrived at the Malibu house, we opened all the windows to let some of the stagnant air out and the sea breeze in. I took our suitcases up to our bedroom and let Bella reacquaint herself with the house since she'd not spent much time here to begin with, while I unpacked them and the few boxes that had been sent here when we moved.

I finished and found her sitting on the beach, staring out at the deep blue water with a scowl from the sun shining in her eyes. Her hair whipped around her face with the sudden gust of wind, and I laughed as she sputtered and spit it out of her mouth.

"Need these?" I asked, handing her a hair tie and a pair of her sunglasses.

"How did you know?" she asked. She took them from me and started pulling her hair back.

I shrugged. "Weather channel."

She shook her head and stared back out at the ocean. "I like this color blue, don't you?"

"It's beautiful," I agreed. "Sort of like a turquoise color, yes?"

"If the sun hits it right. I miss it, you know. London's great, but I miss the beach."

"So do I."

She glanced over at me hopefully. "You do?"

"Of course I do. I spent years living with the beach just minutes away from me, no matter what part of LA I was in. How could I not miss it?"

"Maybe we could do the baby's room that color," she said, leaning against me. "I don't know… Bring a piece of LA back home with us."

"What if it's not a baby?"

"It's a baby," she answered. "I don't know why, but I have a feeling we're getting a baby."

"Know the sex, too, Alice?" I teased.

"No," she laughed. "Maybe you could let her tell me that much, though?"

"I don't think so. I'd rather be surprised. I want my bloody sister to stay out of this."

She pursed her lips but tightened her hold around me. "Fine. It's kind of hot out here. I must be getting used to the shitty London weather."

"It's not shitty. It's mild."

"Sure thing, babe," she said sarcastically.

I chuckled and kissed the top of her hair. "We should start getting ready. We're to meet everyone in a couple of hours…"

"Just a little longer. I'm not ready to leave the beach yet."

"Bella, we'll be here for five more days. You've plenty of time to see the beach. We can even take a swim if you want."

She sighed and moved to get up. "Yeah, yeah. Take away all my fun."

Dinner was… interesting, to say the least. It was the first time since Bella had been in the hospital that Charlie and Renée had been around each other, which wasn't really a problem except for the fact that Charlie had flown down from Forks with his new girlfriend, Sue Clearwater, and her children, Leah and Seth. Bella took to Seth immediately… Leah, however, was a completely different story. They clashed from the first "hello", and Rosalie and Angela wound up dragging her to the neighboring bar in order to have some "girl time" and keep the peace. Only I couldn't give her said "girl time" because I was too paranoid to let her get pissed… in this place… with these people. The last time had been disastrous.

"Lighten up," she yelled from the spot where she was dancing with Rosalie. "I get to live with the prospect of that bitch in there being my step-sister some day, and I'm still having fun."

"She may not."

"Yeah, right," she snorted. "It's Charlie." Sweat dripped down her neck and in between her breasts. I followed one of the clear droplets as it descended, making her laugh. "Eyes up here, baby. We're not at home."

"And I care?" There weren't as many picture-snapping spectators as there once had been. I could very nearly do what I pleased with her.

She laughed again. "Well, in that case…" She grabbed my hands and pulled me up onto the dance floor with her. "Girl time's over. Emmett, go grope your fiancée in the corner or something."

Emmett grinned widely and leapt out of his seat. "Fuck that. I'll just take her home."

Bella rolled her eyes and threw her arms around my neck. She let her hands trace over my chest as she twisted in my arms, coming up and suddenly hissing in between her teeth as she twisted just a bit too far.

"You all right?" I asked anxiously.

"Well, I can't do that again," she responded. "Damn, that didn't feel too good."

"We should go home," I said worriedly as I pulled her away from the dance floor. The last thing I wanted her to do was injure herself with pissed dancing.

"Edward," she protested. "I'm fine."

"I'm not. I love watching you have fun, but I keep wondering if something will happen or if you'll hurt yourself. You almost did, and I-"

She stopped me from talking further with a kiss. It was heady and full of passion, causing me to fist her shirt in my hands and groan at the taste of her.

"Better now?"

I shifted on my feet, wanting to adjust myself. "Not particularly."

"Still want to go home?"

"More now than before," I replied honestly.

She grinned. "For this reason, I can go. The other one? Absolutely not. You've got to stop worrying so much."

"I can't help it. You're the most important thing in my life. It seems fitting that I wouldn't want something to happen to you-"

"Again," she finished.

"Yes, again. Now stop arguing with me and just go. Please," I added for good measure.

We said our goodbyes and headed back toward the house. The drive seemed to take forever, simply because all I wanted to do was stop everything and make love to Bella before we both passed out from exhaustion. After all, it was nine am back home.

I parked the Aston Martin in the garage and felt my mobile vibrate once in my pocket, indicating that I had an email. I got out and went to Bella's side, pulling up the email from the social worker and nearly dropping the phone when I saw the picture staring back at me.

"Baby," I said, glancing over at her excitedly. "Look."

She knit her brows and came to my side. I held the phone so that she could see the picture of the blonde haired, blue-eyed baby that was toothlessly grinning back at us. We'd finally been matched with a four-month-old little girl from Russia, and she was the most beautiful thing—her soon-to-be mother aside—that I'd ever seen in my life.

Her hand came up to her mouth, and her eyes filled with tears. "Oh, my God," she whispered in awe. "That's our baby. That's our daughter."

* * *

**Bella**

I got out of the car and stared up at the massive, brick building in front of me that stood in the outskirts of Moscow. This building had housed my daughter for the last five months, from the moment her biological mother had decided that she couldn't take care of her and gave her away. Now that I was so close to it, all I wanted to do was take off at a dead sprint and bring her back home with us. Her room was ready; we were ready. We had diapers, bottles, baby food, and toys stockpiled throughout the apartment. Now, we were just going through the motions so that we could _legally_ claim her as ours.

"What if the judge says no?" I whispered as Edward walked over to me. To come this far, only to have a Russian judge tell us we couldn't have her would be unbearable.

"Unless one of the family members comes in and claims they'd like to have her, that's not going to happen," he said resolutely. "And we've been assured that no one wants her."

"But she's theirs-" How could they not want that beautiful little girl?

"She's ours," he said emphatically, wrapping his arms around me and drawing me to him. "Where did all this doubt come from?"

"I'm scared," I admitted with a shrug. "I'm starting to think of myself as a mom to someone I've never met, and to come this close and have it all taken away… What is that going to do to me?"

"It's not going to happen." He glanced up at the sound of the translator's car coming up the drive. "Ready?"

I took a deep breath and watched the front door open. A tiny woman with graying, brown hair came out holding a baby on her hip. It was _my_ baby. And suddenly, Edward's hands were no longer calming and grounding; they were restraints. It was all I could do not to run up to that porch and snatch her out of her arms and never let her go.

The translator got out of his car and finally walked over to us, mumbling something to Edward in his thick, Russian accent, but I was too preoccupied to decipher the conversation. My eyes were trained on the baby staring back at me, watching me—waiting.

"It's like she knows," I said in amazement. "She knows we're here for her."

Edward chuckled. "Then I suppose you shouldn't make her wait, baby."

The second he let go of me, I moved toward her. It was like something was pulling me to her; gravity, maybe, like she and her father both were now the centers of my world. The feeling was indescribable. All I knew was that nothing—not a natural disaster and certainly not some strange man passing judgment on us—could keep me from her now.

I walked up onto the porch, slowing my steps since there was such a huge language barrier between the woman and me, and the translator was still quite a ways back with Edward. I didn't want this woman to think I was a kidnapper or something, which was kind of what I felt like with this need to just lay my hands on her.

"Mrs. Masen?" she asked brokenly with a hopeful smile.

I nodded eagerly, praying that she'd hand over the baby. I needed to know she was really here, that it wasn't just a dream. Being here felt illusory, and I was just waiting for the moment that reality jerked this moment away from me and dropped me back in my bedroom in London again. There'd been a time that I'd finally let go of all my doubts and had everything in my world change. It wouldn't surprise me to have it happen again.

And then, without any hesitance at all, she handed her over to me. She was heavier than I'd expected, soft, and warm. Her bright blue eyes stared up at me curiously, and I laughed, unable to contain the joy I felt surge through me. She fit perfectly against me, like she was made for me. Everything I'd been through was for this. I knew it with every piece of my soul. She was why I'd struggled through my recovery and eventually, strived to get well again. She made every pang, every tear, worthwhile.

"Hi, baby," I choked out, almost too overwhelmed to speak.

She cooed and reached up toward my face, yanking on my hair.

"Ow." I gently took her hand away and glanced up at where Edward was walking over to us. The smile on his face was the most incredible thing I'd ever witnessed; perfect, awed, and enraptured by the baby in my arms.

"Hey, Daddy," I breathed, letting him see her. "Want to hold her?"

"Yes," he said fervently. His eyes burned with emotion as he reached out and took her from me. He pressed a kiss to her hair and closed his eyes. "She's… gorgeous."

I wiped at my cheeks and tried to maintain some kind of composure. "I know." He put his arm around me and just held us there. Nothing else existed outside of the three of us, not anymore.

"Did her name stick?" I asked Edward, running my fingers along her hairline. We'd spent so much time debating a name for her, wanting to keep her Russian heritage somehow, but always reverting back to the same one each time.

Esme Elizabeth Masen.

He nodded. "I can't think of anything else, can you?"

"Nothing else fits. She's our Ellie."

God, it felt good to say that.

We went inside and talked to everyone, with the help of the translator, and watched some of the older kids play before seeing where Ellie had slept all this time. After the quick tour, we were invited to lunch. I juggled Ellie in my lap while trying to eat, spilling half of my food down my brand new, white shirt. Ellie reached out and smacked her hand in my plate, sending food flying all over Edward as well. He flinched when a potato slice splattered in his eye, and then grinned widely at the innocent face staring back up at him. It was… wonderful.

I ignored the protests of the workers and put Ellie down on the floor, so I could clean up the mess that was all over the table before moving on to myself. One look at Edward, doing the same, was enough to send me into hysterics.

"This is pathetic," I giggled. "How do people do this?"

"They don't start with a six-month-old," he answered on a laugh, wiping some kind of goo off of my forehead. "They gradually work up to all this activity. Just wait until she's Riley's age."

"And we can't give her back at the end of the day," I joked, abruptly picking her up off the floor and kissing her temple. "Not that we'd want to." I couldn't bear to give her back now.

All too soon, we had to leave for our court appearance—without Ellie. We were only allowed limited access to her until we were approved to take her home. We wouldn't be able to see her again until after our hearing, which had me sobbing uncontrollably all the way to the courthouse. Nothing Edward did helped. I just kept picturing the judge banging his gavel while he spouted off all the reasons why we couldn't take her home and started crying all over again. It was stupid. I knew, rationally, that we didn't have anything to worry about, other than some distant relative of Ellie's trying to stake claim to her.

But that didn't stop the worry from eating away at me.

Edward and I changed our clothes and found the courtroom our appearance was scheduled in, where we met up with our lawyer. I stared down at the dark wooden desk as our lawyer went over a few things with us. I had to block him out, too afraid to listen to him. Time closed in on me, and my heart started pounding the moment the door was opened to let the judge in the room. My palms were slick, and a wave of nausea rolled over me as we all rose…

Before I knew it, it was over. None of her family had shown up, but we were still adjourned for an hour—a fucking hour—while the judge made his decision. What were we supposed to do for an hour?

Our lawyer left us to attend to a few things while we waited. I sat on one of the benches, wringing my hands in my lap, before I decided that I needed to move. Sitting here was doing nothing to ease my mind.

Edward watched me pace around the hall anxiously for a few minutes before he finally sprung into action. He grabbed my hand and, despite my objections, pulled me into the women's bathroom.

He locked the door behind us and spun around on me, pushing my back against the wall as he kissed the absolute shit out of me. I threw my arms around him unthinkingly pulled him closer to me. He worked with the fly of my pants for just a second, and then his hand was snaking inside them.

Reality came crashing into me.

I gasped the moment he touched me and jerked my head back so I could see him. "What are you doing?" I demanded, reeling from the pleasure that he created with just a simple touch. "We're in the bathroom."

"You need a distraction. I need a distraction," he said, just before he took my mouth with his again. He yanked my pants and underwear down, and I suddenly found that the desperation that seared his kiss was now rushing through me. I wanted this, needed it. I wanted to do something reckless just one time without worrying about someone leaking information or pictures to the press, and this was our chance, maybe the only chance we'd ever have.

I couldn't get his pants down fast enough.

He roughly plunged his fingers inside me, and I gritted my teeth together so I didn't moan loudly, like I wanted to. Hot and heavy, everything unraveled between us, and before I knew it, we were sweating, panting—naked from the waist down—and he'd grabbed my ass and lifted me up off the ground, bracing me up on the countertop with one arm, before he lined us up and drove into me.

My head fell back against the tiled wall with a thump, and this time, I didn't bother stopping the groan that bubbled up in my chest with the feel of him finally inside me. Every pass was harder; each thrust pressed my body up further into the wall. His skin grew hot and damp as he exerted himself and held me up, and suddenly, I found my leg up further, sliding up over his arm toward his shoulder and drawing him deeper… It was a wonder he didn't drop me.

"Fuck, I'm going to come," I moaned, clinging to him and trying to bury my face into his shoulder so I could at least try to be quiet.

"Yeah," he grunted simply, thrusting into me one last time before he was overtaken by his own orgasm.

My back arched away from the wall, and my legs tightened around him as I struggled not to just fall apart and lose all cognizance. I very nearly saw stars; it was one of the most intense orgasms I'd ever had.

Edward eventually shifted us so he could see my face. He looked worried and satisfied all at once, and I found myself kissing him once again, grateful for how incredibly complex he was. I felt better now, not so scared. I was still a nervous wreck, but I wasn't on the verge of freaking out, like I'd been before. His distraction had worked.

"I wish I could thank my mum for all those yoga classes she's taken you to. That would have been impossible before."

I laughed and shook my head. "Yoga has its benefits, I suppose."

"I'll say." His expression abruptly went serious. "You're all right?" he asked, slowly bringing my legs down and watching every movement cautiously so he didn't hurt me.

"I'm fine. Just thinking that a bath in that antibacterial soap there would be a good idea," I replied, gesturing to the soap dispenser hanging beside us. "No telling what was on that wall."

He chuckled and reached out to flip the handle of the faucet up. "Hurry it up, will you? We have a baby to get after we're done here."

"You're sure we're getting her, aren't you," I said, running my hands through the warm stream of water.

"I've no doubt, love. By this time tomorrow, we'll be showing her round the flat."

I didn't bother answering him. I knew it would be pessimistic and would only serve to frustrate him.

We washed off and got dressed before we opened the door and checked the hall. There was no one in sight, so we quickly ducked out of the bathroom before we could be seen. I wrapped my arm around one of his and laughed at how strange it all was. We'd never had the freedom to do something like that until today.

"I kind of want to do something like that again," I whispered as he opened the door to the courtroom for me.

He gave me a puzzled look. "Shag in the bathroom?"

"Yeah."

His eyes had a wicked glint to them as he smiled crookedly. "I think that can be arranged."

Thankfully, we'd wasted enough time in the bathroom that we only had to wait a few minutes before the judge came back in. Words in Russian were spouted off, and I crept to the edge of my seat in anticipation for the verdict. I tried to get an idea of what they were talking about, but couldn't.

It was so fucking infuriating.

The judge banged his gavel—exactly how I'd pictured it—causing me to flinch. I grabbed a hold of Edward's hand and watched as the translator and our lawyer turned around, almost moving in slow motion…

They were smiling. My heart leapt and a quiet sob escaped my throat. We had a baby.

"He approved the adoption." Our lawyer was still beaming. "You can take her home whenever you're ready."

* * *

"… And this is your room," I murmured to Ellie as we walked inside the nursery.

It was everything I'd wanted for her; turquoise walls, and black and white striped bedding with just a few floral designs to make it girly, but not overly so. There was red in the artwork so that the room didn't look bland and a plush, red, rectangular rug for her to play on as she got older. We'd worked so hard to try and bring some meaningful piece of LA back home with us, and decorating a nursery in black and white—the same colors of the ball that Edward had proposed at—just seemed right.

It was my favorite room in the apartment.

"Unfortunately," I continued, "we can't stay. We have an impatient family waiting for us at Nana and Papa's house."

I walked over and pointed to the black, framed picture of Carlisle and Esme that sat on one of the shelves above her dresser.

"That's Nana and Papa," I told her, pulling the hood of her sock monkey sleeper off of her head. "They're the reason why you're here." My breath hitched, so I moved on to the other pictures before I started crying. "And that's your Aunt Alice and Uncle Jasper. This is Grammy Renée and your uncle, Riley. Grammy wants you to call her by her name, but don't listen to her. She's an idiot."

Edward's chuckle pulled me away from the rest of the pictures. I glanced back at him and grinned. He had that same, deeply thoughtful expression he'd worn on his face since we'd signed the papers and retrieved Ellie from the home.

"Daddy looks like he's going to cry again," I joked as I took her over to the changing table and laid her down, grabbing her outfit for tonight on my way.

I knew Edward was rolling his eyes behind me. I didn't bother turning to see it.

He came up behind us and put his chin on my shoulder, watching as I changed Ellie's diaper and put her into the gray floral dress we'd bought for her a few weeks ago. I slipped her little, black shoes on her feet and put a matching bow in her hair, grinning at how adorable she was.

"Ready to face the mob?" I asked when I was finished.

"I'd much rather just stay in with my girls," he said with a chuckle.

"We have lots of time for that," I replied. She wasn't going anywhere. Not now, not ever.

"So we do," he agreed. "It's better than I'd thought it would be," he admitted softly.

"What is?" I asked, picking Ellie up and turning to face him.

He smiled warmly and reached out to take her from me. "Seeing you with her. It's even better than I'd thought it would be."

I stood on my toes and stretched up to kiss him as the sentiment resonated with me. We were a family now. Seeing her here with us, in his arms and smiling as he gently played with her, was better than anything I could have ever dreamed up before.

It was the life I was meant for.

* * *

**Their adoption isn't perfect; I took a few liberties (because some of the regulations are just BS) but tried to keep it feeling real. Hope it worked ;)**

**I just want to say thank you to everyone who ever reviewed, rec'd, and alerted this thing during the last (almost) 14 months. I've said it before; it surpassed any of the expectations (which were few) that I may have had. **

**Epilogue will post 12/15. I have a few things happening, so I won't be able to write it immediately, like usual. I'll also post the Fandom for Preemies outtake that day, which coincides with the epilogue. **

**I am going to write something new after the new year, and it will post as soon as I have a few chapters beta'd and banked. If you want to know when it posts, you can do a few things: put me on Author alert, follow me on Twitter -(at) JennyB0719 - or read (which I encourage you to do so) While You Were Gone, because there'll be an announcement/link there, I'm sure. Seriously, give it a shot. It's a twist on canon New Moon, Eclipse, and Breaking Dawn and is so much fun to write with Stratan. I promise you won't be disappointed. We get the 'surprisingly pleased' review all the time, lol.**

**My lemony TMWCBM outtake on Dirty Cheeky Monkey's posted this morning. Go read and review mine and all the other amazing authors that have contributed to SML so far.**

**http:/www(dot) fanfiction(dot) net/ s/ 6448546/ 5/ Squeeze_My_Lemon**

**See ya in two weeks!**

**xx**

**Jen**


	46. Epilogue

**And... it's complete. **

**A/N at the bottom :)**

**BPOV takes place two years after chapter 45. EPOV takes place three years after BPOV, which means EPOV is five years after chapter 45. Just so there's no confusion. **

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* * *

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Epilogue

**Bella - Two Years Later**

It felt so strange, standing in front of a crowd of screaming fans. We hadn't attended an event like this since before we got married. The feverish clicks and flashing lights of cameras were familiar, but unwanted. We'd worked so hard to keep our life private, to give Ellie some kind of normalcy, but sometimes fate had a way of stepping in and giving you what you needed, instead of what you wanted. It had a way of giving you what you never expected, both good and bad.

I felt Edward's strong arm wrap around my waist as he shifted our position on the red carpet, holding me closer to him. His green eyes fell to my face, making sure that I was still all right after being on my feet for so long, and then went back to the crowd. I could feel his fingers inching toward the swell of my stomach as he smiled and waved, causing the sounds of the crowd to reach deafening heights.

"Holy shit," I breathed, burying my face in his shoulder.

"I suppose we've been missed," he said, grinning down at me.

"Ha. I think it's more like _you've_ been missed."

His smiled widened. "You've caused quite the stir lately, you know."

"Speaking of which, you should pull your hand back before you give our secret away."

He jerked his hand away so that it rested at the small of my back. "Blimey, this is hard."

"I know, baby. We won't be able to hide it much longer, though. Soon, it won't matter where you touch me."

His brow quirked in amusement.

"Oh, you know what I mean."

This was our unexpected, to stand here defying the odds, with a baby—conceived without any help from science—on the way. It was surreal. Shocking. Terrifying and undeniably hard, yet caused a joy that ran so deep, neither of us would ever be able to fully explain it. It gave me new meaning to the word "determination". I'd never been so determined to achieve something in all my life. From the moment Alice had forced me to take a pregnancy test, overcoming the pain, the aches—the fear of failure—had been my main focus. This baby's survival was infinitely more important than anything I'd ever done before. It was more important than my comfort or even my state of mind; my sanity had been questioned numerous times for even attempting this. One wrong move later down the road could cause a tear that was potentially disastrous. Neither of us was guaranteed to come out of it alive, and every doctor known to man had advised Edward and me to terminate.

But that was never an option. Our happiness, our family's happiness, relied on getting our baby here safely, risks and all.

Edward and I finished giving photo ops and went over to the line of press waiting for us outside the Kodak Theatre. I pulled away from him and hung back, letting the press focus on Edward, although, it was wishful thinking that the attention would stay there. The journalists would ask about Edward's movie and his Oscar nomination, but none of them would let the opportunity for some kind of exclusive with him pass them by. He was a recluse now, and getting the information he was once so willing to give always proved to be unsuccessful.

There was no announcement when we brought Ellie home, no interview or photo shoot to show off our little girl, no matter how hard Zafrina had pressed for one. Edward refused to subject her to this part of his life, wanting only to be known as "Daddy" for as long as humanly possible. This baby was no exception. The second a reporter asked about the speculation over a few recent photos taken of me, the interview was over.

I fidgeted with the top of my navy blue dress, trying to make sure that the enormous boobs I'd been blessed with recently were hidden as much as I could, which was completely useless; they hid themselves for no one.

"I should have never let Alice talk me into wearing a strapless dress," I mumbled to myself. A reporter next to where Edward stood took one look at me and ran over to shove a microphone in my face, hoping I'd be flustered enough to talk.

I pushed it away with a snarl. Not on her life.

I was considered high risk. Because of this, life kind of halted for us. I went to class, and then came home to Ellie and Edward. This trip to LA was the first time I'd let myself travel anywhere outside of Oxford and London in the few months that I'd been pregnant, and I was only here to support Edward. If he hadn't been nominated, and was merely presenting, I'd be on the couch with my feet propped up, dividing my attention between the toddler on the floor and the broadcast on the TV. To make this baby public, only to lose it and have our grief splashed all over the news, was unacceptable.

"Bella!"

I jumped at the sound of my voice being yelled from behind me and slowly turned to see Jacob coming over to me. I beamed at him and walked a few steps to meet him, only to be abruptly swept off my feet and into one of the tightest hugs I'd ever known—Emmett aside.

"Jake, put me down. Please," I begged, suddenly panicked that he was hurting the baby.

He put me on my feet with a stunned expression.

"Don't look away from my face. If you so much as look down, they'll all know. This chiffon is doing a damn good job hiding it. Don't fuck it up."

He nodded once before a massive grin crossed his face. "Why didn't you say anything?"

"We're not announcing it," I sighed. "We've only told our parents and his sister. Not even Rosalie or Emmett knows yet." We were waiting until I'd gotten to the point that the baby would survive, no matter what. To get all their hopes up, and then to fail…

"Why?"

"You know why."

His demeanor changed entirely, going from excited to serious in just a split second. "Are you feeling all right? Everything's going well now, I guess…"

"Everything's fine," I answered reassuringly. "We just don't know how long 'fine' will last. It could change at any time." It was reality, but it wasn't something I let myself dwell on. If I thought about what could happen, I'd never get out of bed.

"You're taking it easy, right? Not being stupid?"

"I'm not being stupid," I assured him. "This is the first thing I've done, outside of school, since we found out. Edward does so much with Ellie so I can be careful."

"Good. Do you um," he leaned forward so that no one could see his face, "know what you're having?"

I nodded and let an ecstatic grin crease my lips. It was the same smile I'd smiled two days ago when we had our ultrasound and saw our baby actually _resemble_ a baby for the first time, the day Edward and I both finally stopped worrying so much and let ourselves feel the happiness that came with this.

"Another girl," I said quietly, watching Jacob's face light up.

He laughed. "Poor Edward. Surrounded by estrogen."

"I rather like it that way," Edward said, coming up behind us. "So long as she looks like her mum, that is."

I shook my head and leaned back against him. "She'll look like you."

"Either way, you two are screwed. Ellie's going to be a knockout."

"Jacob Black, don't talk about my daughter that way," I laughed. "You're family."

He'd come to mean more to me than I ever thought he would. He was like a brother and called me out on my bullshit whenever I was being ridiculous. He had since that night I'd run into him when I was stupidly trying to leave Edward. Jacob could always phrase something so that it had this huge affect on me. It was inexplicable how he knew just what to say to make me see clearly again.

"Family that's not blind, Bella." He rolled his eyes. "Get inside and shut up. Bree's waiting for us."

We filed into the auditorium and talked with some of the other actors before taking our seats. I was seated on the end, thank God. No telling how many times I'd have to get up and head to the bathroom. It was all I did anymore, it seemed.

I toed off my shoes with a sigh. "Ah, Jesus, that feels good."

Edward glanced down to where I was rolling my ankles and chuckled. "It's been a while since you wore heels. I was afraid you might fall for a bit there."

I shook my head and fluffed my dress out so my stomach couldn't be seen. "And for good reason. You've seen me try to walk lately. It's not pretty."

The lights went down and Edward chanced a quick pat on my belly. "You're sure you're all right?" he whispered in my ear.

"I'm fine. I'm sitting down now, so you can stop worrying. Enjoy yourself."

He ran a hand through his hair, screwing up anything the stylist had managed before we left the house. "I'm so bloody nervous," he admitted. "There's no way I can enjoy myself."

"You've done this twice already. How can you be nervous?"

He shrugged. "I've no idea. I just am, love."

The ceremony seemed to take forever, and by the time Edward's category was up, I was nearly asleep. I couldn't help myself. Usually at this time, I've been asleep for hours already, surrounded by pillows and tucked up against Edward with Ellie's soft snores coming from the baby monitor.

God, I missed her already.

Edward hit my arm with a laugh. "Wake up, you."

I yawned. "Sorry. Jet lag."

"Among other things."

I started to say some sarcastic comment back, but stopped when I saw him blanch as Maggie Davison's voice rang out through the speakers, announcing the nominees for Best Actor.

I turned in my seat a little and ran my hands through his hair, unconcerned by the fact that a camera was trained on him right now. He needed to look good when he went up there. I knew he'd win. He'd worked too hard and spent too much time away from me not to.

"You've got this," I murmured.

He shot me a look that had me snorting with laughter which, in turn, broke through his anxiousness and caused him to grin crookedly back at me.

I fucking loved that smile.

The entire auditorium was silent as Maggie opened the envelope. Edward tensed beside me; neither of us could breathe as we waited to hear the results.

"…And the Oscar goes to," Maggie flashed a smile as she read the name, "Edward Masen."

* * *

**Edward – Three years later**

"No, no, no!" I shouted, rushing over to where Ellie was about to shake her bubble wand off on her sister. "Your mum will murder me if you get dirty."

"But, Daddy, Audrey wants bubbles," Ellie pouted in that mix of Bella's and my accent that melted my heart.

"Gently, love," I murmured, "or else the bubbles will spray everywhere. Then, it'll just be a mess and no bubbles for Audrey to play with."

I checked each of their lavender dresses for splatters and breathed out a sigh of relief when I found none. This day was incredibly important to Bella, and she was wound tight with nerves—anything was liable to cause her to burst into hysterics, the girls' appearances included. She'd finally completed all her schooling, gone through the masters and doctorate programs and was now getting ready to walk across a stage and accept the piece of parchment that declared she'd finally, after six years at Oxford, gotten her English D. Phil.

Six years of dissertations and fiction writing, of poetry and revisions. It'd been stressful for her, and there was a time when she wanted to take a break from all the work and simply enjoy her family—be nothing other than "Mummy" to the two little girls we'd been blessed with. This day, the reward, was worth every row we'd had, every day that I spent keeping the girls away from Bella so she could focus on whatever paper she was writing at that specific moment. I'd played mum for her more times than I could count, giving up my days to play dolls with Ellie and feed bottles to Audrey when she was still small…

I'd do it all over again, just to watch her finally fulfill her dream.

"All right, who wants to catch bubbles?" I asked, taking the container and wand from Ellie and backing away from them. "You can't run, though. You could slip and tear your dresses, and then Mummy would be quite upset." With me.

Ellie nodded solemnly. "Did you hear that, sissy? Daddy says you must be careful."

"Kay," Audrey said, twirling around and watching her dress spin out away from her legs. Her little, two-year-old body started to topple over as she lost her balance, but thankfully, she caught herself before she could fall on the hard stone.

"Audrey," I laughed, "what did I just say?"

"No' to," she said, grinning over at me impishly.

By all accounts, she shouldn't be here. She shouldn't have been conceived; her mother shouldn't have been able to go through a pregnancy in order to bring her into the world. But here she was, with her coppery colored hair, green eyes, and freckles. She had her mother's looks, and my coloring. She was the perfect mix of us; stubborn, kind, incredibly smart, and already had a flair for drama. She was, by definition, a miracle; one that we would forever be indebted to the higher power that gave her to us.

However fortunate we were to have her, it was the most difficult thing we'd ever gone through. From the very beginning, I'd been terrified that something would happen, and I'd lose one of them. I dreaded each day, knowing that _every day_, Bella's body was under tremendous strain. The bigger she got, the more likely she'd rupture with just a twist of her body, putting both of their lives in jeopardy from the potential lack of oxygen to Audrey and blood loss to Bella. I lived in fear for seven long months, watching Bella fight with innumerable pangs and aches. And instead of feeling relief from that fear when Audrey was born, it only managed to grow since she was born so early. Watching her sleep in an incubator with tubes and wires all over her tiny body was the hardest thing I'd ever done. Only when Audrey was finally released from the NICU and brought home with us did I feel as though I could breathe again.

I played with the girls as I waited for everyone to get here. The entire family had flown in for the occasion, and they were all to meet us here in Oxford before the ceremony so we could sit together. It'd been since last Christmas that we'd all been together, our schedules making it virtually impossible for all of us visit at once like we used to. I hated it, mostly because of how sad it made Bella, but it was life. Life moved on with or without you. There was nothing any of us could do about it.

"Edward!"

I spun around at the sound of Riley's voice and blinked as he raced over to me. "You're not Riley. What'd you do with him?"

"Edward," Riley laughed, flashing one little dimple he'd gotten from his father. In all other respects, he looked like Bella, only with lighter hair and blue eyes. "It's me!"

"I don't think so… My Riley is much smaller and has short hair. Your hair is long, and you're enormous!"

He pushed at me, still grinning. "It's me! Mom said I could grow my hair out."

"Whatever for? It's so… bushy. You want it to look like mine?" I teased, picking him up. "Good God, mate, what have you been eating? Lead?"

"Your hair is awesome, Edward." He reached up and tugged at it a little.

"You're definitely your sister's brother," I muttered wryly. Only the two of them would say my hair was "awesome".

I set him down so he could play with Ellie and greeted everyone else as they trickled over from the parking lot. With the exception of Rosalie and Riley, none of them had changed a bit. They all looked exactly as they had five months ago.

Rosalie walked over to me and gave me a quick peck on the cheek. "Where's the bathroom? I have to pee," she said, dancing around.

"Just inside to the right. There's a WC sign," I told her with a smile.

She made a face. "Bella told me about the WC shit. Emmett? Help me find it?"

"Sure, baby." He rolled his eyes and said as soon as Rosalie was far enough away not to hear him, "I'd have never guessed that having a baby would make her so damn dependent."

"At least she's not hormonal," I replied. I'd been shocked that Rosalie had mellowed rather than become the "crazy bitch" Bella had predicted.

He laughed. "Isn't that the fucking truth?"

Once Carlisle and Esme arrived, we all headed inside and took a seat. I kept the girls occupied with a snack until the ceremony began, and then quieted them down and turned their attention to the front of the room, where the professors were taking their seats in front of a wide aisle.

It was incredibly formal, and the girls, surprisingly, managed to be quiet until they spotted Bella down on the floor. It was all I could do to keep Ellie from screaming "Mummy!" down at her. She grinned and waved up at them, which of course, caused Audrey to cry for her.

"Shit," I murmured, scooping her up so I could take her outside. My God, she was absurdly loud. People were going to start glaring at me if I didn't get her out of here soon.

"I can take her," Alice offered. "You stay here and watch Bella."

"You're sure?"

She nodded. "Give her here, Edward. You shouldn't miss this."

I handed her over to Alice and sat back down, letting Ellie crawl into my lap and watch the rest of the ceremony.

"Daddy?" Ellie asked curiously in the midst of what seemed like the thousandth time we'd clapped that afternoon. "Is Mummy going to be able to fix my boo-boos like Papa?"

My brows furrowed. "How do you mean?" I whispered back.

"Mummy said she was going to be a doctor. Like Papa. Does that mean she can fix people at the hospital like he can too?"

I chuckled and kissed her long, blonde hair. "No, baby. It just means she went to school for a very long time. Your mum learned about books, not medicine."

"Oh."

The ceremony was finally over, and I took Ellie and hurried outside to take Audrey off Alice's hands. She'd always been uncomfortable with the kids when they were little, and as much as I teased her about it, I didn't want to make her suffer any more than necessary.

"Hey," I said as we approached her, "she's finished. We're supposed to meet Bella on the north side of the building."

"All right." She handed me Audrey's pink, stuffed bear. "She's very good, Edward. No need to rush out here and save me."

"I'm not saving you," I objected as I picked Audrey up and took Ellie's hand so that we could start back over to where everyone else was. "I just thought we'd hurry and meet up with Bella, that's all."

She jabbed me in the ribs with her elbow. "Right. Of course you were."

I searched through the sea of black for Bella, finally spotting her on the opposite side of the crowd talking with Charlie. I tightened my hold on Ellie's hand and wound our way through all the other graduates until we broke free and got close enough to let Ellie run over to where her mum was standing.

"Mummy!" Ellie rushed over to Bella and put her hands on her hips. "You don't have your cap on!"

Bella gaped at Ellie playfully and reached up to feel the top of her head. "Where'd it go? I swear it was just there!"

"Mummy," Ellie giggled. "You have it in your hand. Daddy, tell Mummy she needs a pair of glasses."

"You need a pair of glasses," I said dutifully.

"Says the man who's going to need bifocals in a few years."

"I am not," I argued, handing our squirming toddler to her mum. "I see just fine, thank you."

"Except half of the day."

"Only when I read."

"And that's half of the day."

"Shut up," I murmured, pulling her to me and kissing her long enough that Ellie made a sound of disgust.

"So what will you do now that you've graduated," I asked when I broke away. "Find that perfect teaching job you've been talking about?"

Sometimes, I still couldn't wrap my mind around the fact that Bella wanted to teach; especially after all the times that she'd claimed she hated the idea. But school was all she knew. It only made sense that she'd go from student to teacher… or in her case, professor.

Professor Isabella Masen. Quite catchy, if you asked me.

"I had an idea, actually," she responded, shifting Audrey in her arms.

Her cheeks filled with color, causing me to grin. "Which is?"

"Here, take her for a sec."

She handed me Audrey and turned to dig through the black bag she'd brought with her.

"This is something I've been working on with one of the art students." She gave me a colorful book. "It's probably horrible, but…"

"A children's book?" I asked in complete shock. After all this time, she still managed to catch me off guard and surprise me completely. "You wrote a children's book?"

Her blush deepened. "Yeah, I mean, I still want to teach, but when I have an idea… I thought I could at least try to write it out."

I skimmed over the story, flipping through the pages feverishly. Even though she never said the words, it was all about how Ellie came into our lives. "Bella, this is incredible."

She bit down on her lip while simultaneously smiling. "You're not just saying that?"

"I'm not just saying that," I confirmed. "It's really good."

"Oh, well, okay then."

"Come here, you." I cupped her face and kissed her once, feeling more pride swell inside me than I'd thought I would. "Congratulations, baby. You did it."

She giggled against my lips, opening her gorgeous brown eyes to stare up at me. "I did it. And it's all because of you."

"You'd have done it without me."

"No, I wouldn't have. I'd have stopped when I graduated from USC. I didn't have the money… or the will. You gave me this, Edward. So thank you."

I waved her off. She already knew how important she was to me, no need to reiterate it further. "Shall we eat?" I asked, glancing down at Audrey.

"We eat!" she repeated, clapping her hands.

"You heard her, love. We eat," I said with a chuckle.

"The boss has spoken. Let's go." Bella reached out for Ellie and kissed the tip of her nose as she picked her up.

Our life was a precarious balance between chaos and bliss. It was full of squeals, laughter, and tears. We never stopped; we barely slept. It'd taken us years to finally get here, to be genuinely happy. To be a family.

And it was exactly as I'd always hoped it would be.

* * *

**Thank you to everyone who've ever read (even those who flounced) and to my amazing beta, Stratan. This fic has huge meaning for me. It was the fic that brought the beta dude to me. It was the fic that gave me a bit of notoriety in the fic world - which is seriously fkn weird, lol. So I'm pretty sad to see it go.**

**FGB2 Team: I'm still working on the rest of the auction, I swear. SN's Edward stopped talking to me. Go figure. If you compare the TMWCBM epi to the futuretakes you guys got back in July, there's a discrepancy with the time jump. When I wrote the futuretakes, I hadn't considered extending the fic at all. So the timeframe for those are from chapter 43 and not the end, as originally planned. Does this make sense? Idk, shoot me a message if I've confused you.**

**If you want to read said futuretakes, let me know. A $5 to ALSF will get them to you. **

**Smut Mondays on Twilighted... My submission posts on Monday (12/20). It's a oneshot version of an upcoming fic I'm working on, Dear Maggie. So go check it out when it posts. Hopefully, it'll have you intrigued.**

**Also, check out WYWG if you haven't already or hunt me down on Twitter if you want. (at) JennyB0719**

**Don't forget to check out the outtake thread for the Fandom For Preemies outtake. It will post tomorrow (12/15)**


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